May 21, 2025 • 49 mins
Think dating apps are a minefield? Try being a single dad with a 6’3” frame, an ag degree, and zero time for filters or BS.
Meet Paulo — farmer, world traveler, and real-life dating detective. From women who literally framed his picture after one date (yikes) to others who looked nothing like their profile (surprise!), Paulo has seen things.
But he's not jaded. He’s just honest. He’s got one priority: protecting his daughter from dating drama. And his rule? No dragging old baggage into new connections. (Also, if you baby-talk to your dog, he will judge you.)
This one’s for anyone who’s been ghosted, catfished, or just wants to hear a dude say “I used to be a pompous ass” and actually mean it.
Tap in for laughs, cringe, and a refreshing reminder that real is still sexy.
A big shoutout to our amazing sponsor, Tactical Tax Strategies! You can check them out at steptax.com. Remember, we drop your drawers, and they drop the tax—making life a little smoother for everyone. Thanks for keeping us covered!
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
Oh my god, I just totally got catfished.
He looks absolutely nothinglike his picture.
Speaker 2 (00:06):
So I found out, the guy that I've been dating is
married with kids.
His wife just reached out to me.
Speaker 1 (00:15):
Welcome to the meat market.
The single scene is aslaughterhouse and we are here
to devour it.
We are your hosts.
I'm Lindsay, I'm Jess andtoday's sizzling single is Paolo
.
Welcome.
Thanks for coming here.
Speaker 3 (00:30):
Thank you for having me.
Speaker 1 (00:30):
So you have never been married, but now you feel
like you're ready and you wantit.
So why are you ready now?
What changed?
Speaker 3 (00:39):
I don't know.
I think just just over time.
And you know, having a daughterand knowing what I want, Before
, when I was younger, I didn'tknow really what I wanted.
So I think now I do know what Iwant.
So that's what I'm looking for,which is extremely difficult
these days.
So I am ready.
Speaker 2 (00:58):
Do you have a long list of what you want?
Speaker 3 (01:01):
I don't.
I don't have a huge list.
Do you have it?
Speaker 2 (01:03):
written down somewhere.
I do actually.
Do you Really what you want?
Um, I don't, I don't have ahuge list, right?
Do you have it written?
Speaker 3 (01:04):
down somewhere.
I do actually do you?
Yeah, really I actually wroteit down one time.
Yeah, I don't remember where Iput it though.
Speaker 1 (01:12):
So you've never been close to getting married, you've
never been engaged you've neverhad that feeling of being with
a woman and thinking, oh, I wantto grow old with her.
Speaker 3 (01:18):
Um I think there was a point at one time I was
thinking about it, but it justnever evolved to that right.
So then it ended, and sincethen I've just no, never again
and how's your daughter?
She's seven and how.
Speaker 2 (01:34):
So I was gonna say how was that relationship?
Speaker 3 (01:36):
um, we're cordial you know, but I try to, like you
know, mom does her thing, I domy own thing, you know, and if
we need something serious orcome to a decision, then we
discuss it, but other than that,you just go live your life, I
live mine.
Speaker 1 (01:50):
How long were you with the mother for?
Speaker 3 (01:52):
Very short period of time, oh really, yeah.
So, um, I actually wanted tocontinue dating her and but she
didn't want to, and then she gotpregnant, and then I wanted it
again and she just said we'renever going to be together.
I said okay, and as soon as shesaid that I was just, I was
done.
It's time to move on.
Speaker 1 (02:13):
Wow, so was the pregnancy planned unplanned.
Speaker 3 (02:16):
It was unplanned.
Speaker 1 (02:16):
Unplanned.
Speaker 2 (02:18):
Do you?
Speaker 3 (02:19):
want more kids.
You know, people have asked methat and at my age it's kind of
like yes and no.
So if I'm with someone thatdoes yes, if I'm with someone
that doesn't no, I'm okay, youcan go either way.
Speaker 2 (02:29):
I can go either way yeah, Does your daughter want
siblings?
Oh my God, like crazy yeah.
Speaker 3 (02:33):
So I'll give you a little story right.
So on the mom's side, mydaughter has two cousins an aunt
, uncle and a grandma.
That's it Right On my side,cause I'm Portuguese right and
for people that don't know that,portuguese families you tend to
(02:53):
be really big.
So we go to my California toChristmas, you know, and my
uncle has a Christmas party andmy daughter walks up to me and
she goes dad, who here's mycousin.
I go everybody here is yourcousin except uncle and auntie,
that's it and she goes.
But there's like a hundredpeople here, cousin I go.
Everybody here is your cousinexcept uncle and auntie, that's
it and she goes.
But there's like a hundredpeople here I go.
I know there's a hundred cousindad, nobody, I have nothing
like that at my mom's house.
(03:13):
You know I'm a mom's side.
I go.
I know it's just a lot overthis way.
So, and she loves it.
Every time we go she's excited,she wants to go there, she
wants to hang out andeverybody's just cousin I go.
If you don't know their name,just call them cousin so do you
still have family back inPortugal?
um, yes, extended family,portugal.
So all my brothers and sisters,except for one sister, live in
California.
(03:33):
So I have a sister lives inVirginia, she's married to a JAG
officer, and then my mom'sthere.
My dad's no longer with us.
Um, she remember I'mried, buteverybody lives in California,
so I'm the only one who livesout here Nice, yeah, and so you
are very international.
Speaker 1 (03:50):
You've done a lot of traveling.
Tell us about that.
Speaker 3 (03:53):
Well, most of my traveling I did so back in
college I wanted to do well,I'll rewind.
First of all, I'm inagriculture, right, so people
don't know what that is.
Speaker 2 (04:02):
Sexiest industry in the world by the way, Woohoo
arriba, I grew up on a farm.
I can attest to that.
Speaker 3 (04:06):
Heck yeah because we have music, country music,
whatnot?
Speaker 1 (04:09):
So when you say you're in agriculture, what
exactly does that entail?
Speaker 3 (04:12):
You know, it's funny because for the longest time I
couldn't figure out how toexplain it to you.
And I pharmaceutical rep isright.
So I'm like a pharmaceuticalrep for farmers.
So there's a manufacturer Iwork for and then I go and talk
to farmers, you know, and sayhey, what do you need to take
care of your crop?
Now, do you guys remember and Idon't even know if they have
(04:35):
these anymore you remember theold supplement store called GNC?
Speaker 1 (04:38):
Yes.
Speaker 3 (04:39):
You know.
And then there's the vitaminshop right.
So they no longer have those.
Well, I can't find them.
I typed in the other dayvitamin shop because I was
looking for a particular vitamin.
It's like optimal.
Something pops up Anyhow.
I would be more like their rep,so I'm looking.
I'm trying to help farmers, youknow, be proactive in putting
proper nutrition in their cropsso that they have they don't
(05:00):
have to use pesticides or atleast a small amount of it,
right?
So that's what I pretty much do.
Speaker 1 (05:08):
Interesting.
How did you get into that?
Speaker 3 (05:10):
So first of all I grew up on a farm forever, and
then I got to farm for abouteight years for a guy, and then
one day he was just like I'mgoing to close the business, I'm
done.
And so I went looking for a joband I landed one in in sales
and and I was working inCalifornia for a company for a
little bit and then thisheadhunter called me and goes
(05:31):
hey, we're looking for someonethat could speak Portuguese and
Spanish to go to South America.
And I go, I'm in.
So I applied and that was that.
So then I traveled a lot anddown South America.
Speaker 1 (05:40):
Oh, nice yeah.
Speaker 3 (05:42):
But when I was in college I wanted to do weed
harvesting.
So in the US they call it the3,000-mile harvest.
They start in Texas to Canada.
But I was graduating later whenthey started.
So one guy goes why don't yougo to Australia?
They start in October.
So I was like all right, so Iwent to Australia.
And so when I got there it wasall Irish guys, one Palmy, which
(06:05):
is English Uh, I was the onlyAmerican and two Australians.
So for a week nobody would talkto me, you know, and I was just
like why?
And then later on they werelike well, we didn't talk to you
because we just thought youwere one of those pompous
Americans that we had to dealwith.
And then we find out you're not.
So it's kind of to americans, Ifeel have a little bit of a
negative reputation oh yeah ofbeing loud and obnoxious, and oh
(06:30):
yeah people always say you canalways spot the american on the
train because everyone can hearthem uh-huh for sure I think
americans sometimes go placesand they they feel like they can
do the same thing they do here,somewhere else, without you
know they don't adapt to othercultures they expect to
interject our culture, whateverour culture is, into other
countries.
Speaker 1 (06:49):
It's true because england everyone is quiet.
They keep to themselves whenyou're on the tube or the bus.
Same thing in japan and I thinkamericans go to these countries
and, kind of, you know,continue to be loud and right
everyone know what they'retalking about.
Speaker 3 (07:03):
Yeah, and I think it's also my my.
My feeling is I think they getin trouble.
They think, oh, you know thatsome somebody from the
government's going to come helpthem.
It doesn't really work out thatway.
You get in trouble their laws.
You just gotta deal with theirlaws now, right how do you like
australia it?
Speaker 1 (07:19):
was amazing yeah, a lot of fun, yeah I love it
because it's like England, butwith good weather, with the sun.
Speaker 3 (07:24):
So I did weed harvesting in the bush they call
it right.
Speaker 1 (07:28):
In the bush.
Speaker 3 (07:29):
It was basically that right.
Speaker 1 (07:31):
So I did that.
Speaker 3 (07:37):
And then it was a drought year, so we only got to
do it for about a month, alittle longer than a month, and
then we all kicked over toSydney and I found this little
place right right on CoogeeBeach.
So I found a place there then.
Speaker 2 (07:49):
I started, I was just gonna say Australia is just set
up for inappropriate right allday right, it's like it's.
Speaker 3 (07:55):
It's south of Bondi Beach where so everyone?
Knows Bondi Beach.
So anyways, um, I was there andI started.
I was working at a club as abar back then during the day,
bartender, and then I would doconstruction on the side.
You know, just to make endsmeet, cause I wanted to stay you
know, so I, just I wasconstantly just working, and
then I think, the last few weeksof being there, um, I just
(08:16):
traveled the country you know,and I'll tell you one thing, man
, australia is scary in someparts?
Yeah, because there's thingsthat eat you and kill you.
Lots of bugs and snakes there'slike certain places you go in
the water there's crocodiles,you know, and there's saltwater
crocodiles, you know.
Where I was, at Coogee Beach,they had this huge net, you know
, out in the ocean to keep thesharks from coming in right.
(08:38):
And then constantly there was aplane or helicopter would fly
by to watch and then all of asudden you hear a siren because
a shark jumped the net.
Speaker 2 (08:45):
Oh, my God.
Speaker 3 (08:45):
You know.
So then they had to send guysout there, find the shark, grab
it, put it back over, andeverybody would just get out of
the water, you know.
Speaker 1 (08:52):
I remember I was snorkeling at the Great Barrier
Reef in Australia and we weresurrounded by these reef sharks
and they weren't huge.
Speaker 3 (09:07):
They were like don't worry they're not gonna eat you.
Speaker 1 (09:08):
They're innocent.
Speaker 3 (09:09):
But they're still sharks, so I'm still like
freaking out, and that was fun.
I did that too.
That was a lot of beautiful.
Oh my god, it was great.
I went on a.
It was a sailing ship.
I went out and you just stayedout there the night for a couple
nights, you know, and then yougo um diving at night, and that
was that was amazing gorgeous ohthe, it was a full.
It was like you could.
You felt like you could touchit.
It was so big, it's cool, itwas so pretty.
Speaker 1 (09:27):
So you said that you would bartend there.
Speaker 3 (09:29):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (09:30):
Did you meet many Australian women?
How was that?
How were they?
Speaker 3 (09:32):
No, so I was bartending during the day, oh
gotcha.
You know it wasn't at know youwould see a lot of Australian
women.
It was different because theywould be pregnant women smoking
at the bar.
It was okay, savage.
You know and I was just like Inever saw that right.
I was like this is interesting.
(09:52):
As ever, the men were very muchlike you know, how did they
speak?
They would say something likeoi, oi, yeah, when they wanted
to talk to somebody, it wasn'tlike what's up or hey, how are
you, it was like oi, and it waslike we just grabbed someone's
attention and they were justwhat's going on?
You know, they want to talk toyou and um, it was.
It was just very interesting tosee so you never dated any
(10:15):
Aussie women.
I did actually I did date, youknow, um one of the girls that
worked there at the same clubthat I, that I worked at.
Yeah, we dated for a little bitwas she different than American
women or?
Um, yes, yeah, um, in one senseis she was constantly working
out, in a sense like in no, Iknow a lot of American women
(10:37):
work out, but hers was justswimming like we'd finish at
three o'clock in the morning.
She said I'm gonna go swim inthe ocean.
You know forever, let's go, allright, cool, I'm not going to,
you know like I'm going to bed,I'll see you back at our place,
you know, and uh, she'd show up,just you know, a couple hours
later soaking wet kind of thing,and I'm trying to think what
(10:58):
else would be different abouther.
I mean, the accent was great.
She was very like um, I want tosay like wanderlust, hippie-ish
kind of you know, which Iwasn't really into back then.
Speaker 1 (11:08):
Yeah, but, um, but, but overall she was just a very
nice person so we were talkingabout how, um, like Australia
owned by the commonwealth, andthat's where in the olden days,
the Brits would send theprisoners to Australia, but it's
so beautiful like I'd rather bein Australia than England.
And then he was telling me how,in Portugal, they have the same
thing.
Tell us about that.
Speaker 3 (11:27):
Oh yeah, so I think the Azor Islands was um was
where the Portuguese would send,you know, the prisoners to
those islands.
Speaker 1 (11:35):
But now it's a big tourist destination.
Speaker 3 (11:37):
It's become a huge tourist destination.
Yeah, people love going there.
The Europeans like going there,you going there, the europeans
like going there.
You know they buy houses, theywant to go there all the time
it's.
I remember going back in 92 andthere was still, you know,
horse and buggy kind of thingand now it's more paved.
Speaker 1 (11:54):
I haven't been back so I can't tell you everything,
but my cousins ago they tell methat it's more paved, there's
more cars, more people, etc kindof remember how in the olden
days they would serve lobster tothe slaves, because that was
like the bottom, and now it's soexpensive to eat lobsters.
Speaker 2 (12:06):
Yeah yeah, are you looking for someone that wants
to travel?
Speaker 1 (12:10):
with you a travel partner yeah, a travel.
Speaker 2 (12:12):
Have we talked about this before?
Speaker 1 (12:13):
like the travel bunny , like there's girls that are
literally looking for that, somelike looking for men that just
travel at it uh-huh, it's kindof like a gold digger, but they
just want to travel you pay, youpay their way and they'll be on
your arm he's like no thank younot that type of travel partner
?
Speaker 3 (12:31):
yeah, my travel buddy right now is my daughter yeah,
and I love that.
Oh yeah, yeah, I take herwherever I took her to to
portugal, spain, in in italylast year.
Speaker 1 (12:40):
We just had a blast she's a good traveler at that
easy super easy.
Speaker 3 (12:43):
Even when she was a baby, she was so super easy.
She didn't cry, didn't complainno she's like she'll just say,
hey, dad, when we're gonna getthere, and then say, oh, a
couple of hours or whatever, andshe's like okay I feel like if
you start taking kids whenthey're like young, young
they're just used to it.
Yes, yeah, yeah, but I meansome, some kids don't do that
great of a job.
I mean some kids just screaming, you know?
(13:05):
Okay, headphones.
Speaker 1 (13:07):
Yeah Right, I want some music.
So are you on the dating appscurrently?
Speaker 3 (13:11):
I'm not.
I got completely off of them.
I've done them all you know,and um, yeah, I don't know
what's going on.
Speaker 1 (13:25):
I was actually probably gonna ask you guys you
know what's up with this worldof dating, cause it's a sucks so
flat out.
Speaker 3 (13:28):
Have you had any bad dates from the app?
So disaster dates or catfish?
Um, I don't know if it was aquite a catfish, but I went out
with one woman once and sheasked me she goes, oh my God,
you look exactly like yourphotos.
I go, I'm supposed to right,you know that's the point.
That's the point of picturesshe's all she's like how about
me and I go?
No, no.
Speaker 1 (13:44):
You said that yeah.
Speaker 3 (13:45):
I go no, not even close.
She goes what.
I go no, and she's like what'sdifferent?
I go everything.
Speaker 1 (13:51):
That's hilarious.
How did she take that?
Speaker 3 (13:52):
She's just like well, it is me and I go.
Well, you can say that all dayyou want.
Were the pictures different?
Were they filtered?
Was she, you know, heavier?
Well, yeah, she was heavier.
They had heavily filtered.
Speaker 2 (14:09):
Right, you know, filters are terrible, so
terrible I feel that way, thoughI I'm not on the dating apps,
but I feel that way when we,when we talk to people that want
to come on the podcast, sothey'll reach out to us on
social media and go, hey, I wantto be a guest on your show, I'm
single, and it's like, okay,great, send us, you know, a
recent photo and and why youthink that you know you would
(14:29):
make a good guest.
And so they send photos, orthey send their social media and
we check them out and then wejump on the FaceTime with them
and it's like whoa, like Ithought we were talking to wait,
who are we talking to right now?
Speaker 1 (14:41):
and it's like oh, oh yeah, you're the same person.
Speaker 2 (14:43):
Like it's crazy.
Most of them don't look liketheir pictures.
The women especially.
Speaker 1 (14:48):
Which is weird to me, because I would be mortified to
show up on a date lookinguglier than my picture.
I don't want to disappointpeople, I'd rather have people
be pleasantly surprised.
Speaker 3 (14:58):
Yes, exactly right.
So picture and then be likelike I always get the same
question is like, are youactually six three?
And I'm like, yeah, I'm sixthree, because I guess a lot of
guys lie about it.
You know, they say they're sixfoot and show up they're five
foot you know kind of thing andwhen.
And I remember one day I went onand this girl, this she, she
(15:20):
purposely wore, like I want tosay, four inch heels because if
I was lying she wanted to towerover them.
Oh my God, which she did beforeshe told me I went on a date.
I completely towered over thisguy.
It made him so uncomfortableand I wanted to see if you were
lying.
She was, I want to say she was5'10" and then she put on
four-inch heels.
So I was like, yeah, why wouldI lie about that she?
You'd be surprised how manyguys lie.
(15:41):
But at the same time there's alot of women that lie too right
it goes, it goes both ways, bothways 100.
Speaker 1 (15:47):
So ladies, he's tall, he's six, three.
All the ladies that weinterview, that's their number
one criteria is I need a tallguy.
Speaker 2 (15:54):
He has they always say that yeah even if they're
like five two, they're short.
Speaker 3 (15:57):
I know it's not fair for us tall girls no, because
there's a lot of tall guys liketall girls.
Speaker 2 (16:03):
That is true.
It's just you have limitedright.
Speaker 1 (16:06):
Yeah, yeah yeah, the pool goes down, so have you been
in many relationships since youbroke up with your daughter's
mother no, actually I have noneno, no relationship.
Speaker 3 (16:16):
So I haven't, um, yeah, so I know relationships
and prior to that, um, I hadbeen probably on maybe two
relationships.
Speaker 1 (16:26):
Prior to that, yeah, and then, yeah, since my
ex-girlfriend yeah, it wasprobably about two so it that
seems surprising, because you'regood looking, you're tall,
you're successful, you're easyto talk to, you travel a lot
international.
So do you have a?
Do you think you have a fear ofcommitment?
Do you think or do you justfeel like you haven't found the
right one?
Speaker 3 (16:44):
so, um, I think, a couple things.
Number one, when I had agirlfriend, super, I was younger
, a lot younger, and, um, Ithink I was just immature and
just, you know, just a pompousass, because I was just dealing
with so much and I didn't knowhow to really work through it.
So I would be super moody allthe time, like constantly and,
(17:09):
um, so after I broke up with her, or she actually broke up with
me, after we broke up, I satback and I go, I need to just
work on myself.
I need to figure this out.
Why am I always moody?
And I just kept asking the samequestion why, when I got there
to a point to where I was like,okay, now I've figured it out,
whatever it was, and I gotbetter and better but took time
(17:29):
and I put a lot of work into itand I wanted to put that work in
it because, you know,eventually I'd want to get
married and I didn't want to bethis ass, you know, you know
husband, so, um, so I, I did allthat, you know, for years.
And um, which is funny now,because my daughter you know I
have how to put this, I have, Iguess you call it a standing
(17:51):
bitch face right Resting bitchface.
Speaker 2 (17:53):
That's what it is Resting.
I suffer from that too.
I have this serious.
Speaker 3 (17:59):
Look on my face and I'll be driving somewhere.
My daughter's like dad, are youin a bad mood?
I go, no, you know, and I getto like force a smile like Joel
Osteen right All day long.
You know, because she'swatching me and I go.
And it's funny because theother day she was with me and I
was just in a moody mood and Itold her I go, hey, dad's kind
(18:22):
of in a moody mood, I'm tryingto work through it, whatever.
And she catches on and she'sokay.
And she would ask me every, youknow, 20, 30 minutes.
Our daddy, you know when youmove, and I go, yeah, still
there, I'm just working throughit.
I go, hey, you know, some, let,we went for a bike ride.
(18:44):
I ran, I'd stop, do push-ups,she'd circle back.
She's like what are you doing?
What are you doing, you know?
So we knocked it out within,like you know, I don't know, 40
minutes or something like thatfelt super great.
And then I was just, you know,in a good mood.
And my daughter's like, oh,you're in such a great mood.
I go, yeah, when daddy worksout, if he feels a lot better.
You know so now.
So, so now what she does is dadyou in a bad mood?
The gym's right there.
I'm like now.
I'm not in a bad mood right nowso what are your hobbies?
Speaker 1 (19:06):
what do you do on your days off?
Speaker 3 (19:07):
so I don't really have any hobbies, but the things
I like to do especially is justtravel.
I love traveling.
I haven't done it's a hobby.
Speaker 2 (19:15):
I feel like you can qualify that as okay.
Speaker 3 (19:17):
So so then it is so.
I love traveling, so I did alot of, most of my traveling.
So I've been to almost 30countries, but I did most of it
on my own right, and now that Ihave my daughter, I just want to
take her everywhere, you know.
So I plan things to how do I,you know, when can I take her?
When are we going to dosomething?
You know kind of thing.
In my family I have asister-in-law that's really big
(19:40):
on traveling, so her and mybrother are constantly pushing
me Just take her here, take herthere, what not?
Speaker 2 (19:45):
So how do you find solo travel?
Because I love to solo traveland it's funny because people
tell me all the time they'relike I don't know.
I love it.
Speaker 3 (19:57):
I'm the same way.
I love it because when youtravel with a group, there's
people that always want to godifferent ways.
Right, and it's not as fun forme because this person pushes
that way, that one pushes thatway.
If we're all in sync, you knowwe're all going to do the same
thing.
Cool, whatever let's go.
But when you're solo travel,you just do whatever you want.
Speaker 2 (20:14):
When you want and you meet the best people.
I feel Like I have friends allover, because I travel by myself
and it forces you to just likemeet people.
Speaker 1 (20:24):
They say that traveling can make or break a
relationship.
Like you, have to be the sametype of traveler.
Oh, it's a huge deal breakerfor me.
Speaker 2 (20:30):
It's one of the reasons why I stayed with my ex
for so long, because it waspretty much the only thing we
were compatible.
Speaker 1 (20:37):
Let's always travel.
Speaker 2 (20:41):
It's a basis and that is that kind of is what we did.
We traveled all like weprobably traveled once a month.
I would say we had a trip atleast every month, but it was
like it literally when it got tothe end of the relationship.
It was like it literally wasthe only thing that was
compatible between us at thatpoint.
Speaker 1 (20:56):
I've traveled with people when we're on vacation
and they said they want to be upearly at 7 am and for me, when
you're on vacation, youshouldn't set your alarm, you
know, or people that want toplan everything out At 12
o'clock.
We're doing this 1 o'clock too,like for me.
I'm like no, let's just go withthe flow.
Speaker 3 (21:09):
I'm the same way.
Speaker 2 (21:20):
And so wherever there's water, let's go.
Someone cares swimming pool,ocean lake, that's it.
That's how I am I need to be.
Speaker 3 (21:22):
I need to be by water .
Yeah, there's a lot of peoplethat want to go like I don't get
really impressed by, like thebuildings.
You know, I like the history, Ilike knowing a little bit about
it.
But like, I went to machupicchu, right, and I went all
the way to top.
Go to this.
You know the ruins.
It's great and whatnot.
I was there maybe 30 minutes.
People spend all day.
What are you doing here?
You know, this thing is so tiny, it's not massive like they see
(21:43):
on photos.
I'm like check it out, look atit.
Speaker 2 (21:46):
You make your way back to this, the town, the town
has more exciting things now,you know I felt that way about
the grand canyon the first timeI ever went there.
You like drive up to it andyou're like, okay, cool there it
is right, you know, I just like, I like to see it.
Speaker 3 (22:00):
And then also, you know, it's more the expression
on my daughter's face, like whenshe sees something but she's
right now she doesn't care about.
I mean, we saw the coliseum.
She's like okay, whatever, youknow, let's get back on, let's
go back on the ship, you know,and go to the pool.
That's what she cares about.
Yeah, you know that, knowthat's, and that, to me, is fun.
Speaker 1 (22:18):
Are you ready for it?
Are you ready for it?
Speaker 2 (22:22):
It gets more extreme every time, but I am ready.
Gotta switch it up.
The Keep More Minute brought toyou by Tactical Tax Strategies.
They help you keep more in yourwallet.
We help you keep more in yourrelationship.
Our question this week um, I'verecently started dating someone
amazing, funny, kind,emotionally mature, a unicorn,
(22:45):
basically.
The catch he has aseven-year-old son.
I've never been a parent andnow I'm suddenly googling things
like how to bond over Legos anddo kids know when you're
nervous?
I care about them both, but I'mterrified of messing this up.
How do I step into this newrole without stepping on toes or
, worse, stepping out too soon?
Speaker 1 (23:05):
That's funny because when I met my husband, he had a
three-year-old Grayson and I hadzero experience with kids.
Speaker 2 (23:11):
I remember this, I never changed a diaper.
Speaker 1 (23:13):
I never babysat, I did not know how to be around
kids, but you know what?
It was great.
It was very natural.
I just gave him attention,played with him, spent time with
him and it worked out great andhe loved me.
He was always asking when's LaLindsay?
He called me La Lindsay.
When's La Lindsay coming over?
So I feel you just have to benatural, don't try too hard
maybe, and just give themattention and time.
Speaker 3 (23:38):
Play with time, played with them.
What do you think?
I agree, 100 and all that,that's all it is.
Just be yourself, you know, andyou're gonna fumble.
But who cares?
They don't care, it's true, youknow what's your opinion on
introducing your daughter?
Speaker 2 (23:44):
how soon?
Well, I guess you haven'treally dated much, so you
probably haven't run into thislike oh I don't introduce my
daughter to anybody no period.
Speaker 3 (23:50):
Like I remember going on a date um with this woman.
I think I went the second timewith her and she just flat out
said she goes, I don't evenbelieve you have a daughter.
And I'm like okay, why wouldyou?
Speaker 2 (24:00):
lie about that.
Speaker 3 (24:02):
And she's like you never showed me a picture.
I go, yeah, good luck on meshowing you one now.
And she was just like reallyYou're not going to show me.
No, I don't post my daughteranywhere, nobody knows what she
looks like.
And just I'm that guy, I'm veryprivate and quiet about it and
you know, she was just very likeyou need to show me, kind of
thing.
And I'm like, no, I've hadanother woman.
One time I was talking to heron the phone.
(24:24):
She goes how much time do youspend with your daughter?
I go I have your 50 of the time.
She goes that's too much.
And I'm like, no, not for me,it's not yeah I go for you.
It might be but okay 50 is toomuch yeah
Speaker 2 (24:36):
that's funny, kids are funny.
My niece is eight and we werein Dallas for Easter last
weekend and we were in the carand she looks at me and out of
nowhere, she's like you know,she's like there's, there's
going to be a man that likes yousomeday.
And I was like.
I was like thanks, natalie.
Thank you very much.
(24:56):
Like little do you know?
There there are plenty.
Like just because I'm notintroducing you to men every
time I come home doesn't meanthat they're not out there.
But I was just like oh my god.
Speaker 1 (25:08):
That's what I love about kids is they'll say
anything, they don't care thisone little kiddie before was
like Yeezy, you used to beskinny.
What happened to you?
You used to be skinny, nowyou're no you.
You used to be skinny, nowyou're no longer skinny.
What happened?
That's funny, thank you.
Christmas and Thanksgiving iswhat happened.
Speaker 3 (25:24):
Yeah.
So my daughter, like I'll giveher a kiss and she'll rub it off
, she goes I'm dad, I'm rubbingit off, I go, you know, dad's
going to go find a girlfriendthat keeps them.
Speaker 1 (25:39):
She's like oh, give me a kiss, now it in.
I'm rubbing it in.
That's funny.
Start laughing all the time.
It's funny, you know.
So now we're going to discussan article.
Why do relationships fail?
So why do you guys thinkrelationships fail?
So they're all pretty, prettyobvious communication.
Speaker 2 (25:48):
I feel like that's one of the big one loss of trust
.
Speaker 1 (25:51):
One of the foundational feelings necessary
in a good relationship is afeeling of security.
If you lack emotional supportor find your partner unreliable,
you might lose trust, andrelationships that are built on
missed trust are on shakygrounds, I agree.
I feel like once you lose trust, it's over pretty much yeah,
but I feel like people nowadaysgo into relationships without
(26:12):
trust.
Speaker 2 (26:13):
Why would you do that because they bring their
baggage from their oldrelationships into their new
relationships.
Speaker 3 (26:18):
they do, my God, yes, they do, and so they like
you're not.
Speaker 2 (26:21):
you're not given the initial trust that should come
with being in a new relationship, because people bring their old
stuff in.
So I feel like a lot ofrelationships start without
trust and so then how do theyeven, how do you even work
through that?
Speaker 1 (26:36):
That's one of my pet peeves when people use their
past against you because theirex cheated on them.
They assume that you're goingto cheat on them, and that's not
fair, yeah.
Speaker 3 (26:44):
No, it's not.
So I'll give you guys a couplestories.
So a couple of years back, Iwas listening to a podcast and
there was a financial advisor onthere and he was talking you
know finances, and the one guygoes.
Oh, you know, the main reasonpeople get divorced is because
of money.
He goes wrong.
That's not it, it'scommunication.
It's just a lack ofcommunication.
People don't talk to each other, they don't spend time with
(27:06):
each other whatnot?
So, um, and then when I was incollege, I was taking this, um,
this health class and the theprofessor, you know, he comes up
and he goes.
You know something?
My wife and I have the best sexalways.
We've been married 30 years.
I was like, well, that'sintriguing, how's that possible?
And he goes.
(27:27):
The reason why is because Itell her exactly what I like,
she tells me what, exactly whatshe likes, and I I sat back and
thought about that.
It's like that's pretty simple.
You're just saying what you likeyou know so, and then I'm like
why don't people just take thatwith everything right, like
literally everything?
Like if you look at kids right,they just tell you what they
like I'm hungry, you know I gotto go to the bathroom.
They just like you just saidyou know about, you know your
(27:51):
was it.
I don't know if it was yourniece or your nephew, you know.
So it was kind of like whycan't people do that?
The problem, I found out, ispeople have the hardest time
receiving it Right.
So if you're going to bebrutally honest, you got to be
ready to take it because itmight come as a punch.
Speaker 2 (28:08):
It's funny because it was yeah, my niece again back
to her one of the things sheused to say when she was little.
If she didn't like something,she'd go don't like it, grandma,
don't like it, grandma.
She would say it to my mom,don't like it, grandma.
My grandma, my mom, my grandma,my mom would make dinner or
whatever, and they'd be watchingher and she'd they'd put it on
her plate.
She go, don't like it, grandma.
So now we say that it's funny,cause we'll say that, like, if
she makes something that's notgood or or about anything, we'll
(28:31):
just be like don't like it,grandma.
Speaker 3 (28:34):
That's funny.
Speaker 1 (28:35):
So another one is lying.
Lies can have powerfulconsequences and have far
reaching effects on arelationship and can drive it
into the ground.
Speaker 3 (28:42):
Filters.
Speaker 2 (28:43):
Filters is a lie, right when people put them up,
it's so true they are a lie yeahso you should always take a
girl swimming on the first dateyeah, that's true.
Speaker 1 (28:52):
See if her eyebrows come off.
Possessiveness if you're with apartner who is overly
possessive, ask yourself doesthis seem healthy?
Does your partner isolate you,away from your friends or
constantly check up on you?
These are signs of someone who.
These aren't signs of someonewho trusts you.
Remind yourself that this isnot what a healthy relationship
(29:12):
is all about.
I do feel like, um, beingpossessiveness is.
Don't you think that's a dealbreaker?
Speaker 2 (29:19):
but isn't that also we talked in a couple of our
previous episodes about, likenarcissism and narcissistic
personality disorder, and I feellike that, that sort that
isolation, isolation of theperson from their friends and
family?
Don't you have friends female?
Speaker 1 (29:33):
friends that once they get into a relationship,
they drop off the face of theearth like you never see them
anymore because their boyfriendswon't let them go out with
their girlfriends.
Yeah, I dated a guy once thatwas extremely possessive and I
graduated college and hewouldn't let me go to any
graduation parties and I'm like,looking back, I'm like what the
bloody hell was I thinking Likewhy didn't?
Speaker 3 (29:52):
I just go to that dang graduation party.
I was graduating college, youknow.
Well, I also think too is likeum, people's friends have a huge
influence on you know, ifyou're going to keep a
relationship, you know, or keeppushing forward, Like you know,
I always tell my friends, whenthey call me up and they want to
talk about, you know, eithergirlfriends or their wives,
right, when they begin, I go I'mon her team.
(30:13):
You know, whatever you're goingto tell me, I'm on her team.
And they're like, really, and Igo, yeah, unless it's like
something bizarre, you know, Ibet you it's going to be
something.
That's not that big of a deal,right?
Because even with your ownfriend, if you have them
supporting your marriage to keepit going, well, there's an
avenue to vent, right, To talkabout whatever you want.
But hey, maybe they're seeingsomething different that you're
(30:35):
not doing correctly in yourrelationship, right?
Speaker 1 (30:37):
Right.
You know, what I find verysurprising is I see a lot of
videos on TikTok of women goingout out like mom's night out or
wife's night out, and there areso many comments from men and
women that are saying that thisis inappropriate, that women
should not be going out with thegirls when they're married or
when they're in a relationship.
Do you agree with that?
(30:58):
And some women have thatmentality too, like that's not
okay to go out for a night outlike once in a while I don't
know.
Speaker 2 (31:06):
I don't think it's a big deal.
It's not right.
Speaker 3 (31:08):
I mean, if you're going all the time, then yeah,
if you're going out all the time, if you go like if you're going
once in a while, I don't see abig deal about that at all, I
think that's great.
It's good for you, right?
Speaker 2 (31:15):
yeah, yeah, I mean the guys do it and especially
like if you're going to dinneryou're going to get some drinks
or something like that.
It's not like you're going outto the club and then going to an
after party until 4am, likethat's one thing.
Speaker 3 (31:27):
You know what I?
Speaker 2 (31:27):
mean.
Like if it's like dinner anddrinks or whatever.
I don't think it's that big ofa deal.
Speaker 3 (31:32):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (31:32):
Jealousy.
So jealousy in small doses canbe healthy and a sign that
you're not taking one anotherfor granted.
But if someone is overlypossessive and seems to exhibit
signs of pathological jealousy,these are red flags.
I hate jealousy.
There's, I feel, like a lot ofpeople are jealous nowadays,
don't you agree?
Speaker 2 (31:49):
yeah, well, because people are jealous of fictional
characters on social media oh mygod, right because like nobody
is who they really are you know?
So they're jealous over theseinstagram models who aren't
really real, and they're jealousover these, like you know,
athlete type guys that aren'treally real, and they're jealous
over these, like you know,athlete type guys that aren't
really real.
And so it's like there's thiswhole sense of altered reality
(32:12):
that we live in.
Speaker 3 (32:13):
And all platforms have the same people.
Speaker 2 (32:14):
Yes, all the time Right?
Speaker 1 (32:16):
Yes, you know so.
I hate.
So I've dated jazz men in thepast and they make you feel like
you're doing something wrongwhen you're not, you know,
because they're always givingyou crap.
Like you'll be talking to amale co-worker about work and
you're like, oh my god, am Idoing something wrong?
I just I hate that feeling ofinsecurity and always having to
worry if you're gonna piss offyour boyfriend.
Like, remember that time I wasdating a very jealous guy at the
(32:37):
time and we went to the W andmet those football players and I
did nothing wrong.
I mean, we were just having agood time, had some funny
stories with these footballplayers and I told him on the
way home.
I called him because I'm anopen book, I did nothing wrong
and he got so mad at me and youknow what he said.
He said my ex-girlfriend wouldhave absolutely never done that.
I'm like, what did I do?
(32:58):
We were sitting me and my girlwas sitting by the pool and
happened to interact with thesefootball players.
Big deal, like I made out withthem, yeah, but he made me feel
so guilty, like I was such a badgirlfriend and I betrayed him
anyways.
Speaker 3 (33:10):
So I think I think people my age the one thing too,
like if you're looking to beserious in a relationship just a
lot of people have never dealtwith their baggage like you were
talking about.
You know something about theirex.
I've.
You know endless dates wherewomen just bring up their, their
ex-husband, their ex-boyfriend.
I'm like this you have to dealwith this because it's not going
to go anywhere.
(33:31):
You know, I don't want, I'm notbringing anything.
I'm, I'm done with everything.
Like okay, I'm clean, let's go,let's figure this out, let's
build something together, right,whatever that is, let's build
it, you know.
And now that I have a daughter,I'm just very particular because
it's like I'm not going to be arevolving door at all.
My daughter doesn't knowanybody.
You know, now I havegirlfriends of mine that you
(33:53):
know.
Every once in a while she seesand, okay, big deal, but we're
not making out, we're notnothing, it's just we're friends
, that's it.
But I just think a lot ofpeople just don't take that time
to just get those things takencare of.
Now I will go back a little bit.
You were talking about like,have I ever gone on a crazy date
?
So you guys tell me if this iscrazy.
Speaker 2 (34:12):
I'm not sure if it is or not no-transcript place.
Speaker 3 (34:34):
So I come walking in right and they had this wall of
just pictures all over the place, you know people, and right in
the middle of that wall is apicture of me.
What, what, yeah, she had, andit's not just like she printed
it on a piece of paper.
She had taken the file and shetold me that she's like like I
don't know if you guys have aCVS or a Walgreens and printed
it on like, yeah, like a glossypiece of paper framed it, put it
(34:58):
right on the wall.
Speaker 1 (34:59):
Was this a joke?
Speaker 3 (35:00):
No, no, no, she was dead serious.
She goes.
These are all my friends andyou're my friend no, and I'm
thinking in my head.
Silence of the lambs.
Speaker 2 (35:06):
There's a dungeon down here yeah I if it was a
joke it would be one thing likeif it was a joke it is.
It is kind of a funny joke likethat's something my husband
would have done as a joke.
Speaker 1 (35:16):
That's what I'm.
That was, that was our.
Speaker 3 (35:17):
That was our first date right I like I came to
visit her and I was just like,yeah, so here's.
The other thing too.
Is so I fall asleep, or try tofall asleep on the couch, right,
I'm like sleeping with one eyeopen, I go, I'm gonna get
drugged you're wearing your skinin the morning exactly right,
you know, rub the lotion on theskin.
Super freaky.
Anyhow I wake up, you know,just think of a doorframe, right
(35:40):
, you know, and she is likepeeking through, like with one
eye, you know oh my god right atme the whole time and I wake up
and I'm like, hey, what's goingon?
And she's like man justwatching you sleep, just you
know, just keeps me peace, orsomething she said this yes, it
was something odd.
It was like, oh, you're sobeautiful watching you sleep and
I was just like, well, I am me,so we're good.
(36:01):
But at the same time I was justlike, oh my God, here's the
cool thing about it was my phone.
The alarm went off, right, andI pretended it was a phone call,
so I turned off the alarm.
I was like hello, and I made itlike this whole dramatic thing,
like, oh my God, I got to getback.
You know, something happened.
She's like okay, we'll keep intouch.
Speaker 2 (36:22):
Hell no, yeah, that's a special kind of crazy.
That's like crazy crazy.
That's like that's likelegitimately, like certifiably
crazy.
Yeah Was she great?
Speaker 1 (36:32):
other than those comments, was she normal?
Speaker 3 (36:35):
No, no.
So later on I found out allthese lies about she, came clean
about all these lies aboutherself and I was just like holy
crap, really, where do youthink this is gonna go?
You know, in life, you know, ifwe were to be something, you
know, come on now.
Yeah, why I don't.
That's the part I don't get,why people just can't be.
You know.
You know themselves right likeauthentic right, you know one of
(36:55):
the biggest accomplishments youcould have in your life is just
being your authentic self.
You know, whatever that mightbe, yeah, it's true.
Speaker 1 (37:01):
so to finish off that is infidelity, of course I feel
like once.
Yeah, it's true.
So to finish off thisinfidelity, of course I feel
like once you cheat, it's hardto go back.
Communication, and what's funnyis they say that you know a lot
of people brag about neverarguing in their relationship,
which that's not normal.
Did you see?
George Clooney in his lastinterview was like Amal and I
have never had an argument.
We always try to find somethingto fight about.
Speaker 2 (37:29):
Is that normal?
I feel like there's alwaysgoing to be conflict in a
marriage and they've beentogether years.
They have kids.
There's always conflict, butthey might not have like knock
down drag out whatever you callit argument.
Maybe they're just mature,maybe they're just mature and
when they have conflict aboutstuff they just like talk about
it and work through it.
So it is conflict and it isdiffering opinions, but they're
not toxic about it and fightingabout it.
Speaker 1 (37:47):
I could see that I don't know.
And then lack of respect is oneyou have to respect each other
and not talk down to each otheror roll your eyes at each other.
And if your partner mocks you,sneers or is hostile, it's a
sign of disgust.
But why would you ever be withsomeone that is disrespectful
towards you?
Speaker 3 (38:03):
Or why would you be with someone that is
disrespectful towards you, orwhy would you be with someone
that you don't respect?
Goes to her point.
People are just jumping intothe relationship and getting
married for no reason.
Speaker 2 (38:10):
Right, well, and then like to like resting bitch face
, I roll my eyes like it's likenothing and I mean no disrespect
by it, like so it's, some ofthat stuff is like kind of you
got to take it a little bit witha grain of salt, but um, yeah,
no, respect is big, I thinkquickly a difference in
priorities.
Speaker 1 (38:29):
You know, someone might just want a casual
relationship, no stringsattached, whereas the other one
is ready to introduce them toher family.
Speaker 2 (38:36):
Um, but that's communication too, though,
because if you're yeah, yeah, ifyou're not looking for a
serious relationship, I feellike you need to say that,
because a lot of people go intodates or go into dating
situations and they're nothonest about that.
It's true, you know they actlike they want a relationship
when they really are not lookingfor that.
Speaker 1 (38:56):
I feel like you need to put it out there in the
beginning what you're lookingfor and what you want.
So, the next one.
Different life goals can end arelationship.
I know someone that was adamantabout saving for retirement,
like all the money they put intowas going to retirement.
His partner had the mentalityyou could die tomorrow.
I don't want to save money forretirement because you might not
get to retire, so she wasspending it all.
That didn't work out.
(39:16):
Same thing with kids.
A guy I knew didn't want kids,had a vasectomy, was upfront.
It met this girl.
She thought she could changehis mind.
They got married.
Then she asked him for areversal and he's like nope,
they got divorced again.
I think you really need to beupfront about you know what?
Speaker 3 (39:32):
you want.
So going back to the you knowpeople saving for retirement
that podcast I was telling youabout, that I was listening to
the financial advisor said yeah,the husband didn't do anything,
just save, save, saved.
He retired the day, the nextday he died.
And the wife comes in is likeyou know.
And he had a couple milliondollars saved and the wife comes
in.
She's like now what?
And I had all these years totravel and see the world.
(39:54):
My husband, the man that I lovemore than anything.
Now I have all this money to godo what.
You know, I don't have no oneto go travel with.
So you're right, you know, youwant to experience the things as
you go along.
Now, yeah, you know yeah soit's true.
Speaker 1 (40:06):
The last one is sex and intimacy.
That can break a relationship.
Speaker 3 (40:09):
If someone's super sexual and someone's not really,
then it can end therelationship so there's a book
called 101 questions to askbefore you get engaged and you
know, in my understanding fromthe book it's like the really
hard questions.
I think everyone should justread that book.
It's like the really hardquestions.
I think everyone should justread that book.
It's like it's going to answera lot of that, but yeah and um,
(40:32):
um.
I think people should read itand see if they are a match,
instead of just jumping in andjust like, okay, I'm gonna get
married safe time right.
Speaker 2 (40:39):
Start bringing it to your first date and be like
we're gonna start on page one.
They're so funny.
Speaker 3 (40:43):
There was a guy that brought it on his second date,
oh really, and he ended upmarrying his wife and they've
been married forever oh my god,he brought a second date and she
goes perfect they went downevery list of the things oh, how
funny.
Speaker 1 (40:54):
So now it's time for the celebrity cut, where we
marinate in the juices of thecelebrity.
So you know who I have madrespect for.
Now, after seeing her interviewon call her daddy podcast,
chloe kardashian, I haven'treally had a positive opinion on
the kardashians.
I don't know how I feel aboutkim or kendall or kylie, but I
love chloe kardashian.
Now do you know much about her?
Did you see that interview?
Like she's so nice and kind andwell-spoken and smart and real
(41:19):
and authentic.
And then she was saying how shewent to a therapist after the
whole cheating scandal and thetherapist released all of her
docs to the press.
Oh, seriously yes, which is ahuge HIPAA violation right, yeah
, but the host was like did yousue?
And she's like no, that's justnot me.
You know what am I going togain out of it?
I don't need money and that'sjust gonna, you know, rehash all
(41:40):
the trauma.
And then she went to get IVFwith her ex-husband and the
doctor's office released herrecords again for a second time
which again huge violation, butagain she didn't sue.
Wow, she just.
I don't know.
I was very impressed with her.
I.
She's someone I could totallybe friends with.
She seems fun and I love howChris, her mother, lives right
(42:00):
next door to her and she likespies on her and she'll call
Chloe.
Be like where are you going,huh?
Whose whose car is that?
Who's over?
That's funny.
I wish I lived close to my momlike that not me.
Speaker 3 (42:11):
No, really, heck.
No, be my business all the time.
Speaker 1 (42:14):
There's no way to want that so where's your
favorite place to go on a firstdate?
Speaker 3 (42:20):
um, I like speakeasies.
Oh yeah, you know they have.
Um, they're kind of dark.
You know you're trying tofigure out where the wall is to
go through and then you open upand it's like this really nice
place to check out which is yourfavorite one in town?
So I've been to a few um.
I've been to a couple ingilbert, you know because I live
out that way, and then I'vebeen to one in chandler, a
couple in um in uh, scottsdale,but so far the one I liked was
(42:45):
the one in Gilbert.
Speaker 1 (42:45):
Is that the White Rabbit?
Yeah, I've heard of that.
Speaker 3 (42:48):
You have to have a password.
They email you once a month.
There's a new one.
That it's like a plane ticket.
You know the old-fashionedCarry on.
Speaker 1 (42:58):
Yes the old-fashioned ?
Yeah, I've heard of that one Iwant to go, but they're always
full up.
You have to like wait in lineonline to get a spot.
Speaker 3 (43:05):
So they send it to you every Monday, like you get
it every Monday, and then youjust got to get on right away,
right, have you been to the oneat Rennan Wolf downtown?
No, I've heard about it though.
Yeah, I like that one thatone's my favorite, yeah, oh.
Speaker 2 (43:20):
I like that and it's like a hunting cabin inside Is
that the one with the Roosevelt.
Speaker 3 (43:25):
There's one with like Roosevelt on a wall, or maybe
that one's called the Roosevelt.
Speaker 2 (43:29):
I don't know that one .
Yeah, I don't know, but it's,the inside is all like dark and
leather and like it's like acabin.
It's cool.
Speaker 3 (43:39):
Because there's also one that's like a disco club,
you know you go in.
And there was another one Icame across because you know
those influencers that are onsocial media.
You know they post a lot aboutit.
There was one that the entireroom, or the whole place, was
all red.
You know everything was red.
And I was just like ooh, that'spretty bitchin', yeah, you know
.
Speaker 1 (43:59):
So I have a question for you Are you down for the
challenge?
Up for?
Speaker 3 (44:02):
the grab Depends on the challenge challenge willing
to share.
Speaker 1 (44:04):
Pick one, if you dare .
Hopefully it's a juicy one,because the last episode wasn't
so juicy, I needed my fix weneed a spicy question this week.
Speaker 3 (44:15):
Paulo, let's go oh, this one just says um, do you
have a hidden talent?
Speaker 1 (44:20):
oh, do you have a hidden talent?
Speaker 3 (44:22):
I don't think I do really.
I think the only thing that Idon't know, if it's hidden
people that tend to tell methings that are just that I
don't think they would tellanybody else.
Like we'll be hanging out andjust say something random and
I'm like, really, you're goingto tell me this right now.
(44:42):
I'll give you an example.
So I went out with this, thiswoman, and we're shooting the
breeze and she's telling meabout how she went hunting in
Africa, right, and I'm like withher ex-husband now, right,
she's telling me about it.
And in that conversation shetalks, you know, brings in you
know the word.
She says the word strip club.
And I'm like, what, what doesthat have to do with hunting,
you know, in Africa, you know?
So I asked her to go.
You know, you brought up stripclub.
Was that means?
Oh, it's just.
(45:02):
When my husband and I weretogether we used to swing, you
know, and she started going intodetail about how she would go
to this house and whatnot.
And you know, she'd hook upwith, you know, four, five, six
dudes, you know, and whatnot.
In the middle of our date, herphone starts, you know, chiming,
and she's like, oh it's, youknow, it's just no worry about
(45:24):
this.
It's my booty call.
You know he calls me so I canjust go there.
Oh my god, on the date, talkabout being transparent, right?
I'm like oh my god, that's sosexy, can we just hang?
Speaker 1 (45:34):
out again.
No, I'm never gonna hang outwith you.
I love how you're sostraightforward we're never
gonna hang out again.
Speaker 3 (45:41):
Are you high?
Seriously?
First of all, you want to tellme about you, you know.
You want to tell me about allthis weenie you're taking on,
you know.
You know on a daily basis.
Now you got some dude textingyou so you can leave here and go
get some more.
Oh my God, there's nothing,dude, we're never doing anything
.
Speaker 2 (45:58):
At least she weeded herself out early, though.
Oh my God.
Speaker 3 (46:00):
But it's like, it's like stuff like that People
would just.
Speaker 1 (46:03):
How did she take it when you said, no, we're not
going to see each other again?
Speaker 3 (46:06):
She was like okay.
Speaker 2 (46:08):
Because she's obviously got a roster.
She's got a roster, you know.
Speaker 3 (46:12):
It's just insane.
Like you know, I went onanother date and you know I
asked the lady I goes hey, whatdo you do for a living?
Because I didn't know.
Speaker 2 (46:34):
And she's like okay, cool, maybe you go ballet or
something.
No, I'm a stripper.
I'm like, I'm like, well, it'sso funny because I just saw a
clip from another podcast andthey were talking about this
because they were, they werearguing.
I think the one of the guestson was a stripper and the guy,
the male host, was like, likewhy do you call it dancing?
Because you, essentially, youare stripping.
You don't have to dance upthere.
Like you really don't have todance, you can just stand up
(46:57):
there, walk back and forth, takeyour clothes off, and it's
stripping.
Like, let's call it what it is.
Yeah, some of them do dance andthere are some really good
dancers.
I've been to some strip clubswith amazing dancers, don't get
me wrong.
There are dancers, but it'slike, essentially, if you're
just walking back and forthtaking your clothes off, you're
not really a dancer, you're justa stripper, right?
Speaker 3 (47:19):
And I've had women I'll go on a date Um, even,
sometimes even just leading upto it, not even going on a date,
and they're just asking youknow, hey, can you pay for my
rent?
Hey, you know I can't afford.
You know, food for my kids?
Hey, I can't have money for gas.
I'm like, does this look a ATMto you?
Speaker 2 (47:35):
You know I've been on .
I've been on a date where theguy asked me to help him pay his
rent, so that that goes bothways Paolo men do it too Well,
I'm not on that side, right, I'mon this side, so I only hear
you know you know what they have
Speaker 3 (47:47):
to say but it's just, it's just bizarre.
You know how people are just soblunt with me on certain things
.
It's like damn.
And then I asked friends ofmine they go, I've never heard,
they'd ever hear anything,nothing, bizarre.
Speaker 2 (47:58):
It's nice though, because it's sort of it, does it
like it?
The trash takes itself out.
Then at that point, right, youknow what I mean.
Speaker 3 (48:05):
I get that, but it's just it's just funny how people
just open up, you know and um,and I thought, okay, maybe it's
just like a date thing, right,people open up.
No, I.
I meet random people.
They just want to open up andjust want to talk about whatever
, and I'm like God, it'sseriously right now.
Yeah, you know, so it's justfunny.
Speaker 2 (48:22):
I bet you wish all the hot ladies would open up she
had to put something spicy in,because the question was so
vanilla.
Speaker 1 (48:30):
I did have to tell you the question was yeah I did
have a joke that I wanted totell when we were talking about
australia.
I forgot to sneak it in, soI'll sneak it in now.
What is the difference betweena french kiss and an australian
kiss?
An australian kiss is the samething as a french kiss, but it's
down under.
Do you have any other questions?
No, do you have any other itemsyou want to share?
Speaker 3 (48:51):
No, I don't think so right now.
Speaker 1 (48:52):
Well, thank you so much for joining us this week at
the Meat Market.
Thank you so much, paolo, forbeing here.
If you want to go on a datewith our 6'3 Paolo, send us a DM
at Meat Market Podcast.
And thank you so much to oursponsor, tactical Tax Strategies
.
If you want to save money andkeep more in your wallet, go to
Tactical Tax Strategies.
Thank you so much and we'll seeyou next week at the meat
(49:13):
market.
Oh my God, I just totally gotcatfished.
He looks absolutely nothinglike his picture.
Speaker 2 (49:20):
So I found out, the guy that I've been dating is
married with kids.
His wife just reached out to me.
Oh my god, I just totally got catfished.
He looks absolutely nothinglike his picture.
Speaker 2 (00:06):
So I found out, the guy that I've been dating is
married with kids.
His wife just reached out to me.
Speaker 1 (00:15):
Welcome to the meat market.
The single scene is aslaughterhouse and we are here
to devour it.
We are your hosts.
I'm Lindsay, I'm Jess andtoday's sizzling single is Paolo
.
Welcome.
Thanks for coming here.
Speaker 3 (00:30):
Thank you for having me.
Speaker 1 (00:30):
So you have never been married, but now you feel
like you're ready and you wantit.
So why are you ready now?
What changed?
Speaker 3 (00:39):
I don't know.
I think just just over time.
And you know, having a daughterand knowing what I want, Before
, when I was younger, I didn'tknow really what I wanted.
So I think now I do know what Iwant.
So that's what I'm looking for,which is extremely difficult
these days.
So I am ready.
Speaker 2 (00:58):
Do you have a long list of what you want?
Speaker 3 (01:01):
I don't.
I don't have a huge list.
Do you have it?
Speaker 2 (01:03):
written down somewhere.
I do actually.
Do you Really what you want?
Um, I don't, I don't have ahuge list, right?
Do you have it written?
Speaker 3 (01:04):
down somewhere.
I do actually do you?
Yeah, really I actually wroteit down one time.
Yeah, I don't remember where Iput it though.
Speaker 1 (01:12):
So you've never been close to getting married, you've
never been engaged you've neverhad that feeling of being with
a woman and thinking, oh, I wantto grow old with her.
Speaker 3 (01:18):
Um I think there was a point at one time I was
thinking about it, but it justnever evolved to that right.
So then it ended, and sincethen I've just no, never again
and how's your daughter?
She's seven and how.
Speaker 2 (01:34):
So I was gonna say how was that relationship?
Speaker 3 (01:36):
um, we're cordial you know, but I try to, like you
know, mom does her thing, I domy own thing, you know, and if
we need something serious orcome to a decision, then we
discuss it, but other than that,you just go live your life, I
live mine.
Speaker 1 (01:50):
How long were you with the mother for?
Speaker 3 (01:52):
Very short period of time, oh really, yeah.
So, um, I actually wanted tocontinue dating her and but she
didn't want to, and then she gotpregnant, and then I wanted it
again and she just said we'renever going to be together.
I said okay, and as soon as shesaid that I was just, I was
done.
It's time to move on.
Speaker 1 (02:13):
Wow, so was the pregnancy planned unplanned.
Speaker 3 (02:16):
It was unplanned.
Speaker 1 (02:16):
Unplanned.
Speaker 2 (02:18):
Do you?
Speaker 3 (02:19):
want more kids.
You know, people have asked methat and at my age it's kind of
like yes and no.
So if I'm with someone thatdoes yes, if I'm with someone
that doesn't no, I'm okay, youcan go either way.
Speaker 2 (02:29):
I can go either way yeah, Does your daughter want
siblings?
Oh my God, like crazy yeah.
Speaker 3 (02:33):
So I'll give you a little story right.
So on the mom's side, mydaughter has two cousins an aunt
, uncle and a grandma.
That's it Right On my side,cause I'm Portuguese right and
for people that don't know that,portuguese families you tend to
(02:53):
be really big.
So we go to my California toChristmas, you know, and my
uncle has a Christmas party andmy daughter walks up to me and
she goes dad, who here's mycousin.
I go everybody here is yourcousin except uncle and auntie,
that's it and she goes.
But there's like a hundredpeople here, cousin I go.
Everybody here is your cousinexcept uncle and auntie, that's
it and she goes.
But there's like a hundredpeople here I go.
I know there's a hundred cousindad, nobody, I have nothing
like that at my mom's house.
(03:13):
You know I'm a mom's side.
I go.
I know it's just a lot overthis way.
So, and she loves it.
Every time we go she's excited,she wants to go there, she
wants to hang out andeverybody's just cousin I go.
If you don't know their name,just call them cousin so do you
still have family back inPortugal?
um, yes, extended family,portugal.
So all my brothers and sisters,except for one sister, live in
California.
(03:33):
So I have a sister lives inVirginia, she's married to a JAG
officer, and then my mom'sthere.
My dad's no longer with us.
Um, she remember I'mried, buteverybody lives in California,
so I'm the only one who livesout here Nice, yeah, and so you
are very international.
Speaker 1 (03:50):
You've done a lot of traveling.
Tell us about that.
Speaker 3 (03:53):
Well, most of my traveling I did so back in
college I wanted to do well,I'll rewind.
First of all, I'm inagriculture, right, so people
don't know what that is.
Speaker 2 (04:02):
Sexiest industry in the world by the way, Woohoo
arriba, I grew up on a farm.
I can attest to that.
Speaker 3 (04:06):
Heck yeah because we have music, country music,
whatnot?
Speaker 1 (04:09):
So when you say you're in agriculture, what
exactly does that entail?
Speaker 3 (04:12):
You know, it's funny because for the longest time I
couldn't figure out how toexplain it to you.
And I pharmaceutical rep isright.
So I'm like a pharmaceuticalrep for farmers.
So there's a manufacturer Iwork for and then I go and talk
to farmers, you know, and sayhey, what do you need to take
care of your crop?
Now, do you guys remember and Idon't even know if they have
(04:35):
these anymore you remember theold supplement store called GNC?
Speaker 1 (04:38):
Yes.
Speaker 3 (04:39):
You know.
And then there's the vitaminshop right.
So they no longer have those.
Well, I can't find them.
I typed in the other dayvitamin shop because I was
looking for a particular vitamin.
It's like optimal.
Something pops up Anyhow.
I would be more like their rep,so I'm looking.
I'm trying to help farmers, youknow, be proactive in putting
proper nutrition in their cropsso that they have they don't
(05:00):
have to use pesticides or atleast a small amount of it,
right?
So that's what I pretty much do.
Speaker 1 (05:08):
Interesting.
How did you get into that?
Speaker 3 (05:10):
So first of all I grew up on a farm forever, and
then I got to farm for abouteight years for a guy, and then
one day he was just like I'mgoing to close the business, I'm
done.
And so I went looking for a joband I landed one in in sales
and and I was working inCalifornia for a company for a
little bit and then thisheadhunter called me and goes
(05:31):
hey, we're looking for someonethat could speak Portuguese and
Spanish to go to South America.
And I go, I'm in.
So I applied and that was that.
So then I traveled a lot anddown South America.
Speaker 1 (05:40):
Oh, nice yeah.
Speaker 3 (05:42):
But when I was in college I wanted to do weed
harvesting.
So in the US they call it the3,000-mile harvest.
They start in Texas to Canada.
But I was graduating later whenthey started.
So one guy goes why don't yougo to Australia?
They start in October.
So I was like all right, so Iwent to Australia.
And so when I got there it wasall Irish guys, one Palmy, which
(06:05):
is English Uh, I was the onlyAmerican and two Australians.
So for a week nobody would talkto me, you know, and I was just
like why?
And then later on they werelike well, we didn't talk to you
because we just thought youwere one of those pompous
Americans that we had to dealwith.
And then we find out you're not.
So it's kind of to americans, Ifeel have a little bit of a
negative reputation oh yeah ofbeing loud and obnoxious, and oh
(06:30):
yeah people always say you canalways spot the american on the
train because everyone can hearthem uh-huh for sure I think
americans sometimes go placesand they they feel like they can
do the same thing they do here,somewhere else, without you
know they don't adapt to othercultures they expect to
interject our culture, whateverour culture is, into other
countries.
Speaker 1 (06:49):
It's true because england everyone is quiet.
They keep to themselves whenyou're on the tube or the bus.
Same thing in japan and I thinkamericans go to these countries
and, kind of, you know,continue to be loud and right
everyone know what they'retalking about.
Speaker 3 (07:03):
Yeah, and I think it's also my my.
My feeling is I think they getin trouble.
They think, oh, you know thatsome somebody from the
government's going to come helpthem.
It doesn't really work out thatway.
You get in trouble their laws.
You just gotta deal with theirlaws now, right how do you like
australia it?
Speaker 1 (07:19):
was amazing yeah, a lot of fun, yeah I love it
because it's like England, butwith good weather, with the sun.
Speaker 3 (07:24):
So I did weed harvesting in the bush they call
it right.
Speaker 1 (07:28):
In the bush.
Speaker 3 (07:29):
It was basically that right.
Speaker 1 (07:31):
So I did that.
Speaker 3 (07:37):
And then it was a drought year, so we only got to
do it for about a month, alittle longer than a month, and
then we all kicked over toSydney and I found this little
place right right on CoogeeBeach.
So I found a place there then.
Speaker 2 (07:49):
I started, I was just gonna say Australia is just set
up for inappropriate right allday right, it's like it's.
Speaker 3 (07:55):
It's south of Bondi Beach where so everyone?
Knows Bondi Beach.
So anyways, um, I was there andI started.
I was working at a club as abar back then during the day,
bartender, and then I would doconstruction on the side.
You know, just to make endsmeet, cause I wanted to stay you
know, so I, just I wasconstantly just working, and
then I think, the last few weeksof being there, um, I just
(08:16):
traveled the country you know,and I'll tell you one thing, man
, australia is scary in someparts?
Yeah, because there's thingsthat eat you and kill you.
Lots of bugs and snakes there'slike certain places you go in
the water there's crocodiles,you know, and there's saltwater
crocodiles, you know.
Where I was, at Coogee Beach,they had this huge net, you know
, out in the ocean to keep thesharks from coming in right.
(08:38):
And then constantly there was aplane or helicopter would fly
by to watch and then all of asudden you hear a siren because
a shark jumped the net.
Speaker 2 (08:45):
Oh, my God.
Speaker 3 (08:45):
You know.
So then they had to send guysout there, find the shark, grab
it, put it back over, andeverybody would just get out of
the water, you know.
Speaker 1 (08:52):
I remember I was snorkeling at the Great Barrier
Reef in Australia and we weresurrounded by these reef sharks
and they weren't huge.
Speaker 3 (09:07):
They were like don't worry they're not gonna eat you.
Speaker 1 (09:08):
They're innocent.
Speaker 3 (09:09):
But they're still sharks, so I'm still like
freaking out, and that was fun.
I did that too.
That was a lot of beautiful.
Oh my god, it was great.
I went on a.
It was a sailing ship.
I went out and you just stayedout there the night for a couple
nights, you know, and then yougo um diving at night, and that
was that was amazing gorgeous ohthe, it was a full.
It was like you could.
You felt like you could touchit.
It was so big, it's cool, itwas so pretty.
Speaker 1 (09:27):
So you said that you would bartend there.
Speaker 3 (09:29):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (09:30):
Did you meet many Australian women?
How was that?
How were they?
Speaker 3 (09:32):
No, so I was bartending during the day, oh
gotcha.
You know it wasn't at know youwould see a lot of Australian
women.
It was different because theywould be pregnant women smoking
at the bar.
It was okay, savage.
You know and I was just like Inever saw that right.
I was like this is interesting.
(09:52):
As ever, the men were very muchlike you know, how did they
speak?
They would say something likeoi, oi, yeah, when they wanted
to talk to somebody, it wasn'tlike what's up or hey, how are
you, it was like oi, and it waslike we just grabbed someone's
attention and they were justwhat's going on?
You know, they want to talk toyou and um, it was.
It was just very interesting tosee so you never dated any
(10:15):
Aussie women.
I did actually I did date, youknow, um one of the girls that
worked there at the same clubthat I, that I worked at.
Yeah, we dated for a little bitwas she different than American
women or?
Um, yes, yeah, um, in one senseis she was constantly working
out, in a sense like in no, Iknow a lot of American women
(10:37):
work out, but hers was justswimming like we'd finish at
three o'clock in the morning.
She said I'm gonna go swim inthe ocean.
You know forever, let's go, allright, cool, I'm not going to,
you know like I'm going to bed,I'll see you back at our place,
you know, and uh, she'd show up,just you know, a couple hours
later soaking wet kind of thing,and I'm trying to think what
(10:58):
else would be different abouther.
I mean, the accent was great.
She was very like um, I want tosay like wanderlust, hippie-ish
kind of you know, which Iwasn't really into back then.
Speaker 1 (11:08):
Yeah, but, um, but, but overall she was just a very
nice person so we were talkingabout how, um, like Australia
owned by the commonwealth, andthat's where in the olden days,
the Brits would send theprisoners to Australia, but it's
so beautiful like I'd rather bein Australia than England.
And then he was telling me how,in Portugal, they have the same
thing.
Tell us about that.
Speaker 3 (11:27):
Oh yeah, so I think the Azor Islands was um was
where the Portuguese would send,you know, the prisoners to
those islands.
Speaker 1 (11:35):
But now it's a big tourist destination.
Speaker 3 (11:37):
It's become a huge tourist destination.
Yeah, people love going there.
The Europeans like going there,you going there, the europeans
like going there.
You know they buy houses, theywant to go there all the time
it's.
I remember going back in 92 andthere was still, you know,
horse and buggy kind of thingand now it's more paved.
Speaker 1 (11:54):
I haven't been back so I can't tell you everything,
but my cousins ago they tell methat it's more paved, there's
more cars, more people, etc kindof remember how in the olden
days they would serve lobster tothe slaves, because that was
like the bottom, and now it's soexpensive to eat lobsters.
Speaker 2 (12:06):
Yeah yeah, are you looking for someone that wants
to travel?
Speaker 1 (12:10):
with you a travel partner yeah, a travel.
Speaker 2 (12:12):
Have we talked about this before?
Speaker 1 (12:13):
like the travel bunny , like there's girls that are
literally looking for that, somelike looking for men that just
travel at it uh-huh, it's kindof like a gold digger, but they
just want to travel you pay, youpay their way and they'll be on
your arm he's like no thank younot that type of travel partner
?
Speaker 3 (12:31):
yeah, my travel buddy right now is my daughter yeah,
and I love that.
Oh yeah, yeah, I take herwherever I took her to to
portugal, spain, in in italylast year.
Speaker 1 (12:40):
We just had a blast she's a good traveler at that
easy super easy.
Speaker 3 (12:43):
Even when she was a baby, she was so super easy.
She didn't cry, didn't complainno she's like she'll just say,
hey, dad, when we're gonna getthere, and then say, oh, a
couple of hours or whatever, andshe's like okay I feel like if
you start taking kids whenthey're like young, young
they're just used to it.
Yes, yeah, yeah, but I meansome, some kids don't do that
great of a job.
I mean some kids just screaming, you know?
(13:05):
Okay, headphones.
Speaker 1 (13:07):
Yeah Right, I want some music.
So are you on the dating appscurrently?
Speaker 3 (13:11):
I'm not.
I got completely off of them.
I've done them all you know,and um, yeah, I don't know
what's going on.
Speaker 1 (13:25):
I was actually probably gonna ask you guys you
know what's up with this worldof dating, cause it's a sucks so
flat out.
Speaker 3 (13:28):
Have you had any bad dates from the app?
So disaster dates or catfish?
Um, I don't know if it was aquite a catfish, but I went out
with one woman once and sheasked me she goes, oh my God,
you look exactly like yourphotos.
I go, I'm supposed to right,you know that's the point.
That's the point of picturesshe's all she's like how about
me and I go?
No, no.
Speaker 1 (13:44):
You said that yeah.
Speaker 3 (13:45):
I go no, not even close.
She goes what.
I go no, and she's like what'sdifferent?
I go everything.
Speaker 1 (13:51):
That's hilarious.
How did she take that?
Speaker 3 (13:52):
She's just like well, it is me and I go.
Well, you can say that all dayyou want.
Were the pictures different?
Were they filtered?
Was she, you know, heavier?
Well, yeah, she was heavier.
They had heavily filtered.
Speaker 2 (14:09):
Right, you know, filters are terrible, so
terrible I feel that way, thoughI I'm not on the dating apps,
but I feel that way when we,when we talk to people that want
to come on the podcast, sothey'll reach out to us on
social media and go, hey, I wantto be a guest on your show, I'm
single, and it's like, okay,great, send us, you know, a
recent photo and and why youthink that you know you would
(14:29):
make a good guest.
And so they send photos, orthey send their social media and
we check them out and then wejump on the FaceTime with them
and it's like whoa, like Ithought we were talking to wait,
who are we talking to right now?
Speaker 1 (14:41):
and it's like oh, oh yeah, you're the same person.
Speaker 2 (14:43):
Like it's crazy.
Most of them don't look liketheir pictures.
The women especially.
Speaker 1 (14:48):
Which is weird to me, because I would be mortified to
show up on a date lookinguglier than my picture.
I don't want to disappointpeople, I'd rather have people
be pleasantly surprised.
Speaker 3 (14:58):
Yes, exactly right.
So picture and then be likelike I always get the same
question is like, are youactually six three?
And I'm like, yeah, I'm sixthree, because I guess a lot of
guys lie about it.
You know, they say they're sixfoot and show up they're five
foot you know kind of thing andwhen.
And I remember one day I went onand this girl, this she, she
(15:20):
purposely wore, like I want tosay, four inch heels because if
I was lying she wanted to towerover them.
Oh my God, which she did beforeshe told me I went on a date.
I completely towered over thisguy.
It made him so uncomfortableand I wanted to see if you were
lying.
She was, I want to say she was5'10" and then she put on
four-inch heels.
So I was like, yeah, why wouldI lie about that she?
You'd be surprised how manyguys lie.
(15:41):
But at the same time there's alot of women that lie too right
it goes, it goes both ways, bothways 100.
Speaker 1 (15:47):
So ladies, he's tall, he's six, three.
All the ladies that weinterview, that's their number
one criteria is I need a tallguy.
Speaker 2 (15:54):
He has they always say that yeah even if they're
like five two, they're short.
Speaker 3 (15:57):
I know it's not fair for us tall girls no, because
there's a lot of tall guys liketall girls.
Speaker 2 (16:03):
That is true.
It's just you have limitedright.
Speaker 1 (16:06):
Yeah, yeah yeah, the pool goes down, so have you been
in many relationships since youbroke up with your daughter's
mother no, actually I have noneno, no relationship.
Speaker 3 (16:16):
So I haven't, um, yeah, so I know relationships
and prior to that, um, I hadbeen probably on maybe two
relationships.
Speaker 1 (16:26):
Prior to that, yeah, and then, yeah, since my
ex-girlfriend yeah, it wasprobably about two so it that
seems surprising, because you'regood looking, you're tall,
you're successful, you're easyto talk to, you travel a lot
international.
So do you have a?
Do you think you have a fear ofcommitment?
Do you think or do you justfeel like you haven't found the
right one?
Speaker 3 (16:44):
so, um, I think, a couple things.
Number one, when I had agirlfriend, super, I was younger
, a lot younger, and, um, Ithink I was just immature and
just, you know, just a pompousass, because I was just dealing
with so much and I didn't knowhow to really work through it.
So I would be super moody allthe time, like constantly and,
(17:09):
um, so after I broke up with her, or she actually broke up with
me, after we broke up, I satback and I go, I need to just
work on myself.
I need to figure this out.
Why am I always moody?
And I just kept asking the samequestion why, when I got there
to a point to where I was like,okay, now I've figured it out,
whatever it was, and I gotbetter and better but took time
(17:29):
and I put a lot of work into itand I wanted to put that work in
it because, you know,eventually I'd want to get
married and I didn't want to bethis ass, you know, you know
husband, so, um, so I, I did allthat, you know, for years.
And um, which is funny now,because my daughter you know I
have how to put this, I have, Iguess you call it a standing
(17:51):
bitch face right Resting bitchface.
Speaker 2 (17:53):
That's what it is Resting.
I suffer from that too.
I have this serious.
Speaker 3 (17:59):
Look on my face and I'll be driving somewhere.
My daughter's like dad, are youin a bad mood?
I go, no, you know, and I getto like force a smile like Joel
Osteen right All day long.
You know, because she'swatching me and I go.
And it's funny because theother day she was with me and I
was just in a moody mood and Itold her I go, hey, dad's kind
(18:22):
of in a moody mood, I'm tryingto work through it, whatever.
And she catches on and she'sokay.
And she would ask me every, youknow, 20, 30 minutes.
Our daddy, you know when youmove, and I go, yeah, still
there, I'm just working throughit.
I go, hey, you know, some, let,we went for a bike ride.
(18:44):
I ran, I'd stop, do push-ups,she'd circle back.
She's like what are you doing?
What are you doing, you know?
So we knocked it out within,like you know, I don't know, 40
minutes or something like thatfelt super great.
And then I was just, you know,in a good mood.
And my daughter's like, oh,you're in such a great mood.
I go, yeah, when daddy worksout, if he feels a lot better.
You know so now.
So, so now what she does is dadyou in a bad mood?
The gym's right there.
I'm like now.
I'm not in a bad mood right nowso what are your hobbies?
Speaker 1 (19:06):
what do you do on your days off?
Speaker 3 (19:07):
so I don't really have any hobbies, but the things
I like to do especially is justtravel.
I love traveling.
I haven't done it's a hobby.
Speaker 2 (19:15):
I feel like you can qualify that as okay.
Speaker 3 (19:17):
So so then it is so.
I love traveling, so I did alot of, most of my traveling.
So I've been to almost 30countries, but I did most of it
on my own right, and now that Ihave my daughter, I just want to
take her everywhere, you know.
So I plan things to how do I,you know, when can I take her?
When are we going to dosomething?
You know kind of thing.
In my family I have asister-in-law that's really big
(19:40):
on traveling, so her and mybrother are constantly pushing
me Just take her here, take herthere, what not?
Speaker 2 (19:45):
So how do you find solo travel?
Because I love to solo traveland it's funny because people
tell me all the time they'relike I don't know.
I love it.
Speaker 3 (19:57):
I'm the same way.
I love it because when youtravel with a group, there's
people that always want to godifferent ways.
Right, and it's not as fun forme because this person pushes
that way, that one pushes thatway.
If we're all in sync, you knowwe're all going to do the same
thing.
Cool, whatever let's go.
But when you're solo travel,you just do whatever you want.
Speaker 2 (20:14):
When you want and you meet the best people.
I feel Like I have friends allover, because I travel by myself
and it forces you to just likemeet people.
Speaker 1 (20:24):
They say that traveling can make or break a
relationship.
Like you, have to be the sametype of traveler.
Oh, it's a huge deal breakerfor me.
Speaker 2 (20:30):
It's one of the reasons why I stayed with my ex
for so long, because it waspretty much the only thing we
were compatible.
Speaker 1 (20:37):
Let's always travel.
Speaker 2 (20:41):
It's a basis and that is that kind of is what we did.
We traveled all like weprobably traveled once a month.
I would say we had a trip atleast every month, but it was
like it literally when it got tothe end of the relationship.
It was like it literally wasthe only thing that was
compatible between us at thatpoint.
Speaker 1 (20:56):
I've traveled with people when we're on vacation
and they said they want to be upearly at 7 am and for me, when
you're on vacation, youshouldn't set your alarm, you
know, or people that want toplan everything out At 12
o'clock.
We're doing this 1 o'clock too,like for me.
I'm like no, let's just go withthe flow.
Speaker 3 (21:09):
I'm the same way.
Speaker 2 (21:20):
And so wherever there's water, let's go.
Someone cares swimming pool,ocean lake, that's it.
That's how I am I need to be.
Speaker 3 (21:22):
I need to be by water .
Yeah, there's a lot of peoplethat want to go like I don't get
really impressed by, like thebuildings.
You know, I like the history, Ilike knowing a little bit about
it.
But like, I went to machupicchu, right, and I went all
the way to top.
Go to this.
You know the ruins.
It's great and whatnot.
I was there maybe 30 minutes.
People spend all day.
What are you doing here?
You know, this thing is so tiny, it's not massive like they see
(21:43):
on photos.
I'm like check it out, look atit.
Speaker 2 (21:46):
You make your way back to this, the town, the town
has more exciting things now,you know I felt that way about
the grand canyon the first timeI ever went there.
You like drive up to it andyou're like, okay, cool there it
is right, you know, I just like, I like to see it.
Speaker 3 (22:00):
And then also, you know, it's more the expression
on my daughter's face, like whenshe sees something but she's
right now she doesn't care about.
I mean, we saw the coliseum.
She's like okay, whatever, youknow, let's get back on, let's
go back on the ship, you know,and go to the pool.
That's what she cares about.
Yeah, you know that, knowthat's, and that, to me, is fun.
Speaker 1 (22:18):
Are you ready for it?
Are you ready for it?
Speaker 2 (22:22):
It gets more extreme every time, but I am ready.
Gotta switch it up.
The Keep More Minute brought toyou by Tactical Tax Strategies.
They help you keep more in yourwallet.
We help you keep more in yourrelationship.
Our question this week um, I'verecently started dating someone
amazing, funny, kind,emotionally mature, a unicorn,
(22:45):
basically.
The catch he has aseven-year-old son.
I've never been a parent andnow I'm suddenly googling things
like how to bond over Legos anddo kids know when you're
nervous?
I care about them both, but I'mterrified of messing this up.
How do I step into this newrole without stepping on toes or
, worse, stepping out too soon?
Speaker 1 (23:05):
That's funny because when I met my husband, he had a
three-year-old Grayson and I hadzero experience with kids.
Speaker 2 (23:11):
I remember this, I never changed a diaper.
Speaker 1 (23:13):
I never babysat, I did not know how to be around
kids, but you know what?
It was great.
It was very natural.
I just gave him attention,played with him, spent time with
him and it worked out great andhe loved me.
He was always asking when's LaLindsay?
He called me La Lindsay.
When's La Lindsay coming over?
So I feel you just have to benatural, don't try too hard
maybe, and just give themattention and time.
Speaker 3 (23:38):
Play with time, played with them.
What do you think?
I agree, 100 and all that,that's all it is.
Just be yourself, you know, andyou're gonna fumble.
But who cares?
They don't care, it's true, youknow what's your opinion on
introducing your daughter?
Speaker 2 (23:44):
how soon?
Well, I guess you haven'treally dated much, so you
probably haven't run into thislike oh I don't introduce my
daughter to anybody no period.
Speaker 3 (23:50):
Like I remember going on a date um with this woman.
I think I went the second timewith her and she just flat out
said she goes, I don't evenbelieve you have a daughter.
And I'm like okay, why wouldyou?
Speaker 2 (24:00):
lie about that.
Speaker 3 (24:02):
And she's like you never showed me a picture.
I go, yeah, good luck on meshowing you one now.
And she was just like reallyYou're not going to show me.
No, I don't post my daughteranywhere, nobody knows what she
looks like.
And just I'm that guy, I'm veryprivate and quiet about it and
you know, she was just very likeyou need to show me, kind of
thing.
And I'm like, no, I've hadanother woman.
One time I was talking to heron the phone.
(24:24):
She goes how much time do youspend with your daughter?
I go I have your 50 of the time.
She goes that's too much.
And I'm like, no, not for me,it's not yeah I go for you.
It might be but okay 50 is toomuch yeah
Speaker 2 (24:36):
that's funny, kids are funny.
My niece is eight and we werein Dallas for Easter last
weekend and we were in the carand she looks at me and out of
nowhere, she's like you know,she's like there's, there's
going to be a man that likes yousomeday.
And I was like.
I was like thanks, natalie.
Thank you very much.
(24:56):
Like little do you know?
There there are plenty.
Like just because I'm notintroducing you to men every
time I come home doesn't meanthat they're not out there.
But I was just like oh my god.
Speaker 1 (25:08):
That's what I love about kids is they'll say
anything, they don't care thisone little kiddie before was
like Yeezy, you used to beskinny.
What happened to you?
You used to be skinny, nowyou're no you.
You used to be skinny, nowyou're no longer skinny.
What happened?
That's funny, thank you.
Christmas and Thanksgiving iswhat happened.
Speaker 3 (25:24):
Yeah.
So my daughter, like I'll giveher a kiss and she'll rub it off
, she goes I'm dad, I'm rubbingit off, I go, you know, dad's
going to go find a girlfriendthat keeps them.
Speaker 1 (25:39):
She's like oh, give me a kiss, now it in.
I'm rubbing it in.
That's funny.
Start laughing all the time.
It's funny, you know.
So now we're going to discussan article.
Why do relationships fail?
So why do you guys thinkrelationships fail?
So they're all pretty, prettyobvious communication.
Speaker 2 (25:48):
I feel like that's one of the big one loss of trust
.
Speaker 1 (25:51):
One of the foundational feelings necessary
in a good relationship is afeeling of security.
If you lack emotional supportor find your partner unreliable,
you might lose trust, andrelationships that are built on
missed trust are on shakygrounds, I agree.
I feel like once you lose trust, it's over pretty much yeah,
but I feel like people nowadaysgo into relationships without
(26:12):
trust.
Speaker 2 (26:13):
Why would you do that because they bring their
baggage from their oldrelationships into their new
relationships.
Speaker 3 (26:18):
they do, my God, yes, they do, and so they like
you're not.
Speaker 2 (26:21):
you're not given the initial trust that should come
with being in a new relationship, because people bring their old
stuff in.
So I feel like a lot ofrelationships start without
trust and so then how do theyeven, how do you even work
through that?
Speaker 1 (26:36):
That's one of my pet peeves when people use their
past against you because theirex cheated on them.
They assume that you're goingto cheat on them, and that's not
fair, yeah.
Speaker 3 (26:44):
No, it's not.
So I'll give you guys a couplestories.
So a couple of years back, Iwas listening to a podcast and
there was a financial advisor onthere and he was talking you
know finances, and the one guygoes.
Oh, you know, the main reasonpeople get divorced is because
of money.
He goes wrong.
That's not it, it'scommunication.
It's just a lack ofcommunication.
People don't talk to each other, they don't spend time with
(27:06):
each other whatnot?
So, um, and then when I was incollege, I was taking this, um,
this health class and the theprofessor, you know, he comes up
and he goes.
You know something?
My wife and I have the best sexalways.
We've been married 30 years.
I was like, well, that'sintriguing, how's that possible?
And he goes.
(27:27):
The reason why is because Itell her exactly what I like,
she tells me what, exactly whatshe likes, and I I sat back and
thought about that.
It's like that's pretty simple.
You're just saying what you likeyou know so, and then I'm like
why don't people just take thatwith everything right, like
literally everything?
Like if you look at kids right,they just tell you what they
like I'm hungry, you know I gotto go to the bathroom.
They just like you just saidyou know about, you know your
(27:51):
was it.
I don't know if it was yourniece or your nephew, you know.
So it was kind of like whycan't people do that?
The problem, I found out, ispeople have the hardest time
receiving it Right.
So if you're going to bebrutally honest, you got to be
ready to take it because itmight come as a punch.
Speaker 2 (28:08):
It's funny because it was yeah, my niece again back
to her one of the things sheused to say when she was little.
If she didn't like something,she'd go don't like it, grandma,
don't like it, grandma.
She would say it to my mom,don't like it, grandma.
My grandma, my mom, my grandma,my mom would make dinner or
whatever, and they'd be watchingher and she'd they'd put it on
her plate.
She go, don't like it, grandma.
So now we say that it's funny,cause we'll say that, like, if
she makes something that's notgood or or about anything, we'll
(28:31):
just be like don't like it,grandma.
Speaker 3 (28:34):
That's funny.
Speaker 1 (28:35):
So another one is lying.
Lies can have powerfulconsequences and have far
reaching effects on arelationship and can drive it
into the ground.
Speaker 3 (28:42):
Filters.
Speaker 2 (28:43):
Filters is a lie, right when people put them up,
it's so true they are a lie yeahso you should always take a
girl swimming on the first dateyeah, that's true.
Speaker 1 (28:52):
See if her eyebrows come off.
Possessiveness if you're with apartner who is overly
possessive, ask yourself doesthis seem healthy?
Does your partner isolate you,away from your friends or
constantly check up on you?
These are signs of someone who.
These aren't signs of someonewho trusts you.
Remind yourself that this isnot what a healthy relationship
(29:12):
is all about.
I do feel like, um, beingpossessiveness is.
Don't you think that's a dealbreaker?
Speaker 2 (29:19):
but isn't that also we talked in a couple of our
previous episodes about, likenarcissism and narcissistic
personality disorder, and I feellike that, that sort that
isolation, isolation of theperson from their friends and
family?
Don't you have friends female?
Speaker 1 (29:33):
friends that once they get into a relationship,
they drop off the face of theearth like you never see them
anymore because their boyfriendswon't let them go out with
their girlfriends.
Yeah, I dated a guy once thatwas extremely possessive and I
graduated college and hewouldn't let me go to any
graduation parties and I'm like,looking back, I'm like what the
bloody hell was I thinking Likewhy didn't?
Speaker 3 (29:52):
I just go to that dang graduation party.
I was graduating college, youknow.
Well, I also think too is likeum, people's friends have a huge
influence on you know, ifyou're going to keep a
relationship, you know, or keeppushing forward, Like you know,
I always tell my friends, whenthey call me up and they want to
talk about, you know, eithergirlfriends or their wives,
right, when they begin, I go I'mon her team.
(30:13):
You know, whatever you're goingto tell me, I'm on her team.
And they're like, really, and Igo, yeah, unless it's like
something bizarre, you know, Ibet you it's going to be
something.
That's not that big of a deal,right?
Because even with your ownfriend, if you have them
supporting your marriage to keepit going, well, there's an
avenue to vent, right, To talkabout whatever you want.
But hey, maybe they're seeingsomething different that you're
(30:35):
not doing correctly in yourrelationship, right?
Speaker 1 (30:37):
Right.
You know, what I find verysurprising is I see a lot of
videos on TikTok of women goingout out like mom's night out or
wife's night out, and there areso many comments from men and
women that are saying that thisis inappropriate, that women
should not be going out with thegirls when they're married or
when they're in a relationship.
Do you agree with that?
(30:58):
And some women have thatmentality too, like that's not
okay to go out for a night outlike once in a while I don't
know.
Speaker 2 (31:06):
I don't think it's a big deal.
It's not right.
Speaker 3 (31:08):
I mean, if you're going all the time, then yeah,
if you're going out all the time, if you go like if you're going
once in a while, I don't see abig deal about that at all, I
think that's great.
It's good for you, right?
Speaker 2 (31:15):
yeah, yeah, I mean the guys do it and especially
like if you're going to dinneryou're going to get some drinks
or something like that.
It's not like you're going outto the club and then going to an
after party until 4am, likethat's one thing.
Speaker 3 (31:27):
You know what I?
Speaker 2 (31:27):
mean.
Like if it's like dinner anddrinks or whatever.
I don't think it's that big ofa deal.
Speaker 3 (31:32):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (31:32):
Jealousy.
So jealousy in small doses canbe healthy and a sign that
you're not taking one anotherfor granted.
But if someone is overlypossessive and seems to exhibit
signs of pathological jealousy,these are red flags.
I hate jealousy.
There's, I feel, like a lot ofpeople are jealous nowadays,
don't you agree?
Speaker 2 (31:49):
yeah, well, because people are jealous of fictional
characters on social media oh mygod, right because like nobody
is who they really are you know?
So they're jealous over theseinstagram models who aren't
really real, and they're jealousover these, like you know,
athlete type guys that aren'treally real, and they're jealous
over these, like you know,athlete type guys that aren't
really real.
And so it's like there's thiswhole sense of altered reality
(32:12):
that we live in.
Speaker 3 (32:13):
And all platforms have the same people.
Speaker 2 (32:14):
Yes, all the time Right?
Speaker 1 (32:16):
Yes, you know so.
I hate.
So I've dated jazz men in thepast and they make you feel like
you're doing something wrongwhen you're not, you know,
because they're always givingyou crap.
Like you'll be talking to amale co-worker about work and
you're like, oh my god, am Idoing something wrong?
I just I hate that feeling ofinsecurity and always having to
worry if you're gonna piss offyour boyfriend.
Like, remember that time I wasdating a very jealous guy at the
(32:37):
time and we went to the W andmet those football players and I
did nothing wrong.
I mean, we were just having agood time, had some funny
stories with these footballplayers and I told him on the
way home.
I called him because I'm anopen book, I did nothing wrong
and he got so mad at me and youknow what he said.
He said my ex-girlfriend wouldhave absolutely never done that.
I'm like, what did I do?
(32:58):
We were sitting me and my girlwas sitting by the pool and
happened to interact with thesefootball players.
Big deal, like I made out withthem, yeah, but he made me feel
so guilty, like I was such a badgirlfriend and I betrayed him
anyways.
Speaker 3 (33:10):
So I think I think people my age the one thing too,
like if you're looking to beserious in a relationship just a
lot of people have never dealtwith their baggage like you were
talking about.
You know something about theirex.
I've.
You know endless dates wherewomen just bring up their, their
ex-husband, their ex-boyfriend.
I'm like this you have to dealwith this because it's not going
to go anywhere.
(33:31):
You know, I don't want, I'm notbringing anything.
I'm, I'm done with everything.
Like okay, I'm clean, let's go,let's figure this out, let's
build something together, right,whatever that is, let's build
it, you know.
And now that I have a daughter,I'm just very particular because
it's like I'm not going to be arevolving door at all.
My daughter doesn't knowanybody.
You know, now I havegirlfriends of mine that you
(33:53):
know.
Every once in a while she seesand, okay, big deal, but we're
not making out, we're notnothing, it's just we're friends
, that's it.
But I just think a lot ofpeople just don't take that time
to just get those things takencare of.
Now I will go back a little bit.
You were talking about like,have I ever gone on a crazy date
?
So you guys tell me if this iscrazy.
Speaker 2 (34:12):
I'm not sure if it is or not no-transcript place.
Speaker 3 (34:34):
So I come walking in right and they had this wall of
just pictures all over the place, you know people, and right in
the middle of that wall is apicture of me.
What, what, yeah, she had, andit's not just like she printed
it on a piece of paper.
She had taken the file and shetold me that she's like like I
don't know if you guys have aCVS or a Walgreens and printed
it on like, yeah, like a glossypiece of paper framed it, put it
(34:58):
right on the wall.
Speaker 1 (34:59):
Was this a joke?
Speaker 3 (35:00):
No, no, no, she was dead serious.
She goes.
These are all my friends andyou're my friend no, and I'm
thinking in my head.
Silence of the lambs.
Speaker 2 (35:06):
There's a dungeon down here yeah I if it was a
joke it would be one thing likeif it was a joke it is.
It is kind of a funny joke likethat's something my husband
would have done as a joke.
Speaker 1 (35:16):
That's what I'm.
That was, that was our.
Speaker 3 (35:17):
That was our first date right I like I came to
visit her and I was just like,yeah, so here's.
The other thing too.
Is so I fall asleep, or try tofall asleep on the couch, right,
I'm like sleeping with one eyeopen, I go, I'm gonna get
drugged you're wearing your skinin the morning exactly right,
you know, rub the lotion on theskin.
Super freaky.
Anyhow I wake up, you know,just think of a doorframe, right
(35:40):
, you know, and she is likepeeking through, like with one
eye, you know oh my god right atme the whole time and I wake up
and I'm like, hey, what's goingon?
And she's like man justwatching you sleep, just you
know, just keeps me peace, orsomething she said this yes, it
was something odd.
It was like, oh, you're sobeautiful watching you sleep and
I was just like, well, I am me,so we're good.
(36:01):
But at the same time I was justlike, oh my God, here's the
cool thing about it was my phone.
The alarm went off, right, andI pretended it was a phone call,
so I turned off the alarm.
I was like hello, and I made itlike this whole dramatic thing,
like, oh my God, I got to getback.
You know, something happened.
She's like okay, we'll keep intouch.
Speaker 2 (36:22):
Hell no, yeah, that's a special kind of crazy.
That's like crazy crazy.
That's like that's likelegitimately, like certifiably
crazy.
Yeah Was she great?
Speaker 1 (36:32):
other than those comments, was she normal?
Speaker 3 (36:35):
No, no.
So later on I found out allthese lies about she, came clean
about all these lies aboutherself and I was just like holy
crap, really, where do youthink this is gonna go?
You know, in life, you know, ifwe were to be something, you
know, come on now.
Yeah, why I don't.
That's the part I don't get,why people just can't be.
You know.
You know themselves right likeauthentic right, you know one of
(36:55):
the biggest accomplishments youcould have in your life is just
being your authentic self.
You know, whatever that mightbe, yeah, it's true.
Speaker 1 (37:01):
so to finish off that is infidelity, of course I feel
like once.
Yeah, it's true.
So to finish off thisinfidelity, of course I feel
like once you cheat, it's hardto go back.
Communication, and what's funnyis they say that you know a lot
of people brag about neverarguing in their relationship,
which that's not normal.
Did you see?
George Clooney in his lastinterview was like Amal and I
have never had an argument.
We always try to find somethingto fight about.
Speaker 2 (37:29):
Is that normal?
I feel like there's alwaysgoing to be conflict in a
marriage and they've beentogether years.
They have kids.
There's always conflict, butthey might not have like knock
down drag out whatever you callit argument.
Maybe they're just mature,maybe they're just mature and
when they have conflict aboutstuff they just like talk about
it and work through it.
So it is conflict and it isdiffering opinions, but they're
not toxic about it and fightingabout it.
Speaker 1 (37:47):
I could see that I don't know.
And then lack of respect is oneyou have to respect each other
and not talk down to each otheror roll your eyes at each other.
And if your partner mocks you,sneers or is hostile, it's a
sign of disgust.
But why would you ever be withsomeone that is disrespectful
towards you?
Speaker 3 (38:03):
Or why would you be with someone that is
disrespectful towards you, orwhy would you be with someone
that you don't respect?
Goes to her point.
People are just jumping intothe relationship and getting
married for no reason.
Speaker 2 (38:10):
Right, well, and then like to like resting bitch face
, I roll my eyes like it's likenothing and I mean no disrespect
by it, like so it's, some ofthat stuff is like kind of you
got to take it a little bit witha grain of salt, but um, yeah,
no, respect is big, I thinkquickly a difference in
priorities.
Speaker 1 (38:29):
You know, someone might just want a casual
relationship, no stringsattached, whereas the other one
is ready to introduce them toher family.
Speaker 2 (38:36):
Um, but that's communication too, though,
because if you're yeah, yeah, ifyou're not looking for a
serious relationship, I feellike you need to say that,
because a lot of people go intodates or go into dating
situations and they're nothonest about that.
It's true, you know they actlike they want a relationship
when they really are not lookingfor that.
Speaker 1 (38:56):
I feel like you need to put it out there in the
beginning what you're lookingfor and what you want.
So, the next one.
Different life goals can end arelationship.
I know someone that was adamantabout saving for retirement,
like all the money they put intowas going to retirement.
His partner had the mentalityyou could die tomorrow.
I don't want to save money forretirement because you might not
get to retire, so she wasspending it all.
That didn't work out.
(39:16):
Same thing with kids.
A guy I knew didn't want kids,had a vasectomy, was upfront.
It met this girl.
She thought she could changehis mind.
They got married.
Then she asked him for areversal and he's like nope,
they got divorced again.
I think you really need to beupfront about you know what?
Speaker 3 (39:32):
you want.
So going back to the you knowpeople saving for retirement
that podcast I was telling youabout, that I was listening to
the financial advisor said yeah,the husband didn't do anything,
just save, save, saved.
He retired the day, the nextday he died.
And the wife comes in is likeyou know.
And he had a couple milliondollars saved and the wife comes
in.
She's like now what?
And I had all these years totravel and see the world.
(39:54):
My husband, the man that I lovemore than anything.
Now I have all this money to godo what.
You know, I don't have no oneto go travel with.
So you're right, you know, youwant to experience the things as
you go along.
Now, yeah, you know yeah soit's true.
Speaker 1 (40:06):
The last one is sex and intimacy.
That can break a relationship.
Speaker 3 (40:09):
If someone's super sexual and someone's not really,
then it can end therelationship so there's a book
called 101 questions to askbefore you get engaged and you
know, in my understanding fromthe book it's like the really
hard questions.
I think everyone should justread that book.
It's like the really hardquestions.
I think everyone should justread that book.
It's like it's going to answera lot of that, but yeah and um,
(40:32):
um.
I think people should read itand see if they are a match,
instead of just jumping in andjust like, okay, I'm gonna get
married safe time right.
Speaker 2 (40:39):
Start bringing it to your first date and be like
we're gonna start on page one.
They're so funny.
Speaker 3 (40:43):
There was a guy that brought it on his second date,
oh really, and he ended upmarrying his wife and they've
been married forever oh my god,he brought a second date and she
goes perfect they went downevery list of the things oh, how
funny.
Speaker 1 (40:54):
So now it's time for the celebrity cut, where we
marinate in the juices of thecelebrity.
So you know who I have madrespect for.
Now, after seeing her interviewon call her daddy podcast,
chloe kardashian, I haven'treally had a positive opinion on
the kardashians.
I don't know how I feel aboutkim or kendall or kylie, but I
love chloe kardashian.
Now do you know much about her?
Did you see that interview?
Like she's so nice and kind andwell-spoken and smart and real
(41:19):
and authentic.
And then she was saying how shewent to a therapist after the
whole cheating scandal and thetherapist released all of her
docs to the press.
Oh, seriously yes, which is ahuge HIPAA violation right, yeah
, but the host was like did yousue?
And she's like no, that's justnot me.
You know what am I going togain out of it?
I don't need money and that'sjust gonna, you know, rehash all
(41:40):
the trauma.
And then she went to get IVFwith her ex-husband and the
doctor's office released herrecords again for a second time
which again huge violation, butagain she didn't sue.
Wow, she just.
I don't know.
I was very impressed with her.
I.
She's someone I could totallybe friends with.
She seems fun and I love howChris, her mother, lives right
(42:00):
next door to her and she likespies on her and she'll call
Chloe.
Be like where are you going,huh?
Whose whose car is that?
Who's over?
That's funny.
I wish I lived close to my momlike that not me.
Speaker 3 (42:11):
No, really, heck.
No, be my business all the time.
Speaker 1 (42:14):
There's no way to want that so where's your
favorite place to go on a firstdate?
Speaker 3 (42:20):
um, I like speakeasies.
Oh yeah, you know they have.
Um, they're kind of dark.
You know you're trying tofigure out where the wall is to
go through and then you open upand it's like this really nice
place to check out which is yourfavorite one in town?
So I've been to a few um.
I've been to a couple ingilbert, you know because I live
out that way, and then I'vebeen to one in chandler, a
couple in um in uh, scottsdale,but so far the one I liked was
(42:45):
the one in Gilbert.
Speaker 1 (42:45):
Is that the White Rabbit?
Yeah, I've heard of that.
Speaker 3 (42:48):
You have to have a password.
They email you once a month.
There's a new one.
That it's like a plane ticket.
You know the old-fashionedCarry on.
Speaker 1 (42:58):
Yes the old-fashioned ?
Yeah, I've heard of that one Iwant to go, but they're always
full up.
You have to like wait in lineonline to get a spot.
Speaker 3 (43:05):
So they send it to you every Monday, like you get
it every Monday, and then youjust got to get on right away,
right, have you been to the oneat Rennan Wolf downtown?
No, I've heard about it though.
Yeah, I like that one thatone's my favorite, yeah, oh.
Speaker 2 (43:20):
I like that and it's like a hunting cabin inside Is
that the one with the Roosevelt.
Speaker 3 (43:25):
There's one with like Roosevelt on a wall, or maybe
that one's called the Roosevelt.
Speaker 2 (43:29):
I don't know that one .
Yeah, I don't know, but it's,the inside is all like dark and
leather and like it's like acabin.
It's cool.
Speaker 3 (43:39):
Because there's also one that's like a disco club,
you know you go in.
And there was another one Icame across because you know
those influencers that are onsocial media.
You know they post a lot aboutit.
There was one that the entireroom, or the whole place, was
all red.
You know everything was red.
And I was just like ooh, that'spretty bitchin', yeah, you know
.
Speaker 1 (43:59):
So I have a question for you Are you down for the
challenge?
Up for?
Speaker 3 (44:02):
the grab Depends on the challenge challenge willing
to share.
Speaker 1 (44:04):
Pick one, if you dare .
Hopefully it's a juicy one,because the last episode wasn't
so juicy, I needed my fix weneed a spicy question this week.
Speaker 3 (44:15):
Paulo, let's go oh, this one just says um, do you
have a hidden talent?
Speaker 1 (44:20):
oh, do you have a hidden talent?
Speaker 3 (44:22):
I don't think I do really.
I think the only thing that Idon't know, if it's hidden
people that tend to tell methings that are just that I
don't think they would tellanybody else.
Like we'll be hanging out andjust say something random and
I'm like, really, you're goingto tell me this right now.
(44:42):
I'll give you an example.
So I went out with this, thiswoman, and we're shooting the
breeze and she's telling meabout how she went hunting in
Africa, right, and I'm like withher ex-husband now, right,
she's telling me about it.
And in that conversation shetalks, you know, brings in you
know the word.
She says the word strip club.
And I'm like, what, what doesthat have to do with hunting,
you know, in Africa, you know?
So I asked her to go.
You know, you brought up stripclub.
Was that means?
Oh, it's just.
(45:02):
When my husband and I weretogether we used to swing, you
know, and she started going intodetail about how she would go
to this house and whatnot.
And you know, she'd hook upwith, you know, four, five, six
dudes, you know, and whatnot.
In the middle of our date, herphone starts, you know, chiming,
and she's like, oh it's, youknow, it's just no worry about
(45:24):
this.
It's my booty call.
You know he calls me so I canjust go there.
Oh my god, on the date, talkabout being transparent, right?
I'm like oh my god, that's sosexy, can we just hang?
Speaker 1 (45:34):
out again.
No, I'm never gonna hang outwith you.
I love how you're sostraightforward we're never
gonna hang out again.
Speaker 3 (45:41):
Are you high?
Seriously?
First of all, you want to tellme about you, you know.
You want to tell me about allthis weenie you're taking on,
you know.
You know on a daily basis.
Now you got some dude textingyou so you can leave here and go
get some more.
Oh my God, there's nothing,dude, we're never doing anything
.
Speaker 2 (45:58):
At least she weeded herself out early, though.
Oh my God.
Speaker 3 (46:00):
But it's like, it's like stuff like that People
would just.
Speaker 1 (46:03):
How did she take it when you said, no, we're not
going to see each other again?
Speaker 3 (46:06):
She was like okay.
Speaker 2 (46:08):
Because she's obviously got a roster.
She's got a roster, you know.
Speaker 3 (46:12):
It's just insane.
Like you know, I went onanother date and you know I
asked the lady I goes hey, whatdo you do for a living?
Because I didn't know.
Speaker 2 (46:34):
And she's like okay, cool, maybe you go ballet or
something.
No, I'm a stripper.
I'm like, I'm like, well, it'sso funny because I just saw a
clip from another podcast andthey were talking about this
because they were, they werearguing.
I think the one of the guestson was a stripper and the guy,
the male host, was like, likewhy do you call it dancing?
Because you, essentially, youare stripping.
You don't have to dance upthere.
Like you really don't have todance, you can just stand up
(46:57):
there, walk back and forth, takeyour clothes off, and it's
stripping.
Like, let's call it what it is.
Yeah, some of them do dance andthere are some really good
dancers.
I've been to some strip clubswith amazing dancers, don't get
me wrong.
There are dancers, but it'slike, essentially, if you're
just walking back and forthtaking your clothes off, you're
not really a dancer, you're justa stripper, right?
Speaker 3 (47:19):
And I've had women I'll go on a date Um, even,
sometimes even just leading upto it, not even going on a date,
and they're just asking youknow, hey, can you pay for my
rent?
Hey, you know I can't afford.
You know, food for my kids?
Hey, I can't have money for gas.
I'm like, does this look a ATMto you?
Speaker 2 (47:35):
You know I've been on .
I've been on a date where theguy asked me to help him pay his
rent, so that that goes bothways Paolo men do it too Well,
I'm not on that side, right, I'mon this side, so I only hear
you know you know what they have
Speaker 3 (47:47):
to say but it's just, it's just bizarre.
You know how people are just soblunt with me on certain things
.
It's like damn.
And then I asked friends ofmine they go, I've never heard,
they'd ever hear anything,nothing, bizarre.
Speaker 2 (47:58):
It's nice though, because it's sort of it, does it
like it?
The trash takes itself out.
Then at that point, right, youknow what I mean.
Speaker 3 (48:05):
I get that, but it's just it's just funny how people
just open up, you know and um,and I thought, okay, maybe it's
just like a date thing, right,people open up.
No, I.
I meet random people.
They just want to open up andjust want to talk about whatever
, and I'm like God, it'sseriously right now.
Yeah, you know, so it's justfunny.
Speaker 2 (48:22):
I bet you wish all the hot ladies would open up she
had to put something spicy in,because the question was so
vanilla.
Speaker 1 (48:30):
I did have to tell you the question was yeah I did
have a joke that I wanted totell when we were talking about
australia.
I forgot to sneak it in, soI'll sneak it in now.
What is the difference betweena french kiss and an australian
kiss?
An australian kiss is the samething as a french kiss, but it's
down under.
Do you have any other questions?
No, do you have any other itemsyou want to share?
Speaker 3 (48:51):
No, I don't think so right now.
Speaker 1 (48:52):
Well, thank you so much for joining us this week at
the Meat Market.
Thank you so much, paolo, forbeing here.
If you want to go on a datewith our 6'3 Paolo, send us a DM
at Meat Market Podcast.
And thank you so much to oursponsor, tactical Tax Strategies
.
If you want to save money andkeep more in your wallet, go to
Tactical Tax Strategies.
Thank you so much and we'll seeyou next week at the meat
(49:13):
market.
Oh my God, I just totally gotcatfished.
He looks absolutely nothinglike his picture.
Speaker 2 (49:20):
So I found out, the guy that I've been dating is
married with kids.
His wife just reached out to me.
Host
Lyndsie and Jess
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