October 28, 2025 • 39 mins
Welcome back to Shadow Chat Sessions, the show that digs into the bizarre, the unbelievable, and the downright stupid hiding in the shadows of the internet and history books alike.
This episode brings an all-you-can-eat buffet of chaos, starting with the story that had the zoo world buzzing — “Man Bitten by Panda at Zoo, Bites Panda Back in Rare Case of Mutual Munchies.” From there, we dive headfirst into one of rock’s strangest rumors in “Paul Is Dead”, crawl through the Paris Catacombs’ rumored portal to hell, and scroll into stupidity with The Selfie Burglar – Ashley Keast, Dennis Hawkins the “Bank Robber Barbie,” and Shop with a Cop… and a Crook.
Then it’s on to the Dog-Headed Humanoids of Pennsylvania, a historical WTF double feature with The Kentucky Meat Shower (1876) and The Boston Molasses Flood (1919), and finally the tales that keep internet legends alive — Gef the Talking Mongoose and The Watcher of Westfield, New Jersey.
Each segment mixes sarcasm, skepticism, and a healthy dose of “what the hell did I just hear?” energy — proving once again that stupidity, strangeness, and the supernatural are alive and well in small towns and big cities alike.
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🕵️ Support the show – Become part of the Dark Dialogue Collective or grab exclusive content on [Patreon] or [Ko-fi].
📜 Keep the Dialogue Alive – Follow us on social media @DarkDialoguePod for updates, episode drops, and weird headlines that didn’t make the cut.
📬 Send us your weird story – Email your favorite bizarre headlines or hometown hauntings to info@darkdialogue.com for a chance to be featured.
🕯️ Dark Dialogue Enterprises, LLC – Because truth is stranger when you talk about it in the dark.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
John (00:11):
Okay, and welcome to another episode of Dark Dialogue Shadow Chat Sessions.
I am your host, John,
Angela (00:20):
honor, and laughing.
Angela, I was sitting over here all tense.
I was like, you gotta do something funny.
Gonna do it.
John (00:27):
So this is the, obviously the.
Show where we talk about strange shit.
Dumb, dumb shit, weird shit.
All the shits.
And we just kinda let our hair downif we have hair, for those of us
that don't, we let our goatees downand just kinda have fun with it all
and not worry about a whole lot.
So Angela, how's it going tonight?
Angela (00:47):
It's going well.
It's going well.
How are you?
John (00:49):
I'm great.
Yeah, I'm really good.
Absolutely.
No complaints on my side.
So we ready?
We haven't done one ofthese for a while, so.
Yeah.
Are you ready to jump into this?
I
Angela (01:00):
am, absolutely.
A hundred percent.
John (01:02):
Okay, perfect.
Well, as always, in case you forgot,
Angela (01:06):
I'm loving the cheesy DJ work,
John (01:07):
we start with the strange headline segment.
Angela (01:19):
Bring it on.
John (01:20):
Strange headline is Man bitten by Panda at Zoo Bites Panda back.
In rare case of mutual munchies,
Angela (01:29):
it's only fair.
John (01:31):
So in one of the strangest zoo incidents on record, a man in China
was bitten by a panda during a closeencounter and bit the panda back.
This rare case of a mutualmunchies left everyone confused
and the internet howling.
According to reports, the incidenthappened at the Beijing Zoo, the
(01:54):
man, a tourist allegedly climbedinto the pan, the panda enclosure
to play with the animal, the panda.
A male named Gogo, understandablyreacted by biting his visitor on the leg.
In panic or a strange flex, the man bitthe panda back on the arm later, telling
(02:16):
police that he didn't want to lose zoostaff quickly separated them, and both
survived though the man was hospitalizedand the panda was probably just annoyed.
This wasn't even Gogo'sfirst bite in the incident.
The Panda had previously bittentwo other trespassers in separate
(02:37):
events, cementing his reputation asthe Mike Tyson of the Bamboo eaters.
My take, this guy climbed intoa pandas house, got chopped
and said, I'm gonna chomp back.
That's not courage.
That's chaotic.
Natural energy.
Pandas.
Eat bamboo, bro, not tourists.
(03:00):
And if the pandas sues,I hope to hell he wins.
So should biting back be consideredself-defense or just a stupid escalation?
Angela (03:12):
Stupid escalation.
He climbed in and dude was defending.
It was Castle Doctrine.
John (03:17):
It was absolutely Castle Doctrine.
And let me just go on record.
If you climb into an enclosure ata zoo, you deserve to be bitty.
Yes, a hundred percent
Angela (03:31):
falling in is different.
Climbing in bad,
John (03:33):
totally bad.
And by the way, thatwas an actual picture.
That's Gogo the panda and this nutbar that freaking climbed in there.
So
Angela (03:42):
think the Panda should have been the guy named Google.
John (03:46):
Yeah, you might, you might be onto something there actually.
So why do people think that Pandas arejust cuddly, black and white Labradors?
Angela (03:57):
I mean, they don't look cuddly.
John (04:00):
They're not cuddly,
Angela (04:02):
but they look, it looks so you see,
John (04:05):
I guess so.
But these are the sameidiots that try to, I'm not
Angela (04:08):
climbing in
John (04:08):
pet, the Buffalo and Yellowstone Park, so
Angela (04:12):
they don't look as cuddly as a fan of them,
John (04:16):
maybe.
I don't know.
So what's the wildest animal that youdare to bite back if it bit you first?
I have bit dogs back.
I definitely have, yes.
Okay.
(04:36):
Alright, so you're readyfor the conspiracy corner?
Yes.
Okay, so
Paul is dead.
Angela (04:49):
Did you hear, sorry, I'm gonna interrupt.
Why are people saying Ohio doesn't exist?
John (04:54):
I have no idea.
Angela (04:55):
Okay.
Anyway, go ahead.
John (04:57):
So one of the one of rock's most enduring conspiracy theories
claims that Paul McCartney died in1966 and was replaced by a double.
Fans believed that the Beatlesleft cryptic clues in their songs.
And Alba Art sparking decades ofspeculation, the Paul is Dead Theory
(05:17):
exploded in 1969 when a Detroit DJaired a rumor that McCartney had been
killed in a car crash and replacedwith a lookalike named William Camp.
William Campbell.
Listeners began combingBeatles albums for evidence.
They pointed to the Abbey Roadcover where Paul walks barefoot
(05:38):
out of the step with the otherBeatle out of step with the other.
Beatles interpreted as afuneral procession and.
To the back cover of Sergeant Pepper,where Paul faces away from the camera
lyrics like the walrus was Paul andbackward masked messages were said to be
(06:00):
confessions despite endless debunking.
And Paul himself joking about it saying.
I'm alive and well.
The theory persists mutating intonew forms on Reddit and YouTube.
Some believe the Rick,the lookalikes real name.
Some insist his voice changed and othersclaim that he dropped hints in interviews.
(06:23):
My take, this is the OG CelebrityClone Conspiracy before Avril Levine,
Britney Spears and TikTok Body Doubles.
It's basically 1960s Reddit.
A bunch of people readingtoo much into album art.
Instead of working if Paulwas replaced, his double wrote
some of the best music ever.
(06:45):
So honestly, I'm fine with it.
Angela (06:47):
Exactly.
Who cares?
John (06:50):
So if your favorite celebrity died and was replaced, would you
want to know or just enjoy the music?
Angela (06:56):
Just enjoy the music.
John (06:58):
Yeah, just wanna know.
I mean, it would be so freakingdifficult to replace a musician,
like, no, like that, you know, I mean.
You know, every guitarist, everybassist, every drummer has a very
unique style that people, if they'refamous, try to mimic and try to mimic.
(07:22):
But if I hear JamesHetfield playing guitar.
I know it's James Feld, right?
Like there is no doubt Tonyomi, same freaking thing.
I mean, I could go on and on andyeah, you can learn to play their
music and you can learn to imitateit really well, but it's different.
Angela (07:40):
There's,
John (07:40):
it's different.
I mean,
Angela (07:43):
yeah.
Even if you play
John (07:45):
it like quote unquote, flawlessly.
Yeah.
You can tell the difference.
I don't care.
And maybe it's just a, as a guitarist,you can, you can hear it, but there's
no possible way that you couldpull some shit like that off I, no.
Possible way.
Right.
And vocalists are exactly the same way.
Maybe the one exception is theFilipino kid that took over as
(08:08):
lead singer of journey 'cause Wow.
Oh, that's freaking impressive.
Angela (08:17):
But you still can tell is not.
John (08:19):
Absolutely a hundred percent.
Yeah.
So why do so many conspiracytheories hinge on hidden clues in
album covers and shit like that?
Angela (08:31):
Because everybody likes to be Sherlock Holmes.
Everybody likes to be theone that broke the case.
John (08:38):
And you know what's funny about this whole thing is it
persisted, but alvamar disappeared.
And that's a real tragedy, right?
A real freaking tragedy.
Because I can remember as a kid just goingover the freaking album, Martin, and a lot
of the times they would hide shit in albumart and you would like look through them
Angela (08:59):
not, but
John (08:59):
no, just like hidden little things, you know?
Angela (09:02):
Yeah.
Yeah.
John (09:03):
And then you would get, a lot of the times the album
would have the lyrics in it.
And this was before the internet, soyou can actually figure out what they
were saying, that it's dirty deedsdone dirt cheap and not dirty deeds.
Dunder cheese, like a friendof mine thought it was So
Angela (09:19):
there's not a bathroom on the right.
Yeah.
John (09:21):
Yes.
So should replacement Paul havestarted a sideand called Foe Beetles.
Angela (09:27):
Yes,
John (09:28):
I agree.
Angela (09:30):
Damnit, why are we leaving money on the table?
John (09:33):
You know what, the funniest thing about this is, if the Beatles
were gonna replace somebody,wouldn't it have been linen?
I'm just, I'm just saying it would've,that one would've been logical, right?
But no, they pick a guy that didn'tdie and say he did die, instead of
just saying, yeah, I don't know.
(09:54):
Yeah.
Okay.
You ready for the Reddit Rabbit Hole
Angela (09:57):
afternoon there?
John (10:02):
Paris Catacombs portal.
Oh, the Reddit user.
A Reddit user claims to be on a missionto seal a mysterious portal in the Paris
Catacombs warning of interdimensionalcreatures poised to escape their obsessive
posts blend, urgent calls to action with asurreal narrative of underground warfare.
(10:26):
The saga began on.
Our urban ex exploration where usersshared grainy photos of a sealed off
chamber deep in the Paris catacombs.
They claimed that they had discoveredactive, an active portal emitting low
frequency sounds and strange air currents.
(10:46):
Soon the post moved to our conspiracy andour high strangeness with increasingly
frantic updates about quote creaturespushing at the wall and quote, ritual
seals weakening other redditors.
Alternated between mocking theop, encouraging the delusion,
(11:08):
and begging for live streams.
Some users tried to fact check thecoordinates, but the catacombs are
so sprawling and so dangerous thatverifying anything was nearly impossible.
The thread has become a rabbit,rabbit hole, Reddit rabbit hole of
maps, alleged signals and theoriesabout secret French government
(11:31):
task forces monitoring the portal.
My take, this is peak.
Reddit.
Someone finds a hole, declares it tobe a portal to hell, and suddenly we're
in season three of stranger things.
The only monsters in the catacombsare mold and unpaid tour guides.
But sure, keep sealingyour imaginary gate hero.
Angela (11:54):
It's the upside down.
John (11:56):
It's the upside down.
I mean, as if the catacombs inParis were not creepy enough.
Exactly.
Being lined with humanskulls and shit like that.
Really?
That's, yeah.
That's creepy enough.
Angela (12:07):
That is creepy enough.
And some people may hate me, butthat's the only reason I go to Paris.
John (12:13):
Yeah, me too.
Honestly, I don't have alot of love for France.
I gotta tell you.
Angela (12:18):
They're for the culture and the other things that
everybody goes Paris for as.
Maybe the key chain bridge, but that's it.
John (12:29):
The whaty what?
Angela (12:30):
Just like isn't there a lock pit bridge in there?
Or is that not?
Am I in the wrong?
John (12:35):
Uh oh, maybe.
I think I know what you're talking about.
Yeah, just go to Loveland.
They have a big heart.
You can do the samething on it's way closer.
You don't have to go to France, get a
Angela (12:45):
passport or fly.
John (12:48):
So would you rather explore the Paris catacombs or the back rooms?
Angela (12:54):
The categories.
John (12:55):
Me too.
A hundred percent.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah, it is kind of on my bucket list.
I really want to see it.
I, I absolutely love history and to behonest, there's a lot of freaking cool
castles and shit like that in France.
It's a very, very, very old countrywith, you know, a lot of history there.
So if it wasn't filled with Frenchpeople, sorry, no offense, but.
(13:19):
If it wasn't filled with French people,it would be a lot more inviting to me.
So it's kinda like vertical limit.
Have you seen the movie Vertical Limit?
Angela (13:27):
Oh, might I get in trouble again?
John (13:29):
Yeah, you should get in trouble 'cause it's a damn good movie.
But anyway, the dude in there says,talking about this woman and he says
she's French Canadian some days.
She's Canadian.
She's quite pleasant today.
She's obviously French.
Angela (13:44):
Hello dog.
John (13:47):
So why do portal stories always involve underground spaces?
Bates basements, tunnels, catacombs.
Angela (13:57):
Fair?
John (13:58):
Yeah.
See
Angela (13:59):
I do not,
John (14:02):
the one that doesn't is the Stanley Hotel.
Oh, true.
They could potentiallybe onto something there.
I don't know, but
Angela (14:08):
Well, they think the cosmos are portals and those aren't.
John (14:12):
What's that?
I don't even know what that is.
Angela (14:14):
Have you never been to the cosmos in something Dakota?
John (14:18):
Maybe like
Angela (14:19):
water up.
John (14:20):
Oh, that weird ass place.
Yeah, I think I was when I was a kid,but I, I know what you're talking about.
Yeah.
So what's the best way to tell ifyou're mysterious hole is actually a
supernatural threat or just bad plumbing?
Angela (14:35):
Paul, over
John (14:37):
I, I would say so.
Yeah.
Okay.
Are we ready for our dip shit's?
Diaries
dip shit.
Diaries dip shit.
Diary number one, the selfie burglar.
(14:59):
Ashley Keats.
Rotherham England Burg Burglar.
Ashley Keast couldn't resisttaking a selfie inside the
very house that he was robbing.
Unfortunately, the photo automaticallysent itself to the victim's work
colleagues outing him instantly.
(15:20):
So Keast broke into a home in 2014and stole jewelry, electronics, and a
luxury Rolex Wash Watch worth 4,000.
The funny little lha thing, whatthe hell do they use in England now?
Pound.
Are they back to pounds?
I don't know.
Back to pounds in Sterling.
'cause they were Euros, but they left.
(15:41):
I don't, so I didn't know if they wentback to like the pound, the British
pound, or if it was something else.
Angela (15:46):
The only thing I've heard recently, somebody tell us.
John (15:48):
So 4,000
Angela (15:49):
and tell
John (15:50):
us 4,000 British pounds we'll say.
So while rummaging, he popped astolen sim card into his own phone
and took a triumphant selfie.
The photo didn't just stay on his phone.
It sent itself through WhatsApp,landing right in the inboxes
of the victim's coworkers.
They contacted the police whoarrested Keast at his home.
(16:13):
Shortly afterward, officers foundthe Rolex hidden behind a radiator
along with other stolen goods.
He pled guilty and was sentenced totwo years and eight months in prison.
The judge might as well havecharged him with criminal idiocy.
I idiocy in the first degree.
My take.
(16:34):
You know that you're bad at crimewhen your victim's coworkers
see your selfie before your own,before you're even done burglary.
Imagine explaining that in prison.
Yeah.
I got busted by WhatsApp, markZuckerberg basically snitched me out.
Angela (16:53):
Damn it, mark.
And they'll never lookbehind the radiator.
John (16:56):
Never.
So should phones come with a warning labelthat says may ruin your burglary career?
Angela (17:03):
Yes.
John (17:05):
I mean, I don't, uh, there's, there's no words.
Is the real crime here arroganceor just bad dad Data plans.
Angela (17:17):
Hmm.
Oh,
John (17:21):
I think it's just being an idiot.
No,
Angela (17:23):
actually, yeah, being an idiot.
But a bad data play, that's notthe crime, that's the punishment.
John (17:30):
You might be onto something.
So would you rather be caught onCCTV or by your own selfie, CCTV
100% without a freaking doubt.
Okay, next up we have DennisHawkins Bank, robber Barbie.
Angela (17:47):
Oh, I didn't have that one
John (17:49):
in Ohio.
Dennis Hawkins robbed a bank whiledressed as a woman complete with wig,
fake breasts and bright pink nail polish.
Yes, his disguised didn't last long.
Once police found his ownID in the getaway car.
Oh man.
Hawkins entered the bank in 2010,dressed in drag and wielding a toy gun.
(18:10):
He got away with some money,but in his stolen vehicle, he
left behind his driver's licenseand other personal belongings.
Police tracked him down at a nearby fastfood restaurant where he was still wearing
the disguise and ordering chicken nuggets.
He confessed immediately and lateradmitted the costume was supposed
(18:30):
to quote, throw people off.
It didn't my take Dennis Hawkinsproving that a makeover can't
cover up a lack of planning.
He didn't just leave clues.
He gift wrapped his Id like it wasa thank you card to the police.
Honestly, the Pink Nails had morecommitment to the role than his brain did.
(18:56):
So would you be more distracted bythe fake gun or the hot pink manicure?
Angela (19:02):
Probably the hot pink man is there.
John (19:04):
Probably so.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Angela (19:06):
That was the real picture.
It's the goatee or the
John (19:09):
mustache?
It's the mustache and goatee andthey, yes, it is the real picture.
That is, yeah.
He makes a pretty convincing womanwith facial hair, doesn't he?
So what's the worst disguise thatyou've ever seen outside of Halloween?
Angela (19:24):
Now we have to go back to those people who drew on their face
John (19:27):
a hundred percent.
That's where I was going.
That's gonna be a tough one to top man.
You dry your mask on with a Sharpie.
Yeah.
That's gonna be hard to top.
I'm
Angela (19:36):
doing for help
John (19:37):
drying your mask on with a Sharpie
Angela (19:40):
Uhhuh.
John (19:40):
Good.
I'll be laughing at you till Thanksgiving.
If that's the case,
Angela (19:44):
that's
John (19:44):
what I'm here for because that's where it's still gonna be at Thanksgiving.
What
Angela (19:47):
I am here for.
John (19:49):
So is it still identity theft if you literally hand police your identity?
Angela (19:54):
Yes.
John (19:56):
I mean, oh, these are fun.
This, this one is really good.
Number three, shop with a cop and a crook.
Angela (20:04):
Yes.
John (20:06):
In Oh no.
In Virginia, a man attempted toshoplift from Walmart during the
annual shop with a cop holiday eventwhen the store was absolutely packed
with police officers in December 20.
In the December, 2024 eventwas meant to bring cheer cops,
helping kids pick out gifts.
(20:28):
Instead, it brought comedy when Hector d.
Valid, valid quest.
Decided to tuck stolen merchandiseunder his clothes and try to slip
out unnoticed the overwhelmingpresence of law enforcement.
Didn't.
Didn't deter 30-year-old, 3-year-oldHector from trying to make off with
(20:50):
nearly $1,400 worth of merchandise.
According to police.
Unfortunately for him, the storewas wall to wall with uniformed
officers who spotted him Instantly,he was stopped cuffed and processed
on the spot while families andchildren looked on his arrest.
May have been the fastestturnaround time in Walmart history.
(21:14):
My take this guy basically speed ran.
Basically speed ran, getting arrested.
Imagine being surrounded by 50 copsthinking, nah, I'm built different.
Mm-hmm.
He didn't just pick the wrong time,he picked the wrong holiday special.
Santa brings toys.
Walmart brought handcuffs.
(21:38):
I mean, gives you, it's not like.
It's not like it's a mystery whenone of these events is going on.
It freaking takes over the whole store.
You walk in and there'sfreaking cops everywhere
Angela (21:51):
you come with all their distracted by the kids.
I,
John (21:54):
I don't, I don't think he was thinking at all.
He's
Angela (21:56):
like, no one will know.
Uh,
John (21:59):
so what's worse jail time or kids pointing and laughing
while you're being cuffed?
Angela (22:03):
Kids, kids pointing and laughing.
I think so
John (22:05):
too.
And you know, they were, oh yeah.
You know, that they were, and they'dprobably, a bunch of 'em had cell
phones out videoing the thing.
And yeah,
Angela (22:13):
one or two might have been scared, but the rest of 'em probably mocking him.
Relentless.
John (22:17):
Yep.
So should shop with a cop double hislive entertainment for the public.
Angela (22:22):
I think so.
You should see the body cam footage.
John (22:25):
I a hundred percent agree.
Angela (22:26):
I am so addicted to watching body cam footage videos and I want to see this.
John (22:31):
Yeah, there's some really good ones out there.
So if you were this guy, would youever show your face at Walmart again?
Angela (22:40):
Well, I'm a. I doubt they'll allow him to, but no, I would not,
John (22:44):
I don't think I'd ever show my face in public again
if I was this freaking stupid.
Just,
Angela (22:49):
just move to a different,
John (22:50):
to Antarctica.
Angela (22:51):
Yeah.
There you go.
Or go live with Oo and let him,you know, you can bite each other.
John (22:56):
Right.
Okay.
So you ready for our weird shit section?
Angela (23:00):
It gets weirder.
John (23:02):
It gets weirder.
Angela (23:04):
Settled in.
John (23:14):
Weird shit.
Weird shit.
Number one, crypted edition.
Doghead Humanoids In Pennsylvania,in rural Pennsylvania, multiple
early morning eyewitnesses reportedseeing two pale gray humanoid
figures sprinting across the field.
Their most disturbing feature.
(23:36):
Dog-like hits the accounts,describe the creatures as lean,
hunched, and almost hairless withelongated faces resembling canines.
Locals said that the figures movedunnaturally fast, vanishing into the tree
line before anyone could investigate.
What makes this unsettling is theconsistency of the description.
(23:59):
Witnesses from separate farmsreported the same pale gray coloring,
same height, about six feet tall.
In the same bone chilling dog snouts.
While skeptics point to misidentifiedcoyotes, or even pranksters in masks,
locals remain reluctant to discuss theencounter in small town Pennsylvania.
(24:22):
The phrase Doghead man iswhispered, not shouted.
The case sits in the hazy middleground of folklore and fear.
Might take two doghead, two dogheaddudes booking it through a field.
That's not cryptozoology,that's greyhound.
Cosplay gone wrong.
(24:42):
If I saw one, I'd stop jogging forever.
Imagine explaining toyour insurance company.
Yeah.
Uh, weird looking Beagle traumatized me.
Angela (24:56):
I was just about to ask for, for eat.
Was it?
John (25:00):
So what is scarier?
Doghead.
Humanoids or one chihuahuathat won't stop barking.
Angela (25:06):
I have two chihuahuas that won't stop barking.
I'm gonna choose Chihuahua.
John (25:12):
Yeah, I would take Chihuahua too.
I hate them dogs,
Angela (25:17):
Mr. Turkey.
John (25:18):
They are the devil.
Angela (25:19):
You could only half hate my dogs because they're only half
John (25:24):
any Chihuahua.
I don't care if they'reone 32nd Chihuahua.
So
Angela (25:30):
there's three other dogs in the house you'd like,
John (25:33):
they're not Jamal.
Why do Cryptids always look like animals?
Mixed with unfinished sims characters.
Angela (25:41):
Frankenstein signs, experiments.
John (25:44):
Yeah, I mean, I don't know what to think about this shit.
It's strange for sure.
I've
Angela (25:49):
heard of this one.
John (25:50):
No, I hadn't, neither.
So would you chase after it forproof or no doubt immediately?
I know the answer to this.
Angela (25:59):
I want the proof, but not alone.
John (26:02):
Nope.
I knew you wouldn't.
Angela (26:04):
No.
Take it with, take somebody with me.
But I wanna know.
John (26:06):
I would definitely chase after it.
Definitely.
All right.
Weird shit.
Number two, the historicalWTF, the Kentucky Meat shower
in what?
In March of 1876, Olympia Springs,Kentucky experienced a bizarre storm.
(26:28):
Chunks of raw meat fell from the sky,covering an entire field in slimy flesh.
Witnesses described strips ofstrips and flakes of bloody
meat, the size of playing cards.
Raining down samples were collectedand sent for analysis, though no
one agreed on what the meat was.
(26:50):
Beef, mutton, venison, or even human.
The most widely acceptedexplanation came later.
A flock of vultures, reg regurgitatedtheir mills mid-flight, causing a
grotesque downpour of half digested flesh.
Oh, locals, however, interpretedit as everything from a
(27:11):
divine warning to a miracle.
Some even fired up the sky meatto see some even fried up the sky.
Neat to see what it tasted like.
Reports say that it was chewy, very chewy.
Might take Kentucky, where sometimes thechicken doesn't fall fried, it falls raw.
(27:35):
This is the only weather forecast worsethan cloudy with a chance of meatballs,
and to the locals who tasted it.
Y'all are built differently.
Angela (27:49):
I have issues.
John (27:52):
Would you dare to eat mystery sky meat?
Do you have to ask
Angela (27:56):
me that
John (27:56):
question?
Yeah.
I mean, neither.
Angela (28:01):
I won't eat anything 10 minutes after the sell by date.
John (28:04):
I, wow.
It's
Angela (28:06):
not happening.
Not happening.
John (28:08):
You know, I mean, it's, oh my God.
It's interesting and it's fascinating,but when they got to the eating
part, I was like, okay, fuck you.
What too much.
Fuck you too much.
So what's worse?
Raining frogs, rainingblood or raining beef jerky?
Angela (28:29):
Um, I was, I'm gonna go with blood.
John (28:35):
I think I'd have to go with meat.
Yeah.
Raw meat from this guy.
That's pretty freaking nasty.
Angela (28:41):
Well, at first when you started reading it, I was thinking
something ran into a play.
John (28:46):
It was in 1876.
Angela (28:51):
No.
John (28:51):
19.
Don't you know,
I don't think it raninto a plane just saying
Angela (29:00):
futuristic.
John (29:02):
Yeah, very.
Angela (29:03):
Oh,
John (29:04):
should vultures issue weather alerts before vomiting
and, yeah, on entire counties.
Yeah.
Angela (29:10):
It be in writing.
It needs to be approved.
John (29:13):
I have a really hard time.
I have a really hard timewith that explanation.
I mean,
Angela (29:19):
yeah,
John (29:19):
you know, I have seen a lot of vultures.
I've never seen them in huge,huge flocks like geese and stuff.
I've seen several flying together, butI've never seen enough that if they all
puked, it would cover an entire field.
So I have a hard timewith that explanation.
I gotta say, it's gottabe something different.
Angela (29:38):
I'm gonna tell you, if this happens in Wyoming, I'm
a hundred percent agoraphobic.
After that, I'm justnever leaving my house.
John (29:45):
I might be with you on that one, man.
This would be a tough one to get over.
Angela (29:49):
We have to record from inside my,
John (29:50):
yeah.
Okay.
Weird shit.
Number three, the Bostonmolasses flood of 1919.
In 1919, a giant storage tank ruptured inBoston, releasing a sticky tidal wave of
2.5 million gallons of molasses destroyingbuildings and killing 21 people.
(30:14):
The 50 foot tall steel tank burstwith explosive force unleashing
a 25 foot high wall of molasses.
Traveling at 35 miles an hourthrough the north end, entire
buildings were flattened.
Horses drowned in syrup, anddebris was carried for blocks.
(30:36):
The disaster left 21 dead 150 injured andcaused millions of dollars in damages.
Cleanup took months and theneighborhood smelled like
molasses for decades afterwards.
Reports claim you could still catchthe scent on a hot summer day in
the 1960s, the tragedy became astrange mix of horror and absurdity
(31:02):
forever remembered as one of the.
Oddest industrial accidentsin American history.
My take.
Imagine surviving a world war onlyto be steamrolled by pancake topping.
Boston had the first true stickysituation and we're still making syrup,
(31:23):
jokes about it a hundred years later.
That's not history.
That's karma with a sweet tooth.
Angela (31:31):
Are.
John (31:32):
Yeah.
Have you heard of this before?
I have
Angela (31:34):
not.
John (31:34):
Yeah.
I've
Angela (31:35):
been horrified.
I'm sad that I'm mortified morefor the horses than the humans.
Why is that happening to me all the time?
John (31:42):
I don't know.
I mean, I, have you beenaround molasses much?
Not a lot.
So molasses you use a lot andlike livestock feed and stuff, so
I've been around molasses quitea bit and it is such a thanks.
Sticky.
I cannot imagine the mess.
I brown sugar.
I can't even, I can't evenimagine cleaning this.
(32:05):
How, I don't even know howyou'd, where you'd start.
You just burn it down, I guess something.
So should Boston add world stickiestCity to its tourism brochures?
Oh, I think so too.
Earned it.
So what's the most cursed waythat you could sweeten your
coffee with this story in mind?
Angela (32:26):
I don't know, but I would use molasses in coffee, but
John (32:31):
I don't know.
I don't sweeten my coffee,so I definitely wouldn't.
But molasses is pretty tasty.
Yeah.
All right.
You ready for weird shit number four?
Okay.
Jeff, the talking mongoose in that.
In the 1930s, a family on theaisle of man claimed their
(32:53):
farmhouse was haunted by Jeff.
A talking invisible mongoosewho insulted people, recited
poetry, and revealed secrets.
Angela (33:04):
It was me.
It wasn't Jeff.
John (33:06):
It was you.
Angela (33:07):
It was me.
Insult
John (33:09):
in the 1930s.
Yeah.
You're looking pretty good for your age.
I gotta say,
Angela (33:13):
it's about time.
Someone said something.
John (33:16):
The Irving family swore that their home was plagued by Jeff sometimes heard
as disembodied chatter, sometimes glimpsedas a small animal darting in the shadows.
He allegedly called himself aquote, extra clever mongoose.
Born in India in 1852.
(33:37):
Jeff would relay gossip about neighbors,torment the family with rude jokes,
and occasionally predict future events.
Paranormal investigators came tostudy the case leaving baffled.
Was Jeff a hoax, a poltergeist,or a very strange mass delusion?
To this day, Jeff remains one of theoldest cases in paranormal history.
(34:00):
Not terrifying, but deeply weird.
And I met oddest, not oldest.
So my take, forget demons and ghosts.
These people got haunted bya standup comic mongoose.
Imagine your Poltergeistisn't slamming doors.
It's roasting your haircut.
Yeah.
Jeff wasn't supernatural.
He was just the world'sfirst heckler ghost.
Angela (34:24):
I'm telling your secrets
John (34:26):
right.
So, which is worst?
A ghost that scares youor one that roasts you?
Yeah, I, I mean, this isa weird freaking story.
I, I don't even know what to say.
Angela (34:37):
Your ghost is making fun of you
John (34:39):
if your ghost is a mongoose,
Angela (34:41):
right?
Sure.
And Jeff,
John (34:43):
so if Jeff really was a mongoose, does that make him
the first Crypted podcaster?
Yes.
I love it.
So need him for the museum.
I agree.
Would you rather live withJeff or move out immediately?
Angela (35:00):
Live with Jeff?
John (35:01):
I probably would live with Jeff too, honestly.
Yeah.
Angela (35:04):
Yeah.
Tell me stories.
John (35:05):
Right.
Okay.
Weird shit.
Number five, modern mystery.
The watcher of Westfield, New Jersey.
Angela (35:16):
The house.
Yes, I know this one.
John (35:19):
A New Jersey family bought their dream home only to receive
terrifying letters from someonecalling themselves the watcher.
Shortly after moving into thehouse in 2014, the broadest family
began receiving anonymous letters.
The writer claimed to be tasked withwatching the home for decades, obsessively
(35:40):
mentioning the children, the house'ssecrets, and a coming second coming.
The tone grew more threatening,and the family became so frightened
they never fully moved in.
Despite extensive police investigationsand even Netflix, dramatizations the
Watcher's, identity remains a mystery.
(36:02):
Some theories point to neighbors,others to real estate grudges, but no
one has ever been caught to this day.
The case stands as one ofsuburbia, strangest, unsolved
stalker mysteries might take.
Buying a house in New Jersey is alreadya horror story at a stalker calling
(36:23):
themselves the watcher, and you'vegot discount Stephen King fanatic.
Forget lawn gnomes.
I'd burn the place to the ground.
So you know this story?
Yeah.
And what are your thoughts?
It's
Angela (36:37):
creepy as shit.
John (36:38):
It's creepy as shit.
Angela (36:40):
And dedication because years.
John (36:43):
Yeah.
So would you still move in ifthe mortgage was dirt cheap?
Nope.
Yeah.
This one, I gotta say thisis he knew where, what
Angela (36:51):
rooms the kids were in.
John (36:53):
This brings up like Major Danny Laplant kind of vibes, right?
Like somebody in the walls,like no, I mean, I don't know
about the paranormal aspect.
This gives me like creepy stalker vibes.
Angela (37:06):
You know what rooms the kids were in?
He kept calling him new blood.
John (37:10):
Nope.
Yuck.
Nope.
So what's scarier?
A stalker who hides outside your houseor one who hides in your mailbox.
Angela (37:19):
Hmm.
Probably the mailbox.
'cause they never see him.
John (37:24):
Yeah.
I mean, yeah.
I don't know this, thisfreaking story creeps me.
No thanks.
Creepy.
Angela (37:30):
Yeah.
John (37:31):
So if you were the watcher, what pity things would
you rate to freak people out?
Angela (37:39):
Tough.
Change your smoke alarm, batteries.
John (37:43):
Yeah, I mean, I think that the dude probably covered the
creepy better than I possibly could.
Mm-hmm.
Because it is creepy.
So,
Angela (37:53):
yeah.
John (37:55):
But with that we have the black screen.
The black screen, which means that'sall I put together for us tonight.
So do you have anything to add?
No.
Alright.
Well that closes out this episode ofDark Dialogue Shadow Chat Sessions,
and we thank you all for joining usand if you like what we do and have how
we do it, please give us a thumbs up.
(38:18):
Hit that bell if you'relistening on YouTube, subscribe.
Even review.
If you're on Spotify or ApplePodcasts, share the show.
All of that helps us more thanyou could possibly imagine.
You can check out all of our moreserious shows and you can find
all of them@darkdialogue.com.
They're available on every placethat you stream your podcast.
(38:39):
You can reach out to us atinfo@darkdialog.com with case
suggestions or funny shit.
Weird shit, strange shit, whatevershit you want us to talk about
or just pictures encrypted.
Send us pictures of Cryptics.
Tell us hello, whatever.
We read everything that you send to us,and that again is info@darkdialog.com.
If you want to support the show,you can find us on Patreon, on
(39:00):
coffee, and you, you can subscribeto our substack@substack.com.
So without anything else to add, no.
Alright, well have a wonderful night.
Angela (39:11):
Stay saved everybody.
Okay, and welcome to another episode of Dark Dialogue Shadow Chat Sessions.
I am your host, John,
Angela (00:20):
honor, and laughing.
Angela, I was sitting over here all tense.
I was like, you gotta do something funny.
Gonna do it.
John (00:27):
So this is the, obviously the.
Show where we talk about strange shit.
Dumb, dumb shit, weird shit.
All the shits.
And we just kinda let our hair downif we have hair, for those of us
that don't, we let our goatees downand just kinda have fun with it all
and not worry about a whole lot.
So Angela, how's it going tonight?
Angela (00:47):
It's going well.
It's going well.
How are you?
John (00:49):
I'm great.
Yeah, I'm really good.
Absolutely.
No complaints on my side.
So we ready?
We haven't done one ofthese for a while, so.
Yeah.
Are you ready to jump into this?
I
Angela (01:00):
am, absolutely.
A hundred percent.
John (01:02):
Okay, perfect.
Well, as always, in case you forgot,
Angela (01:06):
I'm loving the cheesy DJ work,
John (01:07):
we start with the strange headline segment.
Angela (01:19):
Bring it on.
John (01:20):
Strange headline is Man bitten by Panda at Zoo Bites Panda back.
In rare case of mutual munchies,
Angela (01:29):
it's only fair.
John (01:31):
So in one of the strangest zoo incidents on record, a man in China
was bitten by a panda during a closeencounter and bit the panda back.
This rare case of a mutualmunchies left everyone confused
and the internet howling.
According to reports, the incidenthappened at the Beijing Zoo, the
(01:54):
man, a tourist allegedly climbedinto the pan, the panda enclosure
to play with the animal, the panda.
A male named Gogo, understandablyreacted by biting his visitor on the leg.
In panic or a strange flex, the man bitthe panda back on the arm later, telling
(02:16):
police that he didn't want to lose zoostaff quickly separated them, and both
survived though the man was hospitalizedand the panda was probably just annoyed.
This wasn't even Gogo'sfirst bite in the incident.
The Panda had previously bittentwo other trespassers in separate
(02:37):
events, cementing his reputation asthe Mike Tyson of the Bamboo eaters.
My take, this guy climbed intoa pandas house, got chopped
and said, I'm gonna chomp back.
That's not courage.
That's chaotic.
Natural energy.
Pandas.
Eat bamboo, bro, not tourists.
(03:00):
And if the pandas sues,I hope to hell he wins.
So should biting back be consideredself-defense or just a stupid escalation?
Angela (03:12):
Stupid escalation.
He climbed in and dude was defending.
It was Castle Doctrine.
John (03:17):
It was absolutely Castle Doctrine.
And let me just go on record.
If you climb into an enclosure ata zoo, you deserve to be bitty.
Yes, a hundred percent
Angela (03:31):
falling in is different.
Climbing in bad,
John (03:33):
totally bad.
And by the way, thatwas an actual picture.
That's Gogo the panda and this nutbar that freaking climbed in there.
So
Angela (03:42):
think the Panda should have been the guy named Google.
John (03:46):
Yeah, you might, you might be onto something there actually.
So why do people think that Pandas arejust cuddly, black and white Labradors?
Angela (03:57):
I mean, they don't look cuddly.
John (04:00):
They're not cuddly,
Angela (04:02):
but they look, it looks so you see,
John (04:05):
I guess so.
But these are the sameidiots that try to, I'm not
Angela (04:08):
climbing in
John (04:08):
pet, the Buffalo and Yellowstone Park, so
Angela (04:12):
they don't look as cuddly as a fan of them,
John (04:16):
maybe.
I don't know.
So what's the wildest animal that youdare to bite back if it bit you first?
I have bit dogs back.
I definitely have, yes.
Okay.
(04:36):
Alright, so you're readyfor the conspiracy corner?
Yes.
Okay, so
Paul is dead.
Angela (04:49):
Did you hear, sorry, I'm gonna interrupt.
Why are people saying Ohio doesn't exist?
John (04:54):
I have no idea.
Angela (04:55):
Okay.
Anyway, go ahead.
John (04:57):
So one of the one of rock's most enduring conspiracy theories
claims that Paul McCartney died in1966 and was replaced by a double.
Fans believed that the Beatlesleft cryptic clues in their songs.
And Alba Art sparking decades ofspeculation, the Paul is Dead Theory
(05:17):
exploded in 1969 when a Detroit DJaired a rumor that McCartney had been
killed in a car crash and replacedwith a lookalike named William Camp.
William Campbell.
Listeners began combingBeatles albums for evidence.
They pointed to the Abbey Roadcover where Paul walks barefoot
(05:38):
out of the step with the otherBeatle out of step with the other.
Beatles interpreted as afuneral procession and.
To the back cover of Sergeant Pepper,where Paul faces away from the camera
lyrics like the walrus was Paul andbackward masked messages were said to be
(06:00):
confessions despite endless debunking.
And Paul himself joking about it saying.
I'm alive and well.
The theory persists mutating intonew forms on Reddit and YouTube.
Some believe the Rick,the lookalikes real name.
Some insist his voice changed and othersclaim that he dropped hints in interviews.
(06:23):
My take, this is the OG CelebrityClone Conspiracy before Avril Levine,
Britney Spears and TikTok Body Doubles.
It's basically 1960s Reddit.
A bunch of people readingtoo much into album art.
Instead of working if Paulwas replaced, his double wrote
some of the best music ever.
(06:45):
So honestly, I'm fine with it.
Angela (06:47):
Exactly.
Who cares?
John (06:50):
So if your favorite celebrity died and was replaced, would you
want to know or just enjoy the music?
Angela (06:56):
Just enjoy the music.
John (06:58):
Yeah, just wanna know.
I mean, it would be so freakingdifficult to replace a musician,
like, no, like that, you know, I mean.
You know, every guitarist, everybassist, every drummer has a very
unique style that people, if they'refamous, try to mimic and try to mimic.
(07:22):
But if I hear JamesHetfield playing guitar.
I know it's James Feld, right?
Like there is no doubt Tonyomi, same freaking thing.
I mean, I could go on and on andyeah, you can learn to play their
music and you can learn to imitateit really well, but it's different.
Angela (07:40):
There's,
John (07:40):
it's different.
I mean,
Angela (07:43):
yeah.
Even if you play
John (07:45):
it like quote unquote, flawlessly.
Yeah.
You can tell the difference.
I don't care.
And maybe it's just a, as a guitarist,you can, you can hear it, but there's
no possible way that you couldpull some shit like that off I, no.
Possible way.
Right.
And vocalists are exactly the same way.
Maybe the one exception is theFilipino kid that took over as
(08:08):
lead singer of journey 'cause Wow.
Oh, that's freaking impressive.
Angela (08:17):
But you still can tell is not.
John (08:19):
Absolutely a hundred percent.
Yeah.
So why do so many conspiracytheories hinge on hidden clues in
album covers and shit like that?
Angela (08:31):
Because everybody likes to be Sherlock Holmes.
Everybody likes to be theone that broke the case.
John (08:38):
And you know what's funny about this whole thing is it
persisted, but alvamar disappeared.
And that's a real tragedy, right?
A real freaking tragedy.
Because I can remember as a kid just goingover the freaking album, Martin, and a lot
of the times they would hide shit in albumart and you would like look through them
Angela (08:59):
not, but
John (08:59):
no, just like hidden little things, you know?
Angela (09:02):
Yeah.
Yeah.
John (09:03):
And then you would get, a lot of the times the album
would have the lyrics in it.
And this was before the internet, soyou can actually figure out what they
were saying, that it's dirty deedsdone dirt cheap and not dirty deeds.
Dunder cheese, like a friendof mine thought it was So
Angela (09:19):
there's not a bathroom on the right.
Yeah.
John (09:21):
Yes.
So should replacement Paul havestarted a sideand called Foe Beetles.
Angela (09:27):
Yes,
John (09:28):
I agree.
Angela (09:30):
Damnit, why are we leaving money on the table?
John (09:33):
You know what, the funniest thing about this is, if the Beatles
were gonna replace somebody,wouldn't it have been linen?
I'm just, I'm just saying it would've,that one would've been logical, right?
But no, they pick a guy that didn'tdie and say he did die, instead of
just saying, yeah, I don't know.
(09:54):
Yeah.
Okay.
You ready for the Reddit Rabbit Hole
Angela (09:57):
afternoon there?
John (10:02):
Paris Catacombs portal.
Oh, the Reddit user.
A Reddit user claims to be on a missionto seal a mysterious portal in the Paris
Catacombs warning of interdimensionalcreatures poised to escape their obsessive
posts blend, urgent calls to action with asurreal narrative of underground warfare.
(10:26):
The saga began on.
Our urban ex exploration where usersshared grainy photos of a sealed off
chamber deep in the Paris catacombs.
They claimed that they had discoveredactive, an active portal emitting low
frequency sounds and strange air currents.
(10:46):
Soon the post moved to our conspiracy andour high strangeness with increasingly
frantic updates about quote creaturespushing at the wall and quote, ritual
seals weakening other redditors.
Alternated between mocking theop, encouraging the delusion,
(11:08):
and begging for live streams.
Some users tried to fact check thecoordinates, but the catacombs are
so sprawling and so dangerous thatverifying anything was nearly impossible.
The thread has become a rabbit,rabbit hole, Reddit rabbit hole of
maps, alleged signals and theoriesabout secret French government
(11:31):
task forces monitoring the portal.
My take, this is peak.
Reddit.
Someone finds a hole, declares it tobe a portal to hell, and suddenly we're
in season three of stranger things.
The only monsters in the catacombsare mold and unpaid tour guides.
But sure, keep sealingyour imaginary gate hero.
Angela (11:54):
It's the upside down.
John (11:56):
It's the upside down.
I mean, as if the catacombs inParis were not creepy enough.
Exactly.
Being lined with humanskulls and shit like that.
Really?
That's, yeah.
That's creepy enough.
Angela (12:07):
That is creepy enough.
And some people may hate me, butthat's the only reason I go to Paris.
John (12:13):
Yeah, me too.
Honestly, I don't have alot of love for France.
I gotta tell you.
Angela (12:18):
They're for the culture and the other things that
everybody goes Paris for as.
Maybe the key chain bridge, but that's it.
John (12:29):
The whaty what?
Angela (12:30):
Just like isn't there a lock pit bridge in there?
Or is that not?
Am I in the wrong?
John (12:35):
Uh oh, maybe.
I think I know what you're talking about.
Yeah, just go to Loveland.
They have a big heart.
You can do the samething on it's way closer.
You don't have to go to France, get a
Angela (12:45):
passport or fly.
John (12:48):
So would you rather explore the Paris catacombs or the back rooms?
Angela (12:54):
The categories.
John (12:55):
Me too.
A hundred percent.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah, it is kind of on my bucket list.
I really want to see it.
I, I absolutely love history and to behonest, there's a lot of freaking cool
castles and shit like that in France.
It's a very, very, very old countrywith, you know, a lot of history there.
So if it wasn't filled with Frenchpeople, sorry, no offense, but.
(13:19):
If it wasn't filled with French people,it would be a lot more inviting to me.
So it's kinda like vertical limit.
Have you seen the movie Vertical Limit?
Angela (13:27):
Oh, might I get in trouble again?
John (13:29):
Yeah, you should get in trouble 'cause it's a damn good movie.
But anyway, the dude in there says,talking about this woman and he says
she's French Canadian some days.
She's Canadian.
She's quite pleasant today.
She's obviously French.
Angela (13:44):
Hello dog.
John (13:47):
So why do portal stories always involve underground spaces?
Bates basements, tunnels, catacombs.
Angela (13:57):
Fair?
John (13:58):
Yeah.
See
Angela (13:59):
I do not,
John (14:02):
the one that doesn't is the Stanley Hotel.
Oh, true.
They could potentiallybe onto something there.
I don't know, but
Angela (14:08):
Well, they think the cosmos are portals and those aren't.
John (14:12):
What's that?
I don't even know what that is.
Angela (14:14):
Have you never been to the cosmos in something Dakota?
John (14:18):
Maybe like
Angela (14:19):
water up.
John (14:20):
Oh, that weird ass place.
Yeah, I think I was when I was a kid,but I, I know what you're talking about.
Yeah.
So what's the best way to tell ifyou're mysterious hole is actually a
supernatural threat or just bad plumbing?
Angela (14:35):
Paul, over
John (14:37):
I, I would say so.
Yeah.
Okay.
Are we ready for our dip shit's?
Diaries
dip shit.
Diaries dip shit.
Diary number one, the selfie burglar.
(14:59):
Ashley Keats.
Rotherham England Burg Burglar.
Ashley Keast couldn't resisttaking a selfie inside the
very house that he was robbing.
Unfortunately, the photo automaticallysent itself to the victim's work
colleagues outing him instantly.
(15:20):
So Keast broke into a home in 2014and stole jewelry, electronics, and a
luxury Rolex Wash Watch worth 4,000.
The funny little lha thing, whatthe hell do they use in England now?
Pound.
Are they back to pounds?
I don't know.
Back to pounds in Sterling.
'cause they were Euros, but they left.
(15:41):
I don't, so I didn't know if they wentback to like the pound, the British
pound, or if it was something else.
Angela (15:46):
The only thing I've heard recently, somebody tell us.
John (15:48):
So 4,000
Angela (15:49):
and tell
John (15:50):
us 4,000 British pounds we'll say.
So while rummaging, he popped astolen sim card into his own phone
and took a triumphant selfie.
The photo didn't just stay on his phone.
It sent itself through WhatsApp,landing right in the inboxes
of the victim's coworkers.
They contacted the police whoarrested Keast at his home.
(16:13):
Shortly afterward, officers foundthe Rolex hidden behind a radiator
along with other stolen goods.
He pled guilty and was sentenced totwo years and eight months in prison.
The judge might as well havecharged him with criminal idiocy.
I idiocy in the first degree.
My take.
(16:34):
You know that you're bad at crimewhen your victim's coworkers
see your selfie before your own,before you're even done burglary.
Imagine explaining that in prison.
Yeah.
I got busted by WhatsApp, markZuckerberg basically snitched me out.
Angela (16:53):
Damn it, mark.
And they'll never lookbehind the radiator.
John (16:56):
Never.
So should phones come with a warning labelthat says may ruin your burglary career?
Angela (17:03):
Yes.
John (17:05):
I mean, I don't, uh, there's, there's no words.
Is the real crime here arroganceor just bad dad Data plans.
Angela (17:17):
Hmm.
Oh,
John (17:21):
I think it's just being an idiot.
No,
Angela (17:23):
actually, yeah, being an idiot.
But a bad data play, that's notthe crime, that's the punishment.
John (17:30):
You might be onto something.
So would you rather be caught onCCTV or by your own selfie, CCTV
100% without a freaking doubt.
Okay, next up we have DennisHawkins Bank, robber Barbie.
Angela (17:47):
Oh, I didn't have that one
John (17:49):
in Ohio.
Dennis Hawkins robbed a bank whiledressed as a woman complete with wig,
fake breasts and bright pink nail polish.
Yes, his disguised didn't last long.
Once police found his ownID in the getaway car.
Oh man.
Hawkins entered the bank in 2010,dressed in drag and wielding a toy gun.
(18:10):
He got away with some money,but in his stolen vehicle, he
left behind his driver's licenseand other personal belongings.
Police tracked him down at a nearby fastfood restaurant where he was still wearing
the disguise and ordering chicken nuggets.
He confessed immediately and lateradmitted the costume was supposed
(18:30):
to quote, throw people off.
It didn't my take Dennis Hawkinsproving that a makeover can't
cover up a lack of planning.
He didn't just leave clues.
He gift wrapped his Id like it wasa thank you card to the police.
Honestly, the Pink Nails had morecommitment to the role than his brain did.
(18:56):
So would you be more distracted bythe fake gun or the hot pink manicure?
Angela (19:02):
Probably the hot pink man is there.
John (19:04):
Probably so.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Angela (19:06):
That was the real picture.
It's the goatee or the
John (19:09):
mustache?
It's the mustache and goatee andthey, yes, it is the real picture.
That is, yeah.
He makes a pretty convincing womanwith facial hair, doesn't he?
So what's the worst disguise thatyou've ever seen outside of Halloween?
Angela (19:24):
Now we have to go back to those people who drew on their face
John (19:27):
a hundred percent.
That's where I was going.
That's gonna be a tough one to top man.
You dry your mask on with a Sharpie.
Yeah.
That's gonna be hard to top.
I'm
Angela (19:36):
doing for help
John (19:37):
drying your mask on with a Sharpie
Angela (19:40):
Uhhuh.
John (19:40):
Good.
I'll be laughing at you till Thanksgiving.
If that's the case,
Angela (19:44):
that's
John (19:44):
what I'm here for because that's where it's still gonna be at Thanksgiving.
What
Angela (19:47):
I am here for.
John (19:49):
So is it still identity theft if you literally hand police your identity?
Angela (19:54):
Yes.
John (19:56):
I mean, oh, these are fun.
This, this one is really good.
Number three, shop with a cop and a crook.
Angela (20:04):
Yes.
John (20:06):
In Oh no.
In Virginia, a man attempted toshoplift from Walmart during the
annual shop with a cop holiday eventwhen the store was absolutely packed
with police officers in December 20.
In the December, 2024 eventwas meant to bring cheer cops,
helping kids pick out gifts.
(20:28):
Instead, it brought comedy when Hector d.
Valid, valid quest.
Decided to tuck stolen merchandiseunder his clothes and try to slip
out unnoticed the overwhelmingpresence of law enforcement.
Didn't.
Didn't deter 30-year-old, 3-year-oldHector from trying to make off with
(20:50):
nearly $1,400 worth of merchandise.
According to police.
Unfortunately for him, the storewas wall to wall with uniformed
officers who spotted him Instantly,he was stopped cuffed and processed
on the spot while families andchildren looked on his arrest.
May have been the fastestturnaround time in Walmart history.
(21:14):
My take this guy basically speed ran.
Basically speed ran, getting arrested.
Imagine being surrounded by 50 copsthinking, nah, I'm built different.
Mm-hmm.
He didn't just pick the wrong time,he picked the wrong holiday special.
Santa brings toys.
Walmart brought handcuffs.
(21:38):
I mean, gives you, it's not like.
It's not like it's a mystery whenone of these events is going on.
It freaking takes over the whole store.
You walk in and there'sfreaking cops everywhere
Angela (21:51):
you come with all their distracted by the kids.
I,
John (21:54):
I don't, I don't think he was thinking at all.
He's
Angela (21:56):
like, no one will know.
Uh,
John (21:59):
so what's worse jail time or kids pointing and laughing
while you're being cuffed?
Angela (22:03):
Kids, kids pointing and laughing.
I think so
John (22:05):
too.
And you know, they were, oh yeah.
You know, that they were, and they'dprobably, a bunch of 'em had cell
phones out videoing the thing.
And yeah,
Angela (22:13):
one or two might have been scared, but the rest of 'em probably mocking him.
Relentless.
John (22:17):
Yep.
So should shop with a cop double hislive entertainment for the public.
Angela (22:22):
I think so.
You should see the body cam footage.
John (22:25):
I a hundred percent agree.
Angela (22:26):
I am so addicted to watching body cam footage videos and I want to see this.
John (22:31):
Yeah, there's some really good ones out there.
So if you were this guy, would youever show your face at Walmart again?
Angela (22:40):
Well, I'm a. I doubt they'll allow him to, but no, I would not,
John (22:44):
I don't think I'd ever show my face in public again
if I was this freaking stupid.
Just,
Angela (22:49):
just move to a different,
John (22:50):
to Antarctica.
Angela (22:51):
Yeah.
There you go.
Or go live with Oo and let him,you know, you can bite each other.
John (22:56):
Right.
Okay.
So you ready for our weird shit section?
Angela (23:00):
It gets weirder.
John (23:02):
It gets weirder.
Angela (23:04):
Settled in.
John (23:14):
Weird shit.
Weird shit.
Number one, crypted edition.
Doghead Humanoids In Pennsylvania,in rural Pennsylvania, multiple
early morning eyewitnesses reportedseeing two pale gray humanoid
figures sprinting across the field.
Their most disturbing feature.
(23:36):
Dog-like hits the accounts,describe the creatures as lean,
hunched, and almost hairless withelongated faces resembling canines.
Locals said that the figures movedunnaturally fast, vanishing into the tree
line before anyone could investigate.
What makes this unsettling is theconsistency of the description.
(23:59):
Witnesses from separate farmsreported the same pale gray coloring,
same height, about six feet tall.
In the same bone chilling dog snouts.
While skeptics point to misidentifiedcoyotes, or even pranksters in masks,
locals remain reluctant to discuss theencounter in small town Pennsylvania.
(24:22):
The phrase Doghead man iswhispered, not shouted.
The case sits in the hazy middleground of folklore and fear.
Might take two doghead, two dogheaddudes booking it through a field.
That's not cryptozoology,that's greyhound.
Cosplay gone wrong.
(24:42):
If I saw one, I'd stop jogging forever.
Imagine explaining toyour insurance company.
Yeah.
Uh, weird looking Beagle traumatized me.
Angela (24:56):
I was just about to ask for, for eat.
Was it?
John (25:00):
So what is scarier?
Doghead.
Humanoids or one chihuahuathat won't stop barking.
Angela (25:06):
I have two chihuahuas that won't stop barking.
I'm gonna choose Chihuahua.
John (25:12):
Yeah, I would take Chihuahua too.
I hate them dogs,
Angela (25:17):
Mr. Turkey.
John (25:18):
They are the devil.
Angela (25:19):
You could only half hate my dogs because they're only half
John (25:24):
any Chihuahua.
I don't care if they'reone 32nd Chihuahua.
So
Angela (25:30):
there's three other dogs in the house you'd like,
John (25:33):
they're not Jamal.
Why do Cryptids always look like animals?
Mixed with unfinished sims characters.
Angela (25:41):
Frankenstein signs, experiments.
John (25:44):
Yeah, I mean, I don't know what to think about this shit.
It's strange for sure.
I've
Angela (25:49):
heard of this one.
John (25:50):
No, I hadn't, neither.
So would you chase after it forproof or no doubt immediately?
I know the answer to this.
Angela (25:59):
I want the proof, but not alone.
John (26:02):
Nope.
I knew you wouldn't.
Angela (26:04):
No.
Take it with, take somebody with me.
But I wanna know.
John (26:06):
I would definitely chase after it.
Definitely.
All right.
Weird shit.
Number two, the historicalWTF, the Kentucky Meat shower
in what?
In March of 1876, Olympia Springs,Kentucky experienced a bizarre storm.
(26:28):
Chunks of raw meat fell from the sky,covering an entire field in slimy flesh.
Witnesses described strips ofstrips and flakes of bloody
meat, the size of playing cards.
Raining down samples were collectedand sent for analysis, though no
one agreed on what the meat was.
(26:50):
Beef, mutton, venison, or even human.
The most widely acceptedexplanation came later.
A flock of vultures, reg regurgitatedtheir mills mid-flight, causing a
grotesque downpour of half digested flesh.
Oh, locals, however, interpretedit as everything from a
(27:11):
divine warning to a miracle.
Some even fired up the sky meatto see some even fried up the sky.
Neat to see what it tasted like.
Reports say that it was chewy, very chewy.
Might take Kentucky, where sometimes thechicken doesn't fall fried, it falls raw.
(27:35):
This is the only weather forecast worsethan cloudy with a chance of meatballs,
and to the locals who tasted it.
Y'all are built differently.
Angela (27:49):
I have issues.
John (27:52):
Would you dare to eat mystery sky meat?
Do you have to ask
Angela (27:56):
me that
John (27:56):
question?
Yeah.
I mean, neither.
Angela (28:01):
I won't eat anything 10 minutes after the sell by date.
John (28:04):
I, wow.
It's
Angela (28:06):
not happening.
Not happening.
John (28:08):
You know, I mean, it's, oh my God.
It's interesting and it's fascinating,but when they got to the eating
part, I was like, okay, fuck you.
What too much.
Fuck you too much.
So what's worse?
Raining frogs, rainingblood or raining beef jerky?
Angela (28:29):
Um, I was, I'm gonna go with blood.
John (28:35):
I think I'd have to go with meat.
Yeah.
Raw meat from this guy.
That's pretty freaking nasty.
Angela (28:41):
Well, at first when you started reading it, I was thinking
something ran into a play.
John (28:46):
It was in 1876.
Angela (28:51):
No.
John (28:51):
19.
Don't you know,
I don't think it raninto a plane just saying
Angela (29:00):
futuristic.
John (29:02):
Yeah, very.
Angela (29:03):
Oh,
John (29:04):
should vultures issue weather alerts before vomiting
and, yeah, on entire counties.
Yeah.
Angela (29:10):
It be in writing.
It needs to be approved.
John (29:13):
I have a really hard time.
I have a really hard timewith that explanation.
I mean,
Angela (29:19):
yeah,
John (29:19):
you know, I have seen a lot of vultures.
I've never seen them in huge,huge flocks like geese and stuff.
I've seen several flying together, butI've never seen enough that if they all
puked, it would cover an entire field.
So I have a hard timewith that explanation.
I gotta say, it's gottabe something different.
Angela (29:38):
I'm gonna tell you, if this happens in Wyoming, I'm
a hundred percent agoraphobic.
After that, I'm justnever leaving my house.
John (29:45):
I might be with you on that one, man.
This would be a tough one to get over.
Angela (29:49):
We have to record from inside my,
John (29:50):
yeah.
Okay.
Weird shit.
Number three, the Bostonmolasses flood of 1919.
In 1919, a giant storage tank ruptured inBoston, releasing a sticky tidal wave of
2.5 million gallons of molasses destroyingbuildings and killing 21 people.
(30:14):
The 50 foot tall steel tank burstwith explosive force unleashing
a 25 foot high wall of molasses.
Traveling at 35 miles an hourthrough the north end, entire
buildings were flattened.
Horses drowned in syrup, anddebris was carried for blocks.
(30:36):
The disaster left 21 dead 150 injured andcaused millions of dollars in damages.
Cleanup took months and theneighborhood smelled like
molasses for decades afterwards.
Reports claim you could still catchthe scent on a hot summer day in
the 1960s, the tragedy became astrange mix of horror and absurdity
(31:02):
forever remembered as one of the.
Oddest industrial accidentsin American history.
My take.
Imagine surviving a world war onlyto be steamrolled by pancake topping.
Boston had the first true stickysituation and we're still making syrup,
(31:23):
jokes about it a hundred years later.
That's not history.
That's karma with a sweet tooth.
Angela (31:31):
Are.
John (31:32):
Yeah.
Have you heard of this before?
I have
Angela (31:34):
not.
John (31:34):
Yeah.
I've
Angela (31:35):
been horrified.
I'm sad that I'm mortified morefor the horses than the humans.
Why is that happening to me all the time?
John (31:42):
I don't know.
I mean, I, have you beenaround molasses much?
Not a lot.
So molasses you use a lot andlike livestock feed and stuff, so
I've been around molasses quitea bit and it is such a thanks.
Sticky.
I cannot imagine the mess.
I brown sugar.
I can't even, I can't evenimagine cleaning this.
(32:05):
How, I don't even know howyou'd, where you'd start.
You just burn it down, I guess something.
So should Boston add world stickiestCity to its tourism brochures?
Oh, I think so too.
Earned it.
So what's the most cursed waythat you could sweeten your
coffee with this story in mind?
Angela (32:26):
I don't know, but I would use molasses in coffee, but
John (32:31):
I don't know.
I don't sweeten my coffee,so I definitely wouldn't.
But molasses is pretty tasty.
Yeah.
All right.
You ready for weird shit number four?
Okay.
Jeff, the talking mongoose in that.
In the 1930s, a family on theaisle of man claimed their
(32:53):
farmhouse was haunted by Jeff.
A talking invisible mongoosewho insulted people, recited
poetry, and revealed secrets.
Angela (33:04):
It was me.
It wasn't Jeff.
John (33:06):
It was you.
Angela (33:07):
It was me.
Insult
John (33:09):
in the 1930s.
Yeah.
You're looking pretty good for your age.
I gotta say,
Angela (33:13):
it's about time.
Someone said something.
John (33:16):
The Irving family swore that their home was plagued by Jeff sometimes heard
as disembodied chatter, sometimes glimpsedas a small animal darting in the shadows.
He allegedly called himself aquote, extra clever mongoose.
Born in India in 1852.
(33:37):
Jeff would relay gossip about neighbors,torment the family with rude jokes,
and occasionally predict future events.
Paranormal investigators came tostudy the case leaving baffled.
Was Jeff a hoax, a poltergeist,or a very strange mass delusion?
To this day, Jeff remains one of theoldest cases in paranormal history.
(34:00):
Not terrifying, but deeply weird.
And I met oddest, not oldest.
So my take, forget demons and ghosts.
These people got haunted bya standup comic mongoose.
Imagine your Poltergeistisn't slamming doors.
It's roasting your haircut.
Yeah.
Jeff wasn't supernatural.
He was just the world'sfirst heckler ghost.
Angela (34:24):
I'm telling your secrets
John (34:26):
right.
So, which is worst?
A ghost that scares youor one that roasts you?
Yeah, I, I mean, this isa weird freaking story.
I, I don't even know what to say.
Angela (34:37):
Your ghost is making fun of you
John (34:39):
if your ghost is a mongoose,
Angela (34:41):
right?
Sure.
And Jeff,
John (34:43):
so if Jeff really was a mongoose, does that make him
the first Crypted podcaster?
Yes.
I love it.
So need him for the museum.
I agree.
Would you rather live withJeff or move out immediately?
Angela (35:00):
Live with Jeff?
John (35:01):
I probably would live with Jeff too, honestly.
Yeah.
Angela (35:04):
Yeah.
Tell me stories.
John (35:05):
Right.
Okay.
Weird shit.
Number five, modern mystery.
The watcher of Westfield, New Jersey.
Angela (35:16):
The house.
Yes, I know this one.
John (35:19):
A New Jersey family bought their dream home only to receive
terrifying letters from someonecalling themselves the watcher.
Shortly after moving into thehouse in 2014, the broadest family
began receiving anonymous letters.
The writer claimed to be tasked withwatching the home for decades, obsessively
(35:40):
mentioning the children, the house'ssecrets, and a coming second coming.
The tone grew more threatening,and the family became so frightened
they never fully moved in.
Despite extensive police investigationsand even Netflix, dramatizations the
Watcher's, identity remains a mystery.
(36:02):
Some theories point to neighbors,others to real estate grudges, but no
one has ever been caught to this day.
The case stands as one ofsuburbia, strangest, unsolved
stalker mysteries might take.
Buying a house in New Jersey is alreadya horror story at a stalker calling
(36:23):
themselves the watcher, and you'vegot discount Stephen King fanatic.
Forget lawn gnomes.
I'd burn the place to the ground.
So you know this story?
Yeah.
And what are your thoughts?
It's
Angela (36:37):
creepy as shit.
John (36:38):
It's creepy as shit.
Angela (36:40):
And dedication because years.
John (36:43):
Yeah.
So would you still move in ifthe mortgage was dirt cheap?
Nope.
Yeah.
This one, I gotta say thisis he knew where, what
Angela (36:51):
rooms the kids were in.
John (36:53):
This brings up like Major Danny Laplant kind of vibes, right?
Like somebody in the walls,like no, I mean, I don't know
about the paranormal aspect.
This gives me like creepy stalker vibes.
Angela (37:06):
You know what rooms the kids were in?
He kept calling him new blood.
John (37:10):
Nope.
Yuck.
Nope.
So what's scarier?
A stalker who hides outside your houseor one who hides in your mailbox.
Angela (37:19):
Hmm.
Probably the mailbox.
'cause they never see him.
John (37:24):
Yeah.
I mean, yeah.
I don't know this, thisfreaking story creeps me.
No thanks.
Creepy.
Angela (37:30):
Yeah.
John (37:31):
So if you were the watcher, what pity things would
you rate to freak people out?
Angela (37:39):
Tough.
Change your smoke alarm, batteries.
John (37:43):
Yeah, I mean, I think that the dude probably covered the
creepy better than I possibly could.
Mm-hmm.
Because it is creepy.
So,
Angela (37:53):
yeah.
John (37:55):
But with that we have the black screen.
The black screen, which means that'sall I put together for us tonight.
So do you have anything to add?
No.
Alright.
Well that closes out this episode ofDark Dialogue Shadow Chat Sessions,
and we thank you all for joining usand if you like what we do and have how
we do it, please give us a thumbs up.
(38:18):
Hit that bell if you'relistening on YouTube, subscribe.
Even review.
If you're on Spotify or ApplePodcasts, share the show.
All of that helps us more thanyou could possibly imagine.
You can check out all of our moreserious shows and you can find
all of them@darkdialogue.com.
They're available on every placethat you stream your podcast.
(38:39):
You can reach out to us atinfo@darkdialog.com with case
suggestions or funny shit.
Weird shit, strange shit, whatevershit you want us to talk about
or just pictures encrypted.
Send us pictures of Cryptics.
Tell us hello, whatever.
We read everything that you send to us,and that again is info@darkdialog.com.
If you want to support the show,you can find us on Patreon, on
(39:00):
coffee, and you, you can subscribeto our substack@substack.com.
So without anything else to add, no.
Alright, well have a wonderful night.
Angela (39:11):
Stay saved everybody.
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