March 26, 2025 • 23 mins
Hey, Friend!
Everyone starts a new job wanted to make a good impression. You want those who hired you to know that they made a good hire. So you listen to those eager to tell you all of the things you should change right away.
But don’t be fooled. Although there may be some things that need immediate attention, such as immediately putting child safety measures in place, or filling a spot in a classroom, most change needs to wait until you have laid the foundation.
I am suggesting three priorities you need to have in your first year of ministry, before you begin making changes.
-
Establish Credibility
-
Lead with Curiosity
-
Build Relationships
Each one of these is more relational than task oriented, but will help tremendously as you get others on board with any change that needs to be made.
I pray this blesses you!
Becky
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
In my work with women in ministry, I've heard different iterations of this story too many times to count.
(00:08):
A new minister comes into a role and they've been hired by some kind of search committee or part of the leadership team of that church.
And along with hiring them, they give them some kinds of expectations, not only what they're looking for in a new minister,
but what they expect that minister to accomplish right away.
(00:29):
Very often when a new minister is hired, it's a wonderful opportunity to make some changes perhaps that have needed to have been made for a long time.
Oh good, now you're here, we can do this.
Or now that you've been hired, we can stop doing this other thing or we can change our direction or you can give us new focus or whatever it is that they're told.
(00:51):
And so when a new minister comes into a role, there's a heaviness, there's a feeling of I really want the people that have hired me to feel like they've made a good hire.
So I'm going to come in and I'm going to, I'm going to make my mark.
I am going to live into these expectations they have for me.
I want to make a good impression from the get go.
(01:15):
The problem is there is a big difference between things that we've seen needed to be changed in a particular ministry for some time and now we have someone new who can lead us in that change when the time is right versus we need you to do it now.
Because when it comes to priorities that a new minister should set in their first year of ministry.
(01:42):
In acting, effective change is not one of them. There are, there's groundwork, there's foundational work that a minister must do before they can hope to make any significant or lasting change in their church or in their ministry.
Want to know more? Let's dive in to today's episode.
(02:05):
Hey friend, are you a people pleasing conflict avoiding leader? Is your secret relationship with fear affecting your leadership decisions?
Do you want to learn how to build credibility and confidence or to navigate difficult conversations? Do you long to manage your time without sacrificing your family or self-care?
(02:28):
Welcome to Leadership Becomes Her. I'm Becky Burroughs, your host and a minister and life and leadership coach with over 50 years experience in leadership.
I firmly believe God has given you everything you need to lead well. You have the toolbox. You just need to learn how to use the tools.
So get comfy or start a mindless task. You know how to pause or rewind if you need to. Let's get started.
(02:55):
So because I work with women in ministry in my leadership boot camp, which we do twice a year leadership boot camp for women in ministry and also in my group coaching for women in ministry, which is called Cairo's cohort.
I have the opportunity, actually the blessing of getting in relationship with women in ministry in a variety of roles.
(03:26):
And as a result, I also get phone calls from women that I haven't directly worked with, but who just need some advice or a word of encouragement.
Not too often those calls are from a woman who has gotten a job, a ministry position at a church and within a year to two years has been ineffectively fired because of some mistakes she made in that first year of ministry.
(03:56):
When I hear the story, yeah, sometimes we make rookie mistakes. We get excited and think that we're supposed to come in and make sweeping changes because that's what someone told us when we were hired.
But I think anytime there's a problem at any level of an organization, it can always be traced back to a problem in leadership.
(04:17):
So in the case of a woman who's been fired because she made a lot of changes, for example, I want to go back and talk to the leadership of that church and say, you know, how well did you communicate your expectations and what did you do to set her up for success and who do you assign to mentor her and on and on?
(04:38):
I got a whole series of questions and maybe I'll do an episode on that one day, but I've seen I've heard of women who have been fired because they came in their first year and because they listened to a subset of people and heard their complaints thought that, oh, wow, a lot of people feel this way.
So I'm going to go in and just cancel vacation, Bible school or I'm going to go in and restructure how we do children's church when when kids are pulled out of the worship maybe during the sermon time to have some age appropriate worship or I've seen all kinds of changes being made because a new minister who didn't know any better.
(05:18):
I've heard a lot of people listen to a few very vocal people as to some things that needed to change right away and hear she went about making those sweeping changes without first laying the groundwork.
So in today's episode, I'm going to talk about three things, three priorities that I think you should have in your first year in ministry or in your first year in a different church.
(05:46):
So I'm going to put in any change into place and here they are.
And these are in no particular order because you really need to do these simultaneously.
Here are the three priorities you absolutely must have.
Number one, establishing credibility.
Number two, lead with curiosity and number three, build relationships.
(06:08):
I'm going to start with the third one.
Well now I'm going to start with establishing credibility. As I said, these three work in concert with each other.
You want to establish credibility with not only your fellow staff people with the ministers, with the support staff, but you also want to establish credibility with whatever your leadership structure is at your church, decons, elders.
(06:33):
You want to establish credibility with volunteers that work in your ministry. You want to establish credibility with those you serve.
That means if you are a children's minister, you are working to establish credibility with those families.
If you're a student minister, you're working to establish credibility with those families.
If you are an outreach minister, you are working to establish credibility with the whole church.
(06:57):
And what does it mean to establish credibility?
I've got several podcast episodes specifically talking about credibility, but in a nutshell, it is establishing trust.
When you are seen as a credible leader, others trust your leadership.
Because you have built that credibility. You have earned it.
(07:19):
And it's absolutely critical that you begin establishing that early on as a new minister or as a minister new in a church.
Here's how you do it. Be consistent. Follow through on your commitments. Do what you say you're going to do.
And this applies to both large and small tasks. It applies to coming onto an appointment.
(07:42):
If you say you're going to be there at three, don't get there at 305. Get there at three if not before.
If you say you're going to do something, follow through. Make sure it gets done.
The second thing you can do to establish credibility is be transparent. And this means using open, honest communication because that builds trust.
(08:03):
You want to share your vision, your goals and even challenges with the people in your world.
You want people to see your communication is honest in that. It doesn't have a sarcastic tone.
It doesn't feel passive aggressive. It's not like you're saying one thing and meaning another.
(08:24):
You say what you mean and you mean what you say and your communication is not only transparent. It is also consistent.
Number three, know your stuff. A new minister doesn't need to know everything and you certainly know very little about the church in which you've just been hired.
And so we'll talk about that in a minute, but you want to be well prepared and knowledgeable about how your particular ministry and all use children's ministry as an example, how it's run some important elements of it.
(08:58):
Because it's going to be your job to communicate that to the church.
For example, I had a children's minister say to me recently that it really bothered her that the church did not seem to value intergenerational worship where the kids have a role as well as the adults where maybe you'll have one of the older elementary kids making an announcement or getting up and saying the thing that causes the kids to dismiss to go to kids praise or helping give the communion thoughts.
(09:31):
And what I said to her was you are the children's minister. It is your job to teach the church why that is important.
And so that's kind of what I mean by know your stuff except your role as the expert in children's ministry even if you're brand new, even if you just graduated from college.
You have enough knowledge to get you started so that you can share your vision and your goals with the church. And then you want to embody integrity.
(10:01):
People can tell when you're being authentic versus when you're not.
And so being honest, being humble, being consistent will help you earn credibility with your church family.
And then you want to develop those listening skills take the time to understand the concern, the ideas, even the thoughts of key leaders like elders and deacons and the other ministers and their ministries learn how to listen carefully.
(10:31):
And so that's just as powerful as speaking. I've known many ministers who are comfortable speaking in front of their group whether it's children or students or women or whatever, but you put them up in front of the whole church or you put them up in front of adults and they panic.
I don't know how to talk to adults. And that's a skill and that's a skill you develop by doing it.
(10:52):
But listening is also a skill and you can start right away being an effective listener and actually that's going to build trust in you every bit is fast, if not faster than being a good speaker.
So as you're building credibility with different groups, think about with your elders and your deacons focusing on building trust through respectable collaboration, honoring the traditions and engaging in spiritual leadership discussions.
(11:20):
You want to talk with them on their level. This is a skill that has to be developed. A lot of times we get into, for example, working with children or students because we're very comfortable with that group. We're very comfortable communicating on a kid level.
We have to also get comfortable communicating with people old enough to be our parents or our grandparents. And a lot of that is honest conversation, humility and respect. That will go a long, long way in earning credibility with leadership groups.
(11:54):
And then earning credibility with other ministers is where team dynamics happen. A new minister coming into the group, you are every bit as a minister as those who have been there 15 years or so.
So you want to remove the doubt about, oh, they don't respect me because I'm in my 20s. And I've heard so many ministers say that they don't listen to me because I'm the youngest on staff. And it's just not true.
(12:22):
I mean, there's always going to be that outlier in every group that may not respect others as they should. But in general, ministers recognize that young ministers bring not only fresh eyes, but a fresh perspective and a youth that an energy that only comes with being young.
And so we always get excited when young ministers join the team. And yet a new minister should also be collaborative and supportive and willing to learn from others and willing to offer help when needed.
(12:55):
And you want to earn credibility with your volunteers because they are the backbone of ministry. And so learning how to show appreciation and respect and a willingness to work alongside your volunteers is absolutely key to earning credibility with them.
And so that the congregation is a whole being present, being approachable and showing a genuine care for their spiritual and personal needs helps build credibility with the congregation.
(13:26):
A new minister must also lead with curiosity. Now, why does this matter? Because curiosity drives growth. And when a new minister is leading with curiosity, they're showing a willingness to learn and to adapt.
And so this is absolutely crucial for effective ministry. So how do you lead with curiosity? Well, you ask good questions rather than assuming that you know all the answers, approach any situation with a learning mindset.
(13:55):
And ask open-ended questions. You want to understand the history of the church. How is it that we got to doing this this way and find out who it matters to and learn the needs and the perspectives of the church.
I became the children's minister at our church and we started a campaign at one point to remodel the children's wing. One of the first things I noticed is there are several places in the children's wing that were icons. They were especially decorated by certain members of the church. They had great value and meaning at the time.
(14:30):
But yet they weren't in keeping with the vision that we had for the new look of the children's wing. So out of respect, I had to be curious and go find out who painted this mural. When did they paint it or who commissioned it?
Finding out who it's important to is that person still living is that person still here. Do they still have family here? Finding out that certain things, certain areas are important to people are not a reason not to change them. But they are a reason to move slowly and thoughtfully and lovingly and take the time to meet with those people that it matters to and explain why you're changing it.
(15:13):
That goes a long way to building that trust. Also being humble. Humility is not berating yourself, beating yourself, making self-deprecating remarks. Humility is recognizing that I'm not going to be the smartest person in every room. I am not going to have all the answers.
And certainly if I'm new in a church and I don't fully grasp the culture and the climate of that church, which takes, I would say, a good year to fully understand. Then I'm not going to have all the answers. So leading with curiosity means being humble enough to learn from others and grow along side them.
(15:54):
And then being willing to explore different ministry approaches. I know the way they did it in the church in which you grew up. I know that there was a way they did things in the church that you've worked before, but every congregation is unique.
And so don't be afraid to explore different styles of teaching and worship and community outreach that might resonate the best with the people where you are now.
(16:22):
So let's say you're a children's minister and they have an established children's church where they pull the kids out at some point during worship for age appropriate worship.
You may have loved the way it was done at the church in which you grew up or the church you were working in before. But before you come in and say, I want to change it to this way or I want to change the curriculum or change anything.
(16:46):
And then you may experience it, talk to the people that are doing it, talk to the parents, the kids, the volunteers, find out why they do it the way they do. You may learn that they're doing it that way because they don't have another way.
And they would welcome ideas. Are you may learn that there's a long history of how they got to this point.
And so as you just jump on board for a while as you begin to assess for yourself how it's working because it's going to take time for you to make and that would be considered a sweeping change is going to take time for you to make a sweeping change in that area.
(17:21):
So as you are building credibility as you are leading with curiosity and as you are building relationships it is going to take time because during that time you need to put on your listening hat and you need to listen to the different to the elders to the deacons listen to the other ministers listen to the parents listen to the kids listen to the volunteers and listen to their challenges.
(17:49):
And you would even recommend you spend some time one on one with some key people and ask all of these people the same questions one of the things that I did in wanting to evaluate the children's ministry because I had already been on staff for several years I was just changing positions changing and filling in the gap of the children's ministry role for a few years.
(18:13):
So I met with parents and key volunteers and I asked everybody the same questions what do you like about the children's ministry here at this church what do you think ought to be different and to what degree are you involved or willing to be involved.
Now that question was for me the most important one because if you can't if I met with you and you had all these ideas for things we ought to do differently and then you told me my kiddo doesn't even isn't even involved in children's ministry and no I do not serve I do not volunteer well your comments are not going to carry as much weight with me as a parent or a volunteer who is fully invested.
(18:52):
You need to develop relationships with the elders and the deacons and ask them how you can support them or how you can pray for them.
Meet members of the congregation not just your constituents not just your parents your kids your volunteers but meet the congregation as a whole finding out what their needs are inviting their feedback on church events and programs.
(19:18):
Because it is so important for you to build relationships outside of your ministry because you are always in need of recruiting additional volunteers the only way to do that effectively is to recruit in relationship and so building those relationships which leads me to point number three which is build relationship.
(19:39):
And this matters because ministry is not a solo endeavor ministry is about people it's about relationships first with God and then with others and when you take the time to build relationship that creates the foundation for trust for collaboration and for a deeper sense of community so how do you do that how do you build relationships be present make an effort to be present in the lives of your congregation and this means.
(20:08):
Not only spending time in fellowship before and after church meeting people greeting people talking to them it means visiting those who are sick or attending events outside of the ones that that your ministry provides also be authentic people appreciate it when leaders are real with them so don't be afraid to share your own joys and to be open about your personal walk with God.
(20:36):
Invest in one on one time this is what I mentioned earlier meeting with individuals and with families helps you understand their specific needs and creates an opportunity for deeper connection.
So let's say you plan a years worth of wonderful events within your ministry but you have not taken the time to meet with your families and you don't know that perhaps they've got a custody situation so their kids are only going to be present every other week or maybe you don't know that one of the parents works late on Saturday night so they struggle to get to class much less extra activities.
(21:15):
You don't know the challenges of these particular families because you haven't met with them you don't know if they have financial constraints it's going to keep them for participating in your events where there is a charge or even going to camp if no scholarship is offered and so it's really important that you know your families as you are planning events for them.
(21:38):
And then you want to encourage team building strengthening the bond between church leaders and volunteers by creating a space for collaboration and shared vision and then be a listener.
Be a building relationships involves deep listening just as it involves effective speaking because people need to feel heard and valued.
(22:03):
And so as you are entering into your job in your first year as a new minister or you're a seasoned minister but you have changed churches and now you've got your first year in a new church.
It is so vital that you establish foundational priorities establishing credibility leading with curiosity and building relationships and once you have built a solid foundation for your ministry then you can start dreaming and planning any kind of change that you want to enact and by the way effective change also does not happen in a vacuum.
(22:45):
It is important to put together a team for that as well but we'll talk about that in a later episode.
Hey let's do this again next week.
It is my prayer that this podcast inspired you, blessed you or made you think.
If so please share it with a friend, subscribe and please leave a review.
Hey I want to connect with you follow me on Facebook, Instagram and LinkedIn send me a DM or email me at hello@beckyburroughs.com
(23:14):
If you are a Christian woman who leads and you are interested in one of my Leadership Bootcamps for Women in Ministry this is a four week workshop or becoming part of a Kairos Cohort, your long group coaching send me a DM or an email for more information.
We'll talk soon.
[Music]
(23:44):
(upbeat music)
In my work with women in ministry, I've heard different iterations of this story too many times to count.
(00:08):
A new minister comes into a role and they've been hired by some kind of search committee or part of the leadership team of that church.
And along with hiring them, they give them some kinds of expectations, not only what they're looking for in a new minister,
but what they expect that minister to accomplish right away.
(00:29):
Very often when a new minister is hired, it's a wonderful opportunity to make some changes perhaps that have needed to have been made for a long time.
Oh good, now you're here, we can do this.
Or now that you've been hired, we can stop doing this other thing or we can change our direction or you can give us new focus or whatever it is that they're told.
(00:51):
And so when a new minister comes into a role, there's a heaviness, there's a feeling of I really want the people that have hired me to feel like they've made a good hire.
So I'm going to come in and I'm going to, I'm going to make my mark.
I am going to live into these expectations they have for me.
I want to make a good impression from the get go.
(01:15):
The problem is there is a big difference between things that we've seen needed to be changed in a particular ministry for some time and now we have someone new who can lead us in that change when the time is right versus we need you to do it now.
Because when it comes to priorities that a new minister should set in their first year of ministry.
(01:42):
In acting, effective change is not one of them. There are, there's groundwork, there's foundational work that a minister must do before they can hope to make any significant or lasting change in their church or in their ministry.
Want to know more? Let's dive in to today's episode.
(02:05):
Hey friend, are you a people pleasing conflict avoiding leader? Is your secret relationship with fear affecting your leadership decisions?
Do you want to learn how to build credibility and confidence or to navigate difficult conversations? Do you long to manage your time without sacrificing your family or self-care?
(02:28):
Welcome to Leadership Becomes Her. I'm Becky Burroughs, your host and a minister and life and leadership coach with over 50 years experience in leadership.
I firmly believe God has given you everything you need to lead well. You have the toolbox. You just need to learn how to use the tools.
So get comfy or start a mindless task. You know how to pause or rewind if you need to. Let's get started.
(02:55):
So because I work with women in ministry in my leadership boot camp, which we do twice a year leadership boot camp for women in ministry and also in my group coaching for women in ministry, which is called Cairo's cohort.
I have the opportunity, actually the blessing of getting in relationship with women in ministry in a variety of roles.
(03:26):
And as a result, I also get phone calls from women that I haven't directly worked with, but who just need some advice or a word of encouragement.
Not too often those calls are from a woman who has gotten a job, a ministry position at a church and within a year to two years has been ineffectively fired because of some mistakes she made in that first year of ministry.
(03:56):
When I hear the story, yeah, sometimes we make rookie mistakes. We get excited and think that we're supposed to come in and make sweeping changes because that's what someone told us when we were hired.
But I think anytime there's a problem at any level of an organization, it can always be traced back to a problem in leadership.
(04:17):
So in the case of a woman who's been fired because she made a lot of changes, for example, I want to go back and talk to the leadership of that church and say, you know, how well did you communicate your expectations and what did you do to set her up for success and who do you assign to mentor her and on and on?
(04:38):
I got a whole series of questions and maybe I'll do an episode on that one day, but I've seen I've heard of women who have been fired because they came in their first year and because they listened to a subset of people and heard their complaints thought that, oh, wow, a lot of people feel this way.
So I'm going to go in and just cancel vacation, Bible school or I'm going to go in and restructure how we do children's church when when kids are pulled out of the worship maybe during the sermon time to have some age appropriate worship or I've seen all kinds of changes being made because a new minister who didn't know any better.
(05:18):
I've heard a lot of people listen to a few very vocal people as to some things that needed to change right away and hear she went about making those sweeping changes without first laying the groundwork.
So in today's episode, I'm going to talk about three things, three priorities that I think you should have in your first year in ministry or in your first year in a different church.
(05:46):
So I'm going to put in any change into place and here they are.
And these are in no particular order because you really need to do these simultaneously.
Here are the three priorities you absolutely must have.
Number one, establishing credibility.
Number two, lead with curiosity and number three, build relationships.
(06:08):
I'm going to start with the third one.
Well now I'm going to start with establishing credibility. As I said, these three work in concert with each other.
You want to establish credibility with not only your fellow staff people with the ministers, with the support staff, but you also want to establish credibility with whatever your leadership structure is at your church, decons, elders.
(06:33):
You want to establish credibility with volunteers that work in your ministry. You want to establish credibility with those you serve.
That means if you are a children's minister, you are working to establish credibility with those families.
If you're a student minister, you're working to establish credibility with those families.
If you are an outreach minister, you are working to establish credibility with the whole church.
(06:57):
And what does it mean to establish credibility?
I've got several podcast episodes specifically talking about credibility, but in a nutshell, it is establishing trust.
When you are seen as a credible leader, others trust your leadership.
Because you have built that credibility. You have earned it.
(07:19):
And it's absolutely critical that you begin establishing that early on as a new minister or as a minister new in a church.
Here's how you do it. Be consistent. Follow through on your commitments. Do what you say you're going to do.
And this applies to both large and small tasks. It applies to coming onto an appointment.
(07:42):
If you say you're going to be there at three, don't get there at 305. Get there at three if not before.
If you say you're going to do something, follow through. Make sure it gets done.
The second thing you can do to establish credibility is be transparent. And this means using open, honest communication because that builds trust.
(08:03):
You want to share your vision, your goals and even challenges with the people in your world.
You want people to see your communication is honest in that. It doesn't have a sarcastic tone.
It doesn't feel passive aggressive. It's not like you're saying one thing and meaning another.
(08:24):
You say what you mean and you mean what you say and your communication is not only transparent. It is also consistent.
Number three, know your stuff. A new minister doesn't need to know everything and you certainly know very little about the church in which you've just been hired.
And so we'll talk about that in a minute, but you want to be well prepared and knowledgeable about how your particular ministry and all use children's ministry as an example, how it's run some important elements of it.
(08:58):
Because it's going to be your job to communicate that to the church.
For example, I had a children's minister say to me recently that it really bothered her that the church did not seem to value intergenerational worship where the kids have a role as well as the adults where maybe you'll have one of the older elementary kids making an announcement or getting up and saying the thing that causes the kids to dismiss to go to kids praise or helping give the communion thoughts.
(09:31):
And what I said to her was you are the children's minister. It is your job to teach the church why that is important.
And so that's kind of what I mean by know your stuff except your role as the expert in children's ministry even if you're brand new, even if you just graduated from college.
You have enough knowledge to get you started so that you can share your vision and your goals with the church. And then you want to embody integrity.
(10:01):
People can tell when you're being authentic versus when you're not.
And so being honest, being humble, being consistent will help you earn credibility with your church family.
And then you want to develop those listening skills take the time to understand the concern, the ideas, even the thoughts of key leaders like elders and deacons and the other ministers and their ministries learn how to listen carefully.
(10:31):
And so that's just as powerful as speaking. I've known many ministers who are comfortable speaking in front of their group whether it's children or students or women or whatever, but you put them up in front of the whole church or you put them up in front of adults and they panic.
I don't know how to talk to adults. And that's a skill and that's a skill you develop by doing it.
(10:52):
But listening is also a skill and you can start right away being an effective listener and actually that's going to build trust in you every bit is fast, if not faster than being a good speaker.
So as you're building credibility with different groups, think about with your elders and your deacons focusing on building trust through respectable collaboration, honoring the traditions and engaging in spiritual leadership discussions.
(11:20):
You want to talk with them on their level. This is a skill that has to be developed. A lot of times we get into, for example, working with children or students because we're very comfortable with that group. We're very comfortable communicating on a kid level.
We have to also get comfortable communicating with people old enough to be our parents or our grandparents. And a lot of that is honest conversation, humility and respect. That will go a long, long way in earning credibility with leadership groups.
(11:54):
And then earning credibility with other ministers is where team dynamics happen. A new minister coming into the group, you are every bit as a minister as those who have been there 15 years or so.
So you want to remove the doubt about, oh, they don't respect me because I'm in my 20s. And I've heard so many ministers say that they don't listen to me because I'm the youngest on staff. And it's just not true.
(12:22):
I mean, there's always going to be that outlier in every group that may not respect others as they should. But in general, ministers recognize that young ministers bring not only fresh eyes, but a fresh perspective and a youth that an energy that only comes with being young.
And so we always get excited when young ministers join the team. And yet a new minister should also be collaborative and supportive and willing to learn from others and willing to offer help when needed.
(12:55):
And you want to earn credibility with your volunteers because they are the backbone of ministry. And so learning how to show appreciation and respect and a willingness to work alongside your volunteers is absolutely key to earning credibility with them.
And so that the congregation is a whole being present, being approachable and showing a genuine care for their spiritual and personal needs helps build credibility with the congregation.
(13:26):
A new minister must also lead with curiosity. Now, why does this matter? Because curiosity drives growth. And when a new minister is leading with curiosity, they're showing a willingness to learn and to adapt.
And so this is absolutely crucial for effective ministry. So how do you lead with curiosity? Well, you ask good questions rather than assuming that you know all the answers, approach any situation with a learning mindset.
(13:55):
And ask open-ended questions. You want to understand the history of the church. How is it that we got to doing this this way and find out who it matters to and learn the needs and the perspectives of the church.
I became the children's minister at our church and we started a campaign at one point to remodel the children's wing. One of the first things I noticed is there are several places in the children's wing that were icons. They were especially decorated by certain members of the church. They had great value and meaning at the time.
(14:30):
But yet they weren't in keeping with the vision that we had for the new look of the children's wing. So out of respect, I had to be curious and go find out who painted this mural. When did they paint it or who commissioned it?
Finding out who it's important to is that person still living is that person still here. Do they still have family here? Finding out that certain things, certain areas are important to people are not a reason not to change them. But they are a reason to move slowly and thoughtfully and lovingly and take the time to meet with those people that it matters to and explain why you're changing it.
(15:13):
That goes a long way to building that trust. Also being humble. Humility is not berating yourself, beating yourself, making self-deprecating remarks. Humility is recognizing that I'm not going to be the smartest person in every room. I am not going to have all the answers.
And certainly if I'm new in a church and I don't fully grasp the culture and the climate of that church, which takes, I would say, a good year to fully understand. Then I'm not going to have all the answers. So leading with curiosity means being humble enough to learn from others and grow along side them.
(15:54):
And then being willing to explore different ministry approaches. I know the way they did it in the church in which you grew up. I know that there was a way they did things in the church that you've worked before, but every congregation is unique.
And so don't be afraid to explore different styles of teaching and worship and community outreach that might resonate the best with the people where you are now.
(16:22):
So let's say you're a children's minister and they have an established children's church where they pull the kids out at some point during worship for age appropriate worship.
You may have loved the way it was done at the church in which you grew up or the church you were working in before. But before you come in and say, I want to change it to this way or I want to change the curriculum or change anything.
(16:46):
And then you may experience it, talk to the people that are doing it, talk to the parents, the kids, the volunteers, find out why they do it the way they do. You may learn that they're doing it that way because they don't have another way.
And they would welcome ideas. Are you may learn that there's a long history of how they got to this point.
And so as you just jump on board for a while as you begin to assess for yourself how it's working because it's going to take time for you to make and that would be considered a sweeping change is going to take time for you to make a sweeping change in that area.
(17:21):
So as you are building credibility as you are leading with curiosity and as you are building relationships it is going to take time because during that time you need to put on your listening hat and you need to listen to the different to the elders to the deacons listen to the other ministers listen to the parents listen to the kids listen to the volunteers and listen to their challenges.
(17:49):
And you would even recommend you spend some time one on one with some key people and ask all of these people the same questions one of the things that I did in wanting to evaluate the children's ministry because I had already been on staff for several years I was just changing positions changing and filling in the gap of the children's ministry role for a few years.
(18:13):
So I met with parents and key volunteers and I asked everybody the same questions what do you like about the children's ministry here at this church what do you think ought to be different and to what degree are you involved or willing to be involved.
Now that question was for me the most important one because if you can't if I met with you and you had all these ideas for things we ought to do differently and then you told me my kiddo doesn't even isn't even involved in children's ministry and no I do not serve I do not volunteer well your comments are not going to carry as much weight with me as a parent or a volunteer who is fully invested.
(18:52):
You need to develop relationships with the elders and the deacons and ask them how you can support them or how you can pray for them.
Meet members of the congregation not just your constituents not just your parents your kids your volunteers but meet the congregation as a whole finding out what their needs are inviting their feedback on church events and programs.
(19:18):
Because it is so important for you to build relationships outside of your ministry because you are always in need of recruiting additional volunteers the only way to do that effectively is to recruit in relationship and so building those relationships which leads me to point number three which is build relationship.
(19:39):
And this matters because ministry is not a solo endeavor ministry is about people it's about relationships first with God and then with others and when you take the time to build relationship that creates the foundation for trust for collaboration and for a deeper sense of community so how do you do that how do you build relationships be present make an effort to be present in the lives of your congregation and this means.
(20:08):
Not only spending time in fellowship before and after church meeting people greeting people talking to them it means visiting those who are sick or attending events outside of the ones that that your ministry provides also be authentic people appreciate it when leaders are real with them so don't be afraid to share your own joys and to be open about your personal walk with God.
(20:36):
Invest in one on one time this is what I mentioned earlier meeting with individuals and with families helps you understand their specific needs and creates an opportunity for deeper connection.
So let's say you plan a years worth of wonderful events within your ministry but you have not taken the time to meet with your families and you don't know that perhaps they've got a custody situation so their kids are only going to be present every other week or maybe you don't know that one of the parents works late on Saturday night so they struggle to get to class much less extra activities.
(21:15):
You don't know the challenges of these particular families because you haven't met with them you don't know if they have financial constraints it's going to keep them for participating in your events where there is a charge or even going to camp if no scholarship is offered and so it's really important that you know your families as you are planning events for them.
(21:38):
And then you want to encourage team building strengthening the bond between church leaders and volunteers by creating a space for collaboration and shared vision and then be a listener.
Be a building relationships involves deep listening just as it involves effective speaking because people need to feel heard and valued.
(22:03):
And so as you are entering into your job in your first year as a new minister or you're a seasoned minister but you have changed churches and now you've got your first year in a new church.
It is so vital that you establish foundational priorities establishing credibility leading with curiosity and building relationships and once you have built a solid foundation for your ministry then you can start dreaming and planning any kind of change that you want to enact and by the way effective change also does not happen in a vacuum.
(22:45):
It is important to put together a team for that as well but we'll talk about that in a later episode.
Hey let's do this again next week.
It is my prayer that this podcast inspired you, blessed you or made you think.
If so please share it with a friend, subscribe and please leave a review.
Hey I want to connect with you follow me on Facebook, Instagram and LinkedIn send me a DM or email me at hello@beckyburroughs.com
(23:14):
If you are a Christian woman who leads and you are interested in one of my Leadership Bootcamps for Women in Ministry this is a four week workshop or becoming part of a Kairos Cohort, your long group coaching send me a DM or an email for more information.
We'll talk soon.
[Music]
(23:44):
(upbeat music)
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