June 11, 2024 • 21 mins
I spent my university years serving at a local restaurant. My boss was Jillian Harris. What I can say is that I wasn't very good at the job but it did teach me a lot about myself and it did help me learn more about my super unemployable self.
What is your serving story? Share with me on the podcast. Find me on LinkedIn - Dean Horsfield.
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Episode Transcript
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(00:00):
32 jobs, 10 times being fired, and 22 times leaving under suspicious circumstances.
I am the super unemployable. Welcome to my podcast.
So today I want to talk to you about a job that I had that probably many of
you have had at some point in your life, and that is working at a restaurant.
(00:22):
I can honestly tell you that the super unemployable, 99% of the time have all worked at a restaurant.
At a restaurant of some sort, whether that's washing dishes,
cooking, serving, hosting, managing even.
I remember this one restaurant that I worked at. It's called 4th Street Rose in Calgary, Alberta.
(00:45):
Interesting fact, the person that hired me at 4th Street Rose was Jillian Harris.
None other than the bachelorette Jillian Harris, who's gone on to do amazing things.
I can honestly say she's one of the nicest, most genuine people I've ever met.
And I can see why she is so damn popular.
(01:06):
And it's really fascinating because I got this job and I actually had never served before.
It was about two months prior to getting the job at fourth street Rose that
I was supposed to start work at Tony Roma's.
I went in, did the interview you.
And the manager said to me, I like hiring people without any experience because
(01:27):
we can train them in our method.
And I thought, well, that's actually a pretty good idea.
So the day I'm going to start my shift, I'm all excited. I think at the time I must've been.
17, 18, something like that. And I had my outfit ready to go for my first day.
(01:47):
I'd read up their menu, I did everything that I could to be that really great
employee, you know, going in all gung ho to be the best Tony Roma's server I
could be, although I'm pretty sure they were going to start me in the bus boy.
And as I was heading out the door, my dad stopped me and he said,
which Tony Romas were you supposed to start work at today? And I said,
(02:08):
oh, the one on McLeod trail.
He said, yeah, that one burnt down last night.
And so I rushed over and looked at the paper because of course,
this is back in the days where you still looked at a newspaper and sure enough,
there it is completely engulfed in flames.
The Tony Romas that I just interviewed at two days prior, I called them up and
I said, heard you burnt down. And they said, yep, yep, we did.
(02:32):
I said, I'm supposed to start work there today. What should I do?
And she said, don't come in. That was the last I heard from Tony Romas.
Anyway, a few months later, I got a job at 4th Street Rose. First time serving.
And they believed I had the chops.
(02:53):
And they threw me into serving with very little training. training,
and really just a couple of days shadowing another server.
And for any of you who don't know what shadowing is, it's that annoying second
server that follows the main server around.
You've seen them. They don't really look kind of shy and scared.
And every now and then get, get thrown in front of the customer to ask questions
(03:14):
and panic and look to the other server behind them and say, what do I do?
That's a shadow server. It's used for training. And I would argue one of the
least effective ways to train somebody.
It really depends on who you shadow.
I actually think I had a pretty good person, but to be honest,
I don't remember. What I do remember was my first shift on my own.
(03:34):
I got hit with an eight person table, which doesn't sound like that many people,
but I just literally had no idea what I was doing.
And when they ordered, I wrote everything down on the paper,
went over to the computer and punched everything in.
And now again, for anybody who served, you'll know that's a big no-no with an
eight person table you don't put in the appetizers the mains and all
(03:57):
the desserts and everything all at once you are supposed to space it out put
lines or only do four people at a time into two separate tickets to not overwhelm
the kitchen i'm sure computer systems have come a long way since then like i
know that for sure but back then that's the way it was so what did the guys in the kitchen.
(04:17):
Do they took my tickets, threw them back in my face and said,
reenter the order and you've got to enter them four at a time.
And so I'm like, oh my God, I had other tables being sat and I was trying to
keep gets caught up, get drinks and all those other things.
And here I am with this ticket for an eight person table and I've got to reenter it.
(04:39):
Now, again, doesn't sound that scary, but I didn't know where anything was on the computer.
So every time I went to enter something, it took me like two minutes to find each dish.
So for an eight-person table, it was almost 10 minutes of me trying to enter this in.
I entered it in again. Apparently, there was still something wrong with my ticket
because they threw it back at me.
I'm a half an hour into dinner service and I still haven't even gotten this ticket entered.
(05:01):
The table started to get annoyed, but I assured them everything was coming.
It was all sorted. I did get the ticket in, which is great.
And when the food came out, three of the items were wrong.
So I had an eight-person table. So I had to go back and reorder those items.
The three items came out.
This time, two of them were still wrong. I went in and entered it again.
(05:22):
The two items remaining came out and one was wrong.
I probably spent four hours working on that table. And the other tables that
were sat for me were taken over by other servers.
I have never sweat so much in my entire life. And I will remember Jillian sitting
me down at the end of the shift and saying, you're going to have to fix that.
(05:44):
And she admitted to me years later that they
were actually going to fire me that day that i was so bad
at serving that they were going to fire me i don't know why they didn't julie
and i had a pretty good relationship so maybe she kind of took pity on me and
again one of the nicest people she doesn't give up on people and i've always
respected that about her i can tell you and probably every Every server out there, past or present,
(06:11):
can tell you that server nightmares are real. And what is a server nightmare?
You've probably had nightmares similar to this. You get stuck in a feedback loop.
In my server nightmares, I'm getting sat with three or four tables.
And no matter what I do, I cannot get caught up. I can't get the orders in.
I can't move. My legs are like molasses.
(06:32):
People are looking at me. Nothing's coming out. The food is cold.
It goes on and on like that and no matter what i do i cannot get orders in and
get people's food out and i get stuck in that feedback loop and it can keep me up all night.
Those server nightmares still happen to me. And I have not been in a restaurant
in many, many, many years.
(06:55):
But nonetheless, here I am at four street rows. I actually did get a little bit better.
I got so good, in fact, that I could handle, you know, eight or nine tables.
And for the most part, I didn't have to write it down. But I can say I still got orders wrong.
I think what I realized, though, that really helped me become a better server
(07:15):
was that while I wasn't really good at the whole ordering and recommending dishes
and I don't even getting drinks right,
I could develop a rapport with the customers really quickly.
And I carried that through into my entrepreneurial life. That ability to meet
somebody and in an instant suss out who they are and what matters to them and
(07:36):
find common ground. If they were into sports, I talk sports.
If they were into nature, we talk nature. If they were into travel, we talk travel.
And I really learned the power of relationship. And so this is actually why
one of my greatest pieces of advice to young people and entrepreneurs is to
travel, is to experience things, is to do things, is to try everything.
(07:59):
I've lawn bowled, I've scuba dived, I've bungee jumped.
I've traveled into, I don't know how many countries now, certainly well over
150 cities I've been to. I'm trying to learn different languages.
I watch a lot of television programs. I mean, that just dates me that I called
it a television program.
I talked to as many people as
(08:19):
I can eat different foods. I was in London once and we had goat kidneys.
The whole restaurant was fascinated that we'd order these things. We ate them.
It was actually pretty good, but I try to try as many things as I possibly can.
So when I meet somebody who's into that weird random thing, I can say,
(08:41):
I've done that. Oh yeah, I know about that. I've been there.
And all of a sudden we have rapport. And then it doesn't matter what I do.
I get the dish wrong. I get the drink wrong.
It's like your friend is getting it wrong. And you're never going to be mad at your friend.
Well, you might be, but not for something so little.
There's a really great story about a guy who gets stuck in traffic.
And the person in front of him is going slow.
(09:03):
It looks like he's on his phone. He's just beeping his horn.
Say, guy, get moving, get moving. I got to get to work.
And he's so annoyed with his driver. So finally he gets out of the car at the
next red light. He's going to just rip into this person that's in the car in front.
As he gets up to the window of that driver, he notices it's his best friend
(09:23):
from high school that he hasn't seen in three years.
They high five, they handshake, they hug, they chat in the middle of traffic.
He's totally forgotten that this driver just totally pissed him off,
cut him off, did all kinds of terrible things.
When it's his friend, none of those things mattered anymore.
And that makes sense. I mean, if you think about a situation like that,
somebody that you really like and respect, you're going to give a lot more of
(09:46):
a pass than somebody you don't.
What's that phrase? Kill them with kindness.
I try to adopt that. But again, beyond being kind, there's one thing about being
nice and that can often come across as insincere, but genuinely trying to create
a relationship or a bond with somebody.
And the sooner and the faster you can do it, the more quickly that relationship
(10:09):
develops and the more quickly you get a pass or can negotiate or can do all
kinds of different things that will benefit you and that other person, hopefully.
So at this restaurant, that's what I did. And I learned that and I carried that through life,
that ability to instantly suss out who somebody is, what was going to matter
to them, what was important and bring that to the conversation that we're going to have.
(10:35):
And so I actually really became quite good.
It was a really, really great platform for me to grow.
It actually became to the point where I was so good that if I had fewer tables,
I started to do a lot worse.
I remember one time there's only one table in the restaurant.
A few cute girls working at the hostess stand, host stand, I don't know what
(10:56):
it's called now, the front stand.
And so I kind of, you know, between serving this table, I was chatting with
them as, you know, any young kid would do.
And I remember the table at the end went straight to the comment card box.
And Jill, she went over immediately and pulled it out,
(11:16):
waltzed over to me, swinging it, saying, saying what they mentioned was that
servers should spend less time flirting with the hostesses and more time serving the table.
She thought that was pretty funny. We, we again had a good laugh about it,
but in all seriousness, you know, it was true.
(11:38):
What ended up happening was I got bored.
If I wasn't busy enough, if I wasn't doing a lot of different tasks at once,
I get bored and I need to fill my time with other things.
At some of my jobs, I would actually work on two different businesses while
doing that job just so I could keep myself busy enough.
But at a restaurant, it's a lot harder because there's really nowhere to go.
(12:01):
You can't have your phone. You're not supposed to have your phone with you.
There wasn't even cell phones back then when I worked at 4th Street Rose. This was 2001.
That's how far back we go with this story. But in 2001, there were no phones.
So you just kind of chatted with anybody that was around, especially if you weren't busy.
And I can say, is that not a sign of the super unemployable?
(12:26):
See, the employable can find ways to kill time, right?
You take an employee and you say, hey, kill some time. They're like,
gladly take a nap, read a book, read a blog, whatever.
There's a lot of things they could do. Surf the web, watch videos.
But the super unemployable immediately go to productivity.
What can I do to further my cause, to further my job, to further my future ambitions?
(12:49):
We have to be doing something. A very, very tell sign that you are super unemployable
is you have to be going at full speed, vibrating at maximum frequency to be able to be happy.
And so what that often leads to is dissatisfaction with your job.
And that's ultimately what happened with 4th Street Rose.
(13:11):
Now, it was a combination of the fact that it was actually getting slower.
It was later renamed to California Pizza Pasta Kitchen, not to be confused with
the California Pizza Kitchen, which is the much more famous chain.
I don't even know where this name came from. I'm not even sure it was associated
with any other restaurants.
They brought in a heavy hitter manager. He was kind of a joker.
(13:33):
He didn't really know what he was doing. I don't mean to call him a joker,
but I mean, he came in and he made it seem like he knew what he was doing,
but he really was underqualified, had been overpromoted.
But the restaurant kept going down and downhill. And actually,
Jill and I used to spend Sundays making cocktails at the bar and watching reality television.
(13:54):
There's the irony there, right? Jillian Harris watching reality television.
I actually know how she got onto The Bachelorette. It's a fascinating story.
I'm not even sure, you know, I'm sure she's told the story.
So I don't know if it's private knowledge, but she, she went and wrote them
and said, Hey, wouldn't you, wouldn't it be funny to have a Canadian on the show?
(14:15):
This is the story as she told it to me, or at least as I remember it,
if she's out there listening, you know, Jill, please come on the podcast. Let's chat about it.
But she told me that she wrote them, Hey, it'd be funny to have a Canadian.
And they said, you know, okay, well, maybe they flew her down.
She told them a bunch of dirty jokes. folks. They thought she was super hilarious
and gave her a shot at the, at the bachelorette.
And of course the rest is history. She did really well or sorry, the bachelor.
(14:38):
I keep saying the batch, which she did become the bachelorette,
but of course she started first on the bachelor.
She was bachelor then became bachelorette. Now of course has moved on to a whole
media and designing lifestyle empire, but good for her. And here's actually a really funny thing.
During that time, it was really slow. I, you know, at the restaurant,
we had a lot of time to watch TV.
(15:00):
And on one of the Sundays we were sitting there watching in an episode of NU TV,
which is the university television station came on and I was on it because for
a small time, and I don't think these videos are anywhere to be found,
but I did about two or three episodes called streeters.
It was kind of like Jay Leno when he'd go to talk to people on the street.
(15:22):
And I went around talking talking to people, doing interviews and asking them
questions about things and looking for candid responses. It was actually a lot of fun.
And after one episode, Jill saw me on it. And the first thing she said was,
you are going to be on TV someday.
And I can tell you, I did not ever move on to TV, but she did. And that's really cool.
(15:46):
So anyway, the restaurant is getting slower. I'm getting more and more bored and I'm losing my mind.
And I'll be honest, I don't even remember what happened whereby I ended up quitting.
I know it was suspicious circumstances because of course they always were.
There was never a time that I quit and it was just, oh, okay.
(16:09):
That makes total sense, but I really don't remember.
And I think that's the most suspicious part of all. I think I may have either
just not shown up or the place closed.
It's not like Tony Roma's fire where literally I was not fired.
There was a fire, but I think, I think it just stopped showing up.
(16:31):
There was just, it had basically become nothing.
The restaurant was so dead that there was just no more money to be made.
But I can say that working at that restaurant set me up for so much success in the future.
That first day where I had the saucer eyes, you know, my eyes were so wide,
(16:52):
you could see the entire whites around the edges all the way to the bloodshot
red that was starting to form because I was so stressed out.
I was ruining that table's evening.
And actually I should mention one of the guys from that table felt so bad for
me that at the end he put $60 in my pocket and said, don't share that with anybody
else. You had a tough enough night.
(17:14):
I can tell you that made me feel like the world. I didn't want to take it. I tried to refuse.
I felt so bad, but his kindness reminded me that, you know what?
I'm not securing cancer or world hunger or anything. think this is just a restaurant
gig and I'm taking myself a bit too seriously.
And that kindness reminded me that it's okay to screw up sometimes.
(17:35):
But what that night also taught me was that I can persevere.
There were so many times in that evening that I wanted to cry.
I wanted to quit. I wanted to run.
It was honestly one of the worst nights of my life, but I stuck it through.
And then I came I came back the next day and I did it again and I did it again
and again and again until I became really good at serving.
(17:58):
Well, again, I say I became really good. I could get most of it under control.
I did go on to work at a number of other restaurants throughout my life.
Restaurant work has helped me fund many, many times in my life.
And I can say that to all the people out there who work in a restaurant, we thank you.
(18:20):
It is a thankless, difficult job where all too easily people are willing to
criticize, but it is tough.
Enough and, and whether you do it professionally or as a, as a hold over to
your next career move, enjoy it, love it, live it. It's a great place to be. It honestly is.
(18:41):
And one of the things that I've taken away with me, I heard this in a book,
I read it in a book, but I'm actually not really sure which book it was,
but it was a hiring technique.
What a guy would do, this big CEO, very famous, wish I could remember who it
was, but anyway, way, he was going to hire somebody important hire.
He would always take them out to a restaurant.
And the reason he did that, because
(19:02):
he wanted to see how that person interacted with the service staff,
because the way that that person would interact with the service staff is the
same way they would interact with people that are working for them and around
them. And I've carried that with me.
Whenever I do a major hire, I take them out to dinner and I watch to see how
they interact with the service staff?
(19:22):
Please, thank you. Do they put their cutlery nicely so it's easy to take the plate away?
Are they thinking about the other person on the other side of that table?
And if they don't, if they're rude, that's the end of that interview.
They don't know it, but that at that point is the time that I decide that it's
not gonna happen and I'm not gonna be hiring them.
It's such a wonderful, easy way because you can ask somebody how they're gonna
(19:46):
interact with their team and they'll give you some textbook response.
You put them in a situation like that, they don't know that you're watching,
but you are, and you're going to know very, very quickly their personality and
their collaborative working style.
That's it for me, my restaurant story. I've got so many more,
so, so many more restaurant stories.
(20:08):
I've got even more funny stories to share from my time at 4th Street Rose,
but I want to leave you with this.
Being super unemployable means you are going to be employed at random jobs.
You're going to work places where people will treat you like crap.
It doesn't make it okay, but it makes it a reality. and it's only going to make
(20:29):
you stronger and more resilient.
And when you have your own company, you make the change.
You treat the people better. You lead by example.
You make sure that every single person in your organization feels valued and
that every person in your organization knows how to ensure that others feel valued.
It's that mode, modality. Is that the right word?
(20:51):
It's that modality passing on that caring for one another together that will
make you that great CEO, founder, startup person that you want to be.
And in doing that, we make the world a better place. So to you,
the super unemployable, whether you are currently working somewhere to keep
(21:13):
your funds alive, or you remember those days, we celebrate you.
And if you've got a great story, reach out to me. My name is Dean Horsfield.
You can find me on LinkedIn.
I'm the founder of 57th Street AI Marketing. That will help you find me even easier.
Reach out to me. Let's have a chat. Let's bring you on the podcast.
(21:33):
I want to talk to you. I want to hear your stories so that we don't have to
spend the entire time just listening to me.
I look forward to chatting with you all. Thank you for listening.
32 jobs, 10 times being fired, and 22 times leaving under suspicious circumstances.
I am the super unemployable. Welcome to my podcast.
So today I want to talk to you about a job that I had that probably many of
you have had at some point in your life, and that is working at a restaurant.
(00:22):
I can honestly tell you that the super unemployable, 99% of the time have all worked at a restaurant.
At a restaurant of some sort, whether that's washing dishes,
cooking, serving, hosting, managing even.
I remember this one restaurant that I worked at. It's called 4th Street Rose in Calgary, Alberta.
(00:45):
Interesting fact, the person that hired me at 4th Street Rose was Jillian Harris.
None other than the bachelorette Jillian Harris, who's gone on to do amazing things.
I can honestly say she's one of the nicest, most genuine people I've ever met.
And I can see why she is so damn popular.
(01:06):
And it's really fascinating because I got this job and I actually had never served before.
It was about two months prior to getting the job at fourth street Rose that
I was supposed to start work at Tony Roma's.
I went in, did the interview you.
And the manager said to me, I like hiring people without any experience because
(01:27):
we can train them in our method.
And I thought, well, that's actually a pretty good idea.
So the day I'm going to start my shift, I'm all excited. I think at the time I must've been.
17, 18, something like that. And I had my outfit ready to go for my first day.
(01:47):
I'd read up their menu, I did everything that I could to be that really great
employee, you know, going in all gung ho to be the best Tony Roma's server I
could be, although I'm pretty sure they were going to start me in the bus boy.
And as I was heading out the door, my dad stopped me and he said,
which Tony Romas were you supposed to start work at today? And I said,
(02:08):
oh, the one on McLeod trail.
He said, yeah, that one burnt down last night.
And so I rushed over and looked at the paper because of course,
this is back in the days where you still looked at a newspaper and sure enough,
there it is completely engulfed in flames.
The Tony Romas that I just interviewed at two days prior, I called them up and
I said, heard you burnt down. And they said, yep, yep, we did.
(02:32):
I said, I'm supposed to start work there today. What should I do?
And she said, don't come in. That was the last I heard from Tony Romas.
Anyway, a few months later, I got a job at 4th Street Rose. First time serving.
And they believed I had the chops.
(02:53):
And they threw me into serving with very little training. training,
and really just a couple of days shadowing another server.
And for any of you who don't know what shadowing is, it's that annoying second
server that follows the main server around.
You've seen them. They don't really look kind of shy and scared.
And every now and then get, get thrown in front of the customer to ask questions
(03:14):
and panic and look to the other server behind them and say, what do I do?
That's a shadow server. It's used for training. And I would argue one of the
least effective ways to train somebody.
It really depends on who you shadow.
I actually think I had a pretty good person, but to be honest,
I don't remember. What I do remember was my first shift on my own.
(03:34):
I got hit with an eight person table, which doesn't sound like that many people,
but I just literally had no idea what I was doing.
And when they ordered, I wrote everything down on the paper,
went over to the computer and punched everything in.
And now again, for anybody who served, you'll know that's a big no-no with an
eight person table you don't put in the appetizers the mains and all
(03:57):
the desserts and everything all at once you are supposed to space it out put
lines or only do four people at a time into two separate tickets to not overwhelm
the kitchen i'm sure computer systems have come a long way since then like i
know that for sure but back then that's the way it was so what did the guys in the kitchen.
(04:17):
Do they took my tickets, threw them back in my face and said,
reenter the order and you've got to enter them four at a time.
And so I'm like, oh my God, I had other tables being sat and I was trying to
keep gets caught up, get drinks and all those other things.
And here I am with this ticket for an eight person table and I've got to reenter it.
(04:39):
Now, again, doesn't sound that scary, but I didn't know where anything was on the computer.
So every time I went to enter something, it took me like two minutes to find each dish.
So for an eight-person table, it was almost 10 minutes of me trying to enter this in.
I entered it in again. Apparently, there was still something wrong with my ticket
because they threw it back at me.
I'm a half an hour into dinner service and I still haven't even gotten this ticket entered.
(05:01):
The table started to get annoyed, but I assured them everything was coming.
It was all sorted. I did get the ticket in, which is great.
And when the food came out, three of the items were wrong.
So I had an eight-person table. So I had to go back and reorder those items.
The three items came out.
This time, two of them were still wrong. I went in and entered it again.
(05:22):
The two items remaining came out and one was wrong.
I probably spent four hours working on that table. And the other tables that
were sat for me were taken over by other servers.
I have never sweat so much in my entire life. And I will remember Jillian sitting
me down at the end of the shift and saying, you're going to have to fix that.
(05:44):
And she admitted to me years later that they
were actually going to fire me that day that i was so bad
at serving that they were going to fire me i don't know why they didn't julie
and i had a pretty good relationship so maybe she kind of took pity on me and
again one of the nicest people she doesn't give up on people and i've always
respected that about her i can tell you and probably every Every server out there, past or present,
(06:11):
can tell you that server nightmares are real. And what is a server nightmare?
You've probably had nightmares similar to this. You get stuck in a feedback loop.
In my server nightmares, I'm getting sat with three or four tables.
And no matter what I do, I cannot get caught up. I can't get the orders in.
I can't move. My legs are like molasses.
(06:32):
People are looking at me. Nothing's coming out. The food is cold.
It goes on and on like that and no matter what i do i cannot get orders in and
get people's food out and i get stuck in that feedback loop and it can keep me up all night.
Those server nightmares still happen to me. And I have not been in a restaurant
in many, many, many years.
(06:55):
But nonetheless, here I am at four street rows. I actually did get a little bit better.
I got so good, in fact, that I could handle, you know, eight or nine tables.
And for the most part, I didn't have to write it down. But I can say I still got orders wrong.
I think what I realized, though, that really helped me become a better server
(07:15):
was that while I wasn't really good at the whole ordering and recommending dishes
and I don't even getting drinks right,
I could develop a rapport with the customers really quickly.
And I carried that through into my entrepreneurial life. That ability to meet
somebody and in an instant suss out who they are and what matters to them and
(07:36):
find common ground. If they were into sports, I talk sports.
If they were into nature, we talk nature. If they were into travel, we talk travel.
And I really learned the power of relationship. And so this is actually why
one of my greatest pieces of advice to young people and entrepreneurs is to
travel, is to experience things, is to do things, is to try everything.
(07:59):
I've lawn bowled, I've scuba dived, I've bungee jumped.
I've traveled into, I don't know how many countries now, certainly well over
150 cities I've been to. I'm trying to learn different languages.
I watch a lot of television programs. I mean, that just dates me that I called
it a television program.
I talked to as many people as
(08:19):
I can eat different foods. I was in London once and we had goat kidneys.
The whole restaurant was fascinated that we'd order these things. We ate them.
It was actually pretty good, but I try to try as many things as I possibly can.
So when I meet somebody who's into that weird random thing, I can say,
(08:41):
I've done that. Oh yeah, I know about that. I've been there.
And all of a sudden we have rapport. And then it doesn't matter what I do.
I get the dish wrong. I get the drink wrong.
It's like your friend is getting it wrong. And you're never going to be mad at your friend.
Well, you might be, but not for something so little.
There's a really great story about a guy who gets stuck in traffic.
And the person in front of him is going slow.
(09:03):
It looks like he's on his phone. He's just beeping his horn.
Say, guy, get moving, get moving. I got to get to work.
And he's so annoyed with his driver. So finally he gets out of the car at the
next red light. He's going to just rip into this person that's in the car in front.
As he gets up to the window of that driver, he notices it's his best friend
(09:23):
from high school that he hasn't seen in three years.
They high five, they handshake, they hug, they chat in the middle of traffic.
He's totally forgotten that this driver just totally pissed him off,
cut him off, did all kinds of terrible things.
When it's his friend, none of those things mattered anymore.
And that makes sense. I mean, if you think about a situation like that,
somebody that you really like and respect, you're going to give a lot more of
(09:46):
a pass than somebody you don't.
What's that phrase? Kill them with kindness.
I try to adopt that. But again, beyond being kind, there's one thing about being
nice and that can often come across as insincere, but genuinely trying to create
a relationship or a bond with somebody.
And the sooner and the faster you can do it, the more quickly that relationship
(10:09):
develops and the more quickly you get a pass or can negotiate or can do all
kinds of different things that will benefit you and that other person, hopefully.
So at this restaurant, that's what I did. And I learned that and I carried that through life,
that ability to instantly suss out who somebody is, what was going to matter
to them, what was important and bring that to the conversation that we're going to have.
(10:35):
And so I actually really became quite good.
It was a really, really great platform for me to grow.
It actually became to the point where I was so good that if I had fewer tables,
I started to do a lot worse.
I remember one time there's only one table in the restaurant.
A few cute girls working at the hostess stand, host stand, I don't know what
(10:56):
it's called now, the front stand.
And so I kind of, you know, between serving this table, I was chatting with
them as, you know, any young kid would do.
And I remember the table at the end went straight to the comment card box.
And Jill, she went over immediately and pulled it out,
(11:16):
waltzed over to me, swinging it, saying, saying what they mentioned was that
servers should spend less time flirting with the hostesses and more time serving the table.
She thought that was pretty funny. We, we again had a good laugh about it,
but in all seriousness, you know, it was true.
(11:38):
What ended up happening was I got bored.
If I wasn't busy enough, if I wasn't doing a lot of different tasks at once,
I get bored and I need to fill my time with other things.
At some of my jobs, I would actually work on two different businesses while
doing that job just so I could keep myself busy enough.
But at a restaurant, it's a lot harder because there's really nowhere to go.
(12:01):
You can't have your phone. You're not supposed to have your phone with you.
There wasn't even cell phones back then when I worked at 4th Street Rose. This was 2001.
That's how far back we go with this story. But in 2001, there were no phones.
So you just kind of chatted with anybody that was around, especially if you weren't busy.
And I can say, is that not a sign of the super unemployable?
(12:26):
See, the employable can find ways to kill time, right?
You take an employee and you say, hey, kill some time. They're like,
gladly take a nap, read a book, read a blog, whatever.
There's a lot of things they could do. Surf the web, watch videos.
But the super unemployable immediately go to productivity.
What can I do to further my cause, to further my job, to further my future ambitions?
(12:49):
We have to be doing something. A very, very tell sign that you are super unemployable
is you have to be going at full speed, vibrating at maximum frequency to be able to be happy.
And so what that often leads to is dissatisfaction with your job.
And that's ultimately what happened with 4th Street Rose.
(13:11):
Now, it was a combination of the fact that it was actually getting slower.
It was later renamed to California Pizza Pasta Kitchen, not to be confused with
the California Pizza Kitchen, which is the much more famous chain.
I don't even know where this name came from. I'm not even sure it was associated
with any other restaurants.
They brought in a heavy hitter manager. He was kind of a joker.
(13:33):
He didn't really know what he was doing. I don't mean to call him a joker,
but I mean, he came in and he made it seem like he knew what he was doing,
but he really was underqualified, had been overpromoted.
But the restaurant kept going down and downhill. And actually,
Jill and I used to spend Sundays making cocktails at the bar and watching reality television.
(13:54):
There's the irony there, right? Jillian Harris watching reality television.
I actually know how she got onto The Bachelorette. It's a fascinating story.
I'm not even sure, you know, I'm sure she's told the story.
So I don't know if it's private knowledge, but she, she went and wrote them
and said, Hey, wouldn't you, wouldn't it be funny to have a Canadian on the show?
(14:15):
This is the story as she told it to me, or at least as I remember it,
if she's out there listening, you know, Jill, please come on the podcast. Let's chat about it.
But she told me that she wrote them, Hey, it'd be funny to have a Canadian.
And they said, you know, okay, well, maybe they flew her down.
She told them a bunch of dirty jokes. folks. They thought she was super hilarious
and gave her a shot at the, at the bachelorette.
And of course the rest is history. She did really well or sorry, the bachelor.
(14:38):
I keep saying the batch, which she did become the bachelorette,
but of course she started first on the bachelor.
She was bachelor then became bachelorette. Now of course has moved on to a whole
media and designing lifestyle empire, but good for her. And here's actually a really funny thing.
During that time, it was really slow. I, you know, at the restaurant,
we had a lot of time to watch TV.
(15:00):
And on one of the Sundays we were sitting there watching in an episode of NU TV,
which is the university television station came on and I was on it because for
a small time, and I don't think these videos are anywhere to be found,
but I did about two or three episodes called streeters.
It was kind of like Jay Leno when he'd go to talk to people on the street.
(15:22):
And I went around talking talking to people, doing interviews and asking them
questions about things and looking for candid responses. It was actually a lot of fun.
And after one episode, Jill saw me on it. And the first thing she said was,
you are going to be on TV someday.
And I can tell you, I did not ever move on to TV, but she did. And that's really cool.
(15:46):
So anyway, the restaurant is getting slower. I'm getting more and more bored and I'm losing my mind.
And I'll be honest, I don't even remember what happened whereby I ended up quitting.
I know it was suspicious circumstances because of course they always were.
There was never a time that I quit and it was just, oh, okay.
(16:09):
That makes total sense, but I really don't remember.
And I think that's the most suspicious part of all. I think I may have either
just not shown up or the place closed.
It's not like Tony Roma's fire where literally I was not fired.
There was a fire, but I think, I think it just stopped showing up.
(16:31):
There was just, it had basically become nothing.
The restaurant was so dead that there was just no more money to be made.
But I can say that working at that restaurant set me up for so much success in the future.
That first day where I had the saucer eyes, you know, my eyes were so wide,
(16:52):
you could see the entire whites around the edges all the way to the bloodshot
red that was starting to form because I was so stressed out.
I was ruining that table's evening.
And actually I should mention one of the guys from that table felt so bad for
me that at the end he put $60 in my pocket and said, don't share that with anybody
else. You had a tough enough night.
(17:14):
I can tell you that made me feel like the world. I didn't want to take it. I tried to refuse.
I felt so bad, but his kindness reminded me that, you know what?
I'm not securing cancer or world hunger or anything. think this is just a restaurant
gig and I'm taking myself a bit too seriously.
And that kindness reminded me that it's okay to screw up sometimes.
(17:35):
But what that night also taught me was that I can persevere.
There were so many times in that evening that I wanted to cry.
I wanted to quit. I wanted to run.
It was honestly one of the worst nights of my life, but I stuck it through.
And then I came I came back the next day and I did it again and I did it again
and again and again until I became really good at serving.
(17:58):
Well, again, I say I became really good. I could get most of it under control.
I did go on to work at a number of other restaurants throughout my life.
Restaurant work has helped me fund many, many times in my life.
And I can say that to all the people out there who work in a restaurant, we thank you.
(18:20):
It is a thankless, difficult job where all too easily people are willing to
criticize, but it is tough.
Enough and, and whether you do it professionally or as a, as a hold over to
your next career move, enjoy it, love it, live it. It's a great place to be. It honestly is.
(18:41):
And one of the things that I've taken away with me, I heard this in a book,
I read it in a book, but I'm actually not really sure which book it was,
but it was a hiring technique.
What a guy would do, this big CEO, very famous, wish I could remember who it
was, but anyway, way, he was going to hire somebody important hire.
He would always take them out to a restaurant.
And the reason he did that, because
(19:02):
he wanted to see how that person interacted with the service staff,
because the way that that person would interact with the service staff is the
same way they would interact with people that are working for them and around
them. And I've carried that with me.
Whenever I do a major hire, I take them out to dinner and I watch to see how
they interact with the service staff?
(19:22):
Please, thank you. Do they put their cutlery nicely so it's easy to take the plate away?
Are they thinking about the other person on the other side of that table?
And if they don't, if they're rude, that's the end of that interview.
They don't know it, but that at that point is the time that I decide that it's
not gonna happen and I'm not gonna be hiring them.
It's such a wonderful, easy way because you can ask somebody how they're gonna
(19:46):
interact with their team and they'll give you some textbook response.
You put them in a situation like that, they don't know that you're watching,
but you are, and you're going to know very, very quickly their personality and
their collaborative working style.
That's it for me, my restaurant story. I've got so many more,
so, so many more restaurant stories.
(20:08):
I've got even more funny stories to share from my time at 4th Street Rose,
but I want to leave you with this.
Being super unemployable means you are going to be employed at random jobs.
You're going to work places where people will treat you like crap.
It doesn't make it okay, but it makes it a reality. and it's only going to make
(20:29):
you stronger and more resilient.
And when you have your own company, you make the change.
You treat the people better. You lead by example.
You make sure that every single person in your organization feels valued and
that every person in your organization knows how to ensure that others feel valued.
It's that mode, modality. Is that the right word?
(20:51):
It's that modality passing on that caring for one another together that will
make you that great CEO, founder, startup person that you want to be.
And in doing that, we make the world a better place. So to you,
the super unemployable, whether you are currently working somewhere to keep
(21:13):
your funds alive, or you remember those days, we celebrate you.
And if you've got a great story, reach out to me. My name is Dean Horsfield.
You can find me on LinkedIn.
I'm the founder of 57th Street AI Marketing. That will help you find me even easier.
Reach out to me. Let's have a chat. Let's bring you on the podcast.
(21:33):
I want to talk to you. I want to hear your stories so that we don't have to
spend the entire time just listening to me.
I look forward to chatting with you all. Thank you for listening.
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