Stop Calling Disabled People “Inspiring” for Existing

In this episode of Dude, Where’s My Ramp?, Chandy and Emma explore disability, grief, and representation in media, asking where the line sits between pity, inspiration, and genuine understanding.

The conversation begins with a ramp check and a candid catch-up, before moving into a deeply personal reflection from Emma on grief and neurodivergent processing. Emma shares how the film Titanic became an unexpected framework for understanding her mother’s illness and death, using story, metaphor, and creativity as a way to make sense of loss. This section offers a softer, more intimate look at how disabled and neurodivergent people often process emotions differently, and why those approaches deserve respect rather than judgement.

From there, the episode shifts into a wider discussion about “inspiration porn” and “pity porn”, how disabled people are often framed in media to make non-disabled audiences feel inspired, sympathetic, or reassured, rather than represented as full human beings. Chandy and Emma talk about everyday examples, such as being praised for doing ordinary things, and how these reactions are rooted in assumptions about who does and doesn’t belong in public spaces.

The conversation also looks at disability representation in film and television, including Love on the Spectrum, The Undateables, and characters such as Sheldon Cooper in The Big Bang Theory. Together, they unpack how stereotypes are reinforced, how nuance is lost, and why representation matters not just for disabled audiences, but for what non-disabled audiences take away.

Throughout the episode, Chandy and Emma reflect on pride, identity, and the complexity of disabled life, acknowledging that disability can be painful and difficult without framing it as a personal tragedy. The episode closes with a reminder that disabled lives contain joy, creativity, humour, and meaning, even when those experiences don’t fit comfortable narratives.

Content note: This episode includes discussion of grief, disability, mental health, ableism, and strong language.

Show notes Topics discussed include disability representation, inspiration porn and pity narratives, grief and neurodivergence, media stereotypes, Love on the Spectrum, The Undateables, The Big Bang Theory, and lived experience of disability.

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