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December 4, 2025 23 mins
Prince Harry goes on Stephen Colbert and receives boo’s for making a bad joke about President Trump. Meanwhile, Dana reacts to Candace Owens accepting a debate against TPUSA over the lies and insults thrown at Charlie Kirk’s family.

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Transcript

Episode Transcript

Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Dana Lashes of surd Truth podcast sponsored by Keltech.

Speaker 2 (00:06):
It's his laugh mission to make bad decisions. It's time
for Florida man.

Speaker 1 (00:14):
It has been way too long since, well it's been
what three days since we've had a story about a
machete came and Florida. Another Florida man arrested after a
road rage. In road rage incident ends an alleged machete
threats it's a little machete. Yeah, it's twee, but it

(00:36):
twas a twee machete. A Florida man's accused of threatening
to kill three people with a small machete during a
road rage. What is a small massie? Like, what's the
regular size? I think a small machete is a good knife.
What is a regular machete? Is a big Actually, let
me see what is the difference big sword and looking thing?

(00:56):
And then a small machete would be like a big knife.

Speaker 2 (00:59):
No, that's just a knife. I don't know.

Speaker 1 (01:04):
Apparently is it less adapted to jungle tasks?

Speaker 2 (01:08):
I don't know.

Speaker 1 (01:09):
So eighteen inches is the common regular average size of machetes.
Then there's a short one that's between like ten and
fourteen inches, Okay, so that's where we're I just I
don't know why I needed to know this anyway. So
this dude got arrested because he was threatening to use
his small machete to kill people on the road. The guy,
James Varner, he of Miami Beach, allegedly followed a victim

(01:31):
to the resident because I guess he was.

Speaker 2 (01:35):
Like riding their bumper.

Speaker 1 (01:37):
Followed the victim of the residence approached the guy yelling,
and then headbutted him, caused the fight between the two.
The family rushed out to break it up, and then
he got out a small machete from his vehicle and
made verbal threats to kill everybody. So he was taken
in the county jail. What is wrong with you people
who get road rage? Unclench your cheeks? Yeah, the ones
you sit on stop it can't deal. Let's see. Oh

(02:02):
this is what I wanted. This is so bad.

Speaker 2 (02:05):
I don't like door dash. I don't know why. Well,
I know a couple of reasons. Why.

Speaker 1 (02:09):
Because sometimes they'll tell me someone's delivering my food a DoorDash,
and then an entirely different person in an entirely different
car shows up. And I've reported it several times and
DoorDash doesn't care. They don't do anything. I think that's
kind of a safety issue. Like what if you're a
single woman and you're ordering food and a big, giant
dude who is not the tiny woman that you thought
was delivering your food shows up.

Speaker 2 (02:28):
You know what I'm saying. This door dash driver was caught.

Speaker 1 (02:31):
He was delivering chicken wings, dropped the box on the porch,
a chicken wing rolled out on the concrete. He put
it back in the box, licked his fingers and then
walked away. Didn't say nothing to the customers. I mean,
people know right like that. There's these doorbell cameras and
that's what this Florida customer, Trina Brown, she saw it

(02:54):
on her door video doorbell footage and the driver was
he was trying to get it out of the insulated bag,
but then the thing all fell to the ground and
then he like put the lid back on, put the
wing and that fell on the concrete porch, back in
the box and then that's it. That's so nasty. And

(03:16):
she said, if it wasn't for the security footage, they
would have never known that their food hit the ground.
You don't do wings like that. That is that's blasphemous.
You don't do no chicken wings like that.

Speaker 2 (03:27):
That's so nasty.

Speaker 1 (03:29):
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(04:11):
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Speaker 2 (04:20):
Now the program is already active.

Speaker 1 (04:21):
There are a couple of dozen churches throughout the faith
based Security network that have already already using it taken
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And you can learn more about the Peacekeepers Program at
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Speaker 3 (04:44):
I generally thought this was the audition for the gingerbread
Prince Sized Christmas in your Boscar? What No?

Speaker 2 (04:50):
I mean, that sounds like a fantastic movie. But you're
you're an actual prince.

Speaker 1 (04:54):
Why would you be Why would you want to be
in one of those movies?

Speaker 3 (04:57):
Well, your Americans are obsessed with Christmas and you're city
obsessive royalty, so why not.

Speaker 1 (05:05):
Hold on?

Speaker 3 (05:05):
Hold on? Look, look, I wouldn't say we're obsessed with royalty. Really,
I heard you, I heard you elected a king. That's
a fair point.

Speaker 2 (05:22):
No, he's he's got a point.

Speaker 3 (05:23):
And often making such a big deal about my great
great great great great great grandfather, George the Third.

Speaker 1 (05:32):
Why is he doing this? This is uh, that's that whining.
That's the whining ginger who is the spare? I thought
he wanted a worldwide privacy tour. He's on with Colbert,
of course, that's probably the only late night host who
would have him.

Speaker 2 (05:46):
And he's on with Colbert.

Speaker 1 (05:47):
He took jabs at Trump, obviously, and people boot him,
they booed him because it just and it seemed very
I mean it seemed contrived because it was welcome back
to the program, Daniel lash with you. He was why
was he even on Cobert? Like, what did he have
to promote? Because don't you normally go on those shows
if you have something to promote?

Speaker 2 (06:07):
What did he have to promote? I don't know, right.

Speaker 1 (06:11):
I didn't watch it because I don't watch late night
television because I'm not ninety thousand years old. Neither are
you guys. You guys don't watch it either.

Speaker 2 (06:18):
But he took a job. He was like, well, I
heard you, guys, hear'ds you guys elected a king or
have a king?

Speaker 1 (06:24):
And then people started booing king works. Yeah, he's not
the sharpest. He's not the sharpest tool in the shed.
He is a tool, though, but he's not the sharpest one.

Speaker 2 (06:37):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (06:37):
And then he said, and you made such a great,
a big deal about my great great great great great
great grandfather. Wow, why is he on there? And also
why doesn't I'm not trying to be ignorant, so please don't.
But he made fun of his brother for balding, So
I feel like it's fair game if you're balding and
you make fun of someone else who's balding. We all
get to make fun of you for being bald. And look,

(07:01):
all I know is that them hair plugs, I think
they do work. I have a friend whose brother, legit
went to Turkey and got hair plugs and now they
work and he's got hair.

Speaker 2 (07:09):
It's weird.

Speaker 1 (07:10):
I don't even know how that happens. Said it was
super painful. I mean, you know, I guess it.

Speaker 2 (07:14):
You know, you do you? But why doesn't he do that?
Doesn't he have money?

Speaker 1 (07:17):
He's got daddy's money, and he's got his mommy's trust
fund that he lives off of. And then doesn't he
also skim from He pretends to be a philanthropist with
everybody else's money. So see what these organizations what they
do is they take big donations and they skim a
percentage off the top for their pay, and then they
donate other people's money and pretend that they're philanthropists.

Speaker 2 (07:36):
And that's what he does. That's the life, ain't it.

Speaker 1 (07:39):
You just skim a little off the top for yourself
and then you give other people's money away, and then
you get awards for being a fake philanthropist. You don't
see these people donating like the Dells do the six
some odd billion dollars. They don't do any of that.
So I don't know why he. I don't know why
he was on with Colbert. This is what he was doing.

(08:00):
And they had the big state dinner at windsor the
Windsor Castle or the Windsor Palace or whatever. They had
the state dinner there, and everyone was out in their
regal finery, you know, trs were out and they had
you know, it's fun watching that stuff. Although I'm so
glad to be an American, I would never tolerate it here,
but I like watching it over there.

Speaker 2 (08:20):
It looks pretty right.

Speaker 1 (08:21):
It looks nice, you know, the ladies dressed like ladies,
the gents dress like gents. Everybody observes nice, you know,
courteous behavior. And then you got this, you know, balding,
whining ginger, who's on Colbert.

Speaker 2 (08:32):
That was his big night.

Speaker 1 (08:34):
And I just think that maybe, maybe, I don't know,
he should stay home and spend more time with his
kids instead of flying private all over the country to
accept purchased awards. And maybe he could enroll his game
show wife. Remember her, she's built like a literal rectangle literally,
maybe he could enroll her in some cooking classes, so

(08:56):
she could, I don't know, maybe learn how to properly
prepare food and prioritize food over merching out jewelry. So
I saw an article, I think it was with the
Post where when she was doing that turkey, she was
wearing six figures worth of jewelry getting salmonella all over
that jewelry. Kine's eyebrows shot up to the stratosphere. I

(09:17):
don't even own six figures worth of like anything like that.
I don't even have like a lot of I mean,
I have a couple of nice jewelry pieces my wedding
ring and then one for my kids, and then you know,
a couple of pairs of earrings, and that's it.

Speaker 2 (09:28):
Everything else, Like.

Speaker 1 (09:30):
Y'all see me the hoops I wear Ladies. I get
them on Amazon. I ain't even kidding. They're made in
Vietnam and I paid twelve ninety nine for them, not
even lying, you know, because I go through them, right,
I wear I worn them for twenty years.

Speaker 2 (09:42):
So that is a fact. That's absolute fact.

Speaker 1 (09:46):
Why are you wearing six figures of jewelry to stuff
a turkey? That's so she just wanted to show off
and be like, look how rich I am. Now that's
all she wanted to do. Nobody does that unless they're
trying to show off, and she could tell she ain't
even hand to turkey before.

Speaker 2 (10:01):
My gosh, so I just.

Speaker 1 (10:03):
Think that we thought of war not to listen to
over entitled brats like this dude. He is not one
of us. Do not come over here, live off daddy's
trust or your mommy's trust fund and your allowance from
daddy which he used to get. Can't even make his
own money now he rents himself out to do these
corporate speeches. I don't know why anybody would listen to
this guy give a corporate speech. The only thing that

(10:23):
he ever won at was he won at genetics because
he was born of his parents, and that's it. He
won the lottery the day he was born to those
two people. That's his only achievement. And it's not even
anything that he did. Why would anybody bring him out
to give a speech and lecture anything, or her for
that matter. My gosh, it's just so cringe tastic. But

(10:44):
we fought a war to not have somebody over here
using their British titles and lecturing all of us about
to out politics. So you're not one of us. You
don't go here, we don't care, be quiet, or get
the hell back over across the pond.

Speaker 2 (11:00):
But I kind of think that they don't want you either.

Speaker 1 (11:04):
Yeah, can you believe getting all that salmonella all over
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Speaker 2 (12:21):
It's time for Dana's Quick five.

Speaker 1 (12:24):
So we were talking about the J six stuff. Now
I can't believe this. Women are dropping thousands of pounds
of dollars. It's a British publication. They're saying there are
thousands of dollars. It's a start of daily mails at
New York Posts two on rib removal surgery. So now
they're saying the fat jab body is coming in. You know,

(12:45):
you can just like watch portion control and exercise. Although
I do understand that there are some people that you know,
they have diabetes and all that. I get that, but
I don't understand like just how we had the body
positivity thing. You don't want to go back to heroin chic,
you know what I'm saying, that's just can you just
be fit for crying out loud?

Speaker 2 (13:03):
But they said that.

Speaker 1 (13:04):
Now, apparently some women who are already thin aren't that
they don't think they're thin enough.

Speaker 2 (13:08):
I feel like they have anorexia.

Speaker 1 (13:10):
If you're taking your ribs out, that's body dysmorphia. It's
kind of transy, I'm saying it is. I think that
there's different forms of body dysmorphia. I think trans is
one of them. Honestly, I think this is too. They said,
it creates the extra cinched. Look what doctor does this?

Speaker 2 (13:32):
What doctor?

Speaker 1 (13:33):
Because these women that are doing this, they're already thin.
They show them your posts as photos.

Speaker 2 (13:39):
Whoa what doctor's doing this. The story also says that
ozempics risky, as though removing the ribs isn't.

Speaker 1 (13:46):
Yeah, exactly, well both of them. I mean, you know,
good night, let's see.

Speaker 2 (13:50):
Oh here we go. It's football. Danna with Sports.

Speaker 1 (13:54):
NFL on CBS shatters the record for the most watched
regular season game in NFL history, with then fifty seven
million viewers.

Speaker 2 (14:04):
Okay, I mean.

Speaker 1 (14:05):
It's over Thanksgiving. There was a captive audience. It was
Cowboys Chiefs. I mean, I'm not surprised to.

Speaker 2 (14:10):
See this at all.

Speaker 1 (14:11):
That's when the sweatpants come out, like your fancy your
nice Thanksgiving top stays on men and women.

Speaker 2 (14:18):
This is universal.

Speaker 1 (14:19):
But then the sweatpants come out right, or some of
y'all are like real smart in advance of your Christmas
meals and Thanksgiving and all that, and y'all wear the
waistband pants like the pool on pants.

Speaker 2 (14:28):
Some of y'all are smart. Let's see here. We also
a new duck this. I'm fascinated by it.

Speaker 1 (14:36):
A new documentary claims that Bush forty one had made
contact there was informed that we made contact with aliens.

Speaker 2 (14:43):
Is this true? I would love for this to be true.

Speaker 1 (14:46):
Probably true. I mean it's gonna go ahead and it
is reported, so I might as well be. They said
that it's a it's a new documentary, and it's astrophysicist
Eric Davis, who says that George H. W. Bush casually
confirmed to him that aliens made contact back in nineteen
sixty four. Apparently a spaceship landed a Holloman Air Force
bace and a non human entity hopped out and was

(15:07):
like sup and then like jutted off back into space.

Speaker 2 (15:10):
I really don't think it would have gone like that.

Speaker 1 (15:13):
And then when Bush asked for more details, he was
told that he did not have a need to know
he Wasn't he ahead of CIA? Then who's above head
of CIA? You know, when Mike Pompeo was head of CIA.
That was the first question we asked him when he
was on air with us, what's up with the Aliens?
And he was not going to answer me, which meant caane.

(15:33):
It was not an unequipped it was not a hard no,
just saying so it's apparently on Amazon Prime, which I'm
immediately going to watch. I'm going to probably watch it tonight.
I'm not gonna lie to you. Probably I'll clear my schedule,
probably won't get any work done because I'm gonna watch it.
And also we got to talk about this later American
Eagle shares jumped. Now Martha Stewart was named the new
face of the brand. They're going to go after her too.

Speaker 2 (15:53):
Stick with us. So this is my first question, and
don't laugh.

Speaker 1 (15:58):
Does the DOW any evidence at all of a French
military plot to assassinate Canisonage? That is an interesting question,
not that I'm aware of, but you know, interesting question
I can try to find out and maybe let you know.

Speaker 2 (16:15):
I think that might be a more of a law
enforcement matter.

Speaker 1 (16:18):
Though and it's k fabe completely welcome back to the program,
Dane lash with you or at the bottom of the
second hour, what it a crazy The Pentagon press secretary
is like, yeah, no, that didn't happen. I didn't want
to like get into all of that. I hate talking
about k fabe actors. And just a reminder, you know,
Owens literally was a hardcore progressive up until twenty sixteen.

(16:41):
She was a protege of Al Sharpton, and she docked
conservatives online. You don't just immediately flip like that with
no explanation as to why. It's very weird. I just
think that she just chases the money. One of my friends,
Kiera Davis, was like warning people about this like forever, and.

Speaker 2 (17:00):
She got some pretty harsh.

Speaker 1 (17:00):
Criticism in the very beginning. I think you remember some
of that came. She got a lot of harsh criticism
for that, but she was right. I mean, other people,
you know, Sonny Johnson, you know a lot of other
conservatives who've been around for a long time or like yeah, no, no, no,
this is a grift.

Speaker 2 (17:13):
But the reason I bring.

Speaker 1 (17:14):
It up is because that's the stupidest story ever that
I've ever heard.

Speaker 2 (17:17):
It's all total k fabe. It's all it is. Her
whole thing is k fabe.

Speaker 1 (17:21):
All right, what's k fabe?

Speaker 2 (17:23):
That's the that's.

Speaker 1 (17:25):
It's like the fake I don't want to hear from
wrestling people. It's the fake wrestling drama. Oh okay, you
know what k fabe is because you like wrestling.

Speaker 2 (17:36):
Right well, I know that. It's like, so it's it's.

Speaker 1 (17:40):
In like WWE, and it's like the it's the acting
and presenting the matches is real. Okay, Like it's all
like you buy into the reality of all of that,
and it's k fabe.

Speaker 2 (17:55):
That's what it is.

Speaker 3 (17:56):
Okay.

Speaker 1 (17:57):
So this is political k fabe.

Speaker 2 (18:00):
That's exactly what it is.

Speaker 1 (18:02):
The reason I bring it up is and I haven't
talked a lot about it because I don't like slumming
it and I'm not going to debase myself and debase
this program by punching down and doing all that and
engaging in this stupidity. But TPUSA addressed it yesterday, and
because she was basically accusing the whole entire organization of
being complicit, I just think it sounds like she had

(18:24):
an unrequited crush on Charlie Kirk.

Speaker 2 (18:27):
And was scorn that he didn't return her affections.

Speaker 1 (18:30):
This sort of comes off as because some of the
stuff that she says about his widow is really petty
and caddy and chicks. No caddiness, dudes, it flies over
your head. And that's not because you're dumb. It's just
because you're not petty. Dudes are not petty. It is
like dudes have other skills, right, You guys can fix stuff.

(18:50):
Women are petty. That's a skill we got. Sometimes dudes
can be that way too, but it's very rare. It's
like a unicorn, right, it's very rare, or it doesn't exist.
But it's just, you know, the stuff that's been said
is insane. And I don't know how deeply I want
to get involved in this, like I said, because it
just it feels cheap, and there's so many other important

(19:14):
things to talk about, like actually important things. But I
think this is an organization that actually moves the needle,
and she doesn't. I mean sorry, but just sitting and
screaming into a microphone without doing anything else to help
propel the movement isn't a contribution. It's not There's tons
of people every day that talk into microphones. You know,

(19:35):
tons of people every day, and you just can't keep it,
coming up with conspiracy theory after conspiracy theory and offering
zero proof. You know, at first we were supposed to
believe that's some Egyptian plane was trailing Erica Kirk and
all this other stuff, and it's just asinine. And I
feel bad for her having to deal with us while
also going to the holiday season, mind you, dealing with
us with two little kids, an organization that she's now running,

(20:00):
and then all of this stuff in the press. And
it's all because I think Owens just wants to make money.
You can see it with Tucker Carlson's videos. The videos
where he talks to normal people about normal things, they
get no views, like maybe a thousand here or there.
The stuff that is crazy and over the top conspiratorial
gets tons of views. And it's not because people find

(20:22):
it influential. It's because they like the car wreck. That's
why they watch cops. That's why people watch reality television.
It's the attraction of the circus. They like watching things
that are crazier than they are. It makes them feel
better about their lives, right, or they just find it entertaining.
It's not that it's influential, and I think it's incredibly

(20:45):
I think it's a sign of low IQ to misinterpret
that as influence. You have an organization, as I said,
that actually does move the needle, and you have kfe
bactors who don't that just want the clicks and they
want them and they want to share of the digital economy.
You know, we had a meeting about this just yesterday.
One of the things that I've routinely refused to do

(21:06):
on this program is debase myself and to base this
program and engage in conspiratorial bs. And I also you
know a lot of these conservatives now and podcasters, and
some of them are big names, that are just now
pretending that they see this. It's not that they just
now saw that Owens was nuts. It's that they're a

(21:28):
bunch of pansy ass cowards who were too afraid to
say anything earlier. There were a lot of other very
brave conservatives out there talking it up and saying, look,
this is what's up, and this is what we know.
And these people tried playing both sides of it for
a long time, and they wanted to cover their asses
because they were too terrified of losing a slice of

(21:48):
that digital pie. Then to respect you enough to be
honest with you. That's what this is all about. And
they think you're too stupid to notice. These people aren't operatives.
Most of them are news readers. So yeah, I just
find it interesting now that a lot of people are like, wow,
who knew that she? Everybody did, But a lot of

(22:10):
the people in the conservative sphere are a bunch of
female copulatory organs, and they didn't. They lacked the spine
to say so. I mean, I'm not going to name names,
but you know who they are, and I have no
problem saying it to their blank and face. That being said, this, uh,
apparently they're going to have a debate.

Speaker 2 (22:31):
What is there to debate?

Speaker 1 (22:34):
They're gonna have a debate about all this stuff? What
is there to debate? And of course she loves it
because it's attention for her, you know, she can you know,
make money and her gay husband with the you know.

Speaker 2 (22:46):
Oh sorry, we're not supposed to say that out loud.

Speaker 1 (22:49):
Uh, can you know? Go, he's never gonna inherit his
daddy's title. That was a facing grace and favorite thing
never gonna happen. But I'm just saying so they can
make money, and they can they can hire interior designers
like David Netto and do all this stuff.

Speaker 2 (23:04):
That's what they do.

Speaker 1 (23:05):
They have their mansions and they hire these like multimillion
dollar interior designers. It's all about the grift, guys. It's
all about the grift.

Speaker 2 (23:14):
So there you go.

Speaker 1 (23:15):
Thanks for tuning in to today's edition of Dana Lash's
Absurd Toth podcast.

Speaker 3 (23:19):
If you haven't already, made sure to hit that subscribe
button on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, wherever you get your podcasts
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