July 4, 2025 • 8 mins
In this episode of Planet Phoenix, I explore the themes of desire, detachment, and the importance of inviting fun into my life. I discuss the process of detachment, emphasizing the need for compassion and patience as I navigate my ego's desires. I also share my passion for nature and hiking, highlighting how these activities of joy and fulfillment are representative of my true-self.
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Email | matt@planetphoenix.co Blog | https://www.planetphoenix.co/blog
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
Welcome back to Planet Phoenix.
I'm your host, Matt, and I'm grateful that you've joined me here today.
So this week, I have felt a few themes come up in my life, specifically around desire,detachment, and inviting fun.
what I mean by desire is a physical desire, an intellectual desire, an emotional desire,and or a spiritual desire.
(00:24):
And that desire is based on my perception of my egoic needs, So a simple example would bethe revisited energy drink conversation that I started in my last episode.
I've been focusing on releasing.
the energy drink vice or comfort from my life because my body is telling me we don't needit anymore and it doesn't do any good.
(00:48):
just yesterday I caved and I had one and what happened?
for the rest of the day, really felt sluggish and slow and not good.
I felt this desire to purchase one and then this justification at my mind level to getone.
in the past, when I would trip up on moments like this, I would really beat myself up.
And now I accept and I'm compassionate to the choice that I made.
(01:13):
and that I'm an adult and I can make this choice.
But ultimately it left me in a place thinking about desire.
And this time around the relationship to desire is a lot different.
It's not just me thinking about desire and acting on it.
It's me feeling desire, thinking about the desire and then taking action.
(01:35):
that additional step of feeling and thinking is allowing me to understand the separationbetween my actual true self's desire versus my ego's desire.
with this energy drink, it allowed me to feel that out a little bit more.
And today, for instance, I haven't had an energy drink and I feel much lighter.
(01:58):
I feel more at peace with embracing the change and not allowing the desire that I'm usedto, that I'm comfortable with to really take over and dictate my actions.
desire is not limited to just food, right?
It's also physical or sexual, intellectual, emotional.
(02:19):
So emotional can be for me a desire of external validation.
sexual desire, which is a very sensitive topic for obvious reasons, but it is part of whowe are as a human.
I found myself also exploring that aspect of desire this week too.
And
understanding my...
physical attraction to people, but not allowing it to be my primary way of interpreting orobserving their existence.
(02:47):
for instance, if I see an attractive woman walking down the block, do I focus on herphysical attributes or that she's simply a human walking down the block
I could understand if some people are listening to this and like, dude, what are youthinking?
But I will say that growing up in our civilization is we're so driven by physical pleasurethat it's very easy to skew the world around us because of how much sex is put in front of
(03:19):
us.
So deconstructing that desire
it's taking time and it's going to continue to take time.
I have to, like I did with the energy drink, be compassionate.
this compassion is allowing me to be patient with myself.
This compassion and patience then allows me to move into detachment.
So when I can feel these desires arise, I can feel them, I can think about them, and thenI can begin to detach from them.
(03:47):
and determine, okay, is this something that I'm used to having a desire for?
Or is there some kind of spiritual desire that's aligned with my true self that isattracting me towards this group, this person, this product, whatever it may be.
And more often than not, for me at least, it's really my ego trying to take the driver'sseat and just take the car of my body.
(04:10):
into the direction that allows it to have the comforts that it's used to as well as whichit desires.
But detachment is a process, it's a very delicate process.
And I have wanted detachment to be just simply like a switch
it's not that simple.
I'm not saying that to deter anyone from doing the work of detachment.
(04:31):
I'm saying it to allow compassion to come in to your process because it's gonna take timeand it requires a single pointed focus in deconstructing the desires from our ego.
What I've done with detachment is practice a lot more meditation.
And when the thoughts arise of desire of various types, I try to picture myself in like abubble almost, and the desires are outside the bubble, but they can't get in.
(05:03):
There's no way that the desires can get in, but they're there.
They're not going to just simply.
shut off and turn away and decide to go somewhere else.
They're part of my existence, but they don't define who I am at my heart level.
as I continue in meditation to detach from these thoughts, habits, belief systems that allcan kind of have the foundation of some form of desire, they become much more quiet.
(05:28):
And that allows me to go deeper into the meditation.
And sometimes a desire or a thought will come up that is trying to tell me something, thatthere's something I need to learn from that specific desire
The more that I work on detachment, the more I feel myself inviting other aspects of lifeinto my existence.
(05:53):
for instance, I really have been thinking about hiking again.
Back in 2013, I'd just gotten sober from alcohol.
And I went straight to the Catskills here in New York and I was there at least one day aweek and it would be a four hour hike or a six hour hike.
then there were some days that I would drive all the way up there, hike come back downthen go right back up the next day and do another hike.
(06:20):
I just immersed myself into nature.
And unknowingly at the time it felt so good because
I allowed myself to detach from my addiction of alcohol and there was this supplement ofnature that was being invited into my life.
it became such a passion of mine where I started to bring colleagues from my offices up tovarious places here in New York so that they could get out of the office and enjoy a
(06:46):
little bit of nature.
it became just this.
wonderful passion so by having this week include a number of desires that have come intomy being I've Traveled to detachment and that detachment Has further allowed me to be open
to bring in fun to bring in love to bring in laughter and innocence and just realize the
(07:09):
the power of nature as well as what I'm passionate about.
it's been a very productive week.
I've had to be very honest with myself.
I've had to allow myself to fall.
I would say it wasn't even a fall, it was more of a trip.
I simply just
staggered along, got back up and went right back into the pace of my path.
I'm ready to have fun.
(07:30):
my current plan is to get back on the mountain in the next week or two.
I got everything I need from an equipment standpoint, which is great.
it's simply just getting on the mountain and going up seeing where that takes me.
the best part about going into any high
hike is I don't know really what's going to happen, although I know it's going to becompletely great.
(07:51):
I've never had a hike where I've been like, oh, I feel awful afterwards.
Not one.
I've even sprained my ankle on a hike and I got off the mountain and was like, yeah, Istill feel great about this.
So I really look forward to inviting that fun aspect of my life and my passions back intomy life.
(08:12):
I thank you for listening.
And if you have any questions or you'd like to reach out to me, or you'd like to see theother social media platforms that Planet Phoenix is available on, please go to
planetphoenix.co.
Thank you for your time and enjoy your present moment.
Welcome back to Planet Phoenix.
I'm your host, Matt, and I'm grateful that you've joined me here today.
So this week, I have felt a few themes come up in my life, specifically around desire,detachment, and inviting fun.
what I mean by desire is a physical desire, an intellectual desire, an emotional desire,and or a spiritual desire.
(00:24):
And that desire is based on my perception of my egoic needs, So a simple example would bethe revisited energy drink conversation that I started in my last episode.
I've been focusing on releasing.
the energy drink vice or comfort from my life because my body is telling me we don't needit anymore and it doesn't do any good.
(00:48):
just yesterday I caved and I had one and what happened?
for the rest of the day, really felt sluggish and slow and not good.
I felt this desire to purchase one and then this justification at my mind level to getone.
in the past, when I would trip up on moments like this, I would really beat myself up.
And now I accept and I'm compassionate to the choice that I made.
(01:13):
and that I'm an adult and I can make this choice.
But ultimately it left me in a place thinking about desire.
And this time around the relationship to desire is a lot different.
It's not just me thinking about desire and acting on it.
It's me feeling desire, thinking about the desire and then taking action.
(01:35):
that additional step of feeling and thinking is allowing me to understand the separationbetween my actual true self's desire versus my ego's desire.
with this energy drink, it allowed me to feel that out a little bit more.
And today, for instance, I haven't had an energy drink and I feel much lighter.
(01:58):
I feel more at peace with embracing the change and not allowing the desire that I'm usedto, that I'm comfortable with to really take over and dictate my actions.
desire is not limited to just food, right?
It's also physical or sexual, intellectual, emotional.
(02:19):
So emotional can be for me a desire of external validation.
sexual desire, which is a very sensitive topic for obvious reasons, but it is part of whowe are as a human.
I found myself also exploring that aspect of desire this week too.
And
understanding my...
physical attraction to people, but not allowing it to be my primary way of interpreting orobserving their existence.
(02:47):
for instance, if I see an attractive woman walking down the block, do I focus on herphysical attributes or that she's simply a human walking down the block
I could understand if some people are listening to this and like, dude, what are youthinking?
But I will say that growing up in our civilization is we're so driven by physical pleasurethat it's very easy to skew the world around us because of how much sex is put in front of
(03:19):
us.
So deconstructing that desire
it's taking time and it's going to continue to take time.
I have to, like I did with the energy drink, be compassionate.
this compassion is allowing me to be patient with myself.
This compassion and patience then allows me to move into detachment.
So when I can feel these desires arise, I can feel them, I can think about them, and thenI can begin to detach from them.
(03:47):
and determine, okay, is this something that I'm used to having a desire for?
Or is there some kind of spiritual desire that's aligned with my true self that isattracting me towards this group, this person, this product, whatever it may be.
And more often than not, for me at least, it's really my ego trying to take the driver'sseat and just take the car of my body.
(04:10):
into the direction that allows it to have the comforts that it's used to as well as whichit desires.
But detachment is a process, it's a very delicate process.
And I have wanted detachment to be just simply like a switch
it's not that simple.
I'm not saying that to deter anyone from doing the work of detachment.
(04:31):
I'm saying it to allow compassion to come in to your process because it's gonna take timeand it requires a single pointed focus in deconstructing the desires from our ego.
What I've done with detachment is practice a lot more meditation.
And when the thoughts arise of desire of various types, I try to picture myself in like abubble almost, and the desires are outside the bubble, but they can't get in.
(05:03):
There's no way that the desires can get in, but they're there.
They're not going to just simply.
shut off and turn away and decide to go somewhere else.
They're part of my existence, but they don't define who I am at my heart level.
as I continue in meditation to detach from these thoughts, habits, belief systems that allcan kind of have the foundation of some form of desire, they become much more quiet.
(05:28):
And that allows me to go deeper into the meditation.
And sometimes a desire or a thought will come up that is trying to tell me something, thatthere's something I need to learn from that specific desire
The more that I work on detachment, the more I feel myself inviting other aspects of lifeinto my existence.
(05:53):
for instance, I really have been thinking about hiking again.
Back in 2013, I'd just gotten sober from alcohol.
And I went straight to the Catskills here in New York and I was there at least one day aweek and it would be a four hour hike or a six hour hike.
then there were some days that I would drive all the way up there, hike come back downthen go right back up the next day and do another hike.
(06:20):
I just immersed myself into nature.
And unknowingly at the time it felt so good because
I allowed myself to detach from my addiction of alcohol and there was this supplement ofnature that was being invited into my life.
it became such a passion of mine where I started to bring colleagues from my offices up tovarious places here in New York so that they could get out of the office and enjoy a
(06:46):
little bit of nature.
it became just this.
wonderful passion so by having this week include a number of desires that have come intomy being I've Traveled to detachment and that detachment Has further allowed me to be open
to bring in fun to bring in love to bring in laughter and innocence and just realize the
(07:09):
the power of nature as well as what I'm passionate about.
it's been a very productive week.
I've had to be very honest with myself.
I've had to allow myself to fall.
I would say it wasn't even a fall, it was more of a trip.
I simply just
staggered along, got back up and went right back into the pace of my path.
I'm ready to have fun.
(07:30):
my current plan is to get back on the mountain in the next week or two.
I got everything I need from an equipment standpoint, which is great.
it's simply just getting on the mountain and going up seeing where that takes me.
the best part about going into any high
hike is I don't know really what's going to happen, although I know it's going to becompletely great.
(07:51):
I've never had a hike where I've been like, oh, I feel awful afterwards.
Not one.
I've even sprained my ankle on a hike and I got off the mountain and was like, yeah, Istill feel great about this.
So I really look forward to inviting that fun aspect of my life and my passions back intomy life.
(08:12):
I thank you for listening.
And if you have any questions or you'd like to reach out to me, or you'd like to see theother social media platforms that Planet Phoenix is available on, please go to
planetphoenix.co.
Thank you for your time and enjoy your present moment.
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