EP19: Are You in an Unhealthy Relationship?

In this episode of Relational Lives, Ali and Ros explore a vital question: "Am I in an unhealthy relationship?" Whether it's a romantic relationship, friendship, or even a business partnership, this conversation helps you identify the subtle yet damaging signs of unhealthy dynamics. From emotional disconnection and conflict avoidance to people-pleasing and shutdown behaviours, Ali and Ros unpack what these patterns mean and how to begin addressing them. Drawing from emotionally focused therapy, this episode offers practical examples and three takeaway tips to help you reflect on your relationships and take meaningful steps toward repair. If you’ve ever wondered whether your relationship dynamics are helping or harming you, this is a must-watch conversation. Shownotes: Epiosde: Am I in an Unhealthy Relationship? In this episode: 00:00 - Intro 01:05 - Why talk about unhealthy relationships? 02:30 - What's the difference between unhealthy and toxic relationships? 04:00 - Signs of unhealthy relationships 05:15 - Sign #1: Not being able to calmly discuss difficulties 07:40 - Sign #2: No repair after conflict 10:00 - Sign #3: People-pleasing & ignoring your own needs 12:45 - Sign #4: Shutting down or stonewalling 15:10 - Sign #5: Indifference or unintentional neglect 17:30 - Sign #6: The negative cycle explained 21:15 - Sign #7: Lack of trust or emotional safety 24:00 - Understanding what you bring into relationships 26:00 - How to start repairing unhealthy dynamics 29:00 - Sharing the episode as a starting point for discussion 30:00 - Resources to help without therapy 31:10 - 3 Takeaway Tips (incl. journaling prompt) 📍 Resources mentioned: 'Hold Me Tight' by Dr. Sue Johnson (book + online course0 Still Face Experiment by Dr. Edward Tronick Understanding attachment styles: https://www.podbean.com/eas/pb-xwpd3-186c726 The fearful avoidant attachment style: https://www.podbean.com/eas/pb-npv9y-18e4e79 Healthy relationships: https://www.podbean.com/eas/pb-3suv8-188c4bd Connect with us: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/relational_lives Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/relationallives/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@relational_lives YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@Relational_Lives LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/tempo-psychotherapy-services-33a00318/ Want to share your story or come on the show to discuss your dilemma? Write to us and we might cover it in a future episode. Drop us a message at [e-mail] or you can anonymously complete our form here: https://forms.office.com/e/qcrCkbhPiT. We’d also love to hear updates if you’ve written in before. Subscribe for future episodes on trauma, attachment and more mental health topics. If you found this episode helpful, please like this video or share it with a friend. Disclaimer: Please remember, this is not meant to be a replacement for personal therapy and is for information and self-reflection only. Please reach out to an appropriate professional in your area if you feel you need individualised help. Credits: Music by: Stile Tree Studio Produced by: Synergy Podcast Studio