Grief is the New Normal Podcast: S2E27 Modern Loss and the Long Arc of Grief: Rebecca Soffer on What It Really Means to Live with Loss

Grief, Humor, and the Long Arc of Healing: A Conversation with Rebecca Soffer of Modern Loss

In this episode of Grief is the New Normal, Dr. Heather Taylor talks with Rebecca Soffer, the co-founder of the Modern Loss community. Rebecca shares her personal journey through grief after the loss of her parents and the inception of Modern Loss. They discuss the integration of humor in grief, the importance of community, and the inadequacies in grief training for professionals. Rebecca emphasizes the value of creating personal rituals, setting boundaries, and the necessity of levity and joy amidst mourning. The conversation also touches on navigating grief-triggered days like Mother's Day and the benefits of 'going micro' to manage overwhelming emotions.

00:00 Introduction to Grief is the New Normal

00:25 Meet Rebecca Soffer: Founder of Modern Loss

00:38 Rebecca's Personal Journey with Grief

02:32 The Birth of Modern Loss

04:33 Navigating Grief and Loss

06:01 Challenges in Grief Therapy and Training

07:26 Mother's Day and Complicated Grief

18:00 The Importance of Community in Grief

19:36 Humor and Levity in Grief

24:12 Embracing the Grief Wave

24:37 Navigating Through Grief with Resources

24:58 The Bear Hunt Analogy

25:50 Building a Support System

26:41 Going Micro: Small Steps Through Grief

28:16 Mindfulness Techniques for Grief

29:28 Handling Trigger Days

30:48 Creating Coping Plans

31:46 Writing About Grief

32:00 Modern Loss Books

33:38 Staying Connected After Loss

35:24 Communing with the World

36:32 Teaching Others How to Support You

38:45 Final Takeaways on Grief

40:48 Upcoming Projects and Resources

42:58 Conclusion and Call to Action

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Rebecca Soffer is cofounder of Modern Loss, which offers creative, meaningful and encouraging content and community addressing the long arc of grief. She is also the bestselling author of The Modern Loss Handbook: An Interactive Guide to Moving Through Grief and Building Your Resilience (Running Press, 2022), which Gayle King named a favorite book of the year, and coauthor of Modern Loss: Candid Conversation About Grief. Beginners Welcome (Harper Wave, 2018), which The Strategist named a best book on loss for a younger generation.

Rebecca also writes the Modern Loss newsletter, which is one of Substack's top Health & Wellness publications and shares intimate interviews with notable figures on their experiences with loss, including actors Cynthia Nixon, Jessica Williams, and Rachel Bloom; poet Saeed Jones; comedians Jena Friedman and Alyssa Limperis; transgender rights activist Raquel Willis; stylist Stacy London; and many more. She hosts the monthly “Light After Loss” Facebook series for 1800Flowers.com and is an expert contributor for Help Texts. Rebecca has partnered with several organizations developing tailored projects that promote their mission, including the Seleni Institute (raising awareness around perinatal mental health support) and the Parmenter Foundation (developing their UGrieve online grief awareness training course for undergraduates and graduate students). 

 

Rebecca is a Peabody Award-winning former producer for The Colbert Report and an alumna of Columbia University’s Graduate School of Jour