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Episode Transcript

(00:00):
We have a lot of guestson our show,
and they always have storiesabout meeting you
and fumblingand getting nervous.
I don't knowif you remember,
the first time I met youand the First Lady,
I was doing stand-up comedy at abarbecue for military families.
That was great.We so appreciated it.
Yeah. Thank you.I loved it, as well.
And I was opening upfor the Foo Fighters.
It was Fourth of Julyin the White House.

(00:21):
And I get there.I was so nervous to meet you.
I was Googling how to say helloto the First Lady.
Like, do I say, "Hello,First Lady, Mrs. Obama.
Mrs. Obama, First Lady."
I didn't knowhow to say it.
I think you actually saidall of them.
I think I actually did.
Well, I wore a three-piece suitthat day
because I was very --I just wanted to impress you.
[ Light laughter ]

(00:41):
But it was an outdoor eventon the Fourth of July,
and I remember I got there,
and Dave Grohl was therein board shirts and a T-shirt.
He goes, "You look hot."
I go, "I really am.It's really boiling.
This is crazy."
I go, "Aren't youmeeting the president?"
He goes -- Basically saying,"We're the Foo Fighters.
We dress --"I go, "Yeah."

(01:01):
And then we wait in line,
because we're going to getour picture taken with you guys.
I was so nervousto meet you.
And I went upand I was practicing,
like, "Hello, First Lady,Mrs. First Lady."
And I walk over,
and the First Lady startslaughing and looking at me.
She goes, "Oh, honey,oh, my gosh, you're so sweaty,"
and took my tie --
This is a true story.Loosened my tie.

(01:22):
And I looked at you,
and you had a short-sleevedshirt and khakis on.
I go, "Hello,Mr. President, sir."
And you go,"Didn't you get the memo?
It's a barbecue."
[ Laughter and applause ]
They took the pictureand they escorted me out.
And then I hadn'tseen you since.

(01:44):
[ Laughter ]
I was just wondering,do people get --
do you have any storieslike that,
where people are justso embarrassing like that
and you triedto make them feel better?
Um...nothing that embarrassing.
[ Laughter ]
I think that was actuallythe peak of awkwardness.
Yeah, perfect.Thank you.

(02:06):
Can I just ask youjust straight up,
what is the first thingyou're going to do
when you leave office,do you know?
I'm going to get some sleep,that's for sure.
Yeah. Yeah.
You know, it's actuallya moving thing.
You're talking aboutsentimentality.
But I rememberfrom my inauguration

(02:27):
seeing President Bush --
You get on Marine One,
and that's the last timeyou get on Marine One.
They fly youto Andrews Air Force Base.
And then youget on Air Force One,
and it's your last flight.
And they'll take youanywhere you want.
And I think it's fair to saythat it will be someplace warm.
Because it's going tobe January,

(02:47):
and every inaugurationhas been freezing.
Yeah.
And then, you know,I think Michelle and I
will take a break somewherefor a couple weeks
and, you know, let the girlsmanage for themselves.
[ Laughter ]
Yeah.
Hopefully they'll be okaywhen we get back.

(03:08):
[ Laughter ]
Well, if you needto stay warm,
I have a three-piece suitfor you.