June 18, 2025 • 27 mins
In this deeply personal and heartfelt season finale, Lisa and Gretchen reflect on the powerful conversations, courageous stories, and vital resources shared across 15 transformative episodes. They celebrate the community built, the lessons learned, and the shared mission to end the stigma around mental health and suicide.
🎥 Watch the Video Podcast on YouTubeA video version of this episode is available here: 📺 YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@TheSurvivorsPodcastChannel
🎙️ This episode is proudly brought to you by Schoser Talent and Wellness SolutionsStruggling with burnout, turnover, or overwhelmed by change in your organization? Schoser Talent and Wellness Solutions can help with holistic strategies that support both talent acquisition and mental wellness. Learn more: 🌐 https://schosersolutions.com/
📝 Episode SummaryLisa and Gretchen close out Season One by revisiting their incredible journey together—from how they met and the formation of their unique podcast, to the raw and vulnerable stories they've shared. They celebrate the lives touched, the stigma broken, and the love and support of their growing community. This is more than a podcast—it’s a movement, and this finale captures every beat of its heart.
🎧 Lessons Learned- Talking about suicide saves lives—and it’s okay to use humor and humanity to heal.
- Everyone processes mental health differently; empathy, not judgment, opens the door to support.
- Sharing personal stories unlocks others' courage to share their own.
- There's no one-size-fits-all approach to therapy; explore what works for you.
- Building safe spaces fosters healing and reduces isolation.
0:00 – Opening Message & Content Warning 1:00 – A Season of Growth & Gratitude 3:30 – How Lisa & Gretchen Met: The Podmatch Connection 6:00 – The Power of Shared Stories 8:45 – Why These Conversations Matter 12:00 – Highlights from Our Guest Episodes 17:00 – Mental Health Awareness Month Reflections 20:00 – Pride Month & LGBTQ+ Mental Health 22:30 – Recognizing Warning Signs of Suicide 25:00 – A Love Letter to the Community 27:00 – Final Reflections & Hope for Season Two
📚 Resources for Mental Health & Support🔹 The Survivors Podcast Website – https://thesurvivors.net/ 🔹 The HelpHUB™ – Mental health resources, tools, and support networks – https://www.thehelphub.co/ 🔹 Schoser Talent and Wellness Solutions – Mental wellness coaching & support – https://schosersolutions.com/ 🔹 Sh!t That Goes On In Our Heads – A raw, award-winning mental health podcast – https://goesoninourheads.net/
📲 Follow & Connect With Us📷 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/the_survivors_podcast 🔗 LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/the-survivors-podcast 🎥 YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@TheSurvivorsPodcastChannel
🎙️ See You Next Week!Stay strong, keep going, and remember: You are enough. 💜
#TheSurvivorsPodcast #EndTheStigma #MentalHealthMatters #SuicidePrevention #YouAreNotAlone #BreakTheSilence #GriefSupport #988Lifeline #SurvivorStories #HealingTogether #PodMatch #MentalHealth #SuicideAwareness #Podcast #Community #Hope #Grief #Stigma #MentalIllness #Support #LisaSugarman #GretchenSchoser
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:01):
The Survivors is brought to you by our friends at schoser talent and wellness
solutions. This podcast mentions suicide, mental illness,
grief and loss and may be triggering for some listeners. So please
take care of your mental well being by pausing or skipping any sections
that feel uncomfortable to you. And if you or someone you know is struggling, please
call 988 for support. I can't believe
(00:23):
we're here. At this point, I am dumbfounded
that we have recorded a full season of
our podcast together. I know it's kind of crazy,
and for two people that have known each other not
even a year and like, we are already like, best buddies
and talking about a really hard subject, but making
(00:45):
waves, too. Yeah, we're definitely, I think, making waves. I mean, we certainly are
getting enough feedback from all over the world to support that,
which feels official. Amazing. And we know people are tuning in because
we get to see behind the curtain and we, we see how many of you
are out there listening to us on the regular and commenting and
sharing episodes. And it just is the most beautiful feeling in the
(01:08):
world to know that people are paying attention to this conversation. Because that's the whole
point. That's been our whole point, for sure. And the emails that we've
gotten and the reviews and comments on our
posts, it warms my heart that people want
to learn more, want to help more, and want to make
talking about suicide not such a horrible
(01:30):
conversation. I mean, and the irony is,
it's something that every single one of us somehow, some way
will be touched by eventually. If you haven't been, you know, this is kind of
how we started our conversation. Like, if you haven't been touched by this yet,
wait a minute. Because you will be. And then when you are, at
least you'll understand it. At least you'll know what to
(01:53):
do, how to help. If it's yourself that's struggling, if it's someone
you care about that's struggling, at least if you've been paying attention to what we've
been talking about this first season, you'll have some
tools in the toolbox. And, and you. And you can help.
You can help yourself and you can help other people. So this, this is kind
of fun. Like, I'm. I'm excited for this episode because in front
(02:14):
of me, and I know in front of you, because I just emailed it to
you, is our calendar from season one.
And I have all of these episodes that we've already recorded
and, and by now have been released. And I just think
of how much incredible conversation has taken place in the last
15 weeks from never having recorded a single thing ever
(02:36):
together, except for my appearance on your
other podcast, which I will plug right now. It's called Shit that
Goes on in Our Heads. You and Don't Dirty Skittles taking over the world one
mental health conversation at a time. Because of that and because of our friends
at Pod Match that helped to make that connection possible,
we're sitting here right now at the very end of our own first season of
(02:58):
our own spinoff podcast, and it just gives me the
most joy. Like, I want to hug you so badly right now, but I can't
because I break my computer screen. Because you're, you're on a screen right now.
It's so sad. Just come on through. I know, I know you want to. Just
look at it. I know. I, I, I would love to. I would love. But
we're going to see each other in person soon enough. So let's do the fun
thing, which is to recap our whole
(03:22):
first season of the Survivors. So. Oh, look at you with the,
with the emojis again with the hearts. I love that. That makes me so happy.
So we start. Oh, now it's confetti. This is incredible. It's like a ticker tape
parade. So episode one, we talked very in depth about our
origin story. How you and I came to be here,
how we met, how we found each other in the world,
(03:44):
and how we realized that we had so much in
common with each other. How you and I
met was absolutely crazy. But I'm a
huge believer in fate, and we were supposed to meet and
how that pre interview for shit that goes on in our heads
lasted almost two hours. Typically those are like maybe half an
(04:07):
hour. But we just kept talking and we just had
this great synergy between the two of us, and we
built another beautiful podcast based on our
lived experiences. Yeah. And I do believe as much now, more
so now, even now that we've finished our whole first season. I believe it even
more now that there is not a community out there quite
(04:29):
like ours. There is not a platform out there quite like
ours that not only focuses on suicide
and having those conversations and talking about the really nuanced
kind of grief that's attached to that kind of loss. But it's
also a place where two different kinds of survivors like, who's out there?
Two different kinds of survivors like this, with our kind of lived experience of
(04:51):
being an attempt survivor on your side and my side being a multiple
suicide loss survivor. And I'm also on crisis lifelines and we're both advocates.
It's like we have this complete circle of
experience. Not experience we either of us wish that we had, but we
have it. And what I love more than anything about our
relationship is that you and I match each other's energy so well,
(05:13):
and we always have, since the minute we started talking to each other last
year. And we both have the singular goal
of normalizing these conversations so that people can just
talk about the shit that's weighing them down and that they're dealing with
and not feel stigmatized anymore. And I've never met anybody
that matched my energy like that before. Yeah, you are a
(05:36):
little fireball. But, you know, the other thing that we need to remember, too, is,
like, a lot of the podcasts that are out there are very clinical. Ours are
not clinical by any means. And, yes, we may laugh about
some stuff that's not really that funny, but levativity is part
of healing and acknowledging that it's okay to laugh.
You know, hindsight is 20 20. I will tell you, in my own little journ
(05:58):
journey, I can go back and laugh at some of the shit that happened right
before I made that phone call. But, you know, I got to share that in
my story, and you got to share your story, and it was so beautiful
and so eloquent when you shared your story. I'm not a big crier
lately, but, like, every time you and I get together, I cry more and more.
So it's something about you. You're just a softie. It's not me. You're just.
(06:20):
You're just a highly sensitive and emotional human that you have
a huge. A huge heart. So, you know, it doesn't surprise me that we're both
like that. And, you know, I love the fact that, you know, first.
Our first episode was obviously our origin story, which is how we got together.
And we already just shared a little bit about that. We met because of this
app that is like a dating app for podcasters and guests that got
(06:42):
us together called Pod Match. And I got invited to speak on your
podcast, and the rest is. Is kind of history at this point. We. We
just had an instant connection, and now we're sitting behind the
mic together every week doing something we love. And then we
had my story. Episode two was my story about
losing my father, my cousin, and one of my closest childhood friends to suicide
(07:04):
and learning that my father had taken his life 35 years
after he died. That was a twist that nobody
saw coming. And then we hopped over to your story, and episode
three was, you Just being so unbelievably vulnerable
and honest about how hard things were for you, and
they were. Since I started telling my story, I have had a few friends
(07:26):
drop off, because for them, for somebody to be that
vulnerable or talk about the things that I talk about,
suicide, mental health, like, it scares people, and they
dropped out of the. Out of my life. But there's a reason
and a season for friends. But I know in
my heart I'm doing the right thing, and that's all the validation I need.
(07:48):
Absolutely. And you know what? No fault to them either, because what you're
talking about and what we're talking about, like, it's hard. It's hard and it's
scary. And even though you don't maybe want it to be, it
can be off putting for a lot of people who don't know how to handle
it. So you did what you needed to do in talking about
it and being open and honest about it, and that's what saved your life. And
(08:10):
those people who may have dropped out of your life were doing what they
needed to do to protect themselves. So it's like, there's no fault, no harm, no
foul all the way around. And the point is that you're. You're
here and you're thriving, and you are the poster
Child for the 988 Crisis and Suicide
lifeline, which I love, because I think. I think we should start putting your face
(08:31):
on all the billboards around the country. Be like G. Call
988. Be like G. Oh, that was your first snort of the season.
That's so cute.
See, we started the season laughing, and we're ending the season. I
can't with you, and. No, nobody needs to see
my short little body. Short little head on a billboard.
(08:52):
No, look, I think that you. I think that you would
create a groundswell of people wanting to. To
call because you're so endearing and adorable and sweet. I think. I
think you're. I think you would. You'd fire people up
to want to help themselves. You know,
(09:13):
we moved from sharing our stories just to kind of lay the foundation for this
whole. This whole podcast. We moved right
into why these conversations matter, which I think was such a
perfect place to start, because that's what we're doing. We're having these
conversations, and they matter. And we spent
an entire episode talking about why that is.
(09:35):
And it's simple, right? We spent a half an hour talking about it, but at
the end of the day, it's really simple. When you talk about these
things, you Create safe spaces to have these
hard conversations. And you give people permission to be
vulnerable and honest and share what's going on on the
inside so that people can be better equipped to help
(09:56):
themselves and to help each other. And also, as we share our
journeys and our stories, every time we talk about it, we unlock somebody
else's pr. Sharing our journeys, sharing
our resources, sharing what's out there gives people some,
some tools, some coping tools. Because like, like
you and I both had, suicide's not like the funnest
(10:20):
topic to talk about, but it happens every day.
And that's why it's important that we talk
about it. It's important that we talk
about it not just with our friends and our family, but the world and on
LinkedIn and with businesses and with
schools and kids. It's a fact of life. It does
(10:42):
happen. And there's so many resources out there that people can
use to maybe save their life. Well, like we can't save them
all. We can at least try to give them the
resources that they need for that very moment. Yeah,
exactly. Exactly. One of the
beautiful conversations that we had that we were fortunate was a two part
(11:04):
conversation was our time that we got to spend
with Janine Ellenberg from our sponsor Calmry.
She's the chief medical officer of Calmri and
the founder of Behaviorance. What a,
what a rich and powerful conversation over that
two part that was episode six and seven. What a powerful
(11:27):
conversation with someone who has got so much clinical experience,
so much lived experience, so much professional experience,
not only as a therapist, but,
you know, kind of behind the curtain on that, that
real clinical side. And we just had such
deep conversations about how to tell when people are
(11:49):
struggling and the importance of taking care of the
people around you and the importance of prioritizing mental
health and the importance of equalizing mental illness and
recognizing it as an illness. Like, I mean, if you haven't already listened to
those two episodes, episode six and seven, go listen to them. Because
Janine offers such a rich perspective on
(12:12):
everything that we're talking about here. And she's just so incredibly eloquent
and lovely and we just wanted to hug her the entire time. That's so true.
And it's not just like her lived experiences, but she's a mom
too. And the importance of telehealth and the
importance of empathy and kindness and let's try and make the
world a better place. There's, there's a lot going on in the world right now
(12:34):
and empathy and kindness go a really long way. And just
reminding people of how important that is. Yeah, yeah, we've done
that. Well, that's been a constant theme. I mean, we've done that in, you know,
regardless of whatever it is that we've been talking about on any given week, we
always circle back to that because that's at the heart part of what we,
we need people to realize. It's how we engage with each other
(12:55):
and support each other that will change this whole narrative that
you and I are working so hard with so many other people to change. So
it's, it's just been, it's just been such
a, a full season. Just. It's gone by too fast, I think
for sure. I mean, episode eight, we debunked the
whole stigma around suicide, which is what we continue to
(13:18):
do. I mean, we definitely had an episode dedicated to it, but we,
we, we do that in every single conversation that we
have because, look, suicide has been
this scary monster in everybody's
imagination and hearts forever. It's something that nobody wants to
pay attention to and nobody wants to be affected by.
(13:41):
And we need to understand that the root of it all is just a
mental illness, which is just an illness which is something that can be treated and
something that can be positively impacted.
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(14:03):
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(14:48):
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Hopefully we've done some positive work in breaking
apart the stigma so that people don't have to feel like it's taboo
(15:10):
anymore. And you know, we've provided really good resources for people,
right, that they probably had never heard of before and can
use today. It's stuff they can print up, they can put in their phone and
you know, talking about suicide shouldn't be any different than talking
about mental health or talking about what your plans are for the
(15:31):
weekend. We all go through things and our brains are all
wired differently. And giving somebody crap
because they talked about committing suicide is probably the
shittiest thing you could ever do.
There's a lot that goes into that thought process. Think twice
before you speak and use the resources that we put out there
(15:52):
and put yourself in their shoes and kind of figure
out like, kind of what, what they were going through. Yeah, yeah, it's.
It's. It's important to. To just put judgment aside. It's important
to just validate everybody's experience for that person's experience.
Like, you know how when you're in a conversation with someone and you say something
and it really hits the person the wrong way and you're like, oh, whoa, whoa,
(16:13):
whoa, whoa, I didn't mean that. I didn't mean that. Well, okay, maybe you didn't
mean that, but it still had the impact it had on that
person because that's how they internalized it. Well, mental illness is the
same way. Depression. Depression is the same way. What might depress you might not
depress me, and vice versa. It's. All of this stuff is so
subjective. So we need to be gentle with people and we need to
(16:35):
give ourselves permission to feel the way that we feel without judging
ourselves and bitching at ourselves. And like you said,
same thing. Don't do it with other people. Just have some respect
that whatever the person is going through is something
big for them. And we just never know what's going on behind somebody
else's curtain. But, you know, like you said, we spent an awful lot of time
(16:58):
this season giving out an awful lot of what I hope, what you hope
will be resources that people will use and we'll start to
access and share. We spent four consecutive weeks,
episode 9, 10, 11, and 12. We talked about
so many different things relating to Mental Health Awareness Month. That was,
you know, how fortunate for us that our first season fell right in the middle
(17:20):
of that. Those were such great conversations too.
We talked about the importance of self care. We talked about
the crisis lines. We talked about the importance of therapy.
All really good things. But if you're not doing those
things, then you could fall into some of those
(17:40):
behaviors that you. You would talk negatively to yourself
about. Right. So, like, my big thing every day
is check under the hood, make sure that I'm good, make sure I'm
sticking with my therapy, make sure that I'm, you know,
checking in with my friends, checking with Myself stopping
the negative self talk because that is just not a good place to
(18:03):
go and sharing the virtues of therapy. Right. Like,
some people see it as a negative thing, but for me, there's so many
different types of therapy you can have, and I incorporate them
all. I do art therapy, I do eft, I do
energy therapy, I do nature therapy only when it's not
snowing. And I. It's helped my mental health. And
(18:25):
like you said, how crazy it was that we got to, you know, do our
first mental health awareness month. Yeah, yeah. And then. And then
that slid us right into Pride Month, which, again,
for. For both of us who are members of the
LGBTQ community. What a joy to be
able to talk about that on this platform because
(18:47):
we've already talked about this so many different times. We are in a
very precarious time right now in the world.
It's a challenging time to be a human on this
planet. Certainly challenging to be
in this country at the moment. Even more challenging to be part of a
marginalized community within this, this country. And
(19:10):
when you're talking about Pride Month, you want to talk about the
celebrations and the excitement and
the showering of love, but you have to also acknowledge
that there's another side of it that's really been amplified
this year during pride, which is the struggle
that has intensified for the queer community
(19:33):
and how the queer community's mental health
is being so negatively impacted by the state of the
world right now, more so even than a lot of other populations,
unfortunately. So we got to talk about that, and we got to
share a lot of our own lived experience, and we got to share a lot
of our own resources. You know, I. I spend a lot of my time on
(19:54):
the Trevor Project Crisis lifelines. I got to talk a lot about that and. And
the benefits and virtues of that. You got to talk about your own coming out
story. And we both did. And it's just so much pride. Goodness that was so
good. Makes me happy that we can talk about
this openly and once again give people really good
resources like PFLAG and free mom hugs. Like, I
(20:16):
just want to give all sorts of free mom hugs to everybody, but we
get to have these really serious conversations.
But it warms my heart that we get to do this and hopefully our
messages reach the people that need to hear them and that people
are listening and taking this seriously and, you know, making those
checklists and things that they need on a day to day basis. I really
(20:38):
hope so. You and I have been very intentional about
the kinds of things that We've shared the kinds of resources, the kinds
of topics that we've brought up on this platform. And
the whole purpose is to just elevate the whole conversation and
make it acceptable and put resources on
top of everybody's minds so that if you're struggling or if
(21:01):
someone you know is struggling, you know what to do or you have an idea
of what to do, you've got something in your back pocket that you can pull
out that can help you. Once we. We slid out of Pride
month, we. We started talking about warning signs, one of our last
episodes. In fact, last week, our. Our last episode before this
one, kind of. This whole season kind of culminated, I feel like, with
(21:24):
that conversation about warning signs that someone
you know is struggling and what to do. I mean, this is the survivors
po. This community that you and I are building is a community of people who
have in some way shape or form been touched by
suicide or mental illness, grief, loss, all
attached to that one issue of
(21:46):
suicide. And one of the biggest things in
preventing any of that from happening is understanding what the
signs are. And you and I talked about that. How do you tell when
something's off with someone? How do you reach the extroverted people
who keep all that hidden? How do you confront someone
when you know they're not okay or you suspect they're not okay? Like, what do
(22:07):
you say? What do you do? We did that last week, and I feel
so good about what we said and how we said it and the
resources that we offered. Because if. If one person from
this entire season of you and I sitting here and having these conversations, if
one single person can be helped
or the direction they were headed in can change for
(22:30):
the better because of our conversation. Well, didn't that make every minute just
worth it? It sure does. I'm. I'm
super grateful for you. I'm super grateful for your mind and
your time and your insight and being able to
do this and really make an impact out there for our
listeners. There's just so much more that we can do, like
(22:52):
repurposing our content to maybe create an ebook on some
resources and things like that so that people have something tangible to hold
up. Holding their hand. Life is short. And
knowing that you are not alone in this world and that there are
people and places that can help you move
from like that one minute to the next. That's everything.
(23:15):
And love the community that we have built. And I love the fact
that we have this amazing website that people can come out to and,
you know, you can leave us A voicemail. Send us an email. We would love
to hear from our listeners of,
like, what more would you like to hear from us? From our
perspectives? And it's. Our website is the
(23:37):
survivors.net and I can't thank my
co host enough for her amazing,
amazing mind. Well, I mean, now you're. I spent the last two
episodes before this making you cry. Now you're making me get all
emotional. We've talked a lot this season about how you and I
clicked so fast and how we started, you
(23:58):
know, saying I love you right after the first or second conversation that we
had, which was so unusual and felt so normal. And
we talk, what, 65 times a day, probably. We talk or we
text. Feels like that. Yes. Yeah. I feel like I talk to you on the
telephone more than I talk to even my own mother. And that says a lot.
And it's like you have truly become family to
(24:20):
me. I mean, I said it earlier, you match each other's energy
in so many ways. And I'm so grateful for your
willingness to have these conversations and your energy around
it and just. You have one of the biggest, most
beautiful hearts that I have ever, ever come
across in a human. And my life is so much
(24:42):
richer because you're a part of it now. See,
I see you. I see it. There it is. I made you cry. It's okay.
You're okay. You're okay. But suffice it all to say that
this has been a dream come true for me, and it's. It's been a gift.
Now I'm fully crying. If you're watching this YouTube video now, I'm, like, full
on crying. You are a gift. And so is this. This podcast the
(25:05):
same. And thank you to our listeners who stuck with us for
15 episodes. I can't wait for season two. We have so
many other things that we're going to talk about, and we're going to really dig
deep. And if there's a subject you want us to touch on
from both of our perspectives, please go to the website, leave us
a voicemail or email. We want to hear from you.
(25:27):
And just please, everybody remember, you are enough. You are
wanted, you are loved. And the world's a better place because you're here.
Yeah, I second all of that. And I. I'll. I'll
leave you with this one last message. We've worked really,
really hard, you and I, this, this season, to build
something special, to build a community where people who are
(25:50):
dealing with suicide. Look, There are over 92 million
people in this world every year who are somehow
touched by suicide. And we are trying to create a community
where those people can come together and get the support, support
and the resources and the guidance and the sense of
community that you need in whatever way you need
(26:12):
it. So this whole experience this season has been a gift. I
cannot wait to come back for season two and do it all over
again and have even more impactful conversations than the
ones we've already had. Thanks for being here. Everybody listening.
Supporting G. I just love you. I love you so much. I love you
more. And I have one little thing for you. Let me go get it. Here
(26:35):
we go. I got some heart. I heart you. You
heart me. So if you're. If you're just listening to this in the last couple
of episodes, she has found her emojis button on our
riverside recording studio and now is is doing confetti
and hearts for everything. So she just gave me lots of hearts. So
we will end today and we will end this season with
(26:56):
all the hearts and all the love and we will come back re
energized for season two. We'll see you soon. See you soon.
Thanks for joining us on the survivors. Remember, no matter how tough things
feel, you are enough and the world needs you just the way you are.
You're not alone in this journey. There's a community here and every step forward
counts. We're so grateful you took the time to listen and we hope you'll
(27:19):
take one day at a time. Just know there's always more light ahead.
Thanks for being here. Friends, just remember, help is out there in
so many different places. So if you or someone you know is struggling,
please call 988 and a trained crisis counselor like me will be
there to help. You can also find an inclusive and comprehensive directory of
(27:39):
mental health resources, tools and content@thehelphub
co. Just remember that help is always just a call or a
click away. We'll catch you next week. In the meantime, keep surviving.
The Survivors is brought to you by our friends at schoser talent and wellness
solutions. This podcast mentions suicide, mental illness,
grief and loss and may be triggering for some listeners. So please
take care of your mental well being by pausing or skipping any sections
that feel uncomfortable to you. And if you or someone you know is struggling, please
call 988 for support. I can't believe
(00:23):
we're here. At this point, I am dumbfounded
that we have recorded a full season of
our podcast together. I know it's kind of crazy,
and for two people that have known each other not
even a year and like, we are already like, best buddies
and talking about a really hard subject, but making
(00:45):
waves, too. Yeah, we're definitely, I think, making waves. I mean, we certainly are
getting enough feedback from all over the world to support that,
which feels official. Amazing. And we know people are tuning in because
we get to see behind the curtain and we, we see how many of you
are out there listening to us on the regular and commenting and
sharing episodes. And it just is the most beautiful feeling in the
(01:08):
world to know that people are paying attention to this conversation. Because that's the whole
point. That's been our whole point, for sure. And the emails that we've
gotten and the reviews and comments on our
posts, it warms my heart that people want
to learn more, want to help more, and want to make
talking about suicide not such a horrible
(01:30):
conversation. I mean, and the irony is,
it's something that every single one of us somehow, some way
will be touched by eventually. If you haven't been, you know, this is kind of
how we started our conversation. Like, if you haven't been touched by this yet,
wait a minute. Because you will be. And then when you are, at
least you'll understand it. At least you'll know what to
(01:53):
do, how to help. If it's yourself that's struggling, if it's someone
you care about that's struggling, at least if you've been paying attention to what we've
been talking about this first season, you'll have some
tools in the toolbox. And, and you. And you can help.
You can help yourself and you can help other people. So this, this is kind
of fun. Like, I'm. I'm excited for this episode because in front
(02:14):
of me, and I know in front of you, because I just emailed it to
you, is our calendar from season one.
And I have all of these episodes that we've already recorded
and, and by now have been released. And I just think
of how much incredible conversation has taken place in the last
15 weeks from never having recorded a single thing ever
(02:36):
together, except for my appearance on your
other podcast, which I will plug right now. It's called Shit that
Goes on in Our Heads. You and Don't Dirty Skittles taking over the world one
mental health conversation at a time. Because of that and because of our friends
at Pod Match that helped to make that connection possible,
we're sitting here right now at the very end of our own first season of
(02:58):
our own spinoff podcast, and it just gives me the
most joy. Like, I want to hug you so badly right now, but I can't
because I break my computer screen. Because you're, you're on a screen right now.
It's so sad. Just come on through. I know, I know you want to. Just
look at it. I know. I, I, I would love to. I would love. But
we're going to see each other in person soon enough. So let's do the fun
thing, which is to recap our whole
(03:22):
first season of the Survivors. So. Oh, look at you with the,
with the emojis again with the hearts. I love that. That makes me so happy.
So we start. Oh, now it's confetti. This is incredible. It's like a ticker tape
parade. So episode one, we talked very in depth about our
origin story. How you and I came to be here,
how we met, how we found each other in the world,
(03:44):
and how we realized that we had so much in
common with each other. How you and I
met was absolutely crazy. But I'm a
huge believer in fate, and we were supposed to meet and
how that pre interview for shit that goes on in our heads
lasted almost two hours. Typically those are like maybe half an
(04:07):
hour. But we just kept talking and we just had
this great synergy between the two of us, and we
built another beautiful podcast based on our
lived experiences. Yeah. And I do believe as much now, more
so now, even now that we've finished our whole first season. I believe it even
more now that there is not a community out there quite
(04:29):
like ours. There is not a platform out there quite like
ours that not only focuses on suicide
and having those conversations and talking about the really nuanced
kind of grief that's attached to that kind of loss. But it's
also a place where two different kinds of survivors like, who's out there?
Two different kinds of survivors like this, with our kind of lived experience of
(04:51):
being an attempt survivor on your side and my side being a multiple
suicide loss survivor. And I'm also on crisis lifelines and we're both advocates.
It's like we have this complete circle of
experience. Not experience we either of us wish that we had, but we
have it. And what I love more than anything about our
relationship is that you and I match each other's energy so well,
(05:13):
and we always have, since the minute we started talking to each other last
year. And we both have the singular goal
of normalizing these conversations so that people can just
talk about the shit that's weighing them down and that they're dealing with
and not feel stigmatized anymore. And I've never met anybody
that matched my energy like that before. Yeah, you are a
(05:36):
little fireball. But, you know, the other thing that we need to remember, too, is,
like, a lot of the podcasts that are out there are very clinical. Ours are
not clinical by any means. And, yes, we may laugh about
some stuff that's not really that funny, but levativity is part
of healing and acknowledging that it's okay to laugh.
You know, hindsight is 20 20. I will tell you, in my own little journ
(05:58):
journey, I can go back and laugh at some of the shit that happened right
before I made that phone call. But, you know, I got to share that in
my story, and you got to share your story, and it was so beautiful
and so eloquent when you shared your story. I'm not a big crier
lately, but, like, every time you and I get together, I cry more and more.
So it's something about you. You're just a softie. It's not me. You're just.
(06:20):
You're just a highly sensitive and emotional human that you have
a huge. A huge heart. So, you know, it doesn't surprise me that we're both
like that. And, you know, I love the fact that, you know, first.
Our first episode was obviously our origin story, which is how we got together.
And we already just shared a little bit about that. We met because of this
app that is like a dating app for podcasters and guests that got
(06:42):
us together called Pod Match. And I got invited to speak on your
podcast, and the rest is. Is kind of history at this point. We. We
just had an instant connection, and now we're sitting behind the
mic together every week doing something we love. And then we
had my story. Episode two was my story about
losing my father, my cousin, and one of my closest childhood friends to suicide
(07:04):
and learning that my father had taken his life 35 years
after he died. That was a twist that nobody
saw coming. And then we hopped over to your story, and episode
three was, you Just being so unbelievably vulnerable
and honest about how hard things were for you, and
they were. Since I started telling my story, I have had a few friends
(07:26):
drop off, because for them, for somebody to be that
vulnerable or talk about the things that I talk about,
suicide, mental health, like, it scares people, and they
dropped out of the. Out of my life. But there's a reason
and a season for friends. But I know in
my heart I'm doing the right thing, and that's all the validation I need.
(07:48):
Absolutely. And you know what? No fault to them either, because what you're
talking about and what we're talking about, like, it's hard. It's hard and it's
scary. And even though you don't maybe want it to be, it
can be off putting for a lot of people who don't know how to handle
it. So you did what you needed to do in talking about
it and being open and honest about it, and that's what saved your life. And
(08:10):
those people who may have dropped out of your life were doing what they
needed to do to protect themselves. So it's like, there's no fault, no harm, no
foul all the way around. And the point is that you're. You're
here and you're thriving, and you are the poster
Child for the 988 Crisis and Suicide
lifeline, which I love, because I think. I think we should start putting your face
(08:31):
on all the billboards around the country. Be like G. Call
988. Be like G. Oh, that was your first snort of the season.
That's so cute.
See, we started the season laughing, and we're ending the season. I
can't with you, and. No, nobody needs to see
my short little body. Short little head on a billboard.
(08:52):
No, look, I think that you. I think that you would
create a groundswell of people wanting to. To
call because you're so endearing and adorable and sweet. I think. I
think you're. I think you would. You'd fire people up
to want to help themselves. You know,
(09:13):
we moved from sharing our stories just to kind of lay the foundation for this
whole. This whole podcast. We moved right
into why these conversations matter, which I think was such a
perfect place to start, because that's what we're doing. We're having these
conversations, and they matter. And we spent
an entire episode talking about why that is.
(09:35):
And it's simple, right? We spent a half an hour talking about it, but at
the end of the day, it's really simple. When you talk about these
things, you Create safe spaces to have these
hard conversations. And you give people permission to be
vulnerable and honest and share what's going on on the
inside so that people can be better equipped to help
(09:56):
themselves and to help each other. And also, as we share our
journeys and our stories, every time we talk about it, we unlock somebody
else's pr. Sharing our journeys, sharing
our resources, sharing what's out there gives people some,
some tools, some coping tools. Because like, like
you and I both had, suicide's not like the funnest
(10:20):
topic to talk about, but it happens every day.
And that's why it's important that we talk
about it. It's important that we talk
about it not just with our friends and our family, but the world and on
LinkedIn and with businesses and with
schools and kids. It's a fact of life. It does
(10:42):
happen. And there's so many resources out there that people can
use to maybe save their life. Well, like we can't save them
all. We can at least try to give them the
resources that they need for that very moment. Yeah,
exactly. Exactly. One of the
beautiful conversations that we had that we were fortunate was a two part
(11:04):
conversation was our time that we got to spend
with Janine Ellenberg from our sponsor Calmry.
She's the chief medical officer of Calmri and
the founder of Behaviorance. What a,
what a rich and powerful conversation over that
two part that was episode six and seven. What a powerful
(11:27):
conversation with someone who has got so much clinical experience,
so much lived experience, so much professional experience,
not only as a therapist, but,
you know, kind of behind the curtain on that, that
real clinical side. And we just had such
deep conversations about how to tell when people are
(11:49):
struggling and the importance of taking care of the
people around you and the importance of prioritizing mental
health and the importance of equalizing mental illness and
recognizing it as an illness. Like, I mean, if you haven't already listened to
those two episodes, episode six and seven, go listen to them. Because
Janine offers such a rich perspective on
(12:12):
everything that we're talking about here. And she's just so incredibly eloquent
and lovely and we just wanted to hug her the entire time. That's so true.
And it's not just like her lived experiences, but she's a mom
too. And the importance of telehealth and the
importance of empathy and kindness and let's try and make the
world a better place. There's, there's a lot going on in the world right now
(12:34):
and empathy and kindness go a really long way. And just
reminding people of how important that is. Yeah, yeah, we've done
that. Well, that's been a constant theme. I mean, we've done that in, you know,
regardless of whatever it is that we've been talking about on any given week, we
always circle back to that because that's at the heart part of what we,
we need people to realize. It's how we engage with each other
(12:55):
and support each other that will change this whole narrative that
you and I are working so hard with so many other people to change. So
it's, it's just been, it's just been such
a, a full season. Just. It's gone by too fast, I think
for sure. I mean, episode eight, we debunked the
whole stigma around suicide, which is what we continue to
(13:18):
do. I mean, we definitely had an episode dedicated to it, but we,
we, we do that in every single conversation that we
have because, look, suicide has been
this scary monster in everybody's
imagination and hearts forever. It's something that nobody wants to
pay attention to and nobody wants to be affected by.
(13:41):
And we need to understand that the root of it all is just a
mental illness, which is just an illness which is something that can be treated and
something that can be positively impacted.
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(14:03):
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(14:48):
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Hopefully we've done some positive work in breaking
apart the stigma so that people don't have to feel like it's taboo
(15:10):
anymore. And you know, we've provided really good resources for people,
right, that they probably had never heard of before and can
use today. It's stuff they can print up, they can put in their phone and
you know, talking about suicide shouldn't be any different than talking
about mental health or talking about what your plans are for the
(15:31):
weekend. We all go through things and our brains are all
wired differently. And giving somebody crap
because they talked about committing suicide is probably the
shittiest thing you could ever do.
There's a lot that goes into that thought process. Think twice
before you speak and use the resources that we put out there
(15:52):
and put yourself in their shoes and kind of figure
out like, kind of what, what they were going through. Yeah, yeah, it's.
It's. It's important to. To just put judgment aside. It's important
to just validate everybody's experience for that person's experience.
Like, you know how when you're in a conversation with someone and you say something
and it really hits the person the wrong way and you're like, oh, whoa, whoa,
(16:13):
whoa, whoa, I didn't mean that. I didn't mean that. Well, okay, maybe you didn't
mean that, but it still had the impact it had on that
person because that's how they internalized it. Well, mental illness is the
same way. Depression. Depression is the same way. What might depress you might not
depress me, and vice versa. It's. All of this stuff is so
subjective. So we need to be gentle with people and we need to
(16:35):
give ourselves permission to feel the way that we feel without judging
ourselves and bitching at ourselves. And like you said,
same thing. Don't do it with other people. Just have some respect
that whatever the person is going through is something
big for them. And we just never know what's going on behind somebody
else's curtain. But, you know, like you said, we spent an awful lot of time
(16:58):
this season giving out an awful lot of what I hope, what you hope
will be resources that people will use and we'll start to
access and share. We spent four consecutive weeks,
episode 9, 10, 11, and 12. We talked about
so many different things relating to Mental Health Awareness Month. That was,
you know, how fortunate for us that our first season fell right in the middle
(17:20):
of that. Those were such great conversations too.
We talked about the importance of self care. We talked about
the crisis lines. We talked about the importance of therapy.
All really good things. But if you're not doing those
things, then you could fall into some of those
(17:40):
behaviors that you. You would talk negatively to yourself
about. Right. So, like, my big thing every day
is check under the hood, make sure that I'm good, make sure I'm
sticking with my therapy, make sure that I'm, you know,
checking in with my friends, checking with Myself stopping
the negative self talk because that is just not a good place to
(18:03):
go and sharing the virtues of therapy. Right. Like,
some people see it as a negative thing, but for me, there's so many
different types of therapy you can have, and I incorporate them
all. I do art therapy, I do eft, I do
energy therapy, I do nature therapy only when it's not
snowing. And I. It's helped my mental health. And
(18:25):
like you said, how crazy it was that we got to, you know, do our
first mental health awareness month. Yeah, yeah. And then. And then
that slid us right into Pride Month, which, again,
for. For both of us who are members of the
LGBTQ community. What a joy to be
able to talk about that on this platform because
(18:47):
we've already talked about this so many different times. We are in a
very precarious time right now in the world.
It's a challenging time to be a human on this
planet. Certainly challenging to be
in this country at the moment. Even more challenging to be part of a
marginalized community within this, this country. And
(19:10):
when you're talking about Pride Month, you want to talk about the
celebrations and the excitement and
the showering of love, but you have to also acknowledge
that there's another side of it that's really been amplified
this year during pride, which is the struggle
that has intensified for the queer community
(19:33):
and how the queer community's mental health
is being so negatively impacted by the state of the
world right now, more so even than a lot of other populations,
unfortunately. So we got to talk about that, and we got to
share a lot of our own lived experience, and we got to share a lot
of our own resources. You know, I. I spend a lot of my time on
(19:54):
the Trevor Project Crisis lifelines. I got to talk a lot about that and. And
the benefits and virtues of that. You got to talk about your own coming out
story. And we both did. And it's just so much pride. Goodness that was so
good. Makes me happy that we can talk about
this openly and once again give people really good
resources like PFLAG and free mom hugs. Like, I
(20:16):
just want to give all sorts of free mom hugs to everybody, but we
get to have these really serious conversations.
But it warms my heart that we get to do this and hopefully our
messages reach the people that need to hear them and that people
are listening and taking this seriously and, you know, making those
checklists and things that they need on a day to day basis. I really
(20:38):
hope so. You and I have been very intentional about
the kinds of things that We've shared the kinds of resources, the kinds
of topics that we've brought up on this platform. And
the whole purpose is to just elevate the whole conversation and
make it acceptable and put resources on
top of everybody's minds so that if you're struggling or if
(21:01):
someone you know is struggling, you know what to do or you have an idea
of what to do, you've got something in your back pocket that you can pull
out that can help you. Once we. We slid out of Pride
month, we. We started talking about warning signs, one of our last
episodes. In fact, last week, our. Our last episode before this
one, kind of. This whole season kind of culminated, I feel like, with
(21:24):
that conversation about warning signs that someone
you know is struggling and what to do. I mean, this is the survivors
po. This community that you and I are building is a community of people who
have in some way shape or form been touched by
suicide or mental illness, grief, loss, all
attached to that one issue of
(21:46):
suicide. And one of the biggest things in
preventing any of that from happening is understanding what the
signs are. And you and I talked about that. How do you tell when
something's off with someone? How do you reach the extroverted people
who keep all that hidden? How do you confront someone
when you know they're not okay or you suspect they're not okay? Like, what do
(22:07):
you say? What do you do? We did that last week, and I feel
so good about what we said and how we said it and the
resources that we offered. Because if. If one person from
this entire season of you and I sitting here and having these conversations, if
one single person can be helped
or the direction they were headed in can change for
(22:30):
the better because of our conversation. Well, didn't that make every minute just
worth it? It sure does. I'm. I'm
super grateful for you. I'm super grateful for your mind and
your time and your insight and being able to
do this and really make an impact out there for our
listeners. There's just so much more that we can do, like
(22:52):
repurposing our content to maybe create an ebook on some
resources and things like that so that people have something tangible to hold
up. Holding their hand. Life is short. And
knowing that you are not alone in this world and that there are
people and places that can help you move
from like that one minute to the next. That's everything.
(23:15):
And love the community that we have built. And I love the fact
that we have this amazing website that people can come out to and,
you know, you can leave us A voicemail. Send us an email. We would love
to hear from our listeners of,
like, what more would you like to hear from us? From our
perspectives? And it's. Our website is the
(23:37):
survivors.net and I can't thank my
co host enough for her amazing,
amazing mind. Well, I mean, now you're. I spent the last two
episodes before this making you cry. Now you're making me get all
emotional. We've talked a lot this season about how you and I
clicked so fast and how we started, you
(23:58):
know, saying I love you right after the first or second conversation that we
had, which was so unusual and felt so normal. And
we talk, what, 65 times a day, probably. We talk or we
text. Feels like that. Yes. Yeah. I feel like I talk to you on the
telephone more than I talk to even my own mother. And that says a lot.
And it's like you have truly become family to
(24:20):
me. I mean, I said it earlier, you match each other's energy
in so many ways. And I'm so grateful for your
willingness to have these conversations and your energy around
it and just. You have one of the biggest, most
beautiful hearts that I have ever, ever come
across in a human. And my life is so much
(24:42):
richer because you're a part of it now. See,
I see you. I see it. There it is. I made you cry. It's okay.
You're okay. You're okay. But suffice it all to say that
this has been a dream come true for me, and it's. It's been a gift.
Now I'm fully crying. If you're watching this YouTube video now, I'm, like, full
on crying. You are a gift. And so is this. This podcast the
(25:05):
same. And thank you to our listeners who stuck with us for
15 episodes. I can't wait for season two. We have so
many other things that we're going to talk about, and we're going to really dig
deep. And if there's a subject you want us to touch on
from both of our perspectives, please go to the website, leave us
a voicemail or email. We want to hear from you.
(25:27):
And just please, everybody remember, you are enough. You are
wanted, you are loved. And the world's a better place because you're here.
Yeah, I second all of that. And I. I'll. I'll
leave you with this one last message. We've worked really,
really hard, you and I, this, this season, to build
something special, to build a community where people who are
(25:50):
dealing with suicide. Look, There are over 92 million
people in this world every year who are somehow
touched by suicide. And we are trying to create a community
where those people can come together and get the support, support
and the resources and the guidance and the sense of
community that you need in whatever way you need
(26:12):
it. So this whole experience this season has been a gift. I
cannot wait to come back for season two and do it all over
again and have even more impactful conversations than the
ones we've already had. Thanks for being here. Everybody listening.
Supporting G. I just love you. I love you so much. I love you
more. And I have one little thing for you. Let me go get it. Here
(26:35):
we go. I got some heart. I heart you. You
heart me. So if you're. If you're just listening to this in the last couple
of episodes, she has found her emojis button on our
riverside recording studio and now is is doing confetti
and hearts for everything. So she just gave me lots of hearts. So
we will end today and we will end this season with
(26:56):
all the hearts and all the love and we will come back re
energized for season two. We'll see you soon. See you soon.
Thanks for joining us on the survivors. Remember, no matter how tough things
feel, you are enough and the world needs you just the way you are.
You're not alone in this journey. There's a community here and every step forward
counts. We're so grateful you took the time to listen and we hope you'll
(27:19):
take one day at a time. Just know there's always more light ahead.
Thanks for being here. Friends, just remember, help is out there in
so many different places. So if you or someone you know is struggling,
please call 988 and a trained crisis counselor like me will be
there to help. You can also find an inclusive and comprehensive directory of
(27:39):
mental health resources, tools and content@thehelphub
co. Just remember that help is always just a call or a
click away. We'll catch you next week. In the meantime, keep surviving.
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