February 12, 2024 • 61 mins
In this special episode of The Light Show at Victory Church, Avery Morrow unveils his uplifting journey of faith through life's trials. Raised in a family with its own share of hardships, Avery navigates through personal struggles, searching for his identity, and strengthening his faith in God. This episode offers valuable insights and real-life experiences to anyone trapped in their own turbulent times, desperate to find light amidst the darkness.
From pursuing a law career driven by desire for societal approval to undergoing an identity crisis, Avery's story takes a seismic shift during the wake of the COVID-19 pandemic. Avery's transition from societal validation to seeking God's approval uncovers the path to inner peace and security. This episode delves into the issues of identity crises in the modern youth, underscoring the necessity for our self-concept to be anchored firmly in God and to receive HIS affirmation as our heavenly Father.
Avery's extraordinary encounter with God's love helps him emerge victorious against depression. Watch as he surrenders to God's will, pursues discipleship in Egypt amidst uncertainties, and ultimately basks in the invigorating revelation of God's love. Expressing his deepest emotions through a heartfelt letter to God, Avery invites us to his transformational journey, our divine purpose is successfully unraveled through surrender and faith.
Finally, Avery shares how his relationship with God bridged the gap of human fatherlessness, leading him to a pivotal realization of his deep worthiness in God's eyes. Discover the profound transformation of a young man from confusion to divine enlightenment, providing powerful encouragement for your own spiritual journey.
Whether you're entangled in an identity crisis, seeking your purpose, or longing for divine love, this episode promises to guide, inspire, and uplift. Tune in and learn how you can bask in the profound love, acceptance, and validation that God cherishes us with through Jesus Christ our Lord.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:02):
Welcome to The Light Show at Victory Church, Grand Prairie.
We pray these testimonies build your faith, strengthen your heart,
and help magnify the presence of God who is with you right now through faith
in Jesus Christ, His Son.
The Light Show is also available to watch on YouTube. Just search for Victory Church, Grand Prairie.
You can also join us on Instagram, Facebook, and TikTok for regular encouragement
(00:24):
in your walk with the Lord.
And now, let there be light.
Well, good morning, everybody.
We're so glad to be able to do another round of The Light Show with our special
guest, Avery Morrow, today.
You have some deep things to share today that I think are going to be super
helpful, and I'm excited about that. Yes, I'm excited too.
(00:48):
We're going to dig in. But let's just pray before we go. Lord,
we thank you for this day.
We thank you for the opportunity to shine the light, Lord, to declare what you
have have done, who you are, who you are in us and through us, God.
And Lord, I thank you for Avery today. I thank you for his heart for you.
I thank you for his passion for life and for purpose and the identity that you've
(01:09):
placed within him as your kid.
And Lord, I thank you today that you lead us where we need to go.
We thank you, Holy Spirit, that you work in our hearts as we receive,
Lord, each person who hears this, whether live or on podcast or on YouTube,
whatever means you choose, God, I thank you that it ministers to their hearts.
Lord, your love, your presence, your light transforms us.
(01:31):
And we thank you for that today, God, in Jesus' name.
Amen. All right. So tell us just a little bit about yourself for anybody who
doesn't know you. Okay. So hi, I'm Avery. Nice to meet you.
I, uh, hey, David. I play bass most Sundays.
I was born in 2002. So that's pretty recent.
(01:53):
Yeah no i think i was born into
a christian family though it was not
perfect but i was for my
parents divorced which is you know it's something i had to deal with of course
it's not like the worst thing that can happen to a kid it's pretty bad but through
that god definitely worked and showed himself and i think because of that my
(02:18):
relationship with god is somewhat stronger stronger than it would have been.
So simple statement, I always ask whoever we're interviewing ahead of time,
who is God to you and how important is his presence in your life?
God is the father I never had.
And the importance, I can't even measure it.
(02:39):
He is so influential and in everything that I do, I hope to glorify him.
Like he's just, he's changed my life.
It is true that like you live on fire for God, which I think is a really cool thing.
And it's a beautiful statement, especially for somebody who's young.
You didn't have to fall all the way down a well to dig yourself back into a place of relationship.
(03:03):
You have lived a relatively positive life.
Relatively. Relatively. You're not perfect. No. But I mean, a lot of people
probably, we have this thing that we do in church. Somebody's going to share their testimony.
They should have done really bad things or there should be like some really big story to tell.
(03:24):
Like I pre-interviewed you. We didn't dig up a lot of skeletons in the closet.
It's the grace of God that I didn't have like a huge fall off and then come back.
Yes. So that's not me. That's God.
Yes, precisely. And what a gift, right? To be able to have.
And we've talked before and you said, you know, some of the things that you're
grateful for is that you hit certain internal bottoms before things were blown up.
(03:48):
Like you found bottoms sooner.
At one point, like life, like everything was kind of just like going down.
I tried to figure everything out on my own and then it failed miserably, thankfully.
Which I say thankfully because if I didn't fail so soon, I probably would have
just like coasted and been like kind of lukewarm for forever.
But God let me fail so that he could show himself to me.
(04:11):
So your failures are not as bad as you think because God's going to use those.
So true. So let's walk through a a little bit your story.
You mentioned briefly your parents divorced when you were little. Yeah.
Fairly traumatic situation. I mean, there's, you know, not always,
there's always something that causes those situations. And so we don't want to like bag on anybody.
(04:35):
But as a kid, there were voids in your life.
Voids in parenting as far as a dad figure in your life.
I know you've been blessed with some really good men in your life,
though. You got your grandpa and your Uncle Kelly and Simon.
You got some good guys speaking into your life.
You got some mentors even now that are speaking into your life.
But one of the things that I think is interesting is that, and again,
(04:56):
we're not going to get into details of your early childhood,
but there's a lot of people that go through things early on and that becomes
the sticking point of their life.
Like that is everything I I live comes out of that place.
And it sounds like in your early development, kind of your like junior high,
those middle spaces where you could have chosen like everything is about,
(05:18):
a broken home or whatever, you really leaned into God and you were involved
in church and worship team and whatever.
Tell us a little bit about that. Well, like what you should know is that,
I mean, I'm not ripping on my dad at all.
I love him. You should too, right? God loves him.
But for the majority of my life, he was completely absent.
Emotionally, a lot of times he just was never there. So I grew up with this.
(05:43):
I grew up with the burden of me thinking, oh, I have to figure this out on my
own. I have to learn how to be a man on my own.
Thankfully, guys like Uncle Kelly, like you mentioned, and Grandpa,
they were there and they poured a lot into me.
But there was this absence in my life and I couldn't quite fix it on my own.
I was involved in church and I, you know, I pursued God.
(06:06):
You know, I was pretty involved, but I never really dealt with the damage that was done at this time.
Yeah. Just try to keep a game face. Do life.
I was just like, this is just what I have to carry and I think we'll make it.
Yeah. But that, I hope you know you don't have to live like that. Yeah.
And did you feel like you had to start not strive, but like,
(06:30):
were you conscious of not being like your dad?
Was that a concern? One of my biggest fears at the time was ending up like my dad.
Because I saw the damage that was done to myself and to my siblings and my mom and my family.
And the last thing I wanted was to pass that on to my family.
(06:51):
And I didn't know how to deal with that because I know I've got these wounds.
But I'm like, how do I shoulder this so I don't pass it on?
And I'm like, I don't know how to do that. So I was very scared of that. Yeah. Yeah.
And it's a weird thing because it's kind of a spiritual tie that can happen
where we, you know, because of what we've experienced in the lives of people
(07:14):
around us, we can be so bold to be like, I never want to be like that.
I never want to be like that. I never want to be like that.
And kind of, it's a measure of judgment and we end up tying ourselves to a behavior.
Like I have to produce something. I have to be a certain kind of person because
I'm not going to be like that.
And it actually is a sort of bondage, isn't it? Like it's a heavy weight.
And like the lie the enemy says is like, oh, you're going to be just like your dad.
(07:36):
Like, just like he was like his dad and his dad was like his dad.
You're going to end up exactly the same way.
Doesn't matter how hard you resist. And like, I kind of believe that for a little bit.
And as a result, I was like, I built a shell around myself and I'm like,
I'm not going to let anybody get this close because I don't want them to see this, right?
I don't want to hurt them too, you know? So, and part of that drove you to stay away from him.
(08:02):
Like you shared with me the, the way the court system works,
you're supposed to, you have to show up in person as a kid to say,
I don't want to be with my dad.
Yeah. So like mom was in this court battle with dad.
And as kids, we're kind of like, we're kind of just like in the middle of it.
And it was like, it was years of court, but the, in middle school,
(08:23):
most of the time, like we, we would, during the week we'd be at mom's house.
And then on the weekend, we were supposed to go to dad's house,
but as kids, we had the option to stay home.
I just chose to stay home because I'm like...
I don't want to end up like this. I don't see this as beneficial.
And I honestly, at the time, I didn't really like the guy. I'm being completely
(08:44):
honest. I mean, that sounds bad to say. Sounds fair. But I was pretty resentful.
So we would go to this exchange, they called it.
And it was just some third party person that worked for like a child service company.
We'd get into their car. We'd drive to a parking lot.
They'd roll the windows down. Dad would be there. we'd say hey
(09:05):
dad no i don't want to go this week then we have a quick small
talk chat and then we we'd go back and i
usually always stayed home brook and caden often which
are my siblings if you don't know they they
often went and i would stay home and of course i'm like that's just a part of
life i'm kind of used to it when brook and caden would come home it was i love
(09:30):
them it was turmoil in the house because now they're dealing with all the the
the the emotional stuff that just came from dad's house, and they're bringing this back home.
And I'm just watching this happen because I've removed myself,
I kind of get a little bit of perspective.
So I was seeing all this damage that was happening. I'm like,
I don't know how to deal with this. Yeah.
(09:52):
And I think it's interesting, like, the situation that you're describing,
our court system does the best that it can, but it's a little messed up.
Yeah. Yeah. Well, family stuff is so messy because it's like,
oh, he said, she said, like, what is actually going on here?
And my dad, he believes a lot of lies.
So it's really hard to filter out what is truth in that kind of setting.
(10:15):
And as kids, like, you don't know what to believe. You assume every adult's
telling the truth. So that's not to say, oh, woe is me. God fixed me.
But this is where I came from. Yeah.
And I think it's a good thing to say because when we talk about,
again, testimonies and it's like, oh, what was the big of your life?
(10:36):
And we look for these like crazy catastrophes, but we're living in a society
where over 50% of marriages break down in our nation.
It's crazy. So, honestly, the majority of kids going through our school systems
are dealing with situations like this.
Parents, some are able to deal with it better than others. But essentially,
there is a generation that has come up going, who am I? And what's of importance? Where am I going?
(11:01):
As far as I know, and I'm not the most knowledgeable person in here,
I'll do my best. Bring it.
The role of a father is to bring their kid up into the world and say,
yeah, you're strong. You can do this. I do love you.
And you have a place to come to whenever anything goes wrong.
Like, I love mom's story about grandpa.
She said, grandpa told her that you can use me as a scapegoat anytime.
(11:26):
And that kind of safety that you find in a father was completely absent in our lives.
But that is the role of the father. And like, honestly, like the more I grow
up, the more I see, oh, the father is supposed to do this too.
I don't have this right now. And then God's like, gotcha, boom.
Yeah. So for you, you're the oldest sibling.
(11:50):
Yes, I'm the oldest of three. Now four. Now four.
So you took on responsibility internally, right? Yeah. You're the man of the
house. I thought I was, yeah. I thought I was.
That's a lot to carry as a 10, 11, 12-year-old, right? Yeah,
like, don't worry, Mom, I got it.
Yeah, it's a big deal. So you were in church.
(12:13):
I mean, obviously your mom, your family did a great job of making sure that
you knew God, that you were in the house of God, that you had a foundation.
You go through middle school relatively easily. You get to high school.
High school yes i think like if you're in high school right now you know exactly
what i'm talking about we're like everything at you is like trying to grab your
(12:36):
attention and you don't really know what to do you don't know who you are and
you're trying to figure out all these questions and,
you just kind of almost like paralyzed with all this noise and for me i was
just like well i could could just, I mean, my buddy's kind of cool.
Maybe, maybe I'll just like hang out with them. And like, you become like the
(12:57):
people you hang out with, right?
So I was hanging out with... He's quoting scripture. Quoting scripture.
I read my Bible. Don't worry.
You become like the people you hang out with. And I found myself turning into
somebody I didn't really like in high school.
Like it was, I mean, it was on the football team and just kind of involved in stuff.
(13:18):
And I found that I was as one person with my friends and then another person
at church. So I'm sorry about that.
But I kind of watched myself fall into this.
I'm like, well, I guess this is who I am. This is where I fit in.
Even if it's a manufactured version of myself.
This must be who I am with this group of people. This is what people approve
(13:42):
of you when you're like this.
Yeah. Well, I play football. I'm doing pretty good. This is who I am. This is good.
The thing is, like you say, you know, if you're in high school,
honestly, that's, it happens in the workforce.
Oh, absolutely. There's 30, 40, 50-year-olds that still have different lives.
Here's my church life and here's my regular life.
Yeah. And it's exhausting balancing that. Oh, absolutely. Absolutely.
(14:04):
And like part of it, I think, is like, where are you putting your identity?
Like, for me, I kind of put my identity and oh, I'm like, I'm pretty decent
at music and I'm a decent football player.
That's who I am. I'm a football player who can play music. That's me.
Yeah. And when then high school ended and football was no more, it's like, oh, what now?
(14:26):
Who am I without that? Who am I? Yeah. Which we hear a lot of people that,
you know, even go through high school, even junior college or whatever,
and they're, they feel like they have, well, they've been told they have like
really great skills in sports or whatever, and then have an injury.
And it's like, well, who am I without football, without volleyball,
without whatever? I have no future anymore.
Right. So I thought, okay, well, I don't, I'm about to graduate at this point.
(14:48):
And I'm like, okay, I need to do something productive with my life.
Right? I need to make something happen. I I know I've got something in me.
I just don't know what it is. I'm going to shoot my shot and see what happens. Yeah.
So I thought, well, I wanted to be a lawyer at the time.
I'm like, I've got decent grades. I'm sure I'll be able to get in.
So I applied to two schools. I applied to, because for law, you need an undergrad
(15:11):
and then you need to go to law school after that. So it's seven years.
I'm like, this sounds noble. I like this.
People are going to compliment me when I say I'm going to be a lawyer.
And they did. They did. And you were also processing it with God at that time, right?
Because after graduation, you started reading the Word, digging into that.
So you're not like just yahooing. I did miss a bit.
(15:32):
Yeah. So before I'm thinking about law, it was Christmas in grade 12. So this was 2020?
Yes. Yeah, it was 2020. And then a grandpa were up and I was given a small little
devotional book, How to Adult.
I think it was called Adult. No, Auntie gave that to me. Yeah.
Yeah. And I was reading this and I'm like, oh, this is pretty good. This is pretty good.
(15:54):
And I was like, oh, this, and then I got to like day five. I'm like,
this is like starting to change my life a little bit. We're still on Christmas vacation.
Talking with grandpa, just like,
families around. And I started to read my Bible a little bit more.
And I'm like, well, this is pretty good. There's some good stuff in here.
And I kind of noticed like my step got a little bit lighter and my, I just felt better.
(16:20):
Right. It was a subtle shift.
Yeah. And then Christmas break ends. I go back to school and it's been a couple
of weeks and my buddy's like, Avery, you haven't weren't at all in the last
couple of weeks. I'm like, oh, I didn't even notice.
They're like, yeah, it's okay. You can say it, man. Like, just say it right
now. I'm like, no, I'm good.
(16:41):
I'm good. But yeah, I love that because to me, it's the, it's like such a good
example of we try so hard to not do stuff, but honestly, our best move is to
start doing stuff, right?
Start doing what God wants us to do. And the other stuff just gets gross and drops off the backside.
Side yeah we're focused on what we shouldn't do when you when you're
filling yourself up with god everything else kind of just falls out totally
(17:02):
so it gives you a good launching point
by the time you graduate they're like okay i'm i'm like i'm pretty pretty solid
i think yeah and then at this point you know i kind of started like slipping
back into old old habits and things you know because you're part of that friend
group i mean they aren't bad guys i love them if you're watching Hey, Ashton, how's it going?
(17:26):
No, great. Good guys, but definitely had some habits.
And now I wanted to be a lawyer. I'm like, this pays good.
I like what people, I like people when they say, I like it when people compliment
me on this. I feel like this is my purpose to do this.
That's huge. And what, so let's just suppose you tell somebody,
somebody church comes up to you, what do you think you can do after school?
(17:47):
Oh, I'm going to go to school and be a lawyer.
And their response is, Whoa, that's awesome. We need more Christian lawyers.
Yes. You betcha. I'll make that happen.
Instant what we would phrase as validation.
Absolutely. Instant validation because you have made a good choice.
You have value. You're somebody now that we can get behind.
(18:08):
Exactly. I'm like, this is pretty great. This is a good cause.
So I applied to two schools.
I applied to a business school and an arts school school because my counselor,
my school counselor said, Oh, you should apply to the one you want and a backup
one that you're guaranteed to get into.
I was not accepted into the business school. And I'm like, Oh, that, that sucks.
So, but I was accepted into this bachelor of arts degree. Like right on.
(18:33):
Look at this useless degree that I can use to get to the law.
It's like a, it's like a back road to get into the thing that you want.
And I'm like, this is great. This will work out. I'll just power through these
four years of intensive study, intensive useless study.
If you're in an arts degree, I'm sorry. It's just not for me.
Yeah, it's very good for some people, but it's a challenging degree.
(18:57):
Definitely not for me. It's not my speed.
But I have plans to move to Calgary and study.
And that summer I'm working and I get an email. And it's the U of C saying,
oh, hey, by the way, all of your classes are online i'm like
oh shoot because this is the covid zone
this is right like we're like fourth or fifth wave of
(19:18):
covid at this point and i'm like man that that sucks and like i kind of felt
god to say don't go which i immediately shoved aside because i know i have to
be a lawyer because some people validated that right and then i was already
like committed to an apartment with with my buddy.
And I'm like, I feel obligated. Like I have to go because I have to make this happen.
(19:42):
This is who I'm going to be. Right. And then uncle Kelly, at that point,
I think he was walking in the house and he's like, Avery, did you pray about it?
I'm like, no.
Yeah, I prayed about it, uncle. Yeah. Yeah. I prayed about it.
I did not pray about it because I was scared that God was going to say,
no, Avery, don't go. Because I kind of already knew he was going to say that.
(20:03):
So I went. I went to Calgary and studied in my Bachelor of Arts in Law and Society,
which sounds fancy, but it's basically just a sociology degree,
which if you don't know, is pretty easy.
Sociology is useful, I guess. but anyways I
digress the I got to
(20:25):
Calgary I got my apartment got everything moved in got my laptop open now I'm
about ready to do four years of online study in my little apartment bedroom
and it was actually the most lonely time in my entire life because you're an
extrovert anyway like you somewhat extroverted yeah you like people maybe a little bit yeah Yeah,
maybe just a little bit.
(20:47):
And it was, I like what, like I could feel this, this vision of who I thought
I was supposed to be kind of slipping away.
So it was horribly lonely. I was horribly depressed. And I'm like, who am I supposed to be?
I don't know. Now I'm stuck with all these actual bills and actual groceries
and actual rental insurance and all the things. Yes.
(21:08):
Now I'm studying a useless degree and I'm running out of money and I'm completely alone.
I'm just trying to find something that I can grasp, something that I can hold
on to, something that I know is solid, right?
Eventually, I cut my losses. I'm like, I'm dropping out. This is not worth it.
This is a waste of time, especially when all the professors are like very anti-God
(21:32):
and it's subtly written into everything.
Thing yeah but i was falling
into like some addiction and it was just like a super low
point super low point in my life and i
was running out of money i'm like i gotta go get a job i gotta go get a job
and i'm like if you've ever had if you've ever been depressed you know it's
(21:53):
like a cloud you can't see past three feet in front of you you have no perception
of time like everything it just feels like everything's getting smaller and
more compressed until you're completely isolated.
And COVID doesn't help with that. It does not help. No. So I got a job shoveling
snow because I know I'm capable of shoveling snow.
(22:13):
And this is an interesting thing because this is a go back to where you've been
kind of moment, which is so typical.
When we are in distress, we go back to what we know. We go back to what's familiar.
What's familiar, what we've had success in in the past.
So this is exactly where you go as a kid.
Parents, Lawrence, you're going to be impressed by this. But as a kid,
you had a serious snow shoveling job.
(22:35):
Yeah. So when I was a kid, I was not old enough to work at a job.
I'm like, I need to make money so I can, I just wanted to, I just wanted to do stuff.
So I'm like, I started a snow removal business in the winter and then a lawn
care stuff in the business.
And I had like regular clients and they would pay monthly and then I would shovel
their snow every time it snows.
(22:55):
So I really hoped it didn't snow and I got as many people on the contract as possible.
But like, I was like, this is pretty awesome. I'm running a business.
I've got clients. I've got schedules. This is going great.
I was pretty proud of myself. I think it's pretty impressive, really.
So when I found myself in this identity crisis later on, I'm like, what is what do I know?
(23:16):
I could shovel snow. That's what I can do. I'm pretty good at that.
Such a Canadian answer. So good.
And that job, it was a job. It only added to the isolation and the depression
because now I'm sleep deprived because you have to get up at like two in the
morning to go shovel snow in downtown Calgary.
You're working with the type of people who choose to shovel snow for a job.
Nothing against them. But it's just, it's a rough crowd.
(23:40):
And if they're watching, hi, you should come to Jesus. He loves you.
I'm usually the one that offends people. You just go for it. You just knock it out.
Let's keep it serious, guys. This is serious. I'm in the middle of this identity crisis.
I'm falling back on what I know is familiar. I'm like, I'm just going to shovel snow.
(24:02):
Eventually, I'm like, this is not sustainable. Yeah. So I'm like, what do I do next?
Yeah, and I love you had said that because it was like, maybe I'm a this.
Maybe I'm a football player. Maybe I'm this. Maybe I'm that. Maybe I'm a lawyer.
Maybe that's who I am. And then you go like in this depressive state,
you're like... Because none of it lasted. It all kind of like was fleeting.
(24:25):
So like, who am I now? Nothing works.
Like a lot of people, they put their identity in what they do and who they think they are.
But what I was doing was I was putting my identity in what I thought I could be.
Right. And the problem with that is like it just keeps shifting. Yeah. Right.
Okay. So identity is a big thing for you. Oh my goodness. You're passionate about this topic.
(24:46):
So, can you explain your sense of importance on identity?
The importance of identity is very important.
Very important. Because everything you do flows from your identity, right?
If you say to yourself, I'm a healthy person, that's part of my identity,
(25:06):
you're going to eat healthy and you're going to go to the gym because that's who you are.
But if you say, oh, I'm unhealthy, I'm just never going to be able to have a
six-pack and biceps and all the things, then you'll never have a six-pack or biceps.
And you'll just be like, oh, another extra large pizza.
(25:27):
That's who I am. So it can be positive, it can be negative.
But I guess even if you put your entire identity on being healthy,
that's not healthy either.
Exactly. The reason why identity is important is because everything you do flows
from that. Yeah, totally.
So I was thinking about this too, that we really need to lean into like Psalm
(25:49):
139, verse 16, for you form my inward parts, you knitted me together in my mother's womb.
There's got to be a place of like, there is an actual reason that I'm here.
Like that verse, the psalmist is like, there's a God who made me.
So in our culture, we're...
There seems to be a big question mark as to whether God exists or not.
(26:09):
Suddenly we're chasing all these things, all the outside, whatever.
That particular verse, it has huge implications, like knit you together.
And then you like take a biology class in high school and you realize like the
detail of one cell is more complicated than like an F-16 fighter jet.
It's like how, like, it's not just cell by cell. It's like atom by atom that
he put you together, right?
(26:30):
So if he put all this effort into making you physically, how much more effort
did he put it into making your character and who you are on the inside. Yeah.
So I think when you're like, when we know that that's truth and you throw 18,
19 year olds at like, what are you going to do with your life?
What's your whole life about? What? No kidding. It's pressured up, eh?
(26:51):
No, it's, it's, it's a lot of pressure. I mean, of course, I mean,
keep the pressure on them because they need to figure this out,
right? You can't just let them coast.
Well, okay. So I wrote down one of your other quotes. You said, apathy will kill you.
Apathy will kill you. So this is it. You're like, the pressure has to be on
because if you just don't care, apathy is life-sucking.
My generation, we've almost accepted apathy as a virtue.
(27:15):
And that is horribly destructive because then you're placing your identity in
the absolute nothing. Yeah.
Thank you. Thank you. There you have it. So there's like people around us in all age groups,
but particularly your generation, like this
this group that's kind of coming out of high school and the first few
(27:38):
years of university right now that seems to be this
yeah you're you're in the middle of like nothingness and
everything's relative and everything's your truth and everything's subject to
change and everything's how we feel about it and it really provides a level
of bondage that is absolutely difficult absolutely like yeah we for my generation
specifically and i'm sure maybe even globally believe this is a problem,
(28:02):
but we're in the middle of an identity crisis. Yes.
Nobody knows who they are. Even people in the church, like they don't know who they are.
And it's horribly sad because again,
everything you do flows out of your identity, who you think you are.
So if you don't know who you are, you'll be blown and tossed by the wind. Yeah.
(28:22):
It's big. And I think Like it's super obvious in your age group,
but it's present in all of them.
And so for you, you're wrestling this through, you're in Calgary, bottom of the bottom.
You had this moment where you cry out to God. Oh, this is good. This is a good moment.
Yeah. God is so good, man. He's like...
(28:44):
So loving, but he'll also tell you when you're doing something wrong.
But it won't ever be, hey, you're horrible.
He won't condemn you. He'll just say, hey, listen, my son, we need to fix this.
But I had this moment. I'm going to grab a sip of water quick.
Okay. So I was in the middle of crying out to God. I'm laying on my bed.
(29:05):
I'm like, God, what is next?
How come when I did the thing, it didn't work out?
I'm like i'm like kind of mad at god at this point i'm like i thought you made me a lawyer,
he didn't but i'm i'm like i'm like low low and like i feel like i hit a glass
ceiling i can't get higher and i'm praying to god and he's like get on your
(29:29):
knees and i'm like no i'm not gonna do that yeah you can talk to me right here
as i'm laying on my bed which is pretty arrogant of me to say to God,
but the moment he's like, no, Avery, get on your knees.
And so I got, I'm like, okay, I'll do it. I'll do it.
I got on my knees. And the moment my knee hit the ground, God's presence was
just like on me, there's tears going.
(29:52):
And I'm like, oh God, you love me so much.
I can't even believe this. This is like, you've fixed me.
Of course, I wasn't completely fixed. It's a process this
to your life yeah but like the depression lifted
in that moment yeah it was just god's presence
was just like right on you yeah and then i
(30:12):
was thinking like well maybe maybe your physical posture at
times could be a reflection of your heart posture so good so somebody should
write that down so don't be afraid to lift your hands in worship yes there you
go yeah yeah because you bumped up against that i don't need to i don't need
to i don't need to yes i will and god's like Like, yeah, I've been waiting for this moment.
(30:34):
I'm kind of a stubborn person sometimes, I'm being honest.
But God is stronger than my stubbornness. Yeah, he is.
So he meets you there and directs you. You ended up coming home.
You came back to GP. Yeah. Oh, my goodness. I barely made it back home alive.
Auntie knows this. I had this really awesome car.
(30:54):
It was a piece of junk. I put a new engine in it. I'm like, this engine is going to run forever.
On my way back home, my car blew up. And then I had to use the rest of my student
loan, which is a bad idea.
Dave Ramsey would not approve to go get another car so I could actually make it home.
Yeah so it was like several trips back and forth i'm
missing shifts at work because my car i can't get
(31:17):
back anyways i finally made it back
home and now it's like okay god what now
i'm i've just what what felt like i just wasted a year of my life like yeah
what now for what now i'm back at the same spot i was right when i graduated
and that summer though like god healed up a bunch of stuff Jeff,
(31:38):
you had some positive experiences.
And I love that along the way, you kind of just kept asking,
like, maybe this is who I am.
Maybe this is who I am. Maybe this is who I am. So now you have a positive summer
and God builds you up physically. You got a good job.
Yeah, I was working for my uncle at an oil fields company.
And it was, you know, great atmosphere, great guys. I had a company truck.
I got to work alone in the middle of nowhere. I'm like, this is awesome.
(32:03):
Maybe I'm meant to be an operator in the oil field. Maybe this is who I am.
Like, maybe this is who I am. But like the whole time, right,
I've got like Christian podcasts on in the truck all day.
And they're going through a bunch of the books of the Bible and like First Corinthians,
I remember, and Hebrews and I think John, they went through.
So I'm like, oh, maybe, maybe I should follow along in my Bible when I get home
from work. So I started doing that.
(32:24):
And then God was like, highlight this, highlight that. Here's what I mean by this.
And it was just like, and everything was like blowing up. I'm like,
whoa, God, you're so much more than an experience. There's actual thought and
intellect in this. And I was blown away. Yeah.
So creates a space where you can actually ask God, what do you honestly have
(32:46):
planned for me? Instead of bless what I have planned.
Exactly. I mean, a man, you know, plans his ways, but the Lord directs his steps.
So I'm always planning. I'm always looking into the future.
But I didn't really know what I was going to do in the fall.
So I'm working in the summer.
God's like building this relationship every single night.
And then my buddy, some of you know him, his name's Jamin, super cool guy.
(33:09):
If you meet him, take him out for coffee.
He's like, Avery, I feel like I need to invite you to Egypt.
I'm like, I think you're wrong. Have a nice day.
And then we went out for coffee again. And he's like, Avery,
I really feel like I need to invite you to Egypt, which is Youth with a Mission.
It's a DTS, a discipleship training school that he was inviting me to.
(33:31):
I'm like, oh, those YWAM kids, you know, I don't know how I feel about that.
You know, they're super spiritual.
He invited me a third time. I'm like, okay, well, maybe I should pray about this.
Because I still don't know what I'm going to do in the fall.
Maybe I'll go to business school here in town because it'll be cheaper and I
can actually afford that.
And the moment I prayed about this, I'm like, God, should I go to Egypt with Jamin? He's like, yes.
(33:56):
And that was it. I'm like, okay, I guess I'm going to go to Egypt.
But up until this point, it was like, okay, I can't make this work on my own.
If I go where God wants me to go, things will just work out way better.
Because when you're in his will and you uh the best place for you to be is in god's will.
So i'm like oh yeah i'm not gonna make that mistake again because it
(34:17):
did not work out yeah so i'm like i guess i'm going to egypt i tell my mom it's
like hey mom guess what going to egypt in the fall and she's like oh hi good
for you so i get because there's with the application there's usually a pastoral reference letter.
So I get the reference letter from YWAM for Avery.
(34:38):
I'm like, awesome. I think this could be a good spot. I open it.
Destination Egypt. I'm like, oh, like that doesn't sound safe at all.
Has he prayed about it? Is this actually the Lord?
I don't know. But totally where God had for you because he takes us out of the comfort zone.
He takes us out of the stuff that is super predictable for us sometimes.
(34:59):
You have talked about surrender Surrender and the idea that like ultimately
asking God, where do you want me to go?
Yeah. And being willing to respond to that. It takes surrender, which is a big deal.
Yeah. I mean, if you want to know where God wants you to go,
you have to, I mean, it's good to plan.
We should never stop planning, but you have to surrender your plans and your will for his will.
(35:21):
Because when you do that, I mean, you'll be surprised where he'll take you.
Yeah. It's incredible. It's incredible.
So you had no idea what to expect. You just knew that God was calling you there.
Like there wasn't even pictures on the website of what the base looked like.
I didn't know if Egyptians spoke Arabic or Egyptian or African.
I'm like, I know nothing about any of this, but let's go. Yeah.
(35:44):
It's a wild adventure. And it's one of those things when you step out just in faith.
And I think like there's people watching that right now, you know,
they're 30, 40, 50, 60 years old. They're like, I would love to do that.
But whatever it is, it's always when you say yes to God and you surrender,
It's always going to be something into the faith zone, something that you can't control and box up.
(36:06):
It's not always Egypt, but it's something that's going to require faith.
And I think whenever God's calling you to something, there's always a way to
rationalize out of that.
That's a side note. We didn't talk about that. Yes. But if God's calling you
to do something, you'll be like, oh, well, that isn't practical right now.
No, we can't actually own a house right now because we want to travel.
(36:26):
Oh, we're not ready for this yet. We can't financially afford this.
Oh, we've got this responsibility and that responsibility.
There's a million things asking for your attention. attention,
but God's like, why don't you put mine first? And then all these other things will come.
Yes. Is that like, I mean, that's scripture, right? Seek first the kingdom,
all these things will be added. Yeah.
(36:46):
I love this. And I think that the restlessness that we feel is a pursuit of,
you know, the things that God has for us.
And until we find it in him, we just maintain that that place of restlessness.
So you end up in Egypt. Okay.
So you said this, I went expecting God to tell me what to do with my life.
(37:07):
Right. So at this point, I still don't know what I'm supposed to do.
I know I'm like kind of skilled at a couple of things, but really I'm like, I'm 20.
I don't really have any sellable skills. Excuse me.
I'm like, God, I'm going to go and you have to tell me what I'm going to do after this.
You have to tell me what I'm supposed to do with with my life because I need to know.
So I went with that expectation. Yeah. And he did tell me what I'm supposed to do with my life.
(37:32):
The atmosphere in a setting like that is, is a setup for that because you're
seeking God and every day you're immersed in him.
They schedule Bible reading time into every morning. So you have no choice but
to read your Bible and pray every morning.
And in that, I mean, it's crazy. God will just like, just talk to you.
Like the God of the universe is just going to talk to you.
(37:53):
And it's something that, I mean, that can happen anywhere, anytime for anybody.
But I think it's like, it's so good when young people take this time before
you've had so much noise from the world to just go, okay, I'm dedicating myself
to what you have to say to me.
And Psalm 37, 4, delight yourself in the Lord. He will give you the desires
of your heart. And you have a... Oh, that is a good verse. Yeah.
(38:16):
He'll give you the desires of your heart. Like we all have desires,
right? He can give you the satisfaction of that, but he can also give you the
desires themselves. Yes.
So if he gives you the desire, that's like, that is mind-blowing because I have
no want or need to go do thing X.
Yes. And God gives you the desire to go do thing X. And then you want to go do the thing, right?
(38:40):
Because he gives you that desire. He gives you the desire. Yes.
So it's connected to surrender. It's connected to God, whatever you have for
me, I want what you have for me.
And in there, we commit ourselves to him and he gives us these desires that
maybe weren't awakened before or we hadn't been aware of before,
but suddenly something starts stirring.
So part of that is your being in Egypt.
(39:02):
Like you hadn't thought of that before, but when it came up.
Egypt for YWAM, Youth With A Mission, is probably the last place I would have chosen to go. Yeah.
But I got there. I'm like, okay, God, yeah, you can tell me what your plan is
for my life now. He's like, Avery, hold on.
It's day two. You're still jet lagged. We've got three months,
four months, five months. Like, hold on. Yeah.
(39:24):
But, yeah. Give me anything. Tell me anything, Lord.
But you look ahead, like the story is interesting because everything about the
discipleship training and whether you go to Bible school or leadership training
school or seven weeks in Asia or whatever,
any of these programs are designed to walk you through the processes of emptying
you of self and making room for God to come in and be in you what he wants to
(39:46):
be and lead you in the path that he has for you.
But the program, I think it might be at every YWAM base. It's all the ones I've
been at, but they have a system.
And one of the weeks is the Father Heart of God. Oh my goodness. That's a good week.
Yeah. That's a good week. And the title triggers a lot of people because of
dad issues. Triggered me.
Yeah. I was looking at the schedule the one day of like what all the weeks are
(40:09):
because every week there's a different topic with a a different speaker and
each speaker is like that's their topic that they talk in there for.
Years so they're very good at so we're like okay character of god good hearing
god's voice good you know evangelizing i'm like oh that's cool yeah and then
the one week was the father heart of god
and i'm like god we don't have to deal with this right now we can we can hold
(40:32):
off on this i don't want to go there right now yeah and you know what he said
he's like get ready i'm like oh okay.
So good. So the week starts and you've got the best possible attitude.
Sarcasm no i so tell us about this week
this week started and like if you know me i
(40:53):
am not like the type of person that's like super artsy or
like here's this visual explanation of this lecture i just want the speaker
to speak and me to write notes and then i've got these nice organized notes
i'm like nice got it but this speaker he was an older guy from switzerland and
he was kind of like like a touchy old guy, you like to hug people.
(41:15):
And I'm like, this is not my speed. This is weird. I don't like this.
The first lecture, he gets us to grab a physical object, to go find an object
around the base that represents our earthly father.
Well, I was kind of dumb. I mean, I was totally not.
How is this any use, right? I mean, some of you, that may be absolutely your speed.
(41:39):
But for me, I was not happy with this. like teach
me the things not the these abstract
objects anyways i go and i
find this broken brick on the ground i'm like oh that's i
was just like wandering around killing time and picked up the brick and then
walked back it's not super meaningful for you you're just not not at that moment
no yeah and then we go around the circle they all share what their object how
(42:03):
their object represents their dad and there's some tears going around and it
gets to me i'm like so i have to come up with something on the spot.
And I'm like, this broken brick is like my dad because he's broken.
He's not being used for anything productive.
And he's just kind of out there alone, rejected, and he's removed himself from everything.
(42:27):
And as I'm saying this, I'm,
After that lecture, my one leader came up to me and he's like,
Avery, when I was in the DTS, I picked the exact same thing for the same reason.
And I'm like, whoa, that's crazy. At this point, it's like a champagne bottle.
(42:50):
The little metal cage is off, the paper is off, and the cork is about to go.
And I'm like, I am not ready for this next lecture today.
So the guy, the speaker, gives me a hug. And in that moment,
it was like totally a God hug. Like it felt different.
I'm like, I almost broke down right there. That was, that was almost the end.
And then I kind of, I let go prematurely and got myself together, walked back to my room.
(43:15):
I'm like, all right, we're good. We're good.
And I walked back to the next lecture and God said, get ready.
And I'm like, okay, okay. Okay, and this lecture, again, was not something I would enjoy.
The speaker, he got us to write a letter to God. I'm like, oh,
(43:37):
that's not so bad. I mean, you know, it's just like writing out a prayer.
And so he wrote out this letter to God. And then he said, flip the page over
and allow him to write a letter back to you.
I'm like, oh, that's dumb. God doesn't speak to us like that. That's ridiculous.
First the brick, now the letter. this is nuts and then i was just like okay
(44:01):
i'll swallow my pride for like two seconds god write what you want to write
and he said avery i love you and i'm proud of you and in that in that moment,
i couldn't even write anymore there was like tears and snot and i was just like
completely overwhelmed with god's presence right in that moment yeah it was
(44:22):
the strongest i've ever felt his presence yeah but it wasn't like oh here's
god it was like my son you've come home right yeah,
and i i kind of i kept kept writing he's
continuing i should have brought the letter actually that would have been good but eventually
it got to the point where i like can't actually see the paper anymore
(44:43):
because there's so many tears the paper's starting to get all
soaked and stuff and it was a mess and at
that point god stopped speaking and
he showed me a vision and it was me and him playing pass in the backyard yeah
and i was like as a father and a son i was like four years old in this and i
(45:04):
throw the ball and i run up and i give him a big hug and i'm like Like, whoa, that's crazy.
Like, he placed, like, gave me this vision of, like, him being the father in my life.
Yeah. The father, he, like, God is the father I never had. Yeah.
And it's incredible because I think the weight of that, whether you have a great
(45:28):
father or absent father or a very harsh father, we all ultimately crave that,
that absolutely perfect,
heart of the father.
Like every good and perfect gift comes from him, right?
That place of belonging. And what I love about it is that everything prior to
this, your God experiences, you're kind of like evaluating, like,
(45:49):
now that I've done this, is this who I am? Is this who I am? Is this who I am?
And in this moment, it's, I love you, and I'm proud of you, and you're doing nothing.
Really. It's not about performance. It's about who you are.
And I think we get the picture of that when Jesus, before he started his ministry, right?
He has to hear that from the Father. The first thing before Jesus does anything
(46:11):
in Matthew is, God, he gets baptized, and when he comes out,
God says, this is my son whom I love, and with him I am well pleased.
And that's very very interesting because God in that moment is affirming Jesus's identity.
And that blew me away because he did the same for me. He'll do the same for you too. Yeah.
Before he's done anything like the gospels haven't even started yet.
(46:33):
And God's like, this is my son whom I love and with him I'm well pleased.
And your father, your earthly father should be proud of you and should love
you and should be pleased with you before you've done anything.
I missed out on that. But even if you have a great father, your heavenly father,
God, he will say, I love you. I'm proud of you.
(46:55):
And with you, I'm well pleased. And light, that starts a fruitful life.
That starts a fruitful life.
And that was like, that was the affirmation of who I am.
Like, I don't have to be a lawyer because, you know, he's already pleased with me. Yeah. Right.
I don't have to seek out all these numbing things because because I know I'm loved.
(47:16):
And I know that I can go anywhere that he calls me to because he has a place
for me. Yeah. You belong somewhere. I belong somewhere.
And this is like, I love that when we were kind of praying and talking about
this before, like it's, you know, like you're 21 years old.
What do I have to say to a 60 year old kind of thing? But it's that,
like we, all of us need to hear that from God.
(47:39):
We crave that. We're searching that place of validation that I belong somewhere,
that I'm loved unconditionally, that I have somewhere to run like that.
That is an internal craving for every single human.
Yeah. And what's so interesting is like, God will show you your identity,
who he made you to be before he tells you what to do.
(48:00):
I, what I was doing is I was trying to place my identity in the purpose itself.
Yes. And God was like, no, it's two separate things. This is who you are and you do this.
Not, I do this, this is who I am. So the purpose comes out of identity.
The purpose comes out of the identity. Yes. Yes.
It's so good. You say once identity is set, you are grounded.
(48:21):
Yes. What does grounded mean to you? Well, for me, I was kind of trying to put
my identity in all these different things, trying to find something that would stick.
And when God affirmed my identity, which he will do for you,
you know who you are and you know who God made you to be.
Even if you don't know yourself that well yet, you know that you're loved.
(48:43):
So you can step out and take on more risks because you have this base that you're operating from.
Right. And if you make a mistake, it's not the end of the world because you're loved. You're loved.
Yeah. And I think that's interesting. We actually, in our province this week,
week, there's been all kinds of political hoo-ha about identities and various
(49:03):
things and what we are allowing and what we are not allowing and what's the
age at which you can decide who you are and what you're about.
And I think it's interesting that like you say when you were.
I'm going to be a lawyer and the people around you were like,
that's awesome. We're supportive, whatever.
And it feels good. And so you run towards it. A little bit of confirmation bias too. Yeah, of course.
(49:24):
And like, everybody's trying to put their identity in something, right?
And for some people, it just happens to be a politically charged subject.
Totally. Right? And if that's the case, you have no shortage of people who will
come alongside and support that. That is dangerous.
That is very dangerous. So the word validated, like we've talked about that,
that identity and the purpose, it's connected to a validation.
(49:48):
And essentially our society right now and your generation is craving validation, right?
The identity issue is leading to, I need to be validated.
And dictionary definition of that is to prove that something is acceptable.
Yes. So in other words, they want to know I'm acceptable.
Like you were saying that like at least 50% of my generation has divorced parents
(50:12):
and has an absent father in some way, right?
And of course, when you're not fathered, you don't know how to a father so it
makes sense it's just a broken sinful society that's what we live in but the
father's job is to validate you yes right so everybody's trying to find that something,
and then they can't find it anywhere but because it's look inside exactly find
(50:35):
find out who you are it's like look i'm going to look inside myself and figure out who i am well.
You're not looking in the right spot. Yeah. Right. You look to God because he
made you and he will tell you who you are.
It's like if you got a brand new Honda Civic, you're like, hmm,
it's pretty nice Honda Civic.
But the manufacturer is going to tell you, oh, that's a 1.7 liter engine.
(50:56):
It's a five speed standard.
It's got all these different things. And its purpose is to go from zero to 60 in like 12 seconds.
I mean, it's not that fast, but it's the manufacturer determines the identity.
Which reveals the purpose. purpose. If the car itself was to look inside itself,
it'd be like, oh, I'm an engine. So I'm supposed to burn gasoline.
(51:16):
That's my purpose. That's my identity. That's who I am.
No, no, not at all. The manufacturer determined your identity, determines who you are.
And then from there tells you what to do. So good. So good.
So St. Augustine, one of my favorite quotes is, you have made us for yourself,
oh Lord, and our heart is restless until it rests in you.
And that that to me is just
(51:38):
that thing it's that restlessness of what am i about what's
my purpose why am i here what you know you were running towards stuff
because of that it's meant to find itself in you yep
you've got a quote i've got one of your
faves as well i actually didn't write it down it's on my phone but
it's by this christian rapper spoken
word type of guy name is goes by by propaganda song
(52:00):
is called lofty and it says well
my favorite line in the whole song it just gives me
chills i like re-listen to that part of the song on repeat but it's
but worth value and beauty is not determined by some inequality but by the length
for which the owner would go to possess them and you look at the cross god went
(52:21):
the ultimate length just to
possess you so good So you belong somewhere because God found you. Yeah.
Yeah. So that place, so good.
That place of purpose is, you had phrased it.
Do what I put in you to do and use what I already put in you.
Right. So after the Father Heart of God week, after this week,
(52:46):
I'm like, okay, what now?
And then God was like, do what I put in you to do.
I'm like, wait, you're not going to call me to do something that I hate right now?
You're not going to tell me to become a full-time missionary in some country I've never heard of?
Right he's like no do what i put in you to do and for
(53:09):
me that was god highlighted i've always
been into business stuff i mean i was shoveling snow and
mowing lawns for as long as i can remember so good and
then also speaking because then i'm like oh i kind of i kind of like speaking
so these two things god was like do those things and it's not god didn't say
you're gonna have to take this amount of money and you're gonna have to go invest
(53:30):
it with this bank and you're gonna going to have to get this type of loan to
start this type of business. And he'll direct your steps, of course.
But it's like, do this.
And there's so much security in that because, you know, I know who I am and
I know what God put in me to do.
So it gives you room to risk. Yeah. It gives you room to dream.
Gives you room to dream. Right. Now that I, business, I like that.
(53:54):
That's cool. I can dream in that direction now.
Right. And now as I'm moving in this direction, it's kind of like going this
way, but God's just directing every little step.
Yeah, I love that. I think it's huge.
So just as we wrap up, this is like the big thing.
But you had said you believe God is waiting for us to surrender.
(54:18):
God is waiting for you to say yes to him. And that's not a salvation message, although it could be.
It's am i gonna give my life to god so that he will in turn give me a better
life because it's life with him yeah and the fact that you're breathing this
is a quote from rex crane i was given a audio clip of this guy i didn't even
(54:41):
know who he was from 2012 which is like ages ago,
but he said the fact that you're breathing is proof that god needs something out of you.
Yeah so he put something in all of us
right and our job is to you
know do that yeah so good
and i love how this whole thing roots back to like that engagement with god
(55:05):
calling you out on who you are in him like that that place of the father heart
this reminds me ephesians 3 um when paul is writing and he says for this reason
i bow my knees to the father of our lord jesus christ and specifically to the
Father of our Lord Jesus Christ,
from whom the whole family in heaven and earth is named, that he would grant
you, according to the riches of his glory, to be strengthened with might through
(55:29):
his Spirit in the inner man.
Like that whole process, right? Isn't that beautiful? Through the spirit in the inner man,
that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith and that you being rooted
and grounded in love may be able to comprehend with all the saints what is the
width and the length and the depth and the height to know the love of Christ,
(55:50):
which passes knowledge that you may be filled with all the fullness of God.
Like that's pretty much what you're describing. To be rooted and grounded in
his love. Rooted and grounded, right? Bam. Bam.
So walking testimony of this. Verse 20, now to him who is able to do exceedingly
abundantly above all that we ask or think according to his power that works
(56:10):
in us, to him be glory in the church by Christ Jesus to all generations.
So it literally is saying that the fruitfulness of our lives,
what he's going to do, the exceedingly abundantly according to the power that
works in us is rooted and grounded in love, which we find in the Father.
It's so simple, but so profound. on. Yes, it is.
(56:31):
Because there's noise and everything going on. You think, I have to find myself
and that's going to be complicated.
And this person says this and this person says this. Yeah. But God's love is
just the common denominator.
Yeah. It's the root of your entire equation.
Yeah. And if you have that, you have everything. You've got everything.
Okay. So last, last thing here. If there's one thing you want people to know
(56:54):
about life with Jesus, what do you want their takeaway to be?
If you haven't found your identity
yet, yet God's got it. He's waiting for you to come to him to find it.
God's waiting for you to say yes to him so he can show you who he made you to be.
Yeah, man, so good. Isn't that great?
Well, we're, we are so proud of you, Avery. And I'm so, so excited to see what God's got for you.
(57:20):
10, 15, 20 years down the road as well. I think a lot of us who are maybe a
little further down the path, I think that that would be the one thing that
we would pray over this generation is that early on,
there would be a revelation of who Jesus is and what He really says about who
you are and the value that is in you, the value of the life that you live,
(57:43):
that it really isn't meant to be dissected and evaluated through the lens of flesh,
but it is meant to be evaluated through the love of God.
So, would you pray for the congregation this morning?
We're going to have the worship team come close us off. Father,
I just thank you for just this opportunity to speak today.
And I pray that you will...
(58:05):
Speak into the lives of each and every one of us, God.
I pray that you would find the one thing that we're trying to find purpose and
meaning in and you would replace that with you.
God, I just bless everybody here and I pray that you would just rock their world.
God, I pray that you would completely change their understanding of love and
(58:28):
what it means to be a son or a daughter of you. you.
So God, I just bless this congregation, bless these people in Jesus' name. Amen. Amen. Amen.
Thank you, Avery. Thank you.
So good. Thanks again for tuning in to The Light Show.
If you have any questions, would like to access our online resources,
(58:51):
or want to support this ministry, you can visit us at www.victorygp.com.
You can also text to give.
Just text 587-207-4387 and follow the promptings.
If you're on YouTube, Facebook, Instagram, or TikTok, we'd love if you'd come and join us there.
We hope you'll join us again for the next episode of The Light Show.
(59:13):
Remember, we overcome by the blood of the Lamb and the word of our testimony.
Music.
Welcome to The Light Show at Victory Church, Grand Prairie.
We pray these testimonies build your faith, strengthen your heart,
and help magnify the presence of God who is with you right now through faith
in Jesus Christ, His Son.
The Light Show is also available to watch on YouTube. Just search for Victory Church, Grand Prairie.
You can also join us on Instagram, Facebook, and TikTok for regular encouragement
(00:24):
in your walk with the Lord.
And now, let there be light.
Well, good morning, everybody.
We're so glad to be able to do another round of The Light Show with our special
guest, Avery Morrow, today.
You have some deep things to share today that I think are going to be super
helpful, and I'm excited about that. Yes, I'm excited too.
(00:48):
We're going to dig in. But let's just pray before we go. Lord,
we thank you for this day.
We thank you for the opportunity to shine the light, Lord, to declare what you
have have done, who you are, who you are in us and through us, God.
And Lord, I thank you for Avery today. I thank you for his heart for you.
I thank you for his passion for life and for purpose and the identity that you've
(01:09):
placed within him as your kid.
And Lord, I thank you today that you lead us where we need to go.
We thank you, Holy Spirit, that you work in our hearts as we receive,
Lord, each person who hears this, whether live or on podcast or on YouTube,
whatever means you choose, God, I thank you that it ministers to their hearts.
Lord, your love, your presence, your light transforms us.
(01:31):
And we thank you for that today, God, in Jesus' name.
Amen. All right. So tell us just a little bit about yourself for anybody who
doesn't know you. Okay. So hi, I'm Avery. Nice to meet you.
I, uh, hey, David. I play bass most Sundays.
I was born in 2002. So that's pretty recent.
(01:53):
Yeah no i think i was born into
a christian family though it was not
perfect but i was for my
parents divorced which is you know it's something i had to deal with of course
it's not like the worst thing that can happen to a kid it's pretty bad but through
that god definitely worked and showed himself and i think because of that my
(02:18):
relationship with god is somewhat stronger stronger than it would have been.
So simple statement, I always ask whoever we're interviewing ahead of time,
who is God to you and how important is his presence in your life?
God is the father I never had.
And the importance, I can't even measure it.
(02:39):
He is so influential and in everything that I do, I hope to glorify him.
Like he's just, he's changed my life.
It is true that like you live on fire for God, which I think is a really cool thing.
And it's a beautiful statement, especially for somebody who's young.
You didn't have to fall all the way down a well to dig yourself back into a place of relationship.
(03:03):
You have lived a relatively positive life.
Relatively. Relatively. You're not perfect. No. But I mean, a lot of people
probably, we have this thing that we do in church. Somebody's going to share their testimony.
They should have done really bad things or there should be like some really big story to tell.
(03:24):
Like I pre-interviewed you. We didn't dig up a lot of skeletons in the closet.
It's the grace of God that I didn't have like a huge fall off and then come back.
Yes. So that's not me. That's God.
Yes, precisely. And what a gift, right? To be able to have.
And we've talked before and you said, you know, some of the things that you're
grateful for is that you hit certain internal bottoms before things were blown up.
(03:48):
Like you found bottoms sooner.
At one point, like life, like everything was kind of just like going down.
I tried to figure everything out on my own and then it failed miserably, thankfully.
Which I say thankfully because if I didn't fail so soon, I probably would have
just like coasted and been like kind of lukewarm for forever.
But God let me fail so that he could show himself to me.
(04:11):
So your failures are not as bad as you think because God's going to use those.
So true. So let's walk through a a little bit your story.
You mentioned briefly your parents divorced when you were little. Yeah.
Fairly traumatic situation. I mean, there's, you know, not always,
there's always something that causes those situations. And so we don't want to like bag on anybody.
(04:35):
But as a kid, there were voids in your life.
Voids in parenting as far as a dad figure in your life.
I know you've been blessed with some really good men in your life,
though. You got your grandpa and your Uncle Kelly and Simon.
You got some good guys speaking into your life.
You got some mentors even now that are speaking into your life.
But one of the things that I think is interesting is that, and again,
(04:56):
we're not going to get into details of your early childhood,
but there's a lot of people that go through things early on and that becomes
the sticking point of their life.
Like that is everything I I live comes out of that place.
And it sounds like in your early development, kind of your like junior high,
those middle spaces where you could have chosen like everything is about,
(05:18):
a broken home or whatever, you really leaned into God and you were involved
in church and worship team and whatever.
Tell us a little bit about that. Well, like what you should know is that,
I mean, I'm not ripping on my dad at all.
I love him. You should too, right? God loves him.
But for the majority of my life, he was completely absent.
Emotionally, a lot of times he just was never there. So I grew up with this.
(05:43):
I grew up with the burden of me thinking, oh, I have to figure this out on my
own. I have to learn how to be a man on my own.
Thankfully, guys like Uncle Kelly, like you mentioned, and Grandpa,
they were there and they poured a lot into me.
But there was this absence in my life and I couldn't quite fix it on my own.
I was involved in church and I, you know, I pursued God.
(06:06):
You know, I was pretty involved, but I never really dealt with the damage that was done at this time.
Yeah. Just try to keep a game face. Do life.
I was just like, this is just what I have to carry and I think we'll make it.
Yeah. But that, I hope you know you don't have to live like that. Yeah.
And did you feel like you had to start not strive, but like,
(06:30):
were you conscious of not being like your dad?
Was that a concern? One of my biggest fears at the time was ending up like my dad.
Because I saw the damage that was done to myself and to my siblings and my mom and my family.
And the last thing I wanted was to pass that on to my family.
(06:51):
And I didn't know how to deal with that because I know I've got these wounds.
But I'm like, how do I shoulder this so I don't pass it on?
And I'm like, I don't know how to do that. So I was very scared of that. Yeah. Yeah.
And it's a weird thing because it's kind of a spiritual tie that can happen
where we, you know, because of what we've experienced in the lives of people
(07:14):
around us, we can be so bold to be like, I never want to be like that.
I never want to be like that. I never want to be like that.
And kind of, it's a measure of judgment and we end up tying ourselves to a behavior.
Like I have to produce something. I have to be a certain kind of person because
I'm not going to be like that.
And it actually is a sort of bondage, isn't it? Like it's a heavy weight.
And like the lie the enemy says is like, oh, you're going to be just like your dad.
(07:36):
Like, just like he was like his dad and his dad was like his dad.
You're going to end up exactly the same way.
Doesn't matter how hard you resist. And like, I kind of believe that for a little bit.
And as a result, I was like, I built a shell around myself and I'm like,
I'm not going to let anybody get this close because I don't want them to see this, right?
I don't want to hurt them too, you know? So, and part of that drove you to stay away from him.
(08:02):
Like you shared with me the, the way the court system works,
you're supposed to, you have to show up in person as a kid to say,
I don't want to be with my dad.
Yeah. So like mom was in this court battle with dad.
And as kids, we're kind of like, we're kind of just like in the middle of it.
And it was like, it was years of court, but the, in middle school,
(08:23):
most of the time, like we, we would, during the week we'd be at mom's house.
And then on the weekend, we were supposed to go to dad's house,
but as kids, we had the option to stay home.
I just chose to stay home because I'm like...
I don't want to end up like this. I don't see this as beneficial.
And I honestly, at the time, I didn't really like the guy. I'm being completely
(08:44):
honest. I mean, that sounds bad to say. Sounds fair. But I was pretty resentful.
So we would go to this exchange, they called it.
And it was just some third party person that worked for like a child service company.
We'd get into their car. We'd drive to a parking lot.
They'd roll the windows down. Dad would be there. we'd say hey
(09:05):
dad no i don't want to go this week then we have a quick small
talk chat and then we we'd go back and i
usually always stayed home brook and caden often which
are my siblings if you don't know they they
often went and i would stay home and of course i'm like that's just a part of
life i'm kind of used to it when brook and caden would come home it was i love
(09:30):
them it was turmoil in the house because now they're dealing with all the the
the the emotional stuff that just came from dad's house, and they're bringing this back home.
And I'm just watching this happen because I've removed myself,
I kind of get a little bit of perspective.
So I was seeing all this damage that was happening. I'm like,
I don't know how to deal with this. Yeah.
(09:52):
And I think it's interesting, like, the situation that you're describing,
our court system does the best that it can, but it's a little messed up.
Yeah. Yeah. Well, family stuff is so messy because it's like,
oh, he said, she said, like, what is actually going on here?
And my dad, he believes a lot of lies.
So it's really hard to filter out what is truth in that kind of setting.
(10:15):
And as kids, like, you don't know what to believe. You assume every adult's
telling the truth. So that's not to say, oh, woe is me. God fixed me.
But this is where I came from. Yeah.
And I think it's a good thing to say because when we talk about,
again, testimonies and it's like, oh, what was the big of your life?
(10:36):
And we look for these like crazy catastrophes, but we're living in a society
where over 50% of marriages break down in our nation.
It's crazy. So, honestly, the majority of kids going through our school systems
are dealing with situations like this.
Parents, some are able to deal with it better than others. But essentially,
there is a generation that has come up going, who am I? And what's of importance? Where am I going?
(11:01):
As far as I know, and I'm not the most knowledgeable person in here,
I'll do my best. Bring it.
The role of a father is to bring their kid up into the world and say,
yeah, you're strong. You can do this. I do love you.
And you have a place to come to whenever anything goes wrong.
Like, I love mom's story about grandpa.
She said, grandpa told her that you can use me as a scapegoat anytime.
(11:26):
And that kind of safety that you find in a father was completely absent in our lives.
But that is the role of the father. And like, honestly, like the more I grow
up, the more I see, oh, the father is supposed to do this too.
I don't have this right now. And then God's like, gotcha, boom.
Yeah. So for you, you're the oldest sibling.
(11:50):
Yes, I'm the oldest of three. Now four. Now four.
So you took on responsibility internally, right? Yeah. You're the man of the
house. I thought I was, yeah. I thought I was.
That's a lot to carry as a 10, 11, 12-year-old, right? Yeah,
like, don't worry, Mom, I got it.
Yeah, it's a big deal. So you were in church.
(12:13):
I mean, obviously your mom, your family did a great job of making sure that
you knew God, that you were in the house of God, that you had a foundation.
You go through middle school relatively easily. You get to high school.
High school yes i think like if you're in high school right now you know exactly
what i'm talking about we're like everything at you is like trying to grab your
(12:36):
attention and you don't really know what to do you don't know who you are and
you're trying to figure out all these questions and,
you just kind of almost like paralyzed with all this noise and for me i was
just like well i could could just, I mean, my buddy's kind of cool.
Maybe, maybe I'll just like hang out with them. And like, you become like the
(12:57):
people you hang out with, right?
So I was hanging out with... He's quoting scripture. Quoting scripture.
I read my Bible. Don't worry.
You become like the people you hang out with. And I found myself turning into
somebody I didn't really like in high school.
Like it was, I mean, it was on the football team and just kind of involved in stuff.
(13:18):
And I found that I was as one person with my friends and then another person
at church. So I'm sorry about that.
But I kind of watched myself fall into this.
I'm like, well, I guess this is who I am. This is where I fit in.
Even if it's a manufactured version of myself.
This must be who I am with this group of people. This is what people approve
(13:42):
of you when you're like this.
Yeah. Well, I play football. I'm doing pretty good. This is who I am. This is good.
The thing is, like you say, you know, if you're in high school,
honestly, that's, it happens in the workforce.
Oh, absolutely. There's 30, 40, 50-year-olds that still have different lives.
Here's my church life and here's my regular life.
Yeah. And it's exhausting balancing that. Oh, absolutely. Absolutely.
(14:04):
And like part of it, I think, is like, where are you putting your identity?
Like, for me, I kind of put my identity and oh, I'm like, I'm pretty decent
at music and I'm a decent football player.
That's who I am. I'm a football player who can play music. That's me.
Yeah. And when then high school ended and football was no more, it's like, oh, what now?
(14:26):
Who am I without that? Who am I? Yeah. Which we hear a lot of people that,
you know, even go through high school, even junior college or whatever,
and they're, they feel like they have, well, they've been told they have like
really great skills in sports or whatever, and then have an injury.
And it's like, well, who am I without football, without volleyball,
without whatever? I have no future anymore.
Right. So I thought, okay, well, I don't, I'm about to graduate at this point.
(14:48):
And I'm like, okay, I need to do something productive with my life.
Right? I need to make something happen. I I know I've got something in me.
I just don't know what it is. I'm going to shoot my shot and see what happens. Yeah.
So I thought, well, I wanted to be a lawyer at the time.
I'm like, I've got decent grades. I'm sure I'll be able to get in.
So I applied to two schools. I applied to, because for law, you need an undergrad
(15:11):
and then you need to go to law school after that. So it's seven years.
I'm like, this sounds noble. I like this.
People are going to compliment me when I say I'm going to be a lawyer.
And they did. They did. And you were also processing it with God at that time, right?
Because after graduation, you started reading the Word, digging into that.
So you're not like just yahooing. I did miss a bit.
(15:32):
Yeah. So before I'm thinking about law, it was Christmas in grade 12. So this was 2020?
Yes. Yeah, it was 2020. And then a grandpa were up and I was given a small little
devotional book, How to Adult.
I think it was called Adult. No, Auntie gave that to me. Yeah.
Yeah. And I was reading this and I'm like, oh, this is pretty good. This is pretty good.
(15:54):
And I was like, oh, this, and then I got to like day five. I'm like,
this is like starting to change my life a little bit. We're still on Christmas vacation.
Talking with grandpa, just like,
families around. And I started to read my Bible a little bit more.
And I'm like, well, this is pretty good. There's some good stuff in here.
And I kind of noticed like my step got a little bit lighter and my, I just felt better.
(16:20):
Right. It was a subtle shift.
Yeah. And then Christmas break ends. I go back to school and it's been a couple
of weeks and my buddy's like, Avery, you haven't weren't at all in the last
couple of weeks. I'm like, oh, I didn't even notice.
They're like, yeah, it's okay. You can say it, man. Like, just say it right
now. I'm like, no, I'm good.
(16:41):
I'm good. But yeah, I love that because to me, it's the, it's like such a good
example of we try so hard to not do stuff, but honestly, our best move is to
start doing stuff, right?
Start doing what God wants us to do. And the other stuff just gets gross and drops off the backside.
Side yeah we're focused on what we shouldn't do when you when you're
filling yourself up with god everything else kind of just falls out totally
(17:02):
so it gives you a good launching point
by the time you graduate they're like okay i'm i'm like i'm pretty pretty solid
i think yeah and then at this point you know i kind of started like slipping
back into old old habits and things you know because you're part of that friend
group i mean they aren't bad guys i love them if you're watching Hey, Ashton, how's it going?
(17:26):
No, great. Good guys, but definitely had some habits.
And now I wanted to be a lawyer. I'm like, this pays good.
I like what people, I like people when they say, I like it when people compliment
me on this. I feel like this is my purpose to do this.
That's huge. And what, so let's just suppose you tell somebody,
somebody church comes up to you, what do you think you can do after school?
(17:47):
Oh, I'm going to go to school and be a lawyer.
And their response is, Whoa, that's awesome. We need more Christian lawyers.
Yes. You betcha. I'll make that happen.
Instant what we would phrase as validation.
Absolutely. Instant validation because you have made a good choice.
You have value. You're somebody now that we can get behind.
(18:08):
Exactly. I'm like, this is pretty great. This is a good cause.
So I applied to two schools.
I applied to a business school and an arts school school because my counselor,
my school counselor said, Oh, you should apply to the one you want and a backup
one that you're guaranteed to get into.
I was not accepted into the business school. And I'm like, Oh, that, that sucks.
So, but I was accepted into this bachelor of arts degree. Like right on.
(18:33):
Look at this useless degree that I can use to get to the law.
It's like a, it's like a back road to get into the thing that you want.
And I'm like, this is great. This will work out. I'll just power through these
four years of intensive study, intensive useless study.
If you're in an arts degree, I'm sorry. It's just not for me.
Yeah, it's very good for some people, but it's a challenging degree.
(18:57):
Definitely not for me. It's not my speed.
But I have plans to move to Calgary and study.
And that summer I'm working and I get an email. And it's the U of C saying,
oh, hey, by the way, all of your classes are online i'm like
oh shoot because this is the covid zone
this is right like we're like fourth or fifth wave of
(19:18):
covid at this point and i'm like man that that sucks and like i kind of felt
god to say don't go which i immediately shoved aside because i know i have to
be a lawyer because some people validated that right and then i was already
like committed to an apartment with with my buddy.
And I'm like, I feel obligated. Like I have to go because I have to make this happen.
(19:42):
This is who I'm going to be. Right. And then uncle Kelly, at that point,
I think he was walking in the house and he's like, Avery, did you pray about it?
I'm like, no.
Yeah, I prayed about it, uncle. Yeah. Yeah. I prayed about it.
I did not pray about it because I was scared that God was going to say,
no, Avery, don't go. Because I kind of already knew he was going to say that.
(20:03):
So I went. I went to Calgary and studied in my Bachelor of Arts in Law and Society,
which sounds fancy, but it's basically just a sociology degree,
which if you don't know, is pretty easy.
Sociology is useful, I guess. but anyways I
digress the I got to
(20:25):
Calgary I got my apartment got everything moved in got my laptop open now I'm
about ready to do four years of online study in my little apartment bedroom
and it was actually the most lonely time in my entire life because you're an
extrovert anyway like you somewhat extroverted yeah you like people maybe a little bit yeah Yeah,
maybe just a little bit.
(20:47):
And it was, I like what, like I could feel this, this vision of who I thought
I was supposed to be kind of slipping away.
So it was horribly lonely. I was horribly depressed. And I'm like, who am I supposed to be?
I don't know. Now I'm stuck with all these actual bills and actual groceries
and actual rental insurance and all the things. Yes.
(21:08):
Now I'm studying a useless degree and I'm running out of money and I'm completely alone.
I'm just trying to find something that I can grasp, something that I can hold
on to, something that I know is solid, right?
Eventually, I cut my losses. I'm like, I'm dropping out. This is not worth it.
This is a waste of time, especially when all the professors are like very anti-God
(21:32):
and it's subtly written into everything.
Thing yeah but i was falling
into like some addiction and it was just like a super low
point super low point in my life and i
was running out of money i'm like i gotta go get a job i gotta go get a job
and i'm like if you've ever had if you've ever been depressed you know it's
(21:53):
like a cloud you can't see past three feet in front of you you have no perception
of time like everything it just feels like everything's getting smaller and
more compressed until you're completely isolated.
And COVID doesn't help with that. It does not help. No. So I got a job shoveling
snow because I know I'm capable of shoveling snow.
(22:13):
And this is an interesting thing because this is a go back to where you've been
kind of moment, which is so typical.
When we are in distress, we go back to what we know. We go back to what's familiar.
What's familiar, what we've had success in in the past.
So this is exactly where you go as a kid.
Parents, Lawrence, you're going to be impressed by this. But as a kid,
you had a serious snow shoveling job.
(22:35):
Yeah. So when I was a kid, I was not old enough to work at a job.
I'm like, I need to make money so I can, I just wanted to, I just wanted to do stuff.
So I'm like, I started a snow removal business in the winter and then a lawn
care stuff in the business.
And I had like regular clients and they would pay monthly and then I would shovel
their snow every time it snows.
(22:55):
So I really hoped it didn't snow and I got as many people on the contract as possible.
But like, I was like, this is pretty awesome. I'm running a business.
I've got clients. I've got schedules. This is going great.
I was pretty proud of myself. I think it's pretty impressive, really.
So when I found myself in this identity crisis later on, I'm like, what is what do I know?
(23:16):
I could shovel snow. That's what I can do. I'm pretty good at that.
Such a Canadian answer. So good.
And that job, it was a job. It only added to the isolation and the depression
because now I'm sleep deprived because you have to get up at like two in the
morning to go shovel snow in downtown Calgary.
You're working with the type of people who choose to shovel snow for a job.
Nothing against them. But it's just, it's a rough crowd.
(23:40):
And if they're watching, hi, you should come to Jesus. He loves you.
I'm usually the one that offends people. You just go for it. You just knock it out.
Let's keep it serious, guys. This is serious. I'm in the middle of this identity crisis.
I'm falling back on what I know is familiar. I'm like, I'm just going to shovel snow.
(24:02):
Eventually, I'm like, this is not sustainable. Yeah. So I'm like, what do I do next?
Yeah, and I love you had said that because it was like, maybe I'm a this.
Maybe I'm a football player. Maybe I'm this. Maybe I'm that. Maybe I'm a lawyer.
Maybe that's who I am. And then you go like in this depressive state,
you're like... Because none of it lasted. It all kind of like was fleeting.
(24:25):
So like, who am I now? Nothing works.
Like a lot of people, they put their identity in what they do and who they think they are.
But what I was doing was I was putting my identity in what I thought I could be.
Right. And the problem with that is like it just keeps shifting. Yeah. Right.
Okay. So identity is a big thing for you. Oh my goodness. You're passionate about this topic.
(24:46):
So, can you explain your sense of importance on identity?
The importance of identity is very important.
Very important. Because everything you do flows from your identity, right?
If you say to yourself, I'm a healthy person, that's part of my identity,
(25:06):
you're going to eat healthy and you're going to go to the gym because that's who you are.
But if you say, oh, I'm unhealthy, I'm just never going to be able to have a
six-pack and biceps and all the things, then you'll never have a six-pack or biceps.
And you'll just be like, oh, another extra large pizza.
(25:27):
That's who I am. So it can be positive, it can be negative.
But I guess even if you put your entire identity on being healthy,
that's not healthy either.
Exactly. The reason why identity is important is because everything you do flows
from that. Yeah, totally.
So I was thinking about this too, that we really need to lean into like Psalm
(25:49):
139, verse 16, for you form my inward parts, you knitted me together in my mother's womb.
There's got to be a place of like, there is an actual reason that I'm here.
Like that verse, the psalmist is like, there's a God who made me.
So in our culture, we're...
There seems to be a big question mark as to whether God exists or not.
(26:09):
Suddenly we're chasing all these things, all the outside, whatever.
That particular verse, it has huge implications, like knit you together.
And then you like take a biology class in high school and you realize like the
detail of one cell is more complicated than like an F-16 fighter jet.
It's like how, like, it's not just cell by cell. It's like atom by atom that
he put you together, right?
(26:30):
So if he put all this effort into making you physically, how much more effort
did he put it into making your character and who you are on the inside. Yeah.
So I think when you're like, when we know that that's truth and you throw 18,
19 year olds at like, what are you going to do with your life?
What's your whole life about? What? No kidding. It's pressured up, eh?
(26:51):
No, it's, it's, it's a lot of pressure. I mean, of course, I mean,
keep the pressure on them because they need to figure this out,
right? You can't just let them coast.
Well, okay. So I wrote down one of your other quotes. You said, apathy will kill you.
Apathy will kill you. So this is it. You're like, the pressure has to be on
because if you just don't care, apathy is life-sucking.
My generation, we've almost accepted apathy as a virtue.
(27:15):
And that is horribly destructive because then you're placing your identity in
the absolute nothing. Yeah.
Thank you. Thank you. There you have it. So there's like people around us in all age groups,
but particularly your generation, like this
this group that's kind of coming out of high school and the first few
(27:38):
years of university right now that seems to be this
yeah you're you're in the middle of like nothingness and
everything's relative and everything's your truth and everything's subject to
change and everything's how we feel about it and it really provides a level
of bondage that is absolutely difficult absolutely like yeah we for my generation
specifically and i'm sure maybe even globally believe this is a problem,
(28:02):
but we're in the middle of an identity crisis. Yes.
Nobody knows who they are. Even people in the church, like they don't know who they are.
And it's horribly sad because again,
everything you do flows out of your identity, who you think you are.
So if you don't know who you are, you'll be blown and tossed by the wind. Yeah.
(28:22):
It's big. And I think Like it's super obvious in your age group,
but it's present in all of them.
And so for you, you're wrestling this through, you're in Calgary, bottom of the bottom.
You had this moment where you cry out to God. Oh, this is good. This is a good moment.
Yeah. God is so good, man. He's like...
(28:44):
So loving, but he'll also tell you when you're doing something wrong.
But it won't ever be, hey, you're horrible.
He won't condemn you. He'll just say, hey, listen, my son, we need to fix this.
But I had this moment. I'm going to grab a sip of water quick.
Okay. So I was in the middle of crying out to God. I'm laying on my bed.
(29:05):
I'm like, God, what is next?
How come when I did the thing, it didn't work out?
I'm like i'm like kind of mad at god at this point i'm like i thought you made me a lawyer,
he didn't but i'm i'm like i'm like low low and like i feel like i hit a glass
ceiling i can't get higher and i'm praying to god and he's like get on your
(29:29):
knees and i'm like no i'm not gonna do that yeah you can talk to me right here
as i'm laying on my bed which is pretty arrogant of me to say to God,
but the moment he's like, no, Avery, get on your knees.
And so I got, I'm like, okay, I'll do it. I'll do it.
I got on my knees. And the moment my knee hit the ground, God's presence was
just like on me, there's tears going.
(29:52):
And I'm like, oh God, you love me so much.
I can't even believe this. This is like, you've fixed me.
Of course, I wasn't completely fixed. It's a process this
to your life yeah but like the depression lifted
in that moment yeah it was just god's presence
was just like right on you yeah and then i
(30:12):
was thinking like well maybe maybe your physical posture at
times could be a reflection of your heart posture so good so somebody should
write that down so don't be afraid to lift your hands in worship yes there you
go yeah yeah because you bumped up against that i don't need to i don't need
to i don't need to yes i will and god's like Like, yeah, I've been waiting for this moment.
(30:34):
I'm kind of a stubborn person sometimes, I'm being honest.
But God is stronger than my stubbornness. Yeah, he is.
So he meets you there and directs you. You ended up coming home.
You came back to GP. Yeah. Oh, my goodness. I barely made it back home alive.
Auntie knows this. I had this really awesome car.
(30:54):
It was a piece of junk. I put a new engine in it. I'm like, this engine is going to run forever.
On my way back home, my car blew up. And then I had to use the rest of my student
loan, which is a bad idea.
Dave Ramsey would not approve to go get another car so I could actually make it home.
Yeah so it was like several trips back and forth i'm
missing shifts at work because my car i can't get
(31:17):
back anyways i finally made it back
home and now it's like okay god what now
i'm i've just what what felt like i just wasted a year of my life like yeah
what now for what now i'm back at the same spot i was right when i graduated
and that summer though like god healed up a bunch of stuff Jeff,
(31:38):
you had some positive experiences.
And I love that along the way, you kind of just kept asking,
like, maybe this is who I am.
Maybe this is who I am. Maybe this is who I am. So now you have a positive summer
and God builds you up physically. You got a good job.
Yeah, I was working for my uncle at an oil fields company.
And it was, you know, great atmosphere, great guys. I had a company truck.
I got to work alone in the middle of nowhere. I'm like, this is awesome.
(32:03):
Maybe I'm meant to be an operator in the oil field. Maybe this is who I am.
Like, maybe this is who I am. But like the whole time, right,
I've got like Christian podcasts on in the truck all day.
And they're going through a bunch of the books of the Bible and like First Corinthians,
I remember, and Hebrews and I think John, they went through.
So I'm like, oh, maybe, maybe I should follow along in my Bible when I get home
from work. So I started doing that.
(32:24):
And then God was like, highlight this, highlight that. Here's what I mean by this.
And it was just like, and everything was like blowing up. I'm like,
whoa, God, you're so much more than an experience. There's actual thought and
intellect in this. And I was blown away. Yeah.
So creates a space where you can actually ask God, what do you honestly have
(32:46):
planned for me? Instead of bless what I have planned.
Exactly. I mean, a man, you know, plans his ways, but the Lord directs his steps.
So I'm always planning. I'm always looking into the future.
But I didn't really know what I was going to do in the fall.
So I'm working in the summer.
God's like building this relationship every single night.
And then my buddy, some of you know him, his name's Jamin, super cool guy.
(33:09):
If you meet him, take him out for coffee.
He's like, Avery, I feel like I need to invite you to Egypt.
I'm like, I think you're wrong. Have a nice day.
And then we went out for coffee again. And he's like, Avery,
I really feel like I need to invite you to Egypt, which is Youth with a Mission.
It's a DTS, a discipleship training school that he was inviting me to.
(33:31):
I'm like, oh, those YWAM kids, you know, I don't know how I feel about that.
You know, they're super spiritual.
He invited me a third time. I'm like, okay, well, maybe I should pray about this.
Because I still don't know what I'm going to do in the fall.
Maybe I'll go to business school here in town because it'll be cheaper and I
can actually afford that.
And the moment I prayed about this, I'm like, God, should I go to Egypt with Jamin? He's like, yes.
(33:56):
And that was it. I'm like, okay, I guess I'm going to go to Egypt.
But up until this point, it was like, okay, I can't make this work on my own.
If I go where God wants me to go, things will just work out way better.
Because when you're in his will and you uh the best place for you to be is in god's will.
So i'm like oh yeah i'm not gonna make that mistake again because it
(34:17):
did not work out yeah so i'm like i guess i'm going to egypt i tell my mom it's
like hey mom guess what going to egypt in the fall and she's like oh hi good
for you so i get because there's with the application there's usually a pastoral reference letter.
So I get the reference letter from YWAM for Avery.
(34:38):
I'm like, awesome. I think this could be a good spot. I open it.
Destination Egypt. I'm like, oh, like that doesn't sound safe at all.
Has he prayed about it? Is this actually the Lord?
I don't know. But totally where God had for you because he takes us out of the comfort zone.
He takes us out of the stuff that is super predictable for us sometimes.
(34:59):
You have talked about surrender Surrender and the idea that like ultimately
asking God, where do you want me to go?
Yeah. And being willing to respond to that. It takes surrender, which is a big deal.
Yeah. I mean, if you want to know where God wants you to go,
you have to, I mean, it's good to plan.
We should never stop planning, but you have to surrender your plans and your will for his will.
(35:21):
Because when you do that, I mean, you'll be surprised where he'll take you.
Yeah. It's incredible. It's incredible.
So you had no idea what to expect. You just knew that God was calling you there.
Like there wasn't even pictures on the website of what the base looked like.
I didn't know if Egyptians spoke Arabic or Egyptian or African.
I'm like, I know nothing about any of this, but let's go. Yeah.
(35:44):
It's a wild adventure. And it's one of those things when you step out just in faith.
And I think like there's people watching that right now, you know,
they're 30, 40, 50, 60 years old. They're like, I would love to do that.
But whatever it is, it's always when you say yes to God and you surrender,
It's always going to be something into the faith zone, something that you can't control and box up.
(36:06):
It's not always Egypt, but it's something that's going to require faith.
And I think whenever God's calling you to something, there's always a way to
rationalize out of that.
That's a side note. We didn't talk about that. Yes. But if God's calling you
to do something, you'll be like, oh, well, that isn't practical right now.
No, we can't actually own a house right now because we want to travel.
(36:26):
Oh, we're not ready for this yet. We can't financially afford this.
Oh, we've got this responsibility and that responsibility.
There's a million things asking for your attention. attention,
but God's like, why don't you put mine first? And then all these other things will come.
Yes. Is that like, I mean, that's scripture, right? Seek first the kingdom,
all these things will be added. Yeah.
(36:46):
I love this. And I think that the restlessness that we feel is a pursuit of,
you know, the things that God has for us.
And until we find it in him, we just maintain that that place of restlessness.
So you end up in Egypt. Okay.
So you said this, I went expecting God to tell me what to do with my life.
(37:07):
Right. So at this point, I still don't know what I'm supposed to do.
I know I'm like kind of skilled at a couple of things, but really I'm like, I'm 20.
I don't really have any sellable skills. Excuse me.
I'm like, God, I'm going to go and you have to tell me what I'm going to do after this.
You have to tell me what I'm supposed to do with with my life because I need to know.
So I went with that expectation. Yeah. And he did tell me what I'm supposed to do with my life.
(37:32):
The atmosphere in a setting like that is, is a setup for that because you're
seeking God and every day you're immersed in him.
They schedule Bible reading time into every morning. So you have no choice but
to read your Bible and pray every morning.
And in that, I mean, it's crazy. God will just like, just talk to you.
Like the God of the universe is just going to talk to you.
(37:53):
And it's something that, I mean, that can happen anywhere, anytime for anybody.
But I think it's like, it's so good when young people take this time before
you've had so much noise from the world to just go, okay, I'm dedicating myself
to what you have to say to me.
And Psalm 37, 4, delight yourself in the Lord. He will give you the desires
of your heart. And you have a... Oh, that is a good verse. Yeah.
(38:16):
He'll give you the desires of your heart. Like we all have desires,
right? He can give you the satisfaction of that, but he can also give you the
desires themselves. Yes.
So if he gives you the desire, that's like, that is mind-blowing because I have
no want or need to go do thing X.
Yes. And God gives you the desire to go do thing X. And then you want to go do the thing, right?
(38:40):
Because he gives you that desire. He gives you the desire. Yes.
So it's connected to surrender. It's connected to God, whatever you have for
me, I want what you have for me.
And in there, we commit ourselves to him and he gives us these desires that
maybe weren't awakened before or we hadn't been aware of before,
but suddenly something starts stirring.
So part of that is your being in Egypt.
(39:02):
Like you hadn't thought of that before, but when it came up.
Egypt for YWAM, Youth With A Mission, is probably the last place I would have chosen to go. Yeah.
But I got there. I'm like, okay, God, yeah, you can tell me what your plan is
for my life now. He's like, Avery, hold on.
It's day two. You're still jet lagged. We've got three months,
four months, five months. Like, hold on. Yeah.
(39:24):
But, yeah. Give me anything. Tell me anything, Lord.
But you look ahead, like the story is interesting because everything about the
discipleship training and whether you go to Bible school or leadership training
school or seven weeks in Asia or whatever,
any of these programs are designed to walk you through the processes of emptying
you of self and making room for God to come in and be in you what he wants to
(39:46):
be and lead you in the path that he has for you.
But the program, I think it might be at every YWAM base. It's all the ones I've
been at, but they have a system.
And one of the weeks is the Father Heart of God. Oh my goodness. That's a good week.
Yeah. That's a good week. And the title triggers a lot of people because of
dad issues. Triggered me.
Yeah. I was looking at the schedule the one day of like what all the weeks are
(40:09):
because every week there's a different topic with a a different speaker and
each speaker is like that's their topic that they talk in there for.
Years so they're very good at so we're like okay character of god good hearing
god's voice good you know evangelizing i'm like oh that's cool yeah and then
the one week was the father heart of god
and i'm like god we don't have to deal with this right now we can we can hold
(40:32):
off on this i don't want to go there right now yeah and you know what he said
he's like get ready i'm like oh okay.
So good. So the week starts and you've got the best possible attitude.
Sarcasm no i so tell us about this week
this week started and like if you know me i
(40:53):
am not like the type of person that's like super artsy or
like here's this visual explanation of this lecture i just want the speaker
to speak and me to write notes and then i've got these nice organized notes
i'm like nice got it but this speaker he was an older guy from switzerland and
he was kind of like like a touchy old guy, you like to hug people.
(41:15):
And I'm like, this is not my speed. This is weird. I don't like this.
The first lecture, he gets us to grab a physical object, to go find an object
around the base that represents our earthly father.
Well, I was kind of dumb. I mean, I was totally not.
How is this any use, right? I mean, some of you, that may be absolutely your speed.
(41:39):
But for me, I was not happy with this. like teach
me the things not the these abstract
objects anyways i go and i
find this broken brick on the ground i'm like oh that's i
was just like wandering around killing time and picked up the brick and then
walked back it's not super meaningful for you you're just not not at that moment
no yeah and then we go around the circle they all share what their object how
(42:03):
their object represents their dad and there's some tears going around and it
gets to me i'm like so i have to come up with something on the spot.
And I'm like, this broken brick is like my dad because he's broken.
He's not being used for anything productive.
And he's just kind of out there alone, rejected, and he's removed himself from everything.
(42:27):
And as I'm saying this, I'm,
After that lecture, my one leader came up to me and he's like,
Avery, when I was in the DTS, I picked the exact same thing for the same reason.
And I'm like, whoa, that's crazy. At this point, it's like a champagne bottle.
(42:50):
The little metal cage is off, the paper is off, and the cork is about to go.
And I'm like, I am not ready for this next lecture today.
So the guy, the speaker, gives me a hug. And in that moment,
it was like totally a God hug. Like it felt different.
I'm like, I almost broke down right there. That was, that was almost the end.
And then I kind of, I let go prematurely and got myself together, walked back to my room.
(43:15):
I'm like, all right, we're good. We're good.
And I walked back to the next lecture and God said, get ready.
And I'm like, okay, okay. Okay, and this lecture, again, was not something I would enjoy.
The speaker, he got us to write a letter to God. I'm like, oh,
(43:37):
that's not so bad. I mean, you know, it's just like writing out a prayer.
And so he wrote out this letter to God. And then he said, flip the page over
and allow him to write a letter back to you.
I'm like, oh, that's dumb. God doesn't speak to us like that. That's ridiculous.
First the brick, now the letter. this is nuts and then i was just like okay
(44:01):
i'll swallow my pride for like two seconds god write what you want to write
and he said avery i love you and i'm proud of you and in that in that moment,
i couldn't even write anymore there was like tears and snot and i was just like
completely overwhelmed with god's presence right in that moment yeah it was
(44:22):
the strongest i've ever felt his presence yeah but it wasn't like oh here's
god it was like my son you've come home right yeah,
and i i kind of i kept kept writing he's
continuing i should have brought the letter actually that would have been good but eventually
it got to the point where i like can't actually see the paper anymore
(44:43):
because there's so many tears the paper's starting to get all
soaked and stuff and it was a mess and at
that point god stopped speaking and
he showed me a vision and it was me and him playing pass in the backyard yeah
and i was like as a father and a son i was like four years old in this and i
(45:04):
throw the ball and i run up and i give him a big hug and i'm like Like, whoa, that's crazy.
Like, he placed, like, gave me this vision of, like, him being the father in my life.
Yeah. The father, he, like, God is the father I never had. Yeah.
And it's incredible because I think the weight of that, whether you have a great
(45:28):
father or absent father or a very harsh father, we all ultimately crave that,
that absolutely perfect,
heart of the father.
Like every good and perfect gift comes from him, right?
That place of belonging. And what I love about it is that everything prior to
this, your God experiences, you're kind of like evaluating, like,
(45:49):
now that I've done this, is this who I am? Is this who I am? Is this who I am?
And in this moment, it's, I love you, and I'm proud of you, and you're doing nothing.
Really. It's not about performance. It's about who you are.
And I think we get the picture of that when Jesus, before he started his ministry, right?
He has to hear that from the Father. The first thing before Jesus does anything
(46:11):
in Matthew is, God, he gets baptized, and when he comes out,
God says, this is my son whom I love, and with him I am well pleased.
And that's very very interesting because God in that moment is affirming Jesus's identity.
And that blew me away because he did the same for me. He'll do the same for you too. Yeah.
Before he's done anything like the gospels haven't even started yet.
(46:33):
And God's like, this is my son whom I love and with him I'm well pleased.
And your father, your earthly father should be proud of you and should love
you and should be pleased with you before you've done anything.
I missed out on that. But even if you have a great father, your heavenly father,
God, he will say, I love you. I'm proud of you.
(46:55):
And with you, I'm well pleased. And light, that starts a fruitful life.
That starts a fruitful life.
And that was like, that was the affirmation of who I am.
Like, I don't have to be a lawyer because, you know, he's already pleased with me. Yeah. Right.
I don't have to seek out all these numbing things because because I know I'm loved.
(47:16):
And I know that I can go anywhere that he calls me to because he has a place
for me. Yeah. You belong somewhere. I belong somewhere.
And this is like, I love that when we were kind of praying and talking about
this before, like it's, you know, like you're 21 years old.
What do I have to say to a 60 year old kind of thing? But it's that,
like we, all of us need to hear that from God.
(47:39):
We crave that. We're searching that place of validation that I belong somewhere,
that I'm loved unconditionally, that I have somewhere to run like that.
That is an internal craving for every single human.
Yeah. And what's so interesting is like, God will show you your identity,
who he made you to be before he tells you what to do.
(48:00):
I, what I was doing is I was trying to place my identity in the purpose itself.
Yes. And God was like, no, it's two separate things. This is who you are and you do this.
Not, I do this, this is who I am. So the purpose comes out of identity.
The purpose comes out of the identity. Yes. Yes.
It's so good. You say once identity is set, you are grounded.
(48:21):
Yes. What does grounded mean to you? Well, for me, I was kind of trying to put
my identity in all these different things, trying to find something that would stick.
And when God affirmed my identity, which he will do for you,
you know who you are and you know who God made you to be.
Even if you don't know yourself that well yet, you know that you're loved.
(48:43):
So you can step out and take on more risks because you have this base that you're operating from.
Right. And if you make a mistake, it's not the end of the world because you're loved. You're loved.
Yeah. And I think that's interesting. We actually, in our province this week,
week, there's been all kinds of political hoo-ha about identities and various
(49:03):
things and what we are allowing and what we are not allowing and what's the
age at which you can decide who you are and what you're about.
And I think it's interesting that like you say when you were.
I'm going to be a lawyer and the people around you were like,
that's awesome. We're supportive, whatever.
And it feels good. And so you run towards it. A little bit of confirmation bias too. Yeah, of course.
(49:24):
And like, everybody's trying to put their identity in something, right?
And for some people, it just happens to be a politically charged subject.
Totally. Right? And if that's the case, you have no shortage of people who will
come alongside and support that. That is dangerous.
That is very dangerous. So the word validated, like we've talked about that,
that identity and the purpose, it's connected to a validation.
(49:48):
And essentially our society right now and your generation is craving validation, right?
The identity issue is leading to, I need to be validated.
And dictionary definition of that is to prove that something is acceptable.
Yes. So in other words, they want to know I'm acceptable.
Like you were saying that like at least 50% of my generation has divorced parents
(50:12):
and has an absent father in some way, right?
And of course, when you're not fathered, you don't know how to a father so it
makes sense it's just a broken sinful society that's what we live in but the
father's job is to validate you yes right so everybody's trying to find that something,
and then they can't find it anywhere but because it's look inside exactly find
(50:35):
find out who you are it's like look i'm going to look inside myself and figure out who i am well.
You're not looking in the right spot. Yeah. Right. You look to God because he
made you and he will tell you who you are.
It's like if you got a brand new Honda Civic, you're like, hmm,
it's pretty nice Honda Civic.
But the manufacturer is going to tell you, oh, that's a 1.7 liter engine.
(50:56):
It's a five speed standard.
It's got all these different things. And its purpose is to go from zero to 60 in like 12 seconds.
I mean, it's not that fast, but it's the manufacturer determines the identity.
Which reveals the purpose. purpose. If the car itself was to look inside itself,
it'd be like, oh, I'm an engine. So I'm supposed to burn gasoline.
(51:16):
That's my purpose. That's my identity. That's who I am.
No, no, not at all. The manufacturer determined your identity, determines who you are.
And then from there tells you what to do. So good. So good.
So St. Augustine, one of my favorite quotes is, you have made us for yourself,
oh Lord, and our heart is restless until it rests in you.
And that that to me is just
(51:38):
that thing it's that restlessness of what am i about what's
my purpose why am i here what you know you were running towards stuff
because of that it's meant to find itself in you yep
you've got a quote i've got one of your
faves as well i actually didn't write it down it's on my phone but
it's by this christian rapper spoken
word type of guy name is goes by by propaganda song
(52:00):
is called lofty and it says well
my favorite line in the whole song it just gives me
chills i like re-listen to that part of the song on repeat but it's
but worth value and beauty is not determined by some inequality but by the length
for which the owner would go to possess them and you look at the cross god went
(52:21):
the ultimate length just to
possess you so good So you belong somewhere because God found you. Yeah.
Yeah. So that place, so good.
That place of purpose is, you had phrased it.
Do what I put in you to do and use what I already put in you.
Right. So after the Father Heart of God week, after this week,
(52:46):
I'm like, okay, what now?
And then God was like, do what I put in you to do.
I'm like, wait, you're not going to call me to do something that I hate right now?
You're not going to tell me to become a full-time missionary in some country I've never heard of?
Right he's like no do what i put in you to do and for
(53:09):
me that was god highlighted i've always
been into business stuff i mean i was shoveling snow and
mowing lawns for as long as i can remember so good and
then also speaking because then i'm like oh i kind of i kind of like speaking
so these two things god was like do those things and it's not god didn't say
you're gonna have to take this amount of money and you're gonna have to go invest
(53:30):
it with this bank and you're gonna going to have to get this type of loan to
start this type of business. And he'll direct your steps, of course.
But it's like, do this.
And there's so much security in that because, you know, I know who I am and
I know what God put in me to do.
So it gives you room to risk. Yeah. It gives you room to dream.
Gives you room to dream. Right. Now that I, business, I like that.
(53:54):
That's cool. I can dream in that direction now.
Right. And now as I'm moving in this direction, it's kind of like going this
way, but God's just directing every little step.
Yeah, I love that. I think it's huge.
So just as we wrap up, this is like the big thing.
But you had said you believe God is waiting for us to surrender.
(54:18):
God is waiting for you to say yes to him. And that's not a salvation message, although it could be.
It's am i gonna give my life to god so that he will in turn give me a better
life because it's life with him yeah and the fact that you're breathing this
is a quote from rex crane i was given a audio clip of this guy i didn't even
(54:41):
know who he was from 2012 which is like ages ago,
but he said the fact that you're breathing is proof that god needs something out of you.
Yeah so he put something in all of us
right and our job is to you
know do that yeah so good
and i love how this whole thing roots back to like that engagement with god
(55:05):
calling you out on who you are in him like that that place of the father heart
this reminds me ephesians 3 um when paul is writing and he says for this reason
i bow my knees to the father of our lord jesus christ and specifically to the
Father of our Lord Jesus Christ,
from whom the whole family in heaven and earth is named, that he would grant
you, according to the riches of his glory, to be strengthened with might through
(55:29):
his Spirit in the inner man.
Like that whole process, right? Isn't that beautiful? Through the spirit in the inner man,
that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith and that you being rooted
and grounded in love may be able to comprehend with all the saints what is the
width and the length and the depth and the height to know the love of Christ,
(55:50):
which passes knowledge that you may be filled with all the fullness of God.
Like that's pretty much what you're describing. To be rooted and grounded in
his love. Rooted and grounded, right? Bam. Bam.
So walking testimony of this. Verse 20, now to him who is able to do exceedingly
abundantly above all that we ask or think according to his power that works
(56:10):
in us, to him be glory in the church by Christ Jesus to all generations.
So it literally is saying that the fruitfulness of our lives,
what he's going to do, the exceedingly abundantly according to the power that
works in us is rooted and grounded in love, which we find in the Father.
It's so simple, but so profound. on. Yes, it is.
(56:31):
Because there's noise and everything going on. You think, I have to find myself
and that's going to be complicated.
And this person says this and this person says this. Yeah. But God's love is
just the common denominator.
Yeah. It's the root of your entire equation.
Yeah. And if you have that, you have everything. You've got everything.
Okay. So last, last thing here. If there's one thing you want people to know
(56:54):
about life with Jesus, what do you want their takeaway to be?
If you haven't found your identity
yet, yet God's got it. He's waiting for you to come to him to find it.
God's waiting for you to say yes to him so he can show you who he made you to be.
Yeah, man, so good. Isn't that great?
Well, we're, we are so proud of you, Avery. And I'm so, so excited to see what God's got for you.
(57:20):
10, 15, 20 years down the road as well. I think a lot of us who are maybe a
little further down the path, I think that that would be the one thing that
we would pray over this generation is that early on,
there would be a revelation of who Jesus is and what He really says about who
you are and the value that is in you, the value of the life that you live,
(57:43):
that it really isn't meant to be dissected and evaluated through the lens of flesh,
but it is meant to be evaluated through the love of God.
So, would you pray for the congregation this morning?
We're going to have the worship team come close us off. Father,
I just thank you for just this opportunity to speak today.
And I pray that you will...
(58:05):
Speak into the lives of each and every one of us, God.
I pray that you would find the one thing that we're trying to find purpose and
meaning in and you would replace that with you.
God, I just bless everybody here and I pray that you would just rock their world.
God, I pray that you would completely change their understanding of love and
(58:28):
what it means to be a son or a daughter of you. you.
So God, I just bless this congregation, bless these people in Jesus' name. Amen. Amen. Amen.
Thank you, Avery. Thank you.
So good. Thanks again for tuning in to The Light Show.
If you have any questions, would like to access our online resources,
(58:51):
or want to support this ministry, you can visit us at www.victorygp.com.
You can also text to give.
Just text 587-207-4387 and follow the promptings.
If you're on YouTube, Facebook, Instagram, or TikTok, we'd love if you'd come and join us there.
We hope you'll join us again for the next episode of The Light Show.
(59:13):
Remember, we overcome by the blood of the Lamb and the word of our testimony.
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