September 20, 2024 • 28 mins
Lead singer of The Hyperdrive Kittens, Jenene thrives in the spotlight. So when she got an offer to meet her Dad for the first time, on television, she jumped at the chance. This fateful meeting launched a series of revelations that rocked her world, and changed everything one family knew to be true.
Join us for a rollercoaster of laughter and tears as we put together Jenene's "Heart Puzzle" and navigate the complexities of family and identity.
This is Part One of Jenene's story, tune in to Part Two: Long Lost Sisters for the conclusion!
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
This is the Abbey Normal podcast, here to tell you that you're weird and that's normal.
We're reuniting family members who've been separated for as long as 50 years,
and then the second case was 35 years, I think. This is Janine.
Janine did grow up knowing she was adopted, but she didn't have any information
about her biological mother and no information about her father.
(00:22):
I mean, did you know that like since you were... I did.
A child. Yes, Yes, because all my brothers and sisters and I were adopted.
So it was never like, we have to sit down and tell you something.
You know, it was always like, when we adopted you, you know,
you were wanted, you were desired. So it was never like a surprise.
But you were brought up in a good family. Oh, I had a great family.
Yeah. Are they still with us? Yes. And they're so supportive and excited for me.
(00:47):
But you didn't know your biological parents at all? No. And my parents were
really supportive of us, like trying to learn.
Did you ever wonder about your parents when you were little,
when you were growing up?
Yeah, I always have wondered. I always wonder where I got my looks.
That was really important to me.
You know, where did I get my small nose and my big hips? And,
you know, I want to know who to blame for that. But yes.
(01:09):
And for me, I had a really good relationship with my dad, but my mom and I didn't.
And so I spent most of my time thinking like, well, what was my mother like?
But there's a lot of questions. I was always curious about my medical background
because Because I was born, I had some kind of unusual things. I had six fingers.
And I kind of wondered what caused that. And, you know, just some kind of interesting
(01:32):
things. So I was very curious.
Janine was adopted. And there were things about her body that she was curious about.
She wanted an explanation for those six fingers that she was born with.
She wanted to look at a woman with lovely wide hips and think,
that's where mine came from.
(01:53):
You're hearing her on the infamous Sally Jesse Raphael show in 1994.
Can you put yourself in my shoes and know how wonderful it feels to be able to do this?
Just feels so good. Some of my favorite shows and I'm having a wonderful time.
Today we're going to rewind and hear her full story, some of which we know now
(02:13):
and some that's still a big question mark. She does get answers,
but now she understands that nothing comes in the order that we want it to.
As a little girl, Janine's most urgent questions were about her mother.
She's going to describe those daydreams. And as we go, you'll hear her sister
laughing a bit in the background.
(02:35):
There'd always been the, oh, what's my real mom like? And as a little, little girl...
I used to think maybe I was like a princess until I found out that they didn't give away royalty.
So that was a little bit of a heartbreak, you know, because I had my little
fantasy about one day I'd find my I'd find my my mother and she would be a queen. Yes. Yes.
(02:59):
People were saying I look like Betty Davis. I'm like, well, maybe I relate to
Betty Davis. Like, you know, like I have Betty Davis eyes or whatever,
you know. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
But yeah, so there are fantasies. But then as you get older,
you start to, okay, so who is this person?
She wondered how it would feel to look like your family for real.
And, you know, I didn't look anything like my brothers or sisters.
(03:20):
And so it was funny. Like my older brother, we were 18 months different.
And so when people found out we were brother and sister, I go, oh, yeah.
And I'm like, no, there's no resemblance when you're adopted. Oh, right, right.
Because you know how people are when they find out you're brother and sister.
Every time, probably. Oh, yeah, I can see it. No, you can't.
Her brother, Jess, has different biological parents. They were both adopted
(03:44):
in Utah. So with her parents' support, they started looking.
And my mom even tried to help me find, they went to Utah where we were adopted
in Utah, Jess, my older brother, and I, and they tried to get the envelope open,
but they're really strict there. Yeah. So, but they did try.
And then Jess had actually found a company in Utah and he found his birth mother first. Oh, okay.
(04:09):
And so when he found his birth mother, I was like, oh, well, okay.
And I kept thinking maybe I need to wait till I'm ready. But then I thought,
well, maybe, you know, you're never ready. It's one of those things.
And so I sent, I had a piece of paper that basically just said you were adopted
in this state from this adoption agency.
Your grandmother had blah, blah eyes. You know, just basics. Okay, okay.
(04:33):
So I send in this piece of paper to this company. I don't remember what the
company's name was. and I don't think it was that long, probably like,
maybe a month or two. And I got a phone call. It was on Father's Day, which is like universe.
And they said, okay, this doesn't happen very often. But in the process of looking
for your mother, we found your father.
And he'd been looking for you for 30 years.
(04:55):
Music.
And that was just like, wait, what? You know? Yeah, yeah.
It was like, wow. And so they gave me his number.
And I remember trying to call him up and not getting him and not getting him
and then realizing I was calling the work number instead of the home number
because it was on Sunday.
(05:17):
So I called him up. And the first thing out of his mouth was,
is this a darling named Janine? Because he had a Texas accent.
Yeah, I don't think I did that very well. But that was pretty good.
And so we started talking. And he said, I'm not an asshole. I didn't know about
you. I would have kept you like he just wanted the first thing you want me to know.
So we decided that we were going
(05:37):
to meet a month later in he was living in Colorado at the time, I think.
And I remember going to a party that day and telling people and just being in
shock and like, wow, I can't believe this. I can't believe this. Yeah.
So that was on Sunday, Father's Day. That following Friday, I got a phone call
and they said, how would you like to meet your dad?
(06:00):
I'm like, what? And they said, well, the CEOs of the corporation that they found
your birth father are doing the talk show circuits.
Oh, and I've always loved to be on stage.
I'm, I'm a singer and stuff. So I was like, um, sure. You know,
if he will do it, I'll do it.
And so that was on Friday. They flew us out on Sunday to New York,
(06:24):
which was my first time in New York.
And then we met Monday on Sally, Jesse.
Yeah. Great. Are you ready to meet your father? Mother, I'm so excited.
Janine has a choppy shag haircut, dyed auburn.
She's wearing a floral short-sleeved dress, 90s-style choker,
and dark red lip. You know that she's toned it down.
(06:47):
Light, come on out. Oh, my God. Meet your daughter.
Slay walks out in a suit and a big white cowboy hat, carrying an equally big white teddy bear.
He hugs her real tight. It's sweet. He's crying.
Her eyes are closed, and she's smiling. feeling they sit down on the couch why
(07:09):
i gotta see if you've got big hips,
and no she looks like her mother all right you have no idea about the daughter
or how to find her i should say no y'all excuse me give her give her that that's
all right that's all right Like you're in the flower and the teddy. I think she's... Aww.
(07:32):
He kisses her cheek and leans into a hug, his hand cradling the back of her head.
I'm like, don't do such things about you. Okay.
You must have a story to tell, right? Yes, ma'am. Can you explain? Oh, my gosh.
Did you watch the videos? Oh, yes. Well, take a seat.
(07:53):
See, when I was trying to look as conservative, I had that total,
like, mullet, like, orange mullet. Yeah, yeah.
And what did they tell you about how they wanted you to look?
They, well, so they wanted me to look conservative. I had a nose ring. They made me take it out.
They go, I just don't want to distract, you know, people with the,
you know. With the look. With the look.
Well, it kind of cracked me up because he comes out with like a teddy bear. Exactly.
(08:16):
And he's a cowboy from head to toe. He's a Stenson cowboy. Yeah. Oh, my gosh.
Were you expecting him to look like that? No. I mean, the two of you together
are just a fabulous TV duo.
I mean, see what I feel like as a little punk rock chick, you know,
with this guy in the cowboy hat.
Yeah. It was like he was as cowboy as they get. And I was trying to be as punk
(08:40):
rock as I could get, but I wasn't able to because they wanted me to look conservative as I could.
Before she walked out on that stage, she did have a little bit of information,
glowing reviews of her father.
But the funny thing was, so the night before I had gone to St.
(09:02):
Mark's Place and I was meeting people and people were like, oh, what are you doing here?
And so I was telling them my story. he was on the other side of
town meeting people and telling them their story and
I guess he had been hanging out with the CEOs of
the corporation that were there okay so they came to my room when I got back
to the hotel they're like oh they want to meet you and they said they're you
know the partners wanted to
(09:22):
meet you and so when they said their partners anyway that wasn't the case,
But it was so funny. So they came to my hotel room and they're like,
oh, we just left your dad. He is so great.
And, you know, and so basically he was doing the same thing I was and the other,
(09:45):
you know, and then the part of New York. Right.
But yeah, everybody who met him, oh, he's so great. He's so great.
And even the next day when we were filming, we were separated in two different rooms.
And I was sitting in the backstage waiting to film mine.
And everybody coming out of his room were women. Every single one of them was
like, your dad is just wonderful.
(10:07):
I'm thinking, my dad's a big flirt.
So we actually stayed another night and were able to do like some,
like we did the boat around New York. We went to a karaoke bar.
So that was fun. And they got us a different flight back so that we could stay
(10:28):
extra. And they got us a limo to take us to the airport. port.
And I got to meet his wife because we had a layover in Colorado. So I got to meet his wife.
Wow. Meeting your long lost parent on national TV, bebopping around New York
City high on this twist in your life story. What an adventure.
(10:48):
And it continued for a little bit as they got to know each other.
And I did go visit him. It was around the time the show aired.
So people were recognizing us. Yeah. Oh, how funny. Yeah. We were walking around
different places. Oh, we saw you.
So there had been times over the course of my life where people recognize me
(11:09):
from the show. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, how funny. Yeah.
Music.
Then came the inevitable crash back to real life.
You know, it's not always easy.
Like, you never know what. Like, be careful for what you ask for.
Because I was excited to know this person, but I also didn't want to change my life.
(11:35):
He wanted me to move there and work in his country western clothing store and,
you know, change my whole life.
And I'm like, I'm sorry. His name was Clay. I'm sorry, Clay.
Clay, but I'm happy to know you and get to know you, but I'm not changing my life, you know?
But when I think about, you know, he had 30 years of looking for me and I just,
oh, there's Clay, you know? Right, right.
(11:56):
Because I never thought about him. I was always more about my mother than my
father because I had, you know, a good relationship.
So it was kind of interesting the universe sent him first.
Music.
So there was there was some like, you know, like, oh, Clay's calling,
(12:19):
you know, like kind of hiding out a little bit. Oh, my gosh.
I mean, I can imagine that, you know, you wanted that itch scratched of like,
who are these people that biologically created me?
Yeah. But also you may or may not need to like have an ongoing relationship with them. Right. Yeah.
That's not I doesn't need to be part of the package. Yeah.
(12:42):
Like I was happy to know. I feel blessed that I got to, but there was some stuff that came up later.
And it was hard because there was a lot of pressure from him to come into his life and be there.
And I didn't really connect to my—I had two half-sisters and a half-brother.
(13:03):
Just didn't connect to them.
I mean, I'm glad to know they're out there, but I have a family.
So it was like, you know, it was just a little bit like— I felt I had a little guilt about that.
Music.
(13:26):
Okay, let's rewind to what we know of Clay's story. How did Janine come to be?
And how did the 35-year separation happen?
Yes, ma'am. Can you explain? Since you're the only one we've got, explain what happened.
Well, thank you. Men ain't supposed to do this, right? No, men do do that.
(13:50):
Real men do that, so that's okay.
Well, about 32 years ago, I was a military man. and I was stationed in Denver, Colorado. Okay.
And as servicemen do, you meet young ladies and we had an affair.
And so after a period of time, one day she said something to the effect, I think I'm pregnant.
And I said, well, please go to a doctor and you have the doctor confirmed.
(14:11):
And so she came and said, no, everything's fine.
She was not pregnant. She was not pregnant. She had lied to him about being pregnant.
She'd gone to him and said, I think I might be pregnant. And he said,
well, you know, in the video he says, Well, you know, find out, let me know.
And then she came back and said she didn't. And I get why she didn't tell him.
She didn't want to trap him. They weren't in love.
(14:32):
But it's like, you know, he didn't know about me until she called him a year
later to say, well, you do have a daughter.
And so a year later, I had already married and I got a phone call one night
and says, congratulations, you're a daddy. Betty.
So what happened was she had called him after she had given me up and lied and
said, I wasn't sure I'm getting married to this military man. I might keep her.
(14:55):
But I think she wanted him to know that he did have a daughter.
Okay. And by then he had gotten, I think they were married and had a kid on
the way. So it happened all really fast.
My guess is she probably felt guilty because it had been a year.
But at that point, by that time, I was adopted three days out of,
right out of the hospital. Three days, my parents got me.
(15:16):
And she said, well, I have going with the gentleman and the people that I was
with when Janine was born.
Was wanting to take her in for adoption. And I said, well, let me know what you're going to do.
Well, I'm a man. I had a lot of questions about, well, is Janine really mine?
I mean, you know, there's all kinds of things in there. So anyway,
(15:38):
I said, let me know. And so she said, okay.
Well, I never heard from her again. Never heard from the woman again.
Never again. And so as a consequence. Now, all these years, how many years ago? 31.
31 years ago, in the back of your mind, the woman
said she wasn't pregnant and suddenly she is you never
saw the baby it could have been a joke it could
(15:58):
have been any one of a number of things i wonder if i have a child right
exactly and then what and then i had that question for
a lot of years now when she was have been about five years old i'm a little
older i'm a little more mature and i understand what's going on in the world
and i'm packing a lot of baggage because you have that question in the back
of your mind sure so i started looking for and actually i was looking for her
(16:19):
mother because if i could find her where is she?
Right. And so, anyway, I was chasing the dead horse because it turned out,
as I found out last Sunday, Father's Day, that she had been adopted.
And I didn't even know what her name was or anything else. Have you ever found
the woman who was her mother?
Did you, have you, Janine, are you still trying to find her?
(16:42):
I'd love to find her. But you have no idea where she is? No,
the locators are still looking for her.
And we're hoping maybe through the show or something. Dad, what do you think about this?
Music.
Moe did not offer any leads on the whereabouts of Janine's mom.
But she and Clay did not stop looking. And Clay especially was like a dog with a bone.
(17:05):
For 15 years, he continued looking, trying to answer Janine's final question.
It was about 15 years later, you know, I'd had a relationship with them.
And Clay calls me up and says, don't get your panties in a bunch,
but I think we found your mom.
(17:28):
So he had figured out that she had married a military man, and one day he just
Googled him and found out the guy had died, but he had a sister, a twin sister.
And I don't know if he called the sister or how, but somehow he got through
a number to get to Julie, our half-sister, and through there he got Vicki.
He found Vicki, Janine's biological mother, and it wasn't a moment it too soon.
(17:52):
The crazy thing was Vicki had been in the hospital. She had coded, basically died.
There was some told her it wasn't her time. She came back out, went into rehab.
And then the week she got back from rehab was when we, when Clay found her.
So weird. Yeah. And I just go, okay, the universe is just working all over the place. Right, right.
(18:14):
It was, it was pretty amazing. Like we, we found out, like I was talking to
her so much that I got got in trouble with my phone.
I have a phone group. And they're like, okay, we're using too many minutes.
Back in the day where you had to count your minutes. Yeah, exactly.
So it was amazing just getting to know her and finding out I look just like her.
(18:36):
Seriously, when I she sent me pictures of her baby face.
And oh my god, and then we were walking and I could see our legs.
I mean, I got the big hips, you know, and the legs, got the calves.
But yeah, I look just like her. And we have a lot in common.
Like, she loved movies. She loved music.
So we have a lot, a lot in common. Yeah.
(18:59):
We talked for about a month, and nobody knew about it. Nobody knew about it.
You and Vicki talked. Yeah.
Nobody knew about Janine's existence, so it was time for secrets to be forced to the surface.
It took about a month, and I was like, Vicki, you got to tell somebody. You basically died.
(19:19):
Right. If you died, nobody knows I'm here. Right. So she told her best friend,
and then she told, you know, slowly, and finally she told her daughters.
Okay, okay. And Jenny was right away excited about meeting me.
Julie, that's so funny. Julie wasn't. I need to, like, draw a tree right now.
Seriously. I'm on track of everything.
Oh, my gosh. Okay. It's not that complicated. There's just a lot of J names.
(19:44):
So, Dad is Clay. Mom is Vicky.
Janine's half-sisters are Jenny and Julie.
And it turned out that Janine was only the first of Vicky's secrets or untruths to be revealed. old.
It was good getting to know her, but there was a lot of like stuff.
She was emotionally a big mess.
(20:04):
When I met her, we started talking. She had been disowned by her parents when
she married the first time she married out of her faith because she was Orthodox Jew.
And she did not want her daughters to know this. I guess she didn't want them
to know the grandparents had done this.
So she had told them that her parents and sister had died in a car crash. And I did not know this.
(20:29):
Janine did not know this. So first, the secret came to light that she existed.
And then when she connected with her half sisters, another cat was out of the bag.
And so I remember talking to Jenny and saying, you know, that really sucks what they did to our mom.
And she didn't know what I was talking about. It's like, wait,
what are you talking about? I'm like, what are you talking about?
(20:51):
And so the next day, I get a call from Vicki
crying and upset and she's like why did you
tell them i didn't want him to know blah blah i'm like i don't vicky this is
who you are they're gonna understand it's why you know it's like it's it's part
of who you are right and so she told them the truth like and you know jenny
was like she didn't even know they were jewish right you know yeah blood russian jew we're russian jew.
(21:20):
You know, Vicky started telling everybody, and then I got to meet them.
And that was kind of crazy going out there and meeting them.
And, you know, let's look at each, you know, what do we have the same?
You know, Jenny and I look the most alike.
Like, we look like Vicky. And then Julie, she's the youngest.
She looks like her dad. Okay. Yeah.
This is Janine meeting her biological mother, Vicky, in person for the first time.
(21:44):
Oh, wait. Oh, my God. Oh, you're beautiful.
What do you think, you guys? Do we look alike? Definitely.
Nikki, this is going to be on Facebook, so say hi to everybody.
All my friends are going to see it. On Facebook? Yeah, all my friends are going to see it. Hi.
It's like a dream come true. They hug for so long and then lean back slightly
(22:10):
and look at each other, still holding on tight.
Do I look like I thought I would? You look exactly like your pictures, Noah.
Do I? I can see our face shape. It's totally. We have the forehead.
Oh. Wow. I can't believe this day is here. My older daughter. That's right.
(22:34):
They do look alike. I mean, Janine is stylish in a black dress, dark, cute shag hair.
And Vicky's older in a purple sweater, jeans, pixie hair. but they do have the
same big dreamy eyes and little button nose.
Music.
(22:59):
Photos from their lives Janine pulled out a picture from
when she first moved to San Francisco and Vicky responded you
really cut loose didn't you it was a sweet time but even then Vicky wasn't in
the best health so after their visit Janine found ways to connect long distance
I knew she loved movies and she couldn't go to the theaters and so I would do
(23:22):
Bit Torrents you know remember Remember BitTorrents? Yes.
I would download Burn and send her CDs or DVDs so that she could see the movies that were playing.
So I did a lot of that and music.
Yeah. Yeah. Good. So yeah. So we did share that. And I remember when the Oscars
were coming up, we would spend a lot of time talking about the Oscars.
So yeah. So we had a lot of that in common. I think she had a good heart.
(23:46):
I think she was just really broken.
And I think there was some, I don't know. No, the thing is, it's hard to know
what was real because some of the stuff feels like maybe mentally,
emotionally, she was, you know, she had tried to kill herself after she had
her last daughter and was in an institution for a year and had shock treatment.
(24:06):
Oh, God. Yeah. So, I mean, seriously, it was like a lifetime movie.
Seriously, it could be, you know. And I think there might have been some molestation
also that she started remembering from her childhood. Mm-hmm.
There was no diagnosis that you know of as far as mental illness? No.
(24:29):
Vicki passed away not long after that first meeting.
How did you feel when she passed?
It's so different. It's so different, you know, compared to like my mom,
you know, that raised me and was my mom, right? Right.
It's like she was my birth mother. I'm happy I got to know her,
(24:51):
but it was just different.
It's different that it wasn't that intensity that I was kind of more relieved
for her that she's not, you know, because she was on oxygen and,
you know, not doing too good.
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You never really knew her like physically well.
No. Yeah. You know, we spent a lot of time talking.
(25:15):
She was relieved that Vicki was released, and she had her own realization.
You know, after Vicki had called me up that day and was upset that I had told
her daughters, I remember calling my mom crying, going, I'm so thankful.
You know, we had a hard time, mom, but thank you for not lying to me.
Because, you know, and it just, the more I got to know what my life would have
been like, the more I was so grateful for my life.
(25:39):
Music.
Jane also felt good about what she helped to accomplish, opening the windows
of this family, clearing out the secrets, so that Vicki could leave with a clear
conscience and all of her daughters could live authentically,
(26:00):
knowing truly who they are.
So, here I am. You know, Vicki, she's pretty much, she's on oxygen.
She's going to die. She's in hospice. We surprise her for her birthday. day.
I've been so proud feeling like all the lies are out into the,
you know, I've helped bring out, you know, all this truth into the family.
(26:22):
You know, the things that needed to be said were said. And, you know,
and it's like, okay, you know, she can die with a clear conscience. Yeah.
But it turned out that there was more that they didn't know.
Tune in next time for a bombshell discovery and Janine's story.
A story that, of course, is not hers alone, but that of a bloodline.
(26:45):
Michelle comes along and like, hold my beer. Here I am.
So I thought I was the big secret in the family. Nope.
Here I am.
Music.
This is the Abbey Normal podcast, here to tell you that you're weird and that's normal.
We're reuniting family members who've been separated for as long as 50 years,
and then the second case was 35 years, I think. This is Janine.
Janine did grow up knowing she was adopted, but she didn't have any information
about her biological mother and no information about her father.
(00:22):
I mean, did you know that like since you were... I did.
A child. Yes, Yes, because all my brothers and sisters and I were adopted.
So it was never like, we have to sit down and tell you something.
You know, it was always like, when we adopted you, you know,
you were wanted, you were desired. So it was never like a surprise.
But you were brought up in a good family. Oh, I had a great family.
Yeah. Are they still with us? Yes. And they're so supportive and excited for me.
(00:47):
But you didn't know your biological parents at all? No. And my parents were
really supportive of us, like trying to learn.
Did you ever wonder about your parents when you were little,
when you were growing up?
Yeah, I always have wondered. I always wonder where I got my looks.
That was really important to me.
You know, where did I get my small nose and my big hips? And,
you know, I want to know who to blame for that. But yes.
(01:09):
And for me, I had a really good relationship with my dad, but my mom and I didn't.
And so I spent most of my time thinking like, well, what was my mother like?
But there's a lot of questions. I was always curious about my medical background
because Because I was born, I had some kind of unusual things. I had six fingers.
And I kind of wondered what caused that. And, you know, just some kind of interesting
(01:32):
things. So I was very curious.
Janine was adopted. And there were things about her body that she was curious about.
She wanted an explanation for those six fingers that she was born with.
She wanted to look at a woman with lovely wide hips and think,
that's where mine came from.
(01:53):
You're hearing her on the infamous Sally Jesse Raphael show in 1994.
Can you put yourself in my shoes and know how wonderful it feels to be able to do this?
Just feels so good. Some of my favorite shows and I'm having a wonderful time.
Today we're going to rewind and hear her full story, some of which we know now
(02:13):
and some that's still a big question mark. She does get answers,
but now she understands that nothing comes in the order that we want it to.
As a little girl, Janine's most urgent questions were about her mother.
She's going to describe those daydreams. And as we go, you'll hear her sister
laughing a bit in the background.
(02:35):
There'd always been the, oh, what's my real mom like? And as a little, little girl...
I used to think maybe I was like a princess until I found out that they didn't give away royalty.
So that was a little bit of a heartbreak, you know, because I had my little
fantasy about one day I'd find my I'd find my my mother and she would be a queen. Yes. Yes.
(02:59):
People were saying I look like Betty Davis. I'm like, well, maybe I relate to
Betty Davis. Like, you know, like I have Betty Davis eyes or whatever,
you know. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
But yeah, so there are fantasies. But then as you get older,
you start to, okay, so who is this person?
She wondered how it would feel to look like your family for real.
And, you know, I didn't look anything like my brothers or sisters.
(03:20):
And so it was funny. Like my older brother, we were 18 months different.
And so when people found out we were brother and sister, I go, oh, yeah.
And I'm like, no, there's no resemblance when you're adopted. Oh, right, right.
Because you know how people are when they find out you're brother and sister.
Every time, probably. Oh, yeah, I can see it. No, you can't.
Her brother, Jess, has different biological parents. They were both adopted
(03:44):
in Utah. So with her parents' support, they started looking.
And my mom even tried to help me find, they went to Utah where we were adopted
in Utah, Jess, my older brother, and I, and they tried to get the envelope open,
but they're really strict there. Yeah. So, but they did try.
And then Jess had actually found a company in Utah and he found his birth mother first. Oh, okay.
(04:09):
And so when he found his birth mother, I was like, oh, well, okay.
And I kept thinking maybe I need to wait till I'm ready. But then I thought,
well, maybe, you know, you're never ready. It's one of those things.
And so I sent, I had a piece of paper that basically just said you were adopted
in this state from this adoption agency.
Your grandmother had blah, blah eyes. You know, just basics. Okay, okay.
(04:33):
So I send in this piece of paper to this company. I don't remember what the
company's name was. and I don't think it was that long, probably like,
maybe a month or two. And I got a phone call. It was on Father's Day, which is like universe.
And they said, okay, this doesn't happen very often. But in the process of looking
for your mother, we found your father.
And he'd been looking for you for 30 years.
(04:55):
Music.
And that was just like, wait, what? You know? Yeah, yeah.
It was like, wow. And so they gave me his number.
And I remember trying to call him up and not getting him and not getting him
and then realizing I was calling the work number instead of the home number
because it was on Sunday.
(05:17):
So I called him up. And the first thing out of his mouth was,
is this a darling named Janine? Because he had a Texas accent.
Yeah, I don't think I did that very well. But that was pretty good.
And so we started talking. And he said, I'm not an asshole. I didn't know about
you. I would have kept you like he just wanted the first thing you want me to know.
So we decided that we were going
(05:37):
to meet a month later in he was living in Colorado at the time, I think.
And I remember going to a party that day and telling people and just being in
shock and like, wow, I can't believe this. I can't believe this. Yeah.
So that was on Sunday, Father's Day. That following Friday, I got a phone call
and they said, how would you like to meet your dad?
(06:00):
I'm like, what? And they said, well, the CEOs of the corporation that they found
your birth father are doing the talk show circuits.
Oh, and I've always loved to be on stage.
I'm, I'm a singer and stuff. So I was like, um, sure. You know,
if he will do it, I'll do it.
And so that was on Friday. They flew us out on Sunday to New York,
(06:24):
which was my first time in New York.
And then we met Monday on Sally, Jesse.
Yeah. Great. Are you ready to meet your father? Mother, I'm so excited.
Janine has a choppy shag haircut, dyed auburn.
She's wearing a floral short-sleeved dress, 90s-style choker,
and dark red lip. You know that she's toned it down.
(06:47):
Light, come on out. Oh, my God. Meet your daughter.
Slay walks out in a suit and a big white cowboy hat, carrying an equally big white teddy bear.
He hugs her real tight. It's sweet. He's crying.
Her eyes are closed, and she's smiling. feeling they sit down on the couch why
(07:09):
i gotta see if you've got big hips,
and no she looks like her mother all right you have no idea about the daughter
or how to find her i should say no y'all excuse me give her give her that that's
all right that's all right Like you're in the flower and the teddy. I think she's... Aww.
(07:32):
He kisses her cheek and leans into a hug, his hand cradling the back of her head.
I'm like, don't do such things about you. Okay.
You must have a story to tell, right? Yes, ma'am. Can you explain? Oh, my gosh.
Did you watch the videos? Oh, yes. Well, take a seat.
(07:53):
See, when I was trying to look as conservative, I had that total,
like, mullet, like, orange mullet. Yeah, yeah.
And what did they tell you about how they wanted you to look?
They, well, so they wanted me to look conservative. I had a nose ring. They made me take it out.
They go, I just don't want to distract, you know, people with the,
you know. With the look. With the look.
Well, it kind of cracked me up because he comes out with like a teddy bear. Exactly.
(08:16):
And he's a cowboy from head to toe. He's a Stenson cowboy. Yeah. Oh, my gosh.
Were you expecting him to look like that? No. I mean, the two of you together
are just a fabulous TV duo.
I mean, see what I feel like as a little punk rock chick, you know,
with this guy in the cowboy hat.
Yeah. It was like he was as cowboy as they get. And I was trying to be as punk
(08:40):
rock as I could get, but I wasn't able to because they wanted me to look conservative as I could.
Before she walked out on that stage, she did have a little bit of information,
glowing reviews of her father.
But the funny thing was, so the night before I had gone to St.
(09:02):
Mark's Place and I was meeting people and people were like, oh, what are you doing here?
And so I was telling them my story. he was on the other side of
town meeting people and telling them their story and
I guess he had been hanging out with the CEOs of
the corporation that were there okay so they came to my room when I got back
to the hotel they're like oh they want to meet you and they said they're you
know the partners wanted to
(09:22):
meet you and so when they said their partners anyway that wasn't the case,
But it was so funny. So they came to my hotel room and they're like,
oh, we just left your dad. He is so great.
And, you know, and so basically he was doing the same thing I was and the other,
(09:45):
you know, and then the part of New York. Right.
But yeah, everybody who met him, oh, he's so great. He's so great.
And even the next day when we were filming, we were separated in two different rooms.
And I was sitting in the backstage waiting to film mine.
And everybody coming out of his room were women. Every single one of them was
like, your dad is just wonderful.
(10:07):
I'm thinking, my dad's a big flirt.
So we actually stayed another night and were able to do like some,
like we did the boat around New York. We went to a karaoke bar.
So that was fun. And they got us a different flight back so that we could stay
(10:28):
extra. And they got us a limo to take us to the airport. port.
And I got to meet his wife because we had a layover in Colorado. So I got to meet his wife.
Wow. Meeting your long lost parent on national TV, bebopping around New York
City high on this twist in your life story. What an adventure.
(10:48):
And it continued for a little bit as they got to know each other.
And I did go visit him. It was around the time the show aired.
So people were recognizing us. Yeah. Oh, how funny. Yeah. We were walking around
different places. Oh, we saw you.
So there had been times over the course of my life where people recognize me
(11:09):
from the show. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, how funny. Yeah.
Music.
Then came the inevitable crash back to real life.
You know, it's not always easy.
Like, you never know what. Like, be careful for what you ask for.
Because I was excited to know this person, but I also didn't want to change my life.
(11:35):
He wanted me to move there and work in his country western clothing store and,
you know, change my whole life.
And I'm like, I'm sorry. His name was Clay. I'm sorry, Clay.
Clay, but I'm happy to know you and get to know you, but I'm not changing my life, you know?
But when I think about, you know, he had 30 years of looking for me and I just,
oh, there's Clay, you know? Right, right.
(11:56):
Because I never thought about him. I was always more about my mother than my
father because I had, you know, a good relationship.
So it was kind of interesting the universe sent him first.
Music.
So there was there was some like, you know, like, oh, Clay's calling,
(12:19):
you know, like kind of hiding out a little bit. Oh, my gosh.
I mean, I can imagine that, you know, you wanted that itch scratched of like,
who are these people that biologically created me?
Yeah. But also you may or may not need to like have an ongoing relationship with them. Right. Yeah.
That's not I doesn't need to be part of the package. Yeah.
(12:42):
Like I was happy to know. I feel blessed that I got to, but there was some stuff that came up later.
And it was hard because there was a lot of pressure from him to come into his life and be there.
And I didn't really connect to my—I had two half-sisters and a half-brother.
(13:03):
Just didn't connect to them.
I mean, I'm glad to know they're out there, but I have a family.
So it was like, you know, it was just a little bit like— I felt I had a little guilt about that.
Music.
(13:26):
Okay, let's rewind to what we know of Clay's story. How did Janine come to be?
And how did the 35-year separation happen?
Yes, ma'am. Can you explain? Since you're the only one we've got, explain what happened.
Well, thank you. Men ain't supposed to do this, right? No, men do do that.
(13:50):
Real men do that, so that's okay.
Well, about 32 years ago, I was a military man. and I was stationed in Denver, Colorado. Okay.
And as servicemen do, you meet young ladies and we had an affair.
And so after a period of time, one day she said something to the effect, I think I'm pregnant.
And I said, well, please go to a doctor and you have the doctor confirmed.
(14:11):
And so she came and said, no, everything's fine.
She was not pregnant. She was not pregnant. She had lied to him about being pregnant.
She'd gone to him and said, I think I might be pregnant. And he said,
well, you know, in the video he says, Well, you know, find out, let me know.
And then she came back and said she didn't. And I get why she didn't tell him.
She didn't want to trap him. They weren't in love.
(14:32):
But it's like, you know, he didn't know about me until she called him a year
later to say, well, you do have a daughter.
And so a year later, I had already married and I got a phone call one night
and says, congratulations, you're a daddy. Betty.
So what happened was she had called him after she had given me up and lied and
said, I wasn't sure I'm getting married to this military man. I might keep her.
(14:55):
But I think she wanted him to know that he did have a daughter.
Okay. And by then he had gotten, I think they were married and had a kid on
the way. So it happened all really fast.
My guess is she probably felt guilty because it had been a year.
But at that point, by that time, I was adopted three days out of,
right out of the hospital. Three days, my parents got me.
(15:16):
And she said, well, I have going with the gentleman and the people that I was
with when Janine was born.
Was wanting to take her in for adoption. And I said, well, let me know what you're going to do.
Well, I'm a man. I had a lot of questions about, well, is Janine really mine?
I mean, you know, there's all kinds of things in there. So anyway,
(15:38):
I said, let me know. And so she said, okay.
Well, I never heard from her again. Never heard from the woman again.
Never again. And so as a consequence. Now, all these years, how many years ago? 31.
31 years ago, in the back of your mind, the woman
said she wasn't pregnant and suddenly she is you never
saw the baby it could have been a joke it could
(15:58):
have been any one of a number of things i wonder if i have a child right
exactly and then what and then i had that question for
a lot of years now when she was have been about five years old i'm a little
older i'm a little more mature and i understand what's going on in the world
and i'm packing a lot of baggage because you have that question in the back
of your mind sure so i started looking for and actually i was looking for her
(16:19):
mother because if i could find her where is she?
Right. And so, anyway, I was chasing the dead horse because it turned out,
as I found out last Sunday, Father's Day, that she had been adopted.
And I didn't even know what her name was or anything else. Have you ever found
the woman who was her mother?
Did you, have you, Janine, are you still trying to find her?
(16:42):
I'd love to find her. But you have no idea where she is? No,
the locators are still looking for her.
And we're hoping maybe through the show or something. Dad, what do you think about this?
Music.
Moe did not offer any leads on the whereabouts of Janine's mom.
But she and Clay did not stop looking. And Clay especially was like a dog with a bone.
(17:05):
For 15 years, he continued looking, trying to answer Janine's final question.
It was about 15 years later, you know, I'd had a relationship with them.
And Clay calls me up and says, don't get your panties in a bunch,
but I think we found your mom.
(17:28):
So he had figured out that she had married a military man, and one day he just
Googled him and found out the guy had died, but he had a sister, a twin sister.
And I don't know if he called the sister or how, but somehow he got through
a number to get to Julie, our half-sister, and through there he got Vicki.
He found Vicki, Janine's biological mother, and it wasn't a moment it too soon.
(17:52):
The crazy thing was Vicki had been in the hospital. She had coded, basically died.
There was some told her it wasn't her time. She came back out, went into rehab.
And then the week she got back from rehab was when we, when Clay found her.
So weird. Yeah. And I just go, okay, the universe is just working all over the place. Right, right.
(18:14):
It was, it was pretty amazing. Like we, we found out, like I was talking to
her so much that I got got in trouble with my phone.
I have a phone group. And they're like, okay, we're using too many minutes.
Back in the day where you had to count your minutes. Yeah, exactly.
So it was amazing just getting to know her and finding out I look just like her.
(18:36):
Seriously, when I she sent me pictures of her baby face.
And oh my god, and then we were walking and I could see our legs.
I mean, I got the big hips, you know, and the legs, got the calves.
But yeah, I look just like her. And we have a lot in common.
Like, she loved movies. She loved music.
So we have a lot, a lot in common. Yeah.
(18:59):
We talked for about a month, and nobody knew about it. Nobody knew about it.
You and Vicki talked. Yeah.
Nobody knew about Janine's existence, so it was time for secrets to be forced to the surface.
It took about a month, and I was like, Vicki, you got to tell somebody. You basically died.
(19:19):
Right. If you died, nobody knows I'm here. Right. So she told her best friend,
and then she told, you know, slowly, and finally she told her daughters.
Okay, okay. And Jenny was right away excited about meeting me.
Julie, that's so funny. Julie wasn't. I need to, like, draw a tree right now.
Seriously. I'm on track of everything.
Oh, my gosh. Okay. It's not that complicated. There's just a lot of J names.
(19:44):
So, Dad is Clay. Mom is Vicky.
Janine's half-sisters are Jenny and Julie.
And it turned out that Janine was only the first of Vicky's secrets or untruths to be revealed. old.
It was good getting to know her, but there was a lot of like stuff.
She was emotionally a big mess.
(20:04):
When I met her, we started talking. She had been disowned by her parents when
she married the first time she married out of her faith because she was Orthodox Jew.
And she did not want her daughters to know this. I guess she didn't want them
to know the grandparents had done this.
So she had told them that her parents and sister had died in a car crash. And I did not know this.
(20:29):
Janine did not know this. So first, the secret came to light that she existed.
And then when she connected with her half sisters, another cat was out of the bag.
And so I remember talking to Jenny and saying, you know, that really sucks what they did to our mom.
And she didn't know what I was talking about. It's like, wait,
what are you talking about? I'm like, what are you talking about?
(20:51):
And so the next day, I get a call from Vicki
crying and upset and she's like why did you
tell them i didn't want him to know blah blah i'm like i don't vicky this is
who you are they're gonna understand it's why you know it's like it's it's part
of who you are right and so she told them the truth like and you know jenny
was like she didn't even know they were jewish right you know yeah blood russian jew we're russian jew.
(21:20):
You know, Vicky started telling everybody, and then I got to meet them.
And that was kind of crazy going out there and meeting them.
And, you know, let's look at each, you know, what do we have the same?
You know, Jenny and I look the most alike.
Like, we look like Vicky. And then Julie, she's the youngest.
She looks like her dad. Okay. Yeah.
This is Janine meeting her biological mother, Vicky, in person for the first time.
(21:44):
Oh, wait. Oh, my God. Oh, you're beautiful.
What do you think, you guys? Do we look alike? Definitely.
Nikki, this is going to be on Facebook, so say hi to everybody.
All my friends are going to see it. On Facebook? Yeah, all my friends are going to see it. Hi.
It's like a dream come true. They hug for so long and then lean back slightly
(22:10):
and look at each other, still holding on tight.
Do I look like I thought I would? You look exactly like your pictures, Noah.
Do I? I can see our face shape. It's totally. We have the forehead.
Oh. Wow. I can't believe this day is here. My older daughter. That's right.
(22:34):
They do look alike. I mean, Janine is stylish in a black dress, dark, cute shag hair.
And Vicky's older in a purple sweater, jeans, pixie hair. but they do have the
same big dreamy eyes and little button nose.
Music.
(22:59):
Photos from their lives Janine pulled out a picture from
when she first moved to San Francisco and Vicky responded you
really cut loose didn't you it was a sweet time but even then Vicky wasn't in
the best health so after their visit Janine found ways to connect long distance
I knew she loved movies and she couldn't go to the theaters and so I would do
(23:22):
Bit Torrents you know remember Remember BitTorrents? Yes.
I would download Burn and send her CDs or DVDs so that she could see the movies that were playing.
So I did a lot of that and music.
Yeah. Yeah. Good. So yeah. So we did share that. And I remember when the Oscars
were coming up, we would spend a lot of time talking about the Oscars.
So yeah. So we had a lot of that in common. I think she had a good heart.
(23:46):
I think she was just really broken.
And I think there was some, I don't know. No, the thing is, it's hard to know
what was real because some of the stuff feels like maybe mentally,
emotionally, she was, you know, she had tried to kill herself after she had
her last daughter and was in an institution for a year and had shock treatment.
(24:06):
Oh, God. Yeah. So, I mean, seriously, it was like a lifetime movie.
Seriously, it could be, you know. And I think there might have been some molestation
also that she started remembering from her childhood. Mm-hmm.
There was no diagnosis that you know of as far as mental illness? No.
(24:29):
Vicki passed away not long after that first meeting.
How did you feel when she passed?
It's so different. It's so different, you know, compared to like my mom,
you know, that raised me and was my mom, right? Right.
It's like she was my birth mother. I'm happy I got to know her,
(24:51):
but it was just different.
It's different that it wasn't that intensity that I was kind of more relieved
for her that she's not, you know, because she was on oxygen and,
you know, not doing too good.
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You never really knew her like physically well.
No. Yeah. You know, we spent a lot of time talking.
(25:15):
She was relieved that Vicki was released, and she had her own realization.
You know, after Vicki had called me up that day and was upset that I had told
her daughters, I remember calling my mom crying, going, I'm so thankful.
You know, we had a hard time, mom, but thank you for not lying to me.
Because, you know, and it just, the more I got to know what my life would have
been like, the more I was so grateful for my life.
(25:39):
Music.
Jane also felt good about what she helped to accomplish, opening the windows
of this family, clearing out the secrets, so that Vicki could leave with a clear
conscience and all of her daughters could live authentically,
(26:00):
knowing truly who they are.
So, here I am. You know, Vicki, she's pretty much, she's on oxygen.
She's going to die. She's in hospice. We surprise her for her birthday. day.
I've been so proud feeling like all the lies are out into the,
you know, I've helped bring out, you know, all this truth into the family.
(26:22):
You know, the things that needed to be said were said. And, you know,
and it's like, okay, you know, she can die with a clear conscience. Yeah.
But it turned out that there was more that they didn't know.
Tune in next time for a bombshell discovery and Janine's story.
A story that, of course, is not hers alone, but that of a bloodline.
(26:45):
Michelle comes along and like, hold my beer. Here I am.
So I thought I was the big secret in the family. Nope.
Here I am.
Music.
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