How Our Careers Impact Our Families, by Jonathan H. Westover PhD

Abstract: This article explores the intersection between professional careers and personal family life, focusing on how demanding jobs can both positively and negatively impact children, and what organizational leaders can do to promote healthier integration. The pressures of constant high achievement in many industries are discussed, and how an overemphasis on work can negatively affect children's development if parents are unable to detach. Research is presented showing issues children of overworked parents may face. However, moderate parental involvement is also shown to benefit children by serving as role models of a balanced life. The article advises practices like sharing work appropriately with kids and involving them in age-appropriate ways. Additionally, how exposure to career difficulties can build children's empathy when explained constructively is covered. The conclusion emphasizes the interconnection between work and family roles, and the responsibilities of leaders to cultivate cultures supporting well-being, flexibility and balance for all.

Episode Transcript

How Our Careers Impact Our Families Abstract (00:00):
This article explores the intersection between professional careers and personal family life,

(00:08):
focusing on how demanding jobs can both positively and negatively impact children,
and what organizational leaders can do to promote healthier integration.
The pressures of constant high achievement in many industries are discussed,
and how an overemphasis on work can negatively affect children's development if parents are unable to detach.

(00:31):
Research is presented showing issues children of overworked parents may face.
However,moderate parental involvement is also shown to benefit children by serving as role models of a balanced life.
The article advises practices like sharing work appropriately with kids and involving them in age-appropriate ways.

(00:51):
Additionally,how exposure to career difficulties can build children's empathy when explained constructively is covered.
The conclusion emphasizes the interconnection between work and family roles,
and the responsibilities of leaders to cultivate cultures supporting well-being,
flexibility and balance for all.

(01:13):
As working professionals with families,the demands of our careers often place strains on the important relationships in our personal lives.
However, it is also true that our roles at home deeply shape who we are at work.
Today we will explore the intersection between our professional and private spheres,
focusing on how our careers can affect our children both positively and negatively,

(01:38):
and what we as leaders can do to achieve a healthier integration.
The Pressures of High Achievement Throughout my consulting work with various organizations,
one recurring theme I often see is the pressure to constantly perform and achieve placed on employees,
especially those in management roles (Heslin,2005).

(01:59):
While the desire to succeed is understandable and often necessary in fast-paced industries,
an overemphasis on results can come at the cost of one's well-being if not kept in check.
Specifically regarding family life,the norm of being constantly "on" and achieving more can negatively influence children if parents are unable to detach from work.

(02:22):
Research shows that children of parents who work long hours tend to experience more emotional and behavioral issues (Crouter,
1984;
Davis, Cobb, et al.
, 2012).
They may feel neglected and lack the attention,quality time and emotional support critical for their development (McBride et al.

(02:46):
, 2005).
Parents themselves are more likely to experience higher stress,
poorer physical health,work-life conflicts and relationship problems if proper boundaries are not set (Allen et al.
, 2000;
Greenhaus & Beutell, 1985).

(03:06):
Set expectations.
Leaders must make clear to employees that while high performance is valued,
a balanced life is also important for one's well-being and that of their family.
Unrealistic targets or an "all or nothing" mentality should be avoided.
Lead by example.
Management should model the behavior they want to see by not being constantly reachable after hours themselves unless absolutely necessary.

(03:34):
This sets the norm that detaching from work for family or personal time is acceptable and respected.
Be flexible.
Allowing more flexible work arrangements like working from home,
adjusted schedules or occasional leave can help employees better integrate their professional and private responsibilities without sacrificing productivity or commitment.

(03:57):
A career should not come at the cost of one's personal relationships or well-being.
As leaders,we must carefully examine the organizational culture and mindsets we cultivate,
and make the necessary changes to prioritize balance for all.
Parental Involvement and Role Modeling On the other hand,
being professionally engaged and ambitious parents can also have positive spillover effects on children if done in a balanced manner (Carlson et al.

(04:26):
, 2011).
When parents are moderately involved in their careers,
children tend to develop higher self-esteem and see their parents as role models who balance multiple life domains successfully (Hoffman,
1989).
This parental modeling of having an interesting career one is passionate about,

(04:48):
while still being present in other areas of life,shapes a child's understanding of what an ideal life can look like.

Some benefits observed include (04:56):
Children of working mothers are more likely to view careers and achievement as important parts of life themselves (Corrigall & Konrad,
2007).
Daughters in particular tend to have higher career aspirations and educational attainment when mothers work and have more egalitarian gender role attitudes (Barnett & Baruch,

(05:19):
1987).
Children develop a stronger work ethic from seeing parents work diligently at jobs they find meaningful (Hoffman,
1989).
Parents' job autonomy,complexity and opportunities for learning and growth can create a stimulating home environment that aids a child's cognitive development (Hoffman,

(05:42):
1972).

To optimize this positive influence, some practices I advise include (05:44):
S hare your work life.
Discuss projects,challenges,career visions and passions with children in age-appropriate ways so they feel part of that important domain.
Involve them appropriately.
Bring children to supervised workplace events or activities where possible to pique their interest and exposure.

(06:09):
Set a good example.
Let your work be guided by strong ethics,positivity,
perseverance and collaboration to instill key values.
When approached intentionally,parental careers can positively shape children by serving as role models of a complete,
purposeful and balanced life.

(06:30):
Building Empathy through Adversity One final way our work lives intersect meaningfully with raising children is in helping them develop empathy through exposure to our experiences with difficulties at varying career stages.
Witnessing a parent cope with challenges such as layoffs,
job searches,failures or workplace discrimination can aid children's emotional intelligence later in life (Hoffman,

(06:55):
2000).

Some benefits include (06:56):
Children learn resilience by seeing parents persevere through adversity with optimism and grace (Luthar et al.
, 2000).
They gain awareness of real-world issues like bias,
lack of opportunities or economic hardships others may face (Gregory & Milner,

(07:17):
2009).
Exposure to challenges in safe doses as a bystander builds compassion by allowing children to experience others' distress vicariously (Hoffman,
2000).
Of course, it is important that such exposure does not cause undue stress on children.
But when handled empathetically by explaining issues at age-appropriate levels,

(07:42):
it can aid character development.

Some ways to approach it (07:45):
Be honest yet positive.
Share career setbacks transparently while remaining hopeful and solution-focused.
Normalize difficulties.
Let children know challenges are natural parts of growth rather than personal failures.
Connect to learning.

(08:05):
Discuss lessons learnt regarding grit, networking, alternatives explored to find silver linings.
By tapping into how their parent’s career journeys are shaped,
children can build invaluable socioemotional skills to navigate adversity with compassion themselves later on.
Conclusion It is evident that the professional paths we forge do not exist independently of our roles as parents and family members.

(08:32):
While demanding jobs can negatively pressure relationships if not balanced well,
engaged careers also offer children inspiring role models of purposeful,
multi-faceted lives when approached intentionally.
Further,exposing children constructively to our experiences with workplace difficulties builds their resilience and empathy muscles.

(08:55):
As organizational leaders,we have a responsibility to cultivate cultures where high performance coexists with well-being,
flexibility and a mindset of balance.
And as working parents,we can maximize the positive impact of our careers on our children through open channels of communication,
age-appropriate involvement and translating life’s challenges into lessons of growth.

(09:19):
When our work lives and family lives are integrated smartly,
both domains stand to be enriched significantly.