Parenting, Surfing, and Mental Health with Luke Ireland

In this special episode of our podcast, we were delighted to welcome Luke Ireland, a psychologist and local dad, to have some healthy dad conversations during the Wooloware Family Medical Practice Launch. Luke shared some honest and inspiring insights about the pressures of fatherhood, his love for surfing, and how he balances mental and physical health.

Our discussion began with a laid-back conversation about brand loyalty, in this case, to a particular brand of surfing wax. This naturally led us into a broader discussion on surfing as both a physical activity and a practice in mindfulness. Luke's love for surfing goes beyond being a hobby and is incorporated into his approaches to maintain physical and mental fitness.

As a father of four boys, Luke shared the joys and challenges that come with being a dad. From the emotional highs and lows to the unending learning curve that comes with each new age and stage of his kids, Luke bares it all. His openness provided a great insight into the reality of parenting – an activity that is often emotionally draining yet undeniably rewarding.

This episode also delved into the topic of dad health. Physical fitness is one of Luke's major priorities, and he keeps active through surfing and playing golf. Keeping fit not only gives him the stamina to keep up with his energetic kids but also prepares him for adventurous outings like his upcoming 12-day surf trip with friends.

If you're keen to learn more about Luke's work or book an appointment with his practice, 'About Time Psychology,' you can find them on Instagram, Facebook, or call on 9526 3303.

We hope you take away some invaluable insights from this discussion and look forward to bringing more enlightening conversations your way. Stay tuned!

Episode Transcript

(00:00):
All right, we are here at the Willoway Family Medical Practice launch.
We are having some healthy dad conversations.
I'm here with Luke Ireland, Shire local and excellent psychologist in the area. Luke, welcome.
Thank you for having me. Appreciate it.
Now, Luke is a friend of the channel. We've talked to him before.
I am going to give him an icebreaker just to kick things off.

(00:20):
So, Luke, what brand are you loyal to simply out of habit but not because of
its quality? Wow, that's a good question.
God, my first answer would be sex wax, which is...
Which is a brand of surfing wax. Yes, we've all seen that.
And I've had it for a very long time and I don't think I really moved away from it.

(00:43):
So hopefully, yeah, I'd say that that's the brand that I use in surfing,
but I don't know there's probably better quality out there.
So that's actually a good segue because surfing.
Surfing is a really good example. example of mindfulness something else
and i was talking to someone earlier about surf therapy or surf
sessions as part of psychology sure so you
do a lot like you're a psychologist you do a lot of work in the community but

(01:06):
you're also a dad i am and you're a keen surfer i am give us your dad specs
first how many kids you have yep so i got four boys how old the eldest has turned
12 yesterday so 12 10 8 and 4 okay so you're you've sort of been through the
initial years you're You're getting towards those teenage years. Yeah. Okay.

(01:27):
I see a lot of dads. It's one of the times when I see people and I have a chance
to change the trajectory because blokes might come in for a sprain,
an ankle sprain, something like that.
Sure. But when they're a dad, they often take the opportunity to correct their
mental health or engage in their physical health.
Talk to me about the dads you treat. Talk to me about dad life yourself.
So dad life myself, it's probably the hardest thing I've ever done in my life.

(01:48):
I don't know. I think sometimes it's been probably more emotionally painful
than I ever thought it would be. More emotionally beautiful than I ever thought it would be.
Probably the scariest thing I've done. I think because I probably thought that
I would be the best dad that ever existed.
Until I wasn't. Because essentially, you know, I've got a 12-year-old,
but I've never had a 13-year-old.
And then I've got a 10-year-old, but when he turns 12, I've never had that 12-year-old.

(02:11):
So for me, being a dad has been probably the most humbling experience I've ever had.
I absolutely love it. I've probably moved away a little bit from young people
in teens as a result of being a dad.
Not that I can't do it, but I find it a bit challenging sometimes.
If I'm sitting there with a 13 or 14-year-old, I kind of feel like I should be there with my son.
So I've moved into a different space in that regard. So it's the best thing

(02:35):
I do and probably the worst thing I do because I struggle just like everyone else.
I think that probably does help me then talk to other dads because I'm immersed in it.
But it's working with dads for me. I think, I don't know about you,
but I think it's bloody hard being a dad and I don't think there's like a perfect
way and sometimes when you look back,

(02:56):
we're coming back from generations of people who didn't really either know how
to be dads or come from the hard school or different kinds of school and often
dads behind us have had trauma not too far behind too.
Yeah, it's a unique, beautiful experience being a dad, but I wouldn't shame you for anything.
And we've talked about this before. The principle to be vulnerable is not to be weak.

(03:20):
And we do come from that old stock of dads where it was just push through, toughen up, just do it.
And no one really talks about feelings or emotions. They were foreign things.
And you sort of think about that and you're like, what do I want my kid to know
about these things? Do I want my kids to have an emotional intelligence?

(03:41):
And you've got to, it really opens you up to, where do you learn?
And interestingly enough, you use the phrase good enough dad.
And I've actually been listening to a podcast, The Good Enough Dad by Maggie Dent.
Yeah, nice. And the idea of being great is fine.
The idea of being good is fine. But I think being a good enough dad is probably
where I want to land. Okay.
Yeah. So I'm only six weeks into dad journey. Congratulations.

(04:04):
I haven't seen you since then. Congratulations.
It's wonderful. I've got a lot
to learn. But this year we're going to be talking to a lot of dads. Yeah.
If you had to give, and I'm putting you on the spot here, so I do apologize.
If you had to put one to two words to summarize your dad philosophy.
Only two words. Only two words. I'm a man of many words. You can have three.
I'll give you three. I can have three.

(04:30):
Just be kind. Be kind. What a great. Be kind, mate. Be kind to your wife.
Be kind. Be kind to yourself. yourself, be gentle, you know,
I think it's so easy to not be kind and hold yourself to some kind of high esteem.
But that good enough for me, like to be honest, and it might sound reductive,
but for me, I think if your kids are mostly loved and they're safe, that's good enough.

(04:54):
And I think that like on your worst day, you're probably going to meet that,
criteria so if you meet that criteria on your worst day that's enough let's
talk dad health for a moment sure because we don't all have to be marathon runners
but we don't want to be good enough in terms of our health how do you stay healthy
physically mentally like what's your.
How do you stay healthy so i to be

(05:16):
honest i had been gearing to move my practice down
to crinola my whole life so maybe when i started being a therapist thing i was
out of campbell town out of maryland i always want to come back so surf two
three times a week so lunch breaks before work if i can my golf i absolutely
love playing golf to be honest i was a little bit late to this,

(05:38):
scenario because i was picking up a golf club from engadine and
was having a few putts on the golf course so i go for surf and i kid and essentially
when you're doing kid stuff you're always moving so i think if you're moving
is more you move the better you move right so yeah i'm We're actually going
to the Mentiawis in September on a surf trip with 10 mates, which has been like long coming.

(06:00):
So we're going 12 days surfing in the Mentiawis. So I'm pretty much on a journey
of fitness so I can go do that. So definitely.
Well, thank you for having a healthy day conversation. There is a party to enjoy.
Yes. But Luke, if people want to find you, your practice, what's your social
handles? How do they find you? Yeah, sure. It's about time psychology.
And so you can find us on Instagram or Facebook. Facebook give us a call on

(06:23):
9526 3303 and yeah you'll find us there so we've got I think eight eight in
our team now which is cool um just got a new practitioner Liz coming on board
which is really exciting so lots of psychs yeah thanks for having me.