April 29, 2025 • 46 mins
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
You've just done something.
Speaker 2 (00:02):
I've done something which I was going to bring this
up in private, but then I thought we are running late,
need to record this episode.
Speaker 1 (00:10):
Of course, what better time than now. There's no better time.
You've pissed on the floor. I didn't. You did? I
definitely did not. Yes, you're a floor piss up. I
did not. I have great control. You went to the toilet.
How do you know? I don't sit.
Speaker 2 (00:24):
I don't know how you do it, but you managed
to get w wiz on the floor.
Speaker 1 (00:28):
I didn't.
Speaker 2 (00:28):
I stand by one of us, producer Jess, went to
the bathroom, came out and said him over there has
pissed on the floor.
Speaker 1 (00:36):
Dare did not. I did not. I see what I
WII must have had a boner or something.
Speaker 3 (00:42):
I don't know what you're doing in that guilty Welcome.
Speaker 1 (01:01):
Back to two my own webs. I'm trying to do
the intro.
Speaker 4 (01:05):
Bro.
Speaker 1 (01:05):
Sorry, you're not doing this, so I didn't.
Speaker 2 (01:07):
They Welcome back to two Doting Dads. I am Addie
Jay and this is a podcast all about parenting. It
is the good, it is the bad, and the relatable.
And we don't give advice ever at all.
Speaker 4 (01:19):
Except don't piss on the floor at Maddy's house, because
you'll find out.
Speaker 2 (01:22):
It's just I feel like most people would have a
decent amount of respect to not piss on someone else's property.
Speaker 1 (01:31):
Got to get back at you somehow. I don't want to.
Speaker 4 (01:34):
I honestly didn't know I did that.
Speaker 1 (01:37):
That's right.
Speaker 2 (01:38):
We are on holidays as a family. We've gone down
to the house and the house was looking great. You know, Tom,
I builder, who is just amazing. Kids, there's little fingerprints
fucking everywhere, sticky, so sticky.
Speaker 4 (01:55):
Bro, you give them something that's not even sticky, and
all of a sudden they've got fucking sticky.
Speaker 1 (02:00):
It's what are they doing? I think, what are they doing? Science?
Speaker 2 (02:02):
And I'm like, don't touch that, put that down, putting
their feet up on the wall, like just feet, and
also like coloring in. Just everything they do is just
making a mess. And I get it. They're young and
they're living their lives, living their best lives.
Speaker 4 (02:19):
If a child draws on a wall in your house,
what's the course of action in terms of discipline.
Speaker 1 (02:24):
I will beat them to a pulp. I would expect
nothing less.
Speaker 2 (02:27):
That is the fear that's been inflicted on them I'm
yet to do it, Thank heavens for anyone wondering I did.
Not my children, not yet. But there's a lot of
yelling right now. As far as the holidays go, it's
been it's been like a yellow minute.
Speaker 4 (02:41):
We offer talk about school holidays and how or just
holidays with your family in general, and it's like it's
meant to be like really fun, but it just ends
up being fucking nightmarees it's a nightmare.
Speaker 2 (02:51):
I mean Marley, she didn't realize she thought holidays, we're
just weekends. Like she didn't realize that.
Speaker 1 (02:57):
Oh bless.
Speaker 2 (02:58):
I was like, you're on holidays, and she's like, sweet weekends.
And then on Monday she was like, uh, school and
I was like, no, you're on holidays. She's never had
like she's always been a daycare, so she's never had holidays.
Speaker 4 (03:09):
Never had an Oscar thinks the word yesterday means anytime
any day that happened prior.
Speaker 1 (03:17):
I love that.
Speaker 4 (03:18):
So he'll be like, we'll go somewhere that we were
at like a year ago. He'll be like, we were
here yesterday. I was like, what are you talking about.
I'm trying to live with this anxiety that you know.
Speaker 1 (03:33):
Obviously house. Is it going to get lived in? Right?
Speaker 2 (03:35):
It's not museums, I know, but I just everything looks
nicer without kids in it.
Speaker 4 (03:40):
Off for sure, Like a brand new car and you
put a kid in it. Oh, they just ruin everything.
It's like they're carrying a constant bag of rubbish with them.
Speaker 1 (03:52):
It's like, oh, come in the.
Speaker 4 (03:53):
Car, don't let me just get my bag of rubbish.
Speaker 1 (03:56):
It's the worst. So, you know, I'm so glad.
Speaker 2 (03:59):
I agonized of every nook and cranny of that house
just to let my kids destroy it.
Speaker 1 (04:04):
The moment they moved in, They're like, is this eggshell white?
Not anymore? And then I come back booker white?
Speaker 2 (04:12):
What's the come back here? And you're pissing on the
fucking toilet floor seat. Jesus, can't you know?
Speaker 1 (04:18):
Just everywhere I turned, there's no concrete evidence that it
was me. Producer Jazz has photos. She's untrustworthy. You're right,
you're right, just photo Are you taking photos of my piss?
She just threw me a shaker. That means yes, I'm
into it. That's cool, very good, very good.
Speaker 2 (04:38):
I saw a guy on the drive down here by
the way up here. He was in the back of
the car and had his head out the window like
a dog on the highway, just like head out, like
mouth open.
Speaker 3 (04:51):
Maybe he ate something really spicy. I was like, I've
never seen that before.
Speaker 4 (04:55):
Maybe he's fueled by wind, very gassy, very it would
be so.
Speaker 1 (05:04):
Very good. Do you know what I saw?
Speaker 4 (05:05):
Speaking about something pit seat speaking about seeing things while driving.
I don't know if I've ever told you is one
time I was driving out of my grandmother's house, who
lives in Western Sydney.
Speaker 1 (05:15):
And we know Western Sydney.
Speaker 4 (05:17):
No offense, chess, it's pretty dicey, you know.
Speaker 1 (05:23):
No, Actually I love Western Sydney.
Speaker 4 (05:26):
Whoa, heyjeuz I didn't say I didn't like that.
Speaker 2 (05:30):
I'd love to know what portion of our listener is
from Western Sydney. If you are listening and you do
reside in the West of Sydney, please let us know.
Speaker 1 (05:39):
Well, this might be you. If you're listening listening in
the car.
Speaker 4 (05:42):
Perhaps I was at the lights on the way out
west and I look over to someone in their car
and they were smoking an ice pipe.
Speaker 1 (05:50):
What suburb is this? Gilford Classic Guildford.
Speaker 4 (05:54):
Yeah, So if you are listening, enjoy that math The fhetamine.
Speaker 1 (05:59):
Yeah's meth and ice the same thing. Yeah, it is. Yep,
it is great, great spoke, spoken like a true addict. Anyway,
I look over and he's blazing up, just couldn't wait
to get home. I don't know. Maybe he just likes
to live life on the edge, or maybe it's addicted.
Speaker 2 (06:16):
It's a certain like there's a line, isn't it when
you're a meth head, but you do it in private,
But when you're a meth head you do it in public.
You're like you've crossed the line.
Speaker 1 (06:26):
That myth must have been Moorish? You getting back for seconds? Okay,
what do I go for? What do I go for? Hey?
Speaking of substances? Good segue, seg, thank you.
Speaker 4 (06:41):
As you know, obviously goes to primary school much like
Marley and primary schools schools in general, they have a
lot of outside of school our activities, like he just
went off the top of my head, like pizza and
puzzle night, okay, which is usually like Father's Day.
Speaker 1 (06:59):
Right, and I know that puzzle.
Speaker 4 (07:03):
Yeah, it's like it's like after hours, right, so it's
like four o'clock sounds sexual pizza and penises, pizza, pizza
and Dad's penis yeah, okay.
Speaker 1 (07:19):
Let me get back on track.
Speaker 4 (07:20):
Outside of school now, a lot of these things are
alcohol free zones, as you can imagine, because what.
Speaker 2 (07:31):
What no, just imagining you rocking up? Did Pizza and
Puzzle night with the case of beer?
Speaker 1 (07:38):
Yeah? I thought it was pizza puzzle and case of
pizza puzzle And no, no, no, very funny. I just know. Sorry,
I know thought you You're like you sound like annoyed
and surprised. I tried to take my meth pipe with
me again.
Speaker 4 (07:59):
You know they're but they also do events that are
like parents only, like for fundraiser.
Speaker 1 (08:08):
I'm not going to get through these fucking hell only ones.
Let me come to those.
Speaker 4 (08:16):
On three keys and anyway, so the adults only nine.
Speaker 1 (08:24):
Yeah, fucking hell god. Anyway, we went to what they
call a mingle. This story sounds terrible.
Speaker 4 (08:41):
This sounds like a horrible Sorry what happens the adult
only mingles?
Speaker 1 (08:48):
No, this was this was the kids. This was a
there were kids. There were kids on this mingles. Actually
bring one kid.
Speaker 4 (08:58):
Anyway, all these events are alcohol free, and it begs
the question why, okay, outside of school hours this parent.
Speaker 1 (09:06):
Mingle was for I can't get I can't look at you.
I look at the floor, Look at the floor. I
questioned why there's no alcohol?
Speaker 4 (09:13):
And I found out that there used to be alcohol
at these after school events, like the fundraising shit, the parents'
nights or whatever there used to be until trivia night
last year. Apparently all the parents got really lit and
they ended up finding alcohol like bottles around the school.
Speaker 1 (09:38):
What is wrong with people? I think it's really funny.
What's wrong with people? Come on, this is for the kids.
Well they ruined it for all of us. Anyway, we
went to the mingle.
Speaker 4 (09:46):
How drunk were they getting? Apparently they were lit like list.
It was a fundraising trivia end of years.
Speaker 1 (09:52):
And you talk about Western Sydney being bad, the northern
beaches of Sydney a bunch of his heads.
Speaker 4 (09:58):
Yeah yeah, but nothing else to do sink piers at schools,
at the school mingles, at the school mingle. So we
went to the KINDI Mingle, which was not run by
the school all right, it's run by some volunteers and whatever.
And it was like the P and C whatever it
might be.
Speaker 1 (10:15):
And I was like, it would be Friday, whatever it
may be. It's the peens. It's a Friday afternoon it's
the p and C. Okay, the event was, Ah, why
are you going to argue me on the pens? I
don't care about the p and C. I've never heard
of them. Well, the school has a P and C.
The P and C.
Speaker 4 (10:29):
Organized a KINDI parent mingle, so you meet the other
parents because obviously now we've been grouped into classes and
now I'm forced to be friends with people that don't
want to be friends with. Also, all the parents out
there that go to my kids school, I love you.
I have some friends that we all their kids go
to this to the same school, and I thought, I
(10:49):
don't want to go to an alcohol for event on
a Friday, so I took a six pack. But the
difference is with the six pack is I wrapped all
the beers in and in a nappy like a cool No.
Speaker 1 (11:01):
Don't you just look like a fucking weird like a
weirdo sniffing nappies. I don't sniff my beers, bro, I
chuggle them. Are you hiding a beer in a nappy? Yeah?
Like that looks weird. Like you're better off just going
to the toilet.
Speaker 4 (11:16):
That's way creepy because the people think I'm doing some
illicit drugs in there.
Speaker 2 (11:19):
Don't look any better walking around with like four nappies
in your hand. A nappy guy, how do you assume
I only had four? No one would be able to
suspect it.
Speaker 3 (11:27):
What do we got?
Speaker 1 (11:27):
That is one of the dumbest things I have ever seen.
Speaker 4 (11:31):
Well, the jokes on you because I got away with it.
When we were in the cool corner, people were coming
over again, what's going on over here? I'm like, nappy
beer can?
Speaker 1 (11:38):
I make a suggestion.
Speaker 2 (11:40):
You're better off getting a coke can and getting a
tolley and pouring a tolly into the coke can.
Speaker 1 (11:46):
Too much work. You just look weird that you're holding
a dirty nappy. That's funny. That's part of the joke.
But like, don't question me.
Speaker 4 (11:52):
It works. Sorry, it worked up until we were leaving
and I had to empty the bag full of beer
cans into the recycling being, which is full of like, so,
what do you do drink can?
Speaker 1 (12:03):
What do you do with the nappies? Oh, they're in
there too. I'm taking a stand. April is a lucky lady.
Speaker 4 (12:08):
If they're going to force me to be friends with people,
then I'm going to be drinking. Are your events not
alcohol free or do you go to them?
Speaker 1 (12:16):
We haven't been to I don't know. Wow, we haven't
had any. Actually we had one wrap up party, not
wrap up party, rap up. We had one like welcome
party for the kindie okay, after hours on a Friday,
and it was kids too. Kids went.
Speaker 2 (12:29):
I was down the coast so I wasn't there. Do
you know if it was our colfer it I don't know.
Speaker 1 (12:34):
I will ask for you.
Speaker 4 (12:35):
I think if you do it look as a school okay,
I get it inside school hours. No not rocking up
to a midday assembly, and least anyone someone would be
if you have But like I think, if you're okay,
hey Friday afternoon, after school hours.
Speaker 1 (12:52):
You should have a tipple. You should be allowed to
have a tipple. I'm not saying get like hammered. I
had like eight beers, but that's not the point. That's
I can. I can handle it. And then a bit
of math. But I think if you.
Speaker 2 (13:07):
Have to say you're joking, because people might oh shit, yeah, sorry,
might not know that you're not being I'm not a
math head yet, but I think that they should be.
Speaker 1 (13:19):
You should be able to have a tipple. Yeah, I
agree with that. Okay, but well done. Well done for
your ingenuity. I thought that was groundbreaking.
Speaker 4 (13:27):
You are.
Speaker 1 (13:27):
You're a very magiv. I'm the magiver of beer drinking.
Oh yeah, next time I'll come up with something a
little bit more. I'll just strap it to a child.
I'll be like, let me have a sip. Hey, you
did something before I pisced on the floor. I get it. No,
not that one. You found something that you shouldn't have.
(13:48):
It's a photo of ultrasound because we're having a baby.
Speaker 4 (13:52):
Whoa, But I kind of already knew who. I just
tell how I tried to pour your lovely wife, Laura. Congratulations.
Speaker 1 (14:05):
By the way, I'm holding photo of a young fetus,
a beautiful Johnson fetus. Is it a boy or a girl?
We don't know. I didn't shock right now.
Speaker 4 (14:20):
I know I tried to pour Laura a drink when
we when you return from the jungle, and that drink
was denied, and I had a suspicion. I had suspicions.
I also haven't seen Laura in a while. Also, yeah,
that's probably about it. And I know there's been talk
(14:41):
about it, and I just knew. Also, someone might have
spilled the beans.
Speaker 1 (14:45):
Who who? I'm not telling me I know, because I
will get in trouble. Just tell me I forced it
out of someone. Who give me some ellie? Yeah? Did
you have her against the wall? Literally that war?
Speaker 4 (15:00):
I have her against that wall right there? Because I
said to Laura, I was like, hey, I brought some
margaritas the can and it's look one can, it's like
two and a half standard drinks. Like I'm trying to
get lit here. Yeah, And I was like, do you
want to go halves? And she was like yeah, yeah, yeah,
very tentative. And I was and I look over your
mum and she was like.
Speaker 1 (15:19):
I was like, okay, she's signaling like, don't do that.
She's so Because she was so, I was like, do
you know what I did? After that?
Speaker 4 (15:32):
I looked at her and I was like, come here,
and she was like she knew a white straightaway that
I was going to crack this safe immediately.
Speaker 1 (15:40):
And I was like, you better tell me right what's gone?
What did she say? She's a terrible liar And she
was like, no, I can't.
Speaker 4 (15:50):
I can't tell me. That's exactly what she sounds like.
I could never I could never tell you and I
was like, what are we going to do. Is I'm
going to ask you a question, You're going to nod
your head. And I was like, is Laura pregnant?
Speaker 1 (16:01):
And she was like yeah. I was wondering where she
got those bruises from. Sorry about that. And then I
was like I was like, fucking okay, all right, I
know it and I know it now. And she was like, oh,
don't tell them.
Speaker 4 (16:14):
I told you they beat me, so congratulations. I already knew,
but congratulations, this is going to ruin us financially.
Speaker 1 (16:25):
So we got give me a look at this baby.
Speaker 4 (16:28):
When are we?
Speaker 1 (16:29):
Okay? Hang on November? No, sooner October October? Baby, I
was close. It's late October there, right, No, what it's in.
Speaker 2 (16:38):
Mid We were trying before I went into the jungle,
just in case you didn't come back. The plan was
we said this year twenty twenty five, if we are
going to have a third, this will be the year
that it happens. Because I'm conscious that Marley and Lola
really close together. They're about eighteen months Nowlas just turned four,
(17:01):
and I was like, if it doesn't happen this year,
you know, it's a big gap. It's a big gap.
Speaker 1 (17:05):
Also, it's like accidental gap, you know. We were like, oh,
it must have been an Actually it's like it's.
Speaker 2 (17:10):
A bit of double edged sword in that great because Marley,
I guess, the older she comes, the older she turns,
the more capable she is as a second third parent
the main parent, which is great. But then we're like,
we don't want you with that third child to still
be friends with Marley and Lola.
Speaker 1 (17:28):
And the third child always gets forgotten about it.
Speaker 2 (17:30):
Like they do, don't they You're the thing, Oh yeah,
like you know exactly how how I turned out. But
we said we're going to try, and we're kind of
even said, we're like, if it doesn't happen before the jungle,
like by the time I come back, it's going to
be February, you know. And they're like, you know, for
those who don't know, it takes nine months for a
baby to grow in a woman's body. Then we're like, oh,
(17:51):
that's pushing in the two thousand and twenty six.
Speaker 4 (17:54):
Yeah, and we're kind of like, I have a summer baby,
like immediate, like you know, no October, it's still it's close.
Speaker 2 (18:02):
But so and I said to Laura, if I make
it to the end of the jungle, and I was like,
fucking tell me, like if if you get if you'll
find out you're pregnant whilst I'm away when you come
on the show, Like tell me, right. So then obviously
she didn't tell me, and then I kind of didn't.
It wasn't like front of mine. But we came back
from the jungle and I was like, oh, I guess
(18:26):
you're not pregnant, and she was like nah, I was
thinking about it and probably like not the wisest thing
for us to do, right We're in a really good
position right now.
Speaker 1 (18:34):
And I was like, yeah, do you know what you know?
Speaker 2 (18:37):
I was like, you're probably right, Like what were we thinking?
Trying to have a third Man's pretty crazy? And then
and then there's a video. I'm assuming by the time
this comes out, this video will be posted. But Laura
then she goes, oh, someone gave me a scratchy and
you scratch it. And I was like, oh, a little
scratch scratchy. Sure, So I'm scratching it. And it was
(19:00):
a really bad quality scratchy, like it was at a
coin And as I was scratching off the top layer,
it would then take that first layer off and then
when you went to reveal like what's printed underneath, it
was taking the print off as well, and.
Speaker 4 (19:15):
I was like, this is.
Speaker 1 (19:18):
I was like, and I was.
Speaker 2 (19:19):
It was one of those hard ones where I was
trying to figure it out, like it was like match
four of these icons, and if you get two of
this one, it means you get that one on the
first right, which underneath that one there.
Speaker 1 (19:27):
Is that how you get pregnant. Do the scratchy. So
I'm scratching and I'm like, this is shit, throw it
out and then she's like, keep on scratching, and then
you scratch it.
Speaker 2 (19:39):
It was like fifteen icons and then then like a
little tiny bottom right one it said you're having a baby,
and I was like, where's the money? And then I
was like I was very confused, and also I was
in the mindset of like do we want to have
a third?
Speaker 1 (19:54):
Yeah? You were like talking yourself out of it.
Speaker 2 (19:56):
We were straddling both sides of the party. Nice I
was now I'm got visuals.
Speaker 1 (20:03):
One hand.
Speaker 2 (20:03):
We were like, it'll be amazing to have three kids.
You know, I grew up was one of five. Imagine
when we're older having a house full of three children
and their partner's beautiful. But then on the other hand,
I'm like, we're kind of like out of the trenches.
Speaker 4 (20:16):
Now, yeah, you like you're talking now. I don't want
to sound you're talking now. Back to bassin there.
Speaker 2 (20:23):
Back to we don't we don't use nappies in the
house anymore. We don't use the pram anymore.
Speaker 4 (20:28):
Yeah, my pram is covered in cobwebs. I looked at
it the other day and it was looking back at
me like shut up, yeah, where now. I spoke to
someone who has a newborn, and I was like, what's
that like?
Speaker 1 (20:42):
It sucks. It's I've forgotten. I've forgotten all those years
of what it's what it's like having a third kid.
I knew you would. I knew it was going to happen.
I just did. I thought maybe next year.
Speaker 2 (20:56):
I also when when I found out in that moment
when we had the scratchyet, I think we were at
what we were maybe like twelve weeks, eleven weeks, so
we have it. We didn't even have like the big tests.
So then I also was conscious of like, you know,
I don't want to it's very early days. I don't
want to celebrate it and be like, we're having a
kid because we've our cycle. When I say hours, Laura's
(21:19):
we've had first child was a miscarriage. Then Laura was
pregnant with Marley. Then after Miley was born, she got
pregnant again. We lost that child at around twelve weeks shit,
and then we had Lala. So you know, I'm kind
of looking at the roadmap of which we just come
down and I'm like, well, we're kind of due for
another miscarriage, so.
Speaker 1 (21:39):
How many weeks are we now? So we are currently
because I'm equally as involved in this together, Laura is
currently I've lost count. She's fourteen or fifteen weeks. Wow.
Speaker 2 (21:51):
So yeah, So we went and had went, had the
few tests done, but there's a lot of I thought
there was just one test at twelve weeks.
Speaker 1 (21:59):
I think just opt in for a few different there's
a few different ones, and I was kind of waiting
for the bad news, like for something to go wrong,
and I was like excited at the moment, but then
I was like, you know, until where I don't know,
I guess like you're holding the baby in your hand, Yeah,
exactly exactly.
Speaker 2 (22:16):
So then I was every test I was kind of
waiting and they're you know, taking all the measurements and
like the heartbeat and everything else, just waiting for something
to go wrong.
Speaker 1 (22:25):
It was very weird.
Speaker 2 (22:27):
I don't know if you recall ash when you go
in excuse my ignorance here ultrasound. Oh I got sea sick.
That's right, you passed out. But there was a student
doctor who was in the room. He was very good looking,
very good looking, and like the ultrasound. It's not that invasive,
you know, if anyone's well, but you have one where
(22:50):
they like, you know, you pull your pants down quite
a bit and your belly is exposed and they scan it.
Then they have the one that's like a big old
banana size like instrument, and I was in the chair
in the corner and it felt like is it called
the cock chair?
Speaker 1 (23:11):
Yeah, you were cocked. My guy, a good looking doctor
inserted something into your wife.
Speaker 2 (23:19):
They're good looking doctor did the optra sound over the belly,
and then they were like, we'll be back in one second.
And then Laura was like, I wonder if he's going
to do like the next part, which is like the
banana rocket, And I was like, hope.
Speaker 1 (23:30):
So I'm joking popcorn.
Speaker 2 (23:34):
Yeah, I was.
Speaker 1 (23:35):
Let me get the tissues out, beautiful.
Speaker 2 (23:40):
He didn't come back. He didn't come back. We had
the lovely older doctor female do that part.
Speaker 1 (23:49):
Laura was like, thank god it wasn't him. He was gorgeous,
gorgeous young doctor. Anyway.
Speaker 2 (23:55):
Here, So we're still where we're fifteen weeks. We've had all,
like all the major tests done. Everything's looking good and
everything's tracking nicely.
Speaker 1 (24:06):
And with the gender, you're not going to tell anyone
of this. The big question was big question was Marley
and Lola.
Speaker 2 (24:13):
We found out at birth the sex, and I was like,
this is great, like it's lovely. But first child, I
was happy with whatever. Second child, I thought everyone else
thought that Lola was going to be a boy, so
I just had it in my mind that it was
going to be a boy. So there was just a
split second. But like gender surprise where you're like, oh,
(24:33):
I wasn't expecting that. It's like you're thinking you're going
to get a chocolate cake and you got a sponge.
A sponge is still great. I'll eat a sponge, no
questions asked. But at the same time, I just was
expecting a chocolate cake and mudcake. Do you know what
I'm saying, You're picking up what I'm putting down.
Speaker 1 (24:45):
I am, And now I'm just hungry.
Speaker 2 (24:49):
And so I just said to Laura, like, I want
to go into birth because it's all about me.
Speaker 1 (24:55):
I'd like to know. And I think childbirth is beautiful.
Speaker 2 (24:59):
Enough of the moment that you don't need it to
be at another like added level of surprise. But Laura
was like, how amazing. You don't get many surprises in
life for what reason?
Speaker 1 (25:08):
Like we get what's the yeah, yeah, yeah, what's the right?
Speaker 2 (25:10):
And I was like, well, let's let's pad this out.
We can have a surprise now, and then childbirth is
still great. It's not like you're not going to enjoy
childbirth because you know the sex of your child.
Speaker 1 (25:18):
You're still going to enjoy it. It's going to be
the sexy child is going to be the sexuy child
for the rest of his life. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (25:22):
So well, so I was like, let's find out prior
so a bit of debating, I won nice because you
know this is we are not going for a fourth Yeah,
I think we're.
Speaker 1 (25:33):
You know, Laura's forty, she's thirty nine, she's young and fertile.
She's not, well, she's a geriatric.
Speaker 4 (25:41):
She's not, she's medically it's just thirty nine medically, yeah, yeah,
old of those medically medical medically is like we're saying
she's geriatric in afford it.
Speaker 1 (25:51):
It's like imob.
Speaker 4 (25:52):
Technically called to the B and I scale how old
are these thinks? They're not wrong, that's mean, but geriatric
at forty?
Speaker 1 (25:59):
What for pregnancy? For pregnant? I was going to say,
when was this scientific record kept from the forties.
Speaker 3 (26:06):
It's just when it comes to pregnancy, it's very offensive.
That is offensive. I'm offended for her. And she's thirty nine?
Speaker 1 (26:13):
Is she she's thirty nine?
Speaker 4 (26:15):
Yeah, which is almost forty. Sorry, what is the new thirty? Anyway, congratulations,
that's amazing, Thank you very much. Like I said, I
knew it was coming. I didn't know it was coming
this early, and I also was waiting for you to
tell me because I knew. And then also I found
that over there and I walked in and I said,
(26:37):
do you have something to tell me? And you gave
me this look like like no, and I was like,
oh no, embracing for the worst. So I'm I'm glad
it's the best, the best result, Thank you very much.
Speaker 2 (26:49):
And so I didn't tell you sooner, No that I
wanted to surprise you on the pot, but fucking that
was harder than I thought, because you are a detective
I am.
Speaker 4 (26:57):
Do you know I lived next door to a good
friend of mine a while ago across the hall, and
I also picked twice when she was pregnant without them
before they told us i'd have a gift.
Speaker 1 (27:10):
Jess is not pregnant gift. That's a gift. Point someone out.
This might sound weird, but I don't have a kink
with pregnant women. Oh yeah, you don't.
Speaker 2 (27:23):
But I find Laura at the moment, she's popping a
lot more than the previous pregnancies.
Speaker 1 (27:30):
Wait normally works. She also doesn't answer my calls.
Speaker 2 (27:34):
She's been avoiding your bellies popped like I think with Marley,
she didn't pop right until the final trimester. Whereas now
that belly's out and Laura's like, oh, I just feel
so fat. I hate it, And I'm like, damn girl,
I'm like, whoh ring that belly?
Speaker 1 (27:52):
I love it.
Speaker 4 (27:54):
Get the vitamin E cream out and rather it's just like,
because you know it helps the trench marks right.
Speaker 1 (28:01):
Get in there, man, deep in there, you know, like
all over, just the belly, just a belly. Feet. Work
on the feet. Nah, that Laura has dry feet. I'm
not a foot guy, if I'm honest. The hands of
(28:23):
the legs.
Speaker 3 (28:24):
Okay, well, I'm gonna I look forward to lubing Laura
luber ride with a vitamin E cream or some baby oil,
slipping slider.
Speaker 1 (28:33):
I find a horse what what do you mean?
Speaker 4 (28:38):
Gymnastics and there's that thing they get get all handsy
and they they fling their legs around.
Speaker 3 (28:43):
That's a I'm going to ride Laura like a pommel horse.
You're ready, She's going to be the apparatus. I hope
she's ready.
Speaker 1 (28:50):
She would be ready.
Speaker 2 (28:52):
There is no other moment when I find Laura more
attractive than when she's pregnant.
Speaker 4 (28:57):
You've got to kink my guy. I mean, get my
list of pregnant women up here. I've got a folder.
Speaker 1 (29:04):
I just I don't know, it's beautiful. Keep my hands
off that. I can't wait for my for you page
to just be pregnant. Yeah, we're also. I haven't celebrated it.
Speaker 2 (29:20):
Really. I have moments where I'm like, oh, wow, you know,
what's it gonna try to envision having a newborn baby
in the house and I'm trying to imagine it at
the same time. Every time I start to imagine it,
I put the handbreak up because I'm like, I know,
I don't wanna.
Speaker 4 (29:36):
Is it because of you put your handbreak up because
you don't want to celebrate in case something happened.
Speaker 1 (29:41):
Is that what I'm picking up?
Speaker 2 (29:42):
Yeah, because we've been down that road a number of times,
and especially like the the first time Laura was pregnant,
which is obviously each pregnancy is special, but the very
first time, Like, there is no greater change in your
life as an adult from when you go from no
kids to having kids, and so that first one is
the biggest moment of all, I think, And that first
(30:04):
one is you know, you, that's when I don't know
what you were like, but I was, you know, I
was spending every second imagining like, oh my god, what
is it going to be like being a parent, Like
this is actually going to happen. And then when that's
taken away from you, you know, there's no greater emotional
whiplash than having a miscarriage.
Speaker 4 (30:25):
Yeah, and I haven't thankfully I haven't had to experience that.
But also I think like what we do on this
pot is we do practice. We do preach a little
bit is like don't don't go through all that stuff alone,
like don't feel that you can't celebrate your wins.
Speaker 2 (30:43):
Yeah, And I think I think as as we get closer,
because in my mind, we're still like at the beginning
of still of the of the pregnancy, and even like
when Laura was pregnant with Mali and pregnant with Lola,
there was there was lots of times throughout where we
were super anxious because we're just waiting for something to
go wrong, and you have little moments where baby doesn't
(31:04):
move that much, and you might have one or two
day period where previously baby was really active and now
it's not, and so you just, you know, like you're
just waiting for those signs that something might be going wrong.
And it's so hard because you know, when you do
experience a miscarriage, like wasn't as if Laura did anything wrong.
You know, it's not as if she like behaves in
(31:25):
a certain way which encouraged a miscarriage to happen.
Speaker 1 (31:28):
It's just, unfortunately, just part of life.
Speaker 2 (31:31):
It wasn't meant to be just happened, and so you
just you just got to be this passenger on the
journey and just hope and pray that you know, it's
going to turn out all right.
Speaker 4 (31:40):
Fortunately I haven't had to experience that feeling of a miscarriage,
but when it does happen, what sort of feelings come
to the surface.
Speaker 2 (31:49):
I think the first time it happened, we were overseas
and Laura experienced a little bit of bleeding, and that
bleeding progress, it got a little bit heavier, and I
remember her saying to me, like, oh, like, there's a
lot of blood here, and you know, you instantly you
realize it's not a good sign, and there's not a
(32:13):
whole lot you can do, Like you just have to
like a you're kind of hoping that the bleeding stops,
and then you go to the doctors, you get scans done,
and you know, you're kind of just hoping, hoping that
you get good news. And I think I I think
(32:33):
I was preparing myself for the bad news. There was
so much bleeding over a longer period of time, so
I kind of thought to myself, like my.
Speaker 1 (32:41):
Intuition was that this is really not good and do
they give you a reason? There's no reason.
Speaker 2 (32:47):
So we found out we had scans done, there was
no longer a heartbeat, so we knew that we had
lost the baby. And there's not the hardest thing is
there's not like a specific reason.
Speaker 4 (32:58):
You know.
Speaker 2 (32:58):
It's not like they say, because you did X, we
lost the baby, you know, which almost would be easier to.
Speaker 1 (33:06):
Stomach because you know what to do not to do
next time. Yeah, that's it exactly if it was that,
But it's not because you know, I remember for Laura,
her biggest thought was why I've done something to make
this pregnancy when she hasn't, not at all.
Speaker 2 (33:23):
Yeah, And like that, the biggest bit of communication was
to Laura that this is not your fault, Like you
haven't caused this. You know, there's nothing wrong with you
because obviously you're carrying the baby. And she's like, well,
maybe I'm not a good carrier. Yeah, maybe there's something
wrong with my body that means that I'm not going
to be able to carry a baby. And like Laura
was so worried that it was something that she had
(33:45):
done her there's something that was wrong with her.
Speaker 1 (33:47):
So you're trying to like trying to.
Speaker 2 (33:49):
Communicate and reassure her that like she hasn't done anything
wrong here. The best way that I could digest the
situation is that you kind of think like it was
always going to happen this way, and they they can
test for level of hormones and sometimes like the more
hormones you have is a good sign.
Speaker 1 (34:08):
But my mum told me this.
Speaker 2 (34:11):
She just said that sometimes the body just has to
do a test run and there's no like medical backing
for this. I think it was just an easy way
of my body. It was an easy way for me
to kind of see the situation from the point of
view that it was just body making sure that everything
was where it needed to be to prepare for the
one that was going to be the one and so
(34:33):
but yeah, and afterwards, you kind of think, from my perspective,
you know, I was obviously upset because that baby that
I was imagining was gone. It was you know, it
was never going to be. And then you can't help
it think like what could have been, Like what could
have been that little baby if it had made it,
(34:54):
and you can't help it think about that outcome.
Speaker 1 (34:57):
But then as well, for law.
Speaker 2 (35:00):
She's dealing with the emotional distress of a miscarriage, but
in the physical side as well, you know, it's really uncomfortable.
Speaker 4 (35:08):
You know.
Speaker 2 (35:08):
It's I'm lucky that for a guy, you know, I
could go for a run and try and get my
mind off things, whereas doorphins and totally do something to
distract myself. But for a woman, you know, they're dealing
with it like every second of the day. Like physically
it hurts as well. So it's it's there's a constant
(35:30):
reminder of what they're experiencing, so they don't have the
ability to switch off from it.
Speaker 1 (35:35):
For your first one, what point how far along?
Speaker 4 (35:38):
I think we're about twelve weeks, Okay, so it can
happen and figure my ignorance again, it can happen in
different circums a different times, right.
Speaker 2 (35:48):
Yeah, it's obviously a higher risk of miscarriage earlier on. Yeah,
and so there's kind of that reassurance in my mind,
like now I'm like, okay, Well, every every week that
we don't have any issue is a week that we're
kind of like, not the clear, but we're kind of
itching towards being in a place where we don't have
to worry every day. About it and as hard as well,
(36:11):
because when you're in the first twelve weeks, we've been
conditioned not to tell people.
Speaker 1 (36:17):
Yeah, for sure.
Speaker 2 (36:18):
And I remember mates who would be like eight weeks
pregnant and they would tell people that. I'd be like,
what are you doing, Like you can't you shouldn't be
telling people, Whereas I actually think now it's really stupid.
I think whoever said you shouldn't tell anyone before twelve
we look back at that, you're like, tell everyone.
Speaker 4 (36:34):
Because it's a thing as well, Like when I was saying,
like I was trying to find the words where it's like, yeah, okay,
you're not going to be celebrating because you've got this
fear still, which it's completely normal. But then also it's like,
why will suffer alone with it totally because you're already
I mean, for Laura in the first instance that happened,
You've got the physical side of it. You mentioned the
(36:56):
mental side of it, and also the self worth side
of it as well. But then also it's like like
I can only and it's going to lead me into
my next question. I can only really talk to Matt
about this. But my next question is if we're all
out here talking about it. As someone who's close to
Laura other than you, how do you think that they
could have supported.
Speaker 2 (37:15):
It's hard because you know, if someone is in the
early stages of pregnancy, unless you'r ash Wicks where you're
very dialed into being able to guess it, no one's
going to know. And so it's it's a really heavy
topic to bring up with someone who doesn't know what
you're going through. You know, if in that moment after
it had happened, and someone asked me a question of hey, Matt,
(37:36):
how are you, if you respond and go, well, we
just found out we lost a baby, You're like, first
of all, shit, you didn't know your Laura was pregnant
and then you've lost it.
Speaker 1 (37:46):
Like, it's it's such a big it's a big, heavy subject, heavy.
Speaker 2 (37:50):
Subject, you know, and obviously there's a few people who
were that close to you where you can bring it up.
Like obviously my family, they like we could talk about it,
but because we didn't tell anyone that we would trying,
We didn't tell anyone that Laura was pregnant when we
lost the baby. Yeah, we were just it was just
something that we internalized and so I didn't. I didn't
bring it up with anybody as well, and I was
I didn't want to bring it up and draw attention
(38:11):
to something that I don't know if Laura wanted people
to know about. But I think the biggest surprise is
it is so so common. Yeah, so many people know
about it. Laura spoke about it on Life on Cut
after it happened, like a little while after, and there
was surprising how many people came out and said, oh,
we've also experienced that, because in my head, stupidly, I
(38:32):
thought it was something that was like one in twenty
or like you know, yeah, it's like.
Speaker 1 (38:36):
One and two almost. It's wild. It's wild how big.
And before you have kids, you have no idea about
that stat whatsoever.
Speaker 4 (38:43):
Before you fall pregnant, you have no idea about the stats,
the complications, the variations, the variables, everything involved until you're
actually going through it. But like, looking back, do you
think that if you after it happened the first time,
do you think if that you didn't internalize it so
much then and you were more vocal with it about
closer to you, do you think it would have helped
(39:04):
you with your worries now? Oh?
Speaker 2 (39:07):
No, I don't think it would have helped my worry Now.
I think I think if we did, like Heaven forbid, touch,
would we lose this baby? I know that I would
tell a lot more people. I would be so much
more vocal with it and open with it and not
feel like I was being such a burden in bringing
it up with other people in conversation.
Speaker 4 (39:27):
Yeah, and do you think if you knew that back
then you would have been able to process about it? Oh?
Speaker 2 (39:34):
Yeah, It's like, I'm very fortunate that I haven't had
to deal with a huge amount of trauma in my life,
and that is probably one of the ones that was
like top of the list. The moments where you talk
about it makes it so much easier to make sense
of the whole situation. You know, It's it can be
a dangerous thing just having these internalized thoughts that never
get the chance to have a voice out in the open.
Speaker 4 (39:56):
It needs the oxygen one hundred percent, right, because, like
we're talking, so many people are going through the same
thing but doing it in silence. And then think of
how all those people that go through it don't try
again because they're too scared or haven't had a conversation
with someone like you who's tried again and again and
it's happened again, and then you're willing to go through
(40:18):
that again for the ultimate reward, which is parenthood.
Speaker 1 (40:22):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (40:23):
And I think the message to anyone who has experienced
a miscarriage is that it's not your fault and unfortunately,
for whatever reason, it just wasn't meant to be. So,
I mean, I will as time progresses, I will start
to celebrate it more.
Speaker 1 (40:38):
I hope so. And there's a part of me that goes,
am I an idiot for having a third child? Are
we like the moment? Yes?
Speaker 3 (40:45):
And no.
Speaker 2 (40:46):
The moment we've just come to a point where we
finally kind of got control to a certain degree with parenting.
We feel like we're getting the upper hand.
Speaker 1 (40:54):
The kids understand what you're saying.
Speaker 4 (40:56):
Yes, yes, they might not do what you've said that
you're at a stage now where both girls are at
an age where they understand if you did raise your
voice enough, you could get.
Speaker 1 (41:06):
Some law and order.
Speaker 4 (41:08):
You know.
Speaker 2 (41:08):
I can't begin to tell you how much easier parenting
is when you can communicate with your child and they
can say I'm hungry, i'm cold, I have a saw
a tummy, I have a headache.
Speaker 1 (41:17):
I want a glass of water. That is an amazing
position to be in. And I'm like far out to
get to the point where I've got a little blob
back to a guessing game. The guessing game, I'm like,
ash am I an idiot? No? Okay, great, No, I
don't think you're an idiot. Honestly, not for me. If
you guys have made the decision.
Speaker 2 (41:37):
Obstetrician was like, we came in and the first thing
you said was what the hell are you guys doing?
Speaker 1 (41:46):
You're out.
Speaker 4 (41:47):
You're well and truly going to be outnumbered, which is
something that people warn you about.
Speaker 1 (41:50):
But you just don't know.
Speaker 4 (41:52):
If you're looking at what my life's going to be
like with three and you think that's what makes this
family feel plea, then you haven't done the wrong.
Speaker 2 (42:02):
Actould you know who helped me? Who is Aimes on
the poetic When she was like it's good, yeah, this
is on you, Ames. But when she was like, Ames's
I guess we had on a little while ago. She's
got four kids, and she was like, no, it gets easier,
and I was like, where's Laura?
Speaker 4 (42:18):
No, congratulations and thank you for sharing all of that
with us off the back of that, Matthew, there's a
very important decision that needs to be made and you've
got plenty of time to do that, and that is
what you were going to name this child. Now, there
are I'm not gonna say good and bad names, but
let's face it, there are names that you associate with
(42:39):
bad behave.
Speaker 1 (42:40):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (42:41):
I think everyone grows up and names have a certain
image attached to it based on the kids that.
Speaker 1 (42:48):
You went to school with. Yeah, oh for sure. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (42:52):
And so there are names where, like Laura and I
were going through potential names at the moment and I'm like, well,
we can't call it that because I had one of
those names at my.
Speaker 1 (42:59):
School and that were so naughty. So I thought we
should do like our top three noughty.
Speaker 4 (43:03):
Names, naughty names, Matthew, Okay, all right, So my first
one Billy. Yeah, we used to have a kid at school, Billy.
He's stunk, but also he was such.
Speaker 1 (43:18):
A naughty kid.
Speaker 2 (43:19):
Yeah, Billy's are very naughty, Yeah, very cheeky. For me,
it's more of a it's a j names that start
with jay.
Speaker 1 (43:27):
Oh yeah. So number three for me is gi Ji
is aughty name. Yeah, Okay, I never had a joy
that I can recall. To any guys out there, I apologize.
I don't mean to stuff. You're ill evil those parents
out there being like that was our name for a kid?
(43:48):
Cross that out. Number two? Yeah, Jake, Oh yeah, I
got a couple. Yeah, it's the Jay's.
Speaker 2 (44:00):
Dude, Jesus, Okay, I'm going to throw a girl's name
in the mix. And again, if this is your name
and you're very well behaved, I'm sorry to offend.
Speaker 1 (44:13):
But Evie Eve is it cheeky? Very close to evil? Yes? Right,
suspiciously close. What's your number one? Number one? Which I
think was going to be similar? If it's a boy, Nathan, Nathan.
Speaker 2 (44:32):
I knew and Nathan in school and he was quite nice.
He's my only actually there was there was one nice
and there's one evil difference. My number one, going back
to Jay's, it's the Jay's. You've got to be worried
about Jared.
Speaker 1 (44:47):
Oh my god, it's gonna shivers down my spine.
Speaker 2 (44:52):
If your child is becoming friends with another child called Jared,
just be very careful, have your guard up, be warned,
because that's a naughty. Fucking is a naughty and if
it's not naughty now will be naughty in the future.
Speaker 1 (45:07):
That's a future criminal.
Speaker 2 (45:08):
They cannot fight the naughtiness once they have the tag
of Jared. There's only one path in life that will take.
Speaker 4 (45:15):
Jared's the new Ivan. I'm going to say it, say
that Jared. My lat has are into it. Actually I
like it so yeah. So luckily I don't have to
worry about Jay's for this baby.
Speaker 1 (45:29):
I don't have any names in the mix Jessica, Jessica
and am I just jess It old Jeffica, Jesse Bear
our producer's nicknames. Bella not a fan, although Bella for
sure it's been killed.
Speaker 2 (45:48):
And if you enjoy this episode that's a funny name,
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I'm asking you right now politely subscribe, because that gives
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(46:08):
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Speaker 4 (46:13):
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Speaker 1 (46:18):
If any of that is triggering to you, we'll leave some.
Speaker 4 (46:21):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (46:21):
If you have any questions about the topics every time
of today, yes, hit us up, ask the way and.
Speaker 1 (46:26):
We'll tackle them in the following weeks.
Speaker 2 (46:36):
Two Doting Dads podcast acknowledges the traditional custodians of country
throughout Australia and the connections to land, see and community.
Speaker 4 (46:43):
We pay our respects to their elders past and present
and extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torrestraight Island
to people's today.
You've just done something.
Speaker 2 (00:02):
I've done something which I was going to bring this
up in private, but then I thought we are running late,
need to record this episode.
Speaker 1 (00:10):
Of course, what better time than now. There's no better time.
You've pissed on the floor. I didn't. You did? I
definitely did not. Yes, you're a floor piss up. I
did not. I have great control. You went to the toilet.
How do you know? I don't sit.
Speaker 2 (00:24):
I don't know how you do it, but you managed
to get w wiz on the floor.
Speaker 1 (00:28):
I didn't.
Speaker 2 (00:28):
I stand by one of us, producer Jess, went to
the bathroom, came out and said him over there has
pissed on the floor.
Speaker 1 (00:36):
Dare did not. I did not. I see what I
WII must have had a boner or something.
Speaker 3 (00:42):
I don't know what you're doing in that guilty Welcome.
Speaker 1 (01:01):
Back to two my own webs. I'm trying to do
the intro.
Speaker 4 (01:05):
Bro.
Speaker 1 (01:05):
Sorry, you're not doing this, so I didn't.
Speaker 2 (01:07):
They Welcome back to two Doting Dads. I am Addie
Jay and this is a podcast all about parenting. It
is the good, it is the bad, and the relatable.
And we don't give advice ever at all.
Speaker 4 (01:19):
Except don't piss on the floor at Maddy's house, because
you'll find out.
Speaker 2 (01:22):
It's just I feel like most people would have a
decent amount of respect to not piss on someone else's property.
Speaker 1 (01:31):
Got to get back at you somehow. I don't want to.
Speaker 4 (01:34):
I honestly didn't know I did that.
Speaker 1 (01:37):
That's right.
Speaker 2 (01:38):
We are on holidays as a family. We've gone down
to the house and the house was looking great. You know, Tom,
I builder, who is just amazing. Kids, there's little fingerprints
fucking everywhere, sticky, so sticky.
Speaker 4 (01:55):
Bro, you give them something that's not even sticky, and
all of a sudden they've got fucking sticky.
Speaker 1 (02:00):
It's what are they doing? I think, what are they doing? Science?
Speaker 2 (02:02):
And I'm like, don't touch that, put that down, putting
their feet up on the wall, like just feet, and
also like coloring in. Just everything they do is just
making a mess. And I get it. They're young and
they're living their lives, living their best lives.
Speaker 4 (02:19):
If a child draws on a wall in your house,
what's the course of action in terms of discipline.
Speaker 1 (02:24):
I will beat them to a pulp. I would expect
nothing less.
Speaker 2 (02:27):
That is the fear that's been inflicted on them I'm
yet to do it, Thank heavens for anyone wondering I did.
Not my children, not yet. But there's a lot of
yelling right now. As far as the holidays go, it's
been it's been like a yellow minute.
Speaker 4 (02:41):
We offer talk about school holidays and how or just
holidays with your family in general, and it's like it's
meant to be like really fun, but it just ends
up being fucking nightmarees it's a nightmare.
Speaker 2 (02:51):
I mean Marley, she didn't realize she thought holidays, we're
just weekends. Like she didn't realize that.
Speaker 1 (02:57):
Oh bless.
Speaker 2 (02:58):
I was like, you're on holidays, and she's like, sweet weekends.
And then on Monday she was like, uh, school and
I was like, no, you're on holidays. She's never had
like she's always been a daycare, so she's never had holidays.
Speaker 4 (03:09):
Never had an Oscar thinks the word yesterday means anytime
any day that happened prior.
Speaker 1 (03:17):
I love that.
Speaker 4 (03:18):
So he'll be like, we'll go somewhere that we were
at like a year ago. He'll be like, we were
here yesterday. I was like, what are you talking about.
I'm trying to live with this anxiety that you know.
Speaker 1 (03:33):
Obviously house. Is it going to get lived in? Right?
Speaker 2 (03:35):
It's not museums, I know, but I just everything looks
nicer without kids in it.
Speaker 4 (03:40):
Off for sure, Like a brand new car and you
put a kid in it. Oh, they just ruin everything.
It's like they're carrying a constant bag of rubbish with them.
Speaker 1 (03:52):
It's like, oh, come in the.
Speaker 4 (03:53):
Car, don't let me just get my bag of rubbish.
Speaker 1 (03:56):
It's the worst. So, you know, I'm so glad.
Speaker 2 (03:59):
I agonized of every nook and cranny of that house
just to let my kids destroy it.
Speaker 1 (04:04):
The moment they moved in, They're like, is this eggshell white?
Not anymore? And then I come back booker white?
Speaker 2 (04:12):
What's the come back here? And you're pissing on the
fucking toilet floor seat. Jesus, can't you know?
Speaker 1 (04:18):
Just everywhere I turned, there's no concrete evidence that it
was me. Producer Jazz has photos. She's untrustworthy. You're right,
you're right, just photo Are you taking photos of my piss?
She just threw me a shaker. That means yes, I'm
into it. That's cool, very good, very good.
Speaker 2 (04:38):
I saw a guy on the drive down here by
the way up here. He was in the back of
the car and had his head out the window like
a dog on the highway, just like head out, like
mouth open.
Speaker 3 (04:51):
Maybe he ate something really spicy. I was like, I've
never seen that before.
Speaker 4 (04:55):
Maybe he's fueled by wind, very gassy, very it would
be so.
Speaker 1 (05:04):
Very good. Do you know what I saw?
Speaker 4 (05:05):
Speaking about something pit seat speaking about seeing things while driving.
I don't know if I've ever told you is one
time I was driving out of my grandmother's house, who
lives in Western Sydney.
Speaker 1 (05:15):
And we know Western Sydney.
Speaker 4 (05:17):
No offense, chess, it's pretty dicey, you know.
Speaker 1 (05:23):
No, Actually I love Western Sydney.
Speaker 4 (05:26):
Whoa, heyjeuz I didn't say I didn't like that.
Speaker 2 (05:30):
I'd love to know what portion of our listener is
from Western Sydney. If you are listening and you do
reside in the West of Sydney, please let us know.
Speaker 1 (05:39):
Well, this might be you. If you're listening listening in
the car.
Speaker 4 (05:42):
Perhaps I was at the lights on the way out
west and I look over to someone in their car
and they were smoking an ice pipe.
Speaker 1 (05:50):
What suburb is this? Gilford Classic Guildford.
Speaker 4 (05:54):
Yeah, So if you are listening, enjoy that math The fhetamine.
Speaker 1 (05:59):
Yeah's meth and ice the same thing. Yeah, it is. Yep,
it is great, great spoke, spoken like a true addict. Anyway,
I look over and he's blazing up, just couldn't wait
to get home. I don't know. Maybe he just likes
to live life on the edge, or maybe it's addicted.
Speaker 2 (06:16):
It's a certain like there's a line, isn't it when
you're a meth head, but you do it in private,
But when you're a meth head you do it in public.
You're like you've crossed the line.
Speaker 1 (06:26):
That myth must have been Moorish? You getting back for seconds? Okay,
what do I go for? What do I go for? Hey?
Speaking of substances? Good segue, seg, thank you.
Speaker 4 (06:41):
As you know, obviously goes to primary school much like
Marley and primary schools schools in general, they have a
lot of outside of school our activities, like he just
went off the top of my head, like pizza and
puzzle night, okay, which is usually like Father's Day.
Speaker 1 (06:59):
Right, and I know that puzzle.
Speaker 4 (07:03):
Yeah, it's like it's like after hours, right, so it's
like four o'clock sounds sexual pizza and penises, pizza, pizza
and Dad's penis yeah, okay.
Speaker 1 (07:19):
Let me get back on track.
Speaker 4 (07:20):
Outside of school now, a lot of these things are
alcohol free zones, as you can imagine, because what.
Speaker 2 (07:31):
What no, just imagining you rocking up? Did Pizza and
Puzzle night with the case of beer?
Speaker 1 (07:38):
Yeah? I thought it was pizza puzzle and case of
pizza puzzle And no, no, no, very funny. I just know. Sorry,
I know thought you You're like you sound like annoyed
and surprised. I tried to take my meth pipe with
me again.
Speaker 4 (07:59):
You know they're but they also do events that are
like parents only, like for fundraiser.
Speaker 1 (08:08):
I'm not going to get through these fucking hell only ones.
Let me come to those.
Speaker 4 (08:16):
On three keys and anyway, so the adults only nine.
Speaker 1 (08:24):
Yeah, fucking hell god. Anyway, we went to what they
call a mingle. This story sounds terrible.
Speaker 4 (08:41):
This sounds like a horrible Sorry what happens the adult
only mingles?
Speaker 1 (08:48):
No, this was this was the kids. This was a
there were kids. There were kids on this mingles. Actually
bring one kid.
Speaker 4 (08:58):
Anyway, all these events are alcohol free, and it begs
the question why, okay, outside of school hours this parent.
Speaker 1 (09:06):
Mingle was for I can't get I can't look at you.
I look at the floor, Look at the floor. I
questioned why there's no alcohol?
Speaker 4 (09:13):
And I found out that there used to be alcohol
at these after school events, like the fundraising shit, the parents'
nights or whatever there used to be until trivia night
last year. Apparently all the parents got really lit and
they ended up finding alcohol like bottles around the school.
Speaker 1 (09:38):
What is wrong with people? I think it's really funny.
What's wrong with people? Come on, this is for the kids.
Well they ruined it for all of us. Anyway, we
went to the mingle.
Speaker 4 (09:46):
How drunk were they getting? Apparently they were lit like list.
It was a fundraising trivia end of years.
Speaker 1 (09:52):
And you talk about Western Sydney being bad, the northern
beaches of Sydney a bunch of his heads.
Speaker 4 (09:58):
Yeah yeah, but nothing else to do sink piers at schools,
at the school mingles, at the school mingle. So we
went to the KINDI Mingle, which was not run by
the school all right, it's run by some volunteers and whatever.
And it was like the P and C whatever it
might be.
Speaker 1 (10:15):
And I was like, it would be Friday, whatever it
may be. It's the peens. It's a Friday afternoon it's
the p and C. Okay, the event was, Ah, why
are you going to argue me on the pens? I
don't care about the p and C. I've never heard
of them. Well, the school has a P and C.
The P and C.
Speaker 4 (10:29):
Organized a KINDI parent mingle, so you meet the other
parents because obviously now we've been grouped into classes and
now I'm forced to be friends with people that don't
want to be friends with. Also, all the parents out
there that go to my kids school, I love you.
I have some friends that we all their kids go
to this to the same school, and I thought, I
(10:49):
don't want to go to an alcohol for event on
a Friday, so I took a six pack. But the
difference is with the six pack is I wrapped all
the beers in and in a nappy like a cool No.
Speaker 1 (11:01):
Don't you just look like a fucking weird like a
weirdo sniffing nappies. I don't sniff my beers, bro, I
chuggle them. Are you hiding a beer in a nappy? Yeah?
Like that looks weird. Like you're better off just going
to the toilet.
Speaker 4 (11:16):
That's way creepy because the people think I'm doing some
illicit drugs in there.
Speaker 2 (11:19):
Don't look any better walking around with like four nappies
in your hand. A nappy guy, how do you assume
I only had four? No one would be able to
suspect it.
Speaker 3 (11:27):
What do we got?
Speaker 1 (11:27):
That is one of the dumbest things I have ever seen.
Speaker 4 (11:31):
Well, the jokes on you because I got away with it.
When we were in the cool corner, people were coming
over again, what's going on over here? I'm like, nappy
beer can?
Speaker 1 (11:38):
I make a suggestion.
Speaker 2 (11:40):
You're better off getting a coke can and getting a
tolley and pouring a tolly into the coke can.
Speaker 1 (11:46):
Too much work. You just look weird that you're holding
a dirty nappy. That's funny. That's part of the joke.
But like, don't question me.
Speaker 4 (11:52):
It works. Sorry, it worked up until we were leaving
and I had to empty the bag full of beer
cans into the recycling being, which is full of like, so,
what do you do drink can?
Speaker 1 (12:03):
What do you do with the nappies? Oh, they're in
there too. I'm taking a stand. April is a lucky lady.
Speaker 4 (12:08):
If they're going to force me to be friends with people,
then I'm going to be drinking. Are your events not
alcohol free or do you go to them?
Speaker 1 (12:16):
We haven't been to I don't know. Wow, we haven't
had any. Actually we had one wrap up party, not
wrap up party, rap up. We had one like welcome
party for the kindie okay, after hours on a Friday,
and it was kids too. Kids went.
Speaker 2 (12:29):
I was down the coast so I wasn't there. Do
you know if it was our colfer it I don't know.
Speaker 1 (12:34):
I will ask for you.
Speaker 4 (12:35):
I think if you do it look as a school okay,
I get it inside school hours. No not rocking up
to a midday assembly, and least anyone someone would be
if you have But like I think, if you're okay,
hey Friday afternoon, after school hours.
Speaker 1 (12:52):
You should have a tipple. You should be allowed to
have a tipple. I'm not saying get like hammered. I
had like eight beers, but that's not the point. That's
I can. I can handle it. And then a bit
of math. But I think if you.
Speaker 2 (13:07):
Have to say you're joking, because people might oh shit, yeah, sorry,
might not know that you're not being I'm not a
math head yet, but I think that they should be.
Speaker 1 (13:19):
You should be able to have a tipple. Yeah, I
agree with that. Okay, but well done. Well done for
your ingenuity. I thought that was groundbreaking.
Speaker 4 (13:27):
You are.
Speaker 1 (13:27):
You're a very magiv. I'm the magiver of beer drinking.
Oh yeah, next time I'll come up with something a
little bit more. I'll just strap it to a child.
I'll be like, let me have a sip. Hey, you
did something before I pisced on the floor. I get it. No,
not that one. You found something that you shouldn't have.
(13:48):
It's a photo of ultrasound because we're having a baby.
Speaker 4 (13:52):
Whoa, But I kind of already knew who. I just
tell how I tried to pour your lovely wife, Laura. Congratulations.
Speaker 1 (14:05):
By the way, I'm holding photo of a young fetus,
a beautiful Johnson fetus. Is it a boy or a girl?
We don't know. I didn't shock right now.
Speaker 4 (14:20):
I know I tried to pour Laura a drink when
we when you return from the jungle, and that drink
was denied, and I had a suspicion. I had suspicions.
I also haven't seen Laura in a while. Also, yeah,
that's probably about it. And I know there's been talk
(14:41):
about it, and I just knew. Also, someone might have
spilled the beans.
Speaker 1 (14:45):
Who who? I'm not telling me I know, because I
will get in trouble. Just tell me I forced it
out of someone. Who give me some ellie? Yeah? Did
you have her against the wall? Literally that war?
Speaker 4 (15:00):
I have her against that wall right there? Because I
said to Laura, I was like, hey, I brought some
margaritas the can and it's look one can, it's like
two and a half standard drinks. Like I'm trying to
get lit here. Yeah, And I was like, do you
want to go halves? And she was like yeah, yeah, yeah,
very tentative. And I was and I look over your
mum and she was like.
Speaker 1 (15:19):
I was like, okay, she's signaling like, don't do that.
She's so Because she was so, I was like, do
you know what I did? After that?
Speaker 4 (15:32):
I looked at her and I was like, come here,
and she was like she knew a white straightaway that
I was going to crack this safe immediately.
Speaker 1 (15:40):
And I was like, you better tell me right what's gone?
What did she say? She's a terrible liar And she
was like, no, I can't.
Speaker 4 (15:50):
I can't tell me. That's exactly what she sounds like.
I could never I could never tell you and I
was like, what are we going to do. Is I'm
going to ask you a question, You're going to nod
your head. And I was like, is Laura pregnant?
Speaker 1 (16:01):
And she was like yeah. I was wondering where she
got those bruises from. Sorry about that. And then I
was like I was like, fucking okay, all right, I
know it and I know it now. And she was like, oh,
don't tell them.
Speaker 4 (16:14):
I told you they beat me, so congratulations. I already knew,
but congratulations, this is going to ruin us financially.
Speaker 1 (16:25):
So we got give me a look at this baby.
Speaker 4 (16:28):
When are we?
Speaker 1 (16:29):
Okay? Hang on November? No, sooner October October? Baby, I
was close. It's late October there, right, No, what it's in.
Speaker 2 (16:38):
Mid We were trying before I went into the jungle,
just in case you didn't come back. The plan was
we said this year twenty twenty five, if we are
going to have a third, this will be the year
that it happens. Because I'm conscious that Marley and Lola
really close together. They're about eighteen months Nowlas just turned four,
(17:01):
and I was like, if it doesn't happen this year,
you know, it's a big gap. It's a big gap.
Speaker 1 (17:05):
Also, it's like accidental gap, you know. We were like, oh,
it must have been an Actually it's like it's.
Speaker 2 (17:10):
A bit of double edged sword in that great because Marley,
I guess, the older she comes, the older she turns,
the more capable she is as a second third parent
the main parent, which is great. But then we're like,
we don't want you with that third child to still
be friends with Marley and Lola.
Speaker 1 (17:28):
And the third child always gets forgotten about it.
Speaker 2 (17:30):
Like they do, don't they You're the thing, Oh yeah,
like you know exactly how how I turned out. But
we said we're going to try, and we're kind of
even said, we're like, if it doesn't happen before the jungle,
like by the time I come back, it's going to
be February, you know. And they're like, you know, for
those who don't know, it takes nine months for a
baby to grow in a woman's body. Then we're like, oh,
(17:51):
that's pushing in the two thousand and twenty six.
Speaker 4 (17:54):
Yeah, and we're kind of like, I have a summer baby,
like immediate, like you know, no October, it's still it's close.
Speaker 2 (18:02):
But so and I said to Laura, if I make
it to the end of the jungle, and I was like,
fucking tell me, like if if you get if you'll
find out you're pregnant whilst I'm away when you come
on the show, Like tell me, right. So then obviously
she didn't tell me, and then I kind of didn't.
It wasn't like front of mine. But we came back
from the jungle and I was like, oh, I guess
(18:26):
you're not pregnant, and she was like nah, I was
thinking about it and probably like not the wisest thing
for us to do, right We're in a really good
position right now.
Speaker 1 (18:34):
And I was like, yeah, do you know what you know?
Speaker 2 (18:37):
I was like, you're probably right, Like what were we thinking?
Trying to have a third Man's pretty crazy? And then
and then there's a video. I'm assuming by the time
this comes out, this video will be posted. But Laura
then she goes, oh, someone gave me a scratchy and
you scratch it. And I was like, oh, a little
scratch scratchy. Sure, So I'm scratching it. And it was
(19:00):
a really bad quality scratchy, like it was at a
coin And as I was scratching off the top layer,
it would then take that first layer off and then
when you went to reveal like what's printed underneath, it
was taking the print off as well, and.
Speaker 4 (19:15):
I was like, this is.
Speaker 1 (19:18):
I was like, and I was.
Speaker 2 (19:19):
It was one of those hard ones where I was
trying to figure it out, like it was like match
four of these icons, and if you get two of
this one, it means you get that one on the
first right, which underneath that one there.
Speaker 1 (19:27):
Is that how you get pregnant. Do the scratchy. So
I'm scratching and I'm like, this is shit, throw it
out and then she's like, keep on scratching, and then
you scratch it.
Speaker 2 (19:39):
It was like fifteen icons and then then like a
little tiny bottom right one it said you're having a baby,
and I was like, where's the money? And then I
was like I was very confused, and also I was
in the mindset of like do we want to have
a third?
Speaker 1 (19:54):
Yeah? You were like talking yourself out of it.
Speaker 2 (19:56):
We were straddling both sides of the party. Nice I
was now I'm got visuals.
Speaker 1 (20:03):
One hand.
Speaker 2 (20:03):
We were like, it'll be amazing to have three kids.
You know, I grew up was one of five. Imagine
when we're older having a house full of three children
and their partner's beautiful. But then on the other hand,
I'm like, we're kind of like out of the trenches.
Speaker 4 (20:16):
Now, yeah, you like you're talking now. I don't want
to sound you're talking now. Back to bassin there.
Speaker 2 (20:23):
Back to we don't we don't use nappies in the
house anymore. We don't use the pram anymore.
Speaker 4 (20:28):
Yeah, my pram is covered in cobwebs. I looked at
it the other day and it was looking back at
me like shut up, yeah, where now. I spoke to
someone who has a newborn, and I was like, what's
that like?
Speaker 1 (20:42):
It sucks. It's I've forgotten. I've forgotten all those years
of what it's what it's like having a third kid.
I knew you would. I knew it was going to happen.
I just did. I thought maybe next year.
Speaker 2 (20:56):
I also when when I found out in that moment
when we had the scratchyet, I think we were at
what we were maybe like twelve weeks, eleven weeks, so
we have it. We didn't even have like the big tests.
So then I also was conscious of like, you know,
I don't want to it's very early days. I don't
want to celebrate it and be like, we're having a
kid because we've our cycle. When I say hours, Laura's
(21:19):
we've had first child was a miscarriage. Then Laura was
pregnant with Marley. Then after Miley was born, she got
pregnant again. We lost that child at around twelve weeks shit,
and then we had Lala. So you know, I'm kind
of looking at the roadmap of which we just come
down and I'm like, well, we're kind of due for
another miscarriage, so.
Speaker 1 (21:39):
How many weeks are we now? So we are currently
because I'm equally as involved in this together, Laura is
currently I've lost count. She's fourteen or fifteen weeks. Wow.
Speaker 2 (21:51):
So yeah, So we went and had went, had the
few tests done, but there's a lot of I thought
there was just one test at twelve weeks.
Speaker 1 (21:59):
I think just opt in for a few different there's
a few different ones, and I was kind of waiting
for the bad news, like for something to go wrong,
and I was like excited at the moment, but then
I was like, you know, until where I don't know,
I guess like you're holding the baby in your hand, Yeah,
exactly exactly.
Speaker 2 (22:16):
So then I was every test I was kind of
waiting and they're you know, taking all the measurements and
like the heartbeat and everything else, just waiting for something
to go wrong.
Speaker 1 (22:25):
It was very weird.
Speaker 2 (22:27):
I don't know if you recall ash when you go
in excuse my ignorance here ultrasound. Oh I got sea sick.
That's right, you passed out. But there was a student
doctor who was in the room. He was very good looking,
very good looking, and like the ultrasound. It's not that invasive,
you know, if anyone's well, but you have one where
(22:50):
they like, you know, you pull your pants down quite
a bit and your belly is exposed and they scan it.
Then they have the one that's like a big old
banana size like instrument, and I was in the chair
in the corner and it felt like is it called
the cock chair?
Speaker 1 (23:11):
Yeah, you were cocked. My guy, a good looking doctor
inserted something into your wife.
Speaker 2 (23:19):
They're good looking doctor did the optra sound over the belly,
and then they were like, we'll be back in one second.
And then Laura was like, I wonder if he's going
to do like the next part, which is like the
banana rocket, And I was like, hope.
Speaker 1 (23:30):
So I'm joking popcorn.
Speaker 2 (23:34):
Yeah, I was.
Speaker 1 (23:35):
Let me get the tissues out, beautiful.
Speaker 2 (23:40):
He didn't come back. He didn't come back. We had
the lovely older doctor female do that part.
Speaker 1 (23:49):
Laura was like, thank god it wasn't him. He was gorgeous,
gorgeous young doctor. Anyway.
Speaker 2 (23:55):
Here, So we're still where we're fifteen weeks. We've had all,
like all the major tests done. Everything's looking good and
everything's tracking nicely.
Speaker 1 (24:06):
And with the gender, you're not going to tell anyone
of this. The big question was big question was Marley
and Lola.
Speaker 2 (24:13):
We found out at birth the sex, and I was like,
this is great, like it's lovely. But first child, I
was happy with whatever. Second child, I thought everyone else
thought that Lola was going to be a boy, so
I just had it in my mind that it was
going to be a boy. So there was just a
split second. But like gender surprise where you're like, oh,
(24:33):
I wasn't expecting that. It's like you're thinking you're going
to get a chocolate cake and you got a sponge.
A sponge is still great. I'll eat a sponge, no
questions asked. But at the same time, I just was
expecting a chocolate cake and mudcake. Do you know what
I'm saying, You're picking up what I'm putting down.
Speaker 1 (24:45):
I am, And now I'm just hungry.
Speaker 2 (24:49):
And so I just said to Laura, like, I want
to go into birth because it's all about me.
Speaker 1 (24:55):
I'd like to know. And I think childbirth is beautiful.
Speaker 2 (24:59):
Enough of the moment that you don't need it to
be at another like added level of surprise. But Laura
was like, how amazing. You don't get many surprises in
life for what reason?
Speaker 1 (25:08):
Like we get what's the yeah, yeah, yeah, what's the right?
Speaker 2 (25:10):
And I was like, well, let's let's pad this out.
We can have a surprise now, and then childbirth is
still great. It's not like you're not going to enjoy
childbirth because you know the sex of your child.
Speaker 1 (25:18):
You're still going to enjoy it. It's going to be
the sexy child is going to be the sexuy child
for the rest of his life. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (25:22):
So well, so I was like, let's find out prior
so a bit of debating, I won nice because you
know this is we are not going for a fourth Yeah,
I think we're.
Speaker 1 (25:33):
You know, Laura's forty, she's thirty nine, she's young and fertile.
She's not, well, she's a geriatric.
Speaker 4 (25:41):
She's not, she's medically it's just thirty nine medically, yeah, yeah,
old of those medically medical medically is like we're saying
she's geriatric in afford it.
Speaker 1 (25:51):
It's like imob.
Speaker 4 (25:52):
Technically called to the B and I scale how old
are these thinks? They're not wrong, that's mean, but geriatric
at forty?
Speaker 1 (25:59):
What for pregnancy? For pregnant? I was going to say,
when was this scientific record kept from the forties.
Speaker 3 (26:06):
It's just when it comes to pregnancy, it's very offensive.
That is offensive. I'm offended for her. And she's thirty nine?
Speaker 1 (26:13):
Is she she's thirty nine?
Speaker 4 (26:15):
Yeah, which is almost forty. Sorry, what is the new thirty? Anyway, congratulations,
that's amazing, Thank you very much. Like I said, I
knew it was coming. I didn't know it was coming
this early, and I also was waiting for you to
tell me because I knew. And then also I found
that over there and I walked in and I said,
(26:37):
do you have something to tell me? And you gave
me this look like like no, and I was like,
oh no, embracing for the worst. So I'm I'm glad
it's the best, the best result, Thank you very much.
Speaker 2 (26:49):
And so I didn't tell you sooner, No that I
wanted to surprise you on the pot, but fucking that
was harder than I thought, because you are a detective
I am.
Speaker 4 (26:57):
Do you know I lived next door to a good
friend of mine a while ago across the hall, and
I also picked twice when she was pregnant without them
before they told us i'd have a gift.
Speaker 1 (27:10):
Jess is not pregnant gift. That's a gift. Point someone out.
This might sound weird, but I don't have a kink
with pregnant women. Oh yeah, you don't.
Speaker 2 (27:23):
But I find Laura at the moment, she's popping a
lot more than the previous pregnancies.
Speaker 1 (27:30):
Wait normally works. She also doesn't answer my calls.
Speaker 2 (27:34):
She's been avoiding your bellies popped like I think with Marley,
she didn't pop right until the final trimester. Whereas now
that belly's out and Laura's like, oh, I just feel
so fat. I hate it, And I'm like, damn girl,
I'm like, whoh ring that belly?
Speaker 1 (27:52):
I love it.
Speaker 4 (27:54):
Get the vitamin E cream out and rather it's just like,
because you know it helps the trench marks right.
Speaker 1 (28:01):
Get in there, man, deep in there, you know, like
all over, just the belly, just a belly. Feet. Work
on the feet. Nah, that Laura has dry feet. I'm
not a foot guy, if I'm honest. The hands of
(28:23):
the legs.
Speaker 3 (28:24):
Okay, well, I'm gonna I look forward to lubing Laura
luber ride with a vitamin E cream or some baby oil,
slipping slider.
Speaker 1 (28:33):
I find a horse what what do you mean?
Speaker 4 (28:38):
Gymnastics and there's that thing they get get all handsy
and they they fling their legs around.
Speaker 3 (28:43):
That's a I'm going to ride Laura like a pommel horse.
You're ready, She's going to be the apparatus. I hope
she's ready.
Speaker 1 (28:50):
She would be ready.
Speaker 2 (28:52):
There is no other moment when I find Laura more
attractive than when she's pregnant.
Speaker 4 (28:57):
You've got to kink my guy. I mean, get my
list of pregnant women up here. I've got a folder.
Speaker 1 (29:04):
I just I don't know, it's beautiful. Keep my hands
off that. I can't wait for my for you page
to just be pregnant. Yeah, we're also. I haven't celebrated it.
Speaker 2 (29:20):
Really. I have moments where I'm like, oh, wow, you know,
what's it gonna try to envision having a newborn baby
in the house and I'm trying to imagine it at
the same time. Every time I start to imagine it,
I put the handbreak up because I'm like, I know,
I don't wanna.
Speaker 4 (29:36):
Is it because of you put your handbreak up because
you don't want to celebrate in case something happened.
Speaker 1 (29:41):
Is that what I'm picking up?
Speaker 2 (29:42):
Yeah, because we've been down that road a number of times,
and especially like the the first time Laura was pregnant,
which is obviously each pregnancy is special, but the very
first time, Like, there is no greater change in your
life as an adult from when you go from no
kids to having kids, and so that first one is
the biggest moment of all, I think, And that first
(30:04):
one is you know, you, that's when I don't know
what you were like, but I was, you know, I
was spending every second imagining like, oh my god, what
is it going to be like being a parent, Like
this is actually going to happen. And then when that's
taken away from you, you know, there's no greater emotional
whiplash than having a miscarriage.
Speaker 4 (30:25):
Yeah, and I haven't thankfully I haven't had to experience that.
But also I think like what we do on this
pot is we do practice. We do preach a little
bit is like don't don't go through all that stuff alone,
like don't feel that you can't celebrate your wins.
Speaker 2 (30:43):
Yeah, And I think I think as as we get closer,
because in my mind, we're still like at the beginning
of still of the of the pregnancy, and even like
when Laura was pregnant with Mali and pregnant with Lola,
there was there was lots of times throughout where we
were super anxious because we're just waiting for something to
go wrong, and you have little moments where baby doesn't
(31:04):
move that much, and you might have one or two
day period where previously baby was really active and now
it's not, and so you just, you know, like you're
just waiting for those signs that something might be going wrong.
And it's so hard because you know, when you do
experience a miscarriage, like wasn't as if Laura did anything wrong.
You know, it's not as if she like behaves in
(31:25):
a certain way which encouraged a miscarriage to happen.
Speaker 1 (31:28):
It's just, unfortunately, just part of life.
Speaker 2 (31:31):
It wasn't meant to be just happened, and so you
just you just got to be this passenger on the
journey and just hope and pray that you know, it's
going to turn out all right.
Speaker 4 (31:40):
Fortunately I haven't had to experience that feeling of a miscarriage,
but when it does happen, what sort of feelings come
to the surface.
Speaker 2 (31:49):
I think the first time it happened, we were overseas
and Laura experienced a little bit of bleeding, and that
bleeding progress, it got a little bit heavier, and I
remember her saying to me, like, oh, like, there's a
lot of blood here, and you know, you instantly you
realize it's not a good sign, and there's not a
(32:13):
whole lot you can do, Like you just have to
like a you're kind of hoping that the bleeding stops,
and then you go to the doctors, you get scans done,
and you know, you're kind of just hoping, hoping that
you get good news. And I think I I think
(32:33):
I was preparing myself for the bad news. There was
so much bleeding over a longer period of time, so
I kind of thought to myself, like my.
Speaker 1 (32:41):
Intuition was that this is really not good and do
they give you a reason? There's no reason.
Speaker 2 (32:47):
So we found out we had scans done, there was
no longer a heartbeat, so we knew that we had
lost the baby. And there's not the hardest thing is
there's not like a specific reason.
Speaker 4 (32:58):
You know.
Speaker 2 (32:58):
It's not like they say, because you did X, we
lost the baby, you know, which almost would be easier to.
Speaker 1 (33:06):
Stomach because you know what to do not to do
next time. Yeah, that's it exactly if it was that,
But it's not because you know, I remember for Laura,
her biggest thought was why I've done something to make
this pregnancy when she hasn't, not at all.
Speaker 2 (33:23):
Yeah, And like that, the biggest bit of communication was
to Laura that this is not your fault, Like you
haven't caused this. You know, there's nothing wrong with you
because obviously you're carrying the baby. And she's like, well,
maybe I'm not a good carrier. Yeah, maybe there's something
wrong with my body that means that I'm not going
to be able to carry a baby. And like Laura
was so worried that it was something that she had
(33:45):
done her there's something that was wrong with her.
Speaker 1 (33:47):
So you're trying to like trying to.
Speaker 2 (33:49):
Communicate and reassure her that like she hasn't done anything
wrong here. The best way that I could digest the
situation is that you kind of think like it was
always going to happen this way, and they they can
test for level of hormones and sometimes like the more
hormones you have is a good sign.
Speaker 1 (34:08):
But my mum told me this.
Speaker 2 (34:11):
She just said that sometimes the body just has to
do a test run and there's no like medical backing
for this. I think it was just an easy way
of my body. It was an easy way for me
to kind of see the situation from the point of
view that it was just body making sure that everything
was where it needed to be to prepare for the
one that was going to be the one and so
(34:33):
but yeah, and afterwards, you kind of think, from my perspective,
you know, I was obviously upset because that baby that
I was imagining was gone. It was you know, it
was never going to be. And then you can't help
it think like what could have been, Like what could
have been that little baby if it had made it,
(34:54):
and you can't help it think about that outcome.
Speaker 1 (34:57):
But then as well, for law.
Speaker 2 (35:00):
She's dealing with the emotional distress of a miscarriage, but
in the physical side as well, you know, it's really uncomfortable.
Speaker 4 (35:08):
You know.
Speaker 2 (35:08):
It's I'm lucky that for a guy, you know, I
could go for a run and try and get my
mind off things, whereas doorphins and totally do something to
distract myself. But for a woman, you know, they're dealing
with it like every second of the day. Like physically
it hurts as well. So it's it's there's a constant
(35:30):
reminder of what they're experiencing, so they don't have the
ability to switch off from it.
Speaker 1 (35:35):
For your first one, what point how far along?
Speaker 4 (35:38):
I think we're about twelve weeks, Okay, so it can
happen and figure my ignorance again, it can happen in
different circums a different times, right.
Speaker 2 (35:48):
Yeah, it's obviously a higher risk of miscarriage earlier on. Yeah,
and so there's kind of that reassurance in my mind,
like now I'm like, okay, Well, every every week that
we don't have any issue is a week that we're
kind of like, not the clear, but we're kind of
itching towards being in a place where we don't have
to worry every day. About it and as hard as well,
(36:11):
because when you're in the first twelve weeks, we've been
conditioned not to tell people.
Speaker 1 (36:17):
Yeah, for sure.
Speaker 2 (36:18):
And I remember mates who would be like eight weeks
pregnant and they would tell people that. I'd be like,
what are you doing, Like you can't you shouldn't be
telling people, Whereas I actually think now it's really stupid.
I think whoever said you shouldn't tell anyone before twelve
we look back at that, you're like, tell everyone.
Speaker 4 (36:34):
Because it's a thing as well, Like when I was saying,
like I was trying to find the words where it's like, yeah, okay,
you're not going to be celebrating because you've got this
fear still, which it's completely normal. But then also it's like,
why will suffer alone with it totally because you're already
I mean, for Laura in the first instance that happened,
You've got the physical side of it. You mentioned the
(36:56):
mental side of it, and also the self worth side
of it as well. But then also it's like like
I can only and it's going to lead me into
my next question. I can only really talk to Matt
about this. But my next question is if we're all
out here talking about it. As someone who's close to
Laura other than you, how do you think that they
could have supported.
Speaker 2 (37:15):
It's hard because you know, if someone is in the
early stages of pregnancy, unless you'r ash Wicks where you're
very dialed into being able to guess it, no one's
going to know. And so it's it's a really heavy
topic to bring up with someone who doesn't know what
you're going through. You know, if in that moment after
it had happened, and someone asked me a question of hey, Matt,
(37:36):
how are you, if you respond and go, well, we
just found out we lost a baby, You're like, first
of all, shit, you didn't know your Laura was pregnant
and then you've lost it.
Speaker 1 (37:46):
Like, it's it's such a big it's a big, heavy subject, heavy.
Speaker 2 (37:50):
Subject, you know, and obviously there's a few people who
were that close to you where you can bring it up.
Like obviously my family, they like we could talk about it,
but because we didn't tell anyone that we would trying,
We didn't tell anyone that Laura was pregnant when we
lost the baby. Yeah, we were just it was just
something that we internalized and so I didn't. I didn't
bring it up with anybody as well, and I was
I didn't want to bring it up and draw attention
(38:11):
to something that I don't know if Laura wanted people
to know about. But I think the biggest surprise is
it is so so common. Yeah, so many people know
about it. Laura spoke about it on Life on Cut
after it happened, like a little while after, and there
was surprising how many people came out and said, oh,
we've also experienced that, because in my head, stupidly, I
(38:32):
thought it was something that was like one in twenty
or like you know, yeah, it's like.
Speaker 1 (38:36):
One and two almost. It's wild. It's wild how big.
And before you have kids, you have no idea about
that stat whatsoever.
Speaker 4 (38:43):
Before you fall pregnant, you have no idea about the stats,
the complications, the variations, the variables, everything involved until you're
actually going through it. But like, looking back, do you
think that if you after it happened the first time,
do you think if that you didn't internalize it so
much then and you were more vocal with it about
closer to you, do you think it would have helped
(39:04):
you with your worries now? Oh?
Speaker 2 (39:07):
No, I don't think it would have helped my worry Now.
I think I think if we did, like Heaven forbid, touch,
would we lose this baby? I know that I would
tell a lot more people. I would be so much
more vocal with it and open with it and not
feel like I was being such a burden in bringing
it up with other people in conversation.
Speaker 4 (39:27):
Yeah, and do you think if you knew that back
then you would have been able to process about it? Oh?
Speaker 2 (39:34):
Yeah, It's like, I'm very fortunate that I haven't had
to deal with a huge amount of trauma in my life,
and that is probably one of the ones that was
like top of the list. The moments where you talk
about it makes it so much easier to make sense
of the whole situation. You know, It's it can be
a dangerous thing just having these internalized thoughts that never
get the chance to have a voice out in the open.
Speaker 4 (39:56):
It needs the oxygen one hundred percent, right, because, like
we're talking, so many people are going through the same
thing but doing it in silence. And then think of
how all those people that go through it don't try
again because they're too scared or haven't had a conversation
with someone like you who's tried again and again and
it's happened again, and then you're willing to go through
(40:18):
that again for the ultimate reward, which is parenthood.
Speaker 1 (40:22):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (40:23):
And I think the message to anyone who has experienced
a miscarriage is that it's not your fault and unfortunately,
for whatever reason, it just wasn't meant to be. So,
I mean, I will as time progresses, I will start
to celebrate it more.
Speaker 1 (40:38):
I hope so. And there's a part of me that goes,
am I an idiot for having a third child? Are
we like the moment? Yes?
Speaker 3 (40:45):
And no.
Speaker 2 (40:46):
The moment we've just come to a point where we
finally kind of got control to a certain degree with parenting.
We feel like we're getting the upper hand.
Speaker 1 (40:54):
The kids understand what you're saying.
Speaker 4 (40:56):
Yes, yes, they might not do what you've said that
you're at a stage now where both girls are at
an age where they understand if you did raise your
voice enough, you could get.
Speaker 1 (41:06):
Some law and order.
Speaker 4 (41:08):
You know.
Speaker 2 (41:08):
I can't begin to tell you how much easier parenting
is when you can communicate with your child and they
can say I'm hungry, i'm cold, I have a saw
a tummy, I have a headache.
Speaker 1 (41:17):
I want a glass of water. That is an amazing
position to be in. And I'm like far out to
get to the point where I've got a little blob
back to a guessing game. The guessing game, I'm like,
ash am I an idiot? No? Okay, great, No, I
don't think you're an idiot. Honestly, not for me. If
you guys have made the decision.
Speaker 2 (41:37):
Obstetrician was like, we came in and the first thing
you said was what the hell are you guys doing?
Speaker 1 (41:46):
You're out.
Speaker 4 (41:47):
You're well and truly going to be outnumbered, which is
something that people warn you about.
Speaker 1 (41:50):
But you just don't know.
Speaker 4 (41:52):
If you're looking at what my life's going to be
like with three and you think that's what makes this
family feel plea, then you haven't done the wrong.
Speaker 2 (42:02):
Actould you know who helped me? Who is Aimes on
the poetic When she was like it's good, yeah, this
is on you, Ames. But when she was like, Ames's
I guess we had on a little while ago. She's
got four kids, and she was like, no, it gets easier,
and I was like, where's Laura?
Speaker 4 (42:18):
No, congratulations and thank you for sharing all of that
with us off the back of that, Matthew, there's a
very important decision that needs to be made and you've
got plenty of time to do that, and that is
what you were going to name this child. Now, there
are I'm not gonna say good and bad names, but
let's face it, there are names that you associate with
(42:39):
bad behave.
Speaker 1 (42:40):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (42:41):
I think everyone grows up and names have a certain
image attached to it based on the kids that.
Speaker 1 (42:48):
You went to school with. Yeah, oh for sure. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (42:52):
And so there are names where, like Laura and I
were going through potential names at the moment and I'm like, well,
we can't call it that because I had one of
those names at my.
Speaker 1 (42:59):
School and that were so naughty. So I thought we
should do like our top three noughty.
Speaker 4 (43:03):
Names, naughty names, Matthew, Okay, all right, So my first
one Billy. Yeah, we used to have a kid at school, Billy.
He's stunk, but also he was such.
Speaker 1 (43:18):
A naughty kid.
Speaker 2 (43:19):
Yeah, Billy's are very naughty, Yeah, very cheeky. For me,
it's more of a it's a j names that start
with jay.
Speaker 1 (43:27):
Oh yeah. So number three for me is gi Ji
is aughty name. Yeah, Okay, I never had a joy
that I can recall. To any guys out there, I apologize.
I don't mean to stuff. You're ill evil those parents
out there being like that was our name for a kid?
(43:48):
Cross that out. Number two? Yeah, Jake, Oh yeah, I
got a couple. Yeah, it's the Jay's.
Speaker 2 (44:00):
Dude, Jesus, Okay, I'm going to throw a girl's name
in the mix. And again, if this is your name
and you're very well behaved, I'm sorry to offend.
Speaker 1 (44:13):
But Evie Eve is it cheeky? Very close to evil? Yes? Right,
suspiciously close. What's your number one? Number one? Which I
think was going to be similar? If it's a boy, Nathan, Nathan.
Speaker 2 (44:32):
I knew and Nathan in school and he was quite nice.
He's my only actually there was there was one nice
and there's one evil difference. My number one, going back
to Jay's, it's the Jay's. You've got to be worried
about Jared.
Speaker 1 (44:47):
Oh my god, it's gonna shivers down my spine.
Speaker 2 (44:52):
If your child is becoming friends with another child called Jared,
just be very careful, have your guard up, be warned,
because that's a naughty. Fucking is a naughty and if
it's not naughty now will be naughty in the future.
Speaker 1 (45:07):
That's a future criminal.
Speaker 2 (45:08):
They cannot fight the naughtiness once they have the tag
of Jared. There's only one path in life that will take.
Speaker 4 (45:15):
Jared's the new Ivan. I'm going to say it, say
that Jared. My lat has are into it. Actually I
like it so yeah. So luckily I don't have to
worry about Jay's for this baby.
Speaker 1 (45:29):
I don't have any names in the mix Jessica, Jessica
and am I just jess It old Jeffica, Jesse Bear
our producer's nicknames. Bella not a fan, although Bella for
sure it's been killed.
Speaker 2 (45:48):
And if you enjoy this episode that's a funny name,
you can please subscribe. We have a lot of people
who listen to this episode, any episode from Two d Dads,
and they don't subscribe to the podcast. Please, yes, please,
I'm asking you right now politely subscribe, because that gives
us the fuel we keep coming back and doing his
(46:08):
episodes every single week, and also give us a couple
of reviews if starts.
Speaker 4 (46:13):
We'll join us on social Two Doting Dads Instagram, TikTok,
and the Facebook.
Speaker 1 (46:18):
If any of that is triggering to you, we'll leave some.
Speaker 4 (46:21):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (46:21):
If you have any questions about the topics every time
of today, yes, hit us up, ask the way and.
Speaker 1 (46:26):
We'll tackle them in the following weeks.
Speaker 2 (46:36):
Two Doting Dads podcast acknowledges the traditional custodians of country
throughout Australia and the connections to land, see and community.
Speaker 4 (46:43):
We pay our respects to their elders past and present
and extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torrestraight Island
to people's today.
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