Episode #18: At Some Point, You Have to Put Yourself in the Equation with Stacy Attenberg

Putting yourself first isn’t selfish, it’s survival. This conversation is your reminder that you don’t have to wait until you break to tend to yourself.

This week’s episode is a heart-opening, deeply grounded conversation with Stacy, an independent cat rescuer in Connecticut who’s currently in the process of opening her own feral cat sanctuary! She’s a force of compassion, honesty, and intentional living, and her wisdom is for anyone who gives and gives… but is learning to put themselves back into the equation.

We talk about what it really means to honor yourself without guilt, and how nervous system regulation and daily check-ins can shift everything. Stacy shares why caregivers often feel like they have to suffer to prove their love, and how failed help can lead to deep trust issues and the belief that you have to do it all yourself. We explore the emotional weight of grief, caregiving, and bearing witness to constant loss, and the ways empathy can sometimes feel like a burden.

(If you’d like to support Stacy’s mission and the animals she cares for, you can check out her Amazon Wishlist here!)

This episode is packed with insight around finding mindfulness in the small moments; you don’t need an hour, you just need presence—and how reciprocal spaces are essential before burnout sets in. We talk about practical tools like Mindful Markers that can gently pull you back into your body throughout the day, especially when you’re on the edge of overwhelm.

Stacy opens up about the reality of working in a field that takes a toll on your body, your relationships, and your heart, and how she continues to find her center through self-awareness and community.

She also shares how Sacred Circle became her “emotional defibrillator”—a space unlike any other she’s been a part of—and how deeply impactful it has been to be witnessed and supported in her healing. As she says, “this group is literally my life raft.”

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