Introduction to Inner Work: What it’s not, what it is, and how it can help you turn your “inner bully” into a trusted ally

Podcast Title: Inner Work Coaching

Host: Mercy Rice

Mission = To help you turn your “inner bully” into a trusted ally through:

• Applying simple & practical self-coaching tools
• Offering Faith-based encouragement & resources
• Learning to uncover your God-given purpose
• Understanding the value of creating intentional connections

Episode #1

Title: Introduction to Inner Work: What it’s not, what it is, and how it can help you turn your “inner bully” into a trusted ally

Tags: inner work, inner bully, inner critic, self-coaching, self-awareness, self-image

Training notes:

1. Have you ever wondered why you react a certain way when you’re in conflict, what prompts you to say things you may not have wanted to say, or why something so seemingly random causes you to lose your temper? You’ll uncover the answers to these questions as you learn how to do your inner work. What is that? Well, first lets talk about what it’s not. Working on understanding yourself and learning how to flip the script on your inner bully does not take the place of mental or spiritual health care. It DOES act as a complimentary practice that is essential for putting to work the things we learn in therapy and by studying the Bible
2. I like to think of inner work as cleaning out a filter.
3. Imagine with me, if you will, that your emotional system is like an air filter. It grabs all the debris that floats toward us and stores it. What comes out of our mouth is (usually) a filtered response. We react how we think it’s socially acceptable to respond in each situation.

But...

Internally, we continue to store the feelings our filter collects - grief, anger, elation, excitement, frustration, embarrassment, judgement, relief - it all gets filed away. Eventually, those clogged up feelings will find ways to express themselves. It’s usually not pretty - or productive.

4. I created this visual of an internal filter when I started learning about my communication style through an assessment, I use with my leadership development and coaching clients. It’s called the Everything DiSC Communication style assessment and my results showed me how I tend to react under stress, in conflict, and when I’m operating in my sweet spot. The assessment results also showed me that not everyone sees the world like I do (gasp!) A quick example of that would be – I would describe myself as enthusiastic and I think that’s an important trait because I bring energy, fresh ideas, and encouragement to a project at work or an event with friends & family. People who communicate differently than I do, who may see the world differently than I do, may see my enthusiasm as “over the top”, “fake”, or being “overly positive.” Certainly not the message I want to convey and it’s important that I know that each person will perceive me differently, based on their experiences, beliefs, and how they view the world.
5. This awareness has helped me in several ways. It has helped me become more intentional in seeking to understand others and to be understood. It’s also given me an opportunity to examine my initial tendencies and reactions. As a result, I decided to coach myself with the skills and techniques I use to coach my clients. I look forward to sharing all of these awesome skills with you to help you on this inner work journey.
6. The skill for today is helping you identify your preferred communication style. I want you to ask yourself the following 3 questions:

• When I speak, am I fast paced or is my pace more moderate and reserved?
• When I make decisions, do I prioritize process, facts & logic or do I think more about how the decisions will affect the people involved?
• Do I think to talk, or do I talk to think?

Understanding these 3 things about yourself will give you increased awareness ab