In this episode, we explore the evolving nature of the developmental stages and how our understanding of them continues to shift as we deepen our work. We reflect on the role of pre-conscious experiences and how they shape a person’s survival strategies and defense structures, often long before language or memory are available. We talk about the importance of tracking not just what is said, but how it is said—tone, gesture, rhythm, and body language—as a way into the earlier, often non-verbal stages. We also consider how trauma can occur even in what might seem like ideal circumstances, simply through misattunement or misunderstanding, and how subtle yet persistent these patterns can be. Throughout the conversation, we keep returning to the question of how we can support people in their survival without pathologizing them, by understanding how their strategies have served them and by helping them discover new ways of being that are more connected, integrated, and conscious.
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