Do you find yourself keeping score in friendship? It goes something like this… “I went to her kid’s birthday party, but she didn’t come to my kid's party!” “I scheduled the last brunch meetup, so it’s HER turn to plan something!” Or, perhaps you catch yourself saying, “After all I’ve done for her?!”
Are you laser focused on reciprocity in your relationship? If so, it sounds like you have a transactional friendship.
While it’s reasonable to expect our friends to celebrate important days and milestones with us and to give as much as we give, reciprocity shouldn’t really be the goal in friendship. Instead, let’s aim for transformational friendships.
Transformational friendships help us grow and evolve as individuals. In these relationships, we dig a bit deeper - beyond the give and take - to offer a bit more of ourselves. Perhaps we offer a skill that only we have, a favor that a friend really needs, a word of encouragement so a friend can keep going, maybe a prayer. Perhaps we lovingly offer constructive feedback or carefully worded advice - all designed to help a friend grow. Will we get what we offered back? Maybe, maybe not. Still, we do it out of love.
Join Stewanna Dasari and me for a conversation about transformational vs. transactional relationships.
After the show, head to the Women, Friendship, and Community Facebook group to share your thoughts.
*BE A GOOD FRIEND!*
Would you like to hear more from Stewanna Dasari? Check out the episode below.
Would you like to hear examples of transformational friendships? Listen to these episodes:
37 | GIRL! You Tripping! How a Friend’s Honesty Helped My Marriage - featuring Alicia Matthews
13 | Somebody Prayed for Me - And Those Prayers Got Through! - featuring Ashley Smith
9 | Faith-Building Friends - featuring Theresa Johnson
Let’s Be Friends!
Facebook Community: bit.ly/thefriendshiptourpodcast
Email: ccurtis@thefriendshiptourpodcast.com
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