December 15, 2023 • 22 mins
Incense Expert and CEO of Shihan Wellness John Launius joins us to break down how to find our zen in the madhouse that will be 2024. Meanwhile, The Dana Show compiles a list of the Top 10 Fictional Band Names that were said on-air in the year 2023
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:01):
Dana Lashes Absurd Truth podcast. It'shis laugh mission to make bad decisions.
It's time for Florida man, allright, So first up, let's see
here, I'm like being distracted.We have an elderly Florida man who is
(00:22):
assaulted by his neighbors. While wehad this on yesterday, so this is
old. I'm not doing this one. A Florida man's in custody. He
barricaded himself in a sewer pipe followinga police pursuit. In kindle, this
guy's also totally naked again. Videofrom the scene shows the moment the South
Florida Water Management stead of robotic camerainside of the pipe to check the status
(00:43):
of the dude. The guy startedaround two am on Thursday. The man
fled from Miami Dade Police. Policelost sight of him, and he disappeared
into a sewer pipe, and thenthey sent a robotic camera into the pipe
to check the status of the guyand then they managed to take him into
custody. He's being treated by MiamiDade Fire Rescue at the scene, and
(01:03):
they said they haven't released his identityor anything like that. So you know,
I mean, a Florida woman aporch pirate stole packages and then planned
to regift them for Christmas. Mmhmmm, uh yeah, yeah so this
according to Polk County Sheriff's Office,this woman, Kensley Mott, was seen
(01:26):
at the victim's home surveillance camera walkingup to the porch taking numerous Amazon boxes,
driving off in a red truck.She had her eye on the prize.
She followed the truck. She followedthis Amazon delivery truck all over the
subdivision of winter Haven, Florida,and she's just started taking after they would
deliver them. She would go upand start taking packages right off the porches
on neighborhoods between like starting a noon, broad daylight. They reviewed the surveillance
(01:49):
videos. I guess you know,people have like the doorball cameras and all
this stuff. So they started reviewingthese surveillance videos and they eventually found her
at her place of employment hungry,Howi's pizza, And when they asked her
about this, she said, no, no, no, I'm regifting them.
She's regifting the stolen items. Andthen she literally told police when they
(02:14):
showed her the video footage, shegoes, quote, what if it was
just someone else who had my face? See not wait a minute, a
sidebar. This is why I wanta fake finger as a ring, the
fake silicon finger. I want towear it on a hand so that way,
if something happens that I don't likeor something like that, then I
(02:36):
can just be like, m seethere's an extra finger here. This is
clearly AI. I've really thought aboutthis. You know, I've done a
lot of research on the silicone fingerrings. You can't really get them on
Amazon. I found like one reallygood one, but apparently they're not for
sale anymore. So I'm just saying, like, if you're into that business,
that might be you know, I'mjust saying that's going to be the
way to get out of stuff rightnow, Like, just get you a
(02:57):
fake silicone digit. Where does aring and that way, you know,
if you're on public and all that, and it's something I'm just saying,
you can be like, no,no, no, see I don't have
that many fingers. That clearly isAI. Can they prove that you were
wearing a fake silicon finger in thephoto? No they can't. They can't.
I'm just saying, I'm just I'mnot like trying to encourage you to
break the law or anything. I'mjust saying it might be nice to have
(03:20):
that, you know. I'm justthat's a little little extra. Anyway,
they did, they did get herin arrest her, and of course she
was crying when they arrested her.Of course she was. I mean that
just so like you're following around adelivery truck, if you're the delivery driver
too, do you note at onepoint that you're being followed around by the
delivery truck. I'm just wondering.Yeah, uh, I don't even know
(03:43):
how to read this. This headline, A Florida man pours eye drops on
his nephew sandwich to make him quotepuke his brains out. Pinela Sparkman is
accused of putting eye drops in hisnephew sandwich in an attempt to make him
sick Godly, they said that thewitness. According to arrest report, a
(04:04):
witness reported a customer asking for abottle of vising eye drops while purchasing food
and an unnamed business on Wednesday.The witness told police that the customer,
identified as James Leech, said hewas having issues with his nephew, hated
him, and then after handing himthe eye drops. The witness that he
opened the bottle and poured it allover the meatball sandwich. The witness stated
that that could hurt someone, andthe defendant responded by saying it would only
(04:26):
cause him to quote blank himself andpuke his brains out. And then he,
I mean, and apparently there's videofootage inside the business where you can
see him doing all this stuff.And the nephew said that he ate a
small part of the sandwich and didknow what may have been tampered with.
He didn't accept medical treatment, andthe I mean, what in the world,
like, what is wrong with you? I don't know how old the
(04:47):
nephew is. But the guy who'sforty five years old, the guy they
arrested him. But the guy's likeforty five years old, And I mean,
I don't does it really do that? I don't know. Man.
Let's see here this Florida woman.Florida woman was arrested for Walmart theft,
drunken hit and run crash in thesame day Flaker County, Florida. Forty
(05:09):
six year old Lettery in Emily.She gets in trouble for petty theft and
then and then she immediately ride afterDui and Pom Kosting Flaker County Police.
John Lnis is a he's a literalpotions master. I mean he's got like
all professionals. I could say,he's like per president of this average core
advertising group and he's got very importanttitles. But he's I mean, I
(05:31):
legit would be like potion's master andonly goes that. He is literally like
he's just let me read this,a certified master, like you can get
certified for this in the ancient Japanesetradition of kodo the wave incense for over
a decade, and he holds therank of kane of a komoto that is
(05:54):
a literal Japanese master of incense ceremony. That's a literal thing. See,
he's the actual potions master. Yeah. Well potions isn't exactly accurate. It's
just a fun word, right.Yeah. And John joins us now via
Skype. John, it's a pleasureto have you. Thank you for joining
us again this moment. So firstoff, that you had to go through
like a whole thing to get certifiedin all of this, can k you
(06:17):
flick and the scent to me?Yeah? Tell you yeah, so real
quick. When I was nine yearsold, I started studying martial arts at
World Incense Traditions. Then when Iwas thirteen, I trained under a certified
master in the way of incense it'scalled Kodo for a period of ten years.
So I've been doing incense for overforty years now. You could run
Bath and Body Works out of businessbasically, I can totally do that.
(06:41):
Yeah, but you know you're you'retalking about like getting rid of all these
emotions and what have you. Imean, what you're really accessing, what
you're talking about is the limbic system, which is that part of our body,
a part of our brain that reallycontrols the emotions. And so you
know, we could be working onthe hypothalamus, on the amygdala, on
the thalamus, on the hippocampus withoutgetting into two bigger words, right,
(07:01):
But there's also yeah, well soyou were just having that experience with the
frankensents, You're like, it smellsgood and you started to relax and you
started to maybe have less kind ofyou know, negative thoughts or thoughts that
are moving around that. Well,that's what I do for people internationally,
celebrities, businesses and individuals. Butit's a way to center the mind and
deal with all the chaos that wedeal with every day, and especially in
(07:25):
the world of politics. I don'tknow if you know anything about that.
So you're telling me that they needmore of this on Twitter, I think
so, oh, you know what. And by the way, when I
was on your show last year,the amount of just hate that came at
me when I was literally talking aboutgifts for Baby Jesus, I mean,
it was amazing to me. Theyneed more of Jesus's gifts because this if
(07:48):
you smell the was that the Franks, and it's You're like, I'm you're
chill. They need I hate thatyou had to do that, Like you
can't even tweet anymore because of thesepeople. You literally then you leave Twitter.
I did well. I mean Istill have an account, but I
mean it's like it was just amazingto me, Like I'm on your show.
We're having this wonderful conversation about theuse of frankincense and murr and it
(08:11):
was it was amazing, Like justthe amount of names I got called names
that have nothing to do. Butthen that's okay, that's okay, listen,
listen. I'm I'm a strong bigboy. I can handle it,
and I've got sent on my side. You know what I mean. I
love that I got sent on myside. You just burned some of Jesus's
gifts and you feel better. Whywere those We're talking to John Monnis,
who's literally like a master of thisstuff. There's a lot of I mean,
(08:33):
there's like a whole certification here whythose specifically were ended up being so
popular and sort of like now forevera part of human history that Frankinson's the
murr. I don't even know ifI'm saying that correctly. Murry, that's
right here, you are right,Yeah, you're saying it right. So,
so the research suggests that the wisemen would have been Zoroastrian priests.
(08:54):
Yeah, and they they held alot of the information around health and wellness,
and so frank and sense. Forexample, the Male Clinic and and
other very large medical organizations are beginningto really use frankincense to help the body
with a number of things lung issues, arthritis, et cetera, and so
frankensense not only calms the mind,clears the mind, but it also helps
(09:18):
it's an antibacterial and anti mecrobial,and so it's it's it's healthy. So
also with murr, same kind ofthing, but you can actually you can
eat murr. You can eat frankencense, and so it's a way to really
have the body be cleansed inside andout. In a very short explanation,
that's like brilliant is can you burntoo much of it? Well, you're
(09:39):
not. He's not. I shouldknow. King's not burning it. And
he keeps telling me that over andover again. He's like, I'm not
burning a data that's more pollute.That's not going to be a real word
polluting. Well, yeah, polluting, I like that. Well. So
in short, it's like this isthat most incense in America is synthetic.
It's filled with a whole bunch ofthings that that are not pure. Therefore,
(10:03):
when you're burning that, you canget you know, indoor air pollution.
But if you're warming all natural fragrances, there is benefit in the in
the aromatic medicine as it languaged inone way. But but by warming it,
you're minimizing the amount of smoke andyou're maximizing the fragrance, uh and
all the chemicals that come along withit that help again calm the mind,
(10:24):
have us recenter within ourselves again.To be able to deal with the chaos
of the world. We're talking withJohn Lannis, who's like an expert in
basically he could run all the Sensey, the bath and Body Works, all
those people out of business. Uhthis, and we're talking we're I mean,
because it's I just find this fascinating. So this you made a very
good point with the Uh, Iguess some of like the chemicals and stuff
(10:48):
that they can put in some ofthe manufactured stuff. So you got to
be like really picky about where youget your stuff from. Yeah, there's
only three companies that I currently usein the entire world. Wow. Yeah.
And so these are things that Ihave vetted over the forty years of
teaching and training and leading groups.I mean, like, we literally do
this for corporations, we do thisfor individuals, we do this for people
(11:11):
of note. And it's it's anincredible experience. It's called the incense journey.
And you're getting your own sense ofit through Cain in the studio.
But you'll notice that you that you'rethat you don't have as much anxiety maybe
as you normally do when you're inthe presence of that. So imagine every
day being able to really have morecontrol over your mind to be able to
then put the attention where you needto put it when you need to put
(11:33):
it there. You have to sendlike special people out to get this stuff
because like some of this, Idon't even know where you get some where
does one get frankincense, Like whereit's not like, yeah, it's not
like it grows wild And I don'teven know it's a tree, right,
it's set or it's set it isit? Yeah? Yeah, So frank
and sense is a tree. Ifyou imagine the continent of Africa and you
(11:54):
drew a very thin line across thetop of Africa, that that is where
frankincense grows and other places as well, but close to there. So what
happens is that three times a yearthey actually cut into the tree, causing
the sap to come out and thento and then to dry and then you're
taking that off. And so frankensenseis an autoimmune reaction to you know,
(12:20):
danger with the tree or some kindof a damage. Same thing with earth.
Yeah, well so well so sothis look a little bit at the
Egyptian tradition. So, so theEgyptians talked about frankensense as being sweat of
the gods. So when you holdup frankensense, it looks it looks like
if you were to take sweat andthen you know, amalgamate it into a
(12:41):
resin. But the point is isthat it has connotations with the sun,
It has connotations with a number ofthings. But because it elevates our consciousness,
it literally focuses us in a waydifferent from everything else. That's why
it's been praised and used for thousandsof years. So this was like a
really nice gift that these Aurastrian priestsbrought Jesus. This was like going to
(13:03):
Neemens and getting one of those big, old fancy once in a lifetime gifts.
Like what they brought him was likepretty amazing. Yeah. Well,
at the time, frankincense would havebeen double in value of gold. Oh
my gosh. And they brought alot. I mean, I don't remember
exactly how much they brought it.They brought quite a bit. That's amazing.
Double the value in gold of gold, that's crazy. Yeah. Well,
(13:28):
and just like we talked about lastyear, we also saw that frankensons,
well actually mirror specifically shows up atthe crucifixion, So we have incense
at the birth and the death ofJesus, which is very symbolic. And
so the whole idea is is thatif we just take the night before the
crucifixion when when Mary anointed the feetof Jesus with spikenard, very costly.
(13:50):
Spikenard is another incense. In thiscase, it was an oil, but
it will literally relax you deeper thananything else you've ever had. So what
Mary doing for Jesus and the discipleswas to relax them and really to have
them commune and be in the samespace together the day before the crucifixion.
Wow, that is amazing. Idid not know that. That is absolutely
(14:13):
amazing. John Lawnis who Well,I'm afraid to give everybody your Twitter account
now because people out there are suchjerks. They need to burn more incense
and chill out is what they needto do. I so appreciate you joining
us on this, and I justthink that's very cool. Where can people
find you and find your recommendations andstuff. What's a good place to go?
Yeah, So what I would dois I would go to Instagram.
(14:33):
It's at shehan Underscore Wellness. SoSheihan Underscore Wellness you can connect with me
there. You can also send anemail to Sihan Wellness at gmail dot com
and then we'll go from there.Sounds great. Thank you so much for
doing this. And I want toadd too that John also works with veterans
and he helps work with helps tomanage their PTSD and all of that stuff.
So you do a lot of great, great stuff for folks. So
(14:54):
thank you so much for doing thatand for joining us today. We'd love
to have you pack. Thanks somuch, Thanks Dana, Thanks Dani,
Chris e Americ Christmas, the bike, and now all of the news you
would probably miss. It's time forDana's Quick five. Just trying to repost
a meme. All right, Sothe lockdown effect Americans physical and mental health
(15:16):
has deteriorated by every metric since thepandemic. And they say that it's you
know, it's all the lockdowns andall of that stuff that's what's to blame.
They say that half of the world'sgoing to have a mental condition by
age of seventy five. I'm sotired of this. I am so tired
of this. I am so tiredof it. I'm tired of hearing that
everybody big pharma is trying to makeyou believe that you need all this stuff
(15:39):
wrong with you so that you cantake their pills forever. That's what they
want. They release this. Theysurveyed five thousand adults and they track their
changes in mental and physical conditions.Have you ever thought that maybe things are
stressful because stupid people are also makingthings stressful. Weak men create hard times.
We're in that position right now.I don't know if people realize that,
but that's where we are. So, uh, this is an NBC
(16:00):
story. They're saying that race playeda role in the sentencing of this ten
year old boy for urinating in public. So this kid, he's a ten
year old kid who urinated in publicin August. He was sentenced to three
months probation and they said it's becausehe's black. He's in third grade.
He was arrested on August tenth aftera police officer saw him relieving himself next
(16:22):
to his mom's car when she wasinside an attorney's office. And they said
that anybody would have done the samething given that, or any child would
have done the same thing given thecircumstances. There was no public restroom at
the attorney's office. He had togo. There was no bathroom available to
him, and I just like,really, you got to get the courts
involved for this is now is ita question of race or is it like
(16:45):
there are some people in positions inthis town? According to the story,
was he had to write a storyabout Kobe Bryant. That's stupid. What
is that about? That is stupid. That is so stupid. They said
that he's not gonna They said it'sprobation. He's not gonna have a criminal
CARECT record. It's a two pagereport and he has to check in with
a probation officer for once a month, for three months. That is so
(17:07):
stupid. That is so unbelievably dumb. I just want to rage at this.
This is ridiculous. They said that. I mean, he's ten years
old. He's ten years old.His mom was inside, she ran inside.
Oh my gosh, she's ten.Guys, come on, and it's
a senatobia in Mississippi. I don'tknow like what their party makeup is there,
(17:30):
but I'd be shocked if the peoplerunning that town are Republican. Just
saying, just saying, all right, so apparently park Hill there's in Denver,
there's a neighborhood in Denver where somebody'sbeen raiding houses and stealing stealing ladies'
painties. They said that some neighborsin this Denver community aren't high alert.
(17:53):
A man's been breaking into their homesand stealing women's underwear. He's called the
park Hill Panty Thief Way to givehim an that he's probably going to enjoy.
Guys. I mean, they saidthat he passed over PlayStations, computers,
jewelry, just took women's under Yeah, just took women's underwear. It's
the matter with you, like,why are you're not stealing any of the
good stuff? Don't take I'm notsaying that as advice an auto industry I
(18:17):
subscription fees. This is so dumb. So you can pay monthly for heated
seeds and cruise control. Are youserious with me right now? That is
so dumb. That's so dumb.All right, Welcome back to the program,
Dana, last year with you.It's our last broadcast of this year,
twenty twenty three, and we areback behind the mic on January third.
(18:40):
Now. One of the things thatwe do all throughout the year.
I don't know when we started thisten years ago is we have a really
good at naming bands and apparently alsobars. But we you know, all
of this came out of just thedaily news cycle from the past year.
So it's like you'll hear a phraseand you're like, man, that sounds
like a great band name. Socaineadds it to the list, and so
(19:02):
we've made and by we, he'smade a top ten list of the top
ten fictitional fictitious band names of twentytwenty three. Kine, yes, ma'am.
And by the way, there waslike fifty or sixty. We average
about one a week on the showevery year, and so out of that
fifty to sixty, I have towhittle it down to these. This is
(19:22):
my favorite one fabulous ten and thenwe have some honorable mentions as well.
So at number ten, drum rollplease. Number ten is liquid Meth.
Yes, liquid Math. I lovethem. Be your favorite, They're one
of my favorites. Yes, loveliquid Math. I don't even know if
you can liquefy math, but it'sgreat. I mean the name, not
(19:42):
like the math. I don't knowhow the math is done either. Merry
Christmas, all right. Number nineis Personal Riot. Yes, I do
this daily Personal riot you should have. Everybody should have their own personal absolutely
going to have a personal riot righthere and right here in Walmart. Number
(20:03):
eight needs a little bit of anexplanation. This one is, uh does
it though? Number eight is BigGay Baby. Yes, I love Big
Gay Baby BGB. What now?What is this though? This is when
we were doing the story on thethe trans people. Dude. Yeah,
there literally will also appropriate an agelike not only will like a sixty year
(20:25):
old dude say that he's a chick, but then he'll be like, oh,
not just any chick, a tenyear old check exactly, or a
six year old or something GB BigGay Baby, Oh boy? Was number
eight? Number seven love that onelesbian dudes? Lesbian dudes. That sounds
like, uh, what's that onelesbian duo where they sing that one song
(20:47):
Galileo? Oh man, what isit? No Intego girls, thank you.
That's like an Indigo Girls cover band. So it's like two people who
just do into Indigo Girl songs.Yeah, ladies and gentlemen, it's lesbian
dudes, all right. That wasnumber seven. Number six seizing the pounds,
(21:07):
which is appropriate after lesbian dude seizingthe pounds, Seizing the pounds and
because that happens often with the pounds. Yeah, that's how the media treats
us. I need to shut up. Let you just chusing the pounds.
Number five, first Lady death Man, Yes, first Lady death Man.
I want that patch. That soundslike a fun time. This one's interesting.
Yeah. Number four I think weknow where this came from. And
this was your This isn't actually thiswas you. Sound like a sandwich.
(21:30):
This was you. Just so youknow, this is all you, Frank
Enginer. Well, in my defense, that's what happens if you have like
the mutilation surgery. Okay, goahead, Sorry, Wow, that was
number you got three more. Numberthree, fatal sound pollution. Fatal sound
pollution. Number two, illicit meat. You had that one just yesterday.
And the number one number one Philthe Fan Bear, dream Roll Playground Wheah
(22:00):
by the bus Lord and their firstalbum is Our Long Molly Oh my favorite.
All right, I think I havetime to mention these last few missing
Biscuits, Flag Team Rejects, BobcatAttack, rat Zar. Those are the
honorable mentions. There you go.Thanks for tuning in to today's edition of
Dana Lash's Absurd Truth Podcast. Ifyou haven't already made sure to hit that
subscribe button on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, wherever you get your podcasts.
Dana Lashes Absurd Truth podcast. It'shis laugh mission to make bad decisions.
It's time for Florida man, allright, So first up, let's see
here, I'm like being distracted.We have an elderly Florida man who is
(00:22):
assaulted by his neighbors. While wehad this on yesterday, so this is
old. I'm not doing this one. A Florida man's in custody. He
barricaded himself in a sewer pipe followinga police pursuit. In kindle, this
guy's also totally naked again. Videofrom the scene shows the moment the South
Florida Water Management stead of robotic camerainside of the pipe to check the status
(00:43):
of the dude. The guy startedaround two am on Thursday. The man
fled from Miami Dade Police. Policelost sight of him, and he disappeared
into a sewer pipe, and thenthey sent a robotic camera into the pipe
to check the status of the guyand then they managed to take him into
custody. He's being treated by MiamiDade Fire Rescue at the scene, and
(01:03):
they said they haven't released his identityor anything like that. So you know,
I mean, a Florida woman aporch pirate stole packages and then planned
to regift them for Christmas. Mmhmmm, uh yeah, yeah so this
according to Polk County Sheriff's Office,this woman, Kensley Mott, was seen
(01:26):
at the victim's home surveillance camera walkingup to the porch taking numerous Amazon boxes,
driving off in a red truck.She had her eye on the prize.
She followed the truck. She followedthis Amazon delivery truck all over the
subdivision of winter Haven, Florida,and she's just started taking after they would
deliver them. She would go upand start taking packages right off the porches
on neighborhoods between like starting a noon, broad daylight. They reviewed the surveillance
(01:49):
videos. I guess you know,people have like the doorball cameras and all
this stuff. So they started reviewingthese surveillance videos and they eventually found her
at her place of employment hungry,Howi's pizza, And when they asked her
about this, she said, no, no, no, I'm regifting them.
She's regifting the stolen items. Andthen she literally told police when they
(02:14):
showed her the video footage, shegoes, quote, what if it was
just someone else who had my face? See not wait a minute, a
sidebar. This is why I wanta fake finger as a ring, the
fake silicon finger. I want towear it on a hand so that way,
if something happens that I don't likeor something like that, then I
(02:36):
can just be like, m seethere's an extra finger here. This is
clearly AI. I've really thought aboutthis. You know, I've done a
lot of research on the silicone fingerrings. You can't really get them on
Amazon. I found like one reallygood one, but apparently they're not for
sale anymore. So I'm just saying, like, if you're into that business,
that might be you know, I'mjust saying that's going to be the
way to get out of stuff rightnow, Like, just get you a
(02:57):
fake silicone digit. Where does aring and that way, you know,
if you're on public and all that, and it's something I'm just saying,
you can be like, no,no, no, see I don't have
that many fingers. That clearly isAI. Can they prove that you were
wearing a fake silicon finger in thephoto? No they can't. They can't.
I'm just saying, I'm just I'mnot like trying to encourage you to
break the law or anything. I'mjust saying it might be nice to have
(03:20):
that, you know. I'm justthat's a little little extra. Anyway,
they did, they did get herin arrest her, and of course she
was crying when they arrested her.Of course she was. I mean that
just so like you're following around adelivery truck, if you're the delivery driver
too, do you note at onepoint that you're being followed around by the
delivery truck. I'm just wondering.Yeah, uh, I don't even know
(03:43):
how to read this. This headline, A Florida man pours eye drops on
his nephew sandwich to make him quotepuke his brains out. Pinela Sparkman is
accused of putting eye drops in hisnephew sandwich in an attempt to make him
sick Godly, they said that thewitness. According to arrest report, a
(04:04):
witness reported a customer asking for abottle of vising eye drops while purchasing food
and an unnamed business on Wednesday.The witness told police that the customer,
identified as James Leech, said hewas having issues with his nephew, hated
him, and then after handing himthe eye drops. The witness that he
opened the bottle and poured it allover the meatball sandwich. The witness stated
that that could hurt someone, andthe defendant responded by saying it would only
(04:26):
cause him to quote blank himself andpuke his brains out. And then he,
I mean, and apparently there's videofootage inside the business where you can
see him doing all this stuff.And the nephew said that he ate a
small part of the sandwich and didknow what may have been tampered with.
He didn't accept medical treatment, andthe I mean, what in the world,
like, what is wrong with you? I don't know how old the
(04:47):
nephew is. But the guy who'sforty five years old, the guy they
arrested him. But the guy's likeforty five years old, And I mean,
I don't does it really do that? I don't know. Man.
Let's see here this Florida woman.Florida woman was arrested for Walmart theft,
drunken hit and run crash in thesame day Flaker County, Florida. Forty
(05:09):
six year old Lettery in Emily.She gets in trouble for petty theft and
then and then she immediately ride afterDui and Pom Kosting Flaker County Police.
John Lnis is a he's a literalpotions master. I mean he's got like
all professionals. I could say,he's like per president of this average core
advertising group and he's got very importanttitles. But he's I mean, I
(05:31):
legit would be like potion's master andonly goes that. He is literally like
he's just let me read this,a certified master, like you can get
certified for this in the ancient Japanesetradition of kodo the wave incense for over
a decade, and he holds therank of kane of a komoto that is
(05:54):
a literal Japanese master of incense ceremony. That's a literal thing. See,
he's the actual potions master. Yeah. Well potions isn't exactly accurate. It's
just a fun word, right.Yeah. And John joins us now via
Skype. John, it's a pleasureto have you. Thank you for joining
us again this moment. So firstoff, that you had to go through
like a whole thing to get certifiedin all of this, can k you
(06:17):
flick and the scent to me?Yeah? Tell you yeah, so real
quick. When I was nine yearsold, I started studying martial arts at
World Incense Traditions. Then when Iwas thirteen, I trained under a certified
master in the way of incense it'scalled Kodo for a period of ten years.
So I've been doing incense for overforty years now. You could run
Bath and Body Works out of businessbasically, I can totally do that.
(06:41):
Yeah, but you know you're you'retalking about like getting rid of all these
emotions and what have you. Imean, what you're really accessing, what
you're talking about is the limbic system, which is that part of our body,
a part of our brain that reallycontrols the emotions. And so you
know, we could be working onthe hypothalamus, on the amygdala, on
the thalamus, on the hippocampus withoutgetting into two bigger words, right,
(07:01):
But there's also yeah, well soyou were just having that experience with the
frankensents, You're like, it smellsgood and you started to relax and you
started to maybe have less kind ofyou know, negative thoughts or thoughts that
are moving around that. Well,that's what I do for people internationally,
celebrities, businesses and individuals. Butit's a way to center the mind and
deal with all the chaos that wedeal with every day, and especially in
(07:25):
the world of politics. I don'tknow if you know anything about that.
So you're telling me that they needmore of this on Twitter, I think
so, oh, you know what. And by the way, when I
was on your show last year,the amount of just hate that came at
me when I was literally talking aboutgifts for Baby Jesus, I mean,
it was amazing to me. Theyneed more of Jesus's gifts because this if
(07:48):
you smell the was that the Franks, and it's You're like, I'm you're
chill. They need I hate thatyou had to do that, Like you
can't even tweet anymore because of thesepeople. You literally then you leave Twitter.
I did well. I mean Istill have an account, but I
mean it's like it was just amazingto me, Like I'm on your show.
We're having this wonderful conversation about theuse of frankincense and murr and it
(08:11):
was it was amazing, Like justthe amount of names I got called names
that have nothing to do. Butthen that's okay, that's okay, listen,
listen. I'm I'm a strong bigboy. I can handle it,
and I've got sent on my side. You know what I mean. I
love that I got sent on myside. You just burned some of Jesus's
gifts and you feel better. Whywere those We're talking to John Monnis,
who's literally like a master of thisstuff. There's a lot of I mean,
(08:33):
there's like a whole certification here whythose specifically were ended up being so
popular and sort of like now forevera part of human history that Frankinson's the
murr. I don't even know ifI'm saying that correctly. Murry, that's
right here, you are right,Yeah, you're saying it right. So,
so the research suggests that the wisemen would have been Zoroastrian priests.
(08:54):
Yeah, and they they held alot of the information around health and wellness,
and so frank and sense. Forexample, the Male Clinic and and
other very large medical organizations are beginningto really use frankincense to help the body
with a number of things lung issues, arthritis, et cetera, and so
frankensense not only calms the mind,clears the mind, but it also helps
(09:18):
it's an antibacterial and anti mecrobial,and so it's it's it's healthy. So
also with murr, same kind ofthing, but you can actually you can
eat murr. You can eat frankencense, and so it's a way to really
have the body be cleansed inside andout. In a very short explanation,
that's like brilliant is can you burntoo much of it? Well, you're
(09:39):
not. He's not. I shouldknow. King's not burning it. And
he keeps telling me that over andover again. He's like, I'm not
burning a data that's more pollute.That's not going to be a real word
polluting. Well, yeah, polluting, I like that. Well. So
in short, it's like this isthat most incense in America is synthetic.
It's filled with a whole bunch ofthings that that are not pure. Therefore,
(10:03):
when you're burning that, you canget you know, indoor air pollution.
But if you're warming all natural fragrances, there is benefit in the in
the aromatic medicine as it languaged inone way. But but by warming it,
you're minimizing the amount of smoke andyou're maximizing the fragrance, uh and
all the chemicals that come along withit that help again calm the mind,
(10:24):
have us recenter within ourselves again.To be able to deal with the chaos
of the world. We're talking withJohn Lannis, who's like an expert in
basically he could run all the Sensey, the bath and Body Works, all
those people out of business. Uhthis, and we're talking we're I mean,
because it's I just find this fascinating. So this you made a very
good point with the Uh, Iguess some of like the chemicals and stuff
(10:48):
that they can put in some ofthe manufactured stuff. So you got to
be like really picky about where youget your stuff from. Yeah, there's
only three companies that I currently usein the entire world. Wow. Yeah.
And so these are things that Ihave vetted over the forty years of
teaching and training and leading groups.I mean, like, we literally do
this for corporations, we do thisfor individuals, we do this for people
(11:11):
of note. And it's it's anincredible experience. It's called the incense journey.
And you're getting your own sense ofit through Cain in the studio.
But you'll notice that you that you'rethat you don't have as much anxiety maybe
as you normally do when you're inthe presence of that. So imagine every
day being able to really have morecontrol over your mind to be able to
then put the attention where you needto put it when you need to put
(11:33):
it there. You have to sendlike special people out to get this stuff
because like some of this, Idon't even know where you get some where
does one get frankincense, Like whereit's not like, yeah, it's not
like it grows wild And I don'teven know it's a tree, right,
it's set or it's set it isit? Yeah? Yeah, So frank
and sense is a tree. Ifyou imagine the continent of Africa and you
(11:54):
drew a very thin line across thetop of Africa, that that is where
frankincense grows and other places as well, but close to there. So what
happens is that three times a yearthey actually cut into the tree, causing
the sap to come out and thento and then to dry and then you're
taking that off. And so frankensenseis an autoimmune reaction to you know,
(12:20):
danger with the tree or some kindof a damage. Same thing with earth.
Yeah, well so well so sothis look a little bit at the
Egyptian tradition. So, so theEgyptians talked about frankensense as being sweat of
the gods. So when you holdup frankensense, it looks it looks like
if you were to take sweat andthen you know, amalgamate it into a
(12:41):
resin. But the point is isthat it has connotations with the sun,
It has connotations with a number ofthings. But because it elevates our consciousness,
it literally focuses us in a waydifferent from everything else. That's why
it's been praised and used for thousandsof years. So this was like a
really nice gift that these Aurastrian priestsbrought Jesus. This was like going to
(13:03):
Neemens and getting one of those big, old fancy once in a lifetime gifts.
Like what they brought him was likepretty amazing. Yeah. Well,
at the time, frankincense would havebeen double in value of gold. Oh
my gosh. And they brought alot. I mean, I don't remember
exactly how much they brought it.They brought quite a bit. That's amazing.
Double the value in gold of gold, that's crazy. Yeah. Well,
(13:28):
and just like we talked about lastyear, we also saw that frankensons,
well actually mirror specifically shows up atthe crucifixion, So we have incense
at the birth and the death ofJesus, which is very symbolic. And
so the whole idea is is thatif we just take the night before the
crucifixion when when Mary anointed the feetof Jesus with spikenard, very costly.
(13:50):
Spikenard is another incense. In thiscase, it was an oil, but
it will literally relax you deeper thananything else you've ever had. So what
Mary doing for Jesus and the discipleswas to relax them and really to have
them commune and be in the samespace together the day before the crucifixion.
Wow, that is amazing. Idid not know that. That is absolutely
(14:13):
amazing. John Lawnis who Well,I'm afraid to give everybody your Twitter account
now because people out there are suchjerks. They need to burn more incense
and chill out is what they needto do. I so appreciate you joining
us on this, and I justthink that's very cool. Where can people
find you and find your recommendations andstuff. What's a good place to go?
Yeah, So what I would dois I would go to Instagram.
(14:33):
It's at shehan Underscore Wellness. SoSheihan Underscore Wellness you can connect with me
there. You can also send anemail to Sihan Wellness at gmail dot com
and then we'll go from there.Sounds great. Thank you so much for
doing this. And I want toadd too that John also works with veterans
and he helps work with helps tomanage their PTSD and all of that stuff.
So you do a lot of great, great stuff for folks. So
(14:54):
thank you so much for doing thatand for joining us today. We'd love
to have you pack. Thanks somuch, Thanks Dana, Thanks Dani,
Chris e Americ Christmas, the bike, and now all of the news you
would probably miss. It's time forDana's Quick five. Just trying to repost
a meme. All right, Sothe lockdown effect Americans physical and mental health
(15:16):
has deteriorated by every metric since thepandemic. And they say that it's you
know, it's all the lockdowns andall of that stuff that's what's to blame.
They say that half of the world'sgoing to have a mental condition by
age of seventy five. I'm sotired of this. I am so tired
of this. I am so tiredof it. I'm tired of hearing that
everybody big pharma is trying to makeyou believe that you need all this stuff
(15:39):
wrong with you so that you cantake their pills forever. That's what they
want. They release this. Theysurveyed five thousand adults and they track their
changes in mental and physical conditions.Have you ever thought that maybe things are
stressful because stupid people are also makingthings stressful. Weak men create hard times.
We're in that position right now.I don't know if people realize that,
but that's where we are. So, uh, this is an NBC
(16:00):
story. They're saying that race playeda role in the sentencing of this ten
year old boy for urinating in public. So this kid, he's a ten
year old kid who urinated in publicin August. He was sentenced to three
months probation and they said it's becausehe's black. He's in third grade.
He was arrested on August tenth aftera police officer saw him relieving himself next
(16:22):
to his mom's car when she wasinside an attorney's office. And they said
that anybody would have done the samething given that, or any child would
have done the same thing given thecircumstances. There was no public restroom at
the attorney's office. He had togo. There was no bathroom available to
him, and I just like,really, you got to get the courts
involved for this is now is ita question of race or is it like
(16:45):
there are some people in positions inthis town? According to the story,
was he had to write a storyabout Kobe Bryant. That's stupid. What
is that about? That is stupid. That is so stupid. They said
that he's not gonna They said it'sprobation. He's not gonna have a criminal
CARECT record. It's a two pagereport and he has to check in with
a probation officer for once a month, for three months. That is so
(17:07):
stupid. That is so unbelievably dumb. I just want to rage at this.
This is ridiculous. They said that. I mean, he's ten years
old. He's ten years old.His mom was inside, she ran inside.
Oh my gosh, she's ten.Guys, come on, and it's
a senatobia in Mississippi. I don'tknow like what their party makeup is there,
(17:30):
but I'd be shocked if the peoplerunning that town are Republican. Just
saying, just saying, all right, so apparently park Hill there's in Denver,
there's a neighborhood in Denver where somebody'sbeen raiding houses and stealing stealing ladies'
painties. They said that some neighborsin this Denver community aren't high alert.
(17:53):
A man's been breaking into their homesand stealing women's underwear. He's called the
park Hill Panty Thief Way to givehim an that he's probably going to enjoy.
Guys. I mean, they saidthat he passed over PlayStations, computers,
jewelry, just took women's under Yeah, just took women's underwear. It's
the matter with you, like,why are you're not stealing any of the
good stuff? Don't take I'm notsaying that as advice an auto industry I
(18:17):
subscription fees. This is so dumb. So you can pay monthly for heated
seeds and cruise control. Are youserious with me right now? That is
so dumb. That's so dumb.All right, Welcome back to the program,
Dana, last year with you.It's our last broadcast of this year,
twenty twenty three, and we areback behind the mic on January third.
(18:40):
Now. One of the things thatwe do all throughout the year.
I don't know when we started thisten years ago is we have a really
good at naming bands and apparently alsobars. But we you know, all
of this came out of just thedaily news cycle from the past year.
So it's like you'll hear a phraseand you're like, man, that sounds
like a great band name. Socaineadds it to the list, and so
(19:02):
we've made and by we, he'smade a top ten list of the top
ten fictitional fictitious band names of twentytwenty three. Kine, yes, ma'am.
And by the way, there waslike fifty or sixty. We average
about one a week on the showevery year, and so out of that
fifty to sixty, I have towhittle it down to these. This is
(19:22):
my favorite one fabulous ten and thenwe have some honorable mentions as well.
So at number ten, drum rollplease. Number ten is liquid Meth.
Yes, liquid Math. I lovethem. Be your favorite, They're one
of my favorites. Yes, loveliquid Math. I don't even know if
you can liquefy math, but it'sgreat. I mean the name, not
(19:42):
like the math. I don't knowhow the math is done either. Merry
Christmas, all right. Number nineis Personal Riot. Yes, I do
this daily Personal riot you should have. Everybody should have their own personal absolutely
going to have a personal riot righthere and right here in Walmart. Number
(20:03):
eight needs a little bit of anexplanation. This one is, uh does
it though? Number eight is BigGay Baby. Yes, I love Big
Gay Baby BGB. What now?What is this though? This is when
we were doing the story on thethe trans people. Dude. Yeah,
there literally will also appropriate an agelike not only will like a sixty year
(20:25):
old dude say that he's a chick, but then he'll be like, oh,
not just any chick, a tenyear old check exactly, or a
six year old or something GB BigGay Baby, Oh boy? Was number
eight? Number seven love that onelesbian dudes? Lesbian dudes. That sounds
like, uh, what's that onelesbian duo where they sing that one song
(20:47):
Galileo? Oh man, what isit? No Intego girls, thank you.
That's like an Indigo Girls cover band. So it's like two people who
just do into Indigo Girl songs.Yeah, ladies and gentlemen, it's lesbian
dudes, all right. That wasnumber seven. Number six seizing the pounds,
(21:07):
which is appropriate after lesbian dude seizingthe pounds, Seizing the pounds and
because that happens often with the pounds. Yeah, that's how the media treats
us. I need to shut up. Let you just chusing the pounds.
Number five, first Lady death Man, Yes, first Lady death Man.
I want that patch. That soundslike a fun time. This one's interesting.
Yeah. Number four I think weknow where this came from. And
this was your This isn't actually thiswas you. Sound like a sandwich.
(21:30):
This was you. Just so youknow, this is all you, Frank
Enginer. Well, in my defense, that's what happens if you have like
the mutilation surgery. Okay, goahead, Sorry, Wow, that was
number you got three more. Numberthree, fatal sound pollution. Fatal sound
pollution. Number two, illicit meat. You had that one just yesterday.
And the number one number one Philthe Fan Bear, dream Roll Playground Wheah
(22:00):
by the bus Lord and their firstalbum is Our Long Molly Oh my favorite.
All right, I think I havetime to mention these last few missing
Biscuits, Flag Team Rejects, BobcatAttack, rat Zar. Those are the
honorable mentions. There you go.Thanks for tuning in to today's edition of
Dana Lash's Absurd Truth Podcast. Ifyou haven't already made sure to hit that
subscribe button on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, wherever you get your podcasts.
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