Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
Oh, how me?
Fancy seeing you here, Giamatti.
How are you? How is my Amy's?
I stood and gave her a hug.
Toumani was ahead in mere acting school.
Originally from Detroit,she was a biracial beauty
with brains, talentand plenty of that girl.
You know, I brought the house downwherever the hell Iowa.
Germany was one of the bestsingers I'd ever heard.
(00:23):
Her voice was full of heart and soul.
She looked down at my audition folderthat was open and resting on the table.
And what are you auditioning with today,Miss Thing?
I can't decide.
I'm not even sure I'll get seen anyway.
Being nonunion. You never know.
Things are moving quick.
They get nuts in and out.
Hang in there. Okay.
Oh, listen,I've got to run, but let's catch up.
(00:46):
I looked back down at my audition folder.
I really didn't knowwhat I was going to sing.
Truth was,I couldn't stop thinking about Liam.
I had been listening to Ricky Martin.
She bangs on repeatever since our chance encounter.
And now I couldn't get it out of my head.
And that wasn't an appropriate song choicefor Fiddler on the Roof.
Mind you, I didn't think Hollywas an appropriate choice
(01:06):
of casting for that show.
But nevertheless, it's good to get seen.
I had almost been cast on Broadwaylast year.
A show I'd worked on inLondon was set to open here,
and they needed an immediate replacement
for a swing who had broken her armduring a trial show run in Canada.
The producers had called meand arranged for me to audition.
The day of my firstbig audition was hectic.
(01:27):
I had also had my last examplay of the semester that day.
In the morning
I was a Victorian prostitute being shippedoff for her crimes to the colonies.
And after lunch
I was splashing out on a taxi to make sureI'd made it to the audition on time.
Normally, I didn't have the spare cashto splash out on me,
but made an exception on this occasion,given its gravity.
When I arrived at the audition,I had no idea what the process
(01:51):
was going to be.
I was a rookiewho was nervous as hell, but
I knew I wanted to enjoy and savorevery moment.
I had to calm myself down in the elevator,and once the doors opened,
I was greeted by the head of casting
for one of the most prominentcasting offices in the industry.
I show him a tortoiseshell glassesextended his hand.
Hi, I'm Chris.
(02:12):
You must be Miss Hudson. Hi.
I am. It's so lovely to meet you.
Thank you for seeing me. I was so nervous.
I assume I sounded more like a turkey,but they gave me good news.
You're so welcome.I've heard great things.
Follow me so we can dump you stuffand get you some water.
I was being treated like a Tony Awardwinning actress.
The UK production team had sung my praisesso much that I somehow
(02:35):
bypassed the nitty gritty auditionprotocol, and I was instantly ushered
into the back room.
They thought I was a star.
I was handed a bottle of waterand made comfortable before going in
to sing for the team.
10 minutes later,
I was in that room singing my tits off,belting out some old school classics.
I performed like a diva, darling.
(02:56):
I gave them a real showand I made the room laugh.
I do a great drunk Australian, Sheila,and I couldn't get it off.
I wondered if this really was it.
As I left the casting, I knew I hadn'tlet those who recommended me down.
I floated on air all the way to the nittygritty Essex train to go home.
(03:16):
I wondered if it was going to bethat easy.
One auditionand bam, straight to Broadway.
I mean, it was that simple in the movies.
Oh, it was the best day of my life.
Second to the day I moved here.
I really was living the dream that day.
That's how life goes, right?
Things are a bit shit.
And then all your dreams come true.
(03:37):
Apparently not.
It wasn't quite a rejection,but it was bad news.
Turns out they wanted me for the role.
Unluckily,my student visa did not allow for me
to join the unionor authorize me to work on Broadway.
So no matter how hard the producers tried,
there was no way for me to get a workvisa quick enough to be in that show.
I needed a green card.
(03:59):
Turns out marrying Hannah's house of Keithwould have been better for my career.
My dreams were crushed, and that was thefirst time I felt let down by New York.
One minute it felt like I was ridingthis insanely fantastic roller coaster,
and next it felt like I was missing outmy fried Oreos as we banked a corner
or worse, I'd slipped out of the safetyrestraints and crashed to earth below.
(04:21):
My heart broke a little that day.
But I told myself that my time will comeand I will never give up trying.
Just have to keep showing up to the opencalls in hopes of being remembered.
Fiddler on the Roof, starring the fabulousHolly Hudson, is
What if Tevye has five daughters?
Unfortunately,we aren't seeing any nonunion today.
(04:42):
If you wish to leave your headshotand resume for casting, you may do so.
I packed my folder into my bag,which was full of
so much unnecessary crapand had it outside.
It was really fucking cold.
During the winter, the city is freezing.
Apparently, it's not that bad
if you're from Chicagoand you used your eyelashes snapping off.
(05:03):
But if you are from the jolly old UK, thenit's undoubtedly freesia tits off cold.
I hugged my new cream coatcloser to my body.
I felt grateful to have a coat
that was a timewhen I didn't have a proper coat
during my first two years of being here.
I only had a sort of outerlayer component.
Q Marlene Moss, Business acting School.
(05:24):
I befriended the security guardwho sat behind the desk every morning.
Her name was Marlene, and she was a fiercewoman who was ahead of her time.
Marlene was African-Americanand originally from Georgia.
She was in her fifties, poised as hell,had a shaved head and carried a gun.
It wasn'tthese things that made her a trailblazer.
It was her contentmentwith being the ultimate bachelorette.
(05:47):
She was beautiful, elegant, andmost importantly, had the kindest heart.
But she didn't need no man.
No, sir.
No man was going to dictatehow she lived her life.
When I was too broke to eat,
Marlene greeted me at I had made muffinswhen I needed cheering up.
Marlene took me to Alice's teacup.
If I showed up to school crying,Marlene wipes my tears.
(06:09):
And when I had no coat to stay warm.
Marlene took me shoppingand bought me one.
Ooh. How about this one, Holly?
I couldn't afford a coat from here.Marlene.
Socks is too fancy.
Well, why don't you just try it onand see if it fits?
I tried on the coat.
Oh. Huh?
It's amazing.
(06:30):
It's really flattering.Cream is your color.
How you look beautiful.
I'm going to get it for you, Marlene.
Don't be silly.
I can accept. Hardly.
I won't hear another word. Say thank you.
Thank you, Marlene.
You're welcome.
Besides, you'll take me to Harrodsone day when your big break is here
(06:53):
and it's coming. Howie.
I can feel it.
It's going to happen for you.
Marlene believed in melike I really believed
she was the mother I'd always wanted.
And one of my best friends,an Earth angel.
Sadly, I would never get to take Marleneto London.
She died suddenly a few weeksafter our trip to Saks.
(07:15):
But it always felt like she was herelooking out for me, thanks to this coat.
Seems like yonks ago now,when I had no case and a job that involved
standing on the street of Fifth Avenuebetween 36 and 37th Street.
Staley workingfive in the morning to nine,
it was all taking a no givingcome rain or snow, handing out fliers
for one of those generic sandwich shopto see intermittently about the city.
(07:37):
I had so much determinationto make it as an actress,
I was willing to stand outsidedoing a mile January New York winter.
You know the kind where the temperatureis usually only minus ten degrees.
It honestly felt like I was working insidea snow globe for the most part.
I'm surprised to this daythat I still have nipples left.
There were times it was so coldI feared that they may just break off
(07:58):
as I continuedtowards the subway to go home.
I got the hankering for a cup of tea.
Okay, fine.
I wanted to see if Liam was working.
After all, the orange coffee shopwas only a few blocks away,
and I suppose it wasn't the coldest daythat the city had ever seen.
So my mammary glands were safe.
Besides, I looked pretty cute in my coatand my new tote
bubble hat that I'd recently purchasedfrom a street vendor for seven. But.
(08:21):
Oh, fuck it.
I headed in the opposite directionto Wall City and the boy.
Oops, sorry,
I said as I tripped over the feetof someone sleeping on the street.
God, I felt like such a bitchfor not noticing them down there.
I reached into my bagand fished out some coins.
I put them in the cupnext to the homeless person.
I couldn't tell
if the feet belong to a woman or a man,or if they were dead or alive.
(08:45):
That whole fuck your coins, lady.
Oh, they were.
He and he was very much alive.
Before I ended orange,I checked my reflection in the window.
I couldn't help but feel excited.
Sure enough, as soon as I stepped inside,I saw Liam leaning on the counter,
his perky little bat very muchpronounced by his tight Navy chinos.
(09:07):
And he. He was talking to a woman.
Not just any woman.
He was talking to Alice.
Fucking Alice.
Alice had also been in our acting class.
She was a terrible actress,but had the perfect look for television.
She had long brown hairand Bambi like his own,
and she weighed less than the bagI was carrying on my shoulder.
(09:29):
I wanted to turn around and leave.
I needed to escape as much as the chickensand the movie chicken run.
As I started to turn backtowards the door, Liam saw me.
Holly.
I slowly turned back.
Liam.
I thought I might find you here.
Well, that was weird.
But too late now.
Yes. A painful lesson meansone can protect their voice and enunciate
(09:51):
all their consonants, ensuringthat intended audience is his every word.
He definitely had me. Come join us.
You remember Alice, don't you?
Liam gestured towards Alice. Chris.
She looked like a supermodel.
Yes, of course.
Hi, Alice.
Oh, lovely to see you again.
I hugged her.
(10:11):
It was like hugging Holly.
So nice surprises to see you.
She spoke with this very intenseBulgarian accent,
the kindthat makes your eyebrows knit together
because you have to concentrateso hard to understand it.
Holly, do you want some tea?
Yes, please.
I smiled at him. And then fake smile.
(10:33):
Just Alice. Fucking Alice.
What have you been up to, Alice?
Life treating you well?
God, she was beautiful.
I felt like a Teletubbystanding next to her.
Yes, I just did a Cadillac commercialin my bikini.
Not sure why she felt the need to tell methat.
It paid really good. Really good.
Few thousands.
(10:54):
Or that.
Oh, that's jolly good, isn't it?
I was still fake, smiling and beginningto flare my nostrils like a troll.
Liam returned with my teaand a small plate.
I got you another cookie.
I know how you love cookies and sugar.Liam chuckled.
He looked at Alice.
You also was laughing a little too loudly.
Like she never eat a cookie.
(11:19):
I'm actually not that hungry.
Maybe I'll take it home for my roommate.
I was obviously lying.
I was going to inhale it later.
The next half hour, I sipped my teaand smiled whilst I listened to Liam.
Analysis stories, tale after tale
describing their backpacking adventuresin the Andes.
(11:39):
Of course, they also went to Machu Picchuand loved it.
Everyone does.
They were very much in loveand clearly she band very well.
I wanted to die being British.
I was too polite to leave right away,so I had to sit and endure the torture.
The day really couldn't have gotten worse,even though the weather was frigid.
(12:00):
Before heading home, I decided to goon a stroll to the Empire State Building.
Seeing it alllit up, always cheered me up.
Some nights I have this recurring dreamof being in a jeep,
driving along Fifth Avenue in my dream.
When I reached the Empire State Building,I stand up on the seat and whistle.
Then a giant pink
(12:21):
number appears from behind it,with a big smile on its face.
Is very happy to see me.
I have no idea what this dream means.
As the sun hadn't begun to quite set,the lights were yet to be turned on.
Oh, today just wasn't my day.
I waited at the crosswalk oppositemy favorite iconic building,
even unless it was still glorious.
(12:44):
I looked up, shielding my eyes from thelate Sun's luminosity and drank it all in.
All of the movies that I had seenthis emblem in flashed
before me, causing me to feel excitement.
Enjoy that.
I lived so close to it.
I splendid.
I started to cross the streetand when I was about halfway across,
(13:05):
I felt a
splatter of somethinglukewarm and substantial on my face.
I knew it wasn't pigeon shit from the wayit sprayed me.
The sound of cracking to the right of meconfirmed my thought there.
Approximately three feet away from mewere the remains of somebodies body.
Someone who had fallen out of lovewith New York.
(13:26):
Someone who had chosen to fallfrom one of the world's most famous
architectural accomplishments.
As opposed to just stare upand marvelous is someone whose last choice
had just ruined the cream coatMarlene had so lovingly
gifted me.
Next time on a few
(13:47):
NYC singing waitresses,broken noses and Rasputin.
Do you know I love British people?
They are my favorite
F-you NYC and IDC production starringEmily Eden,
written and created by Emily Eden SoundDesign and Engineering by Lewis Fisher.
Executive Producer Marci Gilbert.
Co-created, Producedand directed by Eric Wickstrom.
(14:10):
Guest starring Mike Trick.
Mario three. Gordon Lewis Fisher.
Jamie LAMB. Chick.