May 30, 2025 • 28 mins
In this quietly illuminating episode of In Your Element, Kathleen Kenneally explores the often-invisible impact of energetic boundaries—how we absorb emotions, moods, and even physical sensations that aren’t ours, and what it takes to come back to center. With gentle wisdom and clinical insight, she re-frames boundaries not as walls, but as essential energetic containers that allow the body to relax, process, and ultimately heal.
Kathleen introduces simple tools to help listeners check in with themselves and reclaim their space, from asking “Is this mine?” to visualizing protective bubbles or expanding your own energy outward. She also explains how acupuncture treatments often reveal these entanglements—when a symptom clears almost instantly once a patient reconnects with their own energy. The episode touches on how we’re conditioned to overfunction, override our inner signals, and mistake emotional absorption for compassion. The conversation also grazes the topic of “energy vampires” and how even well-meaning people can affect our field if we’re not grounded in our own.
Whether you identify as an empath, a helper, or someone just trying to stay grounded in a noisy world, this episode offers a refreshing reminder: your energy is yours—and you get to decide what stays. To learn more or book a session, visit kenneallyacupuncture.com.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
IYE Intro (00:00):
Hello and welcome to In Your Element with Kathleen Kenneally,
where we explore the wisdom of naturalhealing and the deeper rhythms of life
from the five elements to live out loud.
Spirituality.
This is a space to reconnect withyour most authentic self, whether
you're seeking balance through Chinesemedicine, tuning into your energetic
(00:20):
blueprint, or fully embracing themost vibrant, alive version of you.
This is your space toexplore, expand, and.
And realign.
Let's dive into today's conversation.
Kathleen Kenneally (00:34):
Hello, and welcome to In Your Element with Kathleen Kali.
How is everybody doing today?
I am so excited to be here.
It's been a minute since Irecorded anything, and, today.
Before I get started, I wantedto first thank everybody.
(00:55):
Thank you so much.
Everybody out there who has been sosupportive, so encouraging, who've
signed up, who've subscribed orfollowed this podcast that I'm creating.
And my hope is that I'm creatingcontent that's interesting.
Something to make you think about,whether it's in Chinese medicine
(01:16):
or other topics of interest.
And, uh, again, I just wanna thankeverybody who's been supporting
me on this journey, and I'm justhaving so much fun with this.
It's just so much fun.
So today I, wanted totalk a little bit about.
Boundaries.
Yeah.
Boundaries.
It's kind of an important thing, right?
It's important that we are pretty clearon what our boundaries are, and that means
(01:41):
our physical boundaries, our emotionalboundaries, our energetic boundaries.
these are areas where, sometimeswe can forget to pay attention to
who are we allowing into Our, youknow, through our boundaries and,
somehow people cross our boundaries.
And if we're not paying attention,then, it's not necessarily
(02:03):
a very supportive thing.
It can drain our energy.
We can feel.
Uh, misunderstood.
people can take charge of things withoutus really actually giving them permission.
We kind of inadvertently give thempermission, by not having firm,
if you will, boundaries around us.
so literally the, the, Webster.
(02:25):
Dictionary, explanation of what aboundary is, is a boundary is a line
or a limit where one thing ends andanother begins, or something that
indicates such a line or limit.
So for example, obviously if there's afence between my land and your land, and
that is a physical boundary that marks.
(02:46):
Where your land begins and my land ends.
And so if we think of our physicalbodies also there's a boundary.
It's like, this is where Ibegin, and you're over there.
And so unless I've given youpermission to touch my physical body
or shake my hand or to hug me or soon, then that's crossing a boundary.
(03:08):
If I haven't given you permissionand sometimes people assume they
have permission, sometimes peopledon't care if they have permission
because they're not paying attention,they're not using discernment as well.
So what do I mean when I talkabout an energetic boundary?
Well, if you can imagine that thehuman body is an energy field, and
(03:32):
in this energy field there are.
different layers around us.
So we have the etheric body, wehave the physical energy body,
we have everything in between.
And so these layers are layers that kindof support our energy field, if you will.
And so.
If someone doesn't have this awareness,let's say for example, pick up the
(03:55):
phone or someone's calling you andit's a good friend and you see who it
is and you're thinking, okay, usuallythey call when they're in crisis.
Usually they call whenthere's something's going on.
And so you pick up the phone becauseyou wanna be that good friend and
they unload all of their story, allof their strife, all of their anxiety,
all of everything that's going on, and.
(04:18):
When you get off the phone, youknow they feel a ton better.
You on the other hand, feel,particularly feel drained.
You might be wiped out.
You might be, oh wow, I'vegotta go have a sip of water.
I've gotta sit down and take a break.
And it's not necessarily against thisother person, but right there, what you
see is, kind of representation of how.
(04:41):
A person's boundaries aren't solid,their energetic boundaries aren't solid,
that they go into situations wide open.
And when we go into a situationwide open, then we have, it's
an open invitation, right?
Anybody can dump their stuff, dump theirfeelings, and if you're a super sensitive
person or an empath such as myself, itcan be devastating at times because when
(05:07):
you're that level of sensitivity, you are.
Feeling everything that someone'stelling you very, very deeply.
And so, you know, in my practice,in what I do, it's actually a really
helpful tool because in that arrangement,there's an agreement that allowed into
this person's boundaries because I'mworking with them to become better,
(05:29):
to help them heal on that emotionallevel, on that physical level, on
that spiritual level in some cases.
And so.
It's in this agreement that,yes, we've agreed that we're
gonna do this work together.
However, in the work that I do,I'm not taking on people's energy.
I'm not taking their emotions.
I'm not taking it intomy field, if you will.
(05:51):
My energy field.
I'm holding space.
My field is supported.
And solid, and I'll get into that ina little bit where I'm gonna actually
give you the technique and some toolsso that you can do this for yourself.
But in that arrangement that I'm workingwith people, then yes, I'm holding an
energetic space to allow people to dotheir own healing, essentially using the
(06:13):
acupuncture and, other tools that I use.
So.
In that instance, it's okay, butI have a solid energetic boundary
field around me to support my field.
So I'm not taking people's stuff onwhile they're sharing their stories
and releasing things that are going onwith them, but out there in the wild.
(06:34):
Sometimes, you know, people don't havethe awareness that they can even do
this, that they can support their field.
And so they're taking on people's stuff.
they're helping their friends, they'resupporting their family and so on.
And so again, I'm not suggesting thatwe're not supposed to help people on
our lives and people that we love.
Of course we are.
That's part of the deal.
(06:54):
You know, it's part of caring for people.
It's just about how to keep your energyseparate from other people's when you
are choosing to be of, help or a service.
So I. As I said, I gave the exampleof, you know, a friend calls up
and you know, okay, here you go.
This is what's gonna happen.
And so a way to, preventthat from happening.
(07:17):
I guess I'll go intothe technique right now.
Uh, one of the ways that I share withmy patients and other people of how
to support your energy field is thatjust imagine if you will take a moment.
That you are surrounding yourselfwith an energetic bubble.
And so this bubble can beany color that you want.
It can have any design that you want.
(07:39):
It can.
It's your bubble.
It's your bubble.
And you're imagining this all around you.
And so I had one of my younger patientsyears ago, and I just love this young
lady, and she was probably about.
13 or 14 when I was working with her.
And she had the brilliant idea whereshe put a layer of jello between
(08:01):
her and inside of her bubble.
So she put some extra padding in there,that that just really worked for her.
And she had different colors andshe'd have different color jello,
but that was like that extra cushion.
And so again, it can be what.
Ever let your creativity andyour imagination go wild?
It can be whatever you wish itto be, with the intention that it
(08:24):
is supporting your energy field.
Now let me stop here for a momentbecause I wanna clarify that I use
the word support your energy field.
You may hear other people talk aboutcreating a bubble, and you may hear
people talking about protection.
I'm creating an energyprotection field around myself.
(08:44):
Now, I'm not saying there's anything wrongwith framing it in that way, but for me,
I feel more comfortable thinking that Iam supporting my field so that my field
can sustain and I can come up againstany kind of energy, and I know that I'm
supported, which keeps me strong Now.
(09:05):
Again, the whole idea of needingprotection for me, again, I'm
speaking for myself, is that I choosenot to engage with things that.
Bring me into a state of fear.
So if I'm feeling that I need protection,for example, then for me that is basically
cooking into the energy that I am fearfuland therefore I need to be protected.
(09:30):
So I choose not to choose fear asopposed to I want to support my
field to keep me strong, so I amable to manage whatever comes my way.
So anyway, go ahead.
And you're creating this bubble withthe intention to support yourself
and this bubble is, stays in place.
(09:51):
And so, for example, I'll be brushingmy teeth every morning and I, I imagine
that I'm putting my bubble on and Iput whatever color I wanna wear for
the day, and maybe I stick an extrapadding in there, an extra layer,
whatever, rocks my boat for that day.
And then I go about the day and maybeI'll see eight or 10 patients and
we have, you know, I have wonderfultreatments and people are feeling better.
(10:13):
And so with that then, you know,throughout the day sometimes, and if
you can imagine this too, and this iswhat I like to think about is that all
those thought forms what people arethinking and what they're releasing and
what they're talking about and so on,get stuck on the outside of my bubble.
'cause they're notgetting through my bubble.
I'm not taking anybody's stuff on.
It's not getting through.
(10:33):
So it kind of gets stuck on the outside.
So I might check in a little bit and go,huh, let me see how my bubble's feeling.
Is it feeling a little sticky?
And if it's feeling a littlesticky, then I will peel it off.
Imagine that I take it offand then I put a clean one on.
Now you don't have to do that.
It's just kind of, I'm workingwith people all day long.
(10:53):
I'm having a lot of conversations and so Ichoose to do that as a way of just, yeah,
I call it my energetic hygiene, right?
Keeping my energy field clear.
So that is one technique and again.
Please feel free.
You can modify it.
You can change it up.
These are just guidelines.
It can be anything you want it to be.
(11:14):
Okay?
Now, another way of doing that, whichis slightly different, same idea,
is that you imagine your own energyfield around your body, and you
imagine that you are pushing it out.
Away from your body that you arepushing out this light, this field
of energy around you, so thatthere are no cracks, there are no
spaces for anything to come in.
(11:35):
So again, one is creating somethingaround you in terms of like a bubble.
The other way is just imaginingthat you're pushing your field
out so far that other people'senergy and stuff can't get to you.
Now, the question might come up with.
If I am, sealing off my energyfield, how can I still be that
(11:55):
compassionate, loving friend?
how can I be available for peopleif I'm closing up my energy?
Now, here's the thing to just clarify.
The energy's actually, you're notclosing off your energy per se.
You're just supporting the field, okay?
And the second part of that is that.
(12:16):
In order for us to truly support somebodyelse, we have to keep our field supported.
we can still be loving and kind andcompassionate and there for people, but it
is not our job to take people's energy on.
Now again, people that are supersensitive, they feel so much all the
time, and so it's really important tomake sure that you do sort of practice
(12:41):
like this to support your energy field.
You can still have fun, you can stilllaugh, you can still be loving all
of those things, but you're not.
Taking people's stuff on.
And sometimes, and I, don't reallylike this term, but may have heard
it before, there are people thatare referred to as energy vampires.
Now, again, it is not typicallythe intention of the person that
(13:06):
they are like, ah, I'm gonnago suck that person's energy.
But there are some people that areso energetically deficient that they
don't have the ability to generatetheir own energy that they actually do.
draw on other people's energy andthat can also be kind of exhausting.
and it's not intentional.
It's not, you know, there's not likethis thought process, but it can happen.
(13:29):
And so these people get theirenergy from other people.
I. And so again, another good reason tojust get into the practice of supporting
your field, and I'm sure many of you outthere can, probably think of a time where
you met somebody and you meet somebodyand you feel energized after you meet
them or you meet somebody and you'rejust wiped out and it's, they could come.
(13:51):
In the exact same way, speak to,in the exact same manner, have the
exact same conversation and the wayyou feel when that person leaves.
It could be miles apart,completely different.
One way you're feeling energized and theother way you're feeling drained and.
That's just how it goes.
and part of that too is sometimespeople's energies don't mesh
(14:14):
completely, but more likely.
It's just some people, have a tendencyto pull off other people's energy
versus, it's kind of like, I seeit as a recycling, you know, when
you're interacting with somebody thatyou're sharing energy between you.
So it's recycled and moving backand forth again, back to the
supporting of your energy field.
Then you kind of neutralize thosetypes of, energetic hijacking.
(14:37):
I guess that's kind of a wayof like thinking about it.
energetic breach, um, boundariesbeing crossed and so on.
So.
It's really, really importantto do this practice.
So again, it's pretty simple.
Those are the two ways, likeI said, modify it any way
that you feel comfortable.
Okay, so another thing I wanted tokind of touch on is the idea of, okay,
(15:01):
how do you know when you're feelingsomething that belongs to you or you feel
something that belongs to somebody else?
So.
Right.
You're kind of going, what?
So.
we go around, we go through ourday and let's say we're standing
in line in the market, or actually,I'll give you a real story.
(15:25):
I was actually at the post office one day.
I'm standing in line and you know, thepost office is notoriously famous for
being crowded along the lines of people.
Oftentimes people are alittle cranky because they,
it doesn't move very quickly.
And so I'm standing in linewaiting to buy my stamps and.
I was standing there just perfectlyhappy, minding my own business, and
(15:46):
suddenly I started feeling reallyirritable, like out of the blue.
Cranky, irritable, just like,what the heck is going on?
and I thought to myself, and thisis kind of, I'm sharing this because
this is what you can do also,is you ask the simple question.
Now again, you don't have to haveany special powers to do this.
(16:06):
You don't have to consider, it'sjust a check in with yourself.
Right?
We can all do that.
And so I stopped and I checked inand I asked myself the question.
does this emotion belong to me?
Is this my emotion, this feeling,angry, irritable, and whatnot?
Or does this belong to somebody else?
Now, think about that for a minute.
(16:27):
I know that might sound a littleout there, but it could be
a very simple, simple thing.
Another simple practice of checking inand saying, Hey, does this belong to me?
Or does this belong to somebody else?
And then you can wait.
And either you'll get a feelingperhaps or you'll get a sense of
a, yes, it's mine, or no it's not.
(16:48):
Or like I hear things, I'llhear, no, it's not yours.
Or just, no.
Is this mine?
No.
Okay.
and.
When I get whatever the, yes,it's yours, and then I might say,
okay, why am I feeling like this?
And so on.
I go down that rabbit holeor just questioning but if it
says no, then I stop because itdoesn't matter who it belongs to.
(17:10):
It doesn't matter at all.
In that instance, when I was standingin the line about three people
down behind me, there was somebodyon their cell phone and they were
angry and they were irritable andthey were talking to somebody and
they were not, not happy campers.
And because I'm such an empath, 'causeI'm so sensitive, I inadvertently, they
(17:30):
were projecting this energy out thereand then I was inadvertently picking
it up and somehow I had taken it on.
Maybe I hadn't done mypractice that day, who knows?
But in that moment, I waspicking up on their irritation.
So again, just to review, if youwanna do this for yourself, anytime
that you're feeling out of sorts,and again, it doesn't have to be
(17:51):
somebody that's three people down.
It could be, you know, you'repicking on what was going on
with your kid, you're picking upsomething else from somebody else.
It's, it's more important to ask thequestion, does this belong to me?
And if it's yes, then you can,continue to ask questions.
Like, oh gosh, why am I feeling like this?
What's going on?
But if you get a no, here's what I do.
(18:13):
I send it back.
I. What does that mean?
That means in that moment, Iunderstand that this emotion that
I'm feeling does not belong to me.
And so I just consciously justsay, okay, I'm gonna send this
back to whoever it belongs to.
Again, not important toknow who it belongs to.
It's really not.
Don't waste your energytrying to figure that out.
(18:34):
And you just send it back, you release itand send it back to whoever it belongs to
because it is for them to process through.
And that's it.
Simple end of story.
So again, these are just some tips, again,modifying it the way it works for you.
But this is what I do in my own personalpractices to keep my energetic boundaries
(18:57):
and support, my energetic field.
So.
Along with that technique, which is reallyimportant 'cause identifying what belongs
to me, what belongs to somebody else.
Again, going back tothe first story where.
You know, you're on the phoneand you've somehow taken on your
friend's stuff and you're feelingwiped out and they feel great.
Right?
All you can stop all of that.
(19:18):
Right.
And so the last thing, last story Iwanna share with you is the idea of,
for example, I'll get another story.
A friend of mine was tellingme a story about how.
She was in a yoga class and afterthe yoga class, a woman came up to
her and said, oh, I saw that therewas all this energetic block in your
(19:39):
system, in your body, and I justwent ahead and cleared it for you.
So when this person showed the storywith me, I was dumbfounded, truly,
because that is such a boundary crossing.
hundred percent because first of all,you never do a healing on somebody
without asking their permission.
(20:02):
that's just kind of like a basic rule.
it's just, energetic courtesy.
It's just not appropriate toautomatically do some healing on
somebody or clear something on somebodywithout asking their permission first.
and so.
Again, that's an energetic boundary.
That's like somebody has notrespected your boundaries now
and it's just as disrespectful ifyou will, as somebody that's not
(20:26):
respecting your physical boundaries.
Like you say, Nope, Idon't want to be hugged.
Well, that's an, that's different.
So you get, don't wanna behugged and then they hug you.
But even that, if someonejust comes up and hugs you and
you don't really know them.
Then it's like, whoa, whoa, whoa.
Wait a second.
Who are you?
I'll give you another story.
Another friend of minewas telling me a story.
(20:46):
She was at a, like a Oh.
Wanting to have those crystalfairs, right, where there's
lots and lots of crystals and.
Healers and so on, and they were atthis crystal booth looking at some
stuff and a woman came up out of theblue and walked over to my friend's
friend and put her hands on her lowback and then said, oh, I can feel
(21:08):
that you're having some back problems.
Is it okay if I touch you?
Well, she was already touching her.
She didn't really ask permission.
She just went in there and touchedher and decided upon herself that she
was going to run energy or whatever.
Again.
You never do a healing on somebody.
Now, my friend's friend was like,oh yeah, sure, you can heal me.
(21:29):
Yeah, heal me.
Go ahead, touch me without evenconsidering for a moment who
this person other person was.
Um, again, it's discernment.
It's paying attention, it's beingaware of your own boundaries
that you don't want just anybody.
Touching you doing healing work thatyou don't even know you don't want.
But there's this kind of thing that canhappen where people say yes before they've
(21:54):
actually given it a proper consideration.
And so again, I sharethese stories with you.
Just the one case, the person didn't knowthat this person did a healing on them.
And the, uh, second case, itwas more like they kind of asked
permission, but they didn't.
And so I think it's justreally, really important.
(22:16):
Pay attention to your boundaries.
Pay attention to who you allowinto your boundaries and know
that, It's important because.
If we don't set boundaries that are onlygonna be people that are always going
to, jump the border, if you will, comeon in, you know, because if we haven't
created a boundary, then the assumptionis we've invited them in, which is not
(22:39):
correct, which is not always the case.
Right?
So.
Again, to review thethings we've talked about.
We've talked about energeticboundaries, we've talked about physical
boundaries, the whole idea of permeableboundaries that are kind of flexible.
Where, hmm, do I need to set a boundary?
Um, is it important to set a boundary?
Is this, or you're just not even payingattention about your boundaries or,
(23:03):
you know, you make accommodations forother people where it's like, Nope,
I need to have my firm boundary.
And so.
Again, these boundaries also extendto what we allow people to say to
us, how we allow people to treat us.
And so I wanna encourage everybody who'slistening, you know, be kind to yourself.
(23:26):
Keep your energy supported.
Be selective with who you let into yourenergy field and trust your inner knowing
to know the difference with who it feelsokay and safe, and who perhaps you don't.
And it's not that that otherperson Has any bad intention.
Again, these examples I've given you todaycould be just, you know, the intention
(23:50):
was to be helpful, but again, it wasnot, it was crossing boundaries, so.
Hopefully these are some helpful tipsthat you can practice it on yourself,
you can share with other people sothat you always have know and have the
ability to support your energy field andpractice checking in with yourself to
(24:13):
find out is that somebody else's energy?
Is that somebody else'semotion or is that my emotion?
And I'm telling you, if you do some ofthese practices, support your energy.
And check in with the emotionsand something I didn't spend
any time talking about, but.
Perhaps I'll get to it next time.
But basically the last thing that Iwant, maybe I'll just quickly mention
it, is about when you feel yourselfhooked into somebody else's energy.
(24:38):
Like I said, you can send it backto them, whoever they are, and then
another part you can do is cut cords.
If you can imagine that these, these,cords of energy that are attaching us
to other people and other people will.
Connect to us.
Again, not consciously, but they getconnected that those cords need to be cut.
The only cords that stay intact,that stay throughout our lives are
(25:01):
the cords that are connected toour parents and to our children.
I. And just for those people outthere that are going, oh, but I
wanna be connected to my husband.
I wanna be, have cords to this.
No, you do not because you areprocessing their stuff, their emotions
through those energetic cords.
(25:21):
And people need to be ableto process their own stuff.
And we've got our, each of ushas enough for us to process.
That we don't need to takeon any, anybody else's stuff.
I hope that makes sense.
I know I've kind of just thrownthis in at at the last minute here,
but that's another part of thisenergetic hygiene, is to cut the
cords between us and other people.
(25:41):
And again, you don't evenneed to know who's corded you.
It's not important,it's just the awareness.
So it's something that Imight do automatically.
Once or twice a day, and I just place theintention that I'm, I imagine scissors and
I'm cutting all cords that are attachedto me from other people, and I just cut
and release and clear so that my energyis clear and we can still get corded even
(26:05):
if we've got, if we've got our energy.
Bubble.
that's much more challenging tobecome corded by somebody else.
So what I'll do is I'lljust ask to cut any cords.
I'll cut any cords, cut any cords,and then I'll put my bubble on.
and then again, I kind of check in and Imight just, you know, throw it out there.
It doesn't hurt anything.
And, It can only cut the cords that arenot essential, meaning the ones that
(26:29):
are not connected to your children.
And by the way, even if you don'tcorded to your spouse or your
friends or people, you are still ahundred percent connected to them.
It does not take away fromyour connection to that person.
It's just these chords are kind ofextraneous and they're not necessary.
So I hope that kind of makes sense.
(26:50):
anyway, if you have any desire to do someemotional clearing, do some mentoring with
me, to talk more about individually, howyou can, support your energy, step into
a more authentic version of yourself.
want to clear emotional blocks thatyou are experiencing that perhaps
(27:12):
are slowing down your whole healingprocess, then give me a call.
I would love to talk to you.
I would love to do an, exploration call.
find out.
If there's any way that I can beof service, I use acupuncture, I do
essential oils, there's all kindsof ways that we can address things.
And I'm here to help.
I am here to help.
(27:32):
And so with that, thank you somuch again for your support.
Thanks for joining me today.
I hope that there is something of value.
And until next time, from my heartto yours, sending you lots of love.
I'll see you soon.
IYE Outro (27:48):
Thank you for joining me today on In Your Element.
I hope this conversation has sparkeda new awareness of how you can
align with the natural rhythms ofyour body and the world around you.
If you enjoyed today's episode, be sureto subscribe so you don't miss what's
next and if something resonated with you.
I'd really love to hear from you.
Connect with me atkenneallyacupuncture.com
(28:10):
or on social media.
Until next time, stay balanced,stay inspired, and keep tuning into
the wisdom within and around you.
See you next time on in Your element.
Hello and welcome to In Your Element with Kathleen Kenneally,
where we explore the wisdom of naturalhealing and the deeper rhythms of life
from the five elements to live out loud.
Spirituality.
This is a space to reconnect withyour most authentic self, whether
you're seeking balance through Chinesemedicine, tuning into your energetic
(00:20):
blueprint, or fully embracing themost vibrant, alive version of you.
This is your space toexplore, expand, and.
And realign.
Let's dive into today's conversation.
Kathleen Kenneally (00:34):
Hello, and welcome to In Your Element with Kathleen Kali.
How is everybody doing today?
I am so excited to be here.
It's been a minute since Irecorded anything, and, today.
Before I get started, I wantedto first thank everybody.
(00:55):
Thank you so much.
Everybody out there who has been sosupportive, so encouraging, who've
signed up, who've subscribed orfollowed this podcast that I'm creating.
And my hope is that I'm creatingcontent that's interesting.
Something to make you think about,whether it's in Chinese medicine
(01:16):
or other topics of interest.
And, uh, again, I just wanna thankeverybody who's been supporting
me on this journey, and I'm justhaving so much fun with this.
It's just so much fun.
So today I, wanted totalk a little bit about.
Boundaries.
Yeah.
Boundaries.
It's kind of an important thing, right?
It's important that we are pretty clearon what our boundaries are, and that means
(01:41):
our physical boundaries, our emotionalboundaries, our energetic boundaries.
these are areas where, sometimeswe can forget to pay attention to
who are we allowing into Our, youknow, through our boundaries and,
somehow people cross our boundaries.
And if we're not paying attention,then, it's not necessarily
(02:03):
a very supportive thing.
It can drain our energy.
We can feel.
Uh, misunderstood.
people can take charge of things withoutus really actually giving them permission.
We kind of inadvertently give thempermission, by not having firm,
if you will, boundaries around us.
so literally the, the, Webster.
(02:25):
Dictionary, explanation of what aboundary is, is a boundary is a line
or a limit where one thing ends andanother begins, or something that
indicates such a line or limit.
So for example, obviously if there's afence between my land and your land, and
that is a physical boundary that marks.
(02:46):
Where your land begins and my land ends.
And so if we think of our physicalbodies also there's a boundary.
It's like, this is where Ibegin, and you're over there.
And so unless I've given youpermission to touch my physical body
or shake my hand or to hug me or soon, then that's crossing a boundary.
(03:08):
If I haven't given you permissionand sometimes people assume they
have permission, sometimes peopledon't care if they have permission
because they're not paying attention,they're not using discernment as well.
So what do I mean when I talkabout an energetic boundary?
Well, if you can imagine that thehuman body is an energy field, and
(03:32):
in this energy field there are.
different layers around us.
So we have the etheric body, wehave the physical energy body,
we have everything in between.
And so these layers are layers that kindof support our energy field, if you will.
And so.
If someone doesn't have this awareness,let's say for example, pick up the
(03:55):
phone or someone's calling you andit's a good friend and you see who it
is and you're thinking, okay, usuallythey call when they're in crisis.
Usually they call whenthere's something's going on.
And so you pick up the phone becauseyou wanna be that good friend and
they unload all of their story, allof their strife, all of their anxiety,
all of everything that's going on, and.
(04:18):
When you get off the phone, youknow they feel a ton better.
You on the other hand, feel,particularly feel drained.
You might be wiped out.
You might be, oh wow, I'vegotta go have a sip of water.
I've gotta sit down and take a break.
And it's not necessarily against thisother person, but right there, what you
see is, kind of representation of how.
(04:41):
A person's boundaries aren't solid,their energetic boundaries aren't solid,
that they go into situations wide open.
And when we go into a situationwide open, then we have, it's
an open invitation, right?
Anybody can dump their stuff, dump theirfeelings, and if you're a super sensitive
person or an empath such as myself, itcan be devastating at times because when
(05:07):
you're that level of sensitivity, you are.
Feeling everything that someone'stelling you very, very deeply.
And so, you know, in my practice,in what I do, it's actually a really
helpful tool because in that arrangement,there's an agreement that allowed into
this person's boundaries because I'mworking with them to become better,
(05:29):
to help them heal on that emotionallevel, on that physical level, on
that spiritual level in some cases.
And so.
It's in this agreement that,yes, we've agreed that we're
gonna do this work together.
However, in the work that I do,I'm not taking on people's energy.
I'm not taking their emotions.
I'm not taking it intomy field, if you will.
(05:51):
My energy field.
I'm holding space.
My field is supported.
And solid, and I'll get into that ina little bit where I'm gonna actually
give you the technique and some toolsso that you can do this for yourself.
But in that arrangement that I'm workingwith people, then yes, I'm holding an
energetic space to allow people to dotheir own healing, essentially using the
(06:13):
acupuncture and, other tools that I use.
So.
In that instance, it's okay, butI have a solid energetic boundary
field around me to support my field.
So I'm not taking people's stuff onwhile they're sharing their stories
and releasing things that are going onwith them, but out there in the wild.
(06:34):
Sometimes, you know, people don't havethe awareness that they can even do
this, that they can support their field.
And so they're taking on people's stuff.
they're helping their friends, they'resupporting their family and so on.
And so again, I'm not suggesting thatwe're not supposed to help people on
our lives and people that we love.
Of course we are.
That's part of the deal.
(06:54):
You know, it's part of caring for people.
It's just about how to keep your energyseparate from other people's when you
are choosing to be of, help or a service.
So I. As I said, I gave the exampleof, you know, a friend calls up
and you know, okay, here you go.
This is what's gonna happen.
And so a way to, preventthat from happening.
(07:17):
I guess I'll go intothe technique right now.
Uh, one of the ways that I share withmy patients and other people of how
to support your energy field is thatjust imagine if you will take a moment.
That you are surrounding yourselfwith an energetic bubble.
And so this bubble can beany color that you want.
It can have any design that you want.
(07:39):
It can.
It's your bubble.
It's your bubble.
And you're imagining this all around you.
And so I had one of my younger patientsyears ago, and I just love this young
lady, and she was probably about.
13 or 14 when I was working with her.
And she had the brilliant idea whereshe put a layer of jello between
(08:01):
her and inside of her bubble.
So she put some extra padding in there,that that just really worked for her.
And she had different colors andshe'd have different color jello,
but that was like that extra cushion.
And so again, it can be what.
Ever let your creativity andyour imagination go wild?
It can be whatever you wish itto be, with the intention that it
(08:24):
is supporting your energy field.
Now let me stop here for a momentbecause I wanna clarify that I use
the word support your energy field.
You may hear other people talk aboutcreating a bubble, and you may hear
people talking about protection.
I'm creating an energyprotection field around myself.
(08:44):
Now, I'm not saying there's anything wrongwith framing it in that way, but for me,
I feel more comfortable thinking that Iam supporting my field so that my field
can sustain and I can come up againstany kind of energy, and I know that I'm
supported, which keeps me strong Now.
(09:05):
Again, the whole idea of needingprotection for me, again, I'm
speaking for myself, is that I choosenot to engage with things that.
Bring me into a state of fear.
So if I'm feeling that I need protection,for example, then for me that is basically
cooking into the energy that I am fearfuland therefore I need to be protected.
(09:30):
So I choose not to choose fear asopposed to I want to support my
field to keep me strong, so I amable to manage whatever comes my way.
So anyway, go ahead.
And you're creating this bubble withthe intention to support yourself
and this bubble is, stays in place.
(09:51):
And so, for example, I'll be brushingmy teeth every morning and I, I imagine
that I'm putting my bubble on and Iput whatever color I wanna wear for
the day, and maybe I stick an extrapadding in there, an extra layer,
whatever, rocks my boat for that day.
And then I go about the day and maybeI'll see eight or 10 patients and
we have, you know, I have wonderfultreatments and people are feeling better.
(10:13):
And so with that then, you know,throughout the day sometimes, and if
you can imagine this too, and this iswhat I like to think about is that all
those thought forms what people arethinking and what they're releasing and
what they're talking about and so on,get stuck on the outside of my bubble.
'cause they're notgetting through my bubble.
I'm not taking anybody's stuff on.
It's not getting through.
(10:33):
So it kind of gets stuck on the outside.
So I might check in a little bit and go,huh, let me see how my bubble's feeling.
Is it feeling a little sticky?
And if it's feeling a littlesticky, then I will peel it off.
Imagine that I take it offand then I put a clean one on.
Now you don't have to do that.
It's just kind of, I'm workingwith people all day long.
(10:53):
I'm having a lot of conversations and so Ichoose to do that as a way of just, yeah,
I call it my energetic hygiene, right?
Keeping my energy field clear.
So that is one technique and again.
Please feel free.
You can modify it.
You can change it up.
These are just guidelines.
It can be anything you want it to be.
(11:14):
Okay?
Now, another way of doing that, whichis slightly different, same idea,
is that you imagine your own energyfield around your body, and you
imagine that you are pushing it out.
Away from your body that you arepushing out this light, this field
of energy around you, so thatthere are no cracks, there are no
spaces for anything to come in.
(11:35):
So again, one is creating somethingaround you in terms of like a bubble.
The other way is just imaginingthat you're pushing your field
out so far that other people'senergy and stuff can't get to you.
Now, the question might come up with.
If I am, sealing off my energyfield, how can I still be that
(11:55):
compassionate, loving friend?
how can I be available for peopleif I'm closing up my energy?
Now, here's the thing to just clarify.
The energy's actually, you're notclosing off your energy per se.
You're just supporting the field, okay?
And the second part of that is that.
(12:16):
In order for us to truly support somebodyelse, we have to keep our field supported.
we can still be loving and kind andcompassionate and there for people, but it
is not our job to take people's energy on.
Now again, people that are supersensitive, they feel so much all the
time, and so it's really important tomake sure that you do sort of practice
(12:41):
like this to support your energy field.
You can still have fun, you can stilllaugh, you can still be loving all
of those things, but you're not.
Taking people's stuff on.
And sometimes, and I, don't reallylike this term, but may have heard
it before, there are people thatare referred to as energy vampires.
Now, again, it is not typicallythe intention of the person that
(13:06):
they are like, ah, I'm gonnago suck that person's energy.
But there are some people that areso energetically deficient that they
don't have the ability to generatetheir own energy that they actually do.
draw on other people's energy andthat can also be kind of exhausting.
and it's not intentional.
It's not, you know, there's not likethis thought process, but it can happen.
(13:29):
And so these people get theirenergy from other people.
I. And so again, another good reason tojust get into the practice of supporting
your field, and I'm sure many of you outthere can, probably think of a time where
you met somebody and you meet somebodyand you feel energized after you meet
them or you meet somebody and you'rejust wiped out and it's, they could come.
(13:51):
In the exact same way, speak to,in the exact same manner, have the
exact same conversation and the wayyou feel when that person leaves.
It could be miles apart,completely different.
One way you're feeling energized and theother way you're feeling drained and.
That's just how it goes.
and part of that too is sometimespeople's energies don't mesh
(14:14):
completely, but more likely.
It's just some people, have a tendencyto pull off other people's energy
versus, it's kind of like, I seeit as a recycling, you know, when
you're interacting with somebody thatyou're sharing energy between you.
So it's recycled and moving backand forth again, back to the
supporting of your energy field.
Then you kind of neutralize thosetypes of, energetic hijacking.
(14:37):
I guess that's kind of a wayof like thinking about it.
energetic breach, um, boundariesbeing crossed and so on.
So.
It's really, really importantto do this practice.
So again, it's pretty simple.
Those are the two ways, likeI said, modify it any way
that you feel comfortable.
Okay, so another thing I wanted tokind of touch on is the idea of, okay,
(15:01):
how do you know when you're feelingsomething that belongs to you or you feel
something that belongs to somebody else?
So.
Right.
You're kind of going, what?
So.
we go around, we go through ourday and let's say we're standing
in line in the market, or actually,I'll give you a real story.
(15:25):
I was actually at the post office one day.
I'm standing in line and you know, thepost office is notoriously famous for
being crowded along the lines of people.
Oftentimes people are alittle cranky because they,
it doesn't move very quickly.
And so I'm standing in linewaiting to buy my stamps and.
I was standing there just perfectlyhappy, minding my own business, and
(15:46):
suddenly I started feeling reallyirritable, like out of the blue.
Cranky, irritable, just like,what the heck is going on?
and I thought to myself, and thisis kind of, I'm sharing this because
this is what you can do also,is you ask the simple question.
Now again, you don't have to haveany special powers to do this.
(16:06):
You don't have to consider, it'sjust a check in with yourself.
Right?
We can all do that.
And so I stopped and I checked inand I asked myself the question.
does this emotion belong to me?
Is this my emotion, this feeling,angry, irritable, and whatnot?
Or does this belong to somebody else?
Now, think about that for a minute.
(16:27):
I know that might sound a littleout there, but it could be
a very simple, simple thing.
Another simple practice of checking inand saying, Hey, does this belong to me?
Or does this belong to somebody else?
And then you can wait.
And either you'll get a feelingperhaps or you'll get a sense of
a, yes, it's mine, or no it's not.
(16:48):
Or like I hear things, I'llhear, no, it's not yours.
Or just, no.
Is this mine?
No.
Okay.
and.
When I get whatever the, yes,it's yours, and then I might say,
okay, why am I feeling like this?
And so on.
I go down that rabbit holeor just questioning but if it
says no, then I stop because itdoesn't matter who it belongs to.
(17:10):
It doesn't matter at all.
In that instance, when I was standingin the line about three people
down behind me, there was somebodyon their cell phone and they were
angry and they were irritable andthey were talking to somebody and
they were not, not happy campers.
And because I'm such an empath, 'causeI'm so sensitive, I inadvertently, they
(17:30):
were projecting this energy out thereand then I was inadvertently picking
it up and somehow I had taken it on.
Maybe I hadn't done mypractice that day, who knows?
But in that moment, I waspicking up on their irritation.
So again, just to review, if youwanna do this for yourself, anytime
that you're feeling out of sorts,and again, it doesn't have to be
(17:51):
somebody that's three people down.
It could be, you know, you'repicking on what was going on
with your kid, you're picking upsomething else from somebody else.
It's, it's more important to ask thequestion, does this belong to me?
And if it's yes, then you can,continue to ask questions.
Like, oh gosh, why am I feeling like this?
What's going on?
But if you get a no, here's what I do.
(18:13):
I send it back.
I. What does that mean?
That means in that moment, Iunderstand that this emotion that
I'm feeling does not belong to me.
And so I just consciously justsay, okay, I'm gonna send this
back to whoever it belongs to.
Again, not important toknow who it belongs to.
It's really not.
Don't waste your energytrying to figure that out.
(18:34):
And you just send it back, you release itand send it back to whoever it belongs to
because it is for them to process through.
And that's it.
Simple end of story.
So again, these are just some tips, again,modifying it the way it works for you.
But this is what I do in my own personalpractices to keep my energetic boundaries
(18:57):
and support, my energetic field.
So.
Along with that technique, which is reallyimportant 'cause identifying what belongs
to me, what belongs to somebody else.
Again, going back tothe first story where.
You know, you're on the phoneand you've somehow taken on your
friend's stuff and you're feelingwiped out and they feel great.
Right?
All you can stop all of that.
(19:18):
Right.
And so the last thing, last story Iwanna share with you is the idea of,
for example, I'll get another story.
A friend of mine was tellingme a story about how.
She was in a yoga class and afterthe yoga class, a woman came up to
her and said, oh, I saw that therewas all this energetic block in your
(19:39):
system, in your body, and I justwent ahead and cleared it for you.
So when this person showed the storywith me, I was dumbfounded, truly,
because that is such a boundary crossing.
hundred percent because first of all,you never do a healing on somebody
without asking their permission.
(20:02):
that's just kind of like a basic rule.
it's just, energetic courtesy.
It's just not appropriate toautomatically do some healing on
somebody or clear something on somebodywithout asking their permission first.
and so.
Again, that's an energetic boundary.
That's like somebody has notrespected your boundaries now
and it's just as disrespectful ifyou will, as somebody that's not
(20:26):
respecting your physical boundaries.
Like you say, Nope, Idon't want to be hugged.
Well, that's an, that's different.
So you get, don't wanna behugged and then they hug you.
But even that, if someonejust comes up and hugs you and
you don't really know them.
Then it's like, whoa, whoa, whoa.
Wait a second.
Who are you?
I'll give you another story.
Another friend of minewas telling me a story.
(20:46):
She was at a, like a Oh.
Wanting to have those crystalfairs, right, where there's
lots and lots of crystals and.
Healers and so on, and they were atthis crystal booth looking at some
stuff and a woman came up out of theblue and walked over to my friend's
friend and put her hands on her lowback and then said, oh, I can feel
(21:08):
that you're having some back problems.
Is it okay if I touch you?
Well, she was already touching her.
She didn't really ask permission.
She just went in there and touchedher and decided upon herself that she
was going to run energy or whatever.
Again.
You never do a healing on somebody.
Now, my friend's friend was like,oh yeah, sure, you can heal me.
(21:29):
Yeah, heal me.
Go ahead, touch me without evenconsidering for a moment who
this person other person was.
Um, again, it's discernment.
It's paying attention, it's beingaware of your own boundaries
that you don't want just anybody.
Touching you doing healing work thatyou don't even know you don't want.
But there's this kind of thing that canhappen where people say yes before they've
(21:54):
actually given it a proper consideration.
And so again, I sharethese stories with you.
Just the one case, the person didn't knowthat this person did a healing on them.
And the, uh, second case, itwas more like they kind of asked
permission, but they didn't.
And so I think it's justreally, really important.
(22:16):
Pay attention to your boundaries.
Pay attention to who you allowinto your boundaries and know
that, It's important because.
If we don't set boundaries that are onlygonna be people that are always going
to, jump the border, if you will, comeon in, you know, because if we haven't
created a boundary, then the assumptionis we've invited them in, which is not
(22:39):
correct, which is not always the case.
Right?
So.
Again, to review thethings we've talked about.
We've talked about energeticboundaries, we've talked about physical
boundaries, the whole idea of permeableboundaries that are kind of flexible.
Where, hmm, do I need to set a boundary?
Um, is it important to set a boundary?
Is this, or you're just not even payingattention about your boundaries or,
(23:03):
you know, you make accommodations forother people where it's like, Nope,
I need to have my firm boundary.
And so.
Again, these boundaries also extendto what we allow people to say to
us, how we allow people to treat us.
And so I wanna encourage everybody who'slistening, you know, be kind to yourself.
(23:26):
Keep your energy supported.
Be selective with who you let into yourenergy field and trust your inner knowing
to know the difference with who it feelsokay and safe, and who perhaps you don't.
And it's not that that otherperson Has any bad intention.
Again, these examples I've given you todaycould be just, you know, the intention
(23:50):
was to be helpful, but again, it wasnot, it was crossing boundaries, so.
Hopefully these are some helpful tipsthat you can practice it on yourself,
you can share with other people sothat you always have know and have the
ability to support your energy field andpractice checking in with yourself to
(24:13):
find out is that somebody else's energy?
Is that somebody else'semotion or is that my emotion?
And I'm telling you, if you do some ofthese practices, support your energy.
And check in with the emotionsand something I didn't spend
any time talking about, but.
Perhaps I'll get to it next time.
But basically the last thing that Iwant, maybe I'll just quickly mention
it, is about when you feel yourselfhooked into somebody else's energy.
(24:38):
Like I said, you can send it backto them, whoever they are, and then
another part you can do is cut cords.
If you can imagine that these, these,cords of energy that are attaching us
to other people and other people will.
Connect to us.
Again, not consciously, but they getconnected that those cords need to be cut.
The only cords that stay intact,that stay throughout our lives are
(25:01):
the cords that are connected toour parents and to our children.
I. And just for those people outthere that are going, oh, but I
wanna be connected to my husband.
I wanna be, have cords to this.
No, you do not because you areprocessing their stuff, their emotions
through those energetic cords.
(25:21):
And people need to be ableto process their own stuff.
And we've got our, each of ushas enough for us to process.
That we don't need to takeon any, anybody else's stuff.
I hope that makes sense.
I know I've kind of just thrownthis in at at the last minute here,
but that's another part of thisenergetic hygiene, is to cut the
cords between us and other people.
(25:41):
And again, you don't evenneed to know who's corded you.
It's not important,it's just the awareness.
So it's something that Imight do automatically.
Once or twice a day, and I just place theintention that I'm, I imagine scissors and
I'm cutting all cords that are attachedto me from other people, and I just cut
and release and clear so that my energyis clear and we can still get corded even
(26:05):
if we've got, if we've got our energy.
Bubble.
that's much more challenging tobecome corded by somebody else.
So what I'll do is I'lljust ask to cut any cords.
I'll cut any cords, cut any cords,and then I'll put my bubble on.
and then again, I kind of check in and Imight just, you know, throw it out there.
It doesn't hurt anything.
And, It can only cut the cords that arenot essential, meaning the ones that
(26:29):
are not connected to your children.
And by the way, even if you don'tcorded to your spouse or your
friends or people, you are still ahundred percent connected to them.
It does not take away fromyour connection to that person.
It's just these chords are kind ofextraneous and they're not necessary.
So I hope that kind of makes sense.
(26:50):
anyway, if you have any desire to do someemotional clearing, do some mentoring with
me, to talk more about individually, howyou can, support your energy, step into
a more authentic version of yourself.
want to clear emotional blocks thatyou are experiencing that perhaps
(27:12):
are slowing down your whole healingprocess, then give me a call.
I would love to talk to you.
I would love to do an, exploration call.
find out.
If there's any way that I can beof service, I use acupuncture, I do
essential oils, there's all kindsof ways that we can address things.
And I'm here to help.
I am here to help.
(27:32):
And so with that, thank you somuch again for your support.
Thanks for joining me today.
I hope that there is something of value.
And until next time, from my heartto yours, sending you lots of love.
I'll see you soon.
IYE Outro (27:48):
Thank you for joining me today on In Your Element.
I hope this conversation has sparkeda new awareness of how you can
align with the natural rhythms ofyour body and the world around you.
If you enjoyed today's episode, be sureto subscribe so you don't miss what's
next and if something resonated with you.
I'd really love to hear from you.
Connect with me atkenneallyacupuncture.com
(28:10):
or on social media.
Until next time, stay balanced,stay inspired, and keep tuning into
the wisdom within and around you.
See you next time on in Your element.
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