September 19, 2024 • 53 mins
Welcome to another episode of "The Two Charlottes Spill the Tea." In this episode, the Charlottes dive into the increasingly prevalent issue of rudeness and lack of respect in modern society. They explore how social media and recent societal changes might be contributing to this trend and discuss the importance of maintaining good manners and empathy.
The conversation also touches on the impact of social media, the rise of toxic positivity, and the challenges of raising respectful children in today's world. They reflect on their personal experiences and share insights on how to navigate and combat this growing issue.
Join the discussion and share your thoughts on this eye-opening topic. Don't forget to subscribe, like, and follow us on social media for more engaging conversations.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:01):
Hello and welcome to another episode of the
two charlottes spill the tea and today
we're going to talk about something that i am hoping a lot of you find just
as frustrating as we do and we're just we're going to talk about like when did
it become okay for people to just be.
(00:24):
Flat out rude because that's their
opinion like when when was it oh like when
did we stop you know showing respect
for other people's opinions being open-minded and
understanding that other people can see and
think and feel things differently to the way we did or
the way we do without feeling the need to be
(00:46):
like you're wrong you know when when did
we get to this point where just because that's your
opinion means you're allowed to be rude
to people and have this sense of
entitlement that you can just you
know act a certain way because well I'm
allowed to do what I want and be how I want and say what I want
(01:08):
and you have to just be okay with it you know what
happened to this whole you know be if
you haven't got anything nice to say don't say anything thing
that we were all brought up with you know I
know I was when I was a kid that was something that my mom
and used every used to say to me all the time so yeah when did it change like
what what changed yeah like kids these days I mean I don't know like we I was
(01:35):
brought up the same way you don't have anything nice to say and don't say anything
at all and like when I was a kid growing.
Up it was drilled into us to like
have respect for your elders to have good manners like
we did never like we never got anything because we didn't
remember please thank you and to ask nicely and
to be polite and you know just to mind always mind your manners mind your manners
(02:00):
I got told that so many times growing up mind your manners this it's just it's
second nature to me that you would have good manners be respectful you know like.
Even probably sounds really petty but even to the extent of like the kids that
play outside on the streets and stuff like that now like there's kids out here that,
(02:25):
I don't know, they're not that old anyway. They're not probably maybe early
teens, like 13 most, and then down to about six or maybe younger.
But they're outside at night. They're outside now, and it's dark.
I don't even know what time it is. Nine o'clock.
And you can hear them shouting, screaming, swearing.
(02:46):
And I mean, like, swearing a lot. And when I was a kid, if I'd been out of the street at that age.
Swearing and shouting and screaming like they did I
wouldn't have been allowed out yeah my parents wouldn't make me
come back in the house I mean for a start I wouldn't have been allowed out
at this time of night anyway no it's eight o'clock
(03:07):
because it's dark eight o'clock but also if
I'd been out shouting and screaming like like they
do now I would have been called in and I
would have been told you're not going outside when you behave like that like you
don't behave like that outside and it's just
I would have been brought up to be like you know be
respectful when it's late at night there's like kids asleep
(03:27):
there's young children asleep there's old people that
are asleep or trying to relax in their houses you don't
be running up and down the streets shouting and screaming and it's just even
down to things like that I just find
that there's a way that we were
brought up in in my day sounds like
I'm really old yeah sounds like a right
(03:48):
old like I'm just
saying like that's what they're doing now I wouldn't let
personally wouldn't let my own kids do that because I
think it's it's just a little bit disrespectful and rude to be acting like that
where you know when there's when it's late at night and and you're on the streets
but I think a lot of things I see these days are disrespectful and rude and
(04:10):
I wouldn't want myself or my kids to act that way yeah and it's yeah like I
think you're right like Like, when did it...
When did we get so...
Kind of lack of respect for other people that are living around where we live
it's just it seems a little bit crazy to me because yeah like you say like we
(04:30):
weren't brought up like that at all like we were brought up to have manners
but there seems to have been like a generation.
Somewhere that maybe or not I don't want to generalize and
say a whole generation but it just seems like there's less
emphasis on like kids having
manners these days or you know and
maybe not being so rude and I think like you're saying as
(04:53):
well you know you see it a lot because we've
both got kids that kind of age like teenage kids you
see it a lot in in the
behaviors and you know mannerisms and stuff like that and it's really important
I think to install morals and ethics and manners into kids like we were always
told it doesn't manners don't cost a thing it It doesn't cost you anything to
(05:17):
have good manners and it take you really far.
I can remember being told over and over again by my dad, you can be flat on
your ass, he used to say to me. You could be flat on your ass with nothing.
Right. But if you've always had good manners and been respectful and had kindness
and empathy for other people, you'll never struggle because people will always want to help you.
(05:39):
If you're polite and well-mannered and you have good morals and ethics and,
you know, treat people nicely.
If you're ever in a bad situation someone will
want to help you but if you're rude and don't
have manners and you're ignorant to people then no
one will help you if you ever get in a jam like no one's going
to want to help you because they just think you're an arsehole and you deserve
(06:00):
it yeah and like I got told
that a lot when I was growing up so it was always drilled into
me to like have good manners be polite have morals and
ethics and I was always told
to even if you don't agree with what someone
does or says or thinks if that's their opinion you
know let them have it and be polite and
(06:22):
listen I always got told listen to other people's stories and
opinions and things and see what you can learn from it
yeah I feel like we've lost that a
little bit I think so and I do think like
I think you know we were saying obviously just before we came
on today we were saying that maybe it's because now we're
kind of getting to that teenage years with our our kids that we're a bit
(06:42):
more exposed to it because none of my friends are like that like
we are not like the people that I'm
friends with and my family members we're not deliberately rude to each other
you know there's constructive criticism of course but we're not deliberately
rude but the stuff that the way that I've heard you know some of Grace's friends
(07:04):
talk to each other I'm just like.
Wow that's just blatant rudeness and
I'm just like that's just like rudeness and just
mean girl mentality and I really don't rate that
like you were always yeah brought
up manners you know respect your elders respect other
people other people's opinions you know cultures
(07:27):
religion views you know morals whatever
it is if it's somebody else's and they feel really strongly about
it that's absolutely okay you don't
have to agree but you are allowed to
agree to disagree and it doesn't need to be
this massive thing and you
know like it doesn't need to be this whole oh
(07:49):
well you don't believe in this so you're wrong you know
or you don't feel the same way I do about
this so you're wrong like but when did that become an
okay thing to do like when is it okay for somebody
to you know say oh well
what you're doing is wrong when I'm like well how do you know like that's how
I feel that's my opinion judging people on like yeah judging people on looks
(08:15):
and things like that like I know with my daughter I had orphan issues because I had dreadlock and.
And my God, like some of the girls in her school started like saying that,
oh, your mom's a druggie.
Look at her hair. Your mom definitely smokes weed. She's a druggie,
(08:36):
blah, blah, blah. Right.
And I ended up going into the school about it. And I said to them,
you need to do something about this.
Like she's getting bullied because of the way I look.
Yeah. And they were like, yes, I know. Well, you do look different,
but I know it's not really right. and I got really cross with them and I was like, you have to teach,
you have to teach kids to be more accepting that you have to do something because
(08:58):
basically it's slander what they're saying as well like it's not true like I
don't yet I don't even smoke.
And they're saying that I am a druggie and
I smoke weed and I was like that sort of stuff is damaging to
my reputation yeah slanderous and
it's all because I've got dreadlocks you know and besides
(09:18):
which like my daughter shouldn't suffer for how I choose to
dress or and just my hair your style
doesn't meet because like because
I have noticed and I've been joking about it like since
I put my dreads in so I've had
like you know how when you walk around town when you
have people like oh you know do you want to sign up
(09:38):
to this charity or donate so have a
leaflet for this or can we switch your energy bills when
I have my dreads in no one talks to me like people
use everyone used to stop me when I walk around
town I obviously have a face that means you can't say no because
90% of the time if you ask me to donate to
kids with cancer I'm going to give you all the money because I can't
(10:00):
say no yeah ever since I've had my dreads in
people just don't they don't make eye contact like
you don't have people are
giving you flyers that doesn't happen offering like
you you know to sign up to charities no not had a
single person and the only people like
I have had quite a few people don't get me wrong tell me that they
(10:22):
really like my hair but they are people that
are also dressed in a really alternative way like there was a woman by Mark
she had like everything on your face you could get pierced she had pierced like.
It looked really cool like her style was really cool and she was like yeah your.
Hair looks awesome but yeah also like the people that kind of have this alternative style.
(10:44):
But yeah, I have people looking at me really weirdly,
since putting dreadlocks in and I'm like why don't you
want to ask me if I want to donate do you think I'm poor or
something just because I've got dreadlocks and like yeah like
come on like it's it's crazy but
that's all it's funny isn't it how people judge yeah yeah
(11:05):
yeah like I I had when I had my dreadlocks in I had people actually cross over
the street so they didn't have to walk past me and I used to think do you know
what I'm probably I I I have no qualms about who I am as a person like I know
I'm probably one of the nicest people that you could ever.
Hope to meet and that I'm a genuine person so
(11:26):
and I used to think you just you're literally just taking one
look at my hair and deciding that you don't or you
know maybe the way I dress as well and deciding I'm a
horrible person but I'm probably one of the nicest
people you could meet and it's it's very judgmental and
what I find what I've
found as I've got older is that usually those kind of
(11:47):
people that are doing the judging are probably the kind
of people that need to take a long hard look in in the
mirror at themselves and see you know
it like that kind of thing is definitely a reflection on
them and they need to see what parts of
themselves they still need to work on to be a better
person because having a judgment like that like a
(12:10):
decent well-rounded happy individual doesn't judge
people based on what they look like no when
I was younger I used to it used to upset me
a little bit because I used to think like I am a really nice person like
why would you judge me like that you don't even know me but then you know I'm
also now a little bit older where I think you I don't even think about it but
(12:30):
if I was gonna think about it I'd be like your opinion means nothing to me because
I don't even know you anyway so well yeah exactly like Like,
because I used to get really,
really hung up on other people's opinions.
And I went through a phase where I had quite a few facial piercings and I'd
get really strange looks from like older people in shops.
(12:53):
And, you know, whenever I got a tattoo, like somebody, you know,
older would always make comments of, oh, well, you know, it's not going to look
nice when you're old, blah, blah, blah. Like, why are you that?
You know, all those kind of things. but I used to,
So obviously, you know, both of us, we had our first children when we were quite young.
(13:14):
So when I went to anything to do with Grace's school, all of the mums are a
good 10 to 15 years older than me.
So there was always that there was always like a handful of the parents that would be like, oh, OK.
And you could see the judgy eyes.
(13:34):
Do you know what I mean? Like I didn't even have my dreads in at this point
when I was going to these things.
But I do have tattoos I did have my nose
ring in and I'm like that you back when
we like back then as well when it's probably not
the same these days because you know it's more and
I think it depends where you live as well like over here for sure
(13:55):
it's more normal for kids for people to have kids younger
yeah but over in England you know
back in well 2000 is the
year I had my so you're talking the end of the 90s early 2000s
it was really kind of frowned upon
like I know that I was I think I was the only girl in my year at school that
(14:16):
got pregnant at 16 I think maybe one other girl yeah it was like you know shock
horror I can't believe that happened to someone so then at the school I used
to really feel it especially when I first started taking Maya to
play school I was my first experience of
that kind of thing and I felt like you know
I had dreadlocks I was alternative with my fashion
(14:39):
rainbow colors you know like yeah denim mini skirts over leggings and biker
boots and like rainbow tops and big dreadlocks and I'd walk down to take her
there and I felt like the other mums would literally be in like tweed suits
like tweed skirts and jackets and blouses and heels, you know. Yeah.
With their like, yeah, short plumbed, tidy hair and stuff. And I'd be like,
(15:05):
I just feel like they'd all be there. It felt like I was walking into a chicken
coop and they'd all be like clucking away together.
And then I'd be there like completely different and I felt really alone and kind of segregated.
But it took, it did take a big thing for them to all suddenly like be friendly with me and be nice to me.
(15:28):
But it was, that's probably a story for another day, but it was a bad situation
that happened and all of the mums that were down at the playgroup suddenly just
came and stood by my side and put their arms around me and stood up for me.
And that was quite a moment, I'm not going to lie.
It was quite a moment where it was like something bad happened to me with another
(15:53):
person coming down and causing a scene, which was not my fault.
It was just another person causing a scene, basically.
And it made everyone come and stick up
for me and I just suddenly felt like maybe I wasn't as alone as
what I thought I was or maybe because of what the
other person was like they realized that actually she's not
a bad girl yeah that's it I
(16:15):
don't really know but yeah that was that was quite mad
but I still felt it like when Maya went to school and stuff
like that I still definitely felt very judged for
how I looked yeah and even
if people don't make comments sometimes it's just facial
expressions isn't it some people's faces give it away and
yeah because I'm one of these people right so I everyone
(16:38):
jokes that I can't lie like I
can't tell lie well I can they can come out
of my mouth but my face will tell you so I just
choose not to because it's safer I get caught anyway
but I think some people yeah sometimes it's
just their their facial expressions and that's probably
something that's always been a thing like especially
(17:01):
with how people look and if you go like you
have the class systems and you know like if you go into
certain parts of different countries obviously there
is that kind of thing but what's happening now I think is open open criticism
is happening like people are just openly being like I hate your hair and it's
(17:24):
okay and I'm not allowed to say anything about it because that's their opinion.
Yeah I have you know what saying that you
saying that now made me think of something that I didn't think about
before when we were talking about this I actually think
that is to do with the rise of social media because people
are so used to hiding behind
(17:46):
their keyboards and saying stuff and being a
certain way and getting away with it like the online bullying the
trolling how rude some people are online
that it's bleeding into real life
yeah and like i'm not saying it's
okay online i absolutely detest that kind of behavior
it's not okay and it's not okay to do
(18:07):
that or be like that at all but like there's
definitely social media definitely has caused
a lot of problems in human interaction and i don't just
think it's social media i think covid coupled like
the isolation coupled with the use
of social media has a lot to answer for when it
comes to changing trends of how people behave
(18:30):
and what people have grown up with and what they used
to and you know when we grew up we didn't really have internet I mean we did
but it was really only few people that had it it was dial up it wasn't social
media it was very different so our way of of being social was by interacting
with each other and growing up in social communities.
(18:52):
If you think about it back then as well, it was totally the norm for your parents
to take you into a pub on a Saturday or a Sunday and spend hours in the pubs
while they were with their friends.
You'd be there with a bunch of other kids as well.
Everyone would be hanging out together and it was very social.
So people were accustomed to...
(19:13):
Being mindful of each other being but being kind to each other
I'll get you a drink I'll get you a drink what do the kids want you
know it was there was it was just a different time or
you know you'd be down like there was always a village fate
or yeah something and somewhere
to go to and times was a lot more social so
we were very aware of you know making sure that
(19:34):
people were included and not letting anyone be left out
and you know oh I can remember my parents
saying to me I'll make sure that you look after so-and-so you know
make sure so-and-so is okay so you'd you'd invite your friends to wherever or
wherever people are going like I remember even on bonfire night where the village
I grew up in we all went up to the park and there was a massive bonfire there
(19:56):
and a firework display and like the whole village would be up there and everyone would see everyone.
You know just always something social but
since the rise of social media
and then also so the what was it
two years in isolation and in lockdown because of
covid and you know there's just this like
(20:17):
people don't really go out anymore and socialize not to
the extent that they used to the like not as like pubs aren't as busy pubs aren't
as busy the sunday go out for a meal at the weekend with your family that doesn't
really happen these days like i remember every pub you drive past would have
a beer garden with like swings or a slide or something yeah some kind
(20:38):
of climbing frame yeah do you remember like do you remember going to
the pub at the weekend and they'd be like oh yeah the climbing frame now we
go to that pub because you don't have that anymore like most of those pubs that
you drive from one town to another and you see those big pubs they're shut down
at the side of the roads and there's no one going in them so people aren't really
as social and then obviously that on social media where it there's kind of this trend almost.
(21:02):
Where people think it's acceptable to just go on
to someone's post that they don't even know and be rude and oh
you look like you look you look fat in that what you're too fat to wear something
like you're too skinny to wear something like that oh your makeup is a joke
why why would you be so nasty to someone you don't know but that kind of behavior
I think is bleeding through into daytime yeah and it's like what I was saying
(21:25):
to you when we were talking about this earlier like,
people are given a choice that
there's an a subconscious choice that you
make every day to be a nice person or to not be a nice
person and when given the chance
to do right a lot of people don't
like yeah and it's like what I said to
(21:47):
you it's the things people do when they don't think people are
really paying attention or watching like not saying thank you when you stop
to let someone cross the road when you're in a car or not holding a door open
for someone and letting it slam in their face or giving an ignorant rude comment
to someone about the way they look or you smile at someone as you're walking
down the street and they go what's your fucking problem you know like.
(22:10):
Do you have people that can do the right thing when they think no one's watching
and hold that door open or say thank you to someone or be polite and be mannered?
Those people have a good moral standing, good ethics.
They're good people in their soul because they're doing stuff naturally.
They're doing the right thing naturally, right?
(22:31):
That subconscious choice is going on constantly to mind your manners,
have kindness, have empathy.
Thing they need it the people that you know aren't doing
that and their subconscious choice is telling them don't do
that don't need to say thanks don't be polite to that person don't smile back
be rude give a rude comment oh that person looks like shit tell them that's
(22:52):
like something very fundamentally wrong with somebody to have made that subconscious
decision to not be a nice person yeah like Like,
that's not a good trait that we want people to start developing.
If you have people all over the world making that small subconscious decision
to not be a nice person, when that multiplies, where does that leave us in 10 years time?
(23:18):
And the worrying thing is, the reason they do it is because they feel like they
can because it's their opinion.
Opinion so i'm allowed to you
know make that comment or i'm allowed
to not say thank you because why should i i
don't want to so i'm not gonna i don't owe them anything yeah i don't know them
(23:40):
why have i got like why should i say thank you why should i hold the door for
that woman with a buggy it's not my kid like yeah they'd people have got this well it's not my issue so
therefore I don't need to, it doesn't involve me, so why should I care kind of mentality.
(24:01):
And I think you're onto something with it being the rise of social media,
because I do think people are more vocally mean because they have the ability
to do it from the comfort of their own home.
And the people that probably wouldn't say anything to anyone's face will quite
(24:21):
happily say something behind an anonymous account on you know Facebook Instagram TikTok whatever.
And it is you know becoming a
thing and potentially you know like obviously I don't
want to speak for everybody but potentially like if you're a
parent that behaves that way your child is
(24:42):
seeing you behave that way so they then behave that way they behave that way
with with their friends they then grow up and have kids and they do the same
thing and the cycle repeats itself and get those you know it's it's quite scary when you think like.
Actually if this is something that is just going to become more
(25:04):
and more then it's like we're
going to end up with like no nice people it's it's just going to be me and
you that's it we'll just be you left with our
little nice flag and that's what you're saying
like about the kids watching you and what i said
about like those little actions that are so subconscious you
don't notice them through the day where you have those
(25:25):
chances every day we all have 100 million
chances probably to do the right thing to be
a good person like waiting to
let someone cross the road if it's raining or thanking that
person that's let you cross the road or you know
holding the door open for someone or letting someone skip in.
Front of you in a queue if they've only got a couple of things or you
(25:47):
know all these like small little things that you
do or remembering even when
if you're at home with your kid and they're you know
doing things and you remember to say please and thank you to
your husband or to your older kid or like even to
your child instead of it's just pass me that can
you please pass me that yeah those tiny
(26:08):
little things that that child grows
up watching like they watch everything your
mannerisms that's where they learn so you think you you turn around and go I
don't know why my child's got no manners well it's because they've been watching
you for the past 10 years and you don't have any and you've never spoken to
them with manners so you know what did you think was gonna happen like what did you expect.
(26:34):
It's just like you said like if that snowballs and
that's what they watch then you know they'll be the same way and yeah it's a
scary scary thought and I do think that living in isolation as well like for
that generation that was like or those few generations that were not at school,
(26:57):
not learning those social skills for those two years.
And you know going through that being trapped
in isolation they've only dealt with their own opinions
and their own minds so maybe as
well that's a little bit where no you're wrong actually because I don't think
that this is exactly what I think like they're so used to pleasing themselves
(27:18):
from maybe I mean I'm just I'm just throwing mud yeah just throwing ideas out
but I think no I I think it could be, it could be that.
And it could also be, you know, very much this whole, I don't know,
it's, it's really hard to say it without potentially just offending half of the population.
(27:38):
But it's this thing of, you know, be who you are, be true to yourself.
Don't, you know, fit yourself into anybody else's box.
Don't, you know, pretend to be anything that you're not, blah
blah blah but why do we
have to do that and be horrible at the same time like why
(28:00):
is why is being true to yourself being an
arsehole like and I don't know if that comes from
this whole like again online like
generation and trend of this whole
like female empowerment and be who you want
to be and don't take any you know shit from anybody and blah blah blah which
I'm all for by the way like I'm all for like you know step into your own power
(28:26):
and take control of your own life and all of that kind of stuff 100% but do you have to do that and.
Be an asshole is my question there's definitely
a thing that people need to learn that
it is okay to have very strong opinions and definitions of who you are and be
(28:47):
open to other people having the same very strong opinions and definitions of
who they are which are different to yours and you can still be the best of friends
with that person and have a great relationship because you have
understanding that we live in a very
multicultural diverse i mean
(29:08):
what are we how many genders i
don't i'm lost count so there's a lot
out there right and it's very diverse and
instead of all being adamant that we're right we can
just accept that we're right for us for our
views for my views and for who i
am what i think is right my right is not
(29:28):
the same as you're right and it's not the same as you
know bob down the streets right or anything like that but
we can all be right in our own little bubbles and still share a communal space
together with love and understanding that you know each person is right for
them exactly and i think you know like you know i've had plenty of experiences
(29:50):
over the years with people just saying oh no you.
You can't believe that that's that's not
right blah blah blah and like I'm sure you get it as well like
especially kind of being more of a spiritual person you do
get a lot of people that you know don't
understand it like there was a guy I used to work with who when he found out
(30:11):
my mother-in-law read tarot was genuinely scared of me yeah like because he
was very very religious contagious and that's cool. That's your thing. But.
In his head tarot was the devil's work and you
know and I'm like I'm trying to explain that
(30:31):
I'm like it's just a different belief system like you know
and again I'm probably going to offend loads of people but part
of me sits there and thinks Christianity is just a really nice story like
but that's my opinion like I don't need you to try and prove me wrong I don't
need to try and convince you that you know meditating and connecting to spirit
(30:52):
is more of a you know more of a faith or less of a faith than something else
like what I don't need you to convince me but,
I'm not wrong and neither are you you know exactly
in our own way I think that when you're
like if you believe in Jesus or if you believe in God
or if you believe in Shiva or
(31:12):
Shakti or Buddha or a spiritual way
of life you pray to a
higher power or give a ritual to a higher power or meditate to a higher point
of view and a higher dimension or way of being right it doesn't really matter
(31:32):
what you believe or what you do everyone that does those things with pure intentions and
love in their heart is doing it for the same reason yeah and that's what matters because.
As long as your intentions are pure and you do something like that with love
in your heart it doesn't matter what religion you are or what spiritual belief
you are your end goal is the very same and that's what's magical about that
(31:58):
if there is a god or if there is if it is shiva or or Shakti, or Allah,
or whoever it is, they don't care what medium you use, what medium works for you.
If I was a God, I would make sure there was a lot of different mediums that people could pray to me.
So there was something to suit every type of person that there was.
(32:19):
And as long as those people have pure hearts and good intentions,
it all means the same thing, really.
And there's no point telling someone they're wrong because their belief system
works for them when you're doing the same thing you're you're fundamentally
your ideals are the same if you,
(32:40):
are a good christian with good morals and good
ethics you're just the same as someone who's a good spiritualist with good morals
and good ethics you want the best for people you want to help people that are
in need of help you you know want to love your neighbor and etc etc so it's
only i I think when you're in something with bad intentions and nefarious purposes,
(33:00):
that that can then be twisted for an evil,
like, and no one can see this on the podcast, but I'm quotation marking.
Like an evil thing.
Like you can't say, like I've heard people, you know, the whole Christians and
pagan argument that, oh, it's devil worshipping.
No, it's only doing something bad if you're doing it for nefarious reasons,
(33:23):
because if someone comes into anything think with the same
intention it doesn't matter really does it what they
believe in no I think at the end of the day faith is faith whether you believe
in you know a specific faith or your own or if you just believe in yourself
and your own power and your own ability you know,
(33:48):
I don't, I don't think it should make a difference, but it does.
And it's now a really vocal thing that people think it's absolutely okay to
just say this stuff to people.
And I'm like, hang on, like what, you know, what happened to respecting other
people's opinions and allowing other people to have an opinion.
(34:10):
And it's like this kind of vicious circle of I'm allowed to say this because
it's my opinion and you have to be okay about it.
And And it's, you know, but I'm like, but no, like your opinion, I understand.
I respect it. I don't believe it. We'll agree to disagree.
You know what I think is a part of it is because videos like that,
(34:34):
like if you're on TikTok or Instagram or Facebook Reels, YouTube Shorts,
videos like that get a lot of likes, get a lot of clicks.
When you do a rude video
slagging someone off or having a pop at
something they go viral very quickly and
I think that might be a part of it I mean again I'm
(34:54):
throwing mud and seeing what sticks but no I
do not have a slight kind of frame
where people do it for the clicks and the likes yeah and
we are of you know a lot of things do revolve around
social media like you know we use social
media we you know we post stuff about our lives
on it we promote this podcast on it I do think there's a lot of
(35:16):
good things that can come out of social media you know I've got family that
live in other countries so having social media is a unified way of being able
to share what's going on in our lives when we're not together so I do think
that there's some really good things in it but I do think you're right in the
sense that actually like.
Those videos yeah having a pop at someone
(35:38):
or slagging somebody off because people want the tea they're like oh I want
to know what's going on with that person like and don't get me wrong I will
hold my hands up sometimes when I see someone arguing on Facebook I will sit
there and read every moment and I get invested and I pick a side but I don't voice my opinion to that.
Person I think and yeah and
(36:03):
while we're just on that topic actually talking about posts
and things on social media one thing that
I think is also becoming a bit of a I don't
want to say epidemic but you know a thing that's
spreading everywhere is toxic positivity so where
you know you have to be so incredibly
positive with everything and anything and you're
(36:25):
not allowed to kind of be sad about
stuff in the social media space
because you have to you know
constantly posting happy positive
uplifting stuff and then the people
that do get vulnerable and post stuff end up getting
trolled like nobody's business because how dare
(36:46):
they post that stuff on social
media and you know but also
this whole culture of oh we just have to be happy all the time there's always
somebody worse off than you are so yeah this is really bad for you but you know
it just be happy about it anyway be grateful that you know you've still got
(37:08):
this even though you've lost this you know.
Yeah yeah no I totally agree with you and and the
same then if you are vulnerable and you open up getting trolled
like you remember the whole
Caroline Slack thing you know and what happened
to her was awful and it sparked off this huge thing
of oh be kind online but people
(37:32):
say it and they aren't kind like people
aren't kind I have seen some horrific online
bullying as have you from people opening up
and being vulnerable and you have people and fair
play to like some of the people that we've seen
doing it and these are strong women mentally
strong women who have opened up about
(37:54):
incredibly heartbreaking and vulnerable topics
that they've gone through and then been on the
receiving end of some absolutely disgusting and vicious
malicious trolling so when someone does
then open up and talk about something
that could you know could push someone over the edge you know to committing
(38:17):
suicide or to doing something horrible to themselves and they're bullied like
when they do open up about a vulnerable situation and they're bullied online
like that again by these people who think it's okay to sit behind
their keyboard and talk horribly to someone because it's online and it's not face-to-face.
So they're lacking that bit of humanity in them.
(38:39):
And then, so then, yeah, you read this, this culture of people and I say people,
but really I'm looking at younger generations that are coming through,
trying to find their way in this online world, which is huge.
Like the online world, online social media has really exploded.
So you have these people, I mean, you know what it was like for us as teenagers
(39:01):
trying to make our way in the world and trying to find our identity.
So now you've got these kids doing that online where
there's adults and assholes and all sorts
of weirdos around them as well you know it's not just
their friends down in the playground yeah and they're
seeing this whole kind of this whole thing and
you know what kids are like it's monkey see monkey do so they
(39:23):
see this whole thing of people showing off what
I call and it's not just Instagram it's all social media but
what I call Instagram worthy pictures where they're set
up somewhere and their house looks like a show home and their
makeup's immaculate and everything's perfect and their life is
just perfect and they're showing you the highlight reels of
them at Costa or having a coffee somewhere or here doing
(39:43):
this and you think everything's perfect everything's perfect.
For everyone so we all have to act like everything is perfect
we have to keep up with the Jones only now the Jones are
our social media friends not our actual neighbors so
you have to keep up with them and you know you're competing
to be this like super perfect person in this super
perfect world and everything is super perfect and super fine but
(40:05):
yet obviously it isn't because real life
just is not like that and we know that because we are adults that
are well aware of that and we've been through it and yet even
in certain communities and I'm not gonna
name any names and and get bashed for it but
you know there are it was
a big thing in in online sales before for people started becoming aware of being
(40:29):
real more real and connecting with like-minded people where people would portray
this image of having loads of money and designer this and expensive days out and yeah.
You know it was the whole oh no one wants to hear what you're
going through no one wants to see you know the bad stuff
and you make sure your house is spotless and you
(40:50):
know blah blah blah where it's not real like people
who have like single mums with kids don't have spotless
houses I'm sorry do you have kids and your house is spotless you
have a problem there's something wrong there's something
wrong with your kids and you need to take them to get them checked out because
if you have pets and kids then there's
(41:11):
no hope for you your house is going to be a mess for the next 20
years i'm sorry but it's just how it is like
there will always be fur and toys everywhere
and clothes as they get older the toys
disappear and it turns to clothes and like
lunch boxes and school bags and
other bags and just do it everywhere so you
(41:33):
can't have a picture perfect house sometimes bills come
in and your skin and shit happens and life
gets tough and you should be allowed to be real in
your space without getting trolled for
it or getting bullied for it or having people go why is she posting all of her
you know oh look at so-and-so over there telling everyone about that what's
(41:53):
going on like who she thinks she is or or whatever other people do and say and
this this whole vibe of like oh my life's falling apart but I'm fine I'm fine
No, honestly, guys, everything is sunshine.
Thank God I lived to see another day. You know, that is toxic positivity.
If you feel that you can't say, look, I'm sorry, I'm having a shit day.
I'm not going to be on social media for a while. I don't need sympathy.
(42:16):
I don't need a hundred messages saying, you're right, babe. No,
I'm just having a shit day. So just leave me alone. Yeah.
It's fine. Okay, we'll leave you alone for today. We'll talk to you tomorrow.
Yeah. Yeah. It's that, like, I don't need to. It's so fake.
I don't know if you've seen that episode of Friends where,
(42:40):
It's like later into the seasons where Ross is with Charlie and Joey's now dating
Rachel and he makes fajitas.
And the whole time he's like, I'm fine. I'm fine. I'm fine.
I'm fine. I'm fine.
And he's not fine. And he gets absolutely legless drunk and burns his hands on the fajita pan.
(43:02):
Because that is what social media is like when your world's falling apart.
Like I'm fine I'm fine and you're not fine like
oh my god and it's so good like
it's okay to not be
okay and I know that's really like
that's such a cheesy line and actually to be honest I'm not a massive
(43:23):
fan of it because it's a bit like but it
is actually okay like but what's not
okay is to and I feel
like this might end up being another episode but it's not okay to
unpack and live in the chaos all the time it's okay
to be it's okay to be sad it's okay to be run down and tired and depressed and
(43:45):
stressed and struggling but it's not okay to sit in that for like weeks and
months and years on end and that is an excuse yeah that's a whole different kettle of fish like.
It's also not okay to belittle and
abuse and be rude to somebody who is having bad times like we talk about oh
(44:09):
it's okay to not be okay and yeah there are a lot of us like me and you that
will be happy to sit with someone and you know help them out of that kind of place but there
are likewise a lot of people who treat that and will share posts and share stuff
on social media saying it's okay, my inbox is always open.
(44:31):
Yeah, when they'll give them the actual chance to do some real good and help
someone, I can guarantee you that they will not.
And they will go and you know they can bully other people and I see it in younger generations,
doing it a lot and the ignorance and the rudeness and just again you know I
see a lot of because obviously I watch a lot of like fitness and weight loss
(44:54):
stuff and I see a lot of reels of girls trying to lose weight and other girls
just commenting on there like why bother you're fat and ugly.
Yeah you know oh you say you've lost
weight but you're still fat you know like what is
your problem that you would say something like that to someone who's trying
to improve themselves or trying to do something for themselves like how could
(45:17):
you be so rude and so then that kind of comment is there's just it's just cruel
and that's like I think that you know that's literally the.
Thing is like why is that okay why like and
like i said right at the beginning of the episode when did it
become okay to just be rude to people because
(45:37):
it's your view or your opinion
yeah like what like when did this
become a thing like when i think like with the
whole rise of social media like we
need to do more to prepare
protect and help our children in that
world yeah because they're the ones that
(45:59):
are growing up in that world and it's so unmonitored you know
and like we didn't have it when we we I didn't
have social media till I was like 19 probably 1920
yeah to be fair i got facebook just
after grace was born so yeah i was 19
when i actually got facebook when i moved here yeah so that was in 2008 so i
(46:23):
was in my 20s i did have social media it was msn oh yeah i had i had msn i'd
msn self and i did have a bebo account.
And I got very upset if I didn't get
love hearts every day from people I won't lie completely
revolved around myself but you know
like we weren't exposed to it in the
(46:46):
same sense that we are now like it's such a huge part of our everyone's life
now even if you try and stay off social media there'll always be something that
will make you and that people talk about it on the telly you know you say oh
they do it for the likes everyone knows what you mean yeah.
Everyone knows what you're like when we were kids if someone
(47:08):
said oh you're doing it for the likes no one would have had a clue what you
everyone had been like what what what are you talking about but now when you
say something like that everyone knows what it means yeah and yeah like that
needs to be we we need to step in i think and do something to help our children learn that
(47:30):
empathy,
understanding, kindness and compassion has to bleed through to social media as well.
Yeah. It shouldn't just be something you do to your family and your close friends.
It should be something that you let go into your whole entire life.
Yeah. Always treating people with the kindness and compassion that,
(47:54):
you know, you would want to be treated with
yeah and you know that's something
i do think as parents is our responsibility
yeah who you know feed
into our children and i do it with grace quite
a lot you know she went through a phase of being bullied and
i understood how she felt and we you know we
(48:16):
work through that but there was also a conversation
of you know we don't know what's going
on in that person's personal life but
it doesn't excuse being just a dick yeah really that is a nice way to put it
sorry yeah yeah definitely like it is something that really needs to be looked into because.
(48:44):
It's gone crazy in our generation and
then with covid as well I don't think that helped and now
we're you know we're going to have this period where
our kids really the first
generation that have grown up heavily influenced by
social media are going to start having children yeah
(49:04):
and if we don't step in and and start helping
them you know there's there's just going to be
this crazy mess until
people start realizing until the people that are the ones causing
the mess of the one you know and not having that
decorum online are gonna start realizing hang
on this is out of hand yeah but you
(49:26):
know we need to we're fixing it before it becomes a problem like we need to
do more and i think a lot of it is not letting your kids have social media when
they're eight nine ten years old yeah 100 and i'm sure grace hated me for it
but she wasn't allowed social media Max doesn't have social media,
and I'm sure he is pissed off about it, but he...
(49:49):
Not not prepared right now and all of his friends have it they're all on snapchat
facebook everything but like i'm sorry they're always there's always something
happening there's always,
letters from the school or something about a snapchat message that shouldn't
have been sent that's gone around or pictures that have been sent that you know
um bullying that's happening with a group of boys or a group of girls with one
(50:13):
or another and there's just no way that i want him
involved in that kind of thing yet no and that's what
I said to Grace you know when she first moved
back over here all of her friends had you know Instagram and
Snapchat and all this kind of stuff and she really wanted it and
I just kept saying you know I'll think about
it I'll think about it but in my head I was going I'm just not
(50:33):
ready for you to be exposed to that kind of thing it just
opens up just a can of worms and then
when we did we made sure she was very careful you know very
secure account all this kind of stuff because i know
i know what i think there should be an age limit on it of
16 i think there is but they don't check
id so you can any old date of birth in
(50:54):
when you join instagram whatever just put
a date of birth in and you know then you have access to everything and you know
you they don't make you send id they don't make they don't verify it in any
way it's just like well I've put in that I was born in 89 so okay you must be 35.
(51:16):
Yeah you know but actually I could be 12 for all they know ridiculous yeah but
I think that's a that's a whole different topic this is security on social media
is a whole different soapbox I get onto but yeah I do think social media has
a lot to blame a lot to blame and I think like.
(51:36):
I mean, I think we could probably wrap this up there. I mean, we could talk a lot more.
Yeah, we could. And I mean, a lot more. There is so many more things to say
and unpack when we're like delving into this.
Social media, entitled behavior, bad manners, positive toxicity, toxic positivity.
(52:01):
Toxicity, I love that. That's what I say. positive
toxicity yes and
all of that yeah there's so much more that we could say like there really is
but i think we could probably just wrap it up now we'll be here all night yeah
literally yeah so on that note i want to thank everyone for listening again
(52:27):
as always if you like what
you hear make sure to subscribe give us a like and follow over on our facebook
business page the two charlottes for the tea you can also find us on tiktok
coming to instagram soon and we are pretty much on every podcast channel that
there is out there so you can find us on youtube,
(52:49):
podbean amazon i think and i hate
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reviews questions make sure to leave us a review and you can review us on our
(53:10):
facebook page as well that would be absolutely awesome and on that note we are
going to love yous and leave yous and speak you.
Hello and welcome to another episode of the
two charlottes spill the tea and today
we're going to talk about something that i am hoping a lot of you find just
as frustrating as we do and we're just we're going to talk about like when did
it become okay for people to just be.
(00:24):
Flat out rude because that's their
opinion like when when was it oh like when
did we stop you know showing respect
for other people's opinions being open-minded and
understanding that other people can see and
think and feel things differently to the way we did or
the way we do without feeling the need to be
(00:46):
like you're wrong you know when when did
we get to this point where just because that's your
opinion means you're allowed to be rude
to people and have this sense of
entitlement that you can just you
know act a certain way because well I'm
allowed to do what I want and be how I want and say what I want
(01:08):
and you have to just be okay with it you know what
happened to this whole you know be if
you haven't got anything nice to say don't say anything thing
that we were all brought up with you know I
know I was when I was a kid that was something that my mom
and used every used to say to me all the time so yeah when did it change like
what what changed yeah like kids these days I mean I don't know like we I was
(01:35):
brought up the same way you don't have anything nice to say and don't say anything
at all and like when I was a kid growing.
Up it was drilled into us to like
have respect for your elders to have good manners like
we did never like we never got anything because we didn't
remember please thank you and to ask nicely and
to be polite and you know just to mind always mind your manners mind your manners
(02:00):
I got told that so many times growing up mind your manners this it's just it's
second nature to me that you would have good manners be respectful you know like.
Even probably sounds really petty but even to the extent of like the kids that
play outside on the streets and stuff like that now like there's kids out here that,
(02:25):
I don't know, they're not that old anyway. They're not probably maybe early
teens, like 13 most, and then down to about six or maybe younger.
But they're outside at night. They're outside now, and it's dark.
I don't even know what time it is. Nine o'clock.
And you can hear them shouting, screaming, swearing.
(02:46):
And I mean, like, swearing a lot. And when I was a kid, if I'd been out of the street at that age.
Swearing and shouting and screaming like they did I
wouldn't have been allowed out yeah my parents wouldn't make me
come back in the house I mean for a start I wouldn't have been allowed out
at this time of night anyway no it's eight o'clock
(03:07):
because it's dark eight o'clock but also if
I'd been out shouting and screaming like like they
do now I would have been called in and I
would have been told you're not going outside when you behave like that like you
don't behave like that outside and it's just
I would have been brought up to be like you know be
respectful when it's late at night there's like kids asleep
(03:27):
there's young children asleep there's old people that
are asleep or trying to relax in their houses you don't
be running up and down the streets shouting and screaming and it's just even
down to things like that I just find
that there's a way that we were
brought up in in my day sounds like
I'm really old yeah sounds like a right
(03:48):
old like I'm just
saying like that's what they're doing now I wouldn't let
personally wouldn't let my own kids do that because I
think it's it's just a little bit disrespectful and rude to be acting like that
where you know when there's when it's late at night and and you're on the streets
but I think a lot of things I see these days are disrespectful and rude and
(04:10):
I wouldn't want myself or my kids to act that way yeah and it's yeah like I
think you're right like Like, when did it...
When did we get so...
Kind of lack of respect for other people that are living around where we live
it's just it seems a little bit crazy to me because yeah like you say like we
(04:30):
weren't brought up like that at all like we were brought up to have manners
but there seems to have been like a generation.
Somewhere that maybe or not I don't want to generalize and
say a whole generation but it just seems like there's less
emphasis on like kids having
manners these days or you know and
maybe not being so rude and I think like you're saying as
(04:53):
well you know you see it a lot because we've
both got kids that kind of age like teenage kids you
see it a lot in in the
behaviors and you know mannerisms and stuff like that and it's really important
I think to install morals and ethics and manners into kids like we were always
told it doesn't manners don't cost a thing it It doesn't cost you anything to
(05:17):
have good manners and it take you really far.
I can remember being told over and over again by my dad, you can be flat on
your ass, he used to say to me. You could be flat on your ass with nothing.
Right. But if you've always had good manners and been respectful and had kindness
and empathy for other people, you'll never struggle because people will always want to help you.
(05:39):
If you're polite and well-mannered and you have good morals and ethics and,
you know, treat people nicely.
If you're ever in a bad situation someone will
want to help you but if you're rude and don't
have manners and you're ignorant to people then no
one will help you if you ever get in a jam like no one's going
to want to help you because they just think you're an arsehole and you deserve
(06:00):
it yeah and like I got told
that a lot when I was growing up so it was always drilled into
me to like have good manners be polite have morals and
ethics and I was always told
to even if you don't agree with what someone
does or says or thinks if that's their opinion you
know let them have it and be polite and
(06:22):
listen I always got told listen to other people's stories and
opinions and things and see what you can learn from it
yeah I feel like we've lost that a
little bit I think so and I do think like
I think you know we were saying obviously just before we came
on today we were saying that maybe it's because now we're
kind of getting to that teenage years with our our kids that we're a bit
(06:42):
more exposed to it because none of my friends are like that like
we are not like the people that I'm
friends with and my family members we're not deliberately rude to each other
you know there's constructive criticism of course but we're not deliberately
rude but the stuff that the way that I've heard you know some of Grace's friends
(07:04):
talk to each other I'm just like.
Wow that's just blatant rudeness and
I'm just like that's just like rudeness and just
mean girl mentality and I really don't rate that
like you were always yeah brought
up manners you know respect your elders respect other
people other people's opinions you know cultures
(07:27):
religion views you know morals whatever
it is if it's somebody else's and they feel really strongly about
it that's absolutely okay you don't
have to agree but you are allowed to
agree to disagree and it doesn't need to be
this massive thing and you
know like it doesn't need to be this whole oh
(07:49):
well you don't believe in this so you're wrong you know
or you don't feel the same way I do about
this so you're wrong like but when did that become an
okay thing to do like when is it okay for somebody
to you know say oh well
what you're doing is wrong when I'm like well how do you know like that's how
I feel that's my opinion judging people on like yeah judging people on looks
(08:15):
and things like that like I know with my daughter I had orphan issues because I had dreadlock and.
And my God, like some of the girls in her school started like saying that,
oh, your mom's a druggie.
Look at her hair. Your mom definitely smokes weed. She's a druggie,
(08:36):
blah, blah, blah. Right.
And I ended up going into the school about it. And I said to them,
you need to do something about this.
Like she's getting bullied because of the way I look.
Yeah. And they were like, yes, I know. Well, you do look different,
but I know it's not really right. and I got really cross with them and I was like, you have to teach,
you have to teach kids to be more accepting that you have to do something because
(08:58):
basically it's slander what they're saying as well like it's not true like I
don't yet I don't even smoke.
And they're saying that I am a druggie and
I smoke weed and I was like that sort of stuff is damaging to
my reputation yeah slanderous and
it's all because I've got dreadlocks you know and besides
(09:18):
which like my daughter shouldn't suffer for how I choose to
dress or and just my hair your style
doesn't meet because like because
I have noticed and I've been joking about it like since
I put my dreads in so I've had
like you know how when you walk around town when you
have people like oh you know do you want to sign up
(09:38):
to this charity or donate so have a
leaflet for this or can we switch your energy bills when
I have my dreads in no one talks to me like people
use everyone used to stop me when I walk around
town I obviously have a face that means you can't say no because
90% of the time if you ask me to donate to
kids with cancer I'm going to give you all the money because I can't
(10:00):
say no yeah ever since I've had my dreads in
people just don't they don't make eye contact like
you don't have people are
giving you flyers that doesn't happen offering like
you you know to sign up to charities no not had a
single person and the only people like
I have had quite a few people don't get me wrong tell me that they
(10:22):
really like my hair but they are people that
are also dressed in a really alternative way like there was a woman by Mark
she had like everything on your face you could get pierced she had pierced like.
It looked really cool like her style was really cool and she was like yeah your.
Hair looks awesome but yeah also like the people that kind of have this alternative style.
(10:44):
But yeah, I have people looking at me really weirdly,
since putting dreadlocks in and I'm like why don't you
want to ask me if I want to donate do you think I'm poor or
something just because I've got dreadlocks and like yeah like
come on like it's it's crazy but
that's all it's funny isn't it how people judge yeah yeah
(11:05):
yeah like I I had when I had my dreadlocks in I had people actually cross over
the street so they didn't have to walk past me and I used to think do you know
what I'm probably I I I have no qualms about who I am as a person like I know
I'm probably one of the nicest people that you could ever.
Hope to meet and that I'm a genuine person so
(11:26):
and I used to think you just you're literally just taking one
look at my hair and deciding that you don't or you
know maybe the way I dress as well and deciding I'm a
horrible person but I'm probably one of the nicest
people you could meet and it's it's very judgmental and
what I find what I've
found as I've got older is that usually those kind of
(11:47):
people that are doing the judging are probably the kind
of people that need to take a long hard look in in the
mirror at themselves and see you know
it like that kind of thing is definitely a reflection on
them and they need to see what parts of
themselves they still need to work on to be a better
person because having a judgment like that like a
(12:10):
decent well-rounded happy individual doesn't judge
people based on what they look like no when
I was younger I used to it used to upset me
a little bit because I used to think like I am a really nice person like
why would you judge me like that you don't even know me but then you know I'm
also now a little bit older where I think you I don't even think about it but
(12:30):
if I was gonna think about it I'd be like your opinion means nothing to me because
I don't even know you anyway so well yeah exactly like Like,
because I used to get really,
really hung up on other people's opinions.
And I went through a phase where I had quite a few facial piercings and I'd
get really strange looks from like older people in shops.
(12:53):
And, you know, whenever I got a tattoo, like somebody, you know,
older would always make comments of, oh, well, you know, it's not going to look
nice when you're old, blah, blah, blah. Like, why are you that?
You know, all those kind of things. but I used to,
So obviously, you know, both of us, we had our first children when we were quite young.
(13:14):
So when I went to anything to do with Grace's school, all of the mums are a
good 10 to 15 years older than me.
So there was always that there was always like a handful of the parents that would be like, oh, OK.
And you could see the judgy eyes.
(13:34):
Do you know what I mean? Like I didn't even have my dreads in at this point
when I was going to these things.
But I do have tattoos I did have my nose
ring in and I'm like that you back when
we like back then as well when it's probably not
the same these days because you know it's more and
I think it depends where you live as well like over here for sure
(13:55):
it's more normal for kids for people to have kids younger
yeah but over in England you know
back in well 2000 is the
year I had my so you're talking the end of the 90s early 2000s
it was really kind of frowned upon
like I know that I was I think I was the only girl in my year at school that
(14:16):
got pregnant at 16 I think maybe one other girl yeah it was like you know shock
horror I can't believe that happened to someone so then at the school I used
to really feel it especially when I first started taking Maya to
play school I was my first experience of
that kind of thing and I felt like you know
I had dreadlocks I was alternative with my fashion
(14:39):
rainbow colors you know like yeah denim mini skirts over leggings and biker
boots and like rainbow tops and big dreadlocks and I'd walk down to take her
there and I felt like the other mums would literally be in like tweed suits
like tweed skirts and jackets and blouses and heels, you know. Yeah.
With their like, yeah, short plumbed, tidy hair and stuff. And I'd be like,
(15:05):
I just feel like they'd all be there. It felt like I was walking into a chicken
coop and they'd all be like clucking away together.
And then I'd be there like completely different and I felt really alone and kind of segregated.
But it took, it did take a big thing for them to all suddenly like be friendly with me and be nice to me.
(15:28):
But it was, that's probably a story for another day, but it was a bad situation
that happened and all of the mums that were down at the playgroup suddenly just
came and stood by my side and put their arms around me and stood up for me.
And that was quite a moment, I'm not going to lie.
It was quite a moment where it was like something bad happened to me with another
(15:53):
person coming down and causing a scene, which was not my fault.
It was just another person causing a scene, basically.
And it made everyone come and stick up
for me and I just suddenly felt like maybe I wasn't as alone as
what I thought I was or maybe because of what the
other person was like they realized that actually she's not
a bad girl yeah that's it I
(16:15):
don't really know but yeah that was that was quite mad
but I still felt it like when Maya went to school and stuff
like that I still definitely felt very judged for
how I looked yeah and even
if people don't make comments sometimes it's just facial
expressions isn't it some people's faces give it away and
yeah because I'm one of these people right so I everyone
(16:38):
jokes that I can't lie like I
can't tell lie well I can they can come out
of my mouth but my face will tell you so I just
choose not to because it's safer I get caught anyway
but I think some people yeah sometimes it's
just their their facial expressions and that's probably
something that's always been a thing like especially
(17:01):
with how people look and if you go like you
have the class systems and you know like if you go into
certain parts of different countries obviously there
is that kind of thing but what's happening now I think is open open criticism
is happening like people are just openly being like I hate your hair and it's
(17:24):
okay and I'm not allowed to say anything about it because that's their opinion.
Yeah I have you know what saying that you
saying that now made me think of something that I didn't think about
before when we were talking about this I actually think
that is to do with the rise of social media because people
are so used to hiding behind
(17:46):
their keyboards and saying stuff and being a
certain way and getting away with it like the online bullying the
trolling how rude some people are online
that it's bleeding into real life
yeah and like i'm not saying it's
okay online i absolutely detest that kind of behavior
it's not okay and it's not okay to do
(18:07):
that or be like that at all but like there's
definitely social media definitely has caused
a lot of problems in human interaction and i don't just
think it's social media i think covid coupled like
the isolation coupled with the use
of social media has a lot to answer for when it
comes to changing trends of how people behave
(18:30):
and what people have grown up with and what they used
to and you know when we grew up we didn't really have internet I mean we did
but it was really only few people that had it it was dial up it wasn't social
media it was very different so our way of of being social was by interacting
with each other and growing up in social communities.
(18:52):
If you think about it back then as well, it was totally the norm for your parents
to take you into a pub on a Saturday or a Sunday and spend hours in the pubs
while they were with their friends.
You'd be there with a bunch of other kids as well.
Everyone would be hanging out together and it was very social.
So people were accustomed to...
(19:13):
Being mindful of each other being but being kind to each other
I'll get you a drink I'll get you a drink what do the kids want you
know it was there was it was just a different time or
you know you'd be down like there was always a village fate
or yeah something and somewhere
to go to and times was a lot more social so
we were very aware of you know making sure that
(19:34):
people were included and not letting anyone be left out
and you know oh I can remember my parents
saying to me I'll make sure that you look after so-and-so you know
make sure so-and-so is okay so you'd you'd invite your friends to wherever or
wherever people are going like I remember even on bonfire night where the village
I grew up in we all went up to the park and there was a massive bonfire there
(19:56):
and a firework display and like the whole village would be up there and everyone would see everyone.
You know just always something social but
since the rise of social media
and then also so the what was it
two years in isolation and in lockdown because of
covid and you know there's just this like
(20:17):
people don't really go out anymore and socialize not to
the extent that they used to the like not as like pubs aren't as busy pubs aren't
as busy the sunday go out for a meal at the weekend with your family that doesn't
really happen these days like i remember every pub you drive past would have
a beer garden with like swings or a slide or something yeah some kind
(20:38):
of climbing frame yeah do you remember like do you remember going to
the pub at the weekend and they'd be like oh yeah the climbing frame now we
go to that pub because you don't have that anymore like most of those pubs that
you drive from one town to another and you see those big pubs they're shut down
at the side of the roads and there's no one going in them so people aren't really
as social and then obviously that on social media where it there's kind of this trend almost.
(21:02):
Where people think it's acceptable to just go on
to someone's post that they don't even know and be rude and oh
you look like you look you look fat in that what you're too fat to wear something
like you're too skinny to wear something like that oh your makeup is a joke
why why would you be so nasty to someone you don't know but that kind of behavior
I think is bleeding through into daytime yeah and it's like what I was saying
(21:25):
to you when we were talking about this earlier like,
people are given a choice that
there's an a subconscious choice that you
make every day to be a nice person or to not be a nice
person and when given the chance
to do right a lot of people don't
like yeah and it's like what I said to
(21:47):
you it's the things people do when they don't think people are
really paying attention or watching like not saying thank you when you stop
to let someone cross the road when you're in a car or not holding a door open
for someone and letting it slam in their face or giving an ignorant rude comment
to someone about the way they look or you smile at someone as you're walking
down the street and they go what's your fucking problem you know like.
(22:10):
Do you have people that can do the right thing when they think no one's watching
and hold that door open or say thank you to someone or be polite and be mannered?
Those people have a good moral standing, good ethics.
They're good people in their soul because they're doing stuff naturally.
They're doing the right thing naturally, right?
(22:31):
That subconscious choice is going on constantly to mind your manners,
have kindness, have empathy.
Thing they need it the people that you know aren't doing
that and their subconscious choice is telling them don't do
that don't need to say thanks don't be polite to that person don't smile back
be rude give a rude comment oh that person looks like shit tell them that's
(22:52):
like something very fundamentally wrong with somebody to have made that subconscious
decision to not be a nice person yeah like Like,
that's not a good trait that we want people to start developing.
If you have people all over the world making that small subconscious decision
to not be a nice person, when that multiplies, where does that leave us in 10 years time?
(23:18):
And the worrying thing is, the reason they do it is because they feel like they
can because it's their opinion.
Opinion so i'm allowed to you
know make that comment or i'm allowed
to not say thank you because why should i i
don't want to so i'm not gonna i don't owe them anything yeah i don't know them
(23:40):
why have i got like why should i say thank you why should i hold the door for
that woman with a buggy it's not my kid like yeah they'd people have got this well it's not my issue so
therefore I don't need to, it doesn't involve me, so why should I care kind of mentality.
(24:01):
And I think you're onto something with it being the rise of social media,
because I do think people are more vocally mean because they have the ability
to do it from the comfort of their own home.
And the people that probably wouldn't say anything to anyone's face will quite
(24:21):
happily say something behind an anonymous account on you know Facebook Instagram TikTok whatever.
And it is you know becoming a
thing and potentially you know like obviously I don't
want to speak for everybody but potentially like if you're a
parent that behaves that way your child is
(24:42):
seeing you behave that way so they then behave that way they behave that way
with with their friends they then grow up and have kids and they do the same
thing and the cycle repeats itself and get those you know it's it's quite scary when you think like.
Actually if this is something that is just going to become more
(25:04):
and more then it's like we're
going to end up with like no nice people it's it's just going to be me and
you that's it we'll just be you left with our
little nice flag and that's what you're saying
like about the kids watching you and what i said
about like those little actions that are so subconscious you
don't notice them through the day where you have those
(25:25):
chances every day we all have 100 million
chances probably to do the right thing to be
a good person like waiting to
let someone cross the road if it's raining or thanking that
person that's let you cross the road or you know
holding the door open for someone or letting someone skip in.
Front of you in a queue if they've only got a couple of things or you
(25:47):
know all these like small little things that you
do or remembering even when
if you're at home with your kid and they're you know
doing things and you remember to say please and thank you to
your husband or to your older kid or like even to
your child instead of it's just pass me that can
you please pass me that yeah those tiny
(26:08):
little things that that child grows
up watching like they watch everything your
mannerisms that's where they learn so you think you you turn around and go I
don't know why my child's got no manners well it's because they've been watching
you for the past 10 years and you don't have any and you've never spoken to
them with manners so you know what did you think was gonna happen like what did you expect.
(26:34):
It's just like you said like if that snowballs and
that's what they watch then you know they'll be the same way and yeah it's a
scary scary thought and I do think that living in isolation as well like for
that generation that was like or those few generations that were not at school,
(26:57):
not learning those social skills for those two years.
And you know going through that being trapped
in isolation they've only dealt with their own opinions
and their own minds so maybe as
well that's a little bit where no you're wrong actually because I don't think
that this is exactly what I think like they're so used to pleasing themselves
(27:18):
from maybe I mean I'm just I'm just throwing mud yeah just throwing ideas out
but I think no I I think it could be, it could be that.
And it could also be, you know, very much this whole, I don't know,
it's, it's really hard to say it without potentially just offending half of the population.
(27:38):
But it's this thing of, you know, be who you are, be true to yourself.
Don't, you know, fit yourself into anybody else's box.
Don't, you know, pretend to be anything that you're not, blah
blah blah but why do we
have to do that and be horrible at the same time like why
(28:00):
is why is being true to yourself being an
arsehole like and I don't know if that comes from
this whole like again online like
generation and trend of this whole
like female empowerment and be who you want
to be and don't take any you know shit from anybody and blah blah blah which
I'm all for by the way like I'm all for like you know step into your own power
(28:26):
and take control of your own life and all of that kind of stuff 100% but do you have to do that and.
Be an asshole is my question there's definitely
a thing that people need to learn that
it is okay to have very strong opinions and definitions of who you are and be
(28:47):
open to other people having the same very strong opinions and definitions of
who they are which are different to yours and you can still be the best of friends
with that person and have a great relationship because you have
understanding that we live in a very
multicultural diverse i mean
(29:08):
what are we how many genders i
don't i'm lost count so there's a lot
out there right and it's very diverse and
instead of all being adamant that we're right we can
just accept that we're right for us for our
views for my views and for who i
am what i think is right my right is not
(29:28):
the same as you're right and it's not the same as you
know bob down the streets right or anything like that but
we can all be right in our own little bubbles and still share a communal space
together with love and understanding that you know each person is right for
them exactly and i think you know like you know i've had plenty of experiences
(29:50):
over the years with people just saying oh no you.
You can't believe that that's that's not
right blah blah blah and like I'm sure you get it as well like
especially kind of being more of a spiritual person you do
get a lot of people that you know don't
understand it like there was a guy I used to work with who when he found out
(30:11):
my mother-in-law read tarot was genuinely scared of me yeah like because he
was very very religious contagious and that's cool. That's your thing. But.
In his head tarot was the devil's work and you
know and I'm like I'm trying to explain that
(30:31):
I'm like it's just a different belief system like you know
and again I'm probably going to offend loads of people but part
of me sits there and thinks Christianity is just a really nice story like
but that's my opinion like I don't need you to try and prove me wrong I don't
need to try and convince you that you know meditating and connecting to spirit
(30:52):
is more of a you know more of a faith or less of a faith than something else
like what I don't need you to convince me but,
I'm not wrong and neither are you you know exactly
in our own way I think that when you're
like if you believe in Jesus or if you believe in God
or if you believe in Shiva or
(31:12):
Shakti or Buddha or a spiritual way
of life you pray to a
higher power or give a ritual to a higher power or meditate to a higher point
of view and a higher dimension or way of being right it doesn't really matter
(31:32):
what you believe or what you do everyone that does those things with pure intentions and
love in their heart is doing it for the same reason yeah and that's what matters because.
As long as your intentions are pure and you do something like that with love
in your heart it doesn't matter what religion you are or what spiritual belief
you are your end goal is the very same and that's what's magical about that
(31:58):
if there is a god or if there is if it is shiva or or Shakti, or Allah,
or whoever it is, they don't care what medium you use, what medium works for you.
If I was a God, I would make sure there was a lot of different mediums that people could pray to me.
So there was something to suit every type of person that there was.
(32:19):
And as long as those people have pure hearts and good intentions,
it all means the same thing, really.
And there's no point telling someone they're wrong because their belief system
works for them when you're doing the same thing you're you're fundamentally
your ideals are the same if you,
(32:40):
are a good christian with good morals and good
ethics you're just the same as someone who's a good spiritualist with good morals
and good ethics you want the best for people you want to help people that are
in need of help you you know want to love your neighbor and etc etc so it's
only i I think when you're in something with bad intentions and nefarious purposes,
(33:00):
that that can then be twisted for an evil,
like, and no one can see this on the podcast, but I'm quotation marking.
Like an evil thing.
Like you can't say, like I've heard people, you know, the whole Christians and
pagan argument that, oh, it's devil worshipping.
No, it's only doing something bad if you're doing it for nefarious reasons,
(33:23):
because if someone comes into anything think with the same
intention it doesn't matter really does it what they
believe in no I think at the end of the day faith is faith whether you believe
in you know a specific faith or your own or if you just believe in yourself
and your own power and your own ability you know,
(33:48):
I don't, I don't think it should make a difference, but it does.
And it's now a really vocal thing that people think it's absolutely okay to
just say this stuff to people.
And I'm like, hang on, like what, you know, what happened to respecting other
people's opinions and allowing other people to have an opinion.
(34:10):
And it's like this kind of vicious circle of I'm allowed to say this because
it's my opinion and you have to be okay about it.
And And it's, you know, but I'm like, but no, like your opinion, I understand.
I respect it. I don't believe it. We'll agree to disagree.
You know what I think is a part of it is because videos like that,
(34:34):
like if you're on TikTok or Instagram or Facebook Reels, YouTube Shorts,
videos like that get a lot of likes, get a lot of clicks.
When you do a rude video
slagging someone off or having a pop at
something they go viral very quickly and
I think that might be a part of it I mean again I'm
(34:54):
throwing mud and seeing what sticks but no I
do not have a slight kind of frame
where people do it for the clicks and the likes yeah and
we are of you know a lot of things do revolve around
social media like you know we use social
media we you know we post stuff about our lives
on it we promote this podcast on it I do think there's a lot of
(35:16):
good things that can come out of social media you know I've got family that
live in other countries so having social media is a unified way of being able
to share what's going on in our lives when we're not together so I do think
that there's some really good things in it but I do think you're right in the
sense that actually like.
Those videos yeah having a pop at someone
(35:38):
or slagging somebody off because people want the tea they're like oh I want
to know what's going on with that person like and don't get me wrong I will
hold my hands up sometimes when I see someone arguing on Facebook I will sit
there and read every moment and I get invested and I pick a side but I don't voice my opinion to that.
Person I think and yeah and
(36:03):
while we're just on that topic actually talking about posts
and things on social media one thing that
I think is also becoming a bit of a I don't
want to say epidemic but you know a thing that's
spreading everywhere is toxic positivity so where
you know you have to be so incredibly
positive with everything and anything and you're
(36:25):
not allowed to kind of be sad about
stuff in the social media space
because you have to you know
constantly posting happy positive
uplifting stuff and then the people
that do get vulnerable and post stuff end up getting
trolled like nobody's business because how dare
(36:46):
they post that stuff on social
media and you know but also
this whole culture of oh we just have to be happy all the time there's always
somebody worse off than you are so yeah this is really bad for you but you know
it just be happy about it anyway be grateful that you know you've still got
(37:08):
this even though you've lost this you know.
Yeah yeah no I totally agree with you and and the
same then if you are vulnerable and you open up getting trolled
like you remember the whole
Caroline Slack thing you know and what happened
to her was awful and it sparked off this huge thing
of oh be kind online but people
(37:32):
say it and they aren't kind like people
aren't kind I have seen some horrific online
bullying as have you from people opening up
and being vulnerable and you have people and fair
play to like some of the people that we've seen
doing it and these are strong women mentally
strong women who have opened up about
(37:54):
incredibly heartbreaking and vulnerable topics
that they've gone through and then been on the
receiving end of some absolutely disgusting and vicious
malicious trolling so when someone does
then open up and talk about something
that could you know could push someone over the edge you know to committing
(38:17):
suicide or to doing something horrible to themselves and they're bullied like
when they do open up about a vulnerable situation and they're bullied online
like that again by these people who think it's okay to sit behind
their keyboard and talk horribly to someone because it's online and it's not face-to-face.
So they're lacking that bit of humanity in them.
(38:39):
And then, so then, yeah, you read this, this culture of people and I say people,
but really I'm looking at younger generations that are coming through,
trying to find their way in this online world, which is huge.
Like the online world, online social media has really exploded.
So you have these people, I mean, you know what it was like for us as teenagers
(39:01):
trying to make our way in the world and trying to find our identity.
So now you've got these kids doing that online where
there's adults and assholes and all sorts
of weirdos around them as well you know it's not just
their friends down in the playground yeah and they're
seeing this whole kind of this whole thing and
you know what kids are like it's monkey see monkey do so they
(39:23):
see this whole thing of people showing off what
I call and it's not just Instagram it's all social media but
what I call Instagram worthy pictures where they're set
up somewhere and their house looks like a show home and their
makeup's immaculate and everything's perfect and their life is
just perfect and they're showing you the highlight reels of
them at Costa or having a coffee somewhere or here doing
(39:43):
this and you think everything's perfect everything's perfect.
For everyone so we all have to act like everything is perfect
we have to keep up with the Jones only now the Jones are
our social media friends not our actual neighbors so
you have to keep up with them and you know you're competing
to be this like super perfect person in this super
perfect world and everything is super perfect and super fine but
(40:05):
yet obviously it isn't because real life
just is not like that and we know that because we are adults that
are well aware of that and we've been through it and yet even
in certain communities and I'm not gonna
name any names and and get bashed for it but
you know there are it was
a big thing in in online sales before for people started becoming aware of being
(40:29):
real more real and connecting with like-minded people where people would portray
this image of having loads of money and designer this and expensive days out and yeah.
You know it was the whole oh no one wants to hear what you're
going through no one wants to see you know the bad stuff
and you make sure your house is spotless and you
(40:50):
know blah blah blah where it's not real like people
who have like single mums with kids don't have spotless
houses I'm sorry do you have kids and your house is spotless you
have a problem there's something wrong there's something
wrong with your kids and you need to take them to get them checked out because
if you have pets and kids then there's
(41:11):
no hope for you your house is going to be a mess for the next 20
years i'm sorry but it's just how it is like
there will always be fur and toys everywhere
and clothes as they get older the toys
disappear and it turns to clothes and like
lunch boxes and school bags and
other bags and just do it everywhere so you
(41:33):
can't have a picture perfect house sometimes bills come
in and your skin and shit happens and life
gets tough and you should be allowed to be real in
your space without getting trolled for
it or getting bullied for it or having people go why is she posting all of her
you know oh look at so-and-so over there telling everyone about that what's
(41:53):
going on like who she thinks she is or or whatever other people do and say and
this this whole vibe of like oh my life's falling apart but I'm fine I'm fine
No, honestly, guys, everything is sunshine.
Thank God I lived to see another day. You know, that is toxic positivity.
If you feel that you can't say, look, I'm sorry, I'm having a shit day.
I'm not going to be on social media for a while. I don't need sympathy.
(42:16):
I don't need a hundred messages saying, you're right, babe. No,
I'm just having a shit day. So just leave me alone. Yeah.
It's fine. Okay, we'll leave you alone for today. We'll talk to you tomorrow.
Yeah. Yeah. It's that, like, I don't need to. It's so fake.
I don't know if you've seen that episode of Friends where,
(42:40):
It's like later into the seasons where Ross is with Charlie and Joey's now dating
Rachel and he makes fajitas.
And the whole time he's like, I'm fine. I'm fine. I'm fine.
I'm fine. I'm fine.
And he's not fine. And he gets absolutely legless drunk and burns his hands on the fajita pan.
(43:02):
Because that is what social media is like when your world's falling apart.
Like I'm fine I'm fine and you're not fine like
oh my god and it's so good like
it's okay to not be
okay and I know that's really like
that's such a cheesy line and actually to be honest I'm not a massive
(43:23):
fan of it because it's a bit like but it
is actually okay like but what's not
okay is to and I feel
like this might end up being another episode but it's not okay to
unpack and live in the chaos all the time it's okay
to be it's okay to be sad it's okay to be run down and tired and depressed and
(43:45):
stressed and struggling but it's not okay to sit in that for like weeks and
months and years on end and that is an excuse yeah that's a whole different kettle of fish like.
It's also not okay to belittle and
abuse and be rude to somebody who is having bad times like we talk about oh
(44:09):
it's okay to not be okay and yeah there are a lot of us like me and you that
will be happy to sit with someone and you know help them out of that kind of place but there
are likewise a lot of people who treat that and will share posts and share stuff
on social media saying it's okay, my inbox is always open.
(44:31):
Yeah, when they'll give them the actual chance to do some real good and help
someone, I can guarantee you that they will not.
And they will go and you know they can bully other people and I see it in younger generations,
doing it a lot and the ignorance and the rudeness and just again you know I
see a lot of because obviously I watch a lot of like fitness and weight loss
(44:54):
stuff and I see a lot of reels of girls trying to lose weight and other girls
just commenting on there like why bother you're fat and ugly.
Yeah you know oh you say you've lost
weight but you're still fat you know like what is
your problem that you would say something like that to someone who's trying
to improve themselves or trying to do something for themselves like how could
(45:17):
you be so rude and so then that kind of comment is there's just it's just cruel
and that's like I think that you know that's literally the.
Thing is like why is that okay why like and
like i said right at the beginning of the episode when did it
become okay to just be rude to people because
(45:37):
it's your view or your opinion
yeah like what like when did this
become a thing like when i think like with the
whole rise of social media like we
need to do more to prepare
protect and help our children in that
world yeah because they're the ones that
(45:59):
are growing up in that world and it's so unmonitored you know
and like we didn't have it when we we I didn't
have social media till I was like 19 probably 1920
yeah to be fair i got facebook just
after grace was born so yeah i was 19
when i actually got facebook when i moved here yeah so that was in 2008 so i
(46:23):
was in my 20s i did have social media it was msn oh yeah i had i had msn i'd
msn self and i did have a bebo account.
And I got very upset if I didn't get
love hearts every day from people I won't lie completely
revolved around myself but you know
like we weren't exposed to it in the
(46:46):
same sense that we are now like it's such a huge part of our everyone's life
now even if you try and stay off social media there'll always be something that
will make you and that people talk about it on the telly you know you say oh
they do it for the likes everyone knows what you mean yeah.
Everyone knows what you're like when we were kids if someone
(47:08):
said oh you're doing it for the likes no one would have had a clue what you
everyone had been like what what what are you talking about but now when you
say something like that everyone knows what it means yeah and yeah like that
needs to be we we need to step in i think and do something to help our children learn that
(47:30):
empathy,
understanding, kindness and compassion has to bleed through to social media as well.
Yeah. It shouldn't just be something you do to your family and your close friends.
It should be something that you let go into your whole entire life.
Yeah. Always treating people with the kindness and compassion that,
(47:54):
you know, you would want to be treated with
yeah and you know that's something
i do think as parents is our responsibility
yeah who you know feed
into our children and i do it with grace quite
a lot you know she went through a phase of being bullied and
i understood how she felt and we you know we
(48:16):
work through that but there was also a conversation
of you know we don't know what's going
on in that person's personal life but
it doesn't excuse being just a dick yeah really that is a nice way to put it
sorry yeah yeah definitely like it is something that really needs to be looked into because.
(48:44):
It's gone crazy in our generation and
then with covid as well I don't think that helped and now
we're you know we're going to have this period where
our kids really the first
generation that have grown up heavily influenced by
social media are going to start having children yeah
(49:04):
and if we don't step in and and start helping
them you know there's there's just going to be
this crazy mess until
people start realizing until the people that are the ones causing
the mess of the one you know and not having that
decorum online are gonna start realizing hang
on this is out of hand yeah but you
(49:26):
know we need to we're fixing it before it becomes a problem like we need to
do more and i think a lot of it is not letting your kids have social media when
they're eight nine ten years old yeah 100 and i'm sure grace hated me for it
but she wasn't allowed social media Max doesn't have social media,
and I'm sure he is pissed off about it, but he...
(49:49):
Not not prepared right now and all of his friends have it they're all on snapchat
facebook everything but like i'm sorry they're always there's always something
happening there's always,
letters from the school or something about a snapchat message that shouldn't
have been sent that's gone around or pictures that have been sent that you know
um bullying that's happening with a group of boys or a group of girls with one
(50:13):
or another and there's just no way that i want him
involved in that kind of thing yet no and that's what
I said to Grace you know when she first moved
back over here all of her friends had you know Instagram and
Snapchat and all this kind of stuff and she really wanted it and
I just kept saying you know I'll think about
it I'll think about it but in my head I was going I'm just not
(50:33):
ready for you to be exposed to that kind of thing it just
opens up just a can of worms and then
when we did we made sure she was very careful you know very
secure account all this kind of stuff because i know
i know what i think there should be an age limit on it of
16 i think there is but they don't check
id so you can any old date of birth in
(50:54):
when you join instagram whatever just put
a date of birth in and you know then you have access to everything and you know
you they don't make you send id they don't make they don't verify it in any
way it's just like well I've put in that I was born in 89 so okay you must be 35.
(51:16):
Yeah you know but actually I could be 12 for all they know ridiculous yeah but
I think that's a that's a whole different topic this is security on social media
is a whole different soapbox I get onto but yeah I do think social media has
a lot to blame a lot to blame and I think like.
(51:36):
I mean, I think we could probably wrap this up there. I mean, we could talk a lot more.
Yeah, we could. And I mean, a lot more. There is so many more things to say
and unpack when we're like delving into this.
Social media, entitled behavior, bad manners, positive toxicity, toxic positivity.
(52:01):
Toxicity, I love that. That's what I say. positive
toxicity yes and
all of that yeah there's so much more that we could say like there really is
but i think we could probably just wrap it up now we'll be here all night yeah
literally yeah so on that note i want to thank everyone for listening again
(52:27):
as always if you like what
you hear make sure to subscribe give us a like and follow over on our facebook
business page the two charlottes for the tea you can also find us on tiktok
coming to instagram soon and we are pretty much on every podcast channel that
there is out there so you can find us on youtube,
(52:49):
podbean amazon i think and i hate
others i can't remember them all i think i heart radio
or something like that as well but make sure to like
subscribe follow please email us or get in touch with us if you have any thoughts
reviews questions make sure to leave us a review and you can review us on our
(53:10):
facebook page as well that would be absolutely awesome and on that note we are
going to love yous and leave yous and speak you.
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