BeTempered Episode 57 – From the Sidelines to the Frontlines of Education with Carl Rhinehart lll - BeTempered

Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hi, my name is Allie Schmidt.
This is my dad, Dan.
He owns Catron's Glass.

Speaker 2 (00:04):
Thanks, allie.
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(00:26):
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Speaker 3 (00:30):
Welcome to the Be Tempered Podcast, where we
explore the art of findingbalance in a chaotic world.

Speaker 4 (00:35):
Join us as we delve into insightful conversations,
practical tips and inspiringstories to help you navigate
life's ups and downs with graceand resilience.

Speaker 3 (00:44):
We're your hosts, Dan Schmidt and Ben Spahr.
Let's embark on a journey tolive our best lives.
This is Be Tempered.
What's up everybody?
Welcome to the Be Temperedpodcast, episode number 57.
57?
I feel like we just did 56.
It's like yeah, like a minuteago.

(01:04):
Hey, today we're honored to sitdown with a man whose life is a
living testimony to the ideathat service is leadership and
that impact starts right whereyou are.
Carl Reinhart III is a husband,a father, a mentor, educator
and community builder.
A proud graduate of EarlhamCollege with a degree in

(01:25):
business and nonprofitmanagement and an MBA to match.
Carl has called Richmond,indiana, home since 1999.
But more than just plantingroots here, carl has poured into
his community with a servant'sheart and a vision for change.
From his early work inbehavioral mental health with
youth and families to hiscurrent role as career and

(01:46):
technical education teacher atRichmond High School, carl has
always believed in liftingothers up, especially the next
generation.
He co-founded Future Achievers,a nonprofit dedicated to
empowering local youth with thetools, knowledge and
opportunities they need tothrive.
He also created CARE andopportunities they need to
thrive.
He also created CARE Child andAdult Resource and Education to

(02:10):
help families overcomesystematic challenges and stay
connected.
Whether he's serving on theboard of Natco Credit Union,
working as the chief doingofficer of the Wayne County
CARES, or opening the doors atOak Park Pentecostals, where he
leads the First Impressions teamand Emergency Warming Center,
carl lives by one simple butpowerful belief Everyone

(02:33):
deserves the opportunity to betheir best self.
Carl doesn't just talk aboutchange, he builds it.
One relationship, one program,one purpose-filled step at a
time.
Carl, welcome to the BeTempered Podcast.

Speaker 5 (02:51):
Man appreciate it, man Appreciate it.
Happy to be here, Honored.

Speaker 3 (02:54):
Yeah, we appreciate you taking the time out of your
day and out of your summervacation.
You've got your daughter overthere joining us and checking in
on you, but we appreciate youtaking the time to come in and
share your story, cause I knowit's a powerful one.

Speaker 5 (03:07):
Oh man, my pleasure, my pleasure, I just man hope and
pray.
Yeah, absolutely that it's, uh,it's, it's, uh, it has an
effect, you know, on somebody.
Somebody it's benefits,somebody, that's uh.
That's the point of it all manFor sure.

Speaker 3 (03:21):
every podcast learning about childhood where
you grew up.
So where did you grow up?

Speaker 5 (03:28):
Grew up in Muncie, indiana.
So, and before I get too deep,man, I just I want to give honor
to God, you know, for thisopportunity.
This is a tremendous blessingfor me.
I believe this podcast is atremendous blessing for our
community and for everyone thatgets to hear it.
I have just been man, justoverjoyed.

(03:52):
Every time I plug into anotherepisode, whether I'm cutting
grass or I'm at the gym, I'mlistening to the podcast and
hearing these stories, and Ibelieve that this is exactly
what people need to hear at thisparticular time.
And so, to see you all doingthis work, man, and just to hear
the stories of faith and frompeople that we know but we don't

(04:14):
always get to have thisconversation and so, and just
even you know, coming in herethis morning and hearing a
little bit of folks' backgrounds, man, it's just, it's powerful
to see God moving, and that'sthe only reason why I'm sitting
in this chair, that's the onlyreason why I do, uh, am able to
do what I do is because of ofGod's grace, and so, um, and any

(04:36):
takeaway from today, it's Iwant people to know that God's
grace is enough.

Speaker 3 (04:43):
For sure.
Yeah, amen to that, and thankyou for saying that.
We, you know that's our wholegoal is to share these stories
because, um, you know, we justdid an interview here prior to
you showing up, and a lot ofpeople have been through a fire,
right, and that's kind of thewhole premise of be tempered.
But it's amazing to me howalmost every person that we

(05:06):
interview chooses to go into thefire, which is amazing because,
you know, a lot of people areafraid of failure.
They're they're afraid of youknow what's this person going to
think of me?
But once they go through thosechallenges and those those
obstacles that come up in theirlife and they get through them,

(05:26):
they're so much stronger for it,Absolutely so.
Appreciate you saying that.
So back to Muncie, Indiana, yep.

Speaker 5 (05:33):
Yep, muncie, indiana.
Yeah, grew up, um there, uh,born and raised, graduated
Muncie central high school.
Uh, proud bear cat class of1999.
Man grew up with both parents,period of time that my dad
wasn't in the home for a littlebit.

(05:53):
One of six kids from my family,so we got a baby of the group.
So that might show itself atsome point, so that might show
itself at some point some ofthose characteristics of being
the youngest in the family.

(06:13):
But but, man, as I reflect back,a lot of good times.
There were some struggles there, you know for sure.
Just like you know, anybody youknow dealt with some
dysfunction in the home.
My dad struggled with alcoholand drugs, and so, again, you
know, there's a period of timehe wasn't, he wasn't around for
a little bit.
Abuse, you know, in the home,domestic violence, those type of

(06:36):
things you know have seencoming up, you know, but with
that there's a lot of good andthere was a lot of love.
You know as well too, but withthat there's a lot of good and
there was a lot of love as welltoo.
And again, man, just by thegrace of God, and as you say,
running people that run to thefire and I was thinking, as you
were saying that that that's notalways easy, and just because

(07:02):
people are going to the fire,that doesn't mean they
necessarily want to.
You know, either I think itjust for some people or at least
for me it just came to asituation where there's there
was just no other way to go.
I mean, turning back and goingthe opposite direction just just
really wasn't an option, didn'tseem like the right thing to do
.
So it's to it's to push forwardand I would say too, growing up

(07:25):
, I've been blessed to be ableto see both sides Right, and so
I saw the struggles of my dadand others, you know, in the
community or in my family, andsome of the things that they
struggled with but then also hada lot of.
My mother was, is still, a greatwoman of faith.
My grandmother grandmothers,you know, great women of faith
prayed often and over us.

(07:47):
I remember my mom coming in,you know, at night and praying
over me as a child, you know,making sure that I went to
church every Sunday.
That was just.
There was no negotiation aboutthat.
This is what you're going to do.
So, you know, for me, coming up, I always had both vantage

(08:08):
points right, I always, and justlike all of us, but for me
especially, god allows us tochoose, you know, and so it
wasn't always the straight andnarrow for me.
I went to the right little bit,went to the left and then came
back, but again, you know,because of the grace of God and
just his goodness, I mean, hereI am today and I've got people

(08:29):
that you know read beautifulintros and bios like, uh, like
you did for me and and havegotten some accolades, but uh,
but it's, it's not.
It's not me, you know, it's,it's all him.

Speaker 3 (08:39):
So but yeah, that's it.
That's amazing because, you'reright, there's a lot of people
that when they grow up, they'vegot they've got this guy on this
side of their shoulder and thisguy on this side of their
shoulder and they've got achoice to make, right, and?
And we all nobody's perfectright we all make mistakes and
you learn from those mistakes,like you said.
And, and a lot of times youlearn from other people's

(09:02):
mistakes, you know, and maybethose are family members and
maybe those are friends, maybemaybe that's you, you know, and
so, um, you know, thank you forsharing that about your family.
So you kind of go throughchildhood, talk about high
school a little bit, becausesports became something for you
that was impactful, right?

Speaker 5 (09:20):
Yeah, yeah, I played football, um, ever since
football, ever since middleschool.
You know, I'd say too that theyoung years, I mean we're trying
times.
I don't remember a lot of itand I don't know if that's
trauma related and just tryingto repress some stuff.
I don't know if it's.
You know, 19, 20 year oldactivities, you know, kind of

(09:44):
taking over and clouding somethings.
But a lot of my memories arejust flashes.
You know moments, kind ofmoments in times, little things
here and there.
But you know, one of the thingsI do remember is just, you know,
growing up, for sure, I justwas not sure of myself.
You know really who I was orwhat I was doing, wasn't, didn't
have a lot of confidence.
I was always a big guy.

(10:05):
I was a big kid man.
I was too big to play PopWarner, which was like our
peewee football.
You know his hub here, but youknow, so I remember vividly as a
kid in the barbershop.
You know that's where I grew up.
My dad worked there.
My grandparents started it, youknow, and I remember my dad
made me call the YMCA to see ifI could sign up for Pop Warner.

(10:27):
So I used the pay phone in thecorner and called myself.
I'm elementary school, I don'teven know what age, but young
and I remember they asked me howmuch I weighed and I told them
and they said no, you can't play, you're too big.
They said you might fall onsomebody and hurt them.
So you know other guys that Icame up playing with.
They got to play, you know, butI didn't.
I had to wait till middleschool.
So so yeah, it started inmiddle school.

(10:50):
Man had a, had a great time,enjoyed it in the sense that you
know, middle school we werevery successful, I can proudly
say Northside Titans, ourseventh grade year we went
undefeated and unscored on, oh,wow.
And then, eighth grade year, wecame back and went undefeated,
wow.

(11:10):
And then some years back, hereI went, I was at the high school
, I think it's 21.
I made it to the middle schooland they've got a football that
has that commemorated on it in atrophy case.
There was there in the lobby.
So that was kind of cool,that's really cool.

Speaker 3 (11:25):
That's pretty cool.
Do you remember when you madethat phone?
You obviously remember makingthe phone call.
Do you remember how it made youfeel?

Speaker 5 (11:33):
Oh, man, just less than, and just you know, because
I didn't know, you know my size.
I didn't pay any attention orrealize I just ate.
You know, I guess what wasthere.
I didn't pay any attention orrealize I just ate.
You know, I guess what wasthere.
And I remember, yeah, pleadingwith him on the phone like hey,
ok, like, like, please, let meplay, I can lose the weight,

(11:53):
I'll lose the weight.
But they were like no, no.
The other thing in that I thinkthat's important to my story is
that I started out playingfootball because my dad played,
and so my dad played high schoolfootball.
He played a year of college atBall State, but didn't finish,
or at least attended but didn'tfinish.

(12:14):
But I remember hearing hisfootball stories all the time,
all the time and guys would comein the barbershop man and he'd
be telling these stories andthey would co-sign him and talk
just about how mean he was.
And we, I remember watchingfootball games with my dad and
and it was, it was like he wasin the game.
I mean, next thing, you know,he'd jump up and he's going

(12:36):
through different moves and herethis is how you forearm shiver.

Speaker 1 (12:39):
He's punching walls and all kinds of stuff.
I'm like what the heck.

Speaker 5 (12:43):
So so he was.
You know he was into it and Ihad the size right and so I was
big.
So I'm like shoot you get, youknow, you got to do something.
You know, um, and I'm from typeof family angle just sit around
, you know, and do nothing.
So, uh, you know, put this sizeto good use.
And so football, you know,football was it?
So um, but yeah, so, so I thinkyou know it set me back a

(13:05):
little bit, you know, because Iwasn't 100 percent set on it at
first.
I was just kind of walk again.
I mean this is I had neverplayed.
You know pop war.
And then going into middleschool, and then I hear this
from somebody and then you knowthe pressure of my dad and
feeling like I'm letting himdown if I don't get to play, if
I'm not able to play, you knowand kind of what that means.

(13:26):
Yeah, so yeah.

Speaker 3 (13:28):
Yeah, I mean, you know we coach youth sports and
and you know so many kids well,even if you watch the high
school, kids lack confidence.
You know and, and you know Ican't imagine being a kid making
a phone call to I think I wantto play football cause my dad
did, and then they'd say, no,you're too big.
You know and and how that wouldmake you feel and what that

(13:49):
would do to your confidence.
But sounds like you were ableto persevere through that.
And then you guys kick somebutton and middle school and so
you get through middle school.
Were there any coaches alongthe way there that that really
helped to influence you?

Speaker 5 (14:03):
in those young years, the way there that really
helped to influence you in thoseyoung years.
Oh man, you would say that.
Oh man, coach Frank was ourmiddle school coach and I can
almost see him.
He passed away, I believe, andman, but this is just, and I
don't even know how old Coachwas when we played man, but this
guy was just tall and stockyand just well put together man,

(14:23):
but he was just a great guy.
And our assistant coach, I wantto say Springer, comes to mind.
Somebody's going to have tofact check me on this, but
Springer is what's coming tomind.
I hope that's his name.
Apologize for forgetting, butagain, just two great guys.
I mean that really, I think,you know, really encouraged us

(14:45):
and had great attitudes on thefield, and we're just great guys
you know to be around.
And one thing I'll say too youmentioned, you know, players
lacking confidence.
You know I came from up in atime or from you know.
I realize now that some of whatI experienced, the negative I
experienced, you know I was suchthat like for my dad, for

(15:09):
instance, I mean he didn't growup the greatest either, you know
.
And so some of what probably Ireceived, or some of what kids
are receiving is what's beenpassed down, and so I've learned
this over the years and I evenask you know kids that I work
with now, or tell them this whenI work with them now, like hey,
over the years.
And I even ask you know kidsthat I work with now, or tell
them this when I work with themnow, like hey, if you feel like
your parents or somebody in yourlife, an adult, is mistreating

(15:29):
you or disrespecting you orbeing mean to you, imagine, can
you imagine, like, what theirchildhood was like, who was
there for them, who loved onthem?
You know, I mean, I remember,you know things like you know my
dad, um, you know, sayingcoming up, you know, when he was
a kid, like nobody ever toldhim they loved him.
You know, and so that you know,and, and to hear him when he

(15:50):
said that, like you can look athis face and you can see the
pain or the struggle of whatthat you know going through.
You don't, maybe you don'trealize it, but later on in life
you're like man, that thatwould have really meant
something.
You know, no, I never got that,and so I think that's important

(16:11):
for us to remember and I think,too, with that.
We have to speak life, you know,to people and I'm learning this
with my own, with my own kidsand with my daughter, who's
sitting out outside the studio,and I've got two other two boys
behind her.
But I have to get better atspeaking life to them,
encouraging them as theystruggle and, at seven years old
, you know, having a hard timeinstead of saying all the time

(16:34):
why don't you do this right?
Why couldn't you do that right?
Why are you upsetting me,you're hurting me, you're this,
you're that man.
I got to change it and say, hey, you know, why are you doing
this?
Because you're better than this, you know.
You're a leader, you'reimportant, you're loved.
You're not supposed to behave,you know, in this way.
I know you can do better.
I'm proud of you.

(16:54):
I want to see we're going tohave a great day today, you know
, and sometimes I think thattakes energy.
Yeah, you know, to do, you haveto and in the classroom I've
experienced this as well tooLike that takes effort, you know
, and energy.
That sometimes, for you know, wedon't feel like we have it to

(17:15):
give right.
And then again, thinking back,and I'm thinking of a whole
generation of people who justcame up the hard way, came up in
hard times, and you're workinga job trying to make ends meet.
Ends aren't quite meeting.
You've got these otherstruggles, you've got habits
that you're dealing with.
You just have life bearing downon you and you need or these

(17:39):
souls in your home need thispositivity from you, and you
feel like you don't have it togive.
There's just so much stressthere's.
There's your childhood traumathat you never overcame.
You know that's that'saffecting you as well too, and
so, unfortunately, at thatmoment, you know you don't, you
don't really have it to give.
And so for me and I'll comeback to this probably later, but

(18:01):
that's where grace comes in,and for me, that's what I've
learned is to extend this graceto people, to say, hey, I get it
, and we're not excusing it orsaying that it's okay, but we're
saying that, man, I understand,you know, and I can empathize,
you know, with it as well too.

Speaker 3 (18:17):
Yeah, so important, and I think not only when you
change how you say things tokids, but I think it's very
important to be intentional,Absolutely.
And how you say it, you know,don't just, don't just be
encouraging, like truly mean it,like look them in the eyes and
say, hey, you were born to dosomething great.

(18:38):
So what are you going to dotoday to help to get you to the,
to where you, where I know youcan go and be intentional when
you say that, because the kidsare watching.
You know if you've, if you'resaying that while you're looking
on your phone that's not beingintentional, right so?
I think that's important for allparents, for all leaders, for
all coaches uh, anybody outthere working with our youth and

(18:59):
even as adults, right, I meanwe all, we all struggle.
You know we have good days andbad days, and so it's important
to have those conversations andand be encouraging.
So that's, that's a greatmessage, man.
For sure, for sure.
So you, you're in high school.
Talk about high school a littlebit, yeah.

Speaker 5 (19:17):
High school, again one of those.
But, man, I just the flash ishere and there of high school,
unfortunately, um struggled, Ithink, again with confidence
issues.
You know size, and I grew up ina strict home as well, so I
didn't get to do a lot of thingsthat other students, other
young people, got to do, myfriends got to do, you know.
They'd go to parties or they'dhang out, you know, at night and

(19:39):
things like that, and that justwas not happening in the
Reinhardt home.
That kind of stuff was notallowed.
So so I was a little, you know,disconnected.
School, though, was my safespace, school was, although I
didn't lock in on the books likeI should have and could have.

(20:00):
School is is where I felt safehome.
Home was not it, unfortunately,and so, and even definitely
like in elementary school years,man, I couldn't wait to get to
school to be able to get awayfrom and just get a break from
some of the drama that was goingon outside.
But you know, looking back,it's funny.
I was thinking about this man.
Some years back I came acrossmy yearbook from high school, my

(20:24):
senior yearbook, and I'mreading, looking through the
pages, man, and then you know,back then you know, we used to
have, you know, our friends andeverything, sign our yearbook
and they, you know, all day, andI'm looking at it and I'm like
man, I had quite a fewsignatures.
You know, in this funny story Iremember one time I think I

(20:47):
looked, I was wondering like Iwonder if she could still got
this number, yeah, so I mean.
So, looking back again, I meanso, you know, even though I
didn't realize it in the moment,I could, yeah, it was there.
You know I had people, you know, that cared about me and and
friends and especially on thefootball team and guys that I
played with and are cool to thisday.

(21:08):
If I was to see them we don'tkeep in touch, but if I was to
see them, I know right now we'dshake up and embrace and how you
doing, how's the family, this,that and the other, and that's
awesome.
We didn't win as much on thefield as we had hoped to.
And again, football, althoughit was tough for me again

(21:31):
because I still played for mydad.
It was a lot of him kind ofpushing and talking it up, and
so that's why I was really there.
I hated football practice witha passion.
I didn't like the sweat.
So why are you playing a sportand you don't like to sweat,

(21:51):
right?
But no, I mean I just it.
Just I just did not like that,right, it just got on my nerves,
it was a pain and so.
But what I've learned throughthis, and you know, it's about
attitude and about how youapproach thing and about and
about your thoughts and how ithas and the power that it has.
And since then I've learned toovercome that and to change my

(22:12):
thinking and to change myattitude.
Because what I didn't knoweither, I see, I didn't know
really how good I was or howgood I could be as well too.
And this question kind of gotposed to me and I said the
reason why is because sometimesyou know, in the same breath or
in the same conversation, Iwould get talked up but kind of
getting torn down at the sametime, and so and I can see that

(22:36):
you know, with kids and with mykids, you know as well too.
Again, how are you talking tothem and being intentional, like
what is your purpose?
If I'm trying to build you upand let me build you up and let
that be the conversation, butoftentimes I felt like there.
I mean we would have games andwe didn't win, you know.
But during the game, or at ahalftime or right at the end,

(22:56):
you know my dad would come inhey, man, good, did a great job,
man Y'all lost.
Man, you played hard, you didgreat.
Man, y'all had a loss, but man,you played hard, you did great.
Well, then, by the time we gethome and unfortunately you know
he had a few more drinks, youknow, then it was man, you know
he'd talk about the loss and howbad that was.
And I would just remember, justsitting there, they're standing,
actually he's sitting down.

(23:17):
I'm standing there and I'mlistening to this and I'm in my
head, I'm thinking what the heckis going on.
Did I do good or did I not?
Was this a good experience orwas it not?
Like I'm so confused right now,and so that was.
That was hard, you know.
But again, you know he tried.
I mean, he wouldn't, man.
I think about the movie Rocky,love, love that movie.

(23:40):
It's one of the greatest everinspirational movies.
And I felt like Rocky sometimeswhen my dad would wake me up at
six o'clock in the morning andbe like let's go, we're going
for a run, and I'm like what?
Six am.
I don't want to go for a run, Idon't want to run, like I don't
like running, but you know he'dget me up and man, and you know

(24:08):
again, there was moments youknow he would try but yeah, and
so the confidence issue was achallenge, you know, for me, you
know in high school, butdefinitely some good times
Should have got involved in morethings than what I did.
I played in the band, playedsaxophone and was pretty decent.
Played saxophone and was prettydecent.
There again could have beenbetter, but just didn't really
know.
You know how good I was in themoment and that right coaching

(24:35):
and training and opportunities,you know are key as well too.
And so, you know, felt likesometimes didn't quite have
enough of that to really help meto really lock in and devote
myself like I should have.

Speaker 3 (24:48):
Well, I think you made an important point there
that I don't even know that youknow you made where you talked
about.
You know how you'd come off thefield and your dad would praise
you and tell you how good youdid, and then you know you get
home after you had a couple ofdrinks and it would switch.
I hope that there's parents outthere because, again, we coach
you sports and we see it whereyou can tell if a kid has

(25:10):
struggled during the game or welost.
The first thing the parentsdoing is why'd you do this,
why'd you do that, why'd youmake that pass?
Why didn't you shoot this or dothat?
Or what coach tell you to dohere?
What?

Speaker 5 (25:23):
you don't need any of that.

Speaker 3 (25:25):
Just be encouraging to those kids.
You know, in our case we'retalking about fourth graders.
Yeah, you know talking aboutfifth graders, sixth graders.
These kids just want to havefun.
Yeah, it's okay to push themand and to try to encourage them
to be better and and show themhow to work and to do things.
But, man, after the game, justbe encouraging you know, hey,
you did a great job.
I'm proud of you.

(25:45):
Can't wait to see what you donext week.
Yeah, and so that's importantbecause it's conflicting, right,
and that's where, again,confidence is a huge thing for
these young kids.
And and look at where yourconfidence was.
And if it would have beendifferent if that second half of
your dad wouldn't have came outand said, you know, started
questioning things indifferent,if that second half of your dad
wouldn't have came out and said,you know, started questioning

(26:06):
things, um, maybe you'd havepushed a little harder.
Maybe, you know you, you couldhave, could have been more than
what you were, um, so that's animportant point, yeah, yeah sure
, absolutely.

Speaker 5 (26:17):
And I again, I think, the intentionality of things
you know.
So if, if you want them to bebetter, you know, provide those,
you know, try to provide thoseopportunities, you know, be
there for them.
You know as well A lot, youknow for me.
You know a lot I did on my own,and it's a good thing.
I mean you want to teach yourkids to be independent, you want
to teach them to be responsible, you want to teach them how to
communicate, you know.

(26:38):
But you know making that phonecall, you know.
As an elementary school student,you know elementary age and
having to navigate thoseemotions, you know, on my own, I
signed up for camps, you know.
After that, you know, on my own, whereas, you know, other kids
were going to these big namecamps.
They knew about them.
You know I went to the localcamps, I went to the free camps,

(27:02):
you know, because that's whatour means would allow us, you
know, to afford, or that's all Iknew about.
I didn't have transportation, Icouldn't get to, you know.
And dad worked, I mean dadworked, you know he was a barber
.
My childhood Worked in afactory before that, and so you
know, I mean so he had hisresponsibilities, you know.

(27:23):
But I mean for him to answer.
I guess really, you know, couldhe have done more, could have
done it differently, but again,I'm not bashing him at all and
love my dad and appreciate whathe was able to do, you know,
because I think that's the key.
I mean, I think he did what hewas able to do, I think he did
what he knew to do and, to bequite honest and I've told this

(27:51):
to kids too I think my dadprobably did more for me than
what his dad did for him or wasable to do for him.
And so, although we feel likein the moment, we feel beat down
, we feel like, you know this,it's not getting any better.
You know it actually is, andwith every generation, and so
I'm going to be able to do more,you know, you know for my kids,
and so I'm going to be able todo more, you know, you know for

(28:12):
my kids, as long as I stay, youknow, on the right path and be
intentional and learn from thesethings, and that's something
that's key for me.
I remember my grandma, my dad'smom and she is a man, she was a
handful said what she meant andmeant what she said, right or
wrong.
She was a handful, said whatshe meant and meant what she
said, right or wrong.
But I always remember talkingto her or sometimes and
complaining about my dad andjust telling grandma man, dad
did this and dad did that.
And she'd tell me hey, wait aminute, hold up.

(28:33):
First thing she says that's myson.
You know you ain't gonna talkabout my son like that.
And then, second, you know I'dbe like well, when I get old,
I'm not going to do this, I'mnot going to do that.
She said well, you be careful.
Saying what you're not going todo, she said that'll be the
very thing you end up doing.
And she was not lying.
And so you know, one of mystruggles later in life is that

(28:54):
I had this moment where I lookedat myself in the mirror and I
said the person that my dad wasand all the things that I said I
didn't like about him.
I ended up following in thosesame footsteps and the problem
is is because when you have thatwrong attitude and you've got
that wrong mindset, you focus onthe negative and all you're
doing is you're pointing thefinger at that person and you're
looking.
Well, you shouldn't do that andyou shouldn't do this, and this
is bad and it's bad, but youdon't take any time to learn.

(29:14):
Ok, then, what's on the otherside of that coin?
No-transcript muscle memorykind of that you have, and

(29:37):
that's you know what you end updoing until, hopefully, you wake
up and realize you're in thewrong spot and then so you then
start this journey ofself-discovery to chart a new
path for yourself.

Speaker 4 (29:49):
That's all I was about to say.
The self-discovery,self-reflection type thing,
cause you know you think aboutit.
I know you said your dad wasn'tthere for a little while but
let's say 15, 14 years of yourlife.
If he was there, that's 14years that you were sitting

(30:09):
there and that's what you saw.
That's, that's what's in yourmind, that's how you know you
react.
So if you don't have thatself-reflection, you know you're
just going to turn into itabsolutely.

Speaker 5 (30:13):
Oh, and right or wrong I mean right or wrong I
know my dad.
If my dad wasn't there, oh man,I had to try to run all over my
mom right now.
She, she was no pushover, she,she had some moments where she
switch flipped in her and shewent from nice sweet church mom,
sunday school teacher to, oh myGod, I'm terrified of this

(30:36):
other person.
I'm not going to cross her.
But yeah, he provided.
He provided all the structureyou know, in the home, a lot of
the discipline, you know, but,but he kept me, you know, in the
straight and narrow and a lotof that was, you know, to.
His message was I don't wantyou to make the same mistakes
that I did, and that's the rightthing to say.
You know, I don't, I don't wantyou to go down the same path

(30:56):
that I did.
And even in the midst of ofsome of his, you know, darkest
moments, it's like you see whatI'm doing, you're not going to
do this same thing.
And that's one thing that Irelish about him and about his
character and what he did for meand what, as we talk about
other kids, maybe, what they'renot getting, I mean adults,

(31:24):
parents.
We make mistakes.
We have our own issues, ourdemons, our habits, but we have
to be telling our kids you aregoing to be better than me,
You're not going to make thesame mistakes that I made.
Instead of, I think sometimeswhat we have is we have adults
that are looking at kids andtell them hey, I'm not anything
important, I didn't make it inlife and so you're not going to
make it either.
You're not going to go far.
And that was not my dad at all.

(31:46):
Uh, man, he, he talked me up.
Uh, I had a moment he used totell me when I was as a kid and,
you know, even older, he's like, man, you're gonna be the first
black mayor of Muncie.
That's what he kept telling me.
You'll be the first black mayorof Muncie.
And I'm like whatever, whatever, you know and you know.
And then I had a moment I ranfor city council in 2024.
And so I thought, man, and Icried and I thank God.

(32:08):
I was like because I didn't win.
I said, but had I have won?
You know, dad, talking that up,and I could have done that, I
didn't make it.
Not the first black mayor ofMuncie, but hey, I'm on city
council, you know, or who knows,you know, maybe I'll be the
first black mayor at Richmond.
I don't know, you know.
But but just in in, in realizingyou know what that positivity

(32:31):
does for the soul and for me, Ihad to unlock that part of my
brain.
I had to unlock those memoriesand soak that up and kind of and
close off the negative, uh,memories that tried to flood me
and keep me bound up.
Because that man, man, he spokelife to me a lot of times as
well too.
He used to teach me or he usedto tell me.

(32:52):
He said, man, reach for thestars, he said, because even if
you miss, or excuse me, he saidreach for the moon, I apologize,
reach for the moon, he said,because even if you miss, you'll
still be amongst the stars, youknow.
And then, um and crazy, I heard, I believe I heard Les Brown
say the same thing.
So Les Brown is a motivationalspeaker.

(33:12):
Um, and and, and I believe hesaid the same thing, uh, and I'm
like, well, wait a minute.
My dad said that.
How did he know that?
Where did he get that from?
Like he didn't make that up,you know himself.
Um, you know, he had to hearthat somewhere.
I'll say my dad too.
He used to joke and say hecouldn't read or write.

(33:33):
He said that you know he justyou know he didn't do well in
school, wasn't very smart thisor that the other.
But my dad had a library in ourhouse and so, like that was his
office, we had a den and it hada bookshelf and he had books
those are his books all on theshelf.
And so as I got, I got older,I'm talking to myself dad, wait
a minute, you can't read orwrite.
What are you doing all thesebooks?
You know?

(33:54):
and he would sit and he had adesk and he would open up the
Bible and he would have theBible there and he would read it
from time to time and he wouldhave highlights.
And so I'm thinking like dad,nah, you know, you are more than
what you think, you know, evenfor him.
Maybe he struggled with someself-confidence issues.
You know, have no idea.
But, dad, a person that can'tread or write shouldn't have a
library in their house.

(34:14):
You know, they shouldn't valuebooks, you know.
But he did, and I know for metoo.
He created other opportunitiesfor me.
Where he could.
He would trade haircuts forservices for me.
So I remember he got metutoring from a Ball State
professor.
He met him at the barbershop.
Guy came in for a haircut.
He starts talking to him.
Guys like, yeah, I'm a phd,blah, blah, whatever.
Dad be like, all right, myson's at home.

(34:36):
But you know, uh, man, can you,can you help him out?
Yeah, so dad would trade.
He would give him free haircutsif the guy would come and tutor
me or would show me things likehe, you know, show me how to
use a computer.
You know, back in the daybefore they were really, you
know, really hitting, and thenwe had the tech that we have now
.
So, um, those things I rememberas well too is how he did try.

(34:57):
He did his best to give me whathe could, and he used the tools
at his disposal to try to makea way for me.

Speaker 3 (35:05):
Yeah that's awesome, that's great, great advice that
he did give you and lots oflessons learned for sure.
So you get through high school.
What's next for you?
So?

Speaker 5 (35:15):
high school, come here to Richmond, attend Earlham
College to play football.
At this point in time, footballwas it?
That's all I knew, really,because, again, I didn't lock in
like I should have in school.
I didn't make the worst grades,but I didn't make the best
grades either.
I didn't do as well as I couldhave.
I didn't make the worst grades,but I didn't make the best
grades either.
I didn't do as well as I couldhave.

(35:39):
So again, I'm still in themindset of now I'm 18.
I got to get out of the house.
Man, I cannot stay in thishouse.
I know if I stay in Muncie,even if I go to Ball State, my
dad's going to try to talk meinto staying at home.
He's going to tell me all over,you know you stay here.
Nope, not spend another day inthis house.
Got to go.
So, but at the same time, in mymind too, I thought I want to

(36:01):
get just far enough away that Iknow they're not going to try to
come and see me every day, butjust close enough that if I need
them, I know they'll be there.
And that's where I landed, andthat's exactly what, what
happened for me.
And then even surprise, I meaneven, you know, going to El Paso
, texas.
You know my parents made it,you know, out there, made it to
Houston, actually went to a bowlgame.

(36:22):
So they made it to the HoustonBowl for me, you know as well
too.
So, but came to Earlham, playedfootball, was recruited, had the
opportunity to go to, you know,several different schools, went
to Butler's campus.
I remember that trip andchecked them out.
You know Ball State, you know,was an option, possibly as a
walk-on or something like that.
And so for me I kind of, youknow, thought about it and kind

(36:45):
of weighed my options and itcame down to, you know, ability
to play.
So where can I come in andwhere can I play versus?
Where do I come in and where doI sit, you know, for the next,
you know, one, two years, youknow, and maybe hopefully play
junior, senior year, somethinglike that.

(37:07):
And so Earlham worked out for mesmall campus, you know, small
class size, which would havebeen a lot better If I'd have
went to a big school.
Man, I'd have got lost in thenumbers and who knows if I'd
have finished or not.
But Earlham provided me with alot of skills, a lot of
resources as well too.
I mean, it's the reason why Icame back, really and made
Richmond my home and I'm stillhere today is because a lot of

(37:27):
what I gained from my experiencethere what position were you in
?
Defensive tackle?
So I played defensive line.
I was about to ask it.
Yeah, I go between tackle and uhand and defensive end.
I wasn't quite fast enough tobe on the end so I'd slide down
that.
The coach put me down to tackleoften times and I I did well
there, man, and I'll tell you.
Um, football, and so again, youknow, coming practice, hated

(37:51):
practice again, didn't, didn'tlike going two a days.
Uh, and man, just uh, Iremember too coming coming in.
So football, you guys know youknow you come in earlier than
everybody else.
Uh, you know you got trainingcamp.
You got two a days and all that.
It's, it's hot.
Um, there's no water on the onthe grass dirt field.
It's like you're playing onrocks and the grass cuts like

(38:14):
glass.
And my coach shout out to KevinHanley, who was my position
coach when I played at Earlhamand he's an Earlham alum, but I
think he and the other coachesforgot we didn't have pads on,
so we would do like pass rushdrills and things like that,

(38:35):
with the offensive line with nopads.
And I'm like it's kind of funnytoo, because I'm like man, I
just laugh at myself, I'm allsensitive and like, oh, you know
, no, I don't like that, myjersey, you know, I mean, but
you know, but it's like it'sfootball and the other guys be
like, you know, like nah, manback up, like don't touch me,

(38:58):
give me some space, you know.
But man, it was just, it waswild, but man, I just, I was
around a bunch of good guysthough, good guys from all walks
of life.
I learned something.
You know a little bit fromeverybody.
One of my memories I rememberKyle Strobel punching me in the
stomach during a scrimmage, andhe was a senior, I think, when I

(39:22):
was maybe a freshman, and Iremember I'm going up against
him he's offensive tackle, Ibelieve and I go up against him
and I'm trying to block a pass,and they always tell you you
know, don't jump, don't jump,you just put your hands up.
Well, I see, I see the ball, Isee the quarterback, he's got
the ball in his hands.
I'm like I'm gonna knock thisdown.
So I jump, kyle, man just sticksme a good one man in the

(39:46):
stomach doubles me over, youknow, and it was.
It was moments like that again,just just the hardship.
I didn't understand it, Ididn't understand the benefit of
the struggle, and so so at thetime, I mean I find myself kind
of cowering down and kind of andkind of going inside myself and
and and getting upset, gettingemotional, you know, sometimes

(40:08):
wanting to quit, you know, giveup type of thing.
But but luckily too, my dadnever let me quit anything.
I wrestled one year in middleschool.
It was the worst thing ever.
Wrestling is the worst sport.
No, I'm just kidding, I do notlike it's tough, it is too much
one-on-one.
I mean it's just you and thatother person and I mean, and you

(40:28):
are as close as you ever wantto be with another individual
when you wrestle.
And I just did not enjoy it.
I'm like, at least on the lineI got two or three other people
I can bump into, or maybe athrow you into.
Uh.
But my dad said you're notquitting, you know you're going
to finish out the season, youagreed to do this and so you're
going to go all the way with it.
And so I'm like, all right,cool.

(40:49):
So so I did that, you know.
So I, I, I never, although Istruggled a lot of times
emotionally, mentally, I neverhad that give up, I never had
that quit.
I never had that.
I'm just going to throw in thetowel.
It's like, man, I take a minutekind of go inside myself, have
my little moment and it's likeall right, come back.
Okay, let's try it again.

(41:10):
How do we do this?
Football was tough.
Earlham they've closed up theirprogram since.
We had a lot of losing seasons,unfortunately.
Sophomore year, though, we hada great winning season.
We went six and four I thinkthat was the last winning season
that we had did.

(41:41):
That was?
We stayed at school over thesummer, we stayed together, we
worked out together, um, and wecame in that next year and and
we were the strongest, you know,and the most together that that
we had ever been uh, man, if wecould have, just, you know,
stuck with that and duplicatedthat for the next, you know, two
more years, it would have beenan awesome ride.

Speaker 3 (41:54):
Yeah, I don't think.
I mean I may be a little biased, but I don't think there's any
better sport out there where youcan learn more about sacrifice,
about camaraderie, abouttrusting your teammates.
You know I'm like you.
There's many guys I played withhigh school and college.

(42:16):
You know that I may have I maynot have talked to in 15 or 20
years, but I could go, I canmake a phone call tomorrow and
we'd be, we'd pick up rightwhere we left off.
And it's through that, the blood, sweat and tears.
You know the two days of, uh, Imean I I similar to you as
you're, as you're talking aboutyour experience in college,

(42:36):
especially with me being in thesame position.
So when I was at Dayton, weplayed on the old AstroTurf at
Welcome Stadium.
That was our.
We were on the old AstroTurf,but they had my freshman year.
They just replaced the old turf, which was like matted carpet,
with new AstroTurf, not fieldturf, astroturf and it was like
needles.

Speaker 5 (42:56):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (42:58):
And so you would.
It was so sharp that you wouldtake a knee at the end of
practice and you'd get up andyour knee was bleeding.
That's how sharp it was.
You can imagine what it did toyour skin as you skidded across
it.
So I don't think there's anybetter sport out there.
Tougher wrestling is verydifficult.
I did it one year as well and Iwanted to quit.
My dad would not let me.
Um, it was it was too muchclose quarters with another man

(43:24):
who was trying to choke me outand, uh, get me in positions.
I didn't know I could go in Um,but what?
What an amazing sport.
What amazing life lessons thatI learned.
It sounds like you did too.

Speaker 5 (43:32):
Yeah most definitely, you know, one of the biggest
things for me my senior year atEarlham and it took me a while
to get there, but it was mysenior year.
I might be going into my junior, out of my junior into my
senior, but anyway, it was thisthought.
I just had this revelation oneday and I'm like, what am I here
doing?
Like I've been playing thisgame ever since I've been in

(43:54):
middle school and I've beenplaying for my dad.
I've been hating every minuteof it.
Like what if I go out here andgive it my all?
What if I go out here and just,you know, forget about all the
outside noise and I just do thevery best I can?
What if I just lock in?
And you know what?
What then?

(44:14):
And you know what?
What then?
And a switch, you know, flippedfor me and I had a great season
and what I enjoyed.
I started to enjoy the struggle, I started to enjoy practice.
I started to enjoy getting beatup and jumping back up again
and getting back out there andrealizing that I'm learning
something every time I fail or Imiss a tackle or I get blocked

(44:40):
by the offensive lineman.
Like I'm learning and I'mcalculating.
I'm like, ok, next time I'mcoming back, man, and I'm coming
back harder, and I'm doing itdifferently.
I remember, you know, inthinking like what can I
actually do to be successful?
And one of the things that Isaid is I'm running from
sideline to sideline, I don'tcare what the play is, I'm
running all over this field.

(45:01):
And I thought to myself likewhat's the worst thing that
could happen?
Truly, what's the worst thingthat could happen?
And I'm like, oh my God, Icould die.
And I'm like how cool wouldthat be to die on the football
field.
You know what I'm saying.
Because then then, like, no,there would be no doubt that
this guy gave everything he hadto the sport, he gave everything
he had in this game, and that'show I wanted to feel and that's

(45:23):
what I wanted to do.
And so I went out and did thatand it was such that, um, I
remember my middle linebacker,rodney gunn, best friend, um,
you know to this day, man, wewould.
He would be right behind me,ball would snap, we go in.
Uh, somehow, sometimes I wouldget there first, sometimes he
would get there first.
And it was funny because my dadso it was my dad and my uncle

(45:45):
they would tell this story myuncle was the outside linebacker
, my dad was the middlelinebacker, and my dad would say
my uncle was faster, and so hewould tell my uncle he's hey,
harv, you go get him, you gochase him down, you catch him
but you hold him up for me andmy dad would come clean him up
and they, they, these two guys,they get together.
They love telling that andthat's exactly how I was with

(46:06):
rodney.
I tell rodney, go get him man,hold him up.
I tell everybody, hold him up.
I remember running sometimesand I'd see the pot hold him up,
don't take him down.
I'm coming.
And I'd come and clean it, man,to the point that we get back
to the huddle and rodney wouldlook at me and say, hey, man, if
you hit me in my back one moretime, he'd be like, why, every
time I get up off the pot, whyare you on top of me?
I'm like I have no idea.

(46:27):
I'm coming, like I'm.
I just said I'm not gonna beputting in all this effort
anymore for nothing.
Like I'm gonna put in some work, I'm going to get some stats.
You know, and I'm not.
I didn't even count the stats.
I can't remember scores.
I can't, never.
I don't remember necessarilywins or losses or anything like
that.
I don't remember personal stats, but I do remember when I was
in.
I was in the, I was in the game, I was in the play.

(46:48):
I'm getting in that play.
That's what I wanted and Irealized the benefits of this
and so after I graduate, Icoached for a little bit.
I coached at Earlham.
I coached at UTEP as a graduateassistant and I remember
coaching at Earlham one time Idon't remember the game, don't
remember the coach, but Iremember after a game I'm on the
field and we're shaking handswith the other team and I go

(47:10):
over to shake a coach's hand andthe coach stops me and says man
, reinhardt, and I said yeah,and he said man.
He said he said man.
I remember he said we had toplan our offense around you when
we played you.
When you played, he was like man, you were tough, he's like we
had.
We had to work our offensearound you, the nose tackle.

(47:31):
You know, man.
You know, and in the moment,like thinking back, like I I
don't think I realized thegravity of that moment, like
what that really meant, but Iwas like man, like that's,
that's pretty cool, that'spretty awesome.
You know what I'm sayingunderstanding and learning,

(47:53):
having these moments andlearning from the hard times and
then relishing and taking pridein these moments where you know
somebody acknowledges you andsays, hey, you did good, hey,
you're having an impact out here, yeah, that's what it's all
about.

Speaker 3 (48:10):
Yeah, that's awesome.
Yeah, what a great feeling.
And do you ever regret thatthat switch didn't happen
earlier?
Oh, most definitely Mostdefinitely.

Speaker 5 (48:18):
I look at a lot of things, several things I've done
, whether it be, you know,playing an instrument, whether
it be my studies, whether it befootball.
Yeah, if I would have locked in, if I would have known sooner
and would have locked in sooner,I could have gone so much
further.
Going to UTEP University ofTexas, el Paso, I remember
walking in there as a gradassistant I'm 22, I think, years

(48:41):
old, a year out of college.
So I stayed.
I graduated in 03.
I stayed and coached footballfor that season, that 03, 04
season.
And then the head coach,lawrence Livingston, that we had
at Earlham.
He coached with Mike Price, uh,in previous years, and played
for him, uh, in previous years.

(49:02):
And so when Mike Price got thejob at UTEP, um, lawrence went
and followed him.
He got the call, so he went tobe the assistant head coach uh,
office line, uh, coach.
And then he calls me and says,hey, do you want to coach an
opportunity?
I'm like sure.
And they put me on a plane andfly me out.
And I get there and I rememberwalking around the stadium in
the complex there and some ofthe players, you know, when they

(49:26):
realized that I was a coach, Iwas a graduate assistant.
They was like, oh man, like man, we thought you were a player,
you know, we thought you wascoming for our position or
something.
And I was like, wow, likethat's pretty cool to think,
because I'm looking at theseguys and I'm looking at this
facility and I'm like, oh mygosh, like am I in the pros,
like Division I football,division I sports is nuts, and I
mean.
And you know, it was justamazing to see and these guys

(49:51):
and their stature.
I was just whew, I was like Iwas really taken, taken back by
it.
But you know, to, to, but Ifelt, you know, really respected
.

(50:12):
I thought to again, you know, ifI had put in the effort, if, if
that yeah if that switch hadflipped sooner, you know, yeah,
I could have went a lot fartherwith it.
But God's got a plan, though,you know, and God will work it
out, you know, for our good, youknow.
So, um missed an opportunitythere, but I'm happy.
You know where I am now and I'mloving life and and, uh, uh,
the benefits now is that I'm,I'm, I'm opening up my eyes more
to see, uh, you know, godworking, and that's that's where
I want to be.

Speaker 3 (50:33):
Well, and there's a reason that that switch didn't
get flipped until you're goinginto your senior year.
You know now, you know you'remore mature and you recognize
that everything that you do,whether it's from raising your
family or working or giving backall the things that you're
doing, you know you're going togive it max effort.
You're going to be the best youcan be.
Oh, yeah, definitely.

Speaker 5 (50:50):
And and two.
I think, as you're saying, thatI'm thinking like, yeah, because
I could have.
I could have been moresuccessful then, and then I
would have taken all the creditfor myself, or I would have ran
off and thought, oh, look what Idid, okay, and I would have
been selfish with money or withopportunities or with whatever,
and not have given back.
And so and so much of what I'vedone in my adult life, and what
I am going to continue to do,is about service, is about

(51:12):
serving others and giving youknow to others, and to stay
humble is where I want to be.
And so I know you know that youknow God looked at me, probably
at one point and said man, Ican't bless you with these, with
this money or with this rightnow, because you're not ready,
you're not in the right mindset.
You take this money andsquander it.

(51:33):
You'd run off and you'd forgetall about me.
And I need you to, I need youto lock in, I need you to devote
yourself, you know, to me, andthat's that's where I'm at,
absolutely.

Speaker 3 (51:43):
Yeah, so you're, you're UTEP.
Uh, life's pretty good,enjoying life.

Speaker 5 (51:49):
Yeah, man, utep was hard, Um, and not UTEP itself,
but I just, I was young, I wasimmature, I didn't know what I
was doing, I was a fish out ofwater, I was far from home, had
never been that far, I neverleft home really before ever.
I went to Philadelphia for asemester in college but I went
with two other friends, twoother football players, and so

(52:11):
to be out in El Paso, you know,kind of on my own.
I had my coach, livingston, buthe had a family, his wife and
kids, and I probably could haveleaned into them more and I know
they would have opened up theirdoors to me and would have
brought me in.
But you know, at the same timeI'm like, but I'm grown and I
want to kind of live my own lifeand do my own thing and have
fun and see some things.

(52:32):
And so I, man, got into somethings I shouldn't have gotten
into and created some habits formyself that I shouldn't have
done and ended up leaving aftera season I realized football is
not where I wanted to be.
Division one sports is a lot ofwork, sports in general is a lot
of work, but D1, nuts, I meanjust the work ethic that these

(52:55):
coaches have and the time andthe effort and the energy that
they put in.
And then the uncertainty aswell too.
And what I saw is, you know, ifyour head coach loses a job,
you know potentially the wholecoaching staff, you know, gets
shaken up and may have to go aswell too.
And I'm like I don't like theuncertainty of that and having
to move.
So after a year, after thatfirst season, I left.
But I got to enjoy a bowl game.

(53:17):
I got to meet a lot of greatplayers, several of them who
went on to play in the NFL, andit's kind of cool to be able to
watch Quentin Demps, you know,play for the New England
Patriots and see him on the, andI'm like, wait a minute
watching TV.
I know him like that's Demps,you know, man, that's to have
those moments.
I got a bowl ring.
You, you know, went to theHouston Bowl.

(53:37):
Parents came up and saw thatgame and good memories you know
from that.
But I knew if I didn't get outof El Paso I was going to die.
Just some dumb stuff that I wasdoing, making poor choices,
crossing the border into Mexico,and you know what is not where

(53:58):
I should have been.

Speaker 3 (53:59):
Sure, Sure.
So you're mature enough torecognize all right, I need to
make change in my life.
Oh, definitely so where'd?

Speaker 5 (54:06):
you go, came back, came back to Richmond so I said,
well, you know, again, didn'twant to go home to Muncie just
because I didn't want to go tothe house.
But I thought, you know, sowhere can I go?
I've been raised to you, knowvalue, relationships and people
and connections, and so I wentback where I felt connected.

(54:28):
I went back to where I hadpeople and that was here in
Richmond.
Benita Washington, lacey,longtime employee of Earlham
College mentor, no-transcriptforth, and so you know, did that

(55:09):
, so came back here and ended uplanding a job at the state
hospital actually.
So I started with the summerposition working with youth at
the state hospital doingrecreation.
Patrick Piper another footballcoach, great guy, mentor was
working out there at the timeand he was able to get me on in
a summer position which thenturned into a full-time position

(55:31):
, which then turned into, Ithink I was there for like five
years and left in a supervisoryposition when I left that job.

Speaker 3 (55:39):
So what were you doing specifically at the state
hospital?
Working with youth.

Speaker 5 (55:43):
So state hospital was a residential facility.
It is a residential facility.
At the time they had kids,adolescent males, on their
campus and so I would.
When I was in the rec position.
I would just prepare likerecreational activities for him.
So I take him out you know agroup of them, we go to the
playground, we play kickball,maybe we take him on trips, you

(56:04):
know, out into the community tothe parks or the pool or
something like that, and dodifferent things.
And then it grew into you knowkind of direct care staff.
So hands on, you know caringfor them on-to-day, making sure
they get to school, making surethey get meals, breaking up
fights, you know kind of keepthem in the building, chasing
them down if they run away.
You know those kinds of things.
And then again, like I said,you know landing in a

(56:25):
supervisory position where Ifinished up.
So then at that point I'moverseeing the direct care staff
you know in the operation ofthe unit, so making sure that
you know services are beingoffered, kids are getting what
they need, staff is getting whatthey need and they're
understanding you know theirresponsibilities creating
schedules, programming.
You know writing curriculum,you know all that kind of stuff.

Speaker 3 (56:45):
Okay, so giving back to troubled kids basically.

Speaker 5 (56:48):
Oh yeah, absolutely.
And that was something that wasreal big and early on again
instilled in me and somethingthat I wanted to do.
You know, even as an Earlhamstudent, me and the guys, we
formed a group called Black MenUnited and part of that was to,
you know, break down and thestigma of black men in the
community and so we wanted toshow young black men doing
something positive, and sothings that we would do, you

(57:10):
know we would bring.
We had a field day where webrought kids from, you know,
like Townsend Boys and GirlsClub, you know, like Townsend
Boys and Girls Club, you know,onto Earlham's campus.
We, you know, had a cookout forthem, played football, you know
, ran around that kind of thing,you know, just to they could
see us in a different light andwe show them the campus and, you
know, show them that somebodycares, you know, a little bit.
And so there was always thatelement of you know wanting to

(57:31):
give back.
And when I saw the kids at thestate hospital, it was about,
you know, wanting to, you know,be for them what I didn't have,
you know, coming up, but thenalso wanting to provide them
with what I did have, you know,coming up and that was, you know
, a positive individual, youknow saying, you know uplifting
things.
You know, to me, when I wasyounger and these kids a lot of

(57:55):
them didn't have, and I lookedat them and their situations and
you know they have traumaticbackgrounds.
They dealt with parents thatyou know were addicted to drugs
and they suffered abuse and sosimilar stories maybe not the
same, but some similaritiesthere and I'm looking like I
mean this could have been me.
You know, if the tables wereturned, if things would have
worked out differently, you knowI could have been one of these

(58:16):
kids you know were turned.
If things would have worked outdifferently, you know I could
have been one of these kids, youknow, in these rooms versus.

Speaker 3 (58:19):
You know being where I was.
So that foundation now you'recontinuing to build to help the
community, to help the youth.
What's after State Hospital?

Speaker 5 (58:29):
State Hospital man shoot, where did I go?
Left State Hospital, got intobanking for a little bit, worked
for Chase Bank here in town,did some insurance sales as well
too.
So got to learn that for me itwas about, you know, working
with youth and young people.
I enjoy that, but at the sametime I've got this degree in
business and nonprofitmanagement, so like let's go see

(58:52):
the business side of things andhow that works.
And so the bank opened up thatdoor for me.
So I got to experience that, youknow, and then for me it's been
a it's kind of been thisteeter-totter between the two,
you know, kind of career paths,because I keep getting drawn
back to to youth and workingwith them and giving back and
trying to help raise up the nextgeneration, just because I

(59:15):
understand, you know just howcrucial is.
I mean, these kids are going tobe caring for me, you know when
I'm old and so, hey, I wantthem to be productive, you know,
citizens, and focused andhardworking and driven.
So that way, hey, when I needthe care, you know you're in the
right position.
You know to take care of me,but more so for them, because

(59:36):
they deserve it right, I meanthey deserve that opportunity
and I realized too the power ofopportunities, what
opportunities can do, how it canopen up doors, how it can
change, help change our mindset.
And again I want to be a partof.
You know all of that, you knowfor them.

Speaker 3 (59:51):
Yeah, that's amazing.
So at some point in timethroughout your career you
decide to to give back even moreand start some, some specific
programs, right?
Can you kind of talk about someof those?

Speaker 5 (01:00:03):
Yeah, so start a future achievers, which is a
nonprofit that works with teens,high school students, primarily
in the community.
That was about, well, at thetime I was in and I and I think
that was about 2012, and I wasin a leadership program and
Future Achievers was basicallyour final project.

(01:00:26):
And there were three of usmyself, erica Butler, who is the
wife of my best friend, montonButler, football player.
We were in the program together.
And then Rachel Ulrich, who atthe time, was a high school
student and were in the programtogether, and then Rachel Ulrich
, who at the time, was a highschool student and was in this
program with a bunch of adults,right, and so we formed a group
and we had this idea to create aprogram that's going to teach

(01:00:48):
skills to high school students.
And we thought about, like,what are those skills that were
lacking, that we didn't get whenwe were in high school?
What is the things that we wishwe had known that we didn't?
And you know, financialliteracy and issues with money
was a big one, and so that'swhere we started and we
partnered with TownsendCommunity Center, got a grant

(01:01:09):
from the Stam Coachline FamilyFoundation to be able to offer
this program to youth, and thatwas the start, the launch we
probably had at you know,upwards of 10 students
participate in that program.
It went really well.
And then it was, you know, forme it was like okay, man, I got
a taste of this.
I really like this.
I think we can do more.
You know, what else can we do?

(01:01:31):
How, how?
How can we formalize things andcreate our own organization to
where we can have more controlof what we're doing and really
grow this?
And so that was that's the pathI took, and grow to where we
are now.
Yeah, so where are you now?
So now we are actually rightnow.

(01:01:53):
So we're doing some, some, somerebuilding, kind of coming back
.
We've had a couple ofresurgence Twenty, nineteen was
one of those and now in a phasewhere I feel like I've, for you
know, way beyond, way beyond myyears and so with me to kind of

(01:02:29):
getting into different areas andI'm teaching now full time, and
so it's it's kind ofchallenging to do the work full
time, and so it's it's kind ofchallenging to do the work full
time.
It's it's been me, you know,for a lot of it, you know, as
I've developed programs and thena part of developing the
program was me actually runningthe program and trying it out
and then tweaking it.
You know, as I'm learning andso now I feel like we we have

(01:02:50):
some good things together thatit's time to to scale this, you
know, get some other folksinvolved, put these programs out
there and let this grow andflourish, and to really get out
and help these kids.

Speaker 3 (01:03:02):
Yeah, that's awesome.
So you mentioned briefly thereyou're teaching now.
So you're teaching at RichmondHigh School, yes, so talk about
that a little bit, becausethat's kind of interesting.

Speaker 5 (01:03:12):
Yeah, man, teaching at Richmond High School.
This is my first year as ateacher, so looking forward to
the summer and then getting backand getting back into the
classroom and working with theseteens again.
But in this was, you know, along time, you know, coming and
I feel like for me to make Ijust been showing me so much

(01:03:32):
like just about paying dues, onething I didn't want to do right
, coming up as being a youngster, you got to pay your dues.
You got to start at the bottomand you got to work your way up.
You got to prove yourself and Ididn't.
I didn't want to do that, youknow, early on.
But the high school I feel likeI've worked with several of
these folks, several of theadministrators at the high
school and teachers, over theover a number of years, and

(01:03:53):
they've seen the work that I'vedone.
And Future Achievers was inRichmond, richmond High School
as well too, and so we wereproviding mentoring services to
the high school students there,and so it was really as far as
getting in it was.
It was really a seamlesstransition.
Almost it's like it was.
You know, hey, we've seen your,your work ethic, we've seen
your care for, for, for, foryouth and and what you're

(01:04:16):
capable of doing, relationshipbuilding, we, we want you, you
know, in the classroom, um, andso that was that was great.
Um, you know, a great feelinguh, to to be able to, to do that
, um, being with these teens, um, all day, uh, for seven, six
periods.
Man, different.

(01:04:38):
I at first I'm in my firstweekend there and I thought to
myself, oh shoot, like, what didI get myself into?
Like I was already in theschool and mentoring students,
right, but I'd pull them out ofclass.
I'd keep them for 30 minutestops and then go put them back,
like we'd have a strong 30minute conversation.
I'd send them back, like thatwas cake.
Then I looked around the roomand I almost thought, like I was

(01:04:59):
locked up or something.
I'm like I can't get out ofthis place.
I can't leave the building if Iwant.
I got another period.
I can't just walk out and justgo get something to eat or go
whatever.
You know that I was used todoing, and so that was that was
that was a shock, you know, forme.
But the students are great, thestudents are great and they've

(01:05:20):
taught me a lot and I'm gratefulthat, that I've been open, I
believe, to their educating me,you know, letting me know where
I'm making mistakes and what Ican do better, and that's fuel
for me just to come back andknock it out of the park.
Because, again, you know, tohave that impact is what I want.

(01:05:41):
And so I was blessed to have acouple students you know didn't
have to, they wrote me notes orwould send me an email.
Hey, mr Reinhart, you know Ireally appreciate, you know,
what you've done for me, orappreciate, you know what you
did you're a great teacher.
You know kind of thing reallymade me feel good.
You know what you did, you're agreat teacher.
You know kind of thing reallymade me feel good.
One moment that I had was one ofthe things that God gave me was

(01:06:01):
to celebrate birthdays in class, and so I'm not typically high
energy, fun type of person.
When I worked in behavioralhealth, I would tell the kids
that I worked with like I'm notthe fun counselor, I'm not the
fun staff member, like that'snot why they put you with me.
All right, I'm here to get workdone, we're going to get the
job done and let's move on.

(01:06:21):
But now I'm realizing, in orderto educate, in order to, to to
really shape you know, helpshape these kids.
You gotta be a little morelively, you gotta be a little
more fun and easy going, and soone of the things that we did
was we celebrated birthdays.
And so it's cool because whenwe do attendance, when it comes
up on the computer it shows likea little birthday cake.
So you know, you click on it,you see when their birthday is,

(01:06:42):
and so, as I'm going through, Iclick on a cake and I'm like, oh
shoot, wait a minute, this bigto do about it the whole class.
I'd ask them to sing.
I would sing happy birthday tothe student, and then I had some
snacks that I would store upand I would let them pick a
snack that would be theirbirthday present.

(01:07:03):
Right, not all the kids likedit.
Some kids really hated it andtried to hide underneath the
table, but I had a student, youknow, who told me that they
really appreciated that and whatthat meant for them to be
recognized like, even thoughthat they were shy and it looked
like they didn't enjoy it.
Like, deep down, they did.
You know, and it really makesyou wonder, like you don't know

(01:07:24):
who gets, you know, a birthdaycelebrated around here and who
doesn't, you know?
And that's one of the thingsthat I learned about these kids
too, like I've got a new respectand appreciation for them
because some of their backgroundwhere they're coming from, a
new respect and appreciation forthem because some of their
backgrounds where they're comingfrom.
I mean, I had to learn over theyears working with students
like man.
We got to calm down a littlebit, you know.
We, you know, just be happy.

(01:07:44):
That kid came to school.
All right, if you would haveknown, if you knew what this
child had to go through to evenwalk through the door today, you
know you would cut them alittle bit of slack, you would
give them a little bit of grace.
And so you know, I'm reminded,you know of that.
And so to be able to do thatfor that student and again for
it to impact them in a positiveway, that's what it's all about.

Speaker 3 (01:08:06):
Yeah, and that's pretty awesome.
I mean, a lot of times it'sjust those little things right.
And it can be a recognition ofa birthday that they may not
have been recognized for theirbirthday for years, even from
their family.
I mean, you just don't know,right, you don't know those
stories, you don't know whatthose kids are going through.
So there's no doubt I'm sureyou're having a major impact on
that school and, uh, that'spretty awesome.

Speaker 5 (01:08:28):
By the grace of God, I'm trying.
That that's it.
I'm just trying to be obedientand and uh and go where go,
obedient, and and uh and gowhere, go where he leads me.

Speaker 3 (01:08:35):
So you're doing good.
All right, we're going tofinish this with two questions.
If you could sit on a parkbench and have a conversation
with someone living or deceased.
Who would it be, and why?

Speaker 5 (01:08:51):
Man, I wasn't ready for that one, and I've seen that
in the other episodes.
You know, first thought thatcomes to my mind, man, and it
was First thought.

(01:09:23):
First first thing that came tomind was my dad.
He passed away in 2019 in ahouse fire, actually the house I
grew up in and I've talkedabout and a house fire, actually

(01:09:43):
the house I grew up in, andI've talked about grace.
I've mentioned that a few timesand that's so important to me
and, again, that's the takeaway.
If there's one that would be,it is grace and I believe my dad
taught me that.
Uh, through through his passing, um, I struggled at first, you

(01:10:07):
know, with it early on again,you know, I I told you some of
the bad side, you know some ofthe good side, and then when he
died, you know, I reflected alot on the bad stuff and and and
was trying to hold himaccountable or judge him.

(01:10:28):
You know, for that, and Ireally believe that, you know,
god told me in that moment againlike, hey, you're not perfect
either.
You know.
Hey, wait a minute.
Yeah, you've made the samemistakes that he has made.
You know, it was also in thatmoment.

(01:10:48):
So, 2019, here I am, you know,in Richmond.
Uh, been working, futureachievers, done all these things
.
People know me in the community.
People are speaking highly ofme and I believe God said to me
as well too like man, how dareyou make this mistakes that you
have made?
And people still think highlyof you.

(01:11:10):
People still regard you, youknow, with respect and speak to
you kindly and offer positionsto you and offer you to sit at
tables and want to hear from you.
They feel like you havesomething to say.
How dare you take all of thatright but then not extend that
same grace over to somebody else?

(01:11:32):
You think those people don'tknow who you are or what you did
?
And if they don't, it's onlybecause of God's grace that that
that that didn't come up andbecome an issue and that God was
allowed, able to allow me toflourish and to thrive and to
move forward.
And so it was.
You got to extend that samegrace to your father as well, to

(01:11:53):
again understanding that, hey,maybe he didn't grow up with
some of these things.
You know that, that he lackedto pass on and to share.
Maybe he didn't, you know ofthese things.
You know that he lacked to passon and to share.
Maybe he didn't, you know,recover from some of the trauma
that he experienced, you knowthroughout childhood, but then

(01:12:15):
on later you know into life.
You know as well too.
And how it happened, too, for mewas it was looking at how he
died.
Right, it was what started tounpack it for me.
So he died in a house fire.
He was a smoker, like lifelongsmoker, and we think we start it
started from a cigarette thathe had dropped, you know, on the
carpet and um, but you knowlittle things hearing from the
investigator and seeing thingslike man, it just God's hand at

(01:12:40):
work.
I just kept seeing it over andover, like like that's God, who,
who kept him, who, even indeath, who protected him and was
there with him.
You know in that moment, andthat's the thing, and it's like
God, you were with him and Ithought he was so bad.
It's like, yeah, I was with himand I'm with you.
You know as well too, and soyou know if I can love him, you

(01:13:05):
can too.
If I can forgive him, you cantoo.
And I would say too, forgivenessand grace is so important,
because this is something that Ithink hurts a lot of
relationships and hurts a lot offamilies.
We talk a lot about kids heretoday, and and we can talk about
adults, adults are.
A lot of these adults out herewalking around are are little

(01:13:29):
kids at heart, right, they,they've never grown up.
They're they're, they're eight,and nine and 12.
And they're still stuck in that, in that, in that space,
because they've never healedfrom that.
And what we do, unfortunately,is we start to point the finger

(01:13:54):
and we judge and we blame and weaccuse, and then we destroy
relationships by that.
And then, once we destroyrelationships, well then now we
don't have anybody to turn to,we don't have a support, we
don't have people in our cornerwho although, yes, they made
mistakes, but they were mybiggest cheerleader as well too.
My dad was my biggestcheerleader.
I mean, my dad went to everyhome football game.
You know how many kids can saythat, that their dad went to

(01:14:17):
every football game, every homefootball game.
My dad went to every homecollege football game.
I mean he came to Richmondevery Saturday.
My dad was a barber.
His money making day wasSaturday, and he would tell the
guys at work.
He would say, hey, comeSaturday.
Hey, ryan, my son's playing.
I got it.
I'm working half a day.
I got to get to this game.
You know what I'm saying so,even in, in, in, in, in the

(01:14:40):
midst of making mistakes, he wasdoing the right thing and he,
he had man, he had me in my bestinterest, you know, on his mind
as well too.
And if we're not careful, wecan get so jaded by the mistakes
that people have made that wetotally dismiss them, we totally

(01:15:02):
write them off, and there's somuch that we can learn from them
, there's so much we can gainfrom that relationship.

Speaker 3 (01:15:05):
There's so much that I learned, you know, from my dad
, you know, and so so for me,yeah, I think it would be just
to sit and talk with him and totell him how much I've learned,
and to have conversations aboutyou know how, how we've grown,
and yeah, you know you startedoff the podcast kind of talking

(01:15:26):
about how difficult it wasgrowing up and some of the
struggles you know, theaddictions and domestic violence
and things that that you saw asa kid and I didn't know where
you were going to go with that,with your dad.
But and I don't know that youeven meant this, but I, I, I
think what's came out fromhearing your story is is this is

(01:15:50):
a testament to your dad.
I think what you, what youmaybe you did it knowingly,
maybe you didn't, but you knowyou went from where I.
I didn't know where your storywas going to go, but I knew
where I thought it was going andit went the complete opposite
way.
That's pretty awesome, man.
It's pretty it's pretty awesome.

(01:16:11):
It's a testament to you, atestament to your dad, uh, even
through all his struggles and Ihope somebody out there hears
that, because you know when,when you hold grudges, when you
hold ill will towards peoplebecause of something they did to
you or to someone you know, theonly person that's hurting is
you and you're the one thatholds that resentment Right.

(01:16:34):
So, to to let that go and tosee the emotion on your face, um
, and to see the emotion on yourface, it's amazing, it's pretty
awesome, pretty powerful.
Last question Is there a quote,bible verse, something out
there, when you're in a darkspot or when things are tough,
that you lean on and you say,hey, this is what gets me

(01:16:55):
through?

Speaker 5 (01:16:56):
Oh, man, got a whole sheet of them.
Got a whole sheet of them.
Got a whole sheet of them, man.
I'll tell you y'all try to runthrough Psalms 91.
And it's a good deal ofinformation.
But Psalms 91 is our familypsalm, my grandmother, that was
her scripture and just how Ibelieve, as I was kind of

(01:17:18):
thinking through, coming in andkind of looking back over my
life, how Psalm 91 and herprayers carried me, you know, as
a youngster, and coming up andprotected us even through the
hard stuff.
Right, and God never promisedus an easy life, the opposite.

(01:17:39):
You know, man's days are goingto be short and full of trouble,
so we're going to have issues,but we're going to come out.
You know, on the other side,we're going to come out all
right, it's going to work out,you know, for our good.
But as an adult Proverbs 3, 5,and 6, and trust in the Lord
with all thine heart and leannot unto not own understanding.
In all that ways, acknowledgehim and he will direct your path
.

(01:18:00):
There was a time for me in mylife where I looked back and I
thought, man, I'm not going theright way.
You know, I've got to changethis up, I've got to do better.
I know there's more out herefor me.
I'm destined for greatness, andthat's what I want.
I want everything God has forme, and Proverbs 3, 5 came to me
, and so that was the turningpoint, and so that's why I fall

(01:18:21):
back to is trusting in God withall my heart and not leaning
into my own understanding andrealizing God, I messed this all
up.
I have no idea what I'm doing,and so I'm giving it all to you.
I got to acknowledge you, and Iappreciate this opportunity to
be here with you all today to dojust that, and I pray that I
did that, um, to speak the nameof Jesus, uh, on this podcast

(01:18:44):
and let people know, uh, whatthis is all about and where this
really comes from, um, so thathe will continue to direct my
path, so that I can serve him.

Speaker 3 (01:18:53):
So it's awesome, man.
How can people connect with youat social media?
Um, if somebody to reach outand say thank you, how can they
connect with you?

Speaker 5 (01:19:03):
Oh man, yeah, Everywhere I'm social media, my
phone number is out there, butI'll throw it out 765-313-9670.
I did that one time.
Somebody's like you really wantto give out your phone number.
That's what I was just thinking.
Yeah.
Nah, it's all good, hit me up,shoot me a text message, but
yeah, I'm on social media.
Just Carl Reinhart, my face isout there, instagram everywhere,
future Achievers is out thereas well, too, and so if anybody

(01:19:27):
wants to collaborate, you know,got any ideas on how we can
better help these teens out here.
Parents, if they want to get,you know, kiddos involved need a
mentor.
One of the big things, too, isI'm always on the hunt for
entrepreneurs and businessleaders and professionals,
because I think it's importantand I've told this to my high
school students this year it'simportant for them to get out

(01:19:47):
and have conversations.
Again, I know the power ofopportunities and I came up.
I don't know what, I don't knowRight, but how we can change
things, and how I can changethings is if I can create an
opportunity for a young personto be able to sit down with
somebody that is in the positionthat they're interested in and
they can have a conversation,just simply hey, what time do

(01:20:11):
you have to wake up to get towork?
Do you like your job?
You know, tell me about thebest day and the worst day, you
know, kind of thing.
How much money do you make?
That information will helpthese young people so much you
know start to believe inthemselves and to believe in the
opportunities in the future andstart to chart their path with

(01:20:31):
more knowledge and understanding, especially more than what I
had.
You know going into it, and soyou got a lot that are afraid of
college debt and things likethat and making the wrong
decision.
Well, the only way that youmitigate that is with knowledge,
and so, although I want toenjoy summer and hopes it stays

(01:21:03):
around for about 12 months, it'snot going to, so winter's
coming back.
So if anybody wants tovolunteer and get involved there
, hit me up.
We'll plug you in.

Speaker 3 (01:21:11):
But yeah, it's awesome man, great story, very
powerful.
I thank you again for coming in.

Speaker 5 (01:21:19):
I appreciate you, man , I appreciate the work you guys
are doing.
Again, this is awesome.
This is awesome, and I tell youjust to be surrounded by people
of such great faith I mean andas a man, you know, we don't get
this oftentimes to be able tosit with other men, and if folks
I would encourage people get onhere, watch the podcast and
you're going to see guys breakdown to talking to Brian about,

(01:21:41):
is it Sean?

Speaker 3 (01:21:42):
Yeah.

Speaker 5 (01:21:43):
Oh man, Sean, Sean, that guy's awesome.
That guy's awesome and he isand you can see God's hand on
him and how God is shaping himand changing and molding him and
it's just amazing and inspiringto watch.
And so, uh, please, yeah, checkout the be temper podcast, this
podcast.
This is amazing work you guysare doing, thank you.

Speaker 3 (01:22:01):
Thank you, we appreciate it for sure.
All right, everybody share.
Like do all those thingsbecause somebody out there needs
to hear this story.
Absolutely Go out and betempered.

Speaker 1 (01:22:10):
Hi, my name is Allie Schmidt.
This is my dad, Dan.
He owns Catering's Glass.

Speaker 2 (01:22:15):
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BeTempered Episode 57 – From the Sidelines to the Frontlines of Education with Carl Rhinehart lll

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.css-14f5ked{margin:0;word-break:break-word;display:-webkit-box;-webkit-box-orient:vertical;box-orient:vertical;-webkit-line-clamp:2;overflow:hidden;}BeTempered Episode 57 – From the Sidelines to the Frontlines of Education with Carl Rhinehart lll