September 1, 2024 • 22 mins
Navigating NFL Fan Loyalty and Dallas Cowboys Analysis In this episode, hosts Alex Hardy and Nick Ferguson discuss the latest happenings in the NFL, focusing on the Dallas Cowboys. They cover the preseason, roster cuts, and CeeDee Lamb's substantial contract extension. Special guest Brenda Kradolfer, a Laura Boyle certified relationship coach, joins to explore the emotional dynamics of being a loyal Cowboys fan, comparing it to a one-sided relationship. The episode also touches on team management, player potential, and self-care for fans disillusioned by years of unmet expectations.
00:00 Introduction and Preseason Recap
01:44 Dallas Cowboys Contract News
04:25 Dallas Cowboys Fan Experience
04:59 Interview with Brenda Kradolfer
05:38 The Emotional Rollercoaster of Being a Cowboys Fan
15:31 The Power of the Cowboys Brand
20:21 Closing Thoughts and Promotions
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:12):
We are those guys, we hope to beyour guys, bringing you the latest
around the National Football League.
I'm Alex Hardy, joined as alwaysby our former 10 year safety in
the National Football League.
Nick Ferguson, the preseason has comeand gone, roster cuts as we speak, and
something happening in jerry world,which we'll get into shortly here.
(00:33):
How's it going, my man?
It's going well, man.
Uh, now the preseason is over.
Now we get a chance to see what teamslook like in the regular season.
And oh, by the way, weknow what the rules are.
Usually there are teams thatdon't perform well in preseason
that get off to a great start.
And then there are others whostart great in the preseason.
(00:56):
And the start of theseason is very subpar.
So don't get too high, don't gettoo low, but the regular season
is right around the corner.
Well, we can get into the onlyteam that didn't throw a touchdown
pass during the entire preseason.
Nick, you want to guess?
Your Patriots.
That would be the New York Giants.
(01:17):
Somebody worse than myNew England Patriots.
Thank you very much.
Uh, meanwhile, you compare that tothis time a year ago, the preseason
QB rating leader was, can you pickhow they sometimes fall or those
who, uh, to quote a line from thereplacements, not even a has been Nick,
(01:40):
you're a never was.
Uh, Nick Ferguson.
I'm going to get into what the DallasCowboys have done, which believe it
or not, for a change, is something.
We have a four year, 136 millioncontract extension, and here's
the important number, 67 millionguaranteed at signing for C.
D.
Lamb.
Last year's, uh, NFL receiving leader.
(02:03):
So Nick, we've got one of thebig pillars done in Dallas.
Jerry Jones said he wasn't going toworry, but now you have a guy who
was, uh, holding out and now we're twoweeks from the start of the season.
Um, do you expect ahappy, content city lamb?
Is this more about whathappens for Dak Prescott next?
Or, um, your thoughts on, you know, abig contract being handed out to a One
(02:26):
of the best players in the NFL last year.
Well, Alex, let's justlook at it this way.
It's been the Off season of the widereceivers and I'm going to choose all
the above for 500 as it pertains tothe Dallas Cowboys because yes, does
it mean something for Dak Prescott?
And it does because what Jerry is saying.
(02:49):
We'd rather go with thewide receiver and pay C.
D.
Lamb opposed to giving youyour money, Dak Prescott.
Now, things could change, but it seemslike everything is moving towards
Dak playing, playing out his contractand possibly being someone else.
But when you look at CeeDeeLamb, he is going to be happy.
(03:09):
A holdout has never yielded these types ofresults, where a wide receiver is making
more, or on the level of quarterbacks.
Unreal!
And if you are Jamar Chase,all you're doing is Mr.
Burns from The Simpsons.
Excellent.
You just can't wait.
(03:30):
And if you are Brandon Ayuk, You'rejust sitting back with your feet up,
probably smoking a stogie, saying, youknow what, my time is coming, John Lynch,
Kyle Shanahan, put the money in the bag.
Those are your guys there in SanFrancisco, Nick, and again, you have
to give credit to C Lamb for, uh,Holding out, I'd put it because he did
(03:54):
ultimately get what he was looking for.
And furthermore, for everyone criticizing,Oh, Jones just got this deal done six
months ago before Justin Jefferson, beforeall these other guys, I'm on Ross St.
Brown, but it takes two to tango.
So if CD purposefully waitedfor the market to kind of shake
out, he's the one now looking.
(04:16):
Mighty fine knowing that hisfuture is cemented in Dallas.
Meanwhile, only there for four more years,so he could hit the market once again.
Nick, we're talking aboutthese Dallas Cowboys.
In each episode, you get to preview an NFLteam that we believe can be a contender.
Uh, kind of some highlights fromthe previous season, what to
(04:37):
expect for 2024 as the regularseason is just around the corner.
And what we'd like to do here onRide the Wave Media is bring on
compadres, uh, those of us here onthe network with their own podcast,
uh, so we can share and promoteand create content with each other.
So to talk about the Dallas Cowboys,we have a Cowboys fan with us.
(04:59):
We're we're joined now by BrendaCridolfer, who you can find right
here on ride the wave media, thehost of the restored wife podcast.
She is a Laura Boylecertified relationship coach.
And I think more so than just digginginto the Dallas Cowboys themselves.
I think the relationship thatit is for Dallas Cowboy fans is
(05:21):
something that we really need to.
Sit down on the proverbial couch anddig through some of the scar tissue.
Brenda, thank you so much for joining us.
And how are you doing?
Welcome to those guys.
Thank you.
Thank you so much for having me.
I'm doing awesome.
So glad to be here.
So Nick, when you talk about theDallas Cowboys, you know, they won
(05:43):
12 games, three years in a row.
What expectations do you have orshould I say expectations Is 12
wins and the lack of playoff successenough as far as you're concerned?
Well, a lack of playoff success.
No, not for this organizationand this fan base.
(06:04):
You know, since we talked to Brendan,we're talking about relationships.
When I look at the Dallas Cowboys,it's almost like a love with scorn.
Like your lover goes out andcheats on you all the time.
And to make up for it, they come back withthese gifts and these gifts are playoffs.
These gifts are guys with hefty contracts.
Look at what I've done for you.
Meanwhile, you still walk away withthe same level of disappointment.
(06:27):
Several months later becausethey're going to break your heart.
And it's unfortunate because Idon't really blame the players.
And Brenda, you tell me, Idon't really blame the players.
See, I blame management.
See, the management is not doing a greatjob as far as getting a bunch of players.
And Alex, you mentionedthis, so I'll bring it up.
Jerry could have gotten this deal done.
(06:48):
Earlier before with JustinJefferson's, but guess what?
He's Jerry Jones and he's been knownto be a very stubborn negotiator.
So he put himself in this toughsituation because CD got his money.
What about Micah?
What about Dak?
I mean, no Dak, you in trouble.
Then you may be holding outfor Shadur Sanders, but you're
still going to be in trouble.
(07:09):
Nonetheless, Brenda.
Can you talk about a relationshipwhere a fan may give and give and
give their time, their money if theybuy a new jersey, um, or just their,
their, um, their mental capacity.
Uh, and for a Dallas Cowboys team that hasvirtually given them nothing in return,
(07:30):
it's been 30 years almost, 1995 sincethe Cowboys were last in a Super Bowl.
Yeah.
Yeah, and they have loyal fans.
They've got a loyal fan base.
That have just stuck around, right?
And they're holding out.
I'm, yeah, I just, when, when, when onesided relationship gives, I don't know
(07:55):
if there's anything to expect in return.
Um, kind of navigating, uh, you know,giving what's really unconditional
love and support for a football team.
Does that compare it tokind of a relationship?
Sure.
I think there's lots of relationshipsthat are, that can, Look one sided.
(08:15):
Um, but it's so nuanced.
There's so much going on.
There's so much at play, justlike Nick mentioned, you know,
you've got management involved.
You got the fans involved.
You got the media involved.
You've got players and you'vegot new players coming on.
And, um, there's just a lot at play.
And the same thing aswith any relationship too.
It's like, like, I know theseDallas Cowboy fans are strong fans.
(08:36):
They're not going anywhere.
They're going to be there.
For the next 30 years too.
Um, and really just, I mean,they're not, they're not going
anywhere, but what are, what arethe Cowboys going to do to really.
to really give back at this point.
And it sounds like they're,they're on their way, potentially.
(08:57):
See, see, there, there's that word again.
See, potential.
See, see, potential is a very dirty wordin the, in the realm of sports because
we always hear that tossed around.
This guy has potential.
This guy has potential.
But at some point you have to elevate yourplay where you supersede that potential.
And I know right now, you know,the Cowboys fans invested because
(09:22):
Where else are they going to go?
Right?
They have nowhere else to go.
They've been diehard fans forever.
Jerry Jones isn't going anywhere.
So now, you are trapped in a relationship.
You can't get out.
I mean, it's, it's, it's likeCowboys fans live in a glass house.
And if you drive by and you lookat them, they scratch this all
over the glass because they'retrying to get out, but they can't.
(09:47):
Is that just the nameof the Cowboys brand?
I don't know how you can turn the tableson someone who's been wielding so much
power in this unhealthy relationship.
I'm wondering, you know, stopgoing to games, stop buying
jerseys, give the cold shoulder.
Is there a better way of trying totalk and work through issues together?
(10:09):
You watch the games and youlower the bar a little bit.
I just How do you provide some selfcare when maybe you're not getting
that from, from your partner?
And this is the case, the Dallas Cowboys.
Yeah.
Well, number one, our selfcare is our responsibility.
Our happiness is our responsibility.
So I had to learn that.
(10:30):
That was a hard lesson for me tolearn in my, in my own relationship
that, that my partner wasn't goingto be the one to make me happy.
He could add to it for sure.
But if I was miserable,I was choosing that.
And so, so yeah, I don't know ifthere's, I mean, like you got to
take care of number one first.
And I don't mean that in a selfish way.
(10:52):
I mean that in a make, make sureyou're, make sure you're good.
Right.
And I don't think any of these fans aregonna, you know, do anything crazy when
their team isn't doing so hot, but Idon't think they're going anywhere either.
I think they're really.
Just dedicated.
And I think it's part of that culturetoo, that Texas pride, like, and
I'm not even from Texas and, and Iwas just telling Alex earlier, like
(11:14):
I'm a fan because growing up, myfamily were just literal Cowboys.
They were farmers, they were ranchers,they had cattle, they rode horses.
And so they just gravitatedtowards the team.
And so, you know, I just followed alongand, and that's how I became a fan in
my younger years of the Dallas Cowboys.
I'm gonna, I'm just a littlefull of transparency here.
(11:35):
So I grew up in Miami andeveryone in my family, they are
diehard Miami Dolphins fans.
And as I was growing up, this iskind of when I felt as though I
was coming into my own as a man.
I separated from the family.
Why?
Because I got sick and tiredof watching the Dolphins lose.
They start off 8 0, they play ateam in Buffalo and Jim Kelly,
(11:58):
then all of a sudden they tank.
And I'm like, no, I'm sick and tired ofdoing this to myself every single year.
I'm going to high school pissed offbecause the Dolphins lost on Sunday.
I was like, you know what?
It's time for a divorce.
And right then in high school,I divorced the Miami Dolphins.
They're not going to do it to me.
So the Cowboys fans, they do have choices.
(12:19):
There's 31 other teams that they canroot for, or you can say, you know what?
I'm not going to root for a team.
I'm just going to root foran individual on a team.
I mean, it's okay to divorce your team.
And listen, I'm all for people formingrelationships and stay together.
But if you're in a toxic relationship,at some point, like you said, I mean,
(12:42):
you got to be a little selfish and thinkabout self care and divorce that team.
That's what the D inDallas stand for divorce.
Well, it's, that's hard to do when, uh,it's tied to your occupation, right?
When they introduced the, uh, the, uh,the, the Dallas podcasters, I don't
think any of us could ever not root forthat team because that's what we do.
(13:05):
Um, but I think that is a, likesuch a, uh, fascinating, um, way
to identify with a certain team.
Um, and the way that they playmaybe reflects the hard work and
blue collar nature, um, that aliteral cowboy would be doing.
So of all the stories, Nick, where youhear a woman come to you and tells you why
(13:25):
they're a fan of your play or football ingeneral, uh, where, where does that rank?
That you are a cowboy,you're a cowboy fan.
Well, I'm going to push thisoff on the media, right?
I know that sounds, youknow, right up the alley.
Oh, I just blame the media.
They're the culprits for everything.
But it is true.
(13:46):
Growing up in Miami, I knew individualswho became Dallas Cowboys fans.
Why?
Because that's all they saw on television.
And oh, by the way, the taglinewas, America's team and everyone
wants to be patriotic, right?
I mean, you see me wearing kindof red, white, and blue now.
So kids wanted to be patriotic,the star on the helmet, you
(14:07):
know, Tom Landry, right?
All those guys, Emmitt Smith, Troy Aikman.
So they became Dallas Cowboys fan.
And this is why it's a little difficultfor the Cowboys fans to break away
from it because it's the brand.
You buy into a brand.
This is why fandom is so real.
This is why fans cheer.
This is why they buy the jerseys.
(14:27):
Even when teams suck, they still go tothe games because fandom is a real thing.
And that brand isembedded in them because.
It happens to us early on.
You're four years old, your dad sitsyou in front of the television, you're
watching the game, and then you'recozying up to him, and it's so nostalgic.
So when you grow up, you wantthat same feel with your kids,
(14:50):
so you do the same thing to them.
Hopefully, you're rooting for a winningteam and not a team that have been
known to cheat like the Patriots.
I mean, that's something I heard.
I don't know how true it is,but that's something I heard.
Nick, it's a good reminder for Brenda.
And for any of the other Ride theWave, uh, media listeners that
(15:11):
have not found our Apple TV rewatchseries of the Patriots Dynasty,
We, we talk about all of it.
So, by no means, Nick, do you needto be digging up skeletons here and
talking about things that I thoughtwere properly addressed, uh, which
you could find right here on thepodcasts or, uh, YouTube feeds.
Some of our earlierepisodes here on those guys.
(15:31):
Uh, and Nick, you mentioned aboutthat brand and, uh, Brenda, I thought
this was fascinating because anotherway to access the Dallas Cowboys
has nothing to do with football.
And it was actually a conversation Ihad with my wife because she watched
on Netflix, America's Sweetheartsabout the Dallas Cowboys cheerleaders.
Then being an extension of thestar on the side of the helmet.
(15:54):
Um, so I know Brenda, like watching, uh,professional cheerleaders kind of in that
make and mold of the Dallas Cowboys image.
Is that something that, you know,as a relationship coach, was that
something that you saw that lookedhealthy on the outside or kind of the
approach to that work and life balance?
(16:18):
Oh, I'm not sure if Iunderstand the question, Alex.
I just, when you're watchingit, it doesn't seem real.
It's people there to do a job,but they really are just the
face of the Dallas Cowboys.
I was curious, kind of, what you saw.
Um, you know, from that Netflixseries Yeah, we talked about that.
(16:43):
And I think it goes to Nick'spoint, like, this is a machine,
this is a, this is a product.
Right.
And, and they've pushed itfor a long time, and I think
they've done a really good job.
And, and again, like calling thosecheerleaders, America's sweethearts,
they're not just, you know,the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders,
they're America's cheerleaders.
Um, watching that series is.
(17:05):
It's eyeopening, but one thingthat I re really saw in that was
that they are creating a product.
And if you don't fit that productfor whatever reason, it could be,
you know, nothing to do with whoyou are or how talented you are.
If you don't fit the product, you're notgonna be one of America's sweethearts
and there's not a thing you can doabout it because they do have such
(17:27):
strong branding and such a strong.
You know, historical media presence,as Nick was saying, and they've, you
know, they've, they've carried it onand they've, and they've continued
to build on that, uh, off of that.
So I'll say this, Alex, really quickly,because when you think about the Dallas
Cowboys and so many other teams, and it's,it's interesting that we're talking about
(17:52):
the Dallas Cowboys because it is one ofthe most, I guess, recognizable teams.
and professional sports.
I think right now they may, I think JerryJones, I think they what, rank number
one in NFL as far as the franchise value.
They may be, it was seven, ninebillion or something like that.
(18:14):
Too many zeros.
Yeah, it's too many zeros to count,but it goes back to, okay, what is
a fan's relationship with a team?
Everyone wants to beassociated with a winner.
You mentioned that theteam hasn't been relevant.
Since 1995, almost 30years, that's a long time.
(18:34):
I mean, while you're going to have a groupof fans continue to cheer for the Dallas
Cowboys, because once again, they'reassociated with nostalgia, with their
grandfather, their father, whomever.
But it does come a point where youstart to look around and notice
that you're kind of all alone atthe bottom with the New York Giants.
(18:56):
And you don't want to be there.
So what other options do you have?
And I just go back towhat Brenda said earlier.
I mean, self care is so, soimportant, but you got to start
thinking about you, because I knowI'm not the only person when I was
rooting for a particular person.
Uh, organization that went toschool to work angry that next day
(19:19):
because they didn't perform well.
I'm like, wait a minute.
I mean, I'm a fan, but I didn't play.
They, they're not paying me.
So why the hell I'm upset.
So that's where the DallasCowboys fans need to be.
Celebrate the fact that CeeDeeLamb signed a massive contract.
Hope that you can keep the group together.
But at some point you got tomake some tough decisions.
(19:39):
How long do you want to continueto put yourself through this
emotional rollercoaster?
And that's what the Dallas Cowboys alwayswill be an emotional rollercoaster.
You have so many high highs and lowlows with playoff disappointments
year after year, 29 going on 30 years.
He's Nick Ferguson.
(19:59):
I'm Alex Hardy and joinedagain, Brenna Cordolfo.
You can find her on theRestored Wife podcast.
She is a Laura Boyle certifiedrelationship coach and day by day,
We're getting better at managingour relationships as NFL fans with
our teams, some of whom deliver, uh,those like the Dallas Cowboys, it's.
It's been a long time.
(20:21):
Uh, the last, uh, item that wehave here for those guys, typically
this is Nick before we split,because Brenda, you are our guest.
Brenda, before we split, uh, in anyway you'd like to connect with our
audience, um, anything you'd want topromote for Restored Wife or anything
you have going on right now, uh,within Daybreak or Ride the Wave
Media before we get on out of here.
(20:42):
Sure.
Thank you so much.
And thank you so much for having me.
This has been a blast.
Um, I just, I'm leaving with thisquestion of like, what are we not seeing?
Like what is underneaththe surface of this team?
What, what, what is still therethat was there in the past?
Um, that maybe even theorganization has forgot about.
So that's the question thatI'm leaving with here today.
And, um, as far as what I'mdoing, I am putting on a workshop.
(21:06):
It's called the EmpoweredWife Workshop and I help women
become ridiculously happy wives.
No matter their circumstances.
And I would love to, I would love toconnect with whoever is just either in a
really tough spot in their relationship orthings are pretty good and they just want
them to be like the best that they can be.
So you can find me at The RestoredWife Podcast and also on social
(21:29):
media at Brenda Kurdolfer and TheRestored Wife Podcast on Instagram.
She's Brenda Kurdolfer.
Nick, anything to say to the peoplebefore we head on out of here?
Yeah, just because you are from aregion or area of the United States
doesn't necessarily mean that youhave to continue with the family
(21:50):
tradition of rooting for a loser.
I, too, was in that program,but I got myself out.
You can, too, as well.
I'm Nick Ferguson and I have aproblem, but I don't have one anymore.
No, I don't, and I approve this message.
Thanks, everyone.
We are those guys, we hope to beyour guys, bringing you the latest
around the National Football League.
I'm Alex Hardy, joined as alwaysby our former 10 year safety in
the National Football League.
Nick Ferguson, the preseason has comeand gone, roster cuts as we speak, and
something happening in jerry world,which we'll get into shortly here.
(00:33):
How's it going, my man?
It's going well, man.
Uh, now the preseason is over.
Now we get a chance to see what teamslook like in the regular season.
And oh, by the way, weknow what the rules are.
Usually there are teams thatdon't perform well in preseason
that get off to a great start.
And then there are others whostart great in the preseason.
(00:56):
And the start of theseason is very subpar.
So don't get too high, don't gettoo low, but the regular season
is right around the corner.
Well, we can get into the onlyteam that didn't throw a touchdown
pass during the entire preseason.
Nick, you want to guess?
Your Patriots.
That would be the New York Giants.
(01:17):
Somebody worse than myNew England Patriots.
Thank you very much.
Uh, meanwhile, you compare that tothis time a year ago, the preseason
QB rating leader was, can you pickhow they sometimes fall or those
who, uh, to quote a line from thereplacements, not even a has been Nick,
(01:40):
you're a never was.
Uh, Nick Ferguson.
I'm going to get into what the DallasCowboys have done, which believe it
or not, for a change, is something.
We have a four year, 136 millioncontract extension, and here's
the important number, 67 millionguaranteed at signing for C.
D.
Lamb.
Last year's, uh, NFL receiving leader.
(02:03):
So Nick, we've got one of thebig pillars done in Dallas.
Jerry Jones said he wasn't going toworry, but now you have a guy who
was, uh, holding out and now we're twoweeks from the start of the season.
Um, do you expect ahappy, content city lamb?
Is this more about whathappens for Dak Prescott next?
Or, um, your thoughts on, you know, abig contract being handed out to a One
(02:26):
of the best players in the NFL last year.
Well, Alex, let's justlook at it this way.
It's been the Off season of the widereceivers and I'm going to choose all
the above for 500 as it pertains tothe Dallas Cowboys because yes, does
it mean something for Dak Prescott?
And it does because what Jerry is saying.
(02:49):
We'd rather go with thewide receiver and pay C.
D.
Lamb opposed to giving youyour money, Dak Prescott.
Now, things could change, but it seemslike everything is moving towards
Dak playing, playing out his contractand possibly being someone else.
But when you look at CeeDeeLamb, he is going to be happy.
(03:09):
A holdout has never yielded these types ofresults, where a wide receiver is making
more, or on the level of quarterbacks.
Unreal!
And if you are Jamar Chase,all you're doing is Mr.
Burns from The Simpsons.
Excellent.
You just can't wait.
(03:30):
And if you are Brandon Ayuk, You'rejust sitting back with your feet up,
probably smoking a stogie, saying, youknow what, my time is coming, John Lynch,
Kyle Shanahan, put the money in the bag.
Those are your guys there in SanFrancisco, Nick, and again, you have
to give credit to C Lamb for, uh,Holding out, I'd put it because he did
(03:54):
ultimately get what he was looking for.
And furthermore, for everyone criticizing,Oh, Jones just got this deal done six
months ago before Justin Jefferson, beforeall these other guys, I'm on Ross St.
Brown, but it takes two to tango.
So if CD purposefully waitedfor the market to kind of shake
out, he's the one now looking.
(04:16):
Mighty fine knowing that hisfuture is cemented in Dallas.
Meanwhile, only there for four more years,so he could hit the market once again.
Nick, we're talking aboutthese Dallas Cowboys.
In each episode, you get to preview an NFLteam that we believe can be a contender.
Uh, kind of some highlights fromthe previous season, what to
(04:37):
expect for 2024 as the regularseason is just around the corner.
And what we'd like to do here onRide the Wave Media is bring on
compadres, uh, those of us here onthe network with their own podcast,
uh, so we can share and promoteand create content with each other.
So to talk about the Dallas Cowboys,we have a Cowboys fan with us.
(04:59):
We're we're joined now by BrendaCridolfer, who you can find right
here on ride the wave media, thehost of the restored wife podcast.
She is a Laura Boylecertified relationship coach.
And I think more so than just digginginto the Dallas Cowboys themselves.
I think the relationship thatit is for Dallas Cowboy fans is
(05:21):
something that we really need to.
Sit down on the proverbial couch anddig through some of the scar tissue.
Brenda, thank you so much for joining us.
And how are you doing?
Welcome to those guys.
Thank you.
Thank you so much for having me.
I'm doing awesome.
So glad to be here.
So Nick, when you talk about theDallas Cowboys, you know, they won
(05:43):
12 games, three years in a row.
What expectations do you have orshould I say expectations Is 12
wins and the lack of playoff successenough as far as you're concerned?
Well, a lack of playoff success.
No, not for this organizationand this fan base.
(06:04):
You know, since we talked to Brendan,we're talking about relationships.
When I look at the Dallas Cowboys,it's almost like a love with scorn.
Like your lover goes out andcheats on you all the time.
And to make up for it, they come back withthese gifts and these gifts are playoffs.
These gifts are guys with hefty contracts.
Look at what I've done for you.
Meanwhile, you still walk away withthe same level of disappointment.
(06:27):
Several months later becausethey're going to break your heart.
And it's unfortunate because Idon't really blame the players.
And Brenda, you tell me, Idon't really blame the players.
See, I blame management.
See, the management is not doing a greatjob as far as getting a bunch of players.
And Alex, you mentionedthis, so I'll bring it up.
Jerry could have gotten this deal done.
(06:48):
Earlier before with JustinJefferson's, but guess what?
He's Jerry Jones and he's been knownto be a very stubborn negotiator.
So he put himself in this toughsituation because CD got his money.
What about Micah?
What about Dak?
I mean, no Dak, you in trouble.
Then you may be holding outfor Shadur Sanders, but you're
still going to be in trouble.
(07:09):
Nonetheless, Brenda.
Can you talk about a relationshipwhere a fan may give and give and
give their time, their money if theybuy a new jersey, um, or just their,
their, um, their mental capacity.
Uh, and for a Dallas Cowboys team that hasvirtually given them nothing in return,
(07:30):
it's been 30 years almost, 1995 sincethe Cowboys were last in a Super Bowl.
Yeah.
Yeah, and they have loyal fans.
They've got a loyal fan base.
That have just stuck around, right?
And they're holding out.
I'm, yeah, I just, when, when, when onesided relationship gives, I don't know
(07:55):
if there's anything to expect in return.
Um, kind of navigating, uh, you know,giving what's really unconditional
love and support for a football team.
Does that compare it tokind of a relationship?
Sure.
I think there's lots of relationshipsthat are, that can, Look one sided.
(08:15):
Um, but it's so nuanced.
There's so much going on.
There's so much at play, justlike Nick mentioned, you know,
you've got management involved.
You got the fans involved.
You got the media involved.
You've got players and you'vegot new players coming on.
And, um, there's just a lot at play.
And the same thing aswith any relationship too.
It's like, like, I know theseDallas Cowboy fans are strong fans.
(08:36):
They're not going anywhere.
They're going to be there.
For the next 30 years too.
Um, and really just, I mean,they're not, they're not going
anywhere, but what are, what arethe Cowboys going to do to really.
to really give back at this point.
And it sounds like they're,they're on their way, potentially.
(08:57):
See, see, there, there's that word again.
See, potential.
See, see, potential is a very dirty wordin the, in the realm of sports because
we always hear that tossed around.
This guy has potential.
This guy has potential.
But at some point you have to elevate yourplay where you supersede that potential.
And I know right now, you know,the Cowboys fans invested because
(09:22):
Where else are they going to go?
Right?
They have nowhere else to go.
They've been diehard fans forever.
Jerry Jones isn't going anywhere.
So now, you are trapped in a relationship.
You can't get out.
I mean, it's, it's, it's likeCowboys fans live in a glass house.
And if you drive by and you lookat them, they scratch this all
over the glass because they'retrying to get out, but they can't.
(09:47):
Is that just the nameof the Cowboys brand?
I don't know how you can turn the tableson someone who's been wielding so much
power in this unhealthy relationship.
I'm wondering, you know, stopgoing to games, stop buying
jerseys, give the cold shoulder.
Is there a better way of trying totalk and work through issues together?
(10:09):
You watch the games and youlower the bar a little bit.
I just How do you provide some selfcare when maybe you're not getting
that from, from your partner?
And this is the case, the Dallas Cowboys.
Yeah.
Well, number one, our selfcare is our responsibility.
Our happiness is our responsibility.
So I had to learn that.
(10:30):
That was a hard lesson for me tolearn in my, in my own relationship
that, that my partner wasn't goingto be the one to make me happy.
He could add to it for sure.
But if I was miserable,I was choosing that.
And so, so yeah, I don't know ifthere's, I mean, like you got to
take care of number one first.
And I don't mean that in a selfish way.
(10:52):
I mean that in a make, make sureyou're, make sure you're good.
Right.
And I don't think any of these fans aregonna, you know, do anything crazy when
their team isn't doing so hot, but Idon't think they're going anywhere either.
I think they're really.
Just dedicated.
And I think it's part of that culturetoo, that Texas pride, like, and
I'm not even from Texas and, and Iwas just telling Alex earlier, like
(11:14):
I'm a fan because growing up, myfamily were just literal Cowboys.
They were farmers, they were ranchers,they had cattle, they rode horses.
And so they just gravitatedtowards the team.
And so, you know, I just followed alongand, and that's how I became a fan in
my younger years of the Dallas Cowboys.
I'm gonna, I'm just a littlefull of transparency here.
(11:35):
So I grew up in Miami andeveryone in my family, they are
diehard Miami Dolphins fans.
And as I was growing up, this iskind of when I felt as though I
was coming into my own as a man.
I separated from the family.
Why?
Because I got sick and tiredof watching the Dolphins lose.
They start off 8 0, they play ateam in Buffalo and Jim Kelly,
(11:58):
then all of a sudden they tank.
And I'm like, no, I'm sick and tired ofdoing this to myself every single year.
I'm going to high school pissed offbecause the Dolphins lost on Sunday.
I was like, you know what?
It's time for a divorce.
And right then in high school,I divorced the Miami Dolphins.
They're not going to do it to me.
So the Cowboys fans, they do have choices.
(12:19):
There's 31 other teams that they canroot for, or you can say, you know what?
I'm not going to root for a team.
I'm just going to root foran individual on a team.
I mean, it's okay to divorce your team.
And listen, I'm all for people formingrelationships and stay together.
But if you're in a toxic relationship,at some point, like you said, I mean,
(12:42):
you got to be a little selfish and thinkabout self care and divorce that team.
That's what the D inDallas stand for divorce.
Well, it's, that's hard to do when, uh,it's tied to your occupation, right?
When they introduced the, uh, the, uh,the, the Dallas podcasters, I don't
think any of us could ever not root forthat team because that's what we do.
(13:05):
Um, but I think that is a, likesuch a, uh, fascinating, um, way
to identify with a certain team.
Um, and the way that they playmaybe reflects the hard work and
blue collar nature, um, that aliteral cowboy would be doing.
So of all the stories, Nick, where youhear a woman come to you and tells you why
(13:25):
they're a fan of your play or football ingeneral, uh, where, where does that rank?
That you are a cowboy,you're a cowboy fan.
Well, I'm going to push thisoff on the media, right?
I know that sounds, youknow, right up the alley.
Oh, I just blame the media.
They're the culprits for everything.
But it is true.
(13:46):
Growing up in Miami, I knew individualswho became Dallas Cowboys fans.
Why?
Because that's all they saw on television.
And oh, by the way, the taglinewas, America's team and everyone
wants to be patriotic, right?
I mean, you see me wearing kindof red, white, and blue now.
So kids wanted to be patriotic,the star on the helmet, you
(14:07):
know, Tom Landry, right?
All those guys, Emmitt Smith, Troy Aikman.
So they became Dallas Cowboys fan.
And this is why it's a little difficultfor the Cowboys fans to break away
from it because it's the brand.
You buy into a brand.
This is why fandom is so real.
This is why fans cheer.
This is why they buy the jerseys.
(14:27):
Even when teams suck, they still go tothe games because fandom is a real thing.
And that brand isembedded in them because.
It happens to us early on.
You're four years old, your dad sitsyou in front of the television, you're
watching the game, and then you'recozying up to him, and it's so nostalgic.
So when you grow up, you wantthat same feel with your kids,
(14:50):
so you do the same thing to them.
Hopefully, you're rooting for a winningteam and not a team that have been
known to cheat like the Patriots.
I mean, that's something I heard.
I don't know how true it is,but that's something I heard.
Nick, it's a good reminder for Brenda.
And for any of the other Ride theWave, uh, media listeners that
(15:11):
have not found our Apple TV rewatchseries of the Patriots Dynasty,
We, we talk about all of it.
So, by no means, Nick, do you needto be digging up skeletons here and
talking about things that I thoughtwere properly addressed, uh, which
you could find right here on thepodcasts or, uh, YouTube feeds.
Some of our earlierepisodes here on those guys.
(15:31):
Uh, and Nick, you mentioned aboutthat brand and, uh, Brenda, I thought
this was fascinating because anotherway to access the Dallas Cowboys
has nothing to do with football.
And it was actually a conversation Ihad with my wife because she watched
on Netflix, America's Sweetheartsabout the Dallas Cowboys cheerleaders.
Then being an extension of thestar on the side of the helmet.
(15:54):
Um, so I know Brenda, like watching, uh,professional cheerleaders kind of in that
make and mold of the Dallas Cowboys image.
Is that something that, you know,as a relationship coach, was that
something that you saw that lookedhealthy on the outside or kind of the
approach to that work and life balance?
(16:18):
Oh, I'm not sure if Iunderstand the question, Alex.
I just, when you're watchingit, it doesn't seem real.
It's people there to do a job,but they really are just the
face of the Dallas Cowboys.
I was curious, kind of, what you saw.
Um, you know, from that Netflixseries Yeah, we talked about that.
(16:43):
And I think it goes to Nick'spoint, like, this is a machine,
this is a, this is a product.
Right.
And, and they've pushed itfor a long time, and I think
they've done a really good job.
And, and again, like calling thosecheerleaders, America's sweethearts,
they're not just, you know,the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders,
they're America's cheerleaders.
Um, watching that series is.
(17:05):
It's eyeopening, but one thingthat I re really saw in that was
that they are creating a product.
And if you don't fit that productfor whatever reason, it could be,
you know, nothing to do with whoyou are or how talented you are.
If you don't fit the product, you're notgonna be one of America's sweethearts
and there's not a thing you can doabout it because they do have such
(17:27):
strong branding and such a strong.
You know, historical media presence,as Nick was saying, and they've, you
know, they've, they've carried it onand they've, and they've continued
to build on that, uh, off of that.
So I'll say this, Alex, really quickly,because when you think about the Dallas
Cowboys and so many other teams, and it's,it's interesting that we're talking about
(17:52):
the Dallas Cowboys because it is one ofthe most, I guess, recognizable teams.
and professional sports.
I think right now they may, I think JerryJones, I think they what, rank number
one in NFL as far as the franchise value.
They may be, it was seven, ninebillion or something like that.
(18:14):
Too many zeros.
Yeah, it's too many zeros to count,but it goes back to, okay, what is
a fan's relationship with a team?
Everyone wants to beassociated with a winner.
You mentioned that theteam hasn't been relevant.
Since 1995, almost 30years, that's a long time.
(18:34):
I mean, while you're going to have a groupof fans continue to cheer for the Dallas
Cowboys, because once again, they'reassociated with nostalgia, with their
grandfather, their father, whomever.
But it does come a point where youstart to look around and notice
that you're kind of all alone atthe bottom with the New York Giants.
(18:56):
And you don't want to be there.
So what other options do you have?
And I just go back towhat Brenda said earlier.
I mean, self care is so, soimportant, but you got to start
thinking about you, because I knowI'm not the only person when I was
rooting for a particular person.
Uh, organization that went toschool to work angry that next day
(19:19):
because they didn't perform well.
I'm like, wait a minute.
I mean, I'm a fan, but I didn't play.
They, they're not paying me.
So why the hell I'm upset.
So that's where the DallasCowboys fans need to be.
Celebrate the fact that CeeDeeLamb signed a massive contract.
Hope that you can keep the group together.
But at some point you got tomake some tough decisions.
(19:39):
How long do you want to continueto put yourself through this
emotional rollercoaster?
And that's what the Dallas Cowboys alwayswill be an emotional rollercoaster.
You have so many high highs and lowlows with playoff disappointments
year after year, 29 going on 30 years.
He's Nick Ferguson.
(19:59):
I'm Alex Hardy and joinedagain, Brenna Cordolfo.
You can find her on theRestored Wife podcast.
She is a Laura Boyle certifiedrelationship coach and day by day,
We're getting better at managingour relationships as NFL fans with
our teams, some of whom deliver, uh,those like the Dallas Cowboys, it's.
It's been a long time.
(20:21):
Uh, the last, uh, item that wehave here for those guys, typically
this is Nick before we split,because Brenda, you are our guest.
Brenda, before we split, uh, in anyway you'd like to connect with our
audience, um, anything you'd want topromote for Restored Wife or anything
you have going on right now, uh,within Daybreak or Ride the Wave
Media before we get on out of here.
(20:42):
Sure.
Thank you so much.
And thank you so much for having me.
This has been a blast.
Um, I just, I'm leaving with thisquestion of like, what are we not seeing?
Like what is underneaththe surface of this team?
What, what, what is still therethat was there in the past?
Um, that maybe even theorganization has forgot about.
So that's the question thatI'm leaving with here today.
And, um, as far as what I'mdoing, I am putting on a workshop.
(21:06):
It's called the EmpoweredWife Workshop and I help women
become ridiculously happy wives.
No matter their circumstances.
And I would love to, I would love toconnect with whoever is just either in a
really tough spot in their relationship orthings are pretty good and they just want
them to be like the best that they can be.
So you can find me at The RestoredWife Podcast and also on social
(21:29):
media at Brenda Kurdolfer and TheRestored Wife Podcast on Instagram.
She's Brenda Kurdolfer.
Nick, anything to say to the peoplebefore we head on out of here?
Yeah, just because you are from aregion or area of the United States
doesn't necessarily mean that youhave to continue with the family
(21:50):
tradition of rooting for a loser.
I, too, was in that program,but I got myself out.
You can, too, as well.
I'm Nick Ferguson and I have aproblem, but I don't have one anymore.
No, I don't, and I approve this message.
Thanks, everyone.
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