Ep 24 - Antoine Vaillant

In this episode, we sit down with Antoine Vaillant, a bodybuilder, entrepreneur, and popular social media personality whose approach to life goes far beyond the gym. Antoine opens up about the mental side of fitness, what it means to push your limits, and how bodybuilding became both a passion and a path to personal growth.

 

He also shares the real challenges behind competition prep, his philosophy on suffering, and why many people get lost in the pursuit of validation. Whether you're into lifting, mindset, or simply understanding what drives people to become the best version of themselves, this episode offers something honest and real.

 

Topics Discussed in This Episode

– Antoine’s journey through bodybuilding and competition

– The mindset needed to build physical and mental strength

– Learning from suffering and struggle

– The trap of chasing validation through aesthetics

– Daily routines and how they shape identity

– Finding deeper meaning through fitness

– How Antoine uses pain as a tool for growth

 

This episode was sponsored by Matthew Stevenson Insurance.

Website: https://matthew-stevenson.ca/#work

Episode Transcript

(00:03):
This episode of Shit My Dad Taught Me is brought to you by
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he's a strategist. He works alongside your

(00:25):
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Period. If you're ready to stop paying
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You can visit him at matthew-stevenson.ca.

(00:47):
Shoot him Adm. We're going to tag him on this
episode. Tell him Chris and Jamie sent
you. Thanks, Matt.
Rock'n'roll time shit my dad taught me.
My dad taught me. Welcome man.
Thanks. Thanks for coming in today.
We got, we got AVIP in the housetoday.
We got and Antoine Vayant in thehouse today.
The VIP they're. VIP.
So why am I important and? Well, you're a big deal, man.
Let's come on. Thank you for asking in a.

(01:10):
Literal sense as well. You're a big deal.
No, because he said he doesn't know me, that he calls me a VIP.
Yeah. Bro ChatGPT.
Yeah, we. We start off the show with a
little ChatGPT introduction, so.I'll start right now.
I love chats if he's right. Let's see, Antoine Vayant is a
powerhouse in the bodybuilding world, a former rugby and
martial arts kid from Montreal. No rugby.

(01:30):
Oh, word check. I don't know.
I didn't play rugby. I play.
I played football for one year, hockey for 9 when I was a kid.
OK, no rugby. It was sports background or just
right into bodybuilding. I did that and then I went to
bodybuilding because I just wanted to do that.
OK, so it got a little bit. So there you go.
Yeah, ChatGPT if you're listening.

(01:50):
And then by the age of 16, he was hooked on resistance
training and by 2012 had turned pro after sweeping the Canadian
nationals. Yeah, that's true.
OK. Yeah, yeah, yeah, man, talk
about that. Yeah.
Oh, you want me to talk about that?
Yeah. Well, when I was 16, I actually
did my first show and I started training the year prior.

(02:11):
That's why I so it's funny because some people they go to
the gym, they train and then they talk to people to compete,
then they start competing. I joined the gym to compete.
I told the guy and I never trained the gym before.
I said I want to compete in bodybuilding.
And the guy was like, all right,well here's a three day weight
training program you can do. And I would do it like 3 days on
one day off just like twice a week.

(02:31):
I would just keep keep going everyday.
I was like 15,003 and I was rollerblading to the gym.
If I didn't have a ride, I was doing everything I could to get
there. And I'm, I really like the fact
that it was like kind of a solo sport.
And whatever result I'm going toget, I'm the only factor in
those results. Like a team sport, you can suck
and still win or you can do yourbest and still lose because it's

(02:53):
a team sport, right? But I like the fact that it was
like just me and myself and my own thoughts by myself.
It's like a 24/7 kind of sport you're doing.
So I like the challenge and I want it to look like Rambo
Arnold. You know, as a kid you want to
that's like the father figures Ihad, I guess.
And so I was like, oh, you can'tto look like that and to look

(03:15):
all like all the guys. I was looking like like in the
magazines, but like it was bodybuilding.com back then.
You could just go there and see all the bodybuilders and images
on the message boards. I was like, oh, I have to do
more than just push ups and curls at home.
I have to join a gym. So I told my mom, Mom, can I
join this gym? And she paid me like a three
months membership. Like I said, went there, told

(03:35):
the guy I want to compete in bodybuilding and I never trained
in the gym before. And then a year later, I did my
first show and I trained myself.How much did you weigh when you
started at like 15? 16 I was like, I think I was 153
when I first started at like 5-10 and then I did my first
show at 175 a year later. And then every year I kept

(03:59):
getting bigger and cutting bigger and cutting and just
improving, you know? Yeah, yeah, yeah.
But I was like 153. But I was like, kind of like
ripped already, you know, because of all the the
activities I was doing. And I was trying to still eat
well, kind of, you know, and when you're young and you're and
you move and you're a teenager, usually you kind of lose all
your fat anyway. So I was in good shape already.

(04:22):
Then I started eating like a bodybuilder and I gained, I
think in my first first few months of training, I gained
like 30 lbs real quick. I went up to 185 and I was like,
not even like 16. So I was like, oh, you know
what, if you do, if you're a kid, imagine that you're a kid.
You try something and then you become good at it really quick
and people comment, comment on you like that.

(04:44):
Your brains will be like, oh, this is awesome it.
Boosts your ego. You just want to keep doing.
It so yeah, subconsciously I want to keep doing it for that
reason too, but I also enjoy thetrading part and pushing myself.
But for sure the the validation I got from it probably like made
me go towards that a lot. Because three months of somebody
focusing on like, puck handling skills, they're not suddenly
going to be really good. There's nothing in the world

(05:06):
right now could do for three months and become, like, as
good, really, really good at it.Yeah.
You know, unless you put hours every day.
But it's like, yeah. So like when you're a kid, it's
like, this could happen. It flipped quick.
You just got to. I think every teenager probably
has this one thing they could be, like, really, really good
at. They just need to like stumble
upon it, try different shit, or sometimes they love something

(05:27):
they're not genetically made for.
Like if you're 58, you want to be in the NBA, you better
dribble fast or something because you know you'll have
this advantage, right? But if you're a kid that's like
6-8 and you love basketball, good.
But if you love like horse riding, you can't be a good
jockey at like 6-8, You know, it's like AI got lucky that I, I

(05:48):
fell in love to a sport where genetically I was like already
good at, you know, the potentialwas there.
That's awesome, yeah. Yeah, and go back to being a
kid, man. So, Montreal, what was it like
growing up? I mean, I was born in Shelbrook,
which is like 2 hours east Of Montreal, but I always say
Montreal because it's easier to like people to understand where
it is. And I mean, my parent got
divorced at 9. I don't remember a lot before

(06:10):
that. And then that was very like kind
of a turning point. I feel like sometimes my life
started there instead of like when I was born.
I feel like when the divorce is like when I really like my life
started, which is kind of weird when you you think about it.
But yeah, I mean, my mom, I was with my mom and then my dad had

(06:32):
alcohol problems, alcoholic, right?
So he was like did his best. But The thing is at 20 years old
and you're an alcoholic and you have a kid, it's like, and you
don't have any recovery. It's like a it's a bad hand of
cards, you know? So, so at first I don't
understand, but now, no, I I didfor the different reasons.
But yeah. So there was like back and

(06:53):
forth. My mom was the one who raised me
pretty much starting from like 1213 years old.
As a teenager, I was with my mommost of the time.
So yeah. But other than that, I mean,
sports, hockey, I didn't have a a lot of friends.
I find like when I was a teenager, especially like my
friends were because my mom would work in high school that I

(07:16):
would go and it was 2 minutes from my house.
So I would just during lunchtime, I was just jog back,
try to beat my time everyday, you know, jog back.
And then I would go online and Iwould talk with my friends
online. So I would make friends online
in 2000, 2003, all that stuff that I would rather do that than
just talk to people in, in real life.
I finally, sometimes it was like, I don't know, it's like I

(07:39):
didn't want to. I was more shy when I was a kid
and. You could be a different person
at that point. Yeah, no, it's just it's easier
and you all have the same interest because you're going
into like a specific website andto talk about like martial arts
training, all that stuff. So I didn't really relate to
anybody at school. I guess that's what it was like.
All these kids just like doing other cool school stuff, like I

(08:02):
didn't go to prom. I didn't even try to go.
I just went home and I just whatever, I think I'd probably
train or something that day. So yeah, I was just a little bit
different than the, the average teenager in that sense.
But there's so many teenagers that are different.
That's kind of like the norm fora teenager also to be different.
It's normal to be different because you're trying to find
yourself at that time, right? So I think I find myself with

(08:24):
like, oh, I'm going to do this martial arts stuff.
And then I, I, I went through tobodybuilding and this is what I
wanted to do. So yeah.
Yeah. How's things with the parents
today? Like, how's your dad?
Is he? Oh.
My he's good. No, no, he's good I, I text him
like we we text every day for bouts.
He says good morning. I sent him a picture of his
grandson and then that's it. So but it's good.

(08:48):
It's the best, the best friendship I have with him, I
find is right now, it's because you know, if you hold on to
things too much and then you're you're holding on to the past,
you have resentment. You're just going to, you know,
you're going to mess up the moment right now.
I, I know you'll probably talk about it, but like, do you find
that because you kind of went through some struggles and you
kind of can relate to like how the situation he might have been

(09:10):
back in that it's, it's help now?
No, for sure I understood right away.
If you're powerless over drugs and alcohol, there's no way you
can win that fight. So the only way you beat it is
just surrender and then you accept outside help and you got
to find like a healing in a spiritual program or whatever it
is that works for you. So my dad is like 20 years old.

(09:32):
He probably didn't have a lot ofsupport like like, like maybe
like I did. And maybe at 20 years old, I
wasn't ready to stop partying. I was starting, you know what I
mean? But if I had a son back then, I
would like to think I would havenot.
I would have stopped everything and be there for him.
Or would I have I stopped for like a a year and then be

(09:53):
justified just one weekend And me was never one weekend.
So who knows, right? I probably would have not been
as a good of a father or president at least as right now,
you know, because I just had my baby eight months ago.
Now it's like, it's awesome because I'm like, oh wow, I can
give him everything that I didn't have.
Yeah, for sure. You know, yeah, that's amazing.
So But yeah, me and my dad are good.

(10:15):
My mom is like the best. I'm seeing her today.
She's driving a she got bought an RV, she's driving down so
we're going to hang out and thenshe's going to see her grandson.
So it's cool. She going to go travel Canada or
what's what's her? Plan yeah she she bought this
cool RV. It's it's like a Sprinter, I
think it's called the Thor Expedition or something.
It's on a Mercedes frame. It's like the it's the best

(10:36):
shower in there and. That's awesome.
Yeah, so she's like kind of retired, so she does what she
wants. She's just going to go live free
for a while. Yeah.
Yeah, that's awesome. And you got an 8 month old at
home. First child?
Yeah. What's that like?
I think it's the best thing in the world because, you know, you
think you love your wife and you, you have, you have this

(10:57):
amount of love you can give out to the world, But I think having
a child kind of like increases the capacity that you can love.
So it's so it's like a, it's like every day is like AI just
can't like, I just can't understand.
It's like a, it's like, I think the closest thing that I, I
could, that could compare to looking into the face of God is

(11:18):
when I look at his face, 'cause it's like, what is he, Who does
he come from? He's like so perfect, you know
what I mean? So, so it's just, it's like,
sometimes it's like overwhelming, but like you, you
take it out in any way and it's just a, it's a good feeling,
especially like you, you have a Good Wife, you have, you have
the house. It's like, it's the perfect like
scenario. There's, there's no complaints

(11:39):
at all. I mean, I could complain, but
that would just dull them, like,make the moment not as good, you
know? There's nothing to complain
about, yeah. Yeah, you still able to keep up
on training and work and you find a balance.
Yeah, I mean, for sure. I mean, I don't train in the gym
as much right now. I started doing grappling just

(12:00):
to give it a, you know, give it a little change.
And man, this is like way harderthan working on in the gym.
It's like you have a 200 LB dumbbell coming at you trying to
strangle you. It's like a little bit harder
than just a dumbbell press. And you know, at this age, like
the the injuries come a little bit.
More, you know what it is, if atfirst I was really hurting
myself because I I was, if somebody comes at me, you're

(12:22):
trying to you get stiff, you're trying to muscle it out.
And if you don't know a lot of technique, you just want to kind
of like, what can I do? Just overpower and grip and then
my arms would be destroyed. But now you got to be just more
loose and relaxed. It's almost like when you're
grappling, like jujitsu, whatever, It's like you almost
like think about like, oh, you're playing.
You're just doing a game. You're not trying to like.
Stay fluid. Yes, yeah.

(12:43):
So yeah, I've been doing that. I trained, I I still train every
day, but then I'll, I'll do the gym like 3 * a week.
Maybe I'll do, I'll try to try to grappling twice.
And I'm like, there's a yoga place near my house and I also
have some time. I got to, I want to go back to
the yoga once a week. It's just that I want to do all
these things. It's just that sometimes with

(13:03):
the kid, it's just that it takesa lot of time, which is, which
is fine. And I also want to want her to
do, to have time too, because she's still breastfeeding.
So for her, she's, she's like 24/7 just doing like the best
job at being being a mom. But it's like she doesn't have a
lot of, you know, she sees me going and doing stuff.
It's like she wished she could. So I, I like yesterday.

(13:25):
I, I was like, OK, now you can, you want to go work out now.
So she would just went for her first run in a long time and I
was just looking for the baby. So I have to like because she's
so like focused, I have to like tell her like, hey, go do
something. I'll look for the baby.
But I have to think about that because I think about other
things too. So it's just it's an adjustment.
But I think with communication and patience and compassion,

(13:48):
it's you can, you know, can dealwith it.
Are you still? When I met you five years ago,
you were training at at Pierre. Are you still training up here?
Are you? Training.
No, no, I'm near near the by in Hamilton.
It's called amazing fitness. It's like just 8 minutes from my
house. Yeah 'cause I if I cross the to
go to Burlington and come back at peak hours, it's just like
I'm. Weird.
An hour and a half of travel. I'm wasting time.

(14:10):
Yeah, you know for sure. So, but who knows, maybe, maybe
I'll get the, you know, I'll go there again.
But it, it depends because they're trying to deals with
stuff with the court, the the family there, that the, the, my
friends that own the gym there. So I try to wait it out, see
what happens with that. Yeah, but but I didn't go back

(14:30):
there in a while. Yeah.
Yeah, man, that place like for me is like being this super
small guy. I went there with a buddy who's
a, he's a, he's a member there and he was, he's a firefighter,
like much bigger than I am. Everybody was so nice there all
the time. And this was before they
expanded like to the other, to the other side when the
trampoline park went out of business.
But man, trying to work out there was the most intimidating

(14:51):
thing I've ever been through in my life.
Because like no problem. Like I can go to LA or Mavati or
anywhere else. And like, I don't mind being
like the small guy. But man, when you're trying to
work out and like you're watching guys there workout and
girls like and like the production stuff that they
always have going on, it was like super intimidating.
After like 2 weeks, I'm like this isn't my place.
Like everybody was so nice, but I'm like this is not my place to

(15:12):
be. Yeah, I mean, I did not fit.
Yeah, if you're if you're not comfortable, you don't have to
be there, but. And that was more like a
self-conscious thing. It wasn't anybody else doing
that. It was just, it was a
self-conscious thing. I I get it, I get it.
But most, most people are nice. There'll be some Dick heads, but
like if you go to the grocery store, there's some Dick.
Heads everywhere, nice people for sure.
So it's the same thing, right? So you just, we'll always try to

(15:34):
gravitate towards the positive people.
For sure. So, but yeah, it's it's it was
an awesome place, like a good, good vibe for training and all
the cameras because of content, right.
Yeah, for sure. Like everybody's a fitness
influencer nowadays. If you work out, then you you
have results. You kind of want to share them
online. Yeah.
And I get that. You know, that's the reason why
I was starting doing video was all these years ago.

(15:55):
I was saying like with the martial arts stuff, I I was
doing like cool tricks. Oh, I want, I want my friends to
see that. So I would put it online, right.
It's like you want to get the with the validation and just
share what you're passionate about.
So, so I I get it. So yeah, the, the gym was a this
gym is crazy place for like content filming and it's also
good because the background are dark and uniform.

(16:16):
So if you can stand out. So it was created in the with
that in mind too. So it's like the the hub for
like like content creation and stuff.
But now there's there's more andmore popping off the for that
style, you know? Yeah.
For sure. Yeah.
And you've built a really nice online presence for yourself.
What? What do you attribute that to?
Yeah. You got a big following, you got

(16:37):
half a million followers just onInstagram.
Yeah, I, I think I, I got on Instagram when it first came
out, I didn't know what it was, right?
And I was doing videos on YouTube.
My first one was 2008. I uploaded there and it was on
and off because, you know, I wasstruggling with like drugs,
addiction and stuff like kind oflike fell off and coming back

(16:58):
fell off. And it's just not good for the,
the algorithm. But I don't, I think it was why
I got popular is because there was not a lot of people doing
content back then. So that gave me a little boost
at the beginning. And then just because I was
pretty good at the, the bodybuilding when winning my pro
card, doing the content, postingstuff on Instagram and then

(17:19):
doing these shows and 'cause every time you do a show, you
get shredded. And then you get people are
like, oh shit, you get more traction if you're like super
lean and freaky looking, right? So like every time you do a
prep, you gain a few, a bunch offollowers.
Usually people share your things.
If you win shows, you become more popular.
And it's just a bit in the bodybuilding industry for like

(17:42):
22 years when you think about it, if you start when I was 16.
So that's why I guess, you know,if you're good enough at
something for a long time and you share online, people are
going to notice. And yeah, I also think because I
I try to just be myself too, when I just go online and stuff,
I just, I don't try to like fakeanything.

(18:03):
And I just, you know, people like my videos because some of
them are funny, some of them aregoofing around.
And yeah, you do random shit like just gardening and like
fucking plants and stuff that you're grown.
Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I share what's going on.
You know, sometimes though, whenthings were crazier, I was
sharing the more crazy stuff. But now it's like I'm gardening.
Here's my son. My how those videos change over
time I know. Which is fine, you know, like I

(18:26):
think that's something I was struggling with doing sometimes
I still don't like because I hadto go to YouTube, right?
I got like a good amount of subscribers like I don't know
what to do there. Let's like do a because I don't
feel like I want to do a training video really because
I've done that for so long. But if I feel like it, I'll do
it. So what am I supposed to post
about then I I have to remember like why I started YouTube.

(18:48):
You know, sometime when you start something, you kind of
lose interest. You got to go back to why you
started it. I just want to start it to just
share stuff I like pretty much to do.
So I need to just go back to that and and do it.
So yeah, it's some weird videos coming up about gardening and
nunchuckoos and stuff. So yeah, it's fine though.
That's great. Yeah, take us through a bit of

(19:08):
the path like like when you, when you first got your pro card
and then, you know, take us through a little bit of your
professional career and like some of the things you've been
through and. Yeah, so when I got my pro card,
I was just like, I broke up like3 weeks prior and it was kind of
a rough breakup. You know, when you're younger
and you think you really love somebody and you're kind of
codependent almost, it's like kind of roughly emotionally,

(19:32):
it's like it kind of hurts your heart, right?
So I was like I got to eat all my meals, do all my cardio and
then I the show really helped meout.
And then I kind of like overcamethe breakup.
And then if you then I won my pro card, which is like the
highest level you can get in Canada on the on when you're not
a professional. And then I won the pro card and
that was like a giant really. I think the one of the best

(19:52):
feelings in my life was like, you know, besides stuff related
to my family and stuff and beinglike happy about that.
But like a one shot thing of feeling is that even more than
drugs that I did was like when Iwon that pro card, it was like,
Oh, I struggled, overcame and I came out the at the best of what
what I do in Canada. So that then I became.

(20:14):
The pro like all the idols that I looked at when I was younger,
like Ronnie, Jay Cutler, all these guys, I became the same
rank as them. So then I was like, wow, this
this whole time she gave me a hard time.
It wasn't going well. I stayed off like the party too
during that time too. Now I was like, oh, got my pro
card, you know, I deserve to party.

(20:35):
I felt the title that now I could actually party a little
bit and and lay back. But for me also what happened is
that I had a sponsor back then, Universal, so I stopped working
out at the gym just before the prep so I could focus on the
prep and also just do the sponsor stuff videos for that.
So I came out young, single, in shape and all the stuff and then

(20:59):
like the best at something. I was like feeling good,
entitled that I need to parties and then I have no schedule.
So I started partying as much asI want.
So like, who wants to party on aTuesday at the one PM, 2:00 PM?
Like if you think of who it's not people who are normal.
Not people that are being successful.
No, it's like, no, I mean it's successful.
I. Almost put my hand up there to

(21:20):
you. We're available like strippers,
you know, like who's who's awakein the afternoon and want to
party like strippers, drug dealers or whatever, right?
Yeah. So I'm not any of that.
I'm not from that world at all. But like these were the people
who were crazy enough to do to party with me.
So I started hanging out with those people.
And then because I didn't have any structure anymore, I just

(21:44):
started doing like drugs more often and partying more often.
And and then something what happens is if you, if you just
say like the if you use any substances because you don't
accept the moment as it is now and you want to change it,
right. So whatever my life was wasn't
enough. Then I add I found something
that made me feel really good and I liked and then yeah, I did

(22:04):
that enough times. It became a habit.
I would slow down for two weeks and then I would I would
justify, Oh, I I did good for two weeks.
Let's do another weekend. And then I would it would never
be AI never stopped doing drugs.One I said I would with the
amount that I said before. It never worked as planned.
So and then I would go back and forth try yo-yo, and then I

(22:25):
would always try to come back todo a show and I couldn't.
So my career was like I did a show 1013, but I didn't do good
because of that problem. And then all I did was like, oh,
I've got to come back. And then I would fail miserably.
And then and then I would try again, fail again, relapse.
And just I would just do that for a while.
And then my friend said before he passed away, he would, he

(22:47):
kind of told me before he passedall you got to go back to
bodybuilding and what you're doing.
And then he goes away. He just runs away from the house
for some reason. And then six days later they
found him dead in the shed because he like OD during the
winter, whatever he was doing the opiates.
And so that's I was like, you know what, I think party's over.
So you can't even find a video on my YouTube January 5th, 1015.

(23:09):
I think it's like called like why I was away.
Whatever. I explained a little bit of that
that no, I was I couldn't stop partying, whatever.
I don't know how I worded it, but pretty much that I was
addicted and now I'm coming backso the whole world knows I'm
accountable. 2 weeks later I relapsed.
So I was like, wait, I thought because I decided I would stop,

(23:32):
that I could actually stop. Especially with that wake up
call of your buddy and dying. Yeah, exactly.
So but then two weeks later, I relaxed again.
OK, Now it's going to be the last time I do it.
So I would go hard because it's the last time.
So now every time was the last time in my head.
After that, I would go even harder and harder.
So it's just, yeah, it wasn't good.

(23:52):
So I it's just I realized that Icouldn't, couldn't stop.
And then I thought that moving to Toronto, Montreal's the
problem. I'll go to Toronto.
I mean, I got there, I was high.And then I met this, you know, I
met a girl, go live with her or I got to this place in the same
building as her actually. And I thought this girlfriend,

(24:12):
you know, would make me stay normal, but she would go party
and I couldn't. I was like at home, just
freaking out, you know, like then I would relapse because she
would. I had no recovery.
So I was triggered easily, right?
And the obsession was still there.
It's like a even if you think about not doing drugs all day,
you're still thinking about drugs all day.

(24:33):
So I was still obsessed, right? Always obsessed over over drugs.
My brain is how it was hard wired like that.
So when she finds me passed out in my car, 'cause she had to
find my friend because I was up for a few days and I just pulled
my car just in time and I think my car was still running or
something. So she knocked on my door.
What are you doing? I was like so confused.

(24:54):
And then she brought me to the back to our place and she said
you got to go to rehab. And it took me like 2 seconds.
I look at my track record. I said, yeah, sure, I'll go
because I by myself, I couldn't do it.
So I was like, yeah, whatever. I said I'll, I'll go.
Like I'm not still going to argue.
I have no, like I can see it like a I'm caught red handed and
I just keep lying and stuff. So I said I'll go.

(25:16):
So that was the start of my of my recovery for real where I
went to a program that was 1000 15, my first one.
This is why I started my recovery and.
Can I ask what that program was meant?
The program was called The Rehabwas Addiction in Canada, but
what I got introduced to the 12 steps in there, 12 steps is like

(25:38):
AA, but there's an A there's OA for over eaters Anonymous.
There's Sex Love Anonymous for like the sex addicts and stuff
and they're the. How many of those classes were
you set up with them? Oh, I tried, you know, it's what
I tried a few of them, but Nana is the best for me 'cause it's
an architect's anonym. And so that's the 12 steps I do,

(25:59):
but I'm not the representative of NAI.
Just use the program 'cause sometimes like there's in the
program that it's part of the principles is like we never like
talk about like our representative of the program,
just like the, the we have to keep like some type of like
anonymity or whatever. It's it's so I'm not a
representative. I just like to spread the
message to just still suffering addict.

(26:21):
So that's that's why that's why I talk about my my recovery of
my program. But yeah, so the I got
introduced to the program there and and then I did five of the
rehabs after that. So it wasn't like a for I did 30
days. I'm good and then I thought I
was good and three days later I relapsed after my first one.
Fuck. Yeah, I was just, I couldn't.

(26:41):
I was just couldn't do it. I was just It's like you decide
one thing and then you you'll change your mind.
It just had so much control overyou.
Yeah, yeah, for a long time tookme a lot of suffering and and
rock bottoms to like finally like get it.
And were you still training through all of this?
Not not as hard. When I was partying, I was in

(27:03):
training, but then as soon as I would stop, I would start
training right away. So I would like my genetics
would keep me for a while when Iwas partying and then I would
bounce back really quick when I was training.
So it's like I got lucky. Because your muscle memory would
bounce back. Yeah, yeah.
Because I was younger too and I'm guessing now that would
probably not be the case. But it's just, I was younger
and, and lucky, I guess for that, you know, so there was a

(27:26):
lot of a lot of struggles. How long have you been totally
clean now? For well now that we're four
years good for you yeah, thanks.But when you make the math is
that I have 10 years of recovery, only four years.
So there was six years that I was like, I did 5 rehabs.
Well, I had a before my last rehab, I was good for a little
while, But with, with COVID, what happened is the, oh, there

(27:47):
was no, they, they actually banned the meetings.
Can't go to meetings anymore in person, right?
Because the 12 step meetings, you could go in person.
There's like you're on Google, you find meetings in your area
very easily, But they closed those down because of like the,
the virus or whatever, right? So within two weeks in
Burlington, two people overdosedand died when as soon as they
stopped the meetings. So it's like it actually killed
people. And so, so they started doing

(28:09):
the meetings on Zoom and they went, they had it already, but
they had, they brought them backin the parking lots just because
they people really needed it. It's just makes you realize that
like the the opposite of addiction is connection.
So isolation is right related with addiction.
So it's like, it's like they they made the people like every

(28:32):
week. Yeah, yeah, it's set up to fail.
Yeah. So anyway, so I didn't want to
do this once, so I didn't, I stopped doing my recovery
program, met a girl who was drinking.
And then slowly I was like, oh, I can drink.
I was like, I would probably OK,now it's been so long, right?
I could probably drink, which I did drink, but then I, I would
drink it and I would think, whenam I, when am I going to feel

(28:53):
this? That's that's what my brain
right away said. It's like, I don't think
everybody like thinks like that.They probably drink and they
just enjoy the moment. They all like the taste and they
just take their time. Because you don't drink to get
high or drunk. Most people drink socially.
Yeah, I was like, I was like, OK, what am I going to feel
this? Do I need another one in 15
minutes? Should I do it like 3 pulled
vodka? Like what should I do?

(29:14):
I was already thinking then I then I I would stop and then I'd
be like, oh, OK, I'm good. So when's the last time I can
do? I can do it.
So it's like this is how my brain thinks.
Anything that's a substance, I will think like that.
So yeah, I could probably go fora little bit without anything
really bad happening. But in my brain is like is right
away going to be like trying to like obsess over it already.

(29:36):
And I don't even like alcohol, you know, I never liked it.
So I started introducing that, introducing something else.
Then eventually the girl like really hurt me.
Then you're when you're really angry, you don't think, right?
It's like when you're angry, your IQ goes down, the angry you
are. So when I was like really angry
about with about my ex or whatever, I was like, and then
this other girl from Montreal was like texting me, hey, you

(29:57):
want to party? I'm like, Ciao.
I just left her and I just partied.
And yeah, so that was right before my 5th rehab, which I
went after that. And then since then I've been
good. Yeah.
Feel like something clicked there.
Well, it's as soon as it's because I stopped doing the
program, right? Because now I look back at my,

(30:19):
my relapse didn't start as soon as I drank or before I started
long before that. That's when I stopped doing my
recovery program in the meetings.
And then slowly it's like it's imagine you're doing a race
against addiction or the devil. And if you slow down.
Catches. Up catches up eventually, right?
So that's what happened. It's when I say I'm in recovery.

(30:40):
It's like I'm not going to be recovered one day.
I'm doing recovery every day forthe rest of my life.
You're. You're always running from that
devil. Yeah, but I just think about
today. So today, what can I do to stay
clean, be the best I can be and do the right thing and be true.
And then I try to do the best ofthat until I go to bed, go to
bed, wake up the next day, thinkof the same thing.
And then this is how the days pile up.

(31:01):
It's not, it's not like I do. So one step to 12:00 and then
I'm done. Step 12.
Then I'm, oh, I'm healed. There's not like that.
So if I stop this, it's like imagine that addiction is a
disease and then you let's see if you have a, you're diabetic,
you stop taking insulin, your blood sugar will go high and
that's the point you'll die. Well, I'm an addict disease of

(31:21):
addiction. If I stop my recovery, which is
my medicine, what happens? I'm sick still, I'll get sick
again. It's like a that that's how,
that's how I am. It's like my brain is hardwired
to kill myself pretty much with the, with the different things
like drugs. So I need to like take something
for that. And my take something is
actually a spiritual program, which is kind of weird right,

(31:43):
when you think about it because.We hear a ton about it, man.
Like we're we're big believers in that for.
Sure. Nice.
Yeah. So, yeah, because before the
Bill and Bob rolled the 12 steps, there was the the there
was no opiates epidemic. There was no opiates.
I saw that opiates, yeah, opiateepidemic.
So there was no period epidemic.There was an alcohol epidemic

(32:06):
and the people were in the hospital dying.
They would try to figure it out with science and this and that
and all kinds of therapy wouldn't working with them.
So they would come back worse every time.
And then Bill and Bob met finance guy and a doctor.
They were both Alcoholics and they tried to meet, they met at
some point and we're like wantedto like find a solution for

(32:28):
that. And then they would go around
different hospitals and help people and just try to hear them
out and just think of some ways.And that I'm really like
summarizing it like. You're making it simpler than it
was and. And then what happened is that
they realized that both of them didn't drink for months.
Hey, we didn't drink for months.So what?

(32:50):
What happened is because they were together 2 recovering
addicts helping other people. This is a cure it it, it gave
them like a purpose and direction and this was so this
this is this has to be the program.
So the 12 steps is a way of living pretty much.
And if you if you follow it it it works.

(33:13):
That's the prescription. And that's the prescription.
And The thing is this, after that addiction is the only thing
that can cure it. Well, not cure it, but like put
it in to a halt and improve yourlife.
Everything else. There's no pills that make you
stop wanting to do drugs. There's none of that.
Not so once where science failed, this spiritual program
prevailed and saved millions of lives with that book.

(33:35):
They wrote the big book of a they saved millions of lives and
all the 12 step programs came from that.
So that's a one-on-one little story.
But like it's crazy how like a spiritual program actually saved
lives where medicine couldn't even like do it.
There's like there's a proof right there that that it works.
I've never heard of like anything else working as well as

(33:55):
that for addiction. And the big piece of that, too,
is the part you touched on when you said about, you know, during
COVID times, the meetings being closed.
Yeah, the community piece is so important.
That's what it is. Like, yeah, having support,
having camaraderie, having like,your example of the two folks
going through recovery at the same time.
I'll get a, you know, Adm or an e-mail and it'll be a guy

(34:16):
reaching out who might be in crisis or is looking for, like,
what those next steps might be. There's no, no, and until you
have somebody who's willing to have a conversation, hold hands,
take, take that road together, that's that's powerful shit.
But there's a lot of guys that don't don't take the step.
No. You know, think they can beat
it. Think.
Of course, Step 1 is like admitting you're powerless over

(34:37):
your addiction. And, and they think that that's
a failure if they have to admit something like that.
But it's not really like really that's the that's the, that's
the award is, is realizing that you're you've got something to
overcome. I mean, it's never fun when you
start started. So yeah, you feel like a
failure, but but yeah, you're probably sick of being sick and
tired at that point anyway. So it's like you want to change,

(34:58):
right? It's like there's like the gift
of desperation. It's a thing when recovery.
It's like when you're in despair, it's almost like a gift
because this is the this will bethe catalyst to start your
recovery. The lower you have to hit the
rock bottom because that honestly, if I didn't have all
these bad consequences, I would probably still be doing drugs,
right? It's like, why would I be lying?

(35:19):
If you were just coasting and. Competing, yeah, I could get
away. I could get away with it.
I would have kept doing it because that's all of my brain
was. But I couldn't.
That's the thing. I was not a functioning addict
at all. And.
Since your recovery, like you, you crushed it, like you went
back to to competing again and. Yeah, went back to competing.
Came back. I did the two pro shows.
I went to the Olympia twice. I did Arnold Classic in March.

(35:42):
Not this year, the year before. Yeah.
No, I did the if I remove drugs from my life, it's like
everything goes well. So and also a thing that people
have to understand is that when you start doing drugs, it's like
your emotional growth stops there.
So if you start in your early 20s or teenage years, it's like
once you stop, you'll have the emotional intelligence of like a

(36:03):
teenager. So it's kind of like, you know,
then you once you get clean, it takes a while to learn how to
live without drugs and to deal with life on life's terms.
So that took a while too. But I feel now it's like with
the timing of meeting my wife like 4 years ago, whatever than
having the house and this is everything was perfect.

(36:23):
So it's like a now it's like whatever was occurs before, like
my addiction was, occurs now. It's like a blessing.
It's like a it was like an affliction before and now it's
like I'm grateful for it. I'm grateful that I went through
all this stuff and I'm grateful for everything because now it
led me to me having a beautiful wife and son.
If I change whatever anything inthe past, it wouldn't, it

(36:44):
wouldn't be the same today. So it's like it's pretty cool.
How did the whole trajectory howhow it happened?
It's amazing, man. It's a great story.
Yeah. That is so much of it though.
You know, Jamie and I talk aboutloss, we talk about the things
that have defined us, and it usually comes out of some kind
of call it tragedy or some kind of, you know, just shit hitting
the fan. And then you're like, oh, well,

(37:05):
that didn't feel good. Got to pick up those pieces.
And it's hard, man, It's hard. What's so looking forward?
We got a new baby boy. We got a great relationship.
What do you think's next? I'm in, I think just spend time
with my son and my family, make sure they go.
It's, it's funny because when you're young, I was younger,

(37:27):
it's like I wanted to like pretty much like crazy ambitions
of like obviously competing, being the best, you know, and in
Canada getting the pro card and try to change the world somehow,
but have a big impact. But now that I have my son and
my wife, you know what, if I canjust be there for my son and
make sure he's got everything and her too.
This is it. It's like my purpose is like

(37:48):
went from all this to like way, way smaller and I'm, I'm, I'm OK
with that. So it's like I'll just focus on
that it. Almost takes the pressure off on
everything else too, right? Yeah, because it's like, OK, all
this other shit that I thought matter don't don't really matter
that much. Yeah.
So I'm it's good, but and also like if I just do my best every

(38:08):
day and I remove the expectations, I'm going to get
the best outcome for me in the world out of myself anyway.
So it's like I could just focus on that, right?
Yeah. So As for the future, I mean,
yeah, I'm just still like enjoying and adapting to like a
fatherhood, I guess. So I'm going to focusing on that
just working projects with my friends and the my sponsors and

(38:31):
stuff and working out the grapplings a new goal.
Because if you, if I don't compete like for a year or two,
I need to have another goal because I do want to always
better myself in something. And if I don't, I just don't
feel like I don't feel good about myself.
Yeah, you feel like no progress.Yeah, it's like it goes back.
It's like if you want to go backto like when I was my first

(38:53):
divorced, you know, you think you're worthless, you're not
good enough. Well, that fear drove all my
decisions after without me noticing, excluding like trying
to be a bodybuilder would be thebest of what I do because I felt
I was never good enough. I was working so hard because
there was a little voice in my head.
I said, don't be a little bitch every day.
It's still there, right? So I I just know it's there now.
And I try to just not never act out of fear because it's never a

(39:16):
good way to act in life, act outof fear, but I can acknowledge
it childhood when it's needed and and it keep going.
But that's why I'm I always try to do something and get better
at something because I feel likeI wouldn't feel good mentally if
I would If I would just sit on my ass and do nothing.
If I if I would just sit there and do nothing hard, I would

(39:37):
start like feeling really bad mentally.
When you, you said it, man. When you slow down, that's when
the devil creeps up. Yes, right.
It'll hands our devil's playground is there.
Yeah, yeah, we. Actually had to say that.
Just the other deck. Nice.
Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah. Well, it's, that's true.
Yeah. It's Jiu.
Jitsu and grappling like that's no no easy under.
No. And The thing is, it's crazy
because that's a crazy transition because I was the

(39:59):
pretty much everywhere I walked except like if I hang out with
some of my friends and if I compete in the Olympia, I was
the best of what I do wherever Iwalked.
Yeah, right. I'm the bodybuilder guy.
There was like I was top 15, right?
So I was just like, so everywhere I walked, I was the
best. And people were like, you know,
they still comment obviously andstuff.
So I was like, OK, I get used toit.

(40:20):
So I'm, I'm used of being at that level in what I do and what
I love. And now I start grappling.
I get my ass handed to me. They're all like yesterday this
shout out to ya, Nick from grappling garden.
Well, I got my ass kicked like for an hour.
I could I couldn't get I couldn't win one thing.

(40:41):
It's like a. Half your body weight, probably.
He's small, yeah, he's in good shape, but he's like, he has
like 60 lbs less than me probably.
And I was just like getting likea handle like crazy.
It's just like, and I was exhausted.
I had to take a straw break and he was like just waiting.
So it's like when you're used tobeing the best at something and
then you suck at something else so hard.

(41:01):
And it's also like, as a man, you don't want to think that
you, you lose a fight. That's it's, it's rough on a, on
a guy's ego. But This is why I think the
sport is so good because you'll be comfortable in the that
situation. And then if you're comfortable
there, this is where you improvethe most and then you.
Can put them back in a spot and be like, hey, let's go over to
the bench press. We'll pull some plates on.

(41:21):
Yeah, yeah. Let let's see what you can do
there. Yeah, but he doesn't do it.
He doesn't want to do that, right?
Like me, I want to do the grappling.
So I'm stepping into their worldnow.
So I got to deal, deal with that.
But I think it's a lot of fun. And obviously when I had
somebody who was not as good after, I just, it was easy for
me. If you do something really,
really hard, like if you try to beat a game on hard mode and you
can't do it at all, but then youtry, you try normal mode, and

(41:43):
then, oh, this is easy. This is what you can do.
Like if you only do things that you're good at and things that
you don't lose and you don't fail, you're never gonna really
improve, right? Yeah.
So that's the cool thing about grappling and that's why I
started doing it because I need to do something hard that my, I
can like feed that satisfy that voice inside my head that says

(42:06):
don't be a little bitch. I feed him like some, some dog
food and here you go. So here's some of that.
So now you just leave me alone, right?
So that's why I'm I'm I'm doing that.
If it wasn't that, it would be something else.
But a lot of times it, I think it has to require discipline and
something physical for me to be satisfied with that.
Yeah, because I am. I got other goals are more like,

(42:26):
oh, right, I got to write this book, I got to do that.
And I don't really do it as wellas much because I don't feel
like it's satisfying that inner voice, you know?
Yeah, for sure. So.
Do you think as the like kiddo'sonly eight months old, so maybe
when the kids 2/2 and 1/2 and yeah, your time is less needed

(42:46):
around the house day-to-day, do you think you might get back
into like maybe competing at over 40 or something like that?
Compete for sure. Yeah.
I don't know when. I don't know if it's at 40 or
before, but. You're 38 right now.
I'll be 38 in the at the end of the month.
Yeah yeah. So yeah, for sure I'll copy one
more time. I think so.
I mean, I say that, but you never know what the future
holds. Maybe I'll do like a whole year

(43:07):
of like multiple shows, like whoknows?
But that that I know I can do. Yeah.
Because I've multiple times in the past I I would get out of
rehab or a bicep injury and I would lose muscle.
And I think you guys literally tore your bicep at the exact
same time yours. Yeah.
Would you do for both? Ohh you you did both.
This one, 2019. Yeah, we got the same scar,

(43:27):
which was I was 2019. Yeah, December, yeah.
I remember. Yeah, well, are you a lefty or
righty? Right-handed, but I tore my
left. OK, I was right-handed and tore
my right. You ever try wiping your ass
with your other hand? It's not funny, so it's
challenging. Then I tore this one here in
2021, and that was easy because I'm right-handed.
Yeah, but I wasn't in rehab, so I had to ask.

(43:49):
But you were you also competed like a year after that A.
Year after I wore Chosen, Yeah. So I know how to come back and
get in shape. That's not a problem.
But yeah, and we have, I had my,my cat, I had to remove it and
did this. The, the, the counselors or the
nurses would have to like strap in like put Saarin around my arm
to go in the shower. It was so weird and it sucks.
You know, you're coming down andyou have like 1 arm in a cast

(44:09):
and you're like, Oh yeah, I guess I got my ass kicked.
I'm being a bitch. Yeah, I don't.
I don't. Yeah.
I don't have a choice to be 1 right now because I made bad
decisions for weeks on end. Yeah, yeah, but yeah, no, but
for sure you said that one of myson's two if I've they don't
have to be as home as much. Compete again.

(44:31):
I think so. Yeah.
Yeah, probably. Do you think you'll go down the
path of like, because you've gota ton of background in this?
Like do you think after you compete then maybe you just you
go into like coaching and training other other guys that
want to get into? It or yeah, or you do that one
client right now. I mean, I, I, I'd like to train
more people. I just didn't get to it didn't
get to promoting it anymore because I've been so busy.

(44:52):
But I do want to train people. I do online.
I get a website avbodybuilding.com.
There's a my e-mail there. You can go there e-mail me and I
think my wife is going to answerthat and then I will just
connect or you can go on my Instagram Antwon V87 send Adm
like some clients right now. So I do download client and I
use this app fit log. It's pretty cool because you can

(45:14):
track everything on there. Like I put all the meals, all
the training, all the cardio on there.
So it's like I could just revisepeople really well.
And I everyday if they want to send me a message, I can answer
to them too. So I get good service.
I just didn't get to it yet. So, but for sure when you retire
or even even when you don't retire, like my friend Morgan is
competing like in August 5th or 6th and he has like a lot of

(45:37):
clients, a lot of clients, but he's at the peak of his career
too in bodybuilding. So I don't have an an excuse
right now. Like I'm not even like I'm like
semi retired and doesn't matter and I can have more clients.
So I do a lot of that. I treat people at the gym in
amazing fitness too, a few clients and stuff.
But I also my wife always tells me that she's grateful that we

(46:00):
don't have a conventional life of nine to five because I can be
there with her. So do I want to work more?
Like my head says, yes. Provide more where you're going
to lose everything. You know, it's like you're as a
man, you're afraid of like of not providing right sometimes.
So you stress about money even if you have a lot of money,
which I don't say I have, but it's just a feeling, you know?

(46:22):
You're blessed to be able to pick and choose though.
Yes, exactly. So now I can like, oh, maybe I,
I won't work too much and I'll be with my son and wife more and
then I know if something would happen, I can like ramp it up
and just. Yeah, if the right opportunity
comes across the table. Yeah, yeah, I've been fine so
far, you know, and I've been in the really bad situations
before, so I know I'll be fine. And you got some great brands

(46:43):
that you that you're a part of too, right?
Yeah, yeah. Jack Factory, actually from
Canada, Newfoundland shelter, Jack Factory, Elevate Foods,
actually Doran and Blake. And then my friends, they have
the cream of rice. They they got that and by all
the health Subs and and and stuff too.
That's that's all the supplements that you're online.
Jack Factory. Yeah.
Jack Factory is the the, the, the main one.

(47:05):
They're, they're they're the best.
Yeah. And the owner of school, too.
He does jujitsu too. So now it's like we have that in
common too. We'll go to Newfoundland after
that. So when is this coming out?
This podcast, you know. Usually three weeks.
Three to three to four weeks. OK, so first week of August.
Probably. Oh, that's cool.
That's fine. And but yeah, I've got all these
nice sponsors and it's great. And also IVB Amas, they do the

(47:30):
podcasts that I do with my friends and stuff.
We do mostly show reviews latelybecause it's IVB pro seasons
right now. It's like it's it's a that's its
peak and their show like every weekend so well.
You guys do all the nitpicking at all the other other guys,
yeah. Yeah, so exactly.
So we we see that we look at oiled up man and speedos on
stage and then we criticize how they look like, you know, it

(47:51):
sounds weird when you say it, but yeah, we go over the shows
and who's winning and and stuff.So it's a it's a it's a lot of
fun and we talk shit too, obviously.
Yeah, amongst friends. So that's on IVB, ama.org.
That's another thing I do. But I do.
I do some other stuff too. I just don't know.
It's good to do different things, I find.
Yeah, Yeah, for sure. Yeah.

(48:12):
That's awesome. We usually ask a few questions
to all of our guests. So obviously the title Shit My
Dad Taught me. You've talked a bit about your
dad. Yeah.
Something that your dad's like, really taught you that that
stuck with you. Well, I remember a story like it
wasn't French, but I probably meant the same thing.
So he wasn't working during the winter.
We were on the roof or something.

(48:32):
He was working on something and then he didn't have any mittens,
right. And I, I didn't have any
mittens. And I, I was like cold.
I would put, I would put in my hands in my sleeve.
And he said don't put your handsin your sleeve.
Don't be a little bitch. So right there and then he told
me that I wouldn't be worried ofhis validation if I, if I was a
little bitch, which is not good.What's?

(48:55):
The say just for just for my knowledge say it in French for
me. What's the translation?
If you put that tapet, tapet doesn't mean bitch, it means
FAG. Yes, yeah.
But yeah. So that's why I didn't say the
but yeah. But honestly, he was, he made

(49:16):
us, he was very strict and used a lot of discipline on us.
And he would control a lot of like he would only play video
games during the weekend. We had to play outside a lot.
So it's like I learned to, I never had everything that I
wanted. And maybe that's a good thing,
right. And he also taught me later on

(49:36):
about forgiveness. I had to learn that to forgive
him for forgive him of, for whathe did to me, just like not
being there, even though I thinkhe did his best, honestly, you
know, And so I, I had, I learnedforgiveness.
That's pretty one of the, the, the the better lessons I had
from him were like, we're not even him telling me stuff was
more like me dealing with all that.

(49:59):
What came out came out of it. So it's like it's more things
like that. There's nothing really like
that, he said. You know, because when you're
young, nine years old and. He didn't sit down and have a
heart to heart with. No, no, no.
And then I was hanging out with him too, like, for like a year,
1011 a little bit, but it's it'smost mostly like, besides not

(50:19):
being a little bitch and like show weakness in the cold.
Yeah, that's not a good example.I just thought it was it's it's
funny now, but you know, but like for I was thinking about
that the other way. Am I gonna if my son complaints
about his hands? What are you being cold?
What am I gonna say? Am I gonna be like, I don't
know. That's that's the thing I said

(50:41):
that is everything's new too. Like if you want to say the
right thing. You're gonna be like, oh, put
your hands in your armpits and get them warm.
Yeah. It's like shit like go go see
mommy should be that it's. I wouldn't probably say that
because I find it because I didn't have everything that I
needed sometimes or wanted it build it build me like even the
the the fear not bigger than enough.
Even the pain and suffering thatI had probably was a big factor

(51:03):
in me pushing myself hard as I could and successful in the
sport that I do. So it's like everyone who
struggles and overcomes becomes a better than the other people.
Everybody was everything they want.
It's like a trust from kids. They're the stereotype is like
Dick heads, you know? So it's like, so, yeah.
So what do I do? Do I make him?

(51:24):
You don't want to make him suffer by purpose.
That's why I think, like, sportsand things like that and
discipline and really making them sure they come into
something that's really where this can be channeled with and
channeled. But that's a good question.
Why would I tell my son? I would probably say like, well,
what are you going to do about it?
Please say that. Yeah, there you go.
Put it back on them. Yeah.
Where? Where's your Mets?
Yeah, we forgot. Just go back down and get your

(51:45):
mittens. Yeah.
So I would probably say that. Yeah.
And then and then when I come back, I say, oh, good job.
You know you always want to give.
Them validation. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
So it's like, I want to be harshon them and they didn't realize,
like, yeah, that's dumb. Yeah, if you it's your fault, go
get your mittens. And I think I would do something
like that, not say like, don't be a little bitch, keep their

(52:06):
hands out and freeze there. Don't give me any other options.
Fuck my dad. I would have been afraid to go
to him. I would, I would rather like sit
there until they're like purple and black and I wouldn't have
showed them. I would have been scared to tell
my Yeah, for some reason, the older generations, they were
like a little bit harsh. Just I can't even think about my
my dad's dad with him, you know,yeah, you know, they probably
had like real fights at some point that I heard and stuff.

(52:27):
And but yeah, I think the generations are getting a little
bit softer, which is good. You know, like now I can easily
speak about my emotions and stuff like even in front of
people that that I won't even see and stuff in the online.
But so it means with my son, I'll be able to speak about the
emotions. Like, yeah, it's OK, live your
emotion. But and whatever, my wife is

(52:49):
better at this than me, honestly.
But but back then they didn't dothat.
So there's improvement there. But they don't want to be too
soft either, I'm sure. So it's like there needs to be a
good balance in the middle. And right now he's too young for
me to even apply that and find out what it was.
But I. Still wanna see them go through
some adversity, right? Like yes, we don't want our kids
to coast through life as much aslike they could if they wanted.

(53:09):
You guys have kids too? Yeah, I've got three boys and
he's got 2 girls. 2 Yeah, yeah. Oh, girls, yeah, I didn't think
about that. Girl dad times too, but that's
also. I got lucky 3 boys.
Oh my God. What's crazy about your men?
The example is I'm playing that in my head with my girls.
And I'd actually play it differently depending on the kid
because like, I can talk to one different than I can talk to the
other. Like with with Lucy, my my

(53:30):
oldest, like she loves to chirp and she loves to like joke
around or whatever. So I could play it that way.
But then with Ella, like if she told me her hands are cold, her
hands are cold. Like she'd never over
exaggerate. She's not dramatic at all.
So then my answer to her would just be, well, we gotta, we
gotta go get you some Mitt, sweetie.
Like let's go. Like that would be how I'd play
that. I think it's different by kids.

(53:51):
And I think when your son gets alittle older, you'll see that
personality. Come out to deal with him.
Yeah, yeah. Kids will show us the way man.
So then Fast forward 20 years, your son is sitting in front of
Jamie and I and we ask him give me some shit your dad taught
you. What do you hope you would say?
I. Would hope you would say to be

(54:14):
yourself. You taught me how to be myself
and to always try to do my best and be true or something.
I don't know. That's the most basic thing,
right? Everybody wants to.
Be real authenticity. Just be real.
Yeah, be real and just do your best.
Yeah, go back to your answer about content.
That's why your shit plays well.Yeah, it's authentic, right?
Like you know who you are. And yeah, that's a skill.

(54:37):
Yeah. I mean, yeah, some people are
just not good at being themselves.
If you as soon as there's like lights or a camera, it's like,
oh. And a lot of them, a lot of
people are like, what's going toget me more followers?
So then most of that content isn't real content either
because it's them, Yeah, bullshitting and playing shit.
But like, just be you. Yeah, I've tried, I've tried.

(54:58):
Sometimes I'll I'll do a trend and it's like anything force.
I don't like it. It's but sometimes I oh, this is
actually funny. I want to do this thing just
like I will really do it if I really want to do it.
Well, some people are like, theyhave like a bullshit detector.
They're like, yeah, this is thislike a especially I find me
sometimes some I can only see something of what they do and
I'm like, something's soft. That's not it.

(55:20):
It's so staged, yeah. What is?
What is that? It's like an intuition or
something. Built in, built in.
We all have it, man. Yeah, yeah.
Originally that would have been some survival shit.
Oh. Yeah, we judge in .2 seconds on
a fucking real right? Yeah, it's real.
Yeah. We have a little segment on the
show where we call bring us a dad joke.
Did you bring us a dad joke today?

(55:41):
Yeah, I did. Why?
No, I thought, what's the other one?
I had another one. That's better.
Let me. See if you can look it up.
Take your. Time I've always done yeah yeah.
Love on SEC Oh yeah. Why don't oysters donate to
charity? Why don't?

(56:02):
Oysters. Donate Oysters.
Donate to charity, Let's have it.
They're shellfish, a skeleton. The white is the skirt to fight
because he doesn't have any guts, Yeah.
There we go, we got 2 for one. 2for 1/2 for one.
I wish, I wish it was. There's an an e-mail that I
received sometimes like dad jokeof the day.
I'll receive it sometimes. Yeah.

(56:22):
And those are really funny. These are stupid.
I just looked them up. But yeah, there's this thing
like dad jokes of the day onlineyou can sign up for.
And sometimes they just kind of squeeze ads in there too, but it
just gets to your e-mail. And they have like lots of funny
dad jokes. And they also have like, this
there wasn't there some other YouTube videos I saw like it's
two guys saying dad jokes to each other, face off.

(56:43):
Those are really funny too. Yeah.
Yeah. So.
There's a lot of them. They're sitting on the on the
dock, like those ones where they're sitting on the dock.
Together, those are good. Yeah.
Yeah, the ones I said are not that good.
So you gotta, if you wanna satisfy your dad, do something.
Like that for fun one time you and I.
Yeah, yeah. You guys like the dumbest?
Like yeah. Yeah, I tried to find a dirty 1
chat. It was like content policy
didn't want me to say we. Had one on our last episode

(57:06):
that's gonna gonna check that box.
Yeah, yeah, that's good. We.
We. Get the heat brought.
Sometimes we talked. One from like two or three
episodes. Ago too.
We talked a little bit about your sponsors.
Is there anybody else you wanna plug Shout out?
I mean, shout out to my mom, shout to my wife, and she's
doing an amazing job right now. And my son, obviously, he

(57:28):
doesn't understand yet. Maybe you'll see this later that
one day. Absolutely.
Yeah, yeah. That'd be pretty cool.
Be a good sign for you guys to just little be still.
Around. So yeah, let's go.
Let's go I'll be Jack factory elevate foods, IVBAMA bio lab.
These are my sponsors. You can check my Instagram alt 1
V 87 on Instagram avbodybuilding.com my website.

(57:49):
I got twitch Antoine via on my twitch.
I I started streaming yesterday again, video game stuff, but I
also do this will be interestingfor some of you guys were maybe
struggling with the mental health and or addiction every
Friday or Saturday, but usually it's every Friday around like 9
PMI do a Ant one anonymous on YouTube live stream where I'm

(58:10):
going to go on there and for about 30 to 45, maybe an hour,
I'll do like I'll share about myrecovery, you know, like we just
talked about it earlier, like some of that.
But then there's the live chat so people can come and TuneIn
and there's they can ask questions.
They can ask questions and I canhelp them out.
And obviously I'll only answer with my own experience, you

(58:32):
know, the strength and hope, butI don't tell them what to do.
I can give suggestions, right, But people have to want to
figure it out for themselves. But if they have a question
about they can always answer with my own experience.
So I want to do that to just give back.
You know, obviously doesn't get a lot of views and traction
because it's it's not flashy, right We'll.

(58:53):
We'll get the boys to put that up there though, for sure.
That's a big deal. It's called anonymous every
Friday, 9:00 PM on my YouTube channel, youtube.com/anton Vaya.
And you just go once it's live, you'll, you hit the bell, you'll
be notified. But if you once it's live at
around 9:00 PM Eastern Time, I'll, I'll be there.
And, and I, I, I read some, sometexts and I, you know, talk

(59:15):
about how it relates. So even if people don't really
talk and ask a lot of questions,I can just ramble on for for a
while. As you, you know, I don't have
problem talking on the microphone.
But yeah, so that I think it's good that that's a good thing
that I do that I don't do it formoney or just for like it's
mostly for. People.
Community. Yeah, it it's also The thing is,

(59:36):
it also helps me because they said the program that you can
only keep what you have by giving it away, which means if I
want to, if I want to keep my recovery, I got to give it away.
So he closes the loop of the program giving back, you know,
spraying the message to the still suffering addict or still
suffering person doesn't matter.So and girls can go on there
too, that there's a few girls onmy on on the chat.

(59:58):
And because addiction knows no boundaries, doesn't
discriminate. If you're black, white, if
you're a woman or a guy, that doesn't matter.
Addiction will will get to you. So they were it's like it's all
it's almost like the enemy of myenemy is my friend.
So if the enemy is addiction. Well, everybody who's suffering
from that, it's like we're all together, you know, trying to

(01:00:19):
overcome it and we can all help each other and we can do that.
Friday night at 9:00 PM Eastern Time on my YouTube channel.
That's amazing, man. Yeah.
Appreciate that. Awesome.
This has been good. Yeah, pleasure having you, man.
Yeah, no problem. Thank you.
So appreciate your time. Appreciate your honesty.
Yep. Thanks man.