September 5, 2025 • 43 mins
It's our weekly round up! The best of the week from our National radio show THE PICKUP.
What's on the show:
- Britt & Laura chat about that millionaire that was caught stealing a hat from a child
- Britt reckons she saw a ghost in her bedroom this morning
- The Bird Test might be the best experiment for how long your relationship will last
- Laura came across a very questionable Home Health Hack (pls don't try this at home)
- People were MAD about Maya's first birthday for some reason
- What's your secret talent?
- This woman wants her Grandma Name to be Big Mama
- Lola is making very questionable threats
- and Father's Day Dad Jokes!
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
This episode was recorded on cameragle Land. Hi guys, and
a welcome back to another episode of Life. I'm cut,
I'm Laura, I'm Brittany, and this is well if you're
just joining us, this is actually to pick up where
we package up the best of our radio show. We
bring it here for you. Look, we do every week.
Speaker 2 (00:19):
I every week seem to talk about something that Laura
doesn't want me to talk about.
Speaker 1 (00:22):
And this week it's ghosts. It's not that I don't
want you to talk about I just don't necessarily believe
in them. Yeah. Last week, oh, she's talking about aliens.
This week goes, I can't win your band from bringing content. Now, well, I'm.
Speaker 2 (00:34):
Pretty sure something happened in my bedroom. I think that
there is something in there that shouldn't be what I go.
Speaker 1 (00:41):
I don't know how to spell that one out for
you there, Laura, I'm pretty sure, I Saura, I go
through some description after me living in the apartment that
britt lives in, because if you're new to the point,
I always say this every time, but like, I feel
like this setup is necessary for dad of an apartment
I moved in. Yeah, so I lived there for a
couple of years prior to britt living there and now
so combine, I think we both lived there for like
(01:01):
almost six years combined. Yeah, I've been there for ages.
Yeah three years. Well yeah, I was there for three
years because I had Mali, and then you were there
for three six hours. Yeah. Wow, good for you. It
is probably time for me to move on. But in
six years, all of a sudden, Brittin now thinks it
is haunted by ghosts.
Speaker 2 (01:18):
Ghost don't just show themselves the second you walk in, Laura.
It's not like, hey, welcome to the apartment.
Speaker 1 (01:22):
I'm a ghost. I live here.
Speaker 2 (01:23):
Like that's not how ghosts were. And I know that
because they told me.
Speaker 1 (01:27):
Okay, we did get into ghost stories. The one in
that apartment I might not be behind, but you have
other ghost stories. I'm here for Well, if.
Speaker 3 (01:34):
It's not a ghost, it was a mini UFO in
my room, so you pick.
Speaker 1 (01:38):
What it is. Also, I don't know. We did this
break on radio and then the more I thought about it,
I was like, oh, maybe there is a problem with
my child. So Lola said, you know how has kids
sometimes say like scary, weird shit like that they shouldn't say,
or they'll be like I want to kill you. And
you're like, you don't mean that. You don't know what
that means. It's just saying that. I how they do. Like,
for example, Lola came home from daycare recently and she
(02:01):
was like, Mommy, get my drink bottle. And I was like, no,
you can say please, and she goes, please get my
drink bottle. I'm gonna kick you in the balls, and
I was like, you're four and I don't have balls,
And where did you even hear that? I think that's okay,
But I feel like saying you need to kill someone's
next level, right. Well yeah, look, to be fair for context,
she didn't say she was gonna kill someone. She just
said she wanted to die them. So I think it's
(02:22):
the same. But also it kind of sounds cute when
it's coming out of a four year old's mouth. I
think we know where she was going with it. I
want to die used. I don't think she wants to
tie die shirt or dye hair.
Speaker 2 (02:30):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (02:30):
So look, Lola said something very questionable about one of
her care cares. I don't want to like say anything
that could potentially be a lawsuit, yeah, or that I
don't I also don't want to have a target on
her back. I don't want this care. I don't want
this care to know that Lawla doesn't like them if
you put a target on her back, Like all Laura's
friends are gonna hear and they're all gonna target her. Nah,
(02:52):
she's fun, She's that kid, will stand up for herself.
She's got no worries. Anyway, let's get into it, guys,
lawsy laws laws Anita.
Speaker 2 (03:02):
Did you see what went down at the US Open
over the weekend, So obviously that is the Tennis Grand Slam.
Speaker 1 (03:08):
If you're not somehow across what the US Open.
Speaker 2 (03:10):
Is, there is this footage of this CEO grown man
that has gone absolutely bonkers online. So after one of
the matches, I think it was maybe in the second round,
there is a Polish tennis player that was playing.
Speaker 3 (03:22):
His name is Camille.
Speaker 2 (03:23):
Meijak, and he was like, they go over after they
finish their match and they sign autographs and whatever else.
So there's this kid that's about ten or eleven that's
hanging over the site to try and get this famous
tennis players autograph, and somebody from the other side.
Speaker 1 (03:37):
Of the court is filming.
Speaker 2 (03:39):
Because this is what you do, right, you film famous
people that you like. And so this lovely tennis player
signing autographs takes his own cap off that he just
played in, so it's obviously sweaty. It's what people want, right,
So he gives it to this super fan ten year
old boy, and the boy's ecstatic. But the boy only
has it for like three point three seconds it's in
(04:01):
his hands, and then this grown man next to him
that must be like, I don't know, forty five fifty
years old, snatches it from this ten year old boy
quickly gives it to his wife, who stuffs it in
her bag and they just try and do a runner,
and this ten year old boys like crying out after them.
Speaker 1 (04:16):
Like, hey, what are you doing? That's my my hat back.
Speaker 2 (04:18):
The tennis player didn't see it happen, so he just
like walks off.
Speaker 1 (04:22):
What did everyone else in their stand to? Because I
have seen this, well, I think it happened to quickly.
Speaker 2 (04:27):
If you're there in person, I don't think you would
see it and it would have the same effect.
Speaker 1 (04:30):
But the video has gone bonkers. Anyway.
Speaker 2 (04:32):
This guy, I was about to say, this poor guy,
no stuff him, but he has received this onslaught of
hate that. Apparently he has had to deactivate his Instagram.
Speaker 1 (04:41):
Yeah, because the internet does what the Internet does. They
tracked out in these people and we have a cold
Play saga all over again.
Speaker 2 (04:47):
Well, there are people calling him a sack of garbage,
a common thief, a primitive scammer, a shameful jerk. Now
this is where it gets interesting. I think grain of
salt here. But apparently this ceo he was tracked down
is the CEO of a big paving company. His name,
I'm gonna butcher this.
Speaker 1 (05:06):
It's Polish. It is Pyota Sherk. So you can all
go and stalk him yourself and send him hate mail.
Speaker 2 (05:12):
Yeah, this is what his apparent statement was. Now it
hasn't been verified, but he said allegedly it's all about
the famous hat.
Speaker 1 (05:22):
Yes I took it, Yes I did it quickly.
Speaker 2 (05:24):
But as I've always said, life is first come, first serve.
I understand that some people might not like it, but please,
let's not make a global scandal out of the hat.
Speaker 1 (05:34):
It's just a hat and if you were faster, you
would have it. Okay, can't be real. So there's so
many passes. Firstly, also, so horrible to steal something like
that from a kid who's next to you, Like the
fact that this was called on camera the guy's an asshole.
There's so much about this that is reminiscent to the
whole Coldplay saga of a month ago. In a moment
(05:55):
now where the Internet gets angry, we find out that
it's a wealthy millionaire CEO, which we like to hate
on any and so then you kind of take them down.
But the thing is, I don't know if you remember,
during that cold Play saga, there was all these statements
that were generated and were circulating from the apparent ex
wife of the CEO because she left him and she
was all empowered, and her daughter as well. Yeah, and
(06:16):
it turned out that all of these were totally fake,
like just had been put out on social media as
the official statement from the wife or the girlfriend whoever.
And I think it's the same thing for this, Like
no CEO with even one ounce of like, I don't know,
some sort of EQ is gonna say it's just a hat.
If you were faster, you would have it. He's a
(06:37):
ten year old kid. The kid is as fast as
a kid.
Speaker 2 (06:39):
Yeah, But also we say that like no CEO would
have an EQ like that well he does. We saw
him take the hat from a child, but I snatched
it from the child, and like when you watch the
footage back and okay, I think we've established a statements.
Probably AI not real. But going back to the incident,
what grown man uels from a child in like to
(07:02):
the level of like in front of a national crowd.
You know what's on television, you know what's filmed.
Speaker 1 (07:06):
You're like, that is wild. Yeah, I think though for me,
that's just someone who thought they could get away with it.
Like people do shitty things every day because they think
they can get away with it. Now, I mean, fortunately
and unfortunately if you're that crappy person you like, so
many things are filmed. Everyone has an iPhone and everything
gets cap shitted if you're going to do something that's
like so petty. And but also they kind of like
(07:28):
morally not okay, like the world will come for you,
The internet will come for you. They are visual ands
out there and you just can't get away with stuff anymore.
Speaker 2 (07:35):
Well, the little kid had the last laugh, because the
internet does do what the Internet did. The tennis player
heard about it through the news. He put his own
Instagram out saying somebody helped me. I did not see
this happen. Someone helped me track down this child, and
they found the child, and he sent him a bunch
of more stuff, and he has the tennis player has.
Speaker 1 (07:52):
Made up for it. So like, at the end of
the day, it ends well. But also like just don't
be a jerk. That's some moral of the story.
Speaker 2 (07:58):
Now, last week on the show, and Laura, You're gonna
hate that I'm about to talk about.
Speaker 1 (08:02):
This, But last week on the show, I already know
what it is.
Speaker 2 (08:04):
We're talking about aliens and like UFOs and if people had.
Speaker 1 (08:08):
Ever had those really weird and wonderful sightings.
Speaker 2 (08:11):
Because I think it's a little bit ignorant and naive
of us to think that we are the only people
in this universe.
Speaker 3 (08:18):
I think if we can exist, someone else can exist.
Speaker 1 (08:20):
Yes, I know, but some of the content that you're
bringing is questionable in terms of like, like aliens exist.
You're sitting in the corner of the studio with a
tinfoil hat on.
Speaker 2 (08:30):
I haven't said they exist, but I am open to
it and I love to hear other people's stories. This morning,
something happened to me in my own house, and I
just cannot explain it now. I want to get your
take on it, just to set the scene. I have
seen ghosts.
Speaker 1 (08:44):
Before, so.
Speaker 3 (08:47):
Like that is something that I have spoken about over
the years.
Speaker 2 (08:50):
I think if I counted them, I've probably seen seven
in my entire life.
Speaker 1 (08:53):
And I am in my early to mid to late thirties.
So this morning, I was in my room. I hadn't
put my blinds.
Speaker 2 (09:02):
Up yet, like I wake up early to get ready
for a big day work, and I hadn't. My dog
was in my room, Delilah, she was sleeping in my bed.
I had put my bedside lamp on. Now this is
important because the lighting was quite dark and dull still,
because the only thing lighting in the room was a
lamp and a little tiny bit of light coming through
the on suite. So I went into the shower in
my on suite, and I keep the light on in
(09:23):
the on suite, and I keep the door open so
I can see out from my shower, I can see
into my room. I was showering as normal, and then
I see it was like a mini lightning strike in
my room, like this huge flash, really bright flash of light.
Speaker 1 (09:39):
I'm talking three meters away from me. It's not like
I don't.
Speaker 2 (09:42):
Live in a mansion in the west wing where I'm like,
is that something you know?
Speaker 1 (09:45):
It's like, this is the don't you just think it
could have been like someone opening a window and the
light reflecting alone, as in like like apartment across reflecting
light into yours. The blinds were down, That's what I'm saying.
There was nothing else in the room. There's no light
coming into the room. Delilah was lighting a joint, so
no joint doesn't have an electric shop.
Speaker 2 (10:04):
But anyway, so this lightning bolt comes down and I
was like, what was that? And then Delilah growed my
dog and I was like, she has also just witnessed something.
Something happened in my room this morning, and I can't
explain it now. I don't know if I've put these
feelers out to the world because we were talking.
Speaker 1 (10:19):
About like aliens and ghosts they're coming for you. What
if they heard what if they were like, oh, she
might be down for this. I'm going to go into
a room this morning. You are banned from bringing content.
I don't believe me. I believe you that maybe the
light had a weird short circuit. I don't know, like
the lamp did. Who knows, Britt, I don't know. Some
(10:40):
things can't but some things can't be explained. I understand.
Speaker 2 (10:44):
I was a non believer until I could no longer
pretend it wasn't happening. Like I didn't believe in ghosts
until I saw it.
Speaker 1 (10:51):
You have a very good story like you. I mean
this one I'm on the fence about. But you do
have one lightning bolt. The lightning bolt story, I'm not
convinced her. I haven't quite joined the Illuminati with you.
But the other one you have about seeing a girl
walk across the road, Yeah, it's pretty.
Speaker 2 (11:06):
I mean, now you have to tell it obviously. Yeah,
I mean it takes a bit of a darker turn.
This one's not as happy. But like one of my
sister's really good friends passed away when she was only
like nineteen or twenty years old, and so I was
twenty three. She passed away unexpectedly, and so anyway, the
flash forward a huge amount of time. I am just
driving to work on a normal day, and I have
(11:29):
to stop on this really busy street for this girl
to cross the road.
Speaker 1 (11:34):
And I look across the road at who I'm stopping for,
and it was this point.
Speaker 2 (11:38):
It was like a four way kind of mini highway,
like I never had to stop there for anyone. And
I looked across the road as this girl was walking,
and it was like time stood still.
Speaker 1 (11:47):
And it was like slow motion.
Speaker 2 (11:48):
And this girl had this really happy, bubbly personality, and
she was like she used to walk with a really
specific walk where she'd like bounce on her toes and
she was walking across slow motion, and it wasn't a ghost.
I could see her and I watched her slow motion.
When she got in front of my car, she looked
at me and she smiled this huge smile, and then
(12:10):
she looked away and kept walking. And it was my
sister's friend. Let's call her Sarah. That's not her real name, but.
Speaker 1 (12:15):
I was like, that is Sarah. I was shaking.
Speaker 2 (12:18):
I had to pull over, and so I pulled over
and I messaged my sister and I said, this is
so weird. I need to tell you something. I've just
had to stop and cross the road and I said,
I've just seen Sarah. I said, she walked across the road,
she looked at me and she smiled, and I said,
I feel like I need to tell you that she
was happy, and my sister called me crying and she said,
(12:40):
do you know today's her one year anniversary? And we
the friends were at her gravesite and I had no
idea none. You just can't make that stuff up. And like,
when something like that happens, what.
Speaker 1 (12:51):
Do you do? I mean, I've been very skeptic of
a lot of stories, but when you told me that one,
that is one that I yeah, I mean, like, what
do you say? How do you even? Yeah? Yes? Anyway,
so back to the flash of life. No, that one.
I can't get around that one.
Speaker 2 (13:02):
Well, if anyone knows what that could be, I'm open
to calls.
Speaker 1 (13:05):
Brittany lives in an old apartment building and had electoral
short circuit this morning and it pissed off de laalah.
Speaker 2 (13:11):
Have we got to the bottom of everyone like, oh,
you just wait, I'm going to find someone.
Speaker 1 (13:16):
You're such a skeptic. My goal is to turn you.
The last time we had Ghostbusters on this show, they
told me I was having a boy. It's not a goat.
Speaker 4 (13:24):
Now.
Speaker 1 (13:24):
Have you heard about the relationship test the bird test?
Speaker 2 (13:28):
Briefly, yes, but I've heard of where it actually stemmed from.
Speaker 1 (13:32):
Wow, you know more than me. I'm the one who
brought the break.
Speaker 2 (13:34):
No gotman, I've heard the gotman that he came up
with a theory, but TikTok's taken it and rolled with it.
Speaker 1 (13:38):
Okay, yes, that is exactly it. So if you haven't
heard of what the bird test is, it's a way
in which you can I mean, like, there's no science
behind it. Please don't leave your partner if they fail
the bird test, but you can test them on how
invested they are in the small moments of your day.
So basically the idea is like you might be in
the car driving with your partner, or you might be
I don't know about the park or something, and you're like, hey,
(14:01):
look a bird, and obviously, you know you want to
make a little bit more specific. Maybe you say you
saw I don't know, a pigeon. Whatever. It is, still
no but like you know, that's usually you're not just
gonna be like, hey, look, honey, a bird. But the
specificness of it is something that they will either lean
into it as a bid for connection or they will
be like a bird, like who cares. And it's this
(14:23):
idea of like leaning into the small moments of your
partner's day or leaning away from the small moments if
your partner's day is what looks like for a partner
who's really committed.
Speaker 2 (14:32):
Yeah, and so this comes from the psychologist doctor John
Gotman that he's the one inspired the theory. But yes,
it's the idea of like a successful relationship, you should
be able to tap in and tap out to those
micro moments that your partner might bring to you.
Speaker 1 (14:45):
And I mean it doesn't do about a bird.
Speaker 2 (14:46):
It could be about anything, the tiniest part when they
want to tell you about their day, do you look
up from your phone and engage and ask a question
or do you say that's nice, sweety and move on.
Speaker 1 (14:54):
So of course I saw this on TikTok and I
was like, well, I should probably test this out of
my husband. I should see if he's committed, because now
that we're having another baby in three weeks, I was like,
what better time to really make sure that the relationship
has got legs. So he did the bird test I did.
I did. I like birds. Just want to preface this,
I quite enjoy a bird. I'll point burn I'll point
a bird out to my husband every so often. He's
also a good sport Matt. I think I talk a
(15:17):
lot of grubbish to him, and he really entertains most
of it. So how did it go? It actually went
pretty good. I think your past I have a listened
to this. Hello, Hi, honey, what are you doing work?
I had to call someone and tell them I was
just at a cafe and the most beautiful glar just
(15:37):
came and sat down right next to me. A gala,
a gala in the city. Yeah, it's crazy. It was
so cute. What did you do? Nothing? It flew away,
but I just it was I mean, it was so close.
Did just eat it? But I did feed a bush turkey?
(15:58):
You said, a bush turkey? Oh great? I love you,
Bless his soul. He still doesn't know what happened, though,
But do.
Speaker 2 (16:16):
You know what, he passed the test because he has
no idea what went on?
Speaker 1 (16:20):
You just cold call you when you work day to
tell me you saw a bird and he was engaged.
You don't see glars in the city very often, do Truly,
you're feeding pictures Usually you're crazy picture. Do you know
what I'm more concerned about by doing this is the
fact that he clearly just thinks I'm insane. Normally and
didn't question it at all. He was like, Yep, that's
something my wife would do. Well.
Speaker 2 (16:39):
Apparently, thirty three percent of people that did this test
like their partners didn't pass the test.
Speaker 1 (16:44):
That's pretty high start. Thirty three percent of people are
checked out. I thought only thirty three percent made it.
Speaker 3 (16:49):
Rest Possibly I possibly read that backwards.
Speaker 1 (16:51):
I think she did.
Speaker 2 (16:52):
No, eighty six percent turned towards each other for a
bit fit connection, and only thirty three percent made I
didn't get a producer grade.
Speaker 5 (17:00):
So of people that lasted happily for twenty years, eighty
six percent of them all the time are like turning
in to be like, oh honey, love that bird.
Speaker 1 (17:08):
And then of the people that.
Speaker 5 (17:09):
Didn't, only thirty three percent of them made it.
Speaker 1 (17:13):
Wow, Grace, I will say that the stats you wrote
here were not easy to read, but I'd done producted, Grace.
I'm glad we got to the bottom of the bird.
All Right's irrelevant, Matt past Everyone go home and test
your husbands and your wives. Let's see, let's really mess
up some relationships here, Britt. I need to get your
thoughts and opinions on this, because I'm basically a doctor.
Is that one?
Speaker 4 (17:32):
No?
Speaker 1 (17:33):
Absolutely not. I don't not think that you can claim that.
But you did work in hospital for a long time.
People might not know this about you. H thirteen years yeah,
well radiographer.
Speaker 2 (17:41):
Yeah, diagnostic radiographer fifteen years left the really good work
of being a radiographer to come here and talk crap
on the radio.
Speaker 1 (17:49):
What a noble career change. Look. The reason why I
wanted to speak about this is there's a woman I follow.
Her name is Jen Hamilton, and she's a nurse. She's
from the US, and she posted something that I I
deal with all the time, but I have never seen
someone do this before, and I am shook us to
my core that this is a way in which some
people solve the issue of having inflame taste buds. Okay here,
(18:12):
I know, all right, Okay, come on the journey with me,
wild Ryn. So you know how sometimes you'll wake up
in the morning or like over the day, and you'll
just have one taste bud that gets inflamed, like so
like on the tip of your tongue. You have like one, yes,
you do. It's an ulca. It's not an ulca. It's
not like it's not like a concave thing it's just
like an inflame little dot, a white dot. I have
(18:32):
one literally right now.
Speaker 3 (18:33):
Yeah, but isn't that just a tongue auldsong.
Speaker 1 (18:35):
No, it's not a tongue alds. It's an inflamed taste bud.
If you get them on the reg you will know
they are so deeply annoying. Like once you have one,
it's like all you can kind of feel. You've gotta
talk in a certain way to kind of move your
teeth around your tongue, and I'm pretty sure it's awful. No,
it's not an ulcer. Just enjoin me on this story. Okay,
even Nurse Gen says it's an inflame taste bud. Yeah,
(18:55):
but tell us what else Nurse Gen did. So the
comment section of this is why. But let me just
kind of set up what she did. So Jen gets
a pair of tweezers and she grabs the taste bud, which,
if you've ever had an inflame taste bud, I'm talking
about little tiny ones. She grabs it and she pulls
it straight off like like she's pulling out a blackhead, right,
and then it bleeds for a second, and within twenty
(19:18):
seconds she's like it's gone. No, pain, completely gone.
Speaker 2 (19:22):
I do not believe that is no pain. Think of
how much it hurts if you accidentally bite your tongue.
Speaker 1 (19:26):
And she said this, She said, warning, if there's one
thing about me that I'm not going to live with,
it's a swollen taste bud. You were getting yoinked and
you were gone. That's disgusting. The problem is is like
I watched this and I was like absolutely horrified. I was,
oh my god, that to me is so painful because
I do get them, and I was like, the thought
of ripping them out sounds like irrational. It was the
comment section that blew my mind the amount of people
(19:48):
who were like, am I the only one who didn't
know about swollen taste buds? For one's why I didn't? Yeah?
And then other people are like, oh my god, I
thought I was a psycho for doing this. But I
just rip them out and then they go away within seconds.
Someone else wrote that they clipped them off with a
pair of nail clippers. What is wrong with the world.
It's a taste bud. Let it live. Glad I'm not
the only one doing this. It's legitimate. This person wrote,
(20:12):
I've done this my whole life, it hurts so bad
for literally a minute, but way better than letting it
hurt and be swollen for four to five days. Are
we pulling off our own taste buds when they get swollen?
Speaker 2 (20:21):
Well apparently, but I mean ten minutes ago, I've never
even heard of it.
Speaker 1 (20:24):
I'm gonna try it next time because I get them
really often. I'm gonna I'm going to rip one off
a report pack.
Speaker 2 (20:29):
I actually don't think we should be advising ew I
just googled it.
Speaker 3 (20:33):
You get that those pussy little things on your tongue, not.
Speaker 1 (20:36):
Like that bad? Yeah, I've got one here. It's when
you have a lower moon system. I think immune system
when you run down my moon systems ammunity. I blame
pregnancy for everything at the moment. Guys, No, this.
Speaker 2 (20:47):
Person's attached to a piece of string and they're pulling
it off exactly.
Speaker 1 (20:51):
People pluck them off. People are cooked. Man, Just let
it leave, no, because it does hurt. And I've even
been speaking weird today because it hurts on the side
of my mouth. Anyone want to complic it? Okay, where's
the line? Like, if you can get your partner to
like pick your pimples in your black heads. Can you
get your partner to mine?
Speaker 2 (21:07):
No, that is the line, and anyone is doing that
to yourself or each other is disgusting.
Speaker 1 (21:12):
This is please, this is not medical advice. Laura is
not telling you to do this. If you do want
to go and look it up, though, go Jen Hamilton's
Instagram because she's a nurse. I trust her well, I
want I'll follow a nurse on Laura.
Speaker 2 (21:25):
I was shook by the general public's response on the
weekend to my niece Maya's first birthday.
Speaker 1 (21:32):
Why does the general public even weigh in on your
niece's birthday? Great question.
Speaker 2 (21:36):
So, my niece Maya turned one. I flew up north
to spend it with my sister and her, and they're
like a really small mini party, and I put some
photos on Instagram, you know, like happy first birthday to
my niece.
Speaker 1 (21:48):
Whatever.
Speaker 2 (21:49):
Do have a couple of kids. I mean, my niece
doesn't really do much. She can't even walk yet, so it's.
Speaker 1 (21:53):
But also, I said this the other week, I feel
like the first birthday party is a celebration for the parents,
for major a whole year of being a parent. That's
absolutely what it was.
Speaker 2 (22:04):
But Maya's quite advanced so her friends are a little
older than her.
Speaker 1 (22:07):
So she's what like thirty five, yeah, pretty much. No,
she was the youngest there.
Speaker 2 (22:12):
The other kids were like, I think the next youngest
kid was three. Then they were like five, six and seven,
because they were obviously like our friends' kids. Yeah, anyway,
so I put a foight up of her eating her
first birthday cake. Now it was like just a rainbow
cake that you can get from Woolies.
Speaker 1 (22:28):
I saw it. It's the iconic. Every parent will know it.
It's the rainbow like side cake. It's got white icing
on the outside. You cut it open, it's a rain
It's a classic. It's a kid classic.
Speaker 2 (22:37):
So she cut it open, flipped it around, made it
into a butterfly, added.
Speaker 1 (22:40):
Some bits whatever, jazzed it up a bit.
Speaker 2 (22:42):
But it's like just has hundreds and thousands all over
it and inside rainbow and it's icing.
Speaker 1 (22:47):
It's just a delicious cake. It's full of sugar. Well
this is this is where this is going.
Speaker 2 (22:52):
And so I put the photo up, thought nothing about it,
and then I started to get some messages just sporadic
at the start, thought nothing of it and like ignored them,
like in my dms. Then they started to come in
way more frequently, people pretty gobsmacked that a one year
old would have a birthday cake with sugar. Like. The
messages started to be like, okay, sorry, is that kid friendly?
Speaker 3 (23:16):
And I was like, well, it's not toxic. She can
Can she consume me?
Speaker 1 (23:19):
Yes?
Speaker 2 (23:20):
Anyway, this came in more and more and more and more,
and then there were people saying you should have given
her a watermelon cake, people sending me pictures of it.
I am sorry, but there were people sending me literally
a watermelon that they cut and scoop it out and
then they put a candle in the child.
Speaker 1 (23:36):
People make a watermelon cake. Sorry, your poor child. Somebody
take that child away. Kids one, it doesn't know any different.
This is what I want to add on top of this.
Speaker 2 (23:45):
My sister Sherry is a nutritionist. She this is her life.
She knows what he's okay, she knows what he's good.
The child has never like Maya has never had sugar before.
Speaker 1 (23:55):
She doesn't eat sugar. Go off, queen, give get her
in one big hare.
Speaker 5 (23:58):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (23:58):
And so Sharon was like, again, oh my god, you've
never seen I tell you what, she had one taste
and you've never seen a kid want to eat so quickly.
I'm assuming that's the addictive nature of the sugar kicking
in and she never eats it. She's not gonna eat
it for the next year. But it's guys, if we
are living in a world where we cannot have a
birthday cake and you've got to have a piece of
do you know what watermelon is?
Speaker 1 (24:17):
It's water?
Speaker 3 (24:18):
Are you going to give your child water for their
first birthday?
Speaker 1 (24:21):
This is a real rant that I wasn't expecting from
you to because.
Speaker 2 (24:23):
I just A'm like, guys, let like, there is so
much going on in the world, let a kid have
a and like all the other kids want a birthday cake.
Speaker 1 (24:29):
They don't want watermelon, like it's a birthday. But also
you're like on Auntie Duty's and you're getting yelled at
even your legs not in my Cake't I get very defense?
Like the difference between this is people obviously just expect
more from you, brit because I've bought that, Because I've
bought that exact same cake for both my kid's birthdays,
for almost every single birthday on repeat. Well that's see
(24:51):
if they were one and I've never received a message
everyone's like, yeah, that's about right, Laura. I even covered
it and start sat.
Speaker 3 (24:57):
Laura's got no time to do anything. She would have
got that.
Speaker 1 (24:59):
I literally covered it. Yeah. I think it was Lola's
first birthday. I covered it in smarties and also things
that could be considered a choking hazard, and not one
single person message. Laura's like, what is that? You know
where you put Yeah? I just yeah, I just you know,
(25:19):
I like decorated with bits of lego, and everyone was like, yeah,
that's right up Laura's Sally, we joke. I put sparkles
in it. It's got like fireworks. It's gonna explode. I'm
a great mom, thank you, But I also you brought
this up. Don't attack me. That's right, that's right. The
birthday parties are for birthday partying. Let me live, Let
them live. If they want a cake, they can need
(25:39):
a cake. I feel like someone hurt you on the weekend.
Now we're talking about hidden secrets. So if you have
we're talking about secret talent secrets. Hidden secrets. Secrets are
usually hidden. Because I've lost the plot today, I actually have.
We're talking about hidden talents, and I know produced Grace,
you're a bit confused about this because I brought this
(26:00):
even though I forgot about what we're just talking about.
But I want to know what is your hidden talent?
Give us a call. The reason why I wanted to
talk about this is because the other night I was
just casually flicking through my stories on Instagram looking at
what my friends were up to, and Producer Grace you
popped up. There. You were, you popped up in all
your glory. And when I say all your glory, you
(26:22):
were in Stripper Hills on a stripper pole and you
were wearing not much scantily clad and you were doing
a full blown middle splits upside down. And I just
I've known you for so long now, like we spend
so much time together, and it took the wind out
of me. It anes did.
Speaker 2 (26:39):
I was not it.
Speaker 1 (26:41):
Do you know why, Laura? I got shocked. I was
so shocked. It's like, how have you kept this a
secret for so long? It's because you're not on her
close friends group. Okay, that's a lie. Laura is in
my close friends you haven't seen her talent.
Speaker 5 (26:53):
And I usually put my pole dancing stuff on there
because I have like relatives and bosses and stuff that followed.
Speaker 1 (26:58):
Me so you through that the window. This didn't you
were like, watch me do the middle splits and a
g string put that straight up on the main feed. No,
that was on close Friends. It wasn't. Did your main
feed that main feed at it? Your watches this?
Speaker 5 (27:11):
Yeah, And there are a few people in the office
that I got to see a real live reaction to
watching me do that, And I went, you.
Speaker 1 (27:15):
Know what, I'm going to pop this on close friends.
Speaker 2 (27:19):
Okay, you are very talented, so like, just to really
get the picture, she was upside down on the pole,
holding on by only her hands.
Speaker 3 (27:25):
Your legs were in the splits in the g banger.
Speaker 2 (27:28):
And then you did like a swifty flipp thing twirl
down the pole and you still made it look graceful.
Speaker 1 (27:33):
It was impressive. The reason why I was confused by
this is because you mentioned not so long ago, You're like, oh, yeah,
you know, I'm doing cold dancing. I've only just started,
and so like you know, when you see someone who's
just started pole dancing, they're particularly bad at it. So like,
I wasn't expecting a full middle split which I can
barely touch my toe. Actually I can't touch my toes
at this moment. Let's be real. But I was, I
mean pleasantly surprised. But also I don't understand why you've
(27:55):
been keeping this secret.
Speaker 5 (27:57):
It's a workplace. I wasn't just going to drop into
the split. It's in a workplace.
Speaker 1 (28:00):
Why not that sounds you know what we need?
Speaker 5 (28:03):
I mean, I can, but there's a lot of equipment around.
I don't want to damage anything.
Speaker 1 (28:06):
You are, Jeans, Could you do this?
Speaker 4 (28:08):
Gene?
Speaker 1 (28:08):
I reckon? I could? Could you do it quickly? Okay?
All right, all right, I'll hold the thought down. Oh
she's going down. Oh oh my god, holy holy, oh
my god. You really can do it? Oh, Jean, I've
got can you push yourself up? Putty hips pop out?
Speaker 2 (28:22):
Oh wow, we're actually absolutely putting that onto our socials, grit.
Speaker 1 (28:27):
Do you have a head and talent that you've kept
from the world? Do you know what I have?
Speaker 2 (28:31):
It's one that I I don't know if I wanted
to let people know that I had this talent because
I don't want to brag. But I can for the
sake of the show, I can tell you I can
do a seagull.
Speaker 1 (28:40):
Sound I like that you keep it that a secret,
but actually you have done that on the show before.
Have I Yeah, you busted it out once? Can you
give it to us again again? What haven't done well?
Warm up? I'll push the Micpriene away everyone, everyone across
the nation changes channel on the radio. That sounds pretty?
(29:01):
Was that a lead or not? Actually? Wasn't that good?
Wasn't it? Have I lost my talent? It wasn't convincing.
Don't be mean. Sorry, that's my one talent. Was it
not good? You've got other talents? Baby? No, I don't.
That's always got left. Actually, look the phone's been going up.
We've got Courtney on the line. Courtney, what's your hidden talent?
Speaker 4 (29:23):
So I can still, after years squirt breast milk out
of my good boob at least four to five meters
away from where I'm standing? How every time? Without fail?
Speaker 1 (29:33):
How LONGO did you stop breastfeeding?
Speaker 4 (29:36):
So I've not long stop with my youngest, but there's
six years between my two and I could still do
it five years after I had my elders.
Speaker 1 (29:42):
Oh my god, that's amazing. What do you mean you're
still producing milk without breastfeeding. I'm so confused. Some people do.
Speaker 4 (29:49):
My good bob can still go for miles and she
never stopped.
Speaker 1 (29:53):
Do you know what's so funny about this is like
every mom who's ever breastfed is like, oh yeah, yeah,
I know the good boob story. There's always one food that,
like your kid prefers to feed on, and then that
boob gets really good at making milk, and the other
one's just like this sad sack that hangs by the
side Britain. Literally, no, I was thinking.
Speaker 4 (30:12):
Good for when your husband won't stop snoring at not
like it is amazing, like the room and it's just
like one quid little squirt he doesn't know, but it's
so harmless and it just makes you feel so much
better about not sleeping at night.
Speaker 1 (30:25):
Oh my god, it's just hilarious. I have this moment
with my husband. This is years and years ago when
my first born was young and I was in the
bath and he came in. He was like fully clothed,
but he was just sitting on the loo having a
chat to me. And I said, I reckon, I could
squirt you with breast milk from here, and he said,
go for it. And not only did I squirt him,
but I squired it all up the wall on the
other side. You get some real reach with that stuff. Yeah,
(30:46):
I've seen it happen, not from you.
Speaker 4 (30:47):
But it can go everywhere, like almost an explosion sometimes,
especially when you're early breastfeeding days.
Speaker 1 (30:53):
Oh my god, breastfeeding.
Speaker 2 (30:54):
But I also have a boob I prefer but that's
for another day. All Right, we're going to take a
little bit of a switch here. We often talk about parenting,
but we're going to talk about grand parenting for a second.
Who gets to choose the name that a grandparent uses.
Speaker 1 (31:12):
I think it's open to the grandparents because otherwise you
end up with like multiple nanas or multiple nannies, and
like you know, sometimes you'll have the conversation of like,
all right, my mom wants to be Nana. Does your
mom want to be grandma or be nanny? And then
if they can kind of choose, Yeah, so Ellie, who
is my mother in law? She lives with us. It
(31:32):
kind of just worked out that both grandparents became nana,
and so now it's like Nana who lives with us,
Nana who doesn't live with us.
Speaker 2 (31:39):
We used to do that, but it be like you
use their names like Nana jam yes, yeah.
Speaker 1 (31:44):
Okay, So Ellie my mother in law, she wants to
be called Nelly, and my kids refuse to pick up
the word Nellie. They're like, no, you're not Nelly's. They're
not a rapper, You're not Nelly. Okay.
Speaker 2 (31:55):
So this has come off the back of a Reddit
thread online where one woman has I'm out asking, like,
m I the a hole because she's got little kids,
she's she's sorry, she's pregnant, she hasn't even.
Speaker 1 (32:06):
Birthed her child yet.
Speaker 3 (32:07):
And her own mother came out and said, I've decided
what I want to be called.
Speaker 1 (32:11):
I want to be.
Speaker 2 (32:12):
Called big Mama, not nana, not grandma, not grammy, whatever,
big mama.
Speaker 1 (32:19):
No, that's no, Well, the daughter, it's going to be
within reason. This is what the daughter has said.
Speaker 2 (32:24):
I told her nicely, I was uncomfortable with it because
I should be the only person who is even remotely
considered mama or any type of mama.
Speaker 1 (32:33):
She went into this.
Speaker 2 (32:33):
Whole spree about how she's the grandparent and she gets
to be called anything she wants, and that you need
to respect your elders.
Speaker 1 (32:40):
Oh my god, get a grip.
Speaker 2 (32:41):
No, it's coming to this discussion now of like who
bestows the name that the grandparent uses is it bestowed
upon the grandparent by their child, or does the grandparent
get to say, hey, this is what I'm comfortable with.
Speaker 1 (32:54):
Do you know what? Though, it kind of depends on
how present the grandparent is as well. See Mama is
going to be present, he is it? No, because I
think what happened with us is like, we just referred
to Nana as Nana. You know, we refer to my
mum as Nana because that's what we called our grandma.
You know, the kids spend way more time with us
than they do with Nana, so they would just start
(33:14):
saying Nana. I kind of feel like you can curtail
this even and the kids will just be like, why
does Nana keep calling herself big Mama. It's weird come
to big Mama. That doesn't like it a vibe it.
But that's kind of what happened in our house with
Ellie when Ellie was like, call me Nelly, but the
kids were like, no, you're Nana. That's weird. Does she
wear it like a gold grill?
Speaker 2 (33:35):
In our household, we have NJ, So my nana is NJ.
And that was she decided that anytime we'd call her Nana,
she would say NJ, and she would just drill it
into us. So that stands for Nana Jan. Well, she's
just ENJ to us now. But my dad is a
grampy or a popsicle or a kid Papa Smurf, so
he gets three names. I think it's cute to have
(33:58):
something that's like unique to your family, as long as
everyone is okay with it.
Speaker 1 (34:01):
Yeah, but there's a difference in this question. Okay, so
the grandma wants to be called big Mama. The mama
has said it's a no, and instead of just being like, oh, okay,
I'll come up with something else, she's like, gas, let
her own daughter, And she's like, well, I'm older, respect
your olders. No, I mean you do have to respect
your elders to some capacity. Yes, that flies when you're
a child. It's not when you're also an adult. You
(34:23):
don't just respect someone just because they're older than you.
That's not how it works. Said.
Speaker 3 (34:27):
I do think it's I don't know.
Speaker 1 (34:28):
I'm not a mom, so correct me if I'm wrong.
Speaker 2 (34:29):
I think it's a bit precious to say no one
else will have the name mama in their title because
I'm the only mama. I feel like my dad is
Papa Smurf which has papa in it as a dad.
Speaker 1 (34:39):
Call, like as in like, not many people are calling
their dad papa. They're calling their dad dad, you know,
so like I actually I don't necessarily disagree. My kids
call me mama. They don't call me mom, and so
I would find it weird if they were calling another
person mama mama. Yeah, just like I don't think Matt
would really appreciate if the kids were calling my dad dada,
big dadda. Like I don't know. I can understand why
(35:02):
it's need seriously, we're taking this neither neither. Actually I
can understand why it's weirded the mum out. But also
I think step aside Grandma. I know you're the grandma,
but you're not the mom. They're fighting words. Laura. I
say this, but then I'm also like Ellie leaving me.
Speaker 2 (35:18):
I need you. So Ellie can be called anything she
wants as long as she Ellie can wrap, Nellie can
be a rapper.
Speaker 1 (35:24):
I'll call you Nellie every day of the week. Just
never leave. So my youngest Lola, she's four years old
now almost five. I mean, I've described her on the
show before as being like the personality higher of our family,
which I feel like you need to stop describing her,
like I know, I don't think she's so funny, Like
she comes out with these one liners. She says really
inappropriate things, very energetic. She's like a little energizer bunny,
(35:46):
and she has like really good comedic timing, right, But
she also says some things and I'm like, oh, you
really shouldn't say that. You're gonna get yourself in trouble.
And I don't know whether it's just she feels safe
at home so she can push the boundaries, or she's
a psychopath, which one is it? I wish we were joking,
or she says these things maybe at school and I'm like,
that's gonna get you into a lot of trouble. Don't
(36:07):
say that. So she does sport, and she does she
goes to like daycare, and she has quite a few
adults in her life that have like caretaker roles, you know,
like whether it's a sporting activity or a school. And
I'm saying this because I want to make this very generic.
I do not want the person. You don't want the
person to know. I don't want the person who is
involved in this story to know that they are involved
in this story, because that's awkward for everyone. But Lola
(36:28):
comes home the other day from an unprescribed activity that
she did and she goes, Mummy, this real half. She goes,
I hate Sarah and I was like, oh, you hate Sarah.
She's like, I hate her and I was like, okay,
why do you hate her? She goes, she's always telling me, Lola,
don't do this, Lola, don't do that. She's always getting
cross down the knife and wait for it. And I
(36:50):
was like, oh, honey, she's just trying to keep you safe.
And she goes, yeah, well you know what I want
to do. I want to cut her finger off and
eat it. And I was like sorry, and she goes,
I want to dye her and cut her finger off
and eat it. And I was like, sweetheart, you're four,
you sweetart.
Speaker 2 (37:07):
That's murder and cannibalism and illegal in every country.
Speaker 1 (37:10):
I was like, I don't know if I just heard
what I think I heard anyway. Of course, that wasn't
home at the time, so of course the first thing
I did there was no I voice recorded me telling
him because I couldn't get on to him on the phone.
He was at work, and so I voice recorded and
I was telling him the story. I was like, baby,
you'll never believe what your daughter just said. And as
I'm telling him the story, Lola hears me and she goes,
(37:32):
who are you calling? And I was like, I'm calling
your father and she goes, oh, I thought you were
calling Sarah and I was like and I was like, no,
I'm not calling Sarah, and she goes, you should call her.
Tell her I want her to dye her and I'm
gonna cut her finger off and eat it. Oh my god,
it's crazy, right, But then listen to how cute it
sounds when it comes out of a four year old's mouth, and.
Speaker 2 (37:54):
Do what concerns I don't know if you should be
laughing at her?
Speaker 1 (38:04):
That's what I'm concerned about it. I'm like that, I
think there's a mishandling of this situation. It's like, then,
be real fighting words. I don't know. I don't know why,
I don't know where it's come from. I send it
to Matt and Matt was like, do you think we
should be concerned about this? There's not a normal response.
Speaker 2 (38:17):
Didn't you watch Jeffrey Dahmer documentary with her like there
were signs when he was.
Speaker 1 (38:20):
A child, there was ignore them. Now it makes me
concerned because every so often she like because she comes
in by a room at night time to get in
bed with me, and sometimes she's just like there's a dark,
ominous figure over the side of the bed, And I'm like,
what are you actually thinking, bro?
Speaker 2 (38:34):
Why you come for me for thinking there's ghosts and
wanting to talk about that.
Speaker 1 (38:37):
This is so much worse than that.
Speaker 3 (38:39):
There is some psychologist sitting in the car.
Speaker 1 (38:41):
Right now trying to call this line, being like, I
need to talk to Laura and Lola. I'll get them
on next week's show because we got to go. You know,
the school's gotta listen to wherever she went. Whatever this
unknown kids give her is, he's going to kick her out,
for sure. They're like spend Lola. She's just so cute
though that even when she says, really messed up. You
know you else was cute? Ted Bundy, he was not cute.
(39:04):
He was a hot cycle. That's rible. It is Father's
Day this weekend. I haven't organized anything yet.
Speaker 3 (39:12):
Well, I already gave my dad.
Speaker 1 (39:13):
A Father's dy present. Actually, well done, well done organized.
Speaker 2 (39:16):
Yeah, but I want to give all you dads out
there a present.
Speaker 1 (39:20):
Right now.
Speaker 2 (39:21):
I am going to give you the gift of the
ultimate dad jokes.
Speaker 1 (39:25):
Now. I love a dad joke.
Speaker 2 (39:27):
Shockingly, I'm not a dad, but I do love them.
I love a bad joke.
Speaker 3 (39:31):
And I feel like people need to be armed.
Speaker 1 (39:33):
With new jokes going into the weekend. The problem I
have is that, sorry, we keep you up, Laura. Wow, guys,
I'm about to have a baby. Okay, all I do
is yawn and have reflux. No, the problem with jokes
for me is like my brain does not retain them.
I hear them, I laugh, and then I just can
never recall them, whereas you're full of like my dad
(39:54):
is also very good at a dad joke.
Speaker 3 (39:56):
I reckon you'll know some of these laws, so if
you know, I'm try.
Speaker 1 (39:59):
The only one I have is the toilet paper one,
which I've told about ten times. Why did the four
year old? Why did the toilet paper roll down the hill?
Get to the bottom, get to the bottom?
Speaker 2 (40:07):
All right, ready, we're going to start with my favorite topic.
Speaker 3 (40:11):
Why are pirates pirates?
Speaker 1 (40:13):
Because they are? What's a pirate's favorite letter?
Speaker 2 (40:17):
Or you think that, but it would be the sea.
Speaker 1 (40:24):
It's not stupid, it is brilliant. All right.
Speaker 3 (40:26):
Well, where does a pirate go to get his hook?
Speaker 5 (40:29):
Nah?
Speaker 1 (40:30):
No, second hand store? Oh is this just going to
be a break on pirate jokes? Is that what this is?
Speaker 3 (40:38):
I wanted to start with that, but I'm done.
Speaker 2 (40:39):
Okay, So why can't you hear terodactyl going to the
bathroom because they don't go.
Speaker 1 (40:45):
To the bathroom.
Speaker 3 (40:47):
Well, besides the fact they're extinct, the p is silent.
Speaker 1 (40:50):
Oh that's true. Yeah, that's good, that's clever, clever.
Speaker 2 (40:55):
My wife told me to stop acting like a flamingo. No,
I knew it was time to put my foot down.
Speaker 5 (41:04):
Oh.
Speaker 2 (41:05):
Why should you never throw Grandpa's false teeth at a vehicle?
Speaker 1 (41:09):
Because it would be very silly. I don't know any
of these because you might dent show the car. Oh
that's terrible. That wasn't good. Produce a great a terrible one.
You might dent your car. You might I that blame
the one, terrible del Okay.
Speaker 3 (41:29):
Why do bees have sticky hair?
Speaker 1 (41:32):
I don't know, it's just happened. Honey. It's not funny.
Speaker 3 (41:35):
You're almost there because they use honey comb.
Speaker 1 (41:38):
Oh god, okay, my last I feel like we should
get people to call for this. This is probably more
now I've got my last one.
Speaker 2 (41:47):
This is my favorite joke, and I know you know it, Laura.
I used it on The Bachelor many years ago. It's
how I almost wanted to go off but didn't.
Speaker 1 (41:54):
Do You reckon that this was the thing that turned
him off. He was so close to choosing you, and
then you whipped out this terrible joke and he was like, Oh,
I can't do with that for the rest of my life.
Speaker 2 (42:02):
I brought it in really early. That's what actually sold him.
I think that's why he kept me around. But then
I just it just wasn't enough to bring home its
after that. You know it, Laura, But for everyone in
the car, this is a joke I want you to
use on the weekend.
Speaker 3 (42:15):
What did the cheese say when it looked in the mirror?
Speaker 1 (42:17):
You know that. Georgia Love said this on her Season two.
Halloo me, it's hallo me. That's not a goodle one, Britt,
It's terrible. Did you hear about the explosion at the
cheese factory? There was debris everywhere. No, there was nothing
left but debris. Don't butcher my jokes.
Speaker 3 (42:35):
You know, how do you get a bear out of
a tree with camen.
Speaker 1 (42:40):
We must go, We must be done with this. All
we want to say is Happy Father's Day to all
the dad's out there, and hopefully your jokes are better
than Brits. Not all. Here is where cape, I'm here
to s
This episode was recorded on cameragle Land. Hi guys, and
a welcome back to another episode of Life. I'm cut,
I'm Laura, I'm Brittany, and this is well if you're
just joining us, this is actually to pick up where
we package up the best of our radio show. We
bring it here for you. Look, we do every week.
Speaker 2 (00:19):
I every week seem to talk about something that Laura
doesn't want me to talk about.
Speaker 1 (00:22):
And this week it's ghosts. It's not that I don't
want you to talk about I just don't necessarily believe
in them. Yeah. Last week, oh, she's talking about aliens.
This week goes, I can't win your band from bringing content. Now, well, I'm.
Speaker 2 (00:34):
Pretty sure something happened in my bedroom. I think that
there is something in there that shouldn't be what I go.
Speaker 1 (00:41):
I don't know how to spell that one out for
you there, Laura, I'm pretty sure, I Saura, I go
through some description after me living in the apartment that
britt lives in, because if you're new to the point,
I always say this every time, but like, I feel
like this setup is necessary for dad of an apartment
I moved in. Yeah, so I lived there for a
couple of years prior to britt living there and now
so combine, I think we both lived there for like
(01:01):
almost six years combined. Yeah, I've been there for ages.
Yeah three years. Well yeah, I was there for three
years because I had Mali, and then you were there
for three six hours. Yeah. Wow, good for you. It
is probably time for me to move on. But in
six years, all of a sudden, Brittin now thinks it
is haunted by ghosts.
Speaker 2 (01:18):
Ghost don't just show themselves the second you walk in, Laura.
It's not like, hey, welcome to the apartment.
Speaker 1 (01:22):
I'm a ghost. I live here.
Speaker 2 (01:23):
Like that's not how ghosts were. And I know that
because they told me.
Speaker 1 (01:27):
Okay, we did get into ghost stories. The one in
that apartment I might not be behind, but you have
other ghost stories. I'm here for Well, if.
Speaker 3 (01:34):
It's not a ghost, it was a mini UFO in
my room, so you pick.
Speaker 1 (01:38):
What it is. Also, I don't know. We did this
break on radio and then the more I thought about it,
I was like, oh, maybe there is a problem with
my child. So Lola said, you know how has kids
sometimes say like scary, weird shit like that they shouldn't say,
or they'll be like I want to kill you. And
you're like, you don't mean that. You don't know what
that means. It's just saying that. I how they do. Like,
for example, Lola came home from daycare recently and she
(02:01):
was like, Mommy, get my drink bottle. And I was like, no,
you can say please, and she goes, please get my
drink bottle. I'm gonna kick you in the balls, and
I was like, you're four and I don't have balls,
And where did you even hear that? I think that's okay,
But I feel like saying you need to kill someone's
next level, right. Well yeah, look, to be fair for context,
she didn't say she was gonna kill someone. She just
said she wanted to die them. So I think it's
(02:22):
the same. But also it kind of sounds cute when
it's coming out of a four year old's mouth. I
think we know where she was going with it. I
want to die used. I don't think she wants to
tie die shirt or dye hair.
Speaker 2 (02:30):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (02:30):
So look, Lola said something very questionable about one of
her care cares. I don't want to like say anything
that could potentially be a lawsuit, yeah, or that I
don't I also don't want to have a target on
her back. I don't want this care. I don't want
this care to know that Lawla doesn't like them if
you put a target on her back, Like all Laura's
friends are gonna hear and they're all gonna target her. Nah,
(02:52):
she's fun, She's that kid, will stand up for herself.
She's got no worries. Anyway, let's get into it, guys,
lawsy laws laws Anita.
Speaker 2 (03:02):
Did you see what went down at the US Open
over the weekend, So obviously that is the Tennis Grand Slam.
Speaker 1 (03:08):
If you're not somehow across what the US Open.
Speaker 2 (03:10):
Is, there is this footage of this CEO grown man
that has gone absolutely bonkers online. So after one of
the matches, I think it was maybe in the second round,
there is a Polish tennis player that was playing.
Speaker 3 (03:22):
His name is Camille.
Speaker 2 (03:23):
Meijak, and he was like, they go over after they
finish their match and they sign autographs and whatever else.
So there's this kid that's about ten or eleven that's
hanging over the site to try and get this famous
tennis players autograph, and somebody from the other side.
Speaker 1 (03:37):
Of the court is filming.
Speaker 2 (03:39):
Because this is what you do, right, you film famous
people that you like. And so this lovely tennis player
signing autographs takes his own cap off that he just
played in, so it's obviously sweaty. It's what people want, right,
So he gives it to this super fan ten year
old boy, and the boy's ecstatic. But the boy only
has it for like three point three seconds it's in
(04:01):
his hands, and then this grown man next to him
that must be like, I don't know, forty five fifty
years old, snatches it from this ten year old boy
quickly gives it to his wife, who stuffs it in
her bag and they just try and do a runner,
and this ten year old boys like crying out after them.
Speaker 1 (04:16):
Like, hey, what are you doing? That's my my hat back.
Speaker 2 (04:18):
The tennis player didn't see it happen, so he just
like walks off.
Speaker 1 (04:22):
What did everyone else in their stand to? Because I
have seen this, well, I think it happened to quickly.
Speaker 2 (04:27):
If you're there in person, I don't think you would
see it and it would have the same effect.
Speaker 1 (04:30):
But the video has gone bonkers. Anyway.
Speaker 2 (04:32):
This guy, I was about to say, this poor guy,
no stuff him, but he has received this onslaught of
hate that. Apparently he has had to deactivate his Instagram.
Speaker 1 (04:41):
Yeah, because the internet does what the Internet does. They
tracked out in these people and we have a cold
Play saga all over again.
Speaker 2 (04:47):
Well, there are people calling him a sack of garbage,
a common thief, a primitive scammer, a shameful jerk. Now
this is where it gets interesting. I think grain of
salt here. But apparently this ceo he was tracked down
is the CEO of a big paving company. His name,
I'm gonna butcher this.
Speaker 1 (05:06):
It's Polish. It is Pyota Sherk. So you can all
go and stalk him yourself and send him hate mail.
Speaker 2 (05:12):
Yeah, this is what his apparent statement was. Now it
hasn't been verified, but he said allegedly it's all about
the famous hat.
Speaker 1 (05:22):
Yes I took it, Yes I did it quickly.
Speaker 2 (05:24):
But as I've always said, life is first come, first serve.
I understand that some people might not like it, but please,
let's not make a global scandal out of the hat.
Speaker 1 (05:34):
It's just a hat and if you were faster, you
would have it. Okay, can't be real. So there's so
many passes. Firstly, also, so horrible to steal something like
that from a kid who's next to you, Like the
fact that this was called on camera the guy's an asshole.
There's so much about this that is reminiscent to the
whole Coldplay saga of a month ago. In a moment
(05:55):
now where the Internet gets angry, we find out that
it's a wealthy millionaire CEO, which we like to hate
on any and so then you kind of take them down.
But the thing is, I don't know if you remember,
during that cold Play saga, there was all these statements
that were generated and were circulating from the apparent ex
wife of the CEO because she left him and she
was all empowered, and her daughter as well. Yeah, and
(06:16):
it turned out that all of these were totally fake,
like just had been put out on social media as
the official statement from the wife or the girlfriend whoever.
And I think it's the same thing for this, Like
no CEO with even one ounce of like, I don't know,
some sort of EQ is gonna say it's just a hat.
If you were faster, you would have it. He's a
(06:37):
ten year old kid. The kid is as fast as
a kid.
Speaker 2 (06:39):
Yeah, But also we say that like no CEO would
have an EQ like that well he does. We saw
him take the hat from a child, but I snatched
it from the child, and like when you watch the
footage back and okay, I think we've established a statements.
Probably AI not real. But going back to the incident,
what grown man uels from a child in like to
(07:02):
the level of like in front of a national crowd.
You know what's on television, you know what's filmed.
Speaker 1 (07:06):
You're like, that is wild. Yeah, I think though for me,
that's just someone who thought they could get away with it.
Like people do shitty things every day because they think
they can get away with it. Now, I mean, fortunately
and unfortunately if you're that crappy person you like, so
many things are filmed. Everyone has an iPhone and everything
gets cap shitted if you're going to do something that's
like so petty. And but also they kind of like
(07:28):
morally not okay, like the world will come for you,
The internet will come for you. They are visual ands
out there and you just can't get away with stuff anymore.
Speaker 2 (07:35):
Well, the little kid had the last laugh, because the
internet does do what the Internet did. The tennis player
heard about it through the news. He put his own
Instagram out saying somebody helped me. I did not see
this happen. Someone helped me track down this child, and
they found the child, and he sent him a bunch
of more stuff, and he has the tennis player has.
Speaker 1 (07:52):
Made up for it. So like, at the end of
the day, it ends well. But also like just don't
be a jerk. That's some moral of the story.
Speaker 2 (07:58):
Now, last week on the show, and Laura, You're gonna
hate that I'm about to talk about.
Speaker 1 (08:02):
This, But last week on the show, I already know
what it is.
Speaker 2 (08:04):
We're talking about aliens and like UFOs and if people had.
Speaker 1 (08:08):
Ever had those really weird and wonderful sightings.
Speaker 2 (08:11):
Because I think it's a little bit ignorant and naive
of us to think that we are the only people
in this universe.
Speaker 3 (08:18):
I think if we can exist, someone else can exist.
Speaker 1 (08:20):
Yes, I know, but some of the content that you're
bringing is questionable in terms of like, like aliens exist.
You're sitting in the corner of the studio with a
tinfoil hat on.
Speaker 2 (08:30):
I haven't said they exist, but I am open to
it and I love to hear other people's stories. This morning,
something happened to me in my own house, and I
just cannot explain it now. I want to get your
take on it, just to set the scene. I have
seen ghosts.
Speaker 1 (08:44):
Before, so.
Speaker 3 (08:47):
Like that is something that I have spoken about over
the years.
Speaker 2 (08:50):
I think if I counted them, I've probably seen seven
in my entire life.
Speaker 1 (08:53):
And I am in my early to mid to late thirties.
So this morning, I was in my room. I hadn't
put my blinds.
Speaker 2 (09:02):
Up yet, like I wake up early to get ready
for a big day work, and I hadn't. My dog
was in my room, Delilah, she was sleeping in my bed.
I had put my bedside lamp on. Now this is
important because the lighting was quite dark and dull still,
because the only thing lighting in the room was a
lamp and a little tiny bit of light coming through
the on suite. So I went into the shower in
my on suite, and I keep the light on in
(09:23):
the on suite, and I keep the door open so
I can see out from my shower, I can see
into my room. I was showering as normal, and then
I see it was like a mini lightning strike in
my room, like this huge flash, really bright flash of light.
Speaker 1 (09:39):
I'm talking three meters away from me. It's not like
I don't.
Speaker 2 (09:42):
Live in a mansion in the west wing where I'm like,
is that something you know?
Speaker 1 (09:45):
It's like, this is the don't you just think it
could have been like someone opening a window and the
light reflecting alone, as in like like apartment across reflecting
light into yours. The blinds were down, That's what I'm saying.
There was nothing else in the room. There's no light
coming into the room. Delilah was lighting a joint, so
no joint doesn't have an electric shop.
Speaker 2 (10:04):
But anyway, so this lightning bolt comes down and I
was like, what was that? And then Delilah growed my
dog and I was like, she has also just witnessed something.
Something happened in my room this morning, and I can't
explain it now. I don't know if I've put these
feelers out to the world because we were talking.
Speaker 1 (10:19):
About like aliens and ghosts they're coming for you. What
if they heard what if they were like, oh, she
might be down for this. I'm going to go into
a room this morning. You are banned from bringing content.
I don't believe me. I believe you that maybe the
light had a weird short circuit. I don't know, like
the lamp did. Who knows, Britt, I don't know. Some
(10:40):
things can't but some things can't be explained. I understand.
Speaker 2 (10:44):
I was a non believer until I could no longer
pretend it wasn't happening. Like I didn't believe in ghosts
until I saw it.
Speaker 1 (10:51):
You have a very good story like you. I mean
this one I'm on the fence about. But you do
have one lightning bolt. The lightning bolt story, I'm not
convinced her. I haven't quite joined the Illuminati with you.
But the other one you have about seeing a girl
walk across the road, Yeah, it's pretty.
Speaker 2 (11:06):
I mean, now you have to tell it obviously. Yeah,
I mean it takes a bit of a darker turn.
This one's not as happy. But like one of my
sister's really good friends passed away when she was only
like nineteen or twenty years old, and so I was
twenty three. She passed away unexpectedly, and so anyway, the
flash forward a huge amount of time. I am just
driving to work on a normal day, and I have
(11:29):
to stop on this really busy street for this girl
to cross the road.
Speaker 1 (11:34):
And I look across the road at who I'm stopping for,
and it was this point.
Speaker 2 (11:38):
It was like a four way kind of mini highway,
like I never had to stop there for anyone. And
I looked across the road as this girl was walking,
and it was like time stood still.
Speaker 1 (11:47):
And it was like slow motion.
Speaker 2 (11:48):
And this girl had this really happy, bubbly personality, and
she was like she used to walk with a really
specific walk where she'd like bounce on her toes and
she was walking across slow motion, and it wasn't a ghost.
I could see her and I watched her slow motion.
When she got in front of my car, she looked
at me and she smiled this huge smile, and then
(12:10):
she looked away and kept walking. And it was my
sister's friend. Let's call her Sarah. That's not her real name, but.
Speaker 1 (12:15):
I was like, that is Sarah. I was shaking.
Speaker 2 (12:18):
I had to pull over, and so I pulled over
and I messaged my sister and I said, this is
so weird. I need to tell you something. I've just
had to stop and cross the road and I said,
I've just seen Sarah. I said, she walked across the road,
she looked at me and she smiled, and I said,
I feel like I need to tell you that she
was happy, and my sister called me crying and she said,
(12:40):
do you know today's her one year anniversary? And we
the friends were at her gravesite and I had no
idea none. You just can't make that stuff up. And like,
when something like that happens, what.
Speaker 1 (12:51):
Do you do? I mean, I've been very skeptic of
a lot of stories, but when you told me that one,
that is one that I yeah, I mean, like, what
do you say? How do you even? Yeah? Yes? Anyway,
so back to the flash of life. No, that one.
I can't get around that one.
Speaker 2 (13:02):
Well, if anyone knows what that could be, I'm open
to calls.
Speaker 1 (13:05):
Brittany lives in an old apartment building and had electoral
short circuit this morning and it pissed off de laalah.
Speaker 2 (13:11):
Have we got to the bottom of everyone like, oh,
you just wait, I'm going to find someone.
Speaker 1 (13:16):
You're such a skeptic. My goal is to turn you.
The last time we had Ghostbusters on this show, they
told me I was having a boy. It's not a goat.
Speaker 4 (13:24):
Now.
Speaker 1 (13:24):
Have you heard about the relationship test the bird test?
Speaker 2 (13:28):
Briefly, yes, but I've heard of where it actually stemmed from.
Speaker 1 (13:32):
Wow, you know more than me. I'm the one who
brought the break.
Speaker 2 (13:34):
No gotman, I've heard the gotman that he came up
with a theory, but TikTok's taken it and rolled with it.
Speaker 1 (13:38):
Okay, yes, that is exactly it. So if you haven't
heard of what the bird test is, it's a way
in which you can I mean, like, there's no science
behind it. Please don't leave your partner if they fail
the bird test, but you can test them on how
invested they are in the small moments of your day.
So basically the idea is like you might be in
the car driving with your partner, or you might be
I don't know about the park or something, and you're like, hey,
(14:01):
look a bird, and obviously, you know you want to
make a little bit more specific. Maybe you say you
saw I don't know, a pigeon. Whatever. It is, still
no but like you know, that's usually you're not just
gonna be like, hey, look, honey, a bird. But the
specificness of it is something that they will either lean
into it as a bid for connection or they will
be like a bird, like who cares. And it's this
(14:23):
idea of like leaning into the small moments of your
partner's day or leaning away from the small moments if
your partner's day is what looks like for a partner
who's really committed.
Speaker 2 (14:32):
Yeah, and so this comes from the psychologist doctor John
Gotman that he's the one inspired the theory. But yes,
it's the idea of like a successful relationship, you should
be able to tap in and tap out to those
micro moments that your partner might bring to you.
Speaker 1 (14:45):
And I mean it doesn't do about a bird.
Speaker 2 (14:46):
It could be about anything, the tiniest part when they
want to tell you about their day, do you look
up from your phone and engage and ask a question
or do you say that's nice, sweety and move on.
Speaker 1 (14:54):
So of course I saw this on TikTok and I
was like, well, I should probably test this out of
my husband. I should see if he's committed, because now
that we're having another baby in three weeks, I was like,
what better time to really make sure that the relationship
has got legs. So he did the bird test I did.
I did. I like birds. Just want to preface this,
I quite enjoy a bird. I'll point burn I'll point
a bird out to my husband every so often. He's
also a good sport Matt. I think I talk a
(15:17):
lot of grubbish to him, and he really entertains most
of it. So how did it go? It actually went
pretty good. I think your past I have a listened
to this. Hello, Hi, honey, what are you doing work?
I had to call someone and tell them I was
just at a cafe and the most beautiful glar just
(15:37):
came and sat down right next to me. A gala,
a gala in the city. Yeah, it's crazy. It was
so cute. What did you do? Nothing? It flew away,
but I just it was I mean, it was so close.
Did just eat it? But I did feed a bush turkey?
(15:58):
You said, a bush turkey? Oh great? I love you,
Bless his soul. He still doesn't know what happened, though,
But do.
Speaker 2 (16:16):
You know what, he passed the test because he has
no idea what went on?
Speaker 1 (16:20):
You just cold call you when you work day to
tell me you saw a bird and he was engaged.
You don't see glars in the city very often, do Truly,
you're feeding pictures Usually you're crazy picture. Do you know
what I'm more concerned about by doing this is the
fact that he clearly just thinks I'm insane. Normally and
didn't question it at all. He was like, Yep, that's
something my wife would do. Well.
Speaker 2 (16:39):
Apparently, thirty three percent of people that did this test
like their partners didn't pass the test.
Speaker 1 (16:44):
That's pretty high start. Thirty three percent of people are
checked out. I thought only thirty three percent made it.
Speaker 3 (16:49):
Rest Possibly I possibly read that backwards.
Speaker 1 (16:51):
I think she did.
Speaker 2 (16:52):
No, eighty six percent turned towards each other for a
bit fit connection, and only thirty three percent made I
didn't get a producer grade.
Speaker 5 (17:00):
So of people that lasted happily for twenty years, eighty
six percent of them all the time are like turning
in to be like, oh honey, love that bird.
Speaker 1 (17:08):
And then of the people that.
Speaker 5 (17:09):
Didn't, only thirty three percent of them made it.
Speaker 1 (17:13):
Wow, Grace, I will say that the stats you wrote
here were not easy to read, but I'd done producted, Grace.
I'm glad we got to the bottom of the bird.
All Right's irrelevant, Matt past Everyone go home and test
your husbands and your wives. Let's see, let's really mess
up some relationships here, Britt. I need to get your
thoughts and opinions on this, because I'm basically a doctor.
Is that one?
Speaker 4 (17:32):
No?
Speaker 1 (17:33):
Absolutely not. I don't not think that you can claim that.
But you did work in hospital for a long time.
People might not know this about you. H thirteen years yeah,
well radiographer.
Speaker 2 (17:41):
Yeah, diagnostic radiographer fifteen years left the really good work
of being a radiographer to come here and talk crap
on the radio.
Speaker 1 (17:49):
What a noble career change. Look. The reason why I
wanted to speak about this is there's a woman I follow.
Her name is Jen Hamilton, and she's a nurse. She's
from the US, and she posted something that I I
deal with all the time, but I have never seen
someone do this before, and I am shook us to
my core that this is a way in which some
people solve the issue of having inflame taste buds. Okay here,
(18:12):
I know, all right, Okay, come on the journey with me,
wild Ryn. So you know how sometimes you'll wake up
in the morning or like over the day, and you'll
just have one taste bud that gets inflamed, like so
like on the tip of your tongue. You have like one, yes,
you do. It's an ulca. It's not an ulca. It's
not like it's not like a concave thing it's just
like an inflame little dot, a white dot. I have
(18:32):
one literally right now.
Speaker 3 (18:33):
Yeah, but isn't that just a tongue auldsong.
Speaker 1 (18:35):
No, it's not a tongue alds. It's an inflamed taste bud.
If you get them on the reg you will know
they are so deeply annoying. Like once you have one,
it's like all you can kind of feel. You've gotta
talk in a certain way to kind of move your
teeth around your tongue, and I'm pretty sure it's awful. No,
it's not an ulcer. Just enjoin me on this story. Okay,
even Nurse Gen says it's an inflame taste bud. Yeah,
(18:55):
but tell us what else Nurse Gen did. So the
comment section of this is why. But let me just
kind of set up what she did. So Jen gets
a pair of tweezers and she grabs the taste bud, which,
if you've ever had an inflame taste bud, I'm talking
about little tiny ones. She grabs it and she pulls
it straight off like like she's pulling out a blackhead, right,
and then it bleeds for a second, and within twenty
(19:18):
seconds she's like it's gone. No, pain, completely gone.
Speaker 2 (19:22):
I do not believe that is no pain. Think of
how much it hurts if you accidentally bite your tongue.
Speaker 1 (19:26):
And she said this, She said, warning, if there's one
thing about me that I'm not going to live with,
it's a swollen taste bud. You were getting yoinked and
you were gone. That's disgusting. The problem is is like
I watched this and I was like absolutely horrified. I was,
oh my god, that to me is so painful because
I do get them, and I was like, the thought
of ripping them out sounds like irrational. It was the
comment section that blew my mind the amount of people
(19:48):
who were like, am I the only one who didn't
know about swollen taste buds? For one's why I didn't? Yeah?
And then other people are like, oh my god, I
thought I was a psycho for doing this. But I
just rip them out and then they go away within seconds.
Someone else wrote that they clipped them off with a
pair of nail clippers. What is wrong with the world.
It's a taste bud. Let it live. Glad I'm not
the only one doing this. It's legitimate. This person wrote,
(20:12):
I've done this my whole life, it hurts so bad
for literally a minute, but way better than letting it
hurt and be swollen for four to five days. Are
we pulling off our own taste buds when they get swollen?
Speaker 2 (20:21):
Well apparently, but I mean ten minutes ago, I've never
even heard of it.
Speaker 1 (20:24):
I'm gonna try it next time because I get them
really often. I'm gonna I'm going to rip one off
a report pack.
Speaker 2 (20:29):
I actually don't think we should be advising ew I
just googled it.
Speaker 3 (20:33):
You get that those pussy little things on your tongue, not.
Speaker 1 (20:36):
Like that bad? Yeah, I've got one here. It's when
you have a lower moon system. I think immune system
when you run down my moon systems ammunity. I blame
pregnancy for everything at the moment. Guys, No, this.
Speaker 2 (20:47):
Person's attached to a piece of string and they're pulling
it off exactly.
Speaker 1 (20:51):
People pluck them off. People are cooked. Man, Just let
it leave, no, because it does hurt. And I've even
been speaking weird today because it hurts on the side
of my mouth. Anyone want to complic it? Okay, where's
the line? Like, if you can get your partner to
like pick your pimples in your black heads. Can you
get your partner to mine?
Speaker 2 (21:07):
No, that is the line, and anyone is doing that
to yourself or each other is disgusting.
Speaker 1 (21:12):
This is please, this is not medical advice. Laura is
not telling you to do this. If you do want
to go and look it up, though, go Jen Hamilton's
Instagram because she's a nurse. I trust her well, I
want I'll follow a nurse on Laura.
Speaker 2 (21:25):
I was shook by the general public's response on the
weekend to my niece Maya's first birthday.
Speaker 1 (21:32):
Why does the general public even weigh in on your
niece's birthday? Great question.
Speaker 2 (21:36):
So, my niece Maya turned one. I flew up north
to spend it with my sister and her, and they're
like a really small mini party, and I put some
photos on Instagram, you know, like happy first birthday to
my niece.
Speaker 1 (21:48):
Whatever.
Speaker 2 (21:49):
Do have a couple of kids. I mean, my niece
doesn't really do much. She can't even walk yet, so it's.
Speaker 1 (21:53):
But also, I said this the other week, I feel
like the first birthday party is a celebration for the parents,
for major a whole year of being a parent. That's
absolutely what it was.
Speaker 2 (22:04):
But Maya's quite advanced so her friends are a little
older than her.
Speaker 1 (22:07):
So she's what like thirty five, yeah, pretty much. No,
she was the youngest there.
Speaker 2 (22:12):
The other kids were like, I think the next youngest
kid was three. Then they were like five, six and seven,
because they were obviously like our friends' kids. Yeah, anyway,
so I put a foight up of her eating her
first birthday cake. Now it was like just a rainbow
cake that you can get from Woolies.
Speaker 1 (22:28):
I saw it. It's the iconic. Every parent will know it.
It's the rainbow like side cake. It's got white icing
on the outside. You cut it open, it's a rain
It's a classic. It's a kid classic.
Speaker 2 (22:37):
So she cut it open, flipped it around, made it
into a butterfly, added.
Speaker 1 (22:40):
Some bits whatever, jazzed it up a bit.
Speaker 2 (22:42):
But it's like just has hundreds and thousands all over
it and inside rainbow and it's icing.
Speaker 1 (22:47):
It's just a delicious cake. It's full of sugar. Well
this is this is where this is going.
Speaker 2 (22:52):
And so I put the photo up, thought nothing about it,
and then I started to get some messages just sporadic
at the start, thought nothing of it and like ignored them,
like in my dms. Then they started to come in
way more frequently, people pretty gobsmacked that a one year
old would have a birthday cake with sugar. Like. The
messages started to be like, okay, sorry, is that kid friendly?
Speaker 3 (23:16):
And I was like, well, it's not toxic. She can
Can she consume me?
Speaker 1 (23:19):
Yes?
Speaker 2 (23:20):
Anyway, this came in more and more and more and more,
and then there were people saying you should have given
her a watermelon cake, people sending me pictures of it.
I am sorry, but there were people sending me literally
a watermelon that they cut and scoop it out and
then they put a candle in the child.
Speaker 1 (23:36):
People make a watermelon cake. Sorry, your poor child. Somebody
take that child away. Kids one, it doesn't know any different.
This is what I want to add on top of this.
Speaker 2 (23:45):
My sister Sherry is a nutritionist. She this is her life.
She knows what he's okay, she knows what he's good.
The child has never like Maya has never had sugar before.
Speaker 1 (23:55):
She doesn't eat sugar. Go off, queen, give get her
in one big hare.
Speaker 5 (23:58):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (23:58):
And so Sharon was like, again, oh my god, you've
never seen I tell you what, she had one taste
and you've never seen a kid want to eat so quickly.
I'm assuming that's the addictive nature of the sugar kicking
in and she never eats it. She's not gonna eat
it for the next year. But it's guys, if we
are living in a world where we cannot have a
birthday cake and you've got to have a piece of
do you know what watermelon is?
Speaker 1 (24:17):
It's water?
Speaker 3 (24:18):
Are you going to give your child water for their
first birthday?
Speaker 1 (24:21):
This is a real rant that I wasn't expecting from
you to because.
Speaker 2 (24:23):
I just A'm like, guys, let like, there is so
much going on in the world, let a kid have
a and like all the other kids want a birthday cake.
Speaker 1 (24:29):
They don't want watermelon, like it's a birthday. But also
you're like on Auntie Duty's and you're getting yelled at
even your legs not in my Cake't I get very defense?
Like the difference between this is people obviously just expect
more from you, brit because I've bought that, Because I've
bought that exact same cake for both my kid's birthdays,
for almost every single birthday on repeat. Well that's see
(24:51):
if they were one and I've never received a message
everyone's like, yeah, that's about right, Laura. I even covered
it and start sat.
Speaker 3 (24:57):
Laura's got no time to do anything. She would have
got that.
Speaker 1 (24:59):
I literally covered it. Yeah. I think it was Lola's
first birthday. I covered it in smarties and also things
that could be considered a choking hazard, and not one
single person message. Laura's like, what is that? You know
where you put Yeah? I just yeah, I just you know,
(25:19):
I like decorated with bits of lego, and everyone was like, yeah,
that's right up Laura's Sally, we joke. I put sparkles
in it. It's got like fireworks. It's gonna explode. I'm
a great mom, thank you, But I also you brought
this up. Don't attack me. That's right, that's right. The
birthday parties are for birthday partying. Let me live, Let
them live. If they want a cake, they can need
(25:39):
a cake. I feel like someone hurt you on the weekend.
Now we're talking about hidden secrets. So if you have
we're talking about secret talent secrets. Hidden secrets. Secrets are
usually hidden. Because I've lost the plot today, I actually have.
We're talking about hidden talents, and I know produced Grace,
you're a bit confused about this because I brought this
(26:00):
even though I forgot about what we're just talking about.
But I want to know what is your hidden talent?
Give us a call. The reason why I wanted to
talk about this is because the other night I was
just casually flicking through my stories on Instagram looking at
what my friends were up to, and Producer Grace you
popped up. There. You were, you popped up in all
your glory. And when I say all your glory, you
(26:22):
were in Stripper Hills on a stripper pole and you
were wearing not much scantily clad and you were doing
a full blown middle splits upside down. And I just
I've known you for so long now, like we spend
so much time together, and it took the wind out
of me. It anes did.
Speaker 2 (26:39):
I was not it.
Speaker 1 (26:41):
Do you know why, Laura? I got shocked. I was
so shocked. It's like, how have you kept this a
secret for so long? It's because you're not on her
close friends group. Okay, that's a lie. Laura is in
my close friends you haven't seen her talent.
Speaker 5 (26:53):
And I usually put my pole dancing stuff on there
because I have like relatives and bosses and stuff that followed.
Speaker 1 (26:58):
Me so you through that the window. This didn't you
were like, watch me do the middle splits and a
g string put that straight up on the main feed. No,
that was on close Friends. It wasn't. Did your main
feed that main feed at it? Your watches this?
Speaker 5 (27:11):
Yeah, And there are a few people in the office
that I got to see a real live reaction to
watching me do that, And I went, you.
Speaker 1 (27:15):
Know what, I'm going to pop this on close friends.
Speaker 2 (27:19):
Okay, you are very talented, so like, just to really
get the picture, she was upside down on the pole,
holding on by only her hands.
Speaker 3 (27:25):
Your legs were in the splits in the g banger.
Speaker 2 (27:28):
And then you did like a swifty flipp thing twirl
down the pole and you still made it look graceful.
Speaker 1 (27:33):
It was impressive. The reason why I was confused by
this is because you mentioned not so long ago, You're like, oh, yeah,
you know, I'm doing cold dancing. I've only just started,
and so like you know, when you see someone who's
just started pole dancing, they're particularly bad at it. So like,
I wasn't expecting a full middle split which I can
barely touch my toe. Actually I can't touch my toes
at this moment. Let's be real. But I was, I
mean pleasantly surprised. But also I don't understand why you've
(27:55):
been keeping this secret.
Speaker 5 (27:57):
It's a workplace. I wasn't just going to drop into
the split. It's in a workplace.
Speaker 1 (28:00):
Why not that sounds you know what we need?
Speaker 5 (28:03):
I mean, I can, but there's a lot of equipment around.
I don't want to damage anything.
Speaker 1 (28:06):
You are, Jeans, Could you do this?
Speaker 4 (28:08):
Gene?
Speaker 1 (28:08):
I reckon? I could? Could you do it quickly? Okay?
All right, all right, I'll hold the thought down. Oh
she's going down. Oh oh my god, holy holy, oh
my god. You really can do it? Oh, Jean, I've
got can you push yourself up? Putty hips pop out?
Speaker 2 (28:22):
Oh wow, we're actually absolutely putting that onto our socials, grit.
Speaker 1 (28:27):
Do you have a head and talent that you've kept
from the world? Do you know what I have?
Speaker 2 (28:31):
It's one that I I don't know if I wanted
to let people know that I had this talent because
I don't want to brag. But I can for the
sake of the show, I can tell you I can
do a seagull.
Speaker 1 (28:40):
Sound I like that you keep it that a secret,
but actually you have done that on the show before.
Have I Yeah, you busted it out once? Can you
give it to us again again? What haven't done well?
Warm up? I'll push the Micpriene away everyone, everyone across
the nation changes channel on the radio. That sounds pretty?
(29:01):
Was that a lead or not? Actually? Wasn't that good?
Wasn't it? Have I lost my talent? It wasn't convincing.
Don't be mean. Sorry, that's my one talent. Was it
not good? You've got other talents? Baby? No, I don't.
That's always got left. Actually, look the phone's been going up.
We've got Courtney on the line. Courtney, what's your hidden talent?
Speaker 4 (29:23):
So I can still, after years squirt breast milk out
of my good boob at least four to five meters
away from where I'm standing? How every time? Without fail?
Speaker 1 (29:33):
How LONGO did you stop breastfeeding?
Speaker 4 (29:36):
So I've not long stop with my youngest, but there's
six years between my two and I could still do
it five years after I had my elders.
Speaker 1 (29:42):
Oh my god, that's amazing. What do you mean you're
still producing milk without breastfeeding. I'm so confused. Some people do.
Speaker 4 (29:49):
My good bob can still go for miles and she
never stopped.
Speaker 1 (29:53):
Do you know what's so funny about this is like
every mom who's ever breastfed is like, oh yeah, yeah,
I know the good boob story. There's always one food that,
like your kid prefers to feed on, and then that
boob gets really good at making milk, and the other
one's just like this sad sack that hangs by the
side Britain. Literally, no, I was thinking.
Speaker 4 (30:12):
Good for when your husband won't stop snoring at not
like it is amazing, like the room and it's just
like one quid little squirt he doesn't know, but it's
so harmless and it just makes you feel so much
better about not sleeping at night.
Speaker 1 (30:25):
Oh my god, it's just hilarious. I have this moment
with my husband. This is years and years ago when
my first born was young and I was in the
bath and he came in. He was like fully clothed,
but he was just sitting on the loo having a
chat to me. And I said, I reckon, I could
squirt you with breast milk from here, and he said,
go for it. And not only did I squirt him,
but I squired it all up the wall on the
other side. You get some real reach with that stuff. Yeah,
(30:46):
I've seen it happen, not from you.
Speaker 4 (30:47):
But it can go everywhere, like almost an explosion sometimes,
especially when you're early breastfeeding days.
Speaker 1 (30:53):
Oh my god, breastfeeding.
Speaker 2 (30:54):
But I also have a boob I prefer but that's
for another day. All Right, we're going to take a
little bit of a switch here. We often talk about parenting,
but we're going to talk about grand parenting for a second.
Who gets to choose the name that a grandparent uses.
Speaker 1 (31:12):
I think it's open to the grandparents because otherwise you
end up with like multiple nanas or multiple nannies, and
like you know, sometimes you'll have the conversation of like,
all right, my mom wants to be Nana. Does your
mom want to be grandma or be nanny? And then
if they can kind of choose, Yeah, so Ellie, who
is my mother in law? She lives with us. It
(31:32):
kind of just worked out that both grandparents became nana,
and so now it's like Nana who lives with us,
Nana who doesn't live with us.
Speaker 2 (31:39):
We used to do that, but it be like you
use their names like Nana jam yes, yeah.
Speaker 1 (31:44):
Okay, So Ellie my mother in law, she wants to
be called Nelly, and my kids refuse to pick up
the word Nellie. They're like, no, you're not Nelly's. They're
not a rapper, You're not Nelly. Okay.
Speaker 2 (31:55):
So this has come off the back of a Reddit
thread online where one woman has I'm out asking, like,
m I the a hole because she's got little kids,
she's she's sorry, she's pregnant, she hasn't even.
Speaker 1 (32:06):
Birthed her child yet.
Speaker 3 (32:07):
And her own mother came out and said, I've decided
what I want to be called.
Speaker 1 (32:11):
I want to be.
Speaker 2 (32:12):
Called big Mama, not nana, not grandma, not grammy, whatever,
big mama.
Speaker 1 (32:19):
No, that's no, Well, the daughter, it's going to be
within reason. This is what the daughter has said.
Speaker 2 (32:24):
I told her nicely, I was uncomfortable with it because
I should be the only person who is even remotely
considered mama or any type of mama.
Speaker 1 (32:33):
She went into this.
Speaker 2 (32:33):
Whole spree about how she's the grandparent and she gets
to be called anything she wants, and that you need
to respect your elders.
Speaker 1 (32:40):
Oh my god, get a grip.
Speaker 2 (32:41):
No, it's coming to this discussion now of like who
bestows the name that the grandparent uses is it bestowed
upon the grandparent by their child, or does the grandparent
get to say, hey, this is what I'm comfortable with.
Speaker 1 (32:54):
Do you know what? Though, it kind of depends on
how present the grandparent is as well. See Mama is
going to be present, he is it? No, because I
think what happened with us is like, we just referred
to Nana as Nana. You know, we refer to my
mum as Nana because that's what we called our grandma.
You know, the kids spend way more time with us
than they do with Nana, so they would just start
(33:14):
saying Nana. I kind of feel like you can curtail
this even and the kids will just be like, why
does Nana keep calling herself big Mama. It's weird come
to big Mama. That doesn't like it a vibe it.
But that's kind of what happened in our house with
Ellie when Ellie was like, call me Nelly, but the
kids were like, no, you're Nana. That's weird. Does she
wear it like a gold grill?
Speaker 2 (33:35):
In our household, we have NJ, So my nana is NJ.
And that was she decided that anytime we'd call her Nana,
she would say NJ, and she would just drill it
into us. So that stands for Nana Jan. Well, she's
just ENJ to us now. But my dad is a
grampy or a popsicle or a kid Papa Smurf, so
he gets three names. I think it's cute to have
(33:58):
something that's like unique to your family, as long as
everyone is okay with it.
Speaker 1 (34:01):
Yeah, but there's a difference in this question. Okay, so
the grandma wants to be called big Mama. The mama
has said it's a no, and instead of just being like, oh, okay,
I'll come up with something else, she's like, gas, let
her own daughter, And she's like, well, I'm older, respect
your olders. No, I mean you do have to respect
your elders to some capacity. Yes, that flies when you're
a child. It's not when you're also an adult. You
(34:23):
don't just respect someone just because they're older than you.
That's not how it works. Said.
Speaker 3 (34:27):
I do think it's I don't know.
Speaker 1 (34:28):
I'm not a mom, so correct me if I'm wrong.
Speaker 2 (34:29):
I think it's a bit precious to say no one
else will have the name mama in their title because
I'm the only mama. I feel like my dad is
Papa Smurf which has papa in it as a dad.
Speaker 1 (34:39):
Call, like as in like, not many people are calling
their dad papa. They're calling their dad dad, you know,
so like I actually I don't necessarily disagree. My kids
call me mama. They don't call me mom, and so
I would find it weird if they were calling another
person mama mama. Yeah, just like I don't think Matt
would really appreciate if the kids were calling my dad dada,
big dadda. Like I don't know. I can understand why
(35:02):
it's need seriously, we're taking this neither neither. Actually I
can understand why it's weirded the mum out. But also
I think step aside Grandma. I know you're the grandma,
but you're not the mom. They're fighting words. Laura. I
say this, but then I'm also like Ellie leaving me.
Speaker 2 (35:18):
I need you. So Ellie can be called anything she
wants as long as she Ellie can wrap, Nellie can
be a rapper.
Speaker 1 (35:24):
I'll call you Nellie every day of the week. Just
never leave. So my youngest Lola, she's four years old
now almost five. I mean, I've described her on the
show before as being like the personality higher of our family,
which I feel like you need to stop describing her,
like I know, I don't think she's so funny, Like
she comes out with these one liners. She says really
inappropriate things, very energetic. She's like a little energizer bunny,
(35:46):
and she has like really good comedic timing, right, But
she also says some things and I'm like, oh, you
really shouldn't say that. You're gonna get yourself in trouble.
And I don't know whether it's just she feels safe
at home so she can push the boundaries, or she's
a psychopath, which one is it? I wish we were joking,
or she says these things maybe at school and I'm like,
that's gonna get you into a lot of trouble. Don't
(36:07):
say that. So she does sport, and she does she
goes to like daycare, and she has quite a few
adults in her life that have like caretaker roles, you know,
like whether it's a sporting activity or a school. And
I'm saying this because I want to make this very generic.
I do not want the person. You don't want the
person to know. I don't want the person who is
involved in this story to know that they are involved
in this story, because that's awkward for everyone. But Lola
(36:28):
comes home the other day from an unprescribed activity that
she did and she goes, Mummy, this real half. She goes,
I hate Sarah and I was like, oh, you hate Sarah.
She's like, I hate her and I was like, okay,
why do you hate her? She goes, she's always telling me, Lola,
don't do this, Lola, don't do that. She's always getting
cross down the knife and wait for it. And I
(36:50):
was like, oh, honey, she's just trying to keep you safe.
And she goes, yeah, well you know what I want
to do. I want to cut her finger off and
eat it. And I was like sorry, and she goes,
I want to dye her and cut her finger off
and eat it. And I was like, sweetheart, you're four,
you sweetart.
Speaker 2 (37:07):
That's murder and cannibalism and illegal in every country.
Speaker 1 (37:10):
I was like, I don't know if I just heard
what I think I heard anyway. Of course, that wasn't
home at the time, so of course the first thing
I did there was no I voice recorded me telling
him because I couldn't get on to him on the phone.
He was at work, and so I voice recorded and
I was telling him the story. I was like, baby,
you'll never believe what your daughter just said. And as
I'm telling him the story, Lola hears me and she goes,
(37:32):
who are you calling? And I was like, I'm calling
your father and she goes, oh, I thought you were
calling Sarah and I was like and I was like, no,
I'm not calling Sarah, and she goes, you should call her.
Tell her I want her to dye her and I'm
gonna cut her finger off and eat it. Oh my god,
it's crazy, right, But then listen to how cute it
sounds when it comes out of a four year old's mouth, and.
Speaker 2 (37:54):
Do what concerns I don't know if you should be
laughing at her?
Speaker 1 (38:04):
That's what I'm concerned about it. I'm like that, I
think there's a mishandling of this situation. It's like, then,
be real fighting words. I don't know. I don't know why,
I don't know where it's come from. I send it
to Matt and Matt was like, do you think we
should be concerned about this? There's not a normal response.
Speaker 2 (38:17):
Didn't you watch Jeffrey Dahmer documentary with her like there
were signs when he was.
Speaker 1 (38:20):
A child, there was ignore them. Now it makes me
concerned because every so often she like because she comes
in by a room at night time to get in
bed with me, and sometimes she's just like there's a dark,
ominous figure over the side of the bed, And I'm like,
what are you actually thinking, bro?
Speaker 2 (38:34):
Why you come for me for thinking there's ghosts and
wanting to talk about that.
Speaker 1 (38:37):
This is so much worse than that.
Speaker 3 (38:39):
There is some psychologist sitting in the car.
Speaker 1 (38:41):
Right now trying to call this line, being like, I
need to talk to Laura and Lola. I'll get them
on next week's show because we got to go. You know,
the school's gotta listen to wherever she went. Whatever this
unknown kids give her is, he's going to kick her out,
for sure. They're like spend Lola. She's just so cute
though that even when she says, really messed up. You
know you else was cute? Ted Bundy, he was not cute.
(39:04):
He was a hot cycle. That's rible. It is Father's
Day this weekend. I haven't organized anything yet.
Speaker 3 (39:12):
Well, I already gave my dad.
Speaker 1 (39:13):
A Father's dy present. Actually, well done, well done organized.
Speaker 2 (39:16):
Yeah, but I want to give all you dads out
there a present.
Speaker 1 (39:20):
Right now.
Speaker 2 (39:21):
I am going to give you the gift of the
ultimate dad jokes.
Speaker 1 (39:25):
Now. I love a dad joke.
Speaker 2 (39:27):
Shockingly, I'm not a dad, but I do love them.
I love a bad joke.
Speaker 3 (39:31):
And I feel like people need to be armed.
Speaker 1 (39:33):
With new jokes going into the weekend. The problem I
have is that, sorry, we keep you up, Laura. Wow, guys,
I'm about to have a baby. Okay, all I do
is yawn and have reflux. No, the problem with jokes
for me is like my brain does not retain them.
I hear them, I laugh, and then I just can
never recall them, whereas you're full of like my dad
(39:54):
is also very good at a dad joke.
Speaker 3 (39:56):
I reckon you'll know some of these laws, so if
you know, I'm try.
Speaker 1 (39:59):
The only one I have is the toilet paper one,
which I've told about ten times. Why did the four
year old? Why did the toilet paper roll down the hill?
Get to the bottom, get to the bottom?
Speaker 2 (40:07):
All right, ready, we're going to start with my favorite topic.
Speaker 3 (40:11):
Why are pirates pirates?
Speaker 1 (40:13):
Because they are? What's a pirate's favorite letter?
Speaker 2 (40:17):
Or you think that, but it would be the sea.
Speaker 1 (40:24):
It's not stupid, it is brilliant. All right.
Speaker 3 (40:26):
Well, where does a pirate go to get his hook?
Speaker 5 (40:29):
Nah?
Speaker 1 (40:30):
No, second hand store? Oh is this just going to
be a break on pirate jokes? Is that what this is?
Speaker 3 (40:38):
I wanted to start with that, but I'm done.
Speaker 2 (40:39):
Okay, So why can't you hear terodactyl going to the
bathroom because they don't go.
Speaker 1 (40:45):
To the bathroom.
Speaker 3 (40:47):
Well, besides the fact they're extinct, the p is silent.
Speaker 1 (40:50):
Oh that's true. Yeah, that's good, that's clever, clever.
Speaker 2 (40:55):
My wife told me to stop acting like a flamingo. No,
I knew it was time to put my foot down.
Speaker 5 (41:04):
Oh.
Speaker 2 (41:05):
Why should you never throw Grandpa's false teeth at a vehicle?
Speaker 1 (41:09):
Because it would be very silly. I don't know any
of these because you might dent show the car. Oh
that's terrible. That wasn't good. Produce a great a terrible one.
You might dent your car. You might I that blame
the one, terrible del Okay.
Speaker 3 (41:29):
Why do bees have sticky hair?
Speaker 1 (41:32):
I don't know, it's just happened. Honey. It's not funny.
Speaker 3 (41:35):
You're almost there because they use honey comb.
Speaker 1 (41:38):
Oh god, okay, my last I feel like we should
get people to call for this. This is probably more
now I've got my last one.
Speaker 2 (41:47):
This is my favorite joke, and I know you know it, Laura.
I used it on The Bachelor many years ago. It's
how I almost wanted to go off but didn't.
Speaker 1 (41:54):
Do You reckon that this was the thing that turned
him off. He was so close to choosing you, and
then you whipped out this terrible joke and he was like, Oh,
I can't do with that for the rest of my life.
Speaker 2 (42:02):
I brought it in really early. That's what actually sold him.
I think that's why he kept me around. But then
I just it just wasn't enough to bring home its
after that. You know it, Laura, But for everyone in
the car, this is a joke I want you to
use on the weekend.
Speaker 3 (42:15):
What did the cheese say when it looked in the mirror?
Speaker 1 (42:17):
You know that. Georgia Love said this on her Season two.
Halloo me, it's hallo me. That's not a goodle one, Britt,
It's terrible. Did you hear about the explosion at the
cheese factory? There was debris everywhere. No, there was nothing
left but debris. Don't butcher my jokes.
Speaker 3 (42:35):
You know, how do you get a bear out of
a tree with camen.
Speaker 1 (42:40):
We must go, We must be done with this. All
we want to say is Happy Father's Day to all
the dad's out there, and hopefully your jokes are better
than Brits. Not all. Here is where cape, I'm here
to s
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