S1 E18 ADHD Women & Gratitude Guilt: Why Thankfulness Feels Hard for the ADHD Brain

Gratitude season hits different when you have ADHD. While the world is shouting “just be thankful,” most of us are stuck juggling overwhelm, rumination, perfectionism, emotional intensity, and a brain that cannot seem to slow down long enough to notice the good stuff.

In this episode, Jess and Jeannine get honest about what gratitude actually looks like for ADHD women not the Pinterest version, not the toxic-positivity version, and definitely not the guilt-tripped version.

From Jess’s real-life run-in with an aggressively cheerful quote at her oncologist’s office, to Jeannine’s abandoned gratitude journal, to the science behind dopamine, serotonin, rumination, micro-gratitude moments, and why joy feels so huge (and so rare) when it finally breaks through this is gratitude told through the lens of real neurodivergent life.

Inside this episode:

• Why gratitude for ADHD brains is awareness, not performance

• The difference between gratitude and toxic positivity

• How comparison, ableism, and internalized shame sneak into “thankfulness”

• What the science says about gratitude, dopamine, serotonin, and ADHD emotional regulation

• Joy as a form of gratitude (hello, “wee moments”)

• Why perfectionism, RSD, and negative self-talk shut gratitude down

• How neuroplasticity supports changing emotional patterns at any age

• Micro-gratitude vs. forced routines and why tiny wins actually work

• Why ADHD women feel undeserving of good things (and how to shift that)

• The emotional power of handwritten letters and intentional connection

Jess and Jeannine keep it real, keep it funny, and keep it grounded in lived ADHD experience. No pressure, no journals required, no guilt if you haven’t felt thankful today. Gratitude isn’t a task it’s a moment. And you deserve to let the good stuff count.

If this episode hit home, share it with someone who gets it. We’re building a space where neurodivergent women can feel seen, validated, and a little less alone.

00:00 – When Gratitude Season Meets ADHD Reality

Holiday pressure, “just be grateful,” and why it doesn’t land for ADHD brains.

01:27 – Toxic Positivity in a Serious Space

Jess’s oncologist-office moment & why forced positivity feels invalidating.

02:21 – Ableism, Comparison, and Misunderstood Gratitude

What gratitude is not — and how comparison hijacks it.

04:33 – The Science: Dopamine, Serotonin & the ‘Wee Moment’

ADHD joy, emotional intensity, and why gratitude hits differently.

07:09 – Perfectionism, Shame Cycles & Feeling Undeserving

How negative self-talk blocks gratitude and keeps ADHD women small.

10:16 – Neuroplasticity & Rewiring Gratitude Patterns

ADHD brains can change — even later in life.

12:06 – Gratitude Letters, RSD & Communicating Love

Why writing feels safer, deeper, and emotionally clearer for ADHD folks.

14:22 – The Shirt Spiral: Perfectionism on Full Display

A relatable, classic Jess story about overwhelm, appearance, and RSD.

17:06 – Gratitude in Chaos: ADHD, Rumination & Emotional Overload

Why pausing is hard, and how ADHD blocks access to positive moments.

26:29 – Micro-Gratitude: Tiny Wins That Actually Work

Realistic, ADHD-friendly gratitude without guilt, pressure, or perfection.

29:12 – A Moment of Gratitude Between Jess & Jeannine

Episode Transcript

(00:02):
in the spirit of Thanksgiving and all the observances that come along with it.
this time of year there seems to be advice that just shows up everywhere.
Just practice gratitude.
Like it's a magic fix for everything, right?
Yeah.
Tell that to my ADHD brain that can't remember where I put my phone.
I once bought a gratitude journal.
I think I wrote in it like twice and then probably lost it under a pile of laundry forlike six months.

(00:28):
Still don't know where that thing is actually.
for today, we're talking about real gratitude.
What it is, why it's important, why it's hard for ADHD brains and how to make it actuallyfeel good instead of forced.
Welcome back to Angry on the Inside.
I'm Jessica.
And I'm Jeannine and we're certified ADHD coaches, but this isn't coaching.
We're not therapists or doctors.

(00:49):
We're women who have ADHD, sharing our experiences and the lives that we've lived.
take what resonates, leave what doesn't.
Just remember you're not the only one who's angry on the inside.
What even is gratitude?
I think of it as awareness and appreciation.
Just noticing and appreciating what's good, big or small, ah even when life's chaotic.

(01:14):
And it's not about ignoring the hard stuff or pretending everything's fine and none ofthat toxic positivity shit.
It's more just saying like, hey, this tiny thing, it went right today and I'm gonna letmyself feel that.
gratitude does not equal toxic positivity.
it's kind of funny because toxic positivity, came up this morning.
I was at my doctor's office at the short stay oncologist office.

(01:37):
And so a rather serious office, right?
And on the backboard, it was quote of the day, talking about, being grateful and havingfaith that everything is going to work out right.
what are you feeling down about?
I don't know.
I'm in the oncologist's office.
So probably some things are going on.
Yeah.
All these people walking in are seeing this freaking quote.
dude now that I think about it, it makes me mad.

(01:57):
And I was thinking, this is sort of toxic positivity.
all work out, but it's not going to be fun.
it's going to be hard.
And what's wrong with acknowledging that?
not hiding the for in that moment.
be grateful for when I go there because most people are amazing I was just saying you knowwith the quote that for sure that just happened to be some toxic positivity that I ran

(02:18):
into today and I was like well that's some random ass shit
Well, I was going to ask, like, what are some ways that you feel you show gratitude?
when you're in the moment.
I do think I think I have gotten a little bit better taking that pause even just kind oftaking that deep breath and of grounding yourself and acknowledging what's going on
recognizing a calm moment within all the chaos I'm not gonna like say my day is great whenit sucks, but recognize that there are moments that I'm grateful for that are good.

(02:49):
Does that make sense?
That makes total sense.
when we're talking about gratitude to me with the gratitude, it's a case of showinggratitude in life, not exactly showing gratitude towards someone else, But taking in the
moment and having gratitude for your life and what's happening in your life.
And this is an interesting moment, too, that we have to make sure that we don't fall intosort of an ableist cycle

(03:15):
We have to make sure we're not saying, oh, well, I'm grateful because thank goodness Idon't have it as bad as them.
That is not gratitude.
That is ableism.
there's a big difference in there.
And we have to make sure that we stay conscious of that because our brains can easilyswitch over to, well, we have it better because it's not as bad.

(03:38):
That's not a signal of gratitude.
That's a signal of,
not healing and not being good enough and not validating your feelings, So total opposite.
if you're going around thinking, oh, I'm so grateful.
I don't have as bad as them if that's the way you look at things, that comparison is guesswhat?
someday they're going to have it better than you.

(03:59):
yeah, it's not a good, yeah.
hadn't thought of, the comparison issue.
Because comparison isn't gratitude either, Comparison is the path to envy.
you might have it better than somebody else, but guess what?
I can guarantee you there's a hundred other people that have it better than you.
if that's the way you look at it, there's always going to be someone who is prettier,smarter, richer, has a better life, has better health, all of that.

(04:24):
So you're right.
You're not, that's not you being grateful for what you have in that moment.
gratitude isn't about ignoring the hard stuff.
It's about letting that good stuff count too.
if gratitude is just noticing what's good, why does everyone say it's so powerful?
when we talk about gratitude practice,
some people might just roll their eyes, Others might take the term seriously, sort ofdepends on the person you're standing in front of, but there is actual science behind it.

(04:56):
studies show it activates dopamine and serotonin, which are the same feel-good chemicalsthat our ADHD brains often run low on.
when I actually take time to notice the good my brain feels like kind of a runaway train Imean, I call it like the wee moment or flitting, you know those are my terms for when I

(05:17):
feel that way because it's like when I'm in the zone and I'm excited and I'm feeling goodI'm just flitting from one thing to the next I'm just so like joyous and there are times I
can wake up in the morning and just be so joyous
I can't even like stand it right.
I am joyous and you know that is the way I am showing my gratitude is through my joy andmy happiness and my energy in that moment and it doesn't happen every day but there are

(05:43):
things that I don't exactly know like how it all connects but for some reason I will sayif gratitude and joy combined together it would be for me when I wake up in the morning
and I have just these amazing days where I feel so good.
and just so thankful to be standing where I'm at.

(06:05):
ah And I want to say too, when we're talking about gratitude practice, and we'rediscussing these studies and what goes on in our brain and we tell ourselves, we've talked
before, like rumination cycles, We know there's proof that if we verbalize what's going onin our heads, we can break a rumination cycle, yes?
So wouldn't it make sense that the way we talk to ourselves can influence

(06:30):
the production of our serotonin and our dopamine and what's going on in our brain.
They also show easy proof that, like watching something on TV, right?
If we see someone fall, we've talked about this, we see someone fall, if we see someoneknocked over, our brains can react in the same way that they would as if it actually
happened to us.

(06:51):
So it's not hard to believe that the same thing can happen, but in a positive way.
in this gratitude practice,
It helps with emotional regulation, It's shifting that focus from what's going wrong towhat's working.
that is good too.
What's going wrong to what's working there's just, there's, there's so many caveats tothis in my opinion, That we miss out on gratitude, our perfectionist cycles, we try to be

(07:22):
perfect.
We try to get all these things right.
We We don't appreciate the errors that we make and that a lot of times errors end upcreating
new ideas, new ways of doing things that have never been done before.
no one would know to do it had they not made the mistakes to start with.
those things are something to be grateful for.

(07:42):
That's something to show gratitude towards, instead, we will go into a doom spiral overthings like that.
learning to do this, it increases self compassion.
And you may be thinking
they're only talking about gratitude because it's Thanksgiving, Gratitude, giving thanks,being thankful, all those things.
But we're also talking about it because it is so easy for us in the neurodiverse communityto be so self-negative.

(08:09):
Negative to the point that we just make ourselves physically sick.
And this, practice, this is part of, what really will build emotional regulation.
it will help to teach you to shift focus and, increasing that, that self-compassion andthat self-love away from self-criticism.

(08:30):
That's huge, huge for me.
And I never realized how incumbent it was and how heavy it was for me to carry around somuch of what I do.
And I truly did feel that I, I thought that I did practice a
Gratitude mindset because I would always you know say, know, thank you and I'm a religiousperson You know spiritual person, know, thank you God for all the things that I have and

(08:58):
all the things that you've done for our family Thank you for all the you know, theblessings that we have all these things but I'm still telling myself.
I'm not good enough.
I'm not making the mark.
This isn't right You know, I shouldn't be standing in this space I'm not meant to stand inthis space all these things
it's just it's absolutely off point.

(09:18):
I'm reading this book currently called The Middle Finger Project.
And she has a section in there about gratitude and what it sort of looks like and howwomen, it is so hard for women to actually experience gratitude, to be even just excited
about so many things because we feel we're undeserving of it.

(09:42):
And I think that's what really can block us in,
and why this is actually just such a real topic that you may not realize is actuallysomething that can impact your life, in getting ready for this episode, Jeannine was far
more, educated about this than me, you know, and us reading up on it and things thatreally just I'm a little bit shocked at the impact that this actually does have on us.

(10:08):
And I, I just hadn't thought
through it at the level that Jeannine was already recognizing it.
it is that rewiring.
mean, you you just, you start to build up that resilience.
um If you can start changing at least some of those thought patterns from being thatconstant self-criticism um to start noticing what you do right, not focusing on those

(10:32):
mistakes.
And with ADHD brains is so easy for us to look at the negative.
especially look at what we think is negative about us, we've always heard and too much,too little, not enough, trying to take a moment to focus on what are the good things?
And even if it was a mistake, sometimes, you look back and it's one of those, if thathadn't happened, way back when, this good thing wouldn't have happened.

(10:56):
And I think what's really awesome about it.
You said, you know, it rewires the thought patterns.
I love that it literally rewires your brain, so many people don't know aboutneuroplasticity.
And though the concept has come across in the last few years, it's definitely been proventhat our brains continue to make new connections and uh new neural pathways our entire

(11:21):
lives.
definitely a case where it is not ever too late to help your brain and help your bodybecome more resilient and more healthy, by actually putting these things in place and
truly starting to feel them.
I was surprised, reading up on this of the, the science, the proof that showing gratitudecan really improve depressive symptoms.

(11:47):
It can shorten the frequency and the duration of a depression episode.
was even reading like writing a gratitude letter to somebody the dopamine effects last forweeks.
um I think again, it's just because you're trying to rewire.
moving away from what's the negative and to what's the positive.

(12:07):
could definitely see that because I have written gratitude letters.
I actually in the last few years I started writing actual handwritten letters into likethe cards that I will send and I actually take the time to really think them through and
write them out and be intentional towards that person ah especially in thank-you notes

(12:29):
Yeah.
It's one of those things I know we're talking about our own personal gratitude, extendingthat gratitude out, I will say that is something that I truly enjoy doing.
though I can't help but hear the person in the back of my head being like, man, I hopethis person doesn't think I'm a fricking weirdo by writing this three paragraph, thing in
the card.
if they do, I won't have to send another card.

(12:49):
there you go.
You won't have to be grateful for them anymore because they'll be gone.
Exactly.
Yeah.
But I think too, our brains when we're focusing on negative stuff, we tend to focus a loton ourselves, which I hate thinking that way because I don't want to...
I feel like I'm not a self-centered person.

(13:10):
And I don't think you can necessarily call it self-centered.
It's just our brains, focus so much on what's going on for us that gratitude letter,you're stepping outside yourself, you're giving your time and yourself to that person,
which I just think is such a gift.
And most of us don't get to hear enough good stuff about ourselves no matter what, youknow?
Yes, we're really hard on ourselves, but think the majority of people are hard onthemselves.

(13:36):
We just have our special way of being hard on ourselves.
I can see where it is stepping outside of ourselves.
think, you know, with ADHD, I know a lot of people feel like we're very much me, me, mepeople, where it's more, at least for me in my perspective, I feel like it's a case.

(13:57):
If I seem like I'm being self-centered, it's because I'm worried about how I'm going toaffect the other person.
I don't, yeah, I don't want to embarrass you.
I don't want to, make you feel like, you have to have embarrassment towards me or like Ishouldn't be standing next to you.
And I understand that's part of the perfectionist cycle, But I do know how it shows up.

(14:18):
um My husband and I, when we were first dating.
I was trying so hard to make a good impression on his family.
And it was a christening or something And I couldn't find a shirt to wear.
And I was so upset because I didn't have a clean shirt.
So I ended up putting on a shirt and then I'm totally paranoid thinking the shirt, I cansmell the shirt.
I'm sure the shirt was fine.

(14:40):
I'm gonna get in the car and we're driving and I'm just all upset and I'm just spiraling.
And he looked over and this is only time he's ever said it.
He looks over and he was like, you know, Jess, it's not all, it doesn't have to be allabout you.
And I remember being so upset because I was like, it's not about me.
I don't care what I wear.
It's about you.
Yeah, exactly.

(15:00):
que RSD for sure.
I was like, I'm trying to do this for you so that you wouldn't be embarrassed of me beingthere.
I'm trying to represent for you.
But that's just not the way it comes across when we communicate it to other people.
And
such a good point too Your perfectionism is so much more about, but I want it to beperfect for you.

(15:21):
And they're like, yeah.
And they don't even notice things that you are working your ass off to do or are worriedabout it.
As you said, yeah.
As he said, like, who wants even going to notice the shirt you're wearing?
know, like you're obsessing about it and probably, yeah, people won't really even noticeit.
Mm-hmm.
No, and I think you know when we do gratitude letters, I think that actually gives us theopportunity to really express to people how we feel I think that a lot of people in the

(15:52):
neurodiverse community do much better when writing something out Because we can edit itand don't be wrong.
We will edit it into infinity but I think that gives us the opportunity to actually Putdown all the thoughts and then sort of sort through them
to express to people, you know, our gratitude, our love, our thankfulness for the way thatthey impact our lives.

(16:14):
And that might be a case that they don't realize or get to see that that is what they do.
maybe the moral to that one is maybe handwrite out a gratitude letter to anotherneurodiverse person that you love.
Because I don't know about you, but if I get a long written note,

(16:37):
I save it because they're few and far between,
it takes practice, it's kind of like the strength training, but the small weights work asmuch as the big You don't have to start out, lifting 20 pound weights.
So can start out lifting one pound weight.
it sounds great in theory um So the tricky part is Actually implementing it

(17:01):
why is it so hard for people with ADHD to actually do this?
I'll just say gratitude can feel impossible when your brain is in chaos.
Same, know, ADHD comes with time blindness.
And I think a lot of times, you know, I can be so focused on what's next and what wentwrong that I don't pause to notice what's good.

(17:26):
And that, that can be a hard
for me and then all of a sudden like things will be in total chaos and then somewhere outof the blue it'll just smack me in the face.
you mentioned time blindness but I think it's about how these things all run together.
got, time blindness, impulsivity, you know, how we're fast.
Our brains are always moving.
It's just, you're right.
It makes it so hard to just pause and reflect and just be focused on that moment.

(17:53):
Cause it seems like we're either freaking out about what comes next or we're freakingabout what just happened and psychoanalysis,
ruminating on, gosh, did I sound as dumb as I think I sounded?
Does that person think I'm dumb because I sounded really dumb?
I think you started to say like cycle analyze ourselves, which I totally do.
we have all read so many frickin books about neurotypical behavior.

(18:17):
And then we read all the books about neurodiverse behavior and we're just looking to seewhere we fit in and we will just, psychoanalyze ourselves into the ground.
And sometimes that's not the greatest thing, We overthink and our brains are alreadywired.
We notice threats and problems, the fight, fight or freeze.

(18:38):
And that rage that can get mixed in, add ADHDs intensity and the positive can feel likebackground noise.
all those challenges, they're just screaming in your face, They're all in the front.
We got to
stick our hands into whatever is solid, Grab onto it and pull it to the front of ourbrains to be able to see the positivity in our lives and understand the gratitude that we

(19:03):
are meant to experience,
just when you're in conversation with somebody is taking the moment to enjoy theconversation, enjoy their company instead of, as I said, still being in your head thinking
what I said a minute ago to that was stupid.
Do they think I'm dumb?
Did that sound weird?
Because right then you're not in that moment, You're going over what had happened and thenmaybe you're figuring out like, well, I should say something to fix it.

(19:29):
So they don't think I'm weird.
I'm not in that moment.
I'm grateful for that moment.
I'm not enjoying that person's company.
I'm not grateful for them.
I'm too busy thinking that they think I'm weird because I said something stupid.
Well, and that's hard to get around and the idea is to lean into our ADHD.
This is one of those things we can lean into.

(19:51):
we don't have to make ourselves small anymore.
And we don't have to make ourselves even palatable.
It's okay to just be you and
And I know that that is one of the hardest things.
I know that I will slip back into masking very easily, but I've reached a point in my lifewhere I'm done making myself small and I'm done feeling like I'm not worthy.

(20:17):
I'm worthy of being happy and I am worthy of getting to enjoy the positives of me
Even in the last few years, I would have been like, oh, I don't want to brag or I don'twant to like throw my stuff around.
You know, screw that.
Screw that.
The only people that don't want to hear about the good things happening to you are theones that are so fucking angry that they can't handle listening to the good things that

(20:44):
are happening to you and you recognizing those positive things and you have ingratitude.
I'm not saying you have to scream it from the rooftops, but I am saying that area of yourlife needs to be a guilt free zone.
Oh, God, that's so true what you just said.
You remind me.
I have noticed about myself.
Sorry, getting off topic.

(21:05):
Is when I'm feeling like envious or jealous or don't like that good stuff, something'sgoing not well in my life.
You know, it's like when I'm focusing, trying to, I'm not happy for a friend becausesomething good happened.
I've always found like when I'm in a really low spot in my life, it's almost like that'show can tell.
If I haven't figured it out, I can tell by how I respond to others.

(21:27):
uh If I don't focus on good stuff for everyone.
Ooh, more things to think about.
Thanks, Jess.
Anytime, Jeannie.
So we know that, you know, emotional dysregulation, rejection, sensitivity, this can alsomake it hard when we're talking about gratitude or the lack of gratitude just because

(21:52):
we're struggling, you know, to actually be able to access it, especially when we'reoverwhelmed.
And when we're overwhelmed is when we are feeling rejected and we are feeling as if wearen't good enough or that we
have messed up or we have embarrassed ourselves or someone else or we've been weird, allof those things, they kind of snowball.

(22:12):
And they really do just all circle back to the same thing, which is that negative internaltalk, which keeps us from being able to experience the positive sides of our brain and the
positive aspects of our lives.
when we check something off that to do list, we don't get that bump of dopamine.
We get a sense of relief.
We don't get a sense of gratitude that it's completed or anything.

(22:35):
We're like, all right, one less thing.
no, here's the new thing.
No, no.
And that's true.
when I had that gratitude journal, I think it was, felt like, I'm supposed to do this.
I'm supposed to be grateful.
Um, and it just started to feel like it was like another thing on my to-do list.
And so then when I would realize, I didn't write my gratitude journal, it was just like, Ifailed again.

(22:59):
I didn't do something again.
I forgot something again.
And
instead of being a positive thing, it was just, guilt and shame spiral like once again, Ididn't do what I was going to said I was going to do.
I forgot about something that I thought was important.
if you went a whole day and you weren't grateful That's okay.
Tomorrow's the next day.

(23:20):
I think that with the gratitude journal, my oppositional demand defiance would probablykick in and I'd be like, bitch, don't tell me what to do.
You know, either that or I'd
Don't give me that prompt.
I don't want to write about this.
That's stupid.
I'd be like, there's a whole page.
Now have to do the page.
And then I start to write and then I make a mistake and I'd like, no, Whiteout is going tofix this shit.
And then it'd be ruined.
The journal would be ruined in my brain.

(23:41):
which is, you know, awesome.
But this is where my brain sits.
Right.
And it's okay to talk about it.
It's okay to like admit we don't get it right.
You know, there's just things that we have to learn.
Like
Learning to give up on certain shit.
You don't have to finish everything.
And you don't have to be ashamed of not finishing it.

(24:02):
It's okay.
It's alright to have an afghan that's been sitting there for 15 years.
As long as you've got the yarn sitting there too.
Hey.
Whose business is it?
Somebody else will pick that shit up later.
It's okay to start a gratitude journal and stop it.
Because it wasn't working for you.
Right?
You've got to do what Find your own joy.

(24:24):
maybe it'll work for a little bit.
And then your brain will be like, yeah, it's not new and exciting anymore.
So you'll find a different way of doing it,
See, that is one of those things I think, a lot of people don't realize or remember, ormaybe they realize after they get their ADHD diagnosis is they try to do all of these
things, then the dopamine's gone and they're like, but it was working before, but it'sokay that it doesn't work now.

(24:44):
If you go in knowing it's only going to work for a while, don't be ashamed when you haveto quit it.
All those bullshit lines, quitters never quit.
Yeah.
Whatever.
Or white winners never quit or whatever.
Whatever.
If putters don't quit, they're not quitters.
I know.

(25:05):
that when understanding ADHD is so important because then you know, chances are reallygood that your brain is going to, you're going to be great with a Genet Granted to Journal
for a week, two weeks, a month, two months.
But you know what?
Most likely at some point your brain's going to be like, yeah, not so much anymore.
And that's okay.

(25:26):
That's just how your brain works.
And you just, you go into it knowing that, you know what?
This journal is working well for me.
And, but maybe in two months it's not.
And then I'll just find, find another way to do it.
And that's okay.
freeing to just be chill about some shit like that where like you reach a certain pointand you're just like, meh, okay, it's okay.

(25:50):
that feeling of being perceived like, oh god, somebody's gonna see that writing journal onmy nightstand and know that I haven't touched it because it has three inches of dust on
it.
it really is just about finding how do I do it in a way that works with my brain for thismoment because my brain might decide later it doesn't like it but for right now what
what's working what's doable.

(26:12):
it's not that ADHD brains are ungrateful, but our brains are pretty busy just trying tosurvive half the time.
It's in there somewhere.
It's just lost all the noise,
So I guess the thing is trying to figure out is, what does gratitude look like when we doit in a way that actually works with our brain?
how do we make gratitude
feel doable?

(26:33):
forget the whole perfect, morning routine.
It's finding something that works for you that feels natural.
I don't think of being really grateful when you feel like it's pushed upon you or you'refeeling forced, That doesn't seem very grateful.
So find out what just feels right for you at that time.

(26:54):
we can redefine what it means to practice gratitude small flexible realistic
a micro gratitude moment, even what's one good thing that happened today.
And it could be something Like I knew where my keys were today.
I made it out the door on time.

(27:16):
I know.
I always get the micro and the macro like flipped around.
That's always driven me crazy.
Micro and macro.
It's like transparent and translucent.
Oh, that one too, it gets me.
I think yeah, if anybody's ever had a transparent pudding holler at your girl
sorry.

(27:39):
discussing getting into this gratitude mindset, we're also sort of talking aboutoffsetting some of this negative, repetitive or negative repetition we get in our brains,
gratitude isn't a checklist.
It's just a moment for connection.
that's why we say at the beginning, take what works and leave the rest because we truly dobelieve that Our entire worlds are a spectrum disorder nonstop.

(28:05):
We are all extremes in different ways.
We're all affected in different ways, but we all have a commonality.
So it's not about forcing it.
It's about catching the moments when you feel it.
It's about recognizing the feeling.
about experiencing the feeling without guilt, welcoming the feeling and knowing that it'sa positive thing.

(28:26):
what we're saying here isn't an absolute, but it is a positive perspective to have formost days.
And sometimes those things that you're grateful for is that the day may have beenhorrible, but at the end of it, you were still here.
And sometimes that's that in and of itself is enough to

(28:51):
give grace and gratitude, for the day.
it doesn't mean every single day is going to be in the way that you want it to be or thatit won't be so terrible that you don't want to think of something gratitude wise.
But we want to make sure that you know that even though it's not an everyday thing, it isa obtainable thing.

(29:12):
Okay, so moment of truth, Jess, what's one thing you're grateful for today?
I'm grateful for you.
I knew you were going to say that.
I'll tell you the 50 reasons why you shouldn't be grateful for me.
Don't you see all my flaws?
I do see all of your flaws, and I am grateful for you.
guys Jess is one of the sweetest people I've ever met.

(29:32):
was gonna say I am thankful for you Jess, but I'm also thankful I got a new kitty.
So yeah, he's very sweet.
because I get to experience happiness through you and your kitty video.
Well and kitties are like, this little kitty is like so full of joy, so happy, so yeah.

(29:53):
Didn't we all start out that way?
Anyway, we digress.
Alright, gratitude doesn't fix ADHD, but it helps us to see ourselves through a kinderlens.
at the end of the day, life is messy.
The hard stuff and the good stuff can coexist.
Doesn't have to be the black and white.
We can live in that gray.

(30:15):
I want to encourage everyone to try just a small gratitude habit.
No journals required.
And if there is a way that you practice gratitude,
please drop it in the comments.
We want to hear everyone's stories.
We want to start to learn and know our audience and get to experience life with you aswell.
if this episode hit home, share it with a friend who gets it.

(30:37):
gratitude isn't about fixing your ADHD, but it's about noticing that you're alreadyenough.
Thanks for listening.
We're 18 episodes in follow us, listen to us on all major streaming platforms, we'll seeyou next time.
Ding ding ding.