April 22, 2024 • 27 mins
In this captivating episode titled "Walk by Faith and not by Sight,"(2Corinthians 5:7), witness my transformative journey of Faith as I navigate through trials and tribulations of life. Born into a religious family, I will discover an evolved understanding of faith as I tread through hardships and life-changing events.
I will recount early experiences with spirituality including baptism at a young age and the awakening of my spirituality during college, signified by a deep bonding with worship that escalates my connection with the Holy Spirit.
The episode delves deep into my relationship with the Holy Spirit, a guiding force for strength and a divine gift of love from God. The podcast also uncovers a disheartening event, when the bond with my father underwent a dramatic shift, invoking a whirlwind of emotions and loss. It was during these moments of utter despair, that my bond with God provided the ultimate refuge.
The concluding segment draws a metaphorical inference about life being the "line of faith," leading to God amid world turmoil. Steering through life's undulations, while maintaining a steadfast faith, brings about tranquility and reinforces belief in God's divine plan. The episode serves as a beacon of resilience, instilling the tenacity of faith in God during adversities.
The narrative echoes powerfully about the decision to conceive a third child, laden with emotional turmoil and physical challenges, and shows how faith in God helped me to navigate this journey. If you're grappling with hopelessness or feeling isolated, this episode offers a high-spirited reminder that God's love has the capability to fill your void.
Anticipation for the upcoming episode portrays a gripping theme around dark secrets and the burden of judgment. Be ready to immerse in these intricate life occurrences and seek grace and healing.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
For we walk by faith and not by sight.
2 Corinthians 5-7 When I was born, my dad looked down at the sweet baby girl
in his hands and said, She's going to grow up to be a little Christian,
so we will name her Christian.
I've spent my entire life embracing the name and trying to embody what I thought
(00:24):
it stood for. I was baptized around the age of seven and have had a relationship
with Jesus as far back as I can remember.
I was saved, I believed, I attended church, and I was pretty sure I had a good
idea of what it meant to be a Christian.
It wasn't until I started growing up and went off to college that I realized
(00:46):
there was a lot more to it. I could have a much deeper connection with God than
the current surface-level relationship of the present.
I began going to a church where they lifted their hands to the Lord during worship.
At first, it felt quite awkward and uncomfortable. But eventually,
I found myself looking forward to it each week.
(01:09):
I've always loved music. As a matter of fact, I was a music minor in college.
So when the world of modern Christian music was opened up to me,
my soul began to open up to Jesus.
I was growing in my faith and becoming acquainted with the Holy Spirit.
After college, it took a while to find my way back into church.
(01:32):
My husband joined the military, we had a baby, and we did three military moves in about three years.
The Spirit was calling to me, though. Eventually in Texas, we decided it was
time to find a church home.
We were so blessed to find an amazing place, which would end up being the first
(01:53):
church I ever truly felt was a church home.
It was here that I began to seek and learn more about the Holy Spirit.
I knew I felt it.
There was an eagerness to understand it better. I never heard much about the
Spirit when I was younger.
Occasionally, someone would say a prayer with the phrase, Three in one,
(02:17):
God, the Son, and the Holy Ghost.
And that was about as far as it went. The desire to get acquainted with the
Spirit led me to my Bible.
In Romans 5-5, we see, And hope does not put us to shame, because God's love
has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who's been given to us.
(02:39):
The Holy Spirit is a gift of love sent from the Lord.
Most of my life, I've thought of it as my conscience.
It guides me on what's right or wrong and helps me discover my own convictions.
But in reality, the Spirit is so much more than that.
(02:59):
In Acts 1-8, we read, But you will receive power when the Holy Spirit comes
on you and in all Judea and Samaria and to the ends of the earth.
Have you ever had a season of life where you felt as if it was just too difficult?
How were you going to make it through this? Maybe you felt like you had nothing
(03:21):
left to give and you just wanted to give up. There was no fight left.
And yet, somehow, you kept going.
Somehow, you pushed through. There was a force inside of you that carried you
in your time of weakness.
Even when you thought you couldn't make it, your strength was more than you imagined.
(03:46):
You had endurance beyond your own understanding.
Despite crying all of those tears, falling to your knees and wanting nothing more than to surrender?
You survived.
Perhaps you felt so alone through that season.
Can you believe that it was the Spirit holding you up as your flesh was falling down?
(04:10):
Could it be that God's love was inside of you, giving you the strength,
the power to overcome, the power that can only come from the Lord.
Is it true that you were not really ever alone?
Because inside of you was a gift, the gift of the Holy Ghost.
(04:32):
Inside of you was hope. The Holy Spirit provided that hope, and because of it,
you stand where you are today.
Or maybe you became who you are today. day.
Romans 15, 13. May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace and believing
(04:56):
so that by the power of the Holy Spirit,
you may abound in hope.
When do we need hope?
Do we need it when we feel content?
No. Hope is needed when our hearts are heavy and our minds are consumed with
worry. when there seems to be no way forward or the desires of our hearts seem impossible.
(05:22):
That's when we need hope. I'd like to share with you a time when I desperately needed this hope.
About five and a half years ago, a terrible event occurred where I lost my dad's
presence in my daily life.
By no fault of my own, my entire life and the future I thought we'd have together
(05:45):
just disappeared in an instant.
My dad didn't pass away, but there was a drastic incident that would change our lives forever.
When this event happened, I felt completely lost.
I had so many different emotions and no idea which way to go,
which emotion should lead.
(06:07):
I'm a planner. I like like to know what's going to happen, or at the very least,
have a plan to figure things out.
In this instance, I had absolutely no control.
There was nothing I could do to change the outcome of these circumstances.
I was powerless. This lack of control was extremely hard for me to deal with.
(06:33):
It brought on so much anxiety.
After the initial shock wore off, I turned to the only thing that still made
sense to me, the Word of God.
The first verse that really stood out to me was Philippians 4-7,
And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts
(06:57):
and your minds in Christ Jesus.
I so needed peace, and I definitely needed something to transcend understanding
because at the time, I didn't have any.
Through prayer and worship, I began to realize that I truly could cast my worries
up to the Lord. I could have peace.
(07:20):
I thought I had faith before, but I was about to experience true faith,
a faith in which I surrendered all to God and trusted in Him completely.
I had no control, but through it all, God was in control.
There was a new understanding that realized God was not only my God, He's God to all.
(07:46):
He's looking out for each one of us, and every one has their own path.
I trusted that God knew what was best for everyone involved,
and however it was going to turn out, it was what needed to happen.
God knows what He's doing, and He knows what needs to be done.
(08:09):
Even if the season was going to be difficult and not what I'd hoped for in life,
it wasn't about out just me.
There were more people involved.
There was a bigger picture, and we each had our own destinies.
It isn't easy to realize that someone you love so much would be going on their
(08:31):
own journey, a journey that God needed to work through.
But this was faith. Having complete peace in a situation where I had no control was faith.
Releasing all my doubts, fears, and what I wished would happen to realize that
(08:52):
what needed to happen was happening was faith.
This faith came from a place deep within my heart.
It was a calmness I had never felt before. A veil had lifted from my eyes,
and now I could see everything.
John 14 1 tells us, Do not let your hearts be troubled.
(09:16):
You believe in God. Believe also in me.
In these tough times, when we feel so lost, we need to remember who God is.
We need to remember and understand what it means to believe.
(09:36):
It's one thing to learn all the stories, to know all the miracles,
to say, I am a Christian, but it's another to live life as if we truly believe these things.
Our Father God is the miracle maker, the deliverer, our savior.
If you believe in him, have faith.
(10:01):
Learn to trust that in any situation, he is in control.
It may seem like he's letting you down, but the thing is, God sees that whole picture.
He sees everyone involved, not just you.
God fits the pieces of the puzzle together other and creates a masterpiece.
(10:24):
We just have to have faith.
I don't know why, but I found looking at life as a line has helped me. Let me explain.
There's a line connecting where you are now to where God is taking you.
As you go through life, you walk this line. I like to call it the line of faith.
(10:47):
All around you is chaos. Other lines going high, going low, what you might call
the ups and downs of life. It's easy to think we are walking these lines with
all the craziness life brings.
And sometimes, maybe we do.
Perhaps we go off the line of
faith from time to time. But we can get back on it. We can find it again.
(11:12):
All around us can be that chaos, these ways of the world. But on that line of faith is peace.
If we can walk that straight line, we can make it through anything,
and we can do it without all the worry.
This line of faith still walks through the ups and downs.
(11:34):
We still experience the same things, but the difference is our faith is unwavering.
There's a destination, nation, something amazing God has for us if we just continue walking.
Have you ever heard the story of Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego?
(11:56):
In Daniel chapter 3 verses 24 to 25, we see.
Then Nebuchadnezzar the king was astonished, and rose up in haste and spake,
and said unto his counselors, did not we cast three men bound into the midst of the fire?
They answered and said unto the king, true, O king.
(12:18):
He answered and said, lo, I see
four men loose walking in the midst of the fire, and they have no hurt.
And the form of the fourth is like the son of God.
This is what I'm talking about. Walking by faith is like being thrown in the fire, but not burning.
(12:42):
When you walk by faith, the devil and the ways of the world won't deter you
because your entire trust is in the Lord.
You aren't alone. God's with you and he will walk by your side.
When we go through trials, we often feel like God's so far away.
We keep walking and walking and in the wrong direction.
(13:05):
Then we wonder, where is he? Where is God in this? He feels so far away.
But if only you would turn around.
He's there. He's been there the whole time. You've just been walking the wrong way.
Or you weren't walking at all. You were stuck in that place of I give up.
(13:29):
God is waiting for you. He's ready to embrace you and show you the way back to that path of faith.
True faith is believing when you can't see the end.
You might not even see what's around you in the present.
Fog surrounds you. The haze won't allow you to pass.
But faith will guide your way. As it did Moses through the Red Sea.
(13:55):
If the water is too deep, God can help you walk on water, as Peter did, so you won't drown.
Trust may not be easy for you. I know it isn't for me.
But if we are Christians, it is what God has called us to do.
We must trust, have faith, and believe in Him.
(14:19):
I think my favorite line from the movie The Santa Claus illustrates it well.
Seeing isn't believing.
Believing is seeing. When you believe in him, you are more likely to recognize
his works, his miracles, and his presence.
Sometimes you have to believe before you can receive deliverance from your circumstances.
(14:43):
Clear your mind, lift your worries, and have true faith in the one who loves
you so much he sent his only son to die for you.
Have faith in the one who knows the number of hairs on your head and every thought you've ever had.
Have faith in the one who molded you in your mother's womb and in he who loves
(15:08):
you more than any earthly human could.
Don't give up because God is for you.
We need to have faith during hard times like these, But we also need to have
faith when God is speaking to our hearts.
Is there something you feel like you want to do or you're supposed to do,
(15:31):
but you're afraid to do it?
Are you holding back because you don't know what will happen?
What if you fail? What if you can't do it?
Maybe it's something that seems so far outside your comfort zone,
you don't even understand why you have this conviction.
God can sometimes surprise us, like he did me with starting this podcast. cast.
(15:55):
Every time I put myself out there, I'm scared.
What if this is all for nothing? What if I'm wrong? What if I'm not supposed to do this?
What if people don't like me?
When these questions enter my mind, I remember that the devil is the father of lies.
(16:17):
Every time we doubt God and what he's telling us, it's because we're listening to lies.
It isn't that we might not fail, because we might.
But it's that we forget, even if we do, it isn't the end. We don't have to stop there.
Let's adapt. Let's change. Don't give up.
(16:39):
If God has placed something on your heart, don't stand in your own way.
There could be something phenomenal waiting for you. give it a try.
Believe in yourself because our God is an awesome God and anything is possible.
He knows us better than we know ourselves and he blesses us with gifts we're meant to share.
(17:05):
Have faith and believe in what the Spirit is telling you.
When those doubts enter my mind, The Spirit tells me, how can you fail when
God is calling you to do this?
Remember Romans 8.28?
And we know that for those who love God, all things work together for good.
(17:27):
For those who are called according to His purpose.
God has a purpose for you. Your calling, your conviction, and the pull on your
heart is part of a purpose that will bring about good things.
Something good is going to come from you following God's voice.
(17:50):
It may be something completely different than what we think it'll be,
but what if it changes someone's life for the better?
What if it changes your life for the better?
What if your calling changes the world?
The Holy Spirit gives us power, and that power can do incredible things.
(18:14):
In fact, it's because of God's voice that my son exists today.
You see, my first birth was very scary.
I was in labor for more than 25 hours after my water broke.
My body just would not progress enough, so a C-section it was.
A feeling of pain overwhelmed me.
(18:37):
In the moment, I thought I was about to die. I pictured my husband smiling when
he held our baby girl for the first time, and that brought me peace.
If I was going to die, I knew he loved her. My mind then began to go in and out of reality.
Later, I would come to and find out that I had hemorrhaged and needed a transfusion.
(19:02):
We were able to go home with our baby girl a few days later,
And for a couple of years, we just soaked her up.
After a while, though, I knew I wanted at least one more baby so my daughter could have a sibling.
I love my siblings so much, and I wanted her to experience that kind of love, too.
(19:22):
In 2015, I'd end up being in labor with baby girl number two the day of my scheduled C-section.
This time, the surgery went well. But after, the doctor explained that my uterine
walls were very thin, and if I had done a VBAC, there would have been a pretty
high chance either the baby or I wouldn't have survived.
(19:45):
So once my second daughter grew out of her crib, we sold all her baby things. We were done.
Then when I hit 30, I thought, well, we're really done now, because I don't want kids after 30.
My mom had a lot of trouble with my brother. mother.
All my life, I had wanted three kids, two girls and a boy, just like my mom and my grandmother.
(20:09):
I thought it was too dangerous, so I tried to give up on this dream.
It seems like God had other plans, though.
Back in 2020, I went on a walk in Ohio, where we were living at the time.
I was listening to worship music through my headphones.
The sky was so clear despite the a slight chill in the air.
(20:30):
The sun's warmth kissed my rosy cheeks, and I soaked up the joy that radiated
down from the atmosphere.
There I was, all alone on a well-hidden track behind some tall trees.
All of a sudden, I heard a voice. The voice said, Why won't you have another baby?
(20:53):
I answered, I don't know. Oh, yes, you do, claimed the voice.
I reluctantly responded, fear.
The voice said, What does my word say about fear?
I went home, opened my Bible, and I kid you not, The first verse I saw was Joshua 1.9.
(21:16):
Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous.
Do not be afraid. Do not be discouraged.
For the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.
I immediately was like, okay, I hear you, God.
Seven months later, we found out we were pregnant with baby number three, our boy.
(21:41):
Turns out, though, his birth would be the scariest of all.
My water broke an hour before we were to leave for the hospital.
We arrived, baby was born and healthy. It seemed like things were going great.
Soon after he was born, my spinal stopped working.
I felt almost unbearable pain as they finished stitching me up.
(22:05):
You know those torture tables from the medieval times? that's what I felt like was happening to me.
Eventually, I made it through and into our room.
Soon after that, I began to feel nauseous. Turns out, I was hemorrhaging and clotting.
I have two different blood issues that perplex doctors with how to treat me.
(22:28):
The next thing I knew, the machine was beeping. They were laying me flat. I was about to pass out.
They were running me as quickly as they could, back through the halls,
back to an OR, trying to save my life.
At first, I was terrified.
But then I reminded myself that God told me to have this baby.
(22:49):
Even if I didn't make it, my son must have a great destiny.
He was spoken into existence by the Lord.
This brought me peace, and my fear disappeared. I was put under general anesthesia,
not knowing if I'd wake up again.
Praise God, I would wake up. In the middle of a transfusion,
(23:12):
but feeling much better than I had before.
I say all this to reiterate faith. I trusted God when he spoke to me.
And even when I thought I might die, I trusted that God's plan had purpose.
My faith got me through and blessed us with the gift of our son.
Following God can be scary. Even the disciples had risks in choosing to follow Jesus.
(23:38):
They were beaten, imprisoned, and even killed.
Having faith and doing what we're called to do isn't always the easy thing.
A lot of the time, it can be terrifying, uncomfortable, and challenging to stand
up and do what has been placed on our hearts.
Although sometimes hard, it can also be rewarding.
(24:01):
The gift of my son brings me an unexplainable joy. He fills a hole I didn't even know existed.
God wants to fill the holes in your heart too. What are you waiting for?
Do you need reassurance or perhaps you're waiting for a sign?
If so, this is it. This message is for you.
(24:25):
Go out and share your gifts with the world. Follow the pool on your heart and take that leap of faith.
Do you truly believe Jesus is our Savior?
Do you believe that God is the God of miracles?
If you do, listen to the Holy Spirit. it.
Find your courage within and have faith that God will be with you every step of the way.
(24:51):
Maybe this isn't your season of following your heart.
You might need to have faith through a season of despair. You feel like all hope is lost.
You feel alone. You feel like you don't matter.
The devil tells you, you're a failure.
You're worthless. You'll never make it. No one cares. Just give up.
(25:12):
If this is you, I need you to hear me.
Don't listen to those lies.
God loves you. You are never alone.
Today may not be a happy day. Tomorrow may not be either. Just keep walking.
(25:35):
Find that path of faith. One day, I promise you, something will change.
One day you'll have a glimpse of happiness again.
That glimpse will grow and you can leave the grief, pain, and desperation behind you.
Whether other people want to admit it or not, many of them have felt some of these same feelings.
(25:58):
Other people are going through what you are going through.
Other people feel shame, regret, loneliness, fear, isolation.
But there's hope. There is love out there for you.
Know that I've been there and I'm now on the other side. I can see things clearly
(26:20):
and there's freedom to be had.
Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding.
In all your ways, acknowledge him and he will direct your path.
Proverbs 3, 5, and 6. I know the world can be a cruel and unforgiving place.
(26:42):
Judgment can be a heavy weight to carry.
But faith, faith can set us free. I hope you enjoyed episode 2.
Next time on Graceful Messes and Hopeful Guesses, Deep Dark Secrets and Judgment.
Got a secret? Will you keep it? Look forward to discussing more on episode 3.
(27:07):
Can't wait to see you there.
For we walk by faith and not by sight.
2 Corinthians 5-7 When I was born, my dad looked down at the sweet baby girl
in his hands and said, She's going to grow up to be a little Christian,
so we will name her Christian.
I've spent my entire life embracing the name and trying to embody what I thought
(00:24):
it stood for. I was baptized around the age of seven and have had a relationship
with Jesus as far back as I can remember.
I was saved, I believed, I attended church, and I was pretty sure I had a good
idea of what it meant to be a Christian.
It wasn't until I started growing up and went off to college that I realized
(00:46):
there was a lot more to it. I could have a much deeper connection with God than
the current surface-level relationship of the present.
I began going to a church where they lifted their hands to the Lord during worship.
At first, it felt quite awkward and uncomfortable. But eventually,
I found myself looking forward to it each week.
(01:09):
I've always loved music. As a matter of fact, I was a music minor in college.
So when the world of modern Christian music was opened up to me,
my soul began to open up to Jesus.
I was growing in my faith and becoming acquainted with the Holy Spirit.
After college, it took a while to find my way back into church.
(01:32):
My husband joined the military, we had a baby, and we did three military moves in about three years.
The Spirit was calling to me, though. Eventually in Texas, we decided it was
time to find a church home.
We were so blessed to find an amazing place, which would end up being the first
(01:53):
church I ever truly felt was a church home.
It was here that I began to seek and learn more about the Holy Spirit.
I knew I felt it.
There was an eagerness to understand it better. I never heard much about the
Spirit when I was younger.
Occasionally, someone would say a prayer with the phrase, Three in one,
(02:17):
God, the Son, and the Holy Ghost.
And that was about as far as it went. The desire to get acquainted with the
Spirit led me to my Bible.
In Romans 5-5, we see, And hope does not put us to shame, because God's love
has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who's been given to us.
(02:39):
The Holy Spirit is a gift of love sent from the Lord.
Most of my life, I've thought of it as my conscience.
It guides me on what's right or wrong and helps me discover my own convictions.
But in reality, the Spirit is so much more than that.
(02:59):
In Acts 1-8, we read, But you will receive power when the Holy Spirit comes
on you and in all Judea and Samaria and to the ends of the earth.
Have you ever had a season of life where you felt as if it was just too difficult?
How were you going to make it through this? Maybe you felt like you had nothing
(03:21):
left to give and you just wanted to give up. There was no fight left.
And yet, somehow, you kept going.
Somehow, you pushed through. There was a force inside of you that carried you
in your time of weakness.
Even when you thought you couldn't make it, your strength was more than you imagined.
(03:46):
You had endurance beyond your own understanding.
Despite crying all of those tears, falling to your knees and wanting nothing more than to surrender?
You survived.
Perhaps you felt so alone through that season.
Can you believe that it was the Spirit holding you up as your flesh was falling down?
(04:10):
Could it be that God's love was inside of you, giving you the strength,
the power to overcome, the power that can only come from the Lord.
Is it true that you were not really ever alone?
Because inside of you was a gift, the gift of the Holy Ghost.
(04:32):
Inside of you was hope. The Holy Spirit provided that hope, and because of it,
you stand where you are today.
Or maybe you became who you are today. day.
Romans 15, 13. May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace and believing
(04:56):
so that by the power of the Holy Spirit,
you may abound in hope.
When do we need hope?
Do we need it when we feel content?
No. Hope is needed when our hearts are heavy and our minds are consumed with
worry. when there seems to be no way forward or the desires of our hearts seem impossible.
(05:22):
That's when we need hope. I'd like to share with you a time when I desperately needed this hope.
About five and a half years ago, a terrible event occurred where I lost my dad's
presence in my daily life.
By no fault of my own, my entire life and the future I thought we'd have together
(05:45):
just disappeared in an instant.
My dad didn't pass away, but there was a drastic incident that would change our lives forever.
When this event happened, I felt completely lost.
I had so many different emotions and no idea which way to go,
which emotion should lead.
(06:07):
I'm a planner. I like like to know what's going to happen, or at the very least,
have a plan to figure things out.
In this instance, I had absolutely no control.
There was nothing I could do to change the outcome of these circumstances.
I was powerless. This lack of control was extremely hard for me to deal with.
(06:33):
It brought on so much anxiety.
After the initial shock wore off, I turned to the only thing that still made
sense to me, the Word of God.
The first verse that really stood out to me was Philippians 4-7,
And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts
(06:57):
and your minds in Christ Jesus.
I so needed peace, and I definitely needed something to transcend understanding
because at the time, I didn't have any.
Through prayer and worship, I began to realize that I truly could cast my worries
up to the Lord. I could have peace.
(07:20):
I thought I had faith before, but I was about to experience true faith,
a faith in which I surrendered all to God and trusted in Him completely.
I had no control, but through it all, God was in control.
There was a new understanding that realized God was not only my God, He's God to all.
(07:46):
He's looking out for each one of us, and every one has their own path.
I trusted that God knew what was best for everyone involved,
and however it was going to turn out, it was what needed to happen.
God knows what He's doing, and He knows what needs to be done.
(08:09):
Even if the season was going to be difficult and not what I'd hoped for in life,
it wasn't about out just me.
There were more people involved.
There was a bigger picture, and we each had our own destinies.
It isn't easy to realize that someone you love so much would be going on their
(08:31):
own journey, a journey that God needed to work through.
But this was faith. Having complete peace in a situation where I had no control was faith.
Releasing all my doubts, fears, and what I wished would happen to realize that
(08:52):
what needed to happen was happening was faith.
This faith came from a place deep within my heart.
It was a calmness I had never felt before. A veil had lifted from my eyes,
and now I could see everything.
John 14 1 tells us, Do not let your hearts be troubled.
(09:16):
You believe in God. Believe also in me.
In these tough times, when we feel so lost, we need to remember who God is.
We need to remember and understand what it means to believe.
(09:36):
It's one thing to learn all the stories, to know all the miracles,
to say, I am a Christian, but it's another to live life as if we truly believe these things.
Our Father God is the miracle maker, the deliverer, our savior.
If you believe in him, have faith.
(10:01):
Learn to trust that in any situation, he is in control.
It may seem like he's letting you down, but the thing is, God sees that whole picture.
He sees everyone involved, not just you.
God fits the pieces of the puzzle together other and creates a masterpiece.
(10:24):
We just have to have faith.
I don't know why, but I found looking at life as a line has helped me. Let me explain.
There's a line connecting where you are now to where God is taking you.
As you go through life, you walk this line. I like to call it the line of faith.
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All around you is chaos. Other lines going high, going low, what you might call
the ups and downs of life. It's easy to think we are walking these lines with
all the craziness life brings.
And sometimes, maybe we do.
Perhaps we go off the line of
faith from time to time. But we can get back on it. We can find it again.
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All around us can be that chaos, these ways of the world. But on that line of faith is peace.
If we can walk that straight line, we can make it through anything,
and we can do it without all the worry.
This line of faith still walks through the ups and downs.
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We still experience the same things, but the difference is our faith is unwavering.
There's a destination, nation, something amazing God has for us if we just continue walking.
Have you ever heard the story of Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego?
(11:56):
In Daniel chapter 3 verses 24 to 25, we see.
Then Nebuchadnezzar the king was astonished, and rose up in haste and spake,
and said unto his counselors, did not we cast three men bound into the midst of the fire?
They answered and said unto the king, true, O king.
(12:18):
He answered and said, lo, I see
four men loose walking in the midst of the fire, and they have no hurt.
And the form of the fourth is like the son of God.
This is what I'm talking about. Walking by faith is like being thrown in the fire, but not burning.
(12:42):
When you walk by faith, the devil and the ways of the world won't deter you
because your entire trust is in the Lord.
You aren't alone. God's with you and he will walk by your side.
When we go through trials, we often feel like God's so far away.
We keep walking and walking and in the wrong direction.
(13:05):
Then we wonder, where is he? Where is God in this? He feels so far away.
But if only you would turn around.
He's there. He's been there the whole time. You've just been walking the wrong way.
Or you weren't walking at all. You were stuck in that place of I give up.
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God is waiting for you. He's ready to embrace you and show you the way back to that path of faith.
True faith is believing when you can't see the end.
You might not even see what's around you in the present.
Fog surrounds you. The haze won't allow you to pass.
But faith will guide your way. As it did Moses through the Red Sea.
(13:55):
If the water is too deep, God can help you walk on water, as Peter did, so you won't drown.
Trust may not be easy for you. I know it isn't for me.
But if we are Christians, it is what God has called us to do.
We must trust, have faith, and believe in Him.
(14:19):
I think my favorite line from the movie The Santa Claus illustrates it well.
Seeing isn't believing.
Believing is seeing. When you believe in him, you are more likely to recognize
his works, his miracles, and his presence.
Sometimes you have to believe before you can receive deliverance from your circumstances.
(14:43):
Clear your mind, lift your worries, and have true faith in the one who loves
you so much he sent his only son to die for you.
Have faith in the one who knows the number of hairs on your head and every thought you've ever had.
Have faith in the one who molded you in your mother's womb and in he who loves
(15:08):
you more than any earthly human could.
Don't give up because God is for you.
We need to have faith during hard times like these, But we also need to have
faith when God is speaking to our hearts.
Is there something you feel like you want to do or you're supposed to do,
(15:31):
but you're afraid to do it?
Are you holding back because you don't know what will happen?
What if you fail? What if you can't do it?
Maybe it's something that seems so far outside your comfort zone,
you don't even understand why you have this conviction.
God can sometimes surprise us, like he did me with starting this podcast. cast.
(15:55):
Every time I put myself out there, I'm scared.
What if this is all for nothing? What if I'm wrong? What if I'm not supposed to do this?
What if people don't like me?
When these questions enter my mind, I remember that the devil is the father of lies.
(16:17):
Every time we doubt God and what he's telling us, it's because we're listening to lies.
It isn't that we might not fail, because we might.
But it's that we forget, even if we do, it isn't the end. We don't have to stop there.
Let's adapt. Let's change. Don't give up.
(16:39):
If God has placed something on your heart, don't stand in your own way.
There could be something phenomenal waiting for you. give it a try.
Believe in yourself because our God is an awesome God and anything is possible.
He knows us better than we know ourselves and he blesses us with gifts we're meant to share.
(17:05):
Have faith and believe in what the Spirit is telling you.
When those doubts enter my mind, The Spirit tells me, how can you fail when
God is calling you to do this?
Remember Romans 8.28?
And we know that for those who love God, all things work together for good.
(17:27):
For those who are called according to His purpose.
God has a purpose for you. Your calling, your conviction, and the pull on your
heart is part of a purpose that will bring about good things.
Something good is going to come from you following God's voice.
(17:50):
It may be something completely different than what we think it'll be,
but what if it changes someone's life for the better?
What if it changes your life for the better?
What if your calling changes the world?
The Holy Spirit gives us power, and that power can do incredible things.
(18:14):
In fact, it's because of God's voice that my son exists today.
You see, my first birth was very scary.
I was in labor for more than 25 hours after my water broke.
My body just would not progress enough, so a C-section it was.
A feeling of pain overwhelmed me.
(18:37):
In the moment, I thought I was about to die. I pictured my husband smiling when
he held our baby girl for the first time, and that brought me peace.
If I was going to die, I knew he loved her. My mind then began to go in and out of reality.
Later, I would come to and find out that I had hemorrhaged and needed a transfusion.
(19:02):
We were able to go home with our baby girl a few days later,
And for a couple of years, we just soaked her up.
After a while, though, I knew I wanted at least one more baby so my daughter could have a sibling.
I love my siblings so much, and I wanted her to experience that kind of love, too.
(19:22):
In 2015, I'd end up being in labor with baby girl number two the day of my scheduled C-section.
This time, the surgery went well. But after, the doctor explained that my uterine
walls were very thin, and if I had done a VBAC, there would have been a pretty
high chance either the baby or I wouldn't have survived.
(19:45):
So once my second daughter grew out of her crib, we sold all her baby things. We were done.
Then when I hit 30, I thought, well, we're really done now, because I don't want kids after 30.
My mom had a lot of trouble with my brother. mother.
All my life, I had wanted three kids, two girls and a boy, just like my mom and my grandmother.
(20:09):
I thought it was too dangerous, so I tried to give up on this dream.
It seems like God had other plans, though.
Back in 2020, I went on a walk in Ohio, where we were living at the time.
I was listening to worship music through my headphones.
The sky was so clear despite the a slight chill in the air.
(20:30):
The sun's warmth kissed my rosy cheeks, and I soaked up the joy that radiated
down from the atmosphere.
There I was, all alone on a well-hidden track behind some tall trees.
All of a sudden, I heard a voice. The voice said, Why won't you have another baby?
(20:53):
I answered, I don't know. Oh, yes, you do, claimed the voice.
I reluctantly responded, fear.
The voice said, What does my word say about fear?
I went home, opened my Bible, and I kid you not, The first verse I saw was Joshua 1.9.
(21:16):
Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous.
Do not be afraid. Do not be discouraged.
For the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.
I immediately was like, okay, I hear you, God.
Seven months later, we found out we were pregnant with baby number three, our boy.
(21:41):
Turns out, though, his birth would be the scariest of all.
My water broke an hour before we were to leave for the hospital.
We arrived, baby was born and healthy. It seemed like things were going great.
Soon after he was born, my spinal stopped working.
I felt almost unbearable pain as they finished stitching me up.
(22:05):
You know those torture tables from the medieval times? that's what I felt like was happening to me.
Eventually, I made it through and into our room.
Soon after that, I began to feel nauseous. Turns out, I was hemorrhaging and clotting.
I have two different blood issues that perplex doctors with how to treat me.
(22:28):
The next thing I knew, the machine was beeping. They were laying me flat. I was about to pass out.
They were running me as quickly as they could, back through the halls,
back to an OR, trying to save my life.
At first, I was terrified.
But then I reminded myself that God told me to have this baby.
(22:49):
Even if I didn't make it, my son must have a great destiny.
He was spoken into existence by the Lord.
This brought me peace, and my fear disappeared. I was put under general anesthesia,
not knowing if I'd wake up again.
Praise God, I would wake up. In the middle of a transfusion,
(23:12):
but feeling much better than I had before.
I say all this to reiterate faith. I trusted God when he spoke to me.
And even when I thought I might die, I trusted that God's plan had purpose.
My faith got me through and blessed us with the gift of our son.
Following God can be scary. Even the disciples had risks in choosing to follow Jesus.
(23:38):
They were beaten, imprisoned, and even killed.
Having faith and doing what we're called to do isn't always the easy thing.
A lot of the time, it can be terrifying, uncomfortable, and challenging to stand
up and do what has been placed on our hearts.
Although sometimes hard, it can also be rewarding.
(24:01):
The gift of my son brings me an unexplainable joy. He fills a hole I didn't even know existed.
God wants to fill the holes in your heart too. What are you waiting for?
Do you need reassurance or perhaps you're waiting for a sign?
If so, this is it. This message is for you.
(24:25):
Go out and share your gifts with the world. Follow the pool on your heart and take that leap of faith.
Do you truly believe Jesus is our Savior?
Do you believe that God is the God of miracles?
If you do, listen to the Holy Spirit. it.
Find your courage within and have faith that God will be with you every step of the way.
(24:51):
Maybe this isn't your season of following your heart.
You might need to have faith through a season of despair. You feel like all hope is lost.
You feel alone. You feel like you don't matter.
The devil tells you, you're a failure.
You're worthless. You'll never make it. No one cares. Just give up.
(25:12):
If this is you, I need you to hear me.
Don't listen to those lies.
God loves you. You are never alone.
Today may not be a happy day. Tomorrow may not be either. Just keep walking.
(25:35):
Find that path of faith. One day, I promise you, something will change.
One day you'll have a glimpse of happiness again.
That glimpse will grow and you can leave the grief, pain, and desperation behind you.
Whether other people want to admit it or not, many of them have felt some of these same feelings.
(25:58):
Other people are going through what you are going through.
Other people feel shame, regret, loneliness, fear, isolation.
But there's hope. There is love out there for you.
Know that I've been there and I'm now on the other side. I can see things clearly
(26:20):
and there's freedom to be had.
Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding.
In all your ways, acknowledge him and he will direct your path.
Proverbs 3, 5, and 6. I know the world can be a cruel and unforgiving place.
(26:42):
Judgment can be a heavy weight to carry.
But faith, faith can set us free. I hope you enjoyed episode 2.
Next time on Graceful Messes and Hopeful Guesses, Deep Dark Secrets and Judgment.
Got a secret? Will you keep it? Look forward to discussing more on episode 3.
(27:07):
Can't wait to see you there.
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