The Brothers Grail - Episode 12 - Chapters 34 & 35

Hey there, friends! Welcome back to another wild ride with the Brothers Grail. This episode is packed with twists, turns, and a bit of divine intervention. We're diving into chapters 12 and beyond, where Jacob (or is it Israel?) and his clan navigate some seriously tricky situations.

From acknowledging the traditional owners of the lands to unraveling a foreskin scam that would make even the Trojan horse look tame, we've got it all. We'll also see how Jacob's sons take matters into their own hands, leading to some unexpected and bloody consequences.

So, grab a glass of wine (or maybe not, if you're recording) and join us for a story filled with deceit, divine rebranding, and a bit of brotherly love. And don't forget to hit that subscribe button, follow us on Facebook, and tell your friends—because who wouldn't want to hear about a good old-fashioned biblical scam?

Episode Transcript

(00:00):
The Brothers Grail acknowledges the Bindal and Wulgurukaba people of North Queensland
and the Wurundjeri people of Melbourne, the traditional owners of the land we record on today.
We pay our respects to Elders past, present and future.
We also recognise that Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islanders have been custodians
of the land, rivers and seas for at least 65,000 years and were the first storytellers.

(00:26):
Music.
Rest in peace.
Hello, hello and welcome again. Here we are, Brothers Grail, back again.
I think we're up to chapter 12. I think we're recording tonight, boys.

(00:46):
I'm Quindog. I'm your Bible reader. I will be reading our wonderful Bible.
We're still halfway through Genesis, but I'll be reading this wonderful bible
to my two nimra brothers first being
the great captain preacher hello captain what's doing
not much mate just had a week off work which
was pretty good you had a fucking week off about three

(01:07):
weeks ago probably um yeah i don't know i can't keep up i must be taking that
much leave oh you're living a living a good life um so no that's good so that
you've got no excuses you better you got to bring the energy today i can see
you sipping on a little glass of wine back there,
so hopefully you're not too deep into that bottle. No, just first glass.

(01:29):
So minimal ranting, at least for the first bit.
Maybe. No promises.
And that little voice in the background, the great Kebevan.
The one and only. Ready to chime in with the unthought of stuff that no one
else thinks of. Drag everyone through the gutters yet again.
How you doing, baby brother? I'm good, I'm good.

(01:51):
Your body holding up? No, I'm a broken, broken, old but young man.
You are a broken man. And it made me think of your sporting excavates this week,
which then made me think of, you boys may not have heard this,
but the great Graham Bevan.
He's gone to Super League, I hear. Have you heard that?
Yeah, I read it today. So pretty gutting. So the people who are listening to

(02:15):
this podcast, even though this is time indifferent, there's a reference.
There's a time reference.
If someone wants to know when and where we are, the great Graham Bevan just retired.
And also they need to know who the Graham Bevan is. It can be a secret.
Let's leave that unsaid.
Maybe they can see who can figure it out and figure out who's gone to Super League.
That's a good, yeah. So there's been a few little hints over the last few episodes.

(02:38):
We've mentioned the sport and we've mentioned the team.
And we've like, so there are for me. Surely there'll be a couple. Yeah.
So I think maybe if the, for the astute listener out there, they'll be able
to figure out who the great grand Bevan is.
And I can't even put my injuries down to wrestling a fake God or something.
You know, I didn't, I didn't wrestle Goldberg or anything, you know?

(03:01):
So that's a, that's a really good lead into a real quick wrap up of the last episode.
Episode and even though brothers grail
we both uh we all sort of messaged each
other this afternoon to say are we going to do
this and should be prepped i promised that i would prep i have not prepped so
what did we talk about in the last episode we're about to kick off chapter 33

(03:24):
so i think we did 30 31 and 32 or something last time what the fuck did we talk
about i'm pretty sure After Rachel stole an idol, they all went to the hills.
So Jacob, no, Isaac was still with, no, Jacob was still with Laban,
doing his work, and he acquired his two wives. That's right.

(03:44):
Yeah. And he took his good speckled flock, and they stole the idol and fled.
And then after Laban accused them of stealing, couldn't find anything because
she sat on top of the idol.
Because it was- And it was that time of the month. That time of the month, yeah.
And then he realized he wasn't going to go up against God. Fuck that.

(04:06):
And this was all in the background of Jacob sending waves of his servants and slaves ahead to Esau.
Oh, you gave it away. I was going to see if Kabevan forgot about the Wolfman
again, the main part of the story.
No, except for the time I forgot about it. Well, we're about to talk about SAO

(04:28):
again, so we've got to figure out if this is going to work out.
He tried to pincer attack, didn't he? Send something ahead and then he cut around the back?
Well, he crossed a river or something and ended up in the desert,
which then led him towards- And then he found the wrestling master. Crazy wrestler.
I'm pretty confident it just was God. I think it was God.
The extra evidence being that he

(04:49):
renamed he got to rename him that's
right i forgot about the renaming all right could it be
an angel because angels become in like mystical
forms like solomon gomorrah they sent the angels and so angels appear in forms
it could be but i just a vampire god sometimes too i'm gonna wrestle you i just

(05:10):
you know how egypt and other mythologies all have multiple gods,
I wish they just had the god of wrestling in the Bible,
and he'd come down and just, every now and then tested someone, you know?
That's why the harp family play him in.
You've dwelled in houses your whole life, let's see if you're worthy.

(05:34):
That's a wrestle. He wouldn't fuck with Nimrod. No. Or the wild man.
So, if we're happy and there's nothing else anyone can think of,
I reckon we're caught up.
And I'm pumped again, so that's good. You forgot now. You're like,
oh, that's right. I forgot that he was called Israel now.
Oh, that? I forgot his name. Yeah, it's Israel.

(05:57):
I'm bad with names. So, yeah. So, our wrestling man came, wrestled,
did his hit, did his, wrecked his hit. Yeah, he's crippled now.
And he's now Israel. So, we'll see if they keep calling him Israel.
Yeah, are we still in the, because at some point, using all your mapping skills,
we were in modern-day Israel.
Are we currently there? Yeah. Is that where this happened? Yes.

(06:19):
So Jacob wrecked out back to the original Euphrates, back in the original zone to get his wives,
and then they've trekked back and they are at least very close to Israel now,
or at least on the way back. So three quarters of the way there.
So on that brother's grail, let's go into Chapter 33.

(06:41):
Dirty dreams.
Now Jacob lifted his eyes and looked, and there Esau was coming,
and with him were 400 men.
So his little fucking back plan to swoop around the back of this army failed horribly.

(07:08):
It was read perfectly by Esau.
Immediately, yeah. He skirted around the other way.
Or he's already mowed through all the lines of- And they're like,
he went that way, stop killing us. Bring me more, I want more.
400 men. So he divided the children among Leah, Rachel, and the two maidservants,
and he put the maidservants and their children in front.

(07:33):
What the fuck?
This is like that in the South Park movie when they do the operation get behind
the darkie, and they just tie all the black people into the tanks when they go to war.
Except for this time, it's the helpers and the children.
It's the maidservants and the maidservants' children. Yes, that's right.

(07:54):
So he put the maidservants and their children in front, Leah and her children
behind, and Rachel and Joseph last.
Then he crossed over before them. Oh, so he then went in front. Okay.
I take it back. Oh, yep. I thought it was straight up.
Shit, cunt. Let's not forget, he wrestled all night and he's now Israel.

(08:15):
Well, he leveled up, yeah. He turned super sane. He's a changed man.
And he's got He's got busted hips, so this treks. They're going to have to go
super slow to let him go in front. Yes, they will.
He crossed over before them and bowed himself to the ground seven times until
he came near to his brother. So he must be bow walking.
Until he came near to his brother. But Esau ran to meet him and embraced him

(08:40):
and fell on his neck and kissed him.
Called it. They wept. You did.
Wept? Oh, no, I was expecting tears. It's like when he stole a kiss. It's the...
And he lifted his eyes and saw the women and children, and he said, Who are these with you?
So he said, The children whom God has graciously given your servant.

(09:06):
I actually think that should have been, The children whom God has graciously
given. Ah, fuck, whatever. I think that was Jacob.
Or Israel. Then the maidservants came near, and they and their children,
and bowed down, And Leah also came near with her children, and they bowed down.

(09:27):
Afterward, Joseph and Rachel came near, and they bowed down.
Then Esau said, What do you mean by all this company which I meet?
And he said, These are to find favor in the sight of my Lord.
I don't know who said that.

(09:48):
He's not doing a very good job. You don't want to help this A little bit of
prep work That is true I should have read this before.
Favor of the sight of my lord But Esau said I have enough my brother Keep what
you have for yourself So is Esau assuming He's just offering all of his wives and kids To me?

(10:13):
I hope so I don't want them I've got enough,
I got better ones back here. That would explain putting the servants out the front.
They're always handing over servants. Offer them first. Yeah.
Take these three. I want more. All right. You can have the second favorite wife.
I want more. Oh, shit. My favorite one's up now.

(10:36):
And Jacob said, no, please. If I have now found favor in your sight,
then receive my present from my hand inasmuch as I have seen your face as though
I have seen the face of God,
and you were pleased with me.
Please take my blessing that is brought to you, because God has dealt graciously

(11:01):
with me, and because I have enough.
So he urged him, and he took it. I really don't know what just happened.
What did he offer him? What was the gift? Yeah, I don't know.
Was it the servants? I don't know, but whatever it was, whatever it was, he took it.
He hasn't updated him on his name being Israel now yet. No.

(11:22):
I think that'd be significant enough. If I thought I was about to go to war
with you and then we did a weeping hug, I feel like changing my name would be
pretty high on my list to tell you about.
Especially decreed by the great mystery wrestling man.
Did he just accept that his name was changed? Did he fight that at all?

(11:43):
Because if you liked your name being Jacob, maybe you'd be like, do I have to change?
But now he's just known as Jacob. It's like when they're like,
and then they came across the city that was burnt.
Therefore, it was known as. Yeah, therefore, it could only be this.
Gromland or something, you know? I feel very much like a Jacob.

(12:04):
Therefore, my name is Jacob.
Then Esau said, Let us take our journey.
Let us go, and I will go before you.
So I guess that means that they're going to go for a journey maybe, I don't know.
But Jacob said to him, My Lord knows that the children are weak,

(12:28):
and the flocks and herds which are nursing are with me.
And if the men should drive them hard one day,
all the flock will die please let
my lord go on ahead before his servant i
will lead on slowly at a pace which the
livestock that go before me and the children are

(12:49):
able to endure until i come to my lord in seer a place called seer so yeah that's
nothing super and this is just one of those ones where every time they're having
these chats i just assume it's them just divvying up land and we've just taken
over another chunk of the work team onto the next mate.
All they said was, my mob are too tired to travel.

(13:11):
You go at your manly Scorchman's, you know, red man's pace and we'll mosey on behind.
At Eddard's pace. That's all I think he's saying there.
Did they explain how SL knew that they were travelling to meet them?
No. Or did he just happen to be going at the same time that they were coming? I think so.

(13:33):
Yeah just curious yeah why did sao know to
meet to intercept them and then they all just knew it was
happening or was jacob just heading back to
where sao was maybe maybe that's just what it was i
don't know yeah it doesn't say and sao said no let me leave with some uh let
me leave you fuck let me start that again no let me leave with you some of the

(14:00):
people who are with me But he said.
I don't know who this is again. What need is there? Let me find favour in the sight of my Lord.
I don't know who that was. That would have been Jake. I think so too, yeah.
Are they doing that thing where it's just like, hey, mate, thanks for looking

(14:20):
after me while I was staying at your house.
I'm leaving you some money for being so good.
Mate, no, don't give me some money. Yes. Mate, I'll sort you out here and you
sort me out there and that's what I'm getting. And then they're like,
no, no, no, don't want the money.
And they go, yeah, I insist. but no no don't do it don't do it and then they
try to hide it and then they find it and give it back to them and then yeah
secretly give him that that thing yeah they're out lighting each other like

(14:43):
they did with when they're buying the cave yeah i'll pay you no don't pay me i'll pay you,
so oh they're just swapping women out so that there's a bit more diversity in the.
You can have leah she's not as good she's got good eyes she's got nice eyes,
So, Esau returned that day on his way to Seir.

(15:07):
There are towns called Seir, S-E-I-R.
And Jacob journeyed to Succoth.
Sorry. I'm a child. T-H at the end, Dirty Cricks.
That definitely helps. Succoth.
Jacob journeyed to Succoth, built

(15:28):
himself a house, and made booths for his livestock. He's a quick worker.
Therefore, the name of this place is called Sapa.
Then Jacob came safely to the city of Shechem. And I remember that from earlier.
I remember saying Shechem.
So that's from way earlier with Abraham, I think.

(15:51):
Safely to the city of Shechem, which is in the land of Canaan,
when he came from Paddan Aram and he pitched his tent before the city.
And he brought a parcel of land or bought a parcel of land where he had pitched
his tent so he he's bought i think that's the first reference to someone buying
or owning land where they're pitching a tent,

(16:15):
I think. So the God promised them land, and this is the first evidence I can
see of them actually having some land.
Yeah. And where did he buy it from? That's a good question.
Whoever the king of Shechem was, I suppose. He went in there and bought some shit.
He bought the parcel of land. And there he pitched his tent from the children of Hamor.

(16:38):
Oh, maybe that's who he bought the land from.
Shechem's father for 100 pieces of money. You've got to let me finish a sentence
sometimes. Because the answer's right there.
Then he erected an altar there and called it El-Elu-Israel.
So, there we go. That was the end of chapter 23.

(17:00):
So, not much going on. Do you think the altar looked kind of like Goldberg?
Because of the wrestler? Yeah. Yeah, I hope so. You're mentioning Goldberg because
I don't know if everyone who listens to the Brothers Growl podcast likes the
Brothers Growl Facebook page, which you should.
Definitely get amongst it. You should be ashamed of yourself if you don't.
But I try to put photos, historical biblical photos up on the page.

(17:25):
And one photo is of the man, the mystery wrestling man, wrestling Jacob.
He looks exactly like Goldberg, the wrestler from both WCW and WWE.
And I checked it. I can confirm. I agree.
So I've just decided that's his name. It's Goldberg. Sorry, it's Goldberg.
It's Godberg. Godberg. Godberg, yeah.

(17:48):
All right, so we're happy to move on. We're going to move on to...
Music.
Now, Dinah, the daughter of Leah, whom she had born to Jacob,

(18:09):
went out to see the daughters of the land.
And when Shechem, the son of Hamor, the Hivite, prince of the country,
saw her, he took her and lay with her and violated her.
Fuck it. So that was a rape. That was quick. Here's a character.
And in the context of a world where women

(18:30):
really like i'd say most of its rape or there's
a good portion of its rate to specifically say you
can file later that's gotta be rough well that means he did it without like
a man's permission yeah i reckon i reckon there was no transaction say it was
good enough yeah i reckon he's on the money so it's only violation if the man

(18:50):
yeah not even Even, yeah,
if the woman's father or brother or someone, if they don't agree to it,
that's the problem. They didn't get a nose ring.
Not fucking on, guys. Guys, there's no trade.
It goes on to say, his soul was strongly attracted to Dinah,
the daughter of Jacob, and he loved the young woman and spoke kindly to the young woman.

(19:15):
So, Shechem spoke to his father, Hamor, saying, Get me this young woman as a wife.
He's a gremlin. He sounds pretty evil.
So, he's the one that did the violating. I think so. And now he's going to ask

(19:37):
for permission to make it legit.
What did he do? What's that saying where you beg for forgiveness? What's that saying?
To ask for forgiveness than ask permission? Yeah, that's the one.
Yeah, yeah. Yeah, ask for forgiveness.
Don't ask permission. Yeah. I live by that sometimes.
Does that sort of go with what we were saying, though, where he violated her,

(20:02):
but he loved her and talked nicely to her and wanted to marry her?
Maybe he just violated the laws.
Like, he violated her. Maybe it was consensual. Maybe violating just means having unwedded sex.
Maybe he's like an Aladdin-type character, and he's trying to get with Jasmine,

(20:23):
but he's just a street rodent you know what i mean isn't he a prince well which one aladdin,
rodent he was like a street rat arabiana i was gonna go for i can show you the world.
Inimaginable feelings a whole new world Oh, fantastic point of view We're just

(20:49):
going to do the whole thing.
No one to tell us no Oh, where to go I'll violate you All night long All right.
Hopefully that doesn't make it, but we'll see. Yeah, please.
Cut. Have you cut through this section?

(21:10):
Get me this young woman as a wife. And Jacob heard that he had defiled Dinah, his daughter.
Now his sons were with his livestock in the field. So Jacob held his peace until they came.
So he's not Israel. He's just planning a murder or a bashing.

(21:32):
Yeah, but he's waiting for his crew.
Back up. Yeah. Which, to be fair, obviously we've speculated on different options
it could have been, but if it's the worst kind of violation,
you know, understandably you'll just get a bash and crew together.
Yeah, but I'm secretly hoping that he goes to his daughter Dinah and she's like,

(21:54):
yeah, we really love each other.
Part of me just wants that to happen, and I hope he's all right about the violation,
it's just that Dad didn't know about it. But anyway. Yeah.
I'm hoping that it was just some unapproved love.
Yeah. So we'll find out. We'll see if this is unrequited. Is that what that? Anyway.
Then Hamor, the father of Shechem, went out to Jacob to speak with him.

(22:19):
And the sons of Jacob came in from the field when they heard of it.
Oh, it's brilliant. Hey, it's a brilliant. And the men were grieved and very
angry because he had done a disgraceful thing in Israel by lying with Jacob's
daughter, a thing which ought not to be done.
But Hamor spoke with saying, saying, This the soul of my son,

(22:46):
Shechem, longs for your daughter.
Please give him to her as a wife, and make marriages with us.
Give your daughters to us, and take our daughters to yourselves.
So you shall dwell with us, and the land shall be before you.

(23:06):
Dwell and trade in it, and acquire possessions for yourselves in it.
He must be rich, this dude, hey.
Yeah, I still, but like, is he pulling a scam or he's just gotten his son to go do some violating?
So he's like, bam, let's force a marriage. Look, I'm just doing it.
Like, is he doing that trick?

(23:27):
Is the son just doing, like, it hasn't answered the core question of how evil
is what's going on, you know what I mean? Yeah, we don't know yet,
do we? Maybe we'll never know.
I don't think we ever will. I think it's just guesswork on whatever the fuck.
The wording you're never going to know what exactly they
mean by it no but i think kebevin's right i don't know if you heard this loki

(23:48):
but we're just we're so primed for the scam now that we just think everything's
a scam um uh she came said to then she came she came said to her father and her brothers,
let me find favour in your eyes and whatever you say to me, I will give.

(24:11):
Seven years working on a farm.
You've got to repeat that story. Yeah, I was going to say, based upon the repetition
so far, maybe that's exactly what we're in for.
Ask me ever so much dowry and gift and I will give according to what you say
to me, but give me the young woman as a wife. I don't know how much longer my

(24:32):
throat is going to be able to put up with it.
Yeah, I was actually thinking when you started this, like, I bet you're hoping
this character doesn't last.
Well, maybe this is going to give someone later a really good,
deep, raspy, sexy voice. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.
But the sons of Jacob answered Shechem and Hamor, his father,
and spoke deceitfully because he had defiled Dinah, their sister.

(24:53):
And they said to them, I don't know who this is going to be. We.
We cannot, oh fuck, I don't know. We cannot do this thing.
To give our sister to one who is uncircumcised. That's the defiling maybe. How dare he.
For that would be a reproach to us. But on this condition, we will consent to you.

(25:18):
If you will become as we are, if every male of you is circumcised,
they don't know how to negotiate, do they?
So it's basically just, you can have her, but all your people need to chop off the tip of their dick.
Yes. That's what I'm getting so far.
But like, they could have just said convert to our religion,

(25:39):
but they had to make it a dick chopper. We need to see all of your penises.
Yeah. Right now. And we need to cut a little bit of it off. Lay them out. You dirty man. How...
So how do they know they're not circumcised already? They're like,
hey, Dinah. They asked Dinah, yeah.
What did his dick look like? Did he have a normal-looking dick or what?

(26:03):
And hopefully in there more like Dinah doesn't go like, she can't be too familiar
with dicks, hey? She was like, oh, the shaft was pretty great.
And it was bulbous and it was throbbing. A nice girth on it.
Some nice girth. The biggest one I've had yet.
Yeah, biggest one I've had yet, yeah. Yeah. What do you mean? Yeah. Diner.

(26:23):
Yeah. So they're going to go and, and cause I remember earlier,
they got right down to their slaves and whatnot and cut everyone's dicks. Yeah.
So they're going to get, line them all up, pull them out and just go. Whop them out boys.
But I also vaguely remember there was a thing where newborns had,
excuse me, had to be cut by eight, by the eight days.
So if, if they missed the cutoff, the original cutoff, you know,

(26:47):
the very first cutoff when and they cut the slaves and everyone's dick off.
Then I thought from there on, it was when you were eight days old.
So these are people who have missed the cutoff, I think. Surely there's got to be some conversion.
I guess it's them being like, it's like your way of physically,
you're showing, you're converting to the cool.
You're going to buy in. I'm having a dick job off. Yeah. Yeah.

(27:09):
Yeah, if they're ever having to do dick inspections to know if there's a traitor
amongst them, just check the dick. That's all they're going to do.
Someone walks up to each other suspiciously in the middle of the desert.
Deceitfully. And before I put my hand under your thigh and make a promise to
you, I need to see that dick. I need to see that skin.

(27:31):
Show me that lack of skin.
So become as we are if every male of you is circumcised. I forget who's talking
right now. Oh, this is the brothers.
Then, this is them speaking. Then we will give our daughters to you and we will
take your daughters to us and we will dwell with you and we will become one people.

(27:53):
But if you will not heed us and be circumcised, then we will take our daughter and be gone.
That's not much of a threat, really. It's like, we'll just leave.
Yeah, but don't forget, Shachem is very much in love.
Yeah, but they'd also get their land back. They sold them the land.
And all the work and opportunity, I think. Yeah, so this is a standoff scam

(28:19):
at the moment, isn't it? Everyone's trying to scam each other.
And their words pleased Hamor and Shechem, Hamor's son.
So the young man did not delay to do the thing. The thing, it says.
Specifically, it says, did not delay to do the thing.
And is the thing the dick chopper? He just whipped it out His blade was probably

(28:40):
sharp enough It was probably clean enough I like the word probably in there
It's probably sharp enough Fuck Four turns later this isn't working Someone give me a hand here,
Who remembers Noah Was very upset
when His sons went in backwards To covering That's right you can't see me naked

(29:02):
You can't see no dick and but all these dudes are just flinging them out like
they're all fucking like they're all at the at the piss trough for the rodeo
or something like get them out boys i'm 10 beers deep i gotta go.
You're making me remember the not fest piss trough thing not a good one that was nasty.

(29:23):
And Hamor and Shechem, his son, came to the gate of their city and spoke with the men of their city.
So these are the dudes that they want to cut the dicks off, right?
Hamor and Shechem. So they're like, oh, good idea, fellas.
So they spin around 180 degrees, go back to the gates of their city.
And they say, I think I did for Hamor like a big booming voice.

(29:46):
These men are at peace with us.
Therefore, let them dwell in the land and trade in it.
For indeed the land is large enough for them.
Let us take their daughters to us as wives, and let us give them our daughters.
Only on this condition will the men consent to dwell with us, to be one people.

(30:10):
If every male among us is circumcised as they are circumcised,
will not their livestock their property
and every animal of theirs be ours
only let us consent to them and they will dwell with us so he's just declared

(30:30):
to everyone that they got to cut their can you imagine if like your people's
you know chosen spokesman just went off to make a deal.
You're just at home Just I don't know Hammering some shit up in the house Or
you're just sweeping some stuff Or picking some fruit And the boss comes back

(30:52):
and goes Guess what everyone,
I'm picturing like the mayor of Townsville Comes back and they're like Alright
guys So we've made a deal with our neighbouring city And,
We're all cutting They whinge about the rates They whinge about the potholes
in the road Could you imagine that?
Imagine the outcry Dick chopper Alright everyone, we all need to cut a piece

(31:15):
of ourselves off No Civil unrest I would predict.
And all who went out of the gate of this city Heeded Hamor,
And Shechem his son Every male was circumcised
And they all just did it straight away All who

(31:35):
went out of the gates of his city So
they've just done it they've all just cut their dicks off could you imagine
the infections a whole town's
worth of people with infected dicks for next week they're
all limping around oh not a
productive week i don't reckon nah you have to just can all works for the week

(31:58):
two weeks and just the whole wherever all their rubbish goes is just all full
of dick skin how would you go all the fucking the working Working dogs,
just some chewing treats for the working dog.
That's when they feed the livestock for the next week.
How would you go about keeping sand out? Because is it...

(32:20):
Is it sandy at this point in time? Because they're like, yeah,
they don't have well-fitting underwear. It's just robes, isn't it?
The sand's blowing up your... Yeah.
So it's all just red, bloody, swollen, sand-covered knobs.
There's hundreds of them. Hundreds. For the ladies listening,

(32:42):
isn't that a nice picture to put in your minds?
What a weird situation. um now it came to pass on the third day when they were in pain,
that the two sons of jacob
simeon and levi dinah's brothers

(33:03):
each took his sword and came boldly upon
the city and killed all the males wait sorry
who did that the one of the two brothers dinah's two
two brothers simeon and levi so so jacob's kids yeah so in a bit of a so all
the blokes in this town like oh yeah good we'll get a trade with them let's

(33:24):
cut our dicks off boys yeah good idea good on you rip rob yeah good thinking
tim and simon and barry it was a scam.
No no it's the deal i reckon this is more of like a game of thrones situation
where there's a couple all a rogue rogue element levi and simeon the rogue brothers just scamming,

(33:51):
thirsty cersei and her brother they're these two brothers they're getting it
they're doing a bit of an incestuous love you've created a backstory now they
did a bit of an abraham remember abraham got his well-trained servants and did
a sneaky night night attack so levi and simeon are going and they're all like...
Do you remember how sore you were? Yeah.

(34:12):
We'll fucking get them. Yeah, they won't be able to hold a sword.
Their fucking dick's too sore. What a battle plan.
If they did do a raping, that was a shit deal. If that was a full-on violation of their sister...
But not every male in the whole town. They just went and murdered a whole town.
Yeah, but I'd be angry at my dad for just making a deal where they just had

(34:35):
to do a bit of dick chopping.
Yeah. Although, it's also pretty dark if the whole town has to do a dick chopping
for one dude's actions as well.
Yeah. Here's the next part.
They didn't say age. There's never any good side. They just said every male. Are they talking like?
Every male i'm i'm guessing every penis in that
fucking in that town yeah that's even if they're

(34:56):
less than eight days old oh oh see
the the technicalities captain i don't know
i don't know the rules well if it's if they're saying every male i presume if
it's three seconds old gone yeah yeah so and they killed hamor sorry who was
hamor the dad yes so the rapist dad yeah So the king or the owner of this village.

(35:21):
The mayor of the town. The daughter, if the daughter's worthy of ever being
mentioned again, her reaction to the death of the raper might indicate what
actually went down, you know what I mean?
Yeah, whether she is regretful or whether she's... Yeah, if she's angry at her
brother for what they've done or whatever, that might indicate some of what went down.

(35:45):
Well, we've got about three or four little bits before the end of this chapter,
We'll see if they cover any of that or whether, classic to the Bible, the woman gets ignored.
We'll see. Yeah, they just move on. We're done with this story now. They took over the land.
They got all the women. They got all the livestock.
Success. But they forced the dick chopper and then killed them anyway.

(36:06):
They killed them anyway.
How rude is that too? Like, cut your dicks off and then wait till you're in pain.
While they were still in pain. That's just such a big, awful move.
Hey, this is such an alpha move.
All right, boys, get in there and chop your dicks off.
And all the while knowing you're going to just go in there and fuck them up anyway.
Mate, you reckon the brothers were the ones that were like, Oi,

(36:29):
Dad, you know what we could get them to do? Get them to do a dick chopping.
Classic Levi move, that one.
So, they killed Hamor and Shechem, his son, with the edge of the sword and took
Dinah from Shechem's house and went out. So, Dinah must have still been there.
Well, they sold her for a dick chopping.

(36:50):
Oh, so you reckon. They did the dick chopping. So, that was part of the deal.
Okay. You get our sisters and we get your sisters.
Yeah. So, they did the deal. They said, here you go, Dinah. Off you go.
So, then she got taken. And they honoured the deal. They gave the girl away,
but then they killed and took. And then they came and stabby stabbed. All right.
If one of the brothers is into Dinah, I'm going to be pretty upset. If one of her brothers?

(37:11):
Yeah. I wouldn't be shocked. No, not with all incest, no.
The sons of Jacob came upon the slain and plundered the city because their sister had been defiled.
They took their sheep, their oxen. It's always about getting more livestock,
hey? Their sheep. And women.
And women. Their sheep, their oxen, and their donkeys. What was in the city

(37:36):
and what was in the field.
And all their wealth, all their little ones and their wives,
they took captive. There it is.
And they plundered even all that was in the houses.
Then Jacob said to Simeon and Levi, You have troubled me by making me obnoxious
among the inhabitants of the land.

(37:58):
That's a fucking understatement. Among the Canaanites and the Parasites.
And since I am few in number, they will gather themselves together against me and kill me.
I shall be destroyed, my household and I.
But they said, Should he treat our sister like a harlot? You see,

(38:19):
harlot again implies...
Maybe not a forceful, violent act. Maybe like a, but I don't know.
Like, we don't. End chapter.
So that's where that one is. Mic drop. Yeah. So my lack of preparation actually
made it better for me because I didn't see that coming at all.
I dead set was thinking that was the happy ending. They were like,

(38:43):
Dick Chop, we've doubled our flock, you know?
Yeah, we've made friends. We've grown.
What do you call that? Diplomacy. This is diplomacy between the- And I was like
a little bit sideswiped when they just went in for a minute and two people took out a whole town.
Yeah. Well, they had the dicks. They couldn't concentrate.

(39:03):
That's some John Wick shit, that. It is. They were in recovery,
mate. They could barely walk.
With their dick, with their sand filled. Oh. Wounded. Scraping the sand off the end of it.
Israel was a bit whiny there at the end, wasn't he? He was. He definitely was.
Oh, you've taken over this town for me and killed all of the men and brought

(39:25):
me all this women and livestock, but you've made it difficult for me? Yeah, basically.
Did he basically say, yeah, you've made me a little bit richer,
but not rich enough to protect myself from the really rich people?
That's basically what he's saying.
What he was saying is when we scam kids, we don't do it with blood because then

(39:49):
they want to come get us we scam people with trickery I was about to say it was a lesson in scamming.
Fucking hell. I just love that we thought a scam was coming,
and then when I got lulled into a sense of, like, oh, they didn't scam.
They scammed! They scammed!
If in doubt, it's a scam. It's a quingo.

(40:17):
It's a quingo.
Hello there, Brothers Grail Meat Sacrifice. It was unfortunately at around about
this time that either the great Kebevan or Eli the Schmoodle,
who had been diligently keeping Kebevan company,
bumped the mute button on Kebevan's microphone.

(40:39):
Therefore, the rest of this episode shall be known as Kebevan in the background
of Quingod's microphone.
Hopefully, we don't miss out on any of Kebevan's cuttingly insightful comments.
So, let's rejoin the Brothers Grail just in time for...

(41:03):
Chapter 25.
Then God said to Jacob, it's been a while since we've heard from God.
I just... No, he was Goldberg.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. But we've just gone through two chapters. It was when he was
sleeping and had a dream about ladders and then made a pillow.
No, no, no. It was Goldberg.

(41:23):
No, no, no. Yeah, that was God. Oh, okay. Yeah, okay. Oh, Godberg.
Godberg. Yeah, it was Godberg. But the last few chapters, that was all about
the cutting off penises and whatever.
I don't think God got into any of that. So anyway, welcome back to God.
God said to Jacob, Arise and go up to Bethel and dwell there and make an altar

(41:46):
there to God, whom appeared to you when you fled from the face of Esau,
your brother. Is he trying to shame him?
He said fled, but I thought they just made a good deal and embraced and did
a bit of weeping together.
I didn't hear a fleeing. I think he's talking about the original.
Oh, that's gone back a bit far. That's like 20 years ago. Is it?

(42:09):
Oh, you're right, it was too.
He's had a whole other adventure since then. Yeah, God has been God a while then, hasn't he?
And Jacob said to his household and all who were with him, Put away the foreign gods that are among you.

(42:31):
Purify yourselves and change your garments.
Then let us arise and go up to Bethel, and I will make an altar there to God,
who answered me in the day of my distress dress and has been with me in the
way which i have gone i don't know meat sacrifice let's hope well do you reckon

(42:55):
the garment change is just a secret way to check on the circumcision.
Okay guys just everyone's gonna do a mass garment change
together all dickless all
crutch holes crutch holes all around everyone we've prepared
a special garment for you all to wear to the the meat sacrifice you're
gonna come in one by one and we'll change the clothes

(43:17):
for you and do a bit of a dick inspections everyone chaps
i figured you were just saying change in front of
everyone you weren't going for like a specific garment
no just one mate just forced them
all to change in front of him oh sorry i
thought there was a specific garment that allowed

(43:38):
for the penis inspection that's what i don't know it's like
you've got to wear the special meat sacrifice robe or.
Whatever but you're going to change it to your normal clothes to wear the robe
and yeah during that moment that's when you do the dick check okay all right
all right now i'm on board all right luke style with mortis you were up front

(44:00):
yeah i'm just thinking biblically biblically
mate you are so they gave jacob
all the foreign gods which were in their
hands and all the earrings which were in
their ears and jacob hid them under the terebinth tree
which was by shechem and they journeyed and the terror of god was upon the cities

(44:23):
that were all around them and they did not pursue the sons of jacob so i guess
that's how they're explaining how levi by...
Green and tenacity. Yeah. So God protected them.
So, Jacob came to Luz, and it says in brackets, that is Bethel.

(44:44):
So, Bethel. Bethel is also Luz? It just has like four names. Yeah.
Which is in the land of Canaan, and all the people who were with him.
And he built an altar there, and called the place El Bethel,
because there God appeared to him. He just brought another name.
He just added El to the front of it.

(45:04):
So, you add a ham to important... Men at the end of the name and important places,
you add an L to the front of it.
I was going to say, could it be like a suburb? It's like it's part of Bethel,
but it's also known as El Bethel because that's the city center.
North, south, east, west or something. Yeah.
Because there God appeared to him when he fled from the face of his brother.

(45:29):
Now, Deborah, we never learned this before, but Deborah is Rebecca's nurse.
I'm assuming the one that got given.
Rebecca is Jacob's mum. Is that right? Yes. Yes.
She's back. Yeah. Rebecca's back. Kick-starting. The main scam leader.

(45:53):
Jealous of all the wives. Oh, she might. Yeah.
Because she was teaming up with Jacob.
So this is Rebecca and Jacob coming back together. together now deborah rebecca's
nurse died hey i just want to point out earlier you said hey,
sometimes you're just gonna let me get through a sentence but you you also distract

(46:18):
yourself all the time and i don't remember if you just did it then but you do
it no good call i think i literally did exactly that.
Deborah, Rebecca's nurse, died. And she was buried below Bethel,
under the terebinth tree.
So the name of it was called Alon B'chath.

(46:39):
Did they just tell you someone's name for the first time to tell you they died?
I think so, yes. And then name a place for it?
And the name of the place was completely unrelated to the name of the nurse.
Is that, did they not just mention before that a whole bunch of dudes swapped
earrings and then they buried them under that same tree?

(47:02):
There was something about earrings. It said, so they gave Jacob all their foreign
gods. So this must be all Jacob's servants and shit.
And Jacob said, give up all your foreign gods, if you remember.
So it says, they gave Jacob all the foreign gods, which were in their hands,
and all the earrings, which were in their ears, and then Jacob hid them under the tree.

(47:23):
Yeah. So it was like the god idols. Yeah.
In my head, right? In my head, I'm making this up, But the earrings for their
gods were the equivalent of the circumcisions for Jacob.
And he's like, taking away the circumcisions.
He's like, you're mine now. You don't get to have the earrings.
I think Jacob's already circumcised all his dudes.

(47:44):
So, yeah. No, his dudes now have no earrings or dick skins.
So, hang on. Are you saying that the circumcision and the earring is kind of
like a branding for your flock?
Flock yeah just like they they pick a thing to do to someone's body that controls
them and indicates and and jacob's people just have to flop their dicks out to hey mate guess what.

(48:14):
I'm with i'm with jacob and the other guys just have a very visible hearing
but jacob took them away yeah that's just
my yeah personal thought that i've come up with just now all right i dig it
when when you start your own religion captain which you know who knows what
that means but when you start your own religion maybe you can introduce that

(48:37):
as part of your thing who don't i don't know it might be planting some ideas
here i don't know anyway Anyway,
so Deborah, she died.
They called some place. Because she died, they called it Alon Bekath, whatever.
Then God appeared to Jacob again, and he came from Paddan Aram and blessed him.

(48:59):
So God has just been hanging out in Paddan Aram for some reason.
And God said to him, your name is Jacob. So God was not the wrestler.
No, because he would have known his name was Israel. Surely. Idiot.
Who's a mystery wrestler? There's a random angel that wrestles people.
Is it an angel that God doesn't agree with?

(49:21):
Because you can't just be going and renaming Abraham's name,
people. He didn't even use Ham.
Yeah, we should have known. Jacob Ham. If it was Jacob Ham. Yeah. It's Ham. Yeah.
Okay, so we still have our mystery wrestler. God, no.

(49:44):
Your name is Jacob. Your name shall not be called Jacob anymore,
but Israel shall be your name. What the fuck?
Do it, this guy. What is going on?
We need to let you finish sentences.
But why did he do it again? we

(50:05):
missed the key part that the bible just repeats itself over and over again of
course they'd just retell the story of him getting an A we weren't really happy
with the wrestler we thought it wasn't clear enough that it was God so we'll
just have God come back to him and just re-effort you know what happened?
They kept writing for another few chapters and went fuck we forgot his name

(50:28):
is fucking Israel we've got to fucking put this back how do we do it?
God will just jump in and they'll just
tell him again yeah just tell him again yeah because
we know that six thousand years from now the brothers grail are going to be
talking about this and they're going to be going who was that wrestler was it
really israel did this actually happen so we need to reaffirm if it was a better

(50:54):
told story it would have been like he's like am i known as Jacob?
Why am I Why is this mystery man If he had some confusion going on and then
God came and was like nah mate Yeah you're definitely Jacob Boom.
That would have been good. Yeah if God had come in and gone Where is he?
Your name is Jacob but if you recall the wrestler from a few nights ago that was me.

(51:21):
He's trying to do scams he's just not very good at them ha ha ha,
He's trying to make them a prank rather than a scam, but no one gets the joke.
So he's just not very fun. He's just learning on the fly.
Like, once again, if you throw it right back, he said to Adam and Eve,
if you eat the apple, I will murder you.

(51:42):
They ate the apple. I'm going to kick you out of here.
So he just keeps cocking it up at every turn. I name you. I'm going to turn
up and I'm going to wrestle him in the desert.
And then I'm going to declare his name's Israel. What do you reckon, guys?
Yeah, good idea, God. Good idea, God. And then he does it. And then Jacob's
like, yeah, g'day, fellas. I'm Jacob.

(52:04):
No, you're Israel. I need to make this stick. Like when I tried to chain my
name to Kramer, it just didn't work out.
I just thought of something pretty wild. Turns the whole Bible on its head.
So you know how Eve ate the apple? Apple, do you reckon if she'd eaten one of
the previous helpers, some of the meat, done a bit of a meat sacrifice? What?

(52:28):
Because you know how there was the other animals before Eve existed?
Yeah. But if she'd have done a meat sacrifice instead of Apple,
reckon God would have been like, mate, I like women instead of meat.
That would have been amazing. Yeah, imagine that. If the serpent was like,
hello, Eve, there's an apple. whole shunk, head cut straight off. Yeah.

(52:52):
If she was doing meat sacrifices, I reckon God wouldn't be the weird meat pervert that he is today.
I reckon if she'd have just done the right thing from the start.
That would be amazing if that happened. If only. If only.
You're not Jacob anymore, so he called his name Israel. And God said to him, I, God Almighty.

(53:14):
I nearly said Almighty. multi i am god
almighty be fruitful and multiply a
nation and a company of nations shall proceed
from you and kings shall come from your body the land which i gave abraham and
isaac i give to you and your descendants after you i give this land repeating

(53:39):
that all the stars in the sky I promise is what that was.
Just, yeah, just the same thing again. Yeah.
And I give you all the land that I gave to two dudes, but they never got,
but he said, did he say Kings? You provide you Kings or something?
Yeah. I think he said the same thing to the others as well. I think it was,

(54:01):
I think it was all the same promise. It started out as stars.
Yeah. And I think it was sand on a beach at some point of sand in the desert
at some point, maybe anyway.
Then God went up from him in the place where he talked with him.
So Jacob set up a pillar. His name's Israel.

(54:22):
Yeah, the Bible immediately forgot. Like we did, because it's not a very good name change. No.
It doesn't have ham on it. It just didn't add the ham.
So Jacob set up. But someone who sounds like this, he can't have a ham.
Yeah, that's true. So Jacob set up a pillar in the place where he talked with

(54:45):
him, a pillar of stone, and he poured a drink offering on it, and he poured oil on it.
And Jacob called the name of the place where God spoke with him,
Bethel. How many times have they named this? Or are there heaps of Bethels at this point?
Then they journeyed from Bethel. And

(55:06):
then there was but a little distance to go to Ephrath Rachel laboured in childbirth
and she had hard labour Now it came to pass when she was in hard labour That
the midwife said to her Do not fear,
you will have this son also And so it was,

(55:29):
as her soul was departing In brackets, for she died.
That she called his name Ben-O-Ni.
Like, what's the Star Wars dude? Ben... Obi-Wan Kenobi.
What's his name? Ben Kenobi. Yeah, so Ben-O-Ni, Ben Kenoni.

(55:51):
But his father called him Benjamin. So Rachel died and was buried on the way
to Ephrath. That is Bethlehem.
Rachel was his good wife. That's the one he wanted, wasn't it?
That's the weeping kiss wife. It is, yeah.
And she still gave him a good chunk of sons, including Benjamin.
Yeah, there was a few before and now Benjamin, yeah.

(56:13):
Which, by the way, is this the first woman dying from a birth?
Maybe. I think it might be. Maybe. They've mentioned it being not a good time
because that's a punishment from God that you have to feel pain and it has to
be awful. Well, we know it's because of Eve.
Yeah, because she's a bitch. because she didn't do the meat sacrifice.

(56:35):
Exactly, right. And, and...
Yeah, I forget where I was going with that, to be honest. Good point, Captain.
Did I take that really good, well-worded sentence and interject with,
I looked up what Bethel means? Oh, yeah.
This is going to wreck a lot for you guys. Is this going to give away future
shit? No. Okay, cool. Okay, good. So in Hebrew, the meaning is house of God.

(56:58):
Okay, you're right. The reason why it's everywhere is because they're making house of God.
So they're just building house of God over. Is it just a church, basically?
Yeah, where are you going? Is that the shrine? You know how he's like, go make me a shrine.
Is that what a Bethel is? Go make me a Bethel. Go make me a shrine.
There's a boulder. Yeah. Maybe that's where Bethel came.

(57:20):
Could be too. It also says house of El or house of God. So El might be.
Ooh, that's the El Bethel. That's super extra. All right.
So Rachel just died and that's now Bethlehem.
So Bethel. sorry i remember where i
was going with my rant that got a bit off track is this kid

(57:41):
benjamin is going to be super special because she
died during like the chosen weeping
wife died all right yeah
so he's got his his tent for
his mom gonna be pretty depressing he's gonna
be the mummy's boy as well then israel

(58:02):
so now they call him so they call it was like god named
him israel then he then they rent out jacob and
now they're back to israel again then israel
journeyed and pitched his tent beyond the tower of
edah and it happened when israel dwelt in
that land that reuben went and lay with
billah his father's concubine combine you

(58:27):
added so much more like surprise into
that yeah like it is surprising yeah but i
bet you they just meant that to be a normal thing maybe you were
just supposed to gloss over that but it is a big deal well well it says and
israel heard about it full stop now the sons of jacob they're jumping between

(58:48):
two like i have trouble keeping track of people as it is oh because they're
They'd still fucking weirden up the Jacob-Israel naming system.
Yeah, in the same sentence, or in the sentence right beside each other.
So it says, now the sons of Jacob were 12.
The sons of Leah, so you can count these on your fingers if you really want,

(59:08):
You don't have to. The sons of Leah were Reuben, Jacob's firstborn,
and Simeon and Levi, who were the two crazy pre-k. Yeah, the murderers.
Judah, Isaac and remember Zebulon.
So they were Leah's. And then the sons of Rachel were Joseph and Benjamin. So she only had two.

(59:33):
The sons of Billa, which is who? Was she the maid?
She's the one that... So, Billa is one of the mums. And who banged her? Israel?
Reuben went and banged Billa. So, is this like his... So, the sons of Billa were Dan and Neftali.
And the sons of Zilpah, who is the other maidservant, is Gad and Asher.

(59:59):
So, Reuben, Leah's dude, banged Billa or whatever.
Oh, he's a fucking madman. So he's probably 20-odd years old now.
Well, actually, probably more, because Leo was at least 21 years ago. No, only 14.
I don't know. I don't know. Yeah, the age thing is still always going to fuck

(01:00:20):
with us, I think. And they just age skip laptops. Yeah.
But how weird is that? You're banging some of your brother's mum.
It'd be step-mum style. Oh, there's definitely some porn out there that talks about that, eh?
Yeah. The other porn didn't exist. I did look it up.

(01:00:43):
Not shot. These were the sons of Jacob who were born to him in Paddan Aram.
Then Jacob came to his father Isaac at Mamre or Kirjath Arba.
That is Hebron where Abraham and Isaac had dwelt.
So Isaac, who I think we thought died after the- He's still kicking.

(01:01:03):
He's just been kicking around eating stews and shit. Nobody had savoury meals.
You reckon every day he's just like, I fucked up my blessing?
It was technically probably the most important thing for his life.
Yeah, he's going, I had one to give, only one, and I fucked it.

(01:01:26):
And my fucking wife scammed me out of it.
Sorry, did we get an update on her before, but it wasn't really an update,
or did she just disappear?
No, I was mate dying. all of a sudden was her mate died yeah she died i've been
so excited for the return of rebecca,

(01:01:46):
oh fucking hell i could just picture the conversation every morning like rebecca
brings isaac his meal and he goes oh yeah what are you feeding me this time
can i trust you this time let me have a feel i want to see who this is Is that
really you or is this Jacob again?

(01:02:08):
Now, the days of Isaac were 180 years.
So Isaac breathed his last and died and was gathered to his people being old and full of days.
And his sons, Esau and Jacob, buried him. How sweet.
So there's Isaac done in a very low-key way. That's fitting.

(01:02:30):
I never said he went to that place that they bought them. No,
you're right. I don't think he deserved more. I think he got more than he deserved.
Like, I thought an off-screen death was worthy of him.
Can we recap Isaac's life? So, Isaac was the son of Sarai.
And Abraham. And Abraham. Then she died.

(01:02:53):
He had nothing to do with going and finding Rebecca.
He just stayed at home and meditated in the field. Do you remember?
Then she came back, and he immediately just went and got to know her in Mummy's tent.
And then all of a sudden his kids are parents and he got scammed.
Oh, no, he nearly got murdered on the mountain. That's the only other thing

(01:03:13):
he did. Didn't he go back around and re-dig all the wells?
Oh, he did dig some wells. He went around and re-dug some wells that had been filled in.
You're missing the key part of when he was a child, his father took him up for
a sacrifice, but then it wasn't a sacrifice.
It was just God punking him.

(01:03:34):
Yeah abraham the the moral man made his
son carried the like the sticks that he was
going to burn him on up the mountain and the
knife and whatever else and the flame didn't i know isaac abraham carried the
flame but because he because he wasn't just gonna the sacrifice wasn't gonna
be just like come up behind him and just do a quick slit the throat kind of
action he was gonna burn him it's a full yeah full process and remember he goes

(01:03:57):
father why don't we have a goat Remember that?
Yeah. Isaac, actually a pretty tragic story when you think of the betrayal of
his father, his wife, and his son. He probably had trust issues.
I would imagine a lot. Major trust issues after Abraham.

(01:04:18):
So no wonder he was feeling his son going, oh, you can't be lying to me. Yeah, of course.
Oh, fuck. Anyway, so that was the end of Isaiah. So SCL didn't really live up
to his Scottish aggression, I don't think.
He lived up to his. He could have easily taken anything he wanted. He just didn't care.

(01:04:39):
Yeah, and he rocked up his 400 men, but then he's like, I'm going to kiss you on the neck.
And cry. Weep. And weep.
They would have been manly tears, though. They would have been. Yeah.
He did get some women out of it. He got to do a bit of a woman trade, I think.
Did he? I thought that's what they were doing. You have some of my servants.

(01:05:03):
I'll have some of your servants.
Let's say he did. Yeah, let's say he got some more women. Because he was the
one that ran off to... Because mummy... Remember mum Rebecca,
who didn't like SAO, didn't like the harlot women of some other mob.
So SAO ran off to that. That zone got married two or three of the women just

(01:05:23):
to spite mum. Fuck you, mum.
I'll marry you however I want. Yeah. So, oh, that was fun. I enjoyed that.
Any takeaways, boys? Are you feeling a little bit more spiritual?
No. No, I'm a little bit. The twists in this episode have been pretty good.

(01:05:46):
Yeah. I feel like I'm watching a thriller. At this point in time.
The foreskin scam was quite the twist. Yeah. Yeah.
But it's still the same thing where it does something pretty shocking,
but doesn't really stay around with it for very long.
And then they just got to walk away, stop free, and have a sacrifice or whatever

(01:06:07):
the fuck they did. Because God protected them on their escape.
They weren't scared of God.
You could write a whole book on doing a foreskin scam and, like,
that being a... You could write a whole book on it.
Well, like, you could build up to, oh, my God, everything's gone wild.
Our people have just...
Chopped off our dicks, and now we're being murdered. That's like the peak of where the action is.

(01:06:33):
You've got at least four or five chapters of them walking around with their
sore dicks in the book of the Borskin scam.
What was the raper guy?
He just chopped off his dick, and he's like- Immediately.
We could just learn something about him. Oh, mate, they chopped off our dicks.

(01:06:55):
What if they come and get us? Maybe he's a bit paranoid about what the brothers
might do. They were pretty aggressive earlier.
None of that. They're just dead. Next day. Next chapter. Next line.
Next line. Yeah, you could pad out a dick skin. What is it called? I think you could.
Dick skin scam? A dick skin scam book.

(01:07:16):
The dick skin scam book. I'll put it to you guys. What do you think is a better
military tactic, right? You've got the dick skin scam, where you get them to
cut their dicks and then while they're all sore and sorry, you slaughter the bitches.
That's the bard did that one. That's the bard.
Or we've got the Trojan horse, where you give them a gift of a horse and they

(01:07:37):
let you into their city to slaughter them.
I think they're on par. This movie should be as big as Troy.
I don't know who you get to play the brothers. The Trojan foreskin. The Trojan foreskin.
Look, we're cool, guys. Just cut your dicks and we'll be brothers and sisters and trade.

(01:07:57):
Ah, it's a scam. There's a movie in there somewhere.
I agree. Well, to nip this in the tip, we might close this one out.
Thank you, Brothers Grail. That's been fun. To the listeners,
because I don't know how to do this properly, but listeners,
do the subscribe button on the Spotify's and on the podcasts.

(01:08:19):
Podcasts, jump on the Facebook page, tell a friend, tell two,
tell three friends, convince them to get a dick snip.
We're already calling them a meat
sacrifice. You're trying to tell them to chop up their bits now, mate.
No, convince someone else to. I'm not telling our favorite people to,

(01:08:42):
because the people who are already listening, they're our favorite people.
The ones who aren't listening yet, they need to earn their spot.
Okay. so anyway we're talking shit it's been fun I promise that I probably won't
prep next time either it's been Brothers Growl by Captain see ya mate by Kebevan peace,

(01:09:04):
Quindog out.
Music.
Out out,
I gotta fucking do that shit.