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October 19, 2025 51 mins

Welcome back to ask uncut where we unpack your deep and burning questions!
Keeshia had a bit of a nightmare commute to work this morning and it led to her disclosing some of our BTS secrets. We somehow ended up speaking about trigger warnings and the research that suggests they’re not as useful as we have been led to believe.

Vibes for the week:
Keeshia - Emily Henry “Great Big Beautiful Life” 
Britt - @parkergetajob 

Then we jump into your questions!

THINKING ABOUT MAKING A SEX TAPE FOR MY BF
My partner and I are thinking about making a sex tape. He is FIFO week on week off swings. We can’t really talk on the phone or FaceTime. Because of his job he is around people all the time and sleeps in a swag with everyone else around him so people would hear if I call him for sexy time. I trust him and don’t have any fears that he will show anyone or anything bad will happen. However, am I being stupid because things live on the internet forever and it could always get out somehow. The person you date if not the same person you break up with, maybe it does get out one day. Do I do it or not? Also have either of you ever done it? I love you girls so much and couldn’t think of anyone else I could ask this question to.

 

HOW TO DISCUSS FINANCES/DEFACTCO WITH NEW BF - I EARN MUCH MORE
I’ve been seeing a guy for about 5-6 months. Everything is going great and he is a walking green flag. I’m starting to feel myself get a bit more invested but still not 100%. My problem is a financial one. I have a relatively successful business (I’m talking 7 figures) which he is aware of. I understand that there will come a time where we have to discuss what this looks like going forward and when we are classed as a de facto relationship, how finances will look. 
I know that there are some criteria that have to be met before being classed as a de facto relationship and what he may be entitled to, should we continue on this steady path. In my opinion, everything that I have earnt before him in my business and property purchases, is considered my own and I worry that he could be entitled to that when we are considered de facto (not that I think he would take anything from me, but you never know)! The thing is, I’m unsure of when I should broach this topic with him. Part of me wants to discuss it now so I know we are on the same page, rather than getting another 1-2 years in and he is unhappy about it. If he’s unhappy about it, that’s a big red flag to me. Is it worth having this conversation sooner rather than later, and if so, how would you go about discussing it ? We are quite open with everything else and we each know what the other owns and salaries etc. He also partially owns a property and is on a six figure salary.

 

MY DAUGHTER HAD A SLEEPOVER WITH A STRANGER WITHOUT US KNOWING
I'm married with a 6 year old daughter from a previous marriage. My new husband is amazing and adores my daughter. We are having another baby in November. My in-laws were great for the first few months but have had a few issues come up and I want to know what your opinion is of this particular scenario. My daughter was having a sleepover with my in-laws, who she adores. I found out whilst they had her that my husband's mum's nephew had come over and had a sleepover too. He is 9 and we have met him maybe 2 or 3 times. They slept in the same bed upstairs whilst my partner's parents were sleeping downstairs. We were incredibly uncomfortable with this. When we confronted them, it was basically implied that we were being over dramatic and they refused to accept that we weren't okay with it and did not apologise. Do you think we were being over dramatic? When my husband picked her up he walked in the room and they were watching movies and TV shows in the bed together, not supervised and the nephew didn't even recognise who my husband was so we are definitely not close family.

 

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Hosted by Britt Hockley & Keeshia Pettit 

Produced by Keeshia Pettit

Video Produced by Vanessa Beckford

Recorded on Cammeraygal Land

Tell your mum, tell your dad, tell

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Transcript

Episode Transcript

Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
This episode was recorded on Cameragle Land. Hi guys, and
welcome back to another set of life on CUT. I'm
Brittany and I'm Keisha. Keisha, please tell everyone what just happened.

Speaker 2 (00:22):
This is something that if you're the type of person
who has a bit of a queasy stomach like, it
feels me too.

Speaker 1 (00:27):
So I won't go into too much detail.

Speaker 2 (00:29):
But as it was happening, Okay, So as I was
driving here this morning, I got to this certain part
of traffic and something that I don't know if I've
said this on the podcast before, but I have the
most raging motion sickness, Like I don't know what happens.
It just takes over my body in any form of
like transport.

Speaker 1 (00:47):
I piggyback to you one day and you vomited. That
was wild ride, wasn't it.

Speaker 2 (00:50):
Remember that time we went to the Great Barrier Reef
and I was so excited.

Speaker 1 (00:54):
I'd never seen it before. From the time I took
you on a helicopter and you vomited it with about
thirty centimeters away from me the whole time, and all
I could smells vomits. So I sip with you vomited.
How could I forget.

Speaker 2 (01:05):
The three vomit bags that day. Yeah, it's a real problem.
And travel sickness meds don't work. I know everyone would
be like, just take some of those. Firstly, they make
you super drowsy. Secondly, they don't work. There was one
time I was going to.

Speaker 1 (01:18):
See you know, the Blue Grotto is it? Yeah? In Capri.

Speaker 2 (01:23):
I was so excited, but I knew I was going
to be on a boat all day, so I took
seasickness medication. I fucking slept through the whole thing. It
made me so drowsy that I missed it. I woke
up and I was like, are we there? And they
were like, she's been pretty.

Speaker 1 (01:36):
Much passed out in the hostel. You're back on the bus. Dream.
It's a problem that.

Speaker 2 (01:44):
I face a lot, but usually when I'm driving it's
not an issue.

Speaker 1 (01:48):
You also were sick. I don't know why we were
rattling every time you were sick of You also sick
on our tour bus when we were touring Australia. Who
are we when we're touring? When a Lifelime cut show
I was during, we weren't like rock stars, but you
were sick on that too. You yeah, you don't do
well with anything.

Speaker 2 (02:02):
I really don't, which doesn't match my personality because I
really like the adventures. I like the activities if you
need the adventures on foot, on ground, on level ground. Anyway,
I was driving to work this morning, and I was
in a little bit of traffic, so it was a
little bit stopped starting.

Speaker 1 (02:18):
But there was just the strangest thing happened.

Speaker 2 (02:22):
It just took over my body and I was like,
Oh my god, I'm gonna throw up. And I panicked,
and I looked around and I was like, what can
I throw up into? I'm gonna need to throw up. Anyway,
the closest thing I could find was my Frank during
bottles not sponsored, not sponsored. As someone's commented on our

(02:44):
YouTube before that my drink bottle and all the dints
on it really pisses the moss.

Speaker 1 (02:47):
So sorry about that. And if Frankreine are sending them,
I would like one too. Anyway, I looked at it,
the panic was taking over. The water bottle was full.

Speaker 2 (02:57):
But I have this little silicon thing on the bottom
of my drink bottle, and it's so that it doesn't
get banged up as much. It's also so that in recordings.
I can put it down and it doesn't bang the microphone.

Speaker 1 (03:06):
Why did I always think that that was like an
inbuilt dog water bowl? It can work like that. I
do use it for the girls.

Speaker 2 (03:12):
However, this morning, I like ripped this thing off the bottom,
but it was a little bit too late and some
of it had already started to like come out.

Speaker 1 (03:22):
So you threw up in your Frank Green drink bottle?

Speaker 2 (03:23):
Well I threw I kind of like half threw up
on myself and half threw up into this little sorry cuppy.

Speaker 1 (03:29):
Did we just brainstorm Frank Green you marketing campaign? But
when you get sick morning sickness, maybe it's yeah, emotions
sickness change.

Speaker 2 (03:38):
And I still don't know what it was. I don't
know if I ate something bad last night. I hadn't
had coffee yet, so it couldn't have been that.

Speaker 1 (03:45):
I was doing burnouts this morning. Dowey's in a circle.
Maybe it was that and that slipped my way into
the It was very bizarre.

Speaker 2 (03:53):
But anyway, this might be a little bit of behind
the scenes and I could be giving away some of
our secrets. I kind of like I kind of threw
f on to myself and I was like, this is
really embarrassing, Like I'm thirty two years old.

Speaker 1 (04:05):
Why is this happening, this happens to children. No, because
it obviously wasn't motion sickness. You've obviously had like a
bad prawn. I don't know what you had, but like
something didn't sit right with you, because that's not normal.

Speaker 2 (04:15):
You don't just usually drive the path out the side. Yeah,
certainly not when I'm driving. I reckon, I might have
had some salad leaves last night that were probably a
little bit too old, if I'm being honest, I think
they've been in the crisper for too long.

Speaker 1 (04:27):
I don't know if let us does that too. I reckon.
Salad can actually make you quite sick. It can harvest
bacteria and stuff. But I always thought that was from
like the water that anyway, whatever, this is why I
shouldn't eat salad. Anyway.

Speaker 2 (04:39):
I had a change of clothes in my bag, because
sometimes when we have multiple recordings on the same day,
we try to, you know, bring a different shirt or something,
just so that it.

Speaker 1 (04:48):
Doesn't look like it's been on the same day. This
is it's salad. This is why you have my diet
and you eat Dino nuggets. I've never been sick. No,
that is a BTS. We we often do multiple interviews
in a day, like yesterday was one of those examples.
You know, we had a ten hour day or something,
and we bring change of clothes to look like they're

(05:08):
different days, but they're not. But I did walk in today.
Keisha's like, am I giving Hawaiian Dad on holiday? I
was like a little bit cute.

Speaker 2 (05:18):
Well, it's also going to be for multiple recordings today
because my other shirt has got stuff down the front
that makes me.

Speaker 1 (05:24):
Look like I'm a child. I'm so lazy now that
my outfit changes. I just lay up and so like,
I'm just gonna take the jumper off. I've got a
shirt underneath, and then the next one I take it off.
I've got a single it the same skirt and boots,
and I just like take it off. That's brilliant. That
is so funny.

Speaker 2 (05:38):
Sorry, guys, I know it's Monday morning, and I just
hope that you're having a better commute to work than
what I am.

Speaker 1 (05:43):
You know what is funny? Can you remind me? I
cannot think of the comment. But we laughed about this.
We probably shouldn't laugh but I just want to say
something because someone's gonna write to us on this as well.
Trigger warnings. We will not be doing trigger warnings when
we are talking about EGGX. We are not going to
be doing trigger warnings when we speak about Keisha vomiting.
And what was the one someone wrote into us? It
was ridiculous. Someone wrote in a couple of days ago

(06:05):
of something we spoke about and they were like, hey, guys,
would have been nice to have a trigger warning, and
it was so funny. I think it was the eggick.

Speaker 2 (06:10):
No, No, it was actually from last week's Ask Guncut
and it was the question about the father in law
that was pet sitting but also was quite dirty and
he had a storm a bag and so sometimes like
when he was emptying a bag, he would spill it.

Speaker 1 (06:25):
And so we were talking about stuff going down.

Speaker 2 (06:27):
We were talking about fuces going down the front of
the toilet bolt. I'm sorry, we can't have you know
that this is going to be a really I know
that this is going to piss a lot.

Speaker 1 (06:36):
Of people off.

Speaker 2 (06:37):
It's controversial trigger warnings. There has been research done on them.
They don't work. It can make it worse. It actually
can put people into a state of anxiety. There has
been actual research done on this, and every now and then,
when we're talking about something that is like particularly heavy
or particularly triggering for you know, I'm using that word
for people to listen to, we will occasion only do them.

Speaker 1 (07:01):
I'm not putting them on the front of every wing.

Speaker 2 (07:04):
We put a trigger warning on the front of something
that could trigger anybody, we would literally have to do
it for every single conversation we ever have.

Speaker 1 (07:12):
But it's a bit ridiculous, like, guys, we're not going
to trigger warning a stoma bag and someone that accidentally
spilt their pooh, I'm sorry.

Speaker 2 (07:19):
And sometimes it confuses me when it's in the title
as well, like when it's in the heading.

Speaker 1 (07:23):
I was about to say, I was listening to a
podcast the other day that was talking about this and
they said the same exactly that They were like someone
had written into them and said, would it be nice
to have a trigger warning? And they were like, it's
literally the title of the episode. Like, for example, it
might have been like the day I lost my dad
or something, and I've just made that up, right, but
someone's like, hey, would be nice to have a trigger
warning because I've lost my dad, and they were like,

(07:45):
but it's the time, Like, you know what it is.
It's the title of the episode in the bio, like
this idea of everyone being so triggered by stuff. If
you're triggered by Pooh, you need to figure your shit out.
And that was no punning turned in in that, actually,
but that was brilliant. Yeah.

Speaker 2 (07:59):
Look, obviously we're talking about things that are a little
bit more frivolous or a little bit more surface level.
I understand that there are genuinely things that people feel
as though it takes them back to a place where
something really horrible happened to them, or an experience that
they didn't necessarily want to think about in that moment.
I understand that there are uses for them, and we

(08:19):
try to use our discretion for when that might be.
But also it's kind of hard to understand what will
cause everybody to flash back to an experience that is
really triggering for them. So yeah, like, but the reason
I'm saying that is because I don't want it to
make it sound as they were, like.

Speaker 1 (08:36):
Trigger warnings are thirteen yearseless, like get over yourselves.

Speaker 2 (08:39):
It's just that if we were to put a trigger
warning on everything, that we are asked to put a
trigger warning on, you would have an episode that was
just like trigger wading question, trigger water in question.

Speaker 1 (08:48):
The problem is too and now that we're just going
to get sitting this and get serious because we may
as well, like we may as well unpack it a
little bit. The reason we battle with it and the
reason you might hear a lot of people battle with it.
There's probably a lot of broadcasters and podcasters and people
that you think should use it that don't. And we
battle with it because we have always used in the

(09:09):
past and try to use trigger warnings for things that
we deem to warrant it and to be serious enough,
we laugh, we're never going to do it for things
like pooh right, or Keisha vomiting or the egggg like
that's fucking ridiculous. But the reason we battle with it
is because we take it very seriously, so like we
looked into the research behind it and the science behind it,
and just so instead of just saying, like, you know,

(09:30):
there is research just so you understand. For example, like
you can google this and there are so many research articles,
but psychology today has literally an article on anxiety. They're
headings do trigger warnings work research finds trigger warnings may
not help reduce negative emotions. It goes on to say
they do not serve their intended purpose. They don't reduce

(09:51):
the emotional distress of experiencing graphic content, and they also
don't lead people to avoid or opt out of graphic content.
But they do leave to more anticipatory anxiety before viewing
the graphic content. So just so you know, sometimes if
we don't put it on, it's because the research says
we shouldn't. And I know, from the outside, if you

(10:11):
haven't heard that research, you're like, well, that's not cool.
You should be trigger warning. But we've actually done enough
due diligence to say, well, you know what the science says,
it's not actually helping you. And there are situations that
I think they are needed, and we still do it
for some for sure. But that that's what I mean
by it's our internal battle is like, we want to
do it because we want you guys to know we're
thinking about it. But on the other side, we're saying, well,

(10:33):
what are you supposed to do if research is literally
saying that by doing it, you may be making things worse.
So it's it's a tricky battle.

Speaker 2 (10:41):
Yeah, and I like I kind of battle between this
idea of being in a bit of a cowboy and
just like cutting loose and then.

Speaker 1 (10:48):
Trigger warning cowboys warning, you get a trigger warning, you
know what I mean.

Speaker 2 (10:54):
I don't want to say that they're so ridiculous we're
never going to use them because I also don't want
to cause anyone emotional distress.

Speaker 1 (11:00):
Yes, I just think that's interesting. It's interesting for you
guys to know that research behind it, and I encourage
you to go and have a look at that yourself
because it is fascinating. I agree. Should we get into
our vibes the week? Yeah, you kick it off Hawaiian Dad,
multiple reor no, I'm taking I actually love it, vibing,
bringing a change of clothes to work in case you
throw up, and you're like, can I just say one
other thing? Keisha does the socials, right, So she did

(11:22):
our stories last week, and she the vibes and unsubscribes
the number of people that marriage me totally stitch you
up the number of pills. Message me saying are you
vibing yourself? Because Keshia goes Brits vibe And it was
a picture of me that was it no context? Brits
vibe me like looking hot at my hands, that was it,
And I was like, bro, you stitched me up. Keisha's

(11:43):
was like mine is an academic paper, Brits vibe herself.
I was like fuck you, and the number of people
I had to copy and paste and be like, hey,
that's I'm not actually vibing myself.

Speaker 2 (11:54):
It was clicked the I would have seen that you
vibed the necklace you were wearing in that picture. People
don't click it. You've just you set me up for
failure like a narcissist.

Speaker 1 (12:06):
That is feel and myself.

Speaker 2 (12:07):
Maybe we should have put a trigger warning on that
vibe and said she's not actually vibing herself.

Speaker 1 (12:12):
Yeah no, sorry, I actually did fuck you over there.
That's my bad.

Speaker 2 (12:14):
I will put my head in the air because she's
like what. I will make sure I label it more
clearly next time. My vibe this week is it's actually
like a fiction book, like a novel. I am not
a reader, as you know, I am an audio book listener,
and every now and then I would just get to
a phase where I listened to a lot of podcasts,
like probably about three hours a day. I tend to

(12:36):
have them on a lot, and every now and then
I'll just get to this point where I'm like, I
think I need a little bit of sugar. I need
a bit of like a nice story to listen to.
And I've vibed Emily Henry before. She is an author
that I really really like. This particular book is my
favorite one that I've listened to. I was gonna say
that I've read of hers.

Speaker 1 (12:53):
It's called Great, Big, Beautiful Life.

Speaker 2 (12:55):
So it was actually one of the Reese Witherspoon book
Club picks as well, and it's about two writers. I'm
going to read it like a little sentence blurb for you.
Two writers compete for the chance to tell the larger
than life story of an heiress who has been in
hiding for decades. So what I love about Emily Henry
books is that you kind of have the main storyline
and then there's all these kind of intertwined storyline.

Speaker 1 (13:17):
This is probably about everything, like is it not just
a book? But the thing I love about her is
an author she writes.

Speaker 2 (13:25):
There's a lot of different generations of stories that come out,
like it's more complex.

Speaker 1 (13:29):
Some people are definitely more complex writers.

Speaker 2 (13:31):
Yeah, yeah, and so there's always a romance story or
even sometimes a few.

Speaker 1 (13:36):
And I loved this book. I really really enjoyed it.

Speaker 2 (13:39):
It had a twist towards the end that I didn't
see coming, and yeah, I just think it's fantastic if
you if you are in a bit of a mood
where you need just a novel that's really nice to
either listen to or to read and you like that
kind of thing. It's not in the fantasy world. It's
not really in any of the Dragons or you know,
any of.

Speaker 1 (13:56):
The smut that. There was actually one scene in this
that was kind of hot. It was like a little bit,
a little bit steamy. So just a little bit of
that dribbled in, just smash, dribbled intle bit more.

Speaker 2 (14:09):
I spoke about this, We spoke about Clitterature it would
be about a year and a half ago, and I
spoke about Pucking Around. It was the first smut book
I read, and I went from zero to one hundred.
It was intense, and at one point I read out
a paragraph to Laura and it was so funny. But
then we posted a video of it on Instagram, and

(14:30):
the author of the book common to Go and I
wanted to die. I was so emparissed. I was like,
oh no, like I just felt I felt as though
it seemed as though we were making a joke about
we weren't. It was just that, you know, reading out smut,
there's no way you can do it if you're reading
it out loud on a podcast without laughing.

Speaker 1 (14:48):
So yeah, I'm never gonna do that again. Oh my god. Okay,
great book, great, yes, greatly book, great, big beautiful life, Okay, wonderful.
My vibe this week is actually an Instagram. It's this
account that I've just become absolutely obsessed with. It's an
instagram called Parker get a Job or one word Parker
is his name. I guess I don't know Parker have

(15:09):
a job. He's a twenty three year old American guy
and he has a million followers. He is a debater.
His whole instagram is political. He's obviously a highly intelligent,
very well researched young man, and if you're pro Trump,
don't follow him. So he's like a podcaster. So he
gets like people to call up and he'll just ask
some Really, he just chats to them, right, He just

(15:31):
wants to get to know them and he wants to
get to know who they are and what they're about
and why they feel so strongly about Trump and his
policies and whatever else. But it's comedic without it trying
to be. It's a real insight to how it's operating.
And I learn a lot from him, So you laugh,
you become obsessed with these reels. But he's just so
well educated, so well versed on it, and he has
some really big debates, Like he was like a person

(15:54):
that was debating Charlie Kirk a lot. You know, that
was what Charlie Kirk did. He went around to schools
and unis and he was debating. So Parker, get a job.

Speaker 2 (16:01):
This guy.

Speaker 1 (16:02):
He's got multiple reels of him debating Charlie over the
years and they're great to watch. But he was also
there when Charlie was shot. He was there at the moment,
and he's got a video like running away, like when
he was assassinated, He's got a video running away being like,
we don't know what's going on, we think someone's been shot.
Like he's so involved in that world, is what I'm saying,
Like that political debating world. But that's obviously I mean,
that's not why im vibe was horrific, but just him

(16:24):
as a person, I just think I love what he's
done and I'm just so fascinated with his content. Obviously,
you still need to be watching it and to do
your own research. Do not go and watch yeah, do
not go and watch it for the sake of like
I'm going there to learn. Watch it as much for
entertainment as it is for like, hey, is that policy real?
Is that something that really happened? And then you can

(16:45):
look it up yourself as well.

Speaker 2 (16:46):
Well. Once you just said this, I've searched him on
Google and I was like, oh, I've seen this guy.
There was actually a time where I was going to
bring One of the things he said to the podcast
is something we might want to do a bit of
an unpack on, and it was really interesting.

Speaker 1 (16:58):
The question that was posed to him was do you sorry?

Speaker 2 (17:01):
The question he posted someone else was do you think
men are better in leadership positions?

Speaker 1 (17:06):
Yep, I've seen that one. So the guy responded being like, yes,
we're naturally you know better at it. Blah blah blah.

Speaker 2 (17:11):
His response to the person was all about the physiological
reasons that women handle stress better. He used statistics of
like violence and suicide and all these different things that
show that women are actually a little bit more emotionally
equipped to be in leadership positions. However, he did claim
one thing about physiology about basically he said that you know,

(17:32):
there's an area of the brainstem that is thicker in women.
He's like, that's why they're better at handling this. That's
not necessarily the case, Like, just because something does exist
physiologically doesn't mean that that's the reason. So the thing
that I like about this type of content, though, and
even even though I disagreed almost entirely with everything that

(17:52):
Charlie Kirk said during his debates, I really do enjoy
hearing the other side and hearing kind of the perspective
of people who feel differently. And I think that when
you get to see both sides of that dynamic, like
we are getting more polarized. I mean, it's true, like
our algorithms are so polarized that you will often only
see the perspective that you agree with. And so it's

(18:14):
good for me to see the conflicting perspectives and have
it debated by people who have intelligent arguments or even
are just able to express their opinion in a way
that isn't going to cause an argument.

Speaker 1 (18:26):
It is a debate. I really do enjoy that type
of content and learning from mass Yeah. The reason, I mean, like,
the reason I feel like people like this are so
good is that, for example, he's so against Charlie Kirk,
but when that happened and Charlie was assassinated, and like,
he has so much content promoting that he is debating
these people. When that assassination happened, he did a whole

(18:46):
thing that was like, what the fuck? Guys, like this
is not that this is not the answer. This is
somebody that so thoroughly publicly disagrees with somebody and can
still be saying like this is not the answer. And
I think that we need more of those people that
you can disagree with somebody and it doesn't mean you
wish harm on somebody. So anyway, I know that that
vibe took a stupid turn. No, but I just recommend

(19:08):
going and having a look and see if you like him. Perfect.
Let's get into the questions. Question number one, thinking about
making a sex tape for my boyfriend. My partner and
I are thinking about making a sex tape. He's a
FIFOs a flying fire out week on, week off. We
can't really talk on the phone or FaceTime because of
his job. He's always around all these other people, and
he sleeps in like a swag. He sleeps in. I

(19:29):
think that they put them in like rooms of people.
But the point is there's a lot of people around him,
so if he had a call, everyone's gonna hear what
they're talking. Definitely can't be doing sexy time on a call,
so like at the most, it is, hey, how you
going now? I really trust him and I don't have
any fears that he will show anyone or anything bad
will happen. Am I being stupid? Because things live on
the internet forever and it could always get out somehow.

(19:49):
Whilst I think this is my person, I guess you
can break up one day and then maybe it will
get out. I don't know, do I do it or not? Also,
have you ever done it? I love your girls so
much and I couldn't think of any anyone else that
I would possibly ask if they've made a kinky sex tape?
A structed it? You obviously can't. I'm joking. Have you
made no? I'm never I have a hand on heart.

(20:12):
Never made a sex tape and personally, I will never
I will never do it. Okay, we'll be exciting.

Speaker 2 (20:20):
Ever to that probably implies what my answer to this is. Yeah, obviously,
Keisha has I've made multiple I think?

Speaker 1 (20:26):
Wow, I think do I with the same person or
multiple different people? Are you every relationship? Would like to
plead the fifth one? Okay, I think we can read
between the con Do I regret it? Well? Hang on,
how many are we talking? Not many? Not many? There
was definitely one boyfriend in particular that.

Speaker 2 (20:47):
Like really enjoyed it, and we we had an element
of distance to our relationships. So, like, the only reason
I regret it is because of who it was with,
because I now have really negative feelings about that person.
So it's not actually the video making or the fact
that it exists that I regret. It's him though, Yeah,

(21:08):
if that makes sense to that distinction, it makes sense.
And it's not because I am fearful that he will
ever leak it or anything like that. I just don't
like the fact that he still has it and I
hate him.

Speaker 1 (21:23):
Do you know what it is for me? I mean,
you can do what you want, right, Like sex is
a wonderful thing. You trust your partner. Absolutely, that's why
you're with your partner. You think they're going to be forever.
And I hate to be a Debbie downer. You just
don't know. And I say that because I've been in it.
You guys all know, I was with someone for two years.
I thought I was gonna marry and he had fucking

(21:43):
six people on the goal and another relationship that it
was identical to mine, like he was marrying someone else.
And I would have put my life on it that
that wasn't the case. And he, funnily enough, was the
only person that's ever really wanted to make one. I
remember he was the one that wanted to It's always
the narcissistic ones. Yeah, And I just think, thank god
I didn't because this person was unhinged. I just didn't know.

(22:07):
And I just also think the way technology is progressing
is really scary, the way people are hacking things, the
way people data's being leaked and videos are being leaked.
And I don't want to come across as is like
this boring oldest sister. That's like reprimanding you. But I
just think you need to be so careful. And unfortunately
this goes so much further than trusting your partner. Like

(22:29):
back in the day it used to the internet wasn't
a thing, when there was dial up like VCR films.
You know, it was a different time. And now I
just think it is far too easy for something to
go wrong or for it to be leaked or I
don't know, it's for me. I just think there's so
much more you can do in a relationship to fill
that void. There are different intimacies that you can have,
but at the end of the day, do what you want,

(22:51):
but you need to be hyper aware of what can happen,
That's what I think, and how that's going to make
you feel if that does happen.

Speaker 2 (22:56):
I definitely agree with the like cyber element of it.
I mean, we are protected more by revenge porn laws
than what we ever had been before.

Speaker 1 (23:03):
Which is a great thing.

Speaker 2 (23:04):
And that being said, though, like you're in a situation
that is a bit abnormal, and I think, like your partner,
why love it?

Speaker 1 (23:11):
Like it might be the absolute best thing that gets
him through.

Speaker 2 (23:15):
These like long stints where he's doing flight and play art,
like they're pretty brutal days.

Speaker 1 (23:19):
Yeah, but you don't do a sex tape of someone
to get him through the fucking swag he's sleeping in Like,
that's no, I disagree with that.

Speaker 2 (23:26):
Being a supportive partner, send him a boom, send him
a boobm photo, no face, no defining features.

Speaker 1 (23:32):
I'm definitely not against it.

Speaker 2 (23:34):
I think it can be really fun and I do
think that there is an element that it spices things
up for you. I don't know if everyone would feel
this way, but it definitely is like hot watching. You
enjoy that with your partner back. But if you are
worried about security concerns, not necessarily because you don't trust
that person, and not even because you think that there

(23:55):
is a chance you might break up.

Speaker 1 (23:56):
It's more so about cybersecurity.

Speaker 2 (23:58):
For me, it's the fact that, like neither of us
may be in control of the fact that those things
they go to a cloud server, they can be taken.
If you are going to do it, I would recommend
putting it in one of those apps that has like
additional protection.

Speaker 1 (24:11):
And wear like a sleeping bag of your head. I'm hot,
wear a Batman mask my days Batman. But yeah, like it.
It surprises me that not more people have done this.
I think lots of people have. Yeah, the thing is Keche.
I'm not arguing with anything you said. Everything is said
is right, it's hot, it's great to watch back. It
spices things up. That's not the argument. The argument is
is the juice worth of squeeze? Imagine everything you do

(24:34):
now with internet you have to think what is the
worst case scenario? Because once that is out there, and
like you said it, you said, once it's out there,
it's out there. That's absolutely fucking true. Like you cannot
get anything off the internet, like you cannot scrub it,
but you do look pretty hot in it. Have you
made a sex tapeness? Have you? Videographer Nests? Imagine the
cinematography on that. She's a videographer. She find had multip linings,

(24:57):
perfect multiple agle's four K height. We had a little
contrast here, shadows down and do you trust that to
live like on both of your phones or like old one? Okay,
so it was an old relationship and Nest kept it
on her phone, so that that's obviously something like.

Speaker 2 (25:13):
That's actually interesting to me though, because in my current relationship,
I have never in my life received a nude from
the person I've been with for two and a half years,
and he was the first person that i'd been.

Speaker 1 (25:23):
We're not even allowed to use his name that like,
he's not you know what I mean, that's the first
time that I've been with that hasn't done that and
hasn't like he's.

Speaker 2 (25:32):
He would never if we can, it would never make
a sex tape. But it's interesting to me that like
our long term relationships. Nessa's been in a relationship for
can you yeah, like a decade, but it's only past
ones when we were a little bit more maybe a
little bit more younger, naive.

Speaker 1 (25:48):
And a little bit more risky. You're if tobler own
ever let you say his name out loud, that would
be hot for you, because like that, that's what's sexy.
You're like, let me say say it. He's a you
know what.

Speaker 2 (26:02):
I actually just thought that a solution to this could
be and hear me out. A lot of us have
old phones, right, like old ones that are from a
previous model or whatever. What you could do is film
it on that and have it on aeroplane.

Speaker 1 (26:17):
Mode, so that but you're still missing that they have it.
You're still missing the point of like someone that might
not be with you forever and that you might not trust,
will still have that data someone that is in a
swag with a bunch of men on the other side
of the of the country or the world, or wherever
he is. And I'm not saying you don't trust him.
That's not what I'm saying. You just have to be

(26:38):
hyper aware of what can happen. I just think, like,
I mean, you do you of course, there are people
that do sex tapes and stuff with their face. I know,
we laughed, but there's people that do it with their
face covered, or these people that do it from an
angle that might be just from behind, and you can't
see the identity of the person, like there is ways
around it. And I don't mean to say I have
a really boring relationship, but if my daughter came to

(26:59):
me and ask me now, my advice would be no.
And it's not based on a stigma. I'd like, go
for gold and rude. I'd be like, do what you want.
But I'd be so I'm just so hyper aware of
the internet, you know. And imagine if I if I
had a sex tape and I said I had one
now someone would like the cardash is pretty take one
for the team. Someone to be hacking into my phone

(27:19):
to try and get it like a hut. Don't flatter yourself.
They would, They absolutely fucking would because remember poor Olivia
the lance Do you guys remember, yes, Olivia, that happened
to her, And but there's laws now like it has changed,
things have caught up.

Speaker 2 (27:34):
We actually had a woman named Kayla who was on
that website is anybody up? We did a revenge porn
episode with her. Also, the word revenge porn is something
that I have really become hyper aware of the fact
that we should not be calling it revenge porn because
it's not pornography. Pornography is consensual. This is like revenge
sexual assault material, and that was something that I am
glad I became aware of more recently. But look, I

(27:57):
think a very good solution to this could be use
one of your old phones.

Speaker 1 (28:02):
Film it only on.

Speaker 2 (28:03):
That disconnect it from being able to connect to any
form of like four G, five G or Wi Fi,
so it can't go to a cloud server. And he
breaks a cloud server, you break up, that phone comes
back to you got a lovely man that's got your
sex tape that's breaking up. When he was gonna be
like here, take all your sexy data back, they're keeping it.

(28:24):
You're exit you had the sex tape.

Speaker 1 (28:26):
With he's got that. I wonder if you watched what
he does. No, he definitely wouldn't. He dislikes me as
much as I dislike nudes. Send him some news, remember
when I used to do. I think I've shown keys
in my news for it and Laura like I've shown
them my news and I've been like he's this hot
or not not full, you know, but like remember that
one I thought it was really cool and I took

(28:47):
a nude where the vase was just covering like my
It was like I was like, this is so artie
and it was like I think I cut my face
out too, or he got with some boobs and a
vase over my vagina because that's how worried I am.
And do you know what I'm not with that person?
So the vas lives on. The vas lives on, but

(29:08):
no one knows the face. So no one knows who
naked vas lady is if that got out, except now
all of you. If you've seen a naked vas lady,
it's highly likely it's me, all right.

Speaker 2 (29:18):
Next question, how to discuss finances slash de facto with
my new boyfriend. I earn much more. I've been seeing
a guy for about five to six months. All is
going great, and he is a walking green flag. I'm
starting to feel myself at getting a bit more invested,
but I'm still not one hundred percent sure. I'm a
bit of an overthinker and it takes me a while
to fully trust and warm up to someone. My problem

(29:40):
is a financial one. I have a relatively successful business.
I'm talking seven figures, which he is aware of. I
understand that there will come a time where we have
to discuss what this looks like going forward, and when
we are classed as a de facto relationship, how our
finances will look. I know that there are some criteria
that has to be met before being classified as de
facto and what he might be entitled to should we

(30:03):
continue on this steady path. In my opinion, everything that
I have earned before him in my business and property
purchases is considered my own, and I worry that he
could be entitled to that when we are considered de facto.
Not that I think he would ever take anything from me,
but you never know. The thing is I am unsure
of when I should broach this topic with him. Part
of me wants to discuss it now so that I

(30:24):
know we are on the same page rather than getting
another one to two years in and if he's unhappy
about it, that's a big red flag to me. Is
it worth having this conversation sooner rather than later? And
if so, how would you go about discussing it? We
are quite open with everything else, and we know what
each other earns and salaries, etc. He also partially owns
a property and is on a six figure salary.

Speaker 1 (30:47):
Yeah, so he's not done bad either. No, he's been fantastic. Okay.
I have some strong feelings about this. Firstly, like, hats
off to you for earning absolute bank and sering your
life up. That is amazing you to protect that. And
the reason I say that is this is almost I'm
almost gonna say the same thing I just said in
the sex tape thing when you said I don't think

(31:09):
he would ever do anything or he would ever be
the kind of person that would take from me. Of
of course you don't like That's why we date people.
If you thought that somebody would take or steal from you,
or take your hard earned property and cash, you wouldn't
be with them. But the fact is people do every
single day, and money makes people monsters, Like greed is

(31:30):
something that it just tears families apart, tears relationships apart.
Money is really hard to come by, especially in this
economic crisis that we're in.

Speaker 2 (31:39):
I've also actually seen people in my life do things
when it comes to money that I didn't think they
would ever do. And I've been you know, like I've
seen people kind of being taken to the cleaners, and
I've also seen people take money that I don't think
was rightfully theirs.

Speaker 1 (31:56):
I am experiencing something in my life right now that
is exactly that. And I will say it is not
my family, not obviously not my relationship, but someone that
is being the ugliest person over money. It's me I'm
trying to extort because she's like a prepare. But you know,
one day maybe I'll talk about that. But I just

(32:17):
think it is so important. And I had a life
set up before I met Ben. I'll use myself as
an example. I had bought myself an investment property many
many years ago that I had worked so fucking hard for,
like since I was twenty years old, I had been hustling.
Bought myself an investment property put a little bit of
money in shares to try and set myself up, especially
because I was like, cool, I'm in my thirties, I'm single.

(32:39):
I'm never gonna have that shared relationship money with someone.
I've got to set my life up now for myself
and act like maybe I won't meet somebody. And I'm
so proud to say that I did and I made
some really good decisions. But can I actually interrupt you here?
This is something I don't think a lot of people
actually know the truth about you.

Speaker 2 (32:56):
And I think it's something that you see the lifestyle
that you have now, and something that I think a
lot of people don't know is how much you built
that for yourself. Like you didn't have an abundant financial education,
your upbringing. You weren't given you weren't given any money
to go towards that property for example, Like, no, you
really didn't come from a point of financial privilege. And

(33:18):
I think it's really inspiring the way that you have
set yourself up from a place where like you didn't
have a leg up, You didn't even have the education
that would give you the leg up, Like I mean,
I went to school, Yeah, But what I mean is
like I think when you come from money, when it's
like generation, it's almost bilt those values and stuff in
built into you so that you understand how to invest

(33:40):
in anything, whether it be property or stocks or whatever,
how to be a good saver. Money values are something
that we are taught without even really knowing about it
when we're growing up. And I think it's I actually
think it's really admirable the fact that you have been
able to build that for yourself. And so that's why
I understand it's so important for you that when you
were dating or whether you were getting into a relationship,

(34:03):
you felt the need to protect that because you had
literally built it from the ground up yourself.

Speaker 1 (34:08):
Yeah, And I mean I had the best upbringing. Like
I'm one of four kids or eighteen months apart, very close,
just from a small town in put Cray. My parents,
hot parents, My parents been together forever, the most stable family.
But we just were very very normal. My parents worked
so hard for us to not miss out or anything.
But we've never been given. They got us through school

(34:29):
and sent us to UNI to get our education. And
then there we're adults. You're on our own. We're not
getting money for houses, No, absolutely not but it's funny
because I was very financially driven being young. I remember
going and buying finance books when I was eighteen seventeen
eighteen and just reading them at home instead of like novels,

(34:49):
because I was like, how am I going to make
my life easier? Like what can I do with my money?
I didn't want to be making mistakes. And I bought
my first house at twenty. This sounds wild now. I
bought it off like a nine five percent loan. I
think I had you guys gonna laugh, eight thousand dollars
deposit and it was a big house, but that was it.
But they used to loan for that. You know, you
used to be able to get property. But like my

(35:11):
point is like I've yes, I have worked very hard
and I haven't been given anything. But the bigger point
is you just and I hate him fle this person,
but you just can't trust people. I read an article
on the way in here very different, literally like an
hour ago, and it was that Sea singer. She's getting divorced.
She's only been with him for two years, and he

(35:32):
is now saying, well, you've set me up with a lifestyle.
I'm too used to it. I want two hundred and
fifty thousand dollars a month, five hundred thousand dollars initial
payout up front. He's like, because in the last two
years you've made me want this lifestyle. She wouldn't have
married him thinking that he's going to be doing that anyway.
That's my that's my thing. But so when I got
with Ben, we had a really frank discussion because I thought,

(35:52):
there is no I don't care who you are, how
much I love you, there's no way I'm going to
let someone into something that I have built to take
it from me. And we just said at the ground
really early and I said, look, this is what I've
already done for myself and that will be mine forever,
whether we're together for thirty years, that's mine. And he
was like aps a fucking lutely, And we signed something
that states that so if we ever split up, we'll

(36:14):
split everything from here on in. But he can't touch that.
And I would so strongly advise that you do the
same thing, and you do it soon like so A
technically it's a bit blurry. We tried to look it up,
but technically they say now like on the Australian Family
lawyer's website. Two years living together is considered de facto,
but it can be less than that base situation to situation.

(36:37):
So if he wanted to and he said, look, we've
been together for a year, we have a shared account.
Like I have seen people people in my own life
who have lost everything to a partner, including superannuation, including
their superannuation because they took it to a lawyer and
the judge was like, yeah, fuck it. You guys have
been together a couple years. You can take half of everything.
So it's just a protection thing. I think, like it's yours.
If he has an issue with you saying, hey, I

(36:58):
just want to ensure that you know what's mine is mine?
Are you okay with that? If he has an issue
with that, I'd be getting the fuck out of there.
Do you know what?

Speaker 2 (37:04):
Actually, I come to this conversation from the other perspective
where I would be more like your partner in this
and my partner when we got together, he already owned
a home, and he also earns more money than me,
and his family have more money than what I have,
And we had these conversations pretty early on. I actually

(37:26):
think I was the one who brought it up because
we moved in together after only nine months of dating.

Speaker 1 (37:31):
Keisha brought up She's like, I just want you to
know that I will take the house if we wanted
to know all men, No, quite the opposite.

Speaker 2 (37:38):
I actually took it as an opportunity. I think a
lot of the time these things are viewed so negatively, like, oh,
you're gonna think that I'm insinuating we're gonna break up.
I actually used it as an opportunity not to prove
myself and that that was never my intention, but to
make it really fucking clear that that wasn't why I
was in this relationship. And so I remember I brought

(37:59):
it up and I was like, hey, I just want
to let you know, like with us moving in together,
if there's any type of agreement that you want me
to legally sign or you know, we want to have
a conversation about it. I just want you to know
that my intentions are X and Y. This is how
I see things. I would never want to take from you.
I would never want you to take from me. We

(38:20):
bought a house together this year in April, and we're
not equal owners of that home. He's a sixty percent
owner and I'm a forty percent owner because he came
to the equation with a lot more money than what
I did, and so we have that kind of in
the home ownership agreement.

Speaker 1 (38:36):
But it's interesting to.

Speaker 2 (38:38):
Me when people feel really uncomfortable about having these conversations,
because I don't see it as a negative thing. I
actually see it as a way to kind of show
that you know, you have shared values of the fact
that that's how you both see finances, and that's how
you both see entering a relationship for reasons other than money,
you know what I mean. I know that you shouldn't
have to prove yourself, but I think it's a really

(39:00):
quick way to prove yourself and to prove that you
are both aligned on those values totally.

Speaker 1 (39:04):
And it's it's very different. Obviously we are talking about
this specific situation. It's obviously different when you've been married
for X amount of years, you've had kids, you're at home,
you've given up an income for however many years.

Speaker 2 (39:15):
Or even if you don't have children, but you've moved
around to chase one person's career and therefore the other persons.

Speaker 1 (39:20):
Have had to take a back step, and well, yeah,
any sitters like that. Yeah, there are definitely factors where
obviously splits are entitled, but this isn't one. And in
this situation, I just think, protect yourself. Now it's a
piece of paper. Go to a lawyer, Go to an
account and firm that has like whoever it looks after
your accounting. Sometimes they have lawyers attached that they can recommend.

(39:42):
It's so quick and easy. You say, hey, this is
what's mine right now, how do I ensure it? And
maybe it's a difference between they'll give you advice. It
might be the difference in saying, hey, let's move into
a family trust. Like the title of your property can
mean very different things in terms of protection. You could
put it into like a dependent. There are so many
options and you don't even have to tell him that.

(40:03):
I would be doing that before you have this conversation.
To be honest, I would be making sure that this
is done so that when you do bring up if
you bring it up, it's happened. It's not a discussion.
He can't fight you on it. It's happened. You've only
been together five or six months, but you think he's
great and he's going to be hanging around, so like
it's just smart. We as women need to protect ourselves

(40:24):
in every single aspect, and you're fucking hustled and you're
killing it, so retain it.

Speaker 2 (40:28):
Yeah, I completely agree, And I just overarchingly think, don't
necessarily assume that it's going to be an awkward conversation
because it might not. He might pleasibly surprise you and
be like, yeah, no, I feel exactly the same.

Speaker 1 (40:37):
It shouldn't be. Yeah, if it is awkward. Yeah, If
I had to say that to Ben and Ben was like, well,
hang on, Like I want to make sure that if
we split up, I get everything, I'd be like, Sue,
you're okay. This is a little bit different. To give
you a little background to my family, I am married
with a six year old daughter from a previous marriage.
Now my new husband is amazing. He adores my daughter

(40:57):
so much you wouldn't even know that he wasn't her
bike logical dad. And we're having another baby in November.
So they're very beautiful, solidified family. My in laws were
really great for the first few months, but we have
had a few issues come up, and I want to
know what your opinion is on this very particular scenario.
My daughter was having to sleepover with my in laws,
who she absolutely adores. Now, I found out whilst they

(41:19):
had her sleeping over that my husband's mom's nephew, So
the daughter's stepdad's nephew, mom's nephew. Sorry, okay, yes, so
basically a young family member on this stepdad's side. Yes, yep.
So this nephew had come over and also had to

(41:40):
sleep over. Now he is nine and my daughter is six.
We found out that they slept in the same bed
in a room upstairs together and the parents in laws
were sleeping downstairs. So it's like, I guess, look at
it in a way of almost I guess the kind
of form of cousins having a sleepover, but cousins from
different sides. Yeah, six and nine, and they've been putting

(42:02):
the same bed upstairs. When we confronted them and said, hey,
like this isn't cool, what's going on, they basically implied
that we were being dramatic, and they refused to accept
that we weren't okay with it. They did not apologize.
They think that we are being dramatic and like taking
this out of context. Just to add on, when my
husband picked her up, he walked into the room and
they were watching movies and TV shows in the bed together,

(42:25):
not supervised, and the nephew didn't even recognize who my
husband was, just to set the context of them not
being like super close family members. And so basically she's saying,
I feel like the parents are gas lighting. Have been like,
it's cool, you're being dramatic, like this is a normal thing. Oh,
I cannot be more on your side. I'm outraged for you. Yes,

(42:47):
pretty well, I'm actually.

Speaker 2 (42:48):
So fucking fired up. And it's not because I'm implying
that the nephew is a bad kid or that kind
of thing.

Speaker 1 (42:53):
It is super stronger.

Speaker 2 (42:55):
It is so irresponsible for them to let children sleep
in the same bed when they hardly know each other,
and also not tell the parents.

Speaker 1 (43:05):
Or to ask totally.

Speaker 2 (43:07):
This would be such a different conversation if they had,
you know, said to you, hey, we also have agreed
to mind, Johnny, are you okay with the fact that
we've only got one spare room they will be sharing
a bed together. Like if that was a conversation with
you first play on that you'd be like, no, yeah,
because you're able to actually.

Speaker 1 (43:23):
Consent to the situation.

Speaker 2 (43:25):
The fact that this has happened retrospectively and they don't
see a problem with that is fucking wild to me.

Speaker 1 (43:30):
I'm so angry for you because a vulnerable child. And
again I'm not implying that this kid is a bad
kid or that he would ever do anything wrong. I
don't know him. You just don't know. You just don't know.

Speaker 2 (43:40):
And the fact that your child is being put in
an environment that you have no control over and they
think it's okay that they can just make decisions for
you for where your child is going to be unsupervised.

Speaker 1 (43:53):
In a bed in a sleeping arrangement is crazy. Yeah,
And if we just peel this back to like the basics,
it doesn't really matter what they think. You're the parent
and you've set the rules. You do not want or
think it's okay for your child to sleep unsupervised in
a bed with a stranger, whether or even if it's
not a stranger, even if it was a cousin, she

(44:14):
was really close to you and you all knew them
as the parent. If you say no, they have to
respect that. The fact that they're arguing the point and
almost gaslighting you into saying you're overreacting, and like calm down.
That's an issue in itself, right, and so I just
want to validate that and say whatever you say goes.
But apart from that, you're not being over dramatic. It's
absolutely warranted to feel like that. And I feel sad

(44:38):
for you now that it's obviously going to fracture your
relationship with his family, like with your in laws. But
I just wonder what your husband has said, like how
far he has gone with it. Is he backing you
up in that situation. He obviously feels uncomfortable. If he
came back and said, look, they were watching TV in bed,
I mean, what are you going to do other than
remove your daughter from that situation, not let her stay
over anymore. And I think it's funny because it's only

(45:03):
as an adult in the last couple of years that
I've really realized the dangers that can be attached with sleepovers.
And I say that because I had sleepovers all the
time as kids, kids sleeping at my house, be sleeping
at their house, and they weren't like there were never
strangers there. But it wasn't something that was ever I
don't know, I'd have to ask my parents. I don't

(45:24):
think it was ever something that was a worry to them.
I think it's like maybe we didn't have the same
level of access to just how much is going wrong
in the world as we do now, so we're more
hyper aware of what's happening. But it's sad because some
of the best memories of my life are at those sleepovers.
But we can't put our head in the sand and
pretend the things that are happening in these environments aren't happening. Absolutely,

(45:45):
and again I'm not implying that your family are creditors
or even that this little boy is like I wonder
if I would feel exactly the same if it was
a little girl, like if it was a niece who
had stayed over. But the truth is I would.

Speaker 2 (45:56):
I just I think that this comes down to consent,
and it down to protection of children and you being
aware of the environment that that child is in. And
I agree with you, Britt, like sleepovers were just the best.
I used to have them every single weekend as a kid,
And to be fair, there were probably kids like a
lot of the time I would stay at a friend's
house and they would have siblings who would also have,

(46:17):
you know, be staying at the house, and it just
so happened that a lot of my friend's siblings were
also older than them.

Speaker 1 (46:23):
So I guess there were a lot of dynamics.

Speaker 2 (46:26):
Like I have a brother, so there would have been
times where I was having a sleepover with a friend,
and then he was also having sleepovers with a friend,
and so those boys would have been in the equation
as well.

Speaker 1 (46:36):
And I guess it's not.

Speaker 2 (46:37):
Until, like you said, it's not until I've been an
adult that I'm like, oh, that could have gone wrong.
Should have been a conversation. Like you know, I'm lucky
I had fantastic people around me.

Speaker 1 (46:47):
And but I wonder if our parents were having those conversations,
you know, I wonder if, like so, my sister or
my brother would have people sleep whatever when I did
as well, all right, I wonder if our parents were like, hey,
just so you know, BRIT's got some people over as well,
and Dane's got some people over, Mitch has got some people. Ever,
Like I wonder if they were hyper aware enough to
like have those conversations, then I don't know if they

(47:07):
would have.

Speaker 2 (47:09):
Maybe we put back maybe this is a generational thing,
and I want to give them a little bit of
grace for the fact that they probably just grew up
and they weren't as aware of what some of the
dangers of these environments.

Speaker 1 (47:19):
And I know that that sounds horrible.

Speaker 2 (47:21):
I know it's like it's taking something that is such
a small percentage statistically.

Speaker 1 (47:27):
And applying it to the rule for everyone. But when
it comes to the protection of children, I don't give
a shit. I don't care that it's not statistically likely
to be the case.

Speaker 2 (47:35):
Like if there's one group that I will get so
fired up about and think that we need to go
above and beyond its innocent children.

Speaker 1 (47:43):
Yeah, at the end of the day, this is a
really easy conversation for me, Like we could get so
in depth in it, and I don't want to sound
like we're party poopers, but it's just the fact of it,
Like it's it's up to you as a parent what
you want to allow. And maybe you're more comfortable in
the future for sleepovers with kids at your house, but
then you're depending on those parents being comfortable and it's
a case by case situation, but this one absolutely like
you are not overacting. You need to set the boundaries

(48:06):
with your parents in laws, and if you don't trust
that they're going to follow through. You just can't send
them there anymore. Send us your parents in law's phone
number and we'll give them a call. Absolutely, are they
are in the wrong here.

Speaker 2 (48:16):
I rarely feel so one hundred percent about situations, you know,
like I usually try and see where they're coming from.

Speaker 1 (48:24):
But I am just so wholeheartedly on your side. And
we are not parents, obviously, but we have nieces and
nephews and stuff. But we asked, yes, our video editors,
she's got two little kids, and we said, you know,
how do you feel about sleepovers? She's like, never, I
would never let my kids have a sleepover. They could
if she knows them down the track when they're older,
maybe kids could sleep over at her house on different situations.

(48:46):
But I just think that that is probably more of
the general consensus these days, like people are more leaning
into not having those sleepovers unless there's that really tight
inner core circle of your friends. Like the people that
I used to sleepover, they're probably it wasn't everyone, they're
probably five friends. We were friends, we're best friends all
through school. But again that doesn't really matter because you

(49:08):
don't know the families, you don't know the people that
are coming into that house and yeah, it's like, fuck
you do you man, Like you're the parents and it's
your family. You do whatever you want to to protect
your children. Hmm. Absolutely, rip to the sleepover, r ip
to the Humble sleepover.

Speaker 2 (49:23):
That makes me sad though, like because they were such
good experiences. I think it's just about knowing. This to
me is not actually about the sleepover. It's about the
fact that they didn't let you know what was happening.

Speaker 1 (49:32):
So because then you're not in control.

Speaker 2 (49:34):
Of that, you know, making up whether you're okay with
your kid being in that environment. So it doesn't sound
to me like you're against sleepovers. I think that you
would be four sleepovers if you knew the kids and
you knew the people who were going, like the adults
who were going to be around your child.

Speaker 1 (49:48):
Rip to the sleepovers were strangers. Yeah, that's crazy.

Speaker 2 (49:53):
Anyway, if you have an opinion on this, you can
let us know on YouTube in the comments. You can
comment on Spotify, you can message. We always put our
asking cut questions up on Instagram so you can let
us know what you think. Maybe you disagree, maybe you
think that we're being a bit too Molly kodily of children.

Speaker 1 (50:09):
And maybe you think that you know everyone's gone soft.

Speaker 2 (50:12):
Who knows?

Speaker 1 (50:12):
And that is that's the thing. Everyone has a different opinion.
We love that. We're here for it. We welcome the opinions.
But one thing we'll ask you to do is go
and subscribe to YouTube. All our videos, longs and shorts,
all the little clips are on YouTube. So that's that's
a lot the place to be at the moment. So
make sure you go hit subscribe and leaves the common
over there. Keep your accidentally unfiltered's coming in and you'll
ask uncut questions. You'll always be anonymous. That's it. You

(50:34):
send them to us on Instagram at Life Uncut Podcast.

Speaker 2 (50:37):
You can check them into our Facebook group Life Uncut
Discussion Group, or you can actually email them to us
as well at hello at Life Uncut podcast dot com.

Speaker 1 (50:44):
Not gonna lie. We prefer the dms.

Speaker 2 (50:48):
It is easier to collate from there, but you know,
you do you however you wish them to us.

Speaker 1 (50:52):
You know the great mom Ty dot teo dogt your
friends and share love because we love love. Let me
hang them here because she sucked me on the board
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