Disability, Roommates & The Disclosure Dilemma

Welcome back to Dude, Where’s My Ramp? The podcast all about disability, mental health, and making the world a bit more accessible (one ramp at a time).

 

In this episode, we dive into a topic many disabled people know well but rarely get to talk about openly: the roommate search, disability disclosure, and navigating shared living when your needs don’t “fit” the norm.

Emma shares her raw, stressful experience trying to fill a spare room while managing grief, life admin, and the reality of being visibly disabled in a competitive housing market.

Chandy reflects on uni accommodation, OCD stigma, messy flat stereotypes, and how people's assumptions deeply shape disabled students’ experiences. Together we explore:

- Why disclosure feels risky

- How internalised ableism shows up in shared living

- Passive-aggressive housemates (and their sticky notes…)

- Sensory needs in shared spaces - Fear of rejection & people pleasing

- The pressure to appear “fine” even when you’re not - The carer dynamic in relationships and why it scares so many disabled people

- Loving friendships vs unwanted caretaking

- What a supportive roommate actually looks like - Why we need more disabled-inclusive housing and community structures This conversation is messy, honest, funny in places, and painfully real in others, exactly the spirit of Dude, Where’s My Ramp? If you’ve ever struggled with roommates, disclosure, or just trying to exist in someone else’s space… this one is for you.

 

Support Resources (UK & US) If anything in this episode brings up difficult emotions, memories, or mental health struggles, please know you’re not alone. Help is available:

🇬🇧 UK Support Samaritans — 24/7 mental health crisis support 📞 116 123 🌐 https://www.samaritans.org

Mind UK — Mental health information & support 🌐 https://www.mind.org.uk

Shout Crisis Text Line — Free, confidential 24/7 text support Text SHOUT to 85258 🌐 https://giveusashout.org

Scope UK — Disability support, advice & advocacy 🌐 https://www.scope.org.uk

🇺🇸 US Support

988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline — 24/7 crisis support 📞 Dial 988 (call or text) 🌐 https://988lifeline.org

NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness) — Education & community support 🌐 https://nami.org

Crisis Text Line — 24/7 text support Text HOME to 741741 🌐 https://www.crisistextline.org

ADAPT / Disability Rights Organizations — Advocacy & community 🌐 https://adapt.org