November 21, 2024 • 36 mins
What if the key to healing is understanding the complex tapestry of parts within us? Join us on Trauma Talks as we sit down with Brinn Langdale, an expert in Internal Family Systems (IFS) and a licensed therapist, who shares her journey from chaos to clarity. Through the lens of IFS, Brinn reveals how the inner critic and inner child, often seen as obstacles, are essential protectors in our psyche. By acknowledging these parts, we can reframe our past experiences and embrace self-compassion, guiding us toward healing and personal growth.
This episode highlights the "wholistic" approach to coaching, where mental and physical health are intertwined. We introduce the concept of MEDS—mindfulness, meditation, exercise, diet, and sleep—as vital components of well-being alongside the often-overlooked impact of gut health. Brinn and I also delve into the power of forgiveness in overcoming childhood trauma, sharing personal stories and insights from her coaching package, "The Whole You Activation," Available at brinnlangdale.com, which includes innovative techniques like EFT tapping and music therapy.
Wrapping up our conversation, we explore the polyvagal theory and its potential for fostering peace and relaxation. Brinn offers practical exercises and shares resources for listeners eager to embark on their healing journey. With personal stories and expert advice, this episode is a treasure trove of therapeutic insights and tools designed to empower listeners to trust their instincts and find their path to recovery. Tune in for a thought-provoking discussion that promises to resonate long after the episode ends.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
Hi, welcome to Trauma Talks with Russ Tellop.
I am Russ Tellop.
I'm your host.
I am a trauma-informed somaticcoach with MindBodySpirit and
BrainSpottingCS, which is basedin Colorado Springs.
Today we are interviewing BrynLangdale.
Bryn is a therapist and coachthat does work primarily in
parts work.
(00:21):
She's going to talk a littlebit about IFS and what parts
work is, what that looks likeand the types of healing that
you might expect from parts work.
We're going to talk a littlebit about her history and some
of the things that she's gonethrough that led her to this
type of work, and then some ofmy history and what led me to
this type of work as well.
So enjoy and we'll talk to youguys afterwards.
(00:42):
Thank you, Hi there, my name isRuss.
I'm a trauma-informed somaticlife coach with MindBodySpirit
LLC and BrainSpot in ColoradoSprings, and I've got a guest
with me today, Bryn Langdale.
(01:03):
Bryn, could you give us just aquick rundown of kind of where
you're coming from and whereyou're going?
Speaker 2 (01:10):
Yeah, absolutely, thank you.
Thank you for having me, russ.
So yes, I am a licensedtherapist and before that I was
a coach and I specialize inparts work.
So I help people identify andwork with their inner child,
their inner critic, and reallystrengthen that adult self,
(01:33):
because we need that strongadult self to then soothe the
inner child or befriend theinner critic.
So that's kind of the lens inwhich I work, and the reason
that I do this type of work isbecause this is the work that I
started doing 15 years ago whenI was 22.
And that's when I did a deepdive into my own healing journey
(01:57):
.
Yeah, yeah, basically I dealtwith a lot of trauma growing up.
It was almost like I had twodifferent lives almost.
On one hand, I came from a veryloving and supportive family.
We gave hugs and kisses andsaid I love you.
(02:19):
On the other hand, like behindclosed doors, it was very
chaotic and traumatizing.
There was a lot of physical,emotional and even sexual abuse
within the house, and so thatwas something I dealt with my
entire childhood.
Okay, and really just kind ofsuppressed it for a while.
Speaker 1 (02:41):
Right, and then you started.
So you started your journeyaround 22 years old, and how old
are you now?
How long has that been?
Speaker 2 (02:47):
I am 37.
Speaker 1 (02:48):
Okay, awesome.
Speaker 2 (02:49):
Yeah, yeah.
So when I was 18, everythingkind of came to a head.
It came out about the sexualabuse that was going on, had
happened between me and asibling, which is something that
is extremely common but isactually not really talked about
and is pretty taboo to talkabout, and at the time none of
(03:12):
my family had ever heard of it.
We tried to go find resources.
There weren't any available.
Luckily, now that's shifting alittle bit, and that's one of
the reasons I'm publishing amemoir is so we can have a
little bit more discussionaround such a prevalent issue in
our society.
But yeah, so that all happened.
(03:33):
And then, you know, I was actingout in all sorts of ways.
You know I was drinking,getting blackout, drunk, smoking
constant.
I've been smoking since I was,you know, nine years old.
Nine years old, very, very muchrisky, risk behavior, so
hurting myself, and eatingdisorders, and struggled with a
(03:54):
lot of stuff.
And so by the time college hitand it all kind of came to a
head and I had a boyfriend atthe time who I'd been together
with for a while and hebasically sat me down and was
like, hey, unless some thingschange, I can't do this anymore.
And that's what really got meon my healing journey.
So I'm really grateful that hehad the courage to tell me that.
(04:17):
And then I'm also reallygrateful that I had the courage
to listen, because I could haveeasily blown him off and said,
well, screw you, I'll go findsomebody else.
Speaker 1 (04:25):
In fact, that probably would have been more in
line with what you wouldnormally do, right?
Speaker 2 (04:31):
Yeah, yeah it was, but there was.
You know, I had a respect forhim and I knew what I was doing.
I could kind of see, and itwasn't just him, it was
affecting all of myrelationships.
So I had enough awareness to belike, all right, let's change
some things.
So I enrolled in an eight-dayleadership program and this
leadership program completelychanged my life and you know
(04:54):
people say that, but like itliterally changed my life
because it got me on like such adifferent trajectory and it got
me understanding about my innerchild, my, you know, these
different parts of myself, howto soothe them.
It got me also understandingwhat happens to the brain when
you know trauma happens.
What happens to the body.
(05:15):
It introduced coping skills,helped me identify my feelings
and how to communicate and itreally shifted a lot.
And then I kept with it.
And that was the big key is itwasn't just this like, oh, I'm
going to go to this retreat andit's like a one and done, or you
know, oh, I feel good now.
I kept at it for years andyears and years and years and
(05:37):
it's actually a program that I'ma part of the leadership team
on now, and something that yeah,so I like to give back and it's
a totally voluntary position.
Um, everybody involved is avolunteer.
Speaker 1 (05:51):
So what is the name of this program?
Speaker 2 (05:53):
It's called the authentic leadership center and
it is in Sacramento, California.
Speaker 1 (06:00):
And is it something that people can do remotely, if
they were interested in tryingit out?
Speaker 2 (06:04):
And is it something that people can do remotely, if
they were interested in tryingit out.
Actually, you can attend, likesome of their weekly support
groups, but the actual trainingitself is an in-person training.
Speaker 1 (06:15):
Okay, cool.
Speaker 2 (06:17):
Yeah, so that's how I became a coach is I started
working with them and coachingwith them and, you know,
studying under my mentor there,who's a psychologist, and and
that's where I really, uh,learned a lot about these
different parts of ourselves.
Speaker 1 (06:33):
Yeah, so bringing up parts work that's that's what
you specialize in is IFS,internal family systems and
parts work um inner childhealing, that type of thing.
Can you just give us a highlevel run through of what that
looks like and why you chosethat path?
Speaker 2 (06:49):
Yeah.
So basically, it's this ideathat we all have these different
parts of ourselves.
Right, there's a part of youthat wants to eat that third
slice of chocolate cake and thepart of you that thinks like,
hey, maybe that's not the bestidea for me.
The part of you that wants togo to the gym and the part of
you that's like, no, I'm goingto sit here and watch TV.
Right, the part of you thatwants to quit your job.
The part of you that doesn't.
(07:09):
Right, we all have thesedifferent parts of ourselves and
parts.
Work is basically an umbrellaterm for any sort of coaching or
therapy, where you get to knowthese parts as if they are their
own personalities.
So, for example, I talk aboutthe inner critic a lot.
So the inner critic is thispart of me that is all of my.
(07:32):
You know judgmental thoughts,my, you know the judgment, the
harsh, the mean, the pushy, the.
You know the part of me that'stelling me I'm not good enough,
I'm not smart enough, I can't doanything right, I'm not
creative, anything like that,and so that's what I consider
(07:52):
the inner critic, and it's sortof this like shaming, like wag
your finger, like hey, be better, you should do better.
I'm going to tough, love youinto being better.
I'm gonna be that drillsergeant who's gonna break you
down so you can build up.
Because the bottom line is thatpart of ourselves is actually
(08:13):
trying to protect us and, andthe metaphor I use for that is
imagine you're walking down thestreet with a little kid and
that little kid runs out intothe middle of the street.
You might react by saying whyare you running down the street?
Don't you ever want to ask me?
Ever again.
Oh my gosh, you're soundingpretty critical, you're sounding
(08:35):
pretty mean, you're soundingpretty judgmental and harsh.
But really, what's going onunderneath that?
Like, what's the emotion that'scoming on underneath that?
Like what's the emotion that'scoming up underneath that is,
you're scared.
You're scared that somethingbad is going to happen.
Speaker 1 (08:53):
Yeah, that's one of the biggest parts of IFS that
I've fallen in love with is nomatter what that part is doing
and no matter how that might bedetrimental or not serve you.
Now its main focus is positive.
Its main focus is to help you.
Its main focus is to protectyou, and it's doing the best job
it knows how.
Speaker 2 (09:15):
Absolutely 100%.
And the same thing can then beapplied to the inner child, can
then be applied to the innerchild.
So say that child that ran outinto the middle of the street,
say that kid, they just gotyelled at right and screamed at
and, depending on how harsh likeif you had a really, really
(09:35):
harsh parent it might not havejust been screaming, they
might've been hitting you orbeating you or you know doing
something like that.
And so what happens?
If this kid is so scared ofthat punishment it doesn't even
(09:56):
want to cross the street whenit's looked both ways.
But what if you know,eventually, going away, you know
, to college is across thestreet, or getting that dream
job is across the street, orasking out your crush is across
the street, right, right, thischild is trying to protect
(10:18):
itself by not getting yelled ator not getting beat by this you
know harsh parent, or the criticin this case and they're trying
to protect themselves by notcrossing that street.
And so that's kind of what I'msaying, that that's another way
of saying like we're all tryingto protect ourselves, we all
have the kind of these ways thatwe limit ourselves.
Oh, I'm not going to go afterthis or I'm not going to push
(10:39):
myself on that.
Well, are you protectingyourself from failing?
Are you protecting yourselffrom what you think might be
looking like an idiot, or you'reyou know you're trying to
protect yourself from beingembarrassed or disappointed, or
or you know being let down,right?
So there's all these ways thatthe, that the inner child, is
also trying to protect ourselvesby often keeping us small and
(11:03):
limited.
Speaker 1 (11:04):
Gotcha, do you do any work with like exile wounds and
that type of thing as well?
Speaker 2 (11:09):
So that's kind of using some of the language from
IFS.
I personally like to keep itsimple.
I think that the wounded innerchild is our exiled wound, but
sometimes those languages can bereally hard to digest.
I like to keep it simple.
(11:32):
I think of ourselves as we, youknow, we got the scared younger
part that we try to pretenddoesn't exist and we have this
really mean inner part that isprobably we like to pretend
isn't as mean as it actually isinside our heads.
And then we have our adult, andour adult is the logical,
(11:55):
mature, rational part ofourselves, the one that can zoom
out and see the bigger pictureand kind of hold the goals and
is in charge of how you want towalk in the world.
And oftentimes the critic andthe inner child are so strong
(12:16):
that whatever they want wins andthe adult kind of gets pushed
aside.
So what I try to help peoplewith is really strengthening
that adult self, to be like okay, what does your adult
ultimately want?
Okay, you might not feel likeyou know, quitting, quitting
your job and and going forsomething else, but does this
(12:39):
align with what your adult wants?
Does this align with yourvalues?
Does it align with your, yourcore values and your morals and
your ethics and all of thatright like how do you actually
want to be in the world?
And the adult can do the hardthing and get through it,
whereas the kid or the criticlike they might not want to do
that hard thing.
Or the critic is like houndingyou, like why didn't you apply
(13:02):
for jobs, why didn't you quityour job?
But you're staying stuck for areason.
You're staying stuck becausethat kid is afraid to quit the
job.
Or you're staying stuck becauseit's you know you don't want to
fail or you don't want to, youknow, not achieve your dream,
right, so it all makes perfectsense.
And so that is one of thereasons you asked like why did I
want to go down this path?
Is one of it is because ithelps everything you do make
(13:27):
absolute perfect sense.
Like we all like I felt like Iwas crazy for most of my life.
I was like straight up.
I was like why am I doing this?
Why am I acting this way?
Why am I hurting somebody Ilove?
Why am I exploding?
Why am I doing this?
And I just thought I was crazy.
Speaker 1 (13:45):
But then, once I started to see that there were
all these different parts of methat were making total sense,
based off of everything thatthey had experienced in Denver
in life, yeah, I've done alittle bit of parts work myself,
and the thing that I found sopowerful about it is, once you
acknowledge the part exists,thank the part for everything
(14:09):
that it's done up until thispoint to keep you safe, and then
just let it know, hey, I've gotit from here, it's done up
until this point to keep yousafe, and then just let it know,
hey, I've got it from here, andit just seems to just dissolve
away.
I mean, part's still there andit'll still flare up
occasionally, but it just seemsto to give its power away, you
know.
Speaker 2 (14:26):
Absolutely.
Yeah.
One of my favorite like toolsor lines that I use is it's not
your job anymore, right, it's nolonger that kid's job.
Our inner child thinks thatthey're in charge.
They're the one that's supposedto go to work, they're the one
that's supposed to be married,they're the one that's supposed
to be in the relationship.
They're the one who's supposedto make the money and do the
(14:48):
hard things.
No, it's not.
It's not your job to do that.
It's the adult's job to do allof that, and that alone can be a
huge shift for people.
Like you said.
Thank you for trying yourhardest to make it happen, but
we don't want a six-year-oldgoing to work or driving a car
(15:13):
or being in a relationship orparenting kids right, we don't
want the five year old to dothat.
We want the adult to do that.
Speaker 1 (15:21):
So for those who are not familiar with parts work or
just tuning in and just tryingto figure out what we're talking
about, can you go through kindof quickly, just over high level
, what parts work therapy lookslike and kind of how it works?
Speaker 2 (15:38):
Yeah, I mean, I think a big part of it is identifying
these parts, and so what I willdo is I will actually do what I
call parts work interview.
So I will ask, like for you,for example, russ, if I may.
Um, I would say, okay, russ,I'm gonna ask, I'm gonna ask
(16:00):
russ, the adult, to kind of stepforward and I'm gonna ask the
critic to step, or I'm gonna askthe adult to step back and ask
the critic to step forward.
Okay so, and then I would giveyou a moment to like kind of
center yourself.
And you know you would comeforward with, like the critic
Okay, so let's get in touch withthe part that's that's really
(16:21):
judgmental and harsh, the partthat's measuring how good enough
or not good enough you're doing, and things like that.
And then I would ask a series ofquestions, and some of it would
be like okay, well, what do youthink about Russ?
Like, can you tell me what youthink about Russ?
And like, how do you think Russis doing?
(16:41):
And then we hear everything thecritic has to say.
And then it would be somethinglike okay, well, what do you
ultimately want for Russ?
And then we hear the critic'sgoals, and usually those goals
are actually pretty helpful,like oh, I actually want russ to
(17:02):
, you know, succeed I want, Iwant russ to help people, I want
, I want russ to be in connected, healthy relationships, you
know.
But but the way the critictries to go about doing that
might be a littlecounterintuitive, but the
ultimate goal is they want goodthings, kind of like going back
(17:24):
to that protector.
Speaker 1 (17:25):
Yeah, interesting.
Um, so you're also a holisticcoach.
Can you tell me what that's,what that's all about?
Speaker 2 (17:34):
Yeah.
So I consider myself a holisticcoach and when I talk about
holistic I think of the wholeself.
So I actually spell holisticwith a W, as in the whole person
.
So the reason I do that it kindof goes back to parts work.
We want to look at the wholeperson.
We're not getting rid of any ofthese parts.
We don't kick them off theisland.
(17:54):
We're not saying hey, get outof here.
We don't want to say like, okay, I don't like you critic, or
hey, kid, get out of here.
We don't do that.
It's all about the whole self.
Now, in addition to that, we'renot just our emotions and our
thoughts, we have a physicalbody, right.
So I use an acronym called MEDS, and MEDS stands for
(18:17):
mindfulness, meditation,exercise, diet, sleep, and then
I tack on a few other S's likescreen time, spirituality,
support and sexuality, becausethese are all areas of life that
are impacting us now and ourmental health.
(18:38):
So if you go through that listand figure out, okay, what are
my exercise habits and how can Itweak them to improve my mental
and physical health, okay, whatabout you know that goes along
with diet and, I believe, ourgut health?
A lot of people aren't aware,but there's a ton of emerging
information about gut healththese days.
Speaker 1 (18:59):
Yeah, that cyclical feedback makes a huge difference
when you're working on healing.
Speaker 2 (19:04):
Absolutely, and they're calling the gut the
second brain, and that's because90 to 95% of our serotonin is
produced in our gut and at least50% of our dopamine is produced
in our gut.
So a lot of times people arelike, oh, I need to take this
(19:24):
antidepressant or whatever it isto help the chemical imbalance
in my brain.
But really there's a chemicalimbalance in your gut and that's
where we need to be focusing alot of that attention in our
energy is because, if you canclear up, a lot of people have
gut infections that they're noteven aware of.
They think that things are justkind of normal.
(19:47):
It's normal to have bloating orirregular bowels or whatever it
is.
But really if you clear upwhat's going on your gut, it has
a huge impact on your mentalhealth.
So a lot of people are like, oh, I'll just eat vegetables and
make sure I get my protein, butunless you have the gut flora
(20:08):
and the healthy gut bacteria todigest those things, then just
eating healthy is actually notgoing to be enough.
But if you get that cleared up,then when you eat healthy, then
you're actually supportingyourself.
Speaker 1 (20:21):
So are you working with them on just general health
then, as well, as well as thetrauma healing that you're doing
with them?
Speaker 2 (20:29):
Yeah, I think I believe you know they go hand in
hand and so, yes, we can workon skills and we can work on,
you know, these different parts.
And also your mental health istotally linked to your physical
health as well, so we can kindof play off each other in that
(20:49):
way.
So let's do some tweaks to thephysical health that will
improve the mental health andlet's do some of the mental
health to then be able to get tosome of the physical health too
.
Speaker 1 (20:59):
Yeah, and I think, like you said, they're so tied
together that even just workingon the mental health piece ends
up helping the physical healthas well.
I started my journey about twoyears ago with some RTT and
immediately I noticed that Istarted losing weight, and I
wasn't doing anything to loseweight, it just started falling
off.
I lost about 70 pounds in thecourse of a year while doing all
these different modalitiestrying to heal my mind, which in
(21:23):
turn started healing everythingelse as well.
Speaker 2 (21:25):
Yeah, absolutely.
What's RTT?
A few different things.
For those people that areinterested in all the good
freebies that are out there, Ihave a couple of different free
options.
One I have a blog that I sendout every two weeks.
I also have a 30 episodepodcast that is calledistic
(21:47):
Approach to Healing and itinterviews 30 different holistic
healers.
So if you're just kind ofstarting out or if you want to
find other modalities to yourhealing journey, that's a really
good resource.
I love resources, so I justconstantly am providing them.
The other resource that I havethat's chock full of resources
(22:08):
is a travel guide to yourhealing journey.
Oh, cool.
Speaker 1 (22:11):
What is the travel guide all about?
Speaker 2 (22:13):
Yeah, so that's really fun.
So I love to travel.
I actually just finished up ayear living in a van doing van
life all over the country.
So I'm a therapist and I loveto travel.
So I made a travel guide toyour healing journey and
basically it's laid out justlike a travel guide.
It gives you what to pack, likewhat to bring, what to leave
behind.
It talks about differentsightseeing stops you'll see
(22:35):
along the way.
It talks about cautions on theroad and it basically just kind
of lays out what you can expecton a healing journey.
It also gives you lots ofresources like podcasts to
listen to, books, to read people, to follow different things
(22:55):
like that.
So I love that resource.
That one's super fun.
I also have a monthly workshopseries that I do all about parts
work.
So that workshop series is onthe third Thursday of every
month and is free to anybody.
Um, and especially if anybody'son here listening and you work
(23:16):
with clients, it's great forpeople who work with clients and
it's great for people who arealso looking for their, their
own healing too and um, so, forexample, I do, like you know,
befriend your inner critic isone.
Soothe your inner child,strengthen your adult, hear your
inner teenager.
You know things like that, so Ido that once a month as well,
(23:36):
and then you would also findinformation about my speaking
events that I do and how to getin touch with me for individual
sessions.
Speaker 1 (23:46):
Okay, awesome.
And then do you, do yoursessions remotely.
Speaker 2 (23:51):
Yeah, everything is remote.
I do travel for speaking events.
I'm going to Washington DC tospeak at a conference.
I was just in California anddid a couple speaking events,
but yeah, everything is remote.
Speaker 1 (24:05):
Okay, cool, let's see what else can we chat about
here.
You said you were working on abook.
Speaker 2 (24:12):
Yes.
Speaker 1 (24:13):
What is that about?
Speaker 2 (24:14):
I am working on a book and it is my memoir.
A lot of people say I'm tooyoung to write a memoir, but a
lot happened in my first 30years of life, so that's what
it's about.
It's about the first 30 yearsof my.
So that's what it's about.
It's about the first 30 yearsof my life and kind of talks
walks through.
You know what it looked like onthe outside when I was dealing
with childhood trauma, a lot ofthe things that I was working
(24:36):
with and dealing with and thenhealing and forgiveness.
So I found forgiveness for myabuser about a month before my
30th birthday.
It was my goal.
I dedicated my 29th year toforgiveness and I found it has
been a game changer.
You know, I feel like I wasreally able to take my power
(25:10):
back and not be so controlled bysomebody else.
And somebody else who wasn'treally even in my life is in my
life and I'm able to talk tothem and um have compassion and
understanding for them and uh,and also have compassion and
(25:30):
understanding for myself and formy little girl and my inner
child and what she had toexperience and went through, and
I get to protect her now withboundaries and um.
You know, we don't really goback into that space anymore.
Speaker 1 (25:46):
She doesn't have that emotional charge that she used
to carry I imagine her lettinggo, something that painful was,
was a huge turn in your life it.
Speaker 2 (25:55):
Yes, it was massive, it was.
It was really like a lightswitch.
It was all of a sudden.
Once that moment hit, it waslike a massive weight was lifted
off my shoulders and I could.
It was almost like I could seeclearly again, or not even again
, for the first time in my life,and and that was that was
(26:16):
really significant to do- yeah,I can imagine.
Speaker 1 (26:20):
I had a similar experience as a kid and just
recently, in the last six monthsor so, had the opportunity to
confront that person and andheal from it, and we both
actually had a pretty powerfulhealing experience or letting go
of all that pain and guilt Wow.
Speaker 2 (26:40):
So, yeah, wow, that's huge.
Speaker 1 (26:47):
Yeah, wow, that's huge, yeah.
So if somebody was interestedin working with you, what, what,
what should they expect as faras the amount of time that they
would be working with you?
What, what sessions look like?
That sort of thing.
Speaker 2 (26:57):
Yeah.
So I offer a coaching packagethat is called the the whole
activation, the whole youactivation.
And that's where we go in andwe do these different interviews
.
We interview the inner critic,the inner child and the adult,
and we do an inner integrationsession and those are 90 minute
(27:18):
sessions and and that's kind ofa great place to start right
You're getting in touch withthese different parts, you're
getting to know them, you getjournaling exercises, you get um
different reflection pieces,and so that's a really great
package to start with, and thenfrom there we can incorporate
other things.
But I also use um music therapyto calm the nervous system.
(27:43):
That is a really huge.
I work with the polyvagaltheory and I work with basically
listening to certain filteredmusic that will help shift your
nervous system into a moreregulated state on a regular
basis.
So it's more than just like, oh, listen to this music when
(28:04):
you're triggered and you feelbetter's, like no, this gives
you long lasting impacts.
Okay, um, so that's, that'sreally cool.
I also do tapping, um, so eft,and for people who aren't
familiar with what tapping is,it's kind of like acupuncture,
but instead of putting needlesinto different energy points,
(28:26):
you physically tap on the bodyat different energy points, and
it is an amazing tool forreleasing old, stuck emotions,
traumas and negative corebeliefs.
Speaker 1 (28:38):
And is the EFT tapping?
Is that something that you'redoing specifically with the
client, or are you giving themexercises that they can do at
home?
Speaker 2 (28:45):
specifically with the client or are you giving them
exercises that they can do athome?
I specifically do that throughand then those are also 90
minute sessions and then I alsohave just regular 50 minute
sessions as well.
But if you're somebody who'sreally interested in kind of
hitting the ground running andyou're ready to have some
transformational work, I suggestyou know the longer sessions
(29:06):
can can really make some shiftsin a shorter amount of time.
Speaker 1 (29:11):
Cool, and you also mentioned that you do some work
in polyvagal theory.
Yes, could you give us anexercise that we could work on
as we close out and and do somevagal toning?
Speaker 2 (29:24):
Well, are you referring to like audio audible
vagal toning?
Uh, well, are you referring tolike audio audible vagal toning?
Speaker 1 (29:29):
It could be audible vagal toning, it could be
bilateral tapping, whatever.
Whatever you wanted to share.
Speaker 2 (29:37):
Okay, well, one of my , one of my favorites, is just
kind of to like notice the shiftis very subtle.
Um, so, when you're working withpolyvagal basically, the vagal
nerve is the nerve that runsfrom the top of your spine down
your whole body and radiatesthroughout your whole body, and
it is one of the maincontrollers of, like, your
(29:58):
nervous system and so whenyou're working with it, it's
very subtle.
And so, for example, I'm goingto invite you to go ahead and
slowly look around the room andidentify something that brings
(30:21):
you peace.
So it could be a color, itcould be a picture, it could be
something that brings you peace.
So it could be a color, itcould be a picture, it could be
something that brings you peace.
And once you find it, keep yourattention there.
And the reason we say slowlylook around the room is because
(30:44):
if you frantically look aroundthe room or quickly look around
the room, it will heighten yournervous system.
So the idea here is you want toslowly, gently, look around the
room, find something thatbrings you peace, a color, a
picture, something that bringsup a peaceful memory, whatever
it is, and then focus on it, andjust sit there and focus on it
(31:13):
and then, once you're doing this, if you feel any sort of shift
into relaxation or peace, thenfocus on that feeling of
relaxation and peace and reallymarinate in that feeling and
really marinate in that feeling.
Speaker 1 (31:36):
Yeah, I can definitely feel a softening in
my chest.
Speaker 2 (31:39):
There you go, and then you would want to really
marinate in the softening inyour chest and let that really
hold you.
So this is an exercise that youcan.
You know you can stay there aslong as you want, um, and it can
be really helpful when you knowit's just something short, fast
(32:04):
, you could do it anywhere.
Um, you know that you're thatyou feel safe technically, um,
feeling safe is important, um,especially to the nervous system
.
So, yeah, so that's one littleexercise that you can do.
Speaker 1 (32:16):
Okay, awesome.
Thank you for sharing that.
Is there anything else?
Speaker 2 (32:24):
you'd like to share with the audience Anything we
missed, you know?
Yeah, just the one thing.
Just for anybody listening whois either dabbling in, you know,
figuring out what their healingjourney looks like, or on their
healing journey, I just reallywant to let people know that
healing is possible.
And it can be really confusingand really frustrating because
(32:46):
we don't have the best mentalhealth system out there, but
there are resources availableand I would really encourage you
to follow your own instincts,your own intuition, your own
guidance around what could behelpful for you and really dive
(33:07):
into it.
You know we only got this onelife and so might as well make
it what you want, and I think abig part of doing that is by
doing the work and healing.
Speaker 1 (33:16):
Yeah, I'd agree.
It can be really challenging atfirst to admit that you need to
heal.
I think that a lot of us holdon to this I'm okay kind of
mentality to prevent themselvesfrom having to see where they're
not okay.
And facing the fact that you'renot okay and that you actually
(33:36):
need to do some work can bereally difficult.
But once you do it, man, it'slike a like a snowball effect.
Speaker 2 (33:43):
Absolutely Well.
I'm really excited for you that, like you're kind of in this
new, new place in life and thatmust be.
That must be really exciting.
Speaker 1 (33:52):
Yeah, you know, I went through a series of of
really traumatic relationshipsand trying to figure out what
was wrong with them Didn't doany good, you know.
So once I started realizing, Istarted listening to a to a
podcast by a person namedCaroline Strawson she's out of
the UK by a person namedCaroline Strawson.
She's out of the UK and shedoes some narcissistic abuse,
(34:16):
specialty type stuff in herpodcast but also talks a lot
about trauma.
And I have a history that'sjust chock full of trauma.
I mean, my first traumaticexperience was three days old
when my dad picked me up andspanked me because I was crying,
you know.
So it's all the way through mychildhood and then in the
military.
I had trauma in the military andthen continued trauma and
(34:36):
relationships after the military.
So by the time I realized thatI needed help, I needed it badly
.
I was in pretty bad shape andjust in the last two years it's
absolutely incredible how muchmy life has changed and how far
I've come.
And it's people like yourselfand Caroline and now me that are
helping to bring this stuff tothe forefront and it's it's
(34:58):
amazing to see.
It's amazing to see theresponse to from the general
public and how people areyearning for healing.
They really are.
We live in a sick world.
Speaker 2 (35:08):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (35:10):
Okay, uh, bren Langdale.
Thank you so much for joiningme on the podcast.
I really appreciate it.
Uh, if you guys are interestedin getting a hold of bren, she
can be reached at her websiteand that's
b-r-i-n-n-l-a-n-g-d-a-l-ecombren langdalecom, and I'll share
that in the notes as well.
She's got a specific link whereyou can get a hold of, uh, some
(35:31):
of the stuff that she'sreleasing, like workshops and
things like that.
So I'll get I'll get that inthe show notes for you guys as
well.
Thanks again, bryn, for fordoing this.
I really appreciate it, takingthe time out of your day.
Speaker 2 (35:43):
Yeah, thank you, russ .
Thanks for having me.
I really, really appreciate itas well.
Speaker 1 (35:47):
All right, we'll be in touch.
All right, guys?
Thanks so much and we'll seeyou next time.
Thanks.
Speaker 2 (35:53):
I hope you guys enjoyed this episode with Bryn.
Speaker 1 (36:00):
Bryn is brilliant when it comes to this part work
stuff and if you guys areinterested in working with Bryn,
she can be reached atBrynLangdalecom.
That'sB-R-I-N-N-L-A-N-G-D-A-L-Ecom.
If you put in forward slashlink that'll get you to the page
that has all of her programsand her freebies where you can
go in and get some informationand even some programs that she
(36:20):
offers at no cost.
Be sure to check her out.
If you guys are interested inworking with me doing brain
spotting, arts work, generalsomatic coaching, that type of
thing, I am also available forone-on-ones.
You can reach me atbrainspottingcscom.
That's brainspottingcs, likecoloradospringscom.
(36:42):
Just fill out the form thereand you'll get a little brochure
about all the differentpractices that I offer,
different modalities, as well asit'll get an email to me.
Just get an appointment withyou.
So once again, thanks forcoming by and checking out the
podcast and we'll see you nextweek.
Thank you.
Hi, welcome to Trauma Talks with Russ Tellop.
I am Russ Tellop.
I'm your host.
I am a trauma-informed somaticcoach with MindBodySpirit and
BrainSpottingCS, which is basedin Colorado Springs.
Today we are interviewing BrynLangdale.
Bryn is a therapist and coachthat does work primarily in
parts work.
(00:21):
She's going to talk a littlebit about IFS and what parts
work is, what that looks likeand the types of healing that
you might expect from parts work.
We're going to talk a littlebit about her history and some
of the things that she's gonethrough that led her to this
type of work, and then some ofmy history and what led me to
this type of work as well.
So enjoy and we'll talk to youguys afterwards.
(00:42):
Thank you, Hi there, my name isRuss.
I'm a trauma-informed somaticlife coach with MindBodySpirit
LLC and BrainSpot in ColoradoSprings, and I've got a guest
with me today, Bryn Langdale.
(01:03):
Bryn, could you give us just aquick rundown of kind of where
you're coming from and whereyou're going?
Speaker 2 (01:10):
Yeah, absolutely, thank you.
Thank you for having me, russ.
So yes, I am a licensedtherapist and before that I was
a coach and I specialize inparts work.
So I help people identify andwork with their inner child,
their inner critic, and reallystrengthen that adult self,
(01:33):
because we need that strongadult self to then soothe the
inner child or befriend theinner critic.
So that's kind of the lens inwhich I work, and the reason
that I do this type of work isbecause this is the work that I
started doing 15 years ago whenI was 22.
And that's when I did a deepdive into my own healing journey
(01:57):
.
Yeah, yeah, basically I dealtwith a lot of trauma growing up.
It was almost like I had twodifferent lives almost.
On one hand, I came from a veryloving and supportive family.
We gave hugs and kisses andsaid I love you.
(02:19):
On the other hand, like behindclosed doors, it was very
chaotic and traumatizing.
There was a lot of physical,emotional and even sexual abuse
within the house, and so thatwas something I dealt with my
entire childhood.
Okay, and really just kind ofsuppressed it for a while.
Speaker 1 (02:41):
Right, and then you started.
So you started your journeyaround 22 years old, and how old
are you now?
How long has that been?
Speaker 2 (02:47):
I am 37.
Speaker 1 (02:48):
Okay, awesome.
Speaker 2 (02:49):
Yeah, yeah.
So when I was 18, everythingkind of came to a head.
It came out about the sexualabuse that was going on, had
happened between me and asibling, which is something that
is extremely common but isactually not really talked about
and is pretty taboo to talkabout, and at the time none of
(03:12):
my family had ever heard of it.
We tried to go find resources.
There weren't any available.
Luckily, now that's shifting alittle bit, and that's one of
the reasons I'm publishing amemoir is so we can have a
little bit more discussionaround such a prevalent issue in
our society.
But yeah, so that all happened.
(03:33):
And then, you know, I was actingout in all sorts of ways.
You know I was drinking,getting blackout, drunk, smoking
constant.
I've been smoking since I was,you know, nine years old.
Nine years old, very, very muchrisky, risk behavior, so
hurting myself, and eatingdisorders, and struggled with a
(03:54):
lot of stuff.
And so by the time college hitand it all kind of came to a
head and I had a boyfriend atthe time who I'd been together
with for a while and hebasically sat me down and was
like, hey, unless some thingschange, I can't do this anymore.
And that's what really got meon my healing journey.
So I'm really grateful that hehad the courage to tell me that.
(04:17):
And then I'm also reallygrateful that I had the courage
to listen, because I could haveeasily blown him off and said,
well, screw you, I'll go findsomebody else.
Speaker 1 (04:25):
In fact, that probably would have been more in
line with what you wouldnormally do, right?
Speaker 2 (04:31):
Yeah, yeah it was, but there was.
You know, I had a respect forhim and I knew what I was doing.
I could kind of see, and itwasn't just him, it was
affecting all of myrelationships.
So I had enough awareness to belike, all right, let's change
some things.
So I enrolled in an eight-dayleadership program and this
leadership program completelychanged my life and you know
(04:54):
people say that, but like itliterally changed my life
because it got me on like such adifferent trajectory and it got
me understanding about my innerchild, my, you know, these
different parts of myself, howto soothe them.
It got me also understandingwhat happens to the brain when
you know trauma happens.
What happens to the body.
(05:15):
It introduced coping skills,helped me identify my feelings
and how to communicate and itreally shifted a lot.
And then I kept with it.
And that was the big key is itwasn't just this like, oh, I'm
going to go to this retreat andit's like a one and done, or you
know, oh, I feel good now.
I kept at it for years andyears and years and years and
(05:37):
it's actually a program that I'ma part of the leadership team
on now, and something that yeah,so I like to give back and it's
a totally voluntary position.
Um, everybody involved is avolunteer.
Speaker 1 (05:51):
So what is the name of this program?
Speaker 2 (05:53):
It's called the authentic leadership center and
it is in Sacramento, California.
Speaker 1 (06:00):
And is it something that people can do remotely, if
they were interested in tryingit out?
Speaker 2 (06:04):
And is it something that people can do remotely, if
they were interested in tryingit out.
Actually, you can attend, likesome of their weekly support
groups, but the actual trainingitself is an in-person training.
Speaker 1 (06:15):
Okay, cool.
Speaker 2 (06:17):
Yeah, so that's how I became a coach is I started
working with them and coachingwith them and, you know,
studying under my mentor there,who's a psychologist, and and
that's where I really, uh,learned a lot about these
different parts of ourselves.
Speaker 1 (06:33):
Yeah, so bringing up parts work that's that's what
you specialize in is IFS,internal family systems and
parts work um inner childhealing, that type of thing.
Can you just give us a highlevel run through of what that
looks like and why you chosethat path?
Speaker 2 (06:49):
Yeah.
So basically, it's this ideathat we all have these different
parts of ourselves.
Right, there's a part of youthat wants to eat that third
slice of chocolate cake and thepart of you that thinks like,
hey, maybe that's not the bestidea for me.
The part of you that wants togo to the gym and the part of
you that's like, no, I'm goingto sit here and watch TV.
Right, the part of you thatwants to quit your job.
The part of you that doesn't.
(07:09):
Right, we all have thesedifferent parts of ourselves and
parts.
Work is basically an umbrellaterm for any sort of coaching or
therapy, where you get to knowthese parts as if they are their
own personalities.
So, for example, I talk aboutthe inner critic a lot.
So the inner critic is thispart of me that is all of my.
(07:32):
You know judgmental thoughts,my, you know the judgment, the
harsh, the mean, the pushy, the.
You know the part of me that'stelling me I'm not good enough,
I'm not smart enough, I can't doanything right, I'm not
creative, anything like that,and so that's what I consider
(07:52):
the inner critic, and it's sortof this like shaming, like wag
your finger, like hey, be better, you should do better.
I'm going to tough, love youinto being better.
I'm gonna be that drillsergeant who's gonna break you
down so you can build up.
Because the bottom line is thatpart of ourselves is actually
(08:13):
trying to protect us and, andthe metaphor I use for that is
imagine you're walking down thestreet with a little kid and
that little kid runs out intothe middle of the street.
You might react by saying whyare you running down the street?
Don't you ever want to ask me?
Ever again.
Oh my gosh, you're soundingpretty critical, you're sounding
(08:35):
pretty mean, you're soundingpretty judgmental and harsh.
But really, what's going onunderneath that?
Like, what's the emotion that'scoming on underneath that?
Like what's the emotion that'scoming up underneath that is,
you're scared.
You're scared that somethingbad is going to happen.
Speaker 1 (08:53):
Yeah, that's one of the biggest parts of IFS that
I've fallen in love with is nomatter what that part is doing
and no matter how that might bedetrimental or not serve you.
Now its main focus is positive.
Its main focus is to help you.
Its main focus is to protectyou, and it's doing the best job
it knows how.
Speaker 2 (09:15):
Absolutely 100%.
And the same thing can then beapplied to the inner child, can
then be applied to the innerchild.
So say that child that ran outinto the middle of the street,
say that kid, they just gotyelled at right and screamed at
and, depending on how harsh likeif you had a really, really
(09:35):
harsh parent it might not havejust been screaming, they
might've been hitting you orbeating you or you know doing
something like that.
And so what happens?
If this kid is so scared ofthat punishment it doesn't even
(09:56):
want to cross the street whenit's looked both ways.
But what if you know,eventually, going away, you know
, to college is across thestreet, or getting that dream
job is across the street, orasking out your crush is across
the street, right, right, thischild is trying to protect
(10:18):
itself by not getting yelled ator not getting beat by this you
know harsh parent, or the criticin this case and they're trying
to protect themselves by notcrossing that street.
And so that's kind of what I'msaying, that that's another way
of saying like we're all tryingto protect ourselves, we all
have the kind of these ways thatwe limit ourselves.
Oh, I'm not going to go afterthis or I'm not going to push
(10:39):
myself on that.
Well, are you protectingyourself from failing?
Are you protecting yourselffrom what you think might be
looking like an idiot, or you'reyou know you're trying to
protect yourself from beingembarrassed or disappointed, or
or you know being let down,right?
So there's all these ways thatthe, that the inner child, is
also trying to protect ourselvesby often keeping us small and
(11:03):
limited.
Speaker 1 (11:04):
Gotcha, do you do any work with like exile wounds and
that type of thing as well?
Speaker 2 (11:09):
So that's kind of using some of the language from
IFS.
I personally like to keep itsimple.
I think that the wounded innerchild is our exiled wound, but
sometimes those languages can bereally hard to digest.
I like to keep it simple.
(11:32):
I think of ourselves as we, youknow, we got the scared younger
part that we try to pretenddoesn't exist and we have this
really mean inner part that isprobably we like to pretend
isn't as mean as it actually isinside our heads.
And then we have our adult, andour adult is the logical,
(11:55):
mature, rational part ofourselves, the one that can zoom
out and see the bigger pictureand kind of hold the goals and
is in charge of how you want towalk in the world.
And oftentimes the critic andthe inner child are so strong
(12:16):
that whatever they want wins andthe adult kind of gets pushed
aside.
So what I try to help peoplewith is really strengthening
that adult self, to be like okay, what does your adult
ultimately want?
Okay, you might not feel likeyou know, quitting, quitting
your job and and going forsomething else, but does this
(12:39):
align with what your adult wants?
Does this align with yourvalues?
Does it align with your, yourcore values and your morals and
your ethics and all of thatright like how do you actually
want to be in the world?
And the adult can do the hardthing and get through it,
whereas the kid or the criticlike they might not want to do
that hard thing.
Or the critic is like houndingyou, like why didn't you apply
(13:02):
for jobs, why didn't you quityour job?
But you're staying stuck for areason.
You're staying stuck becausethat kid is afraid to quit the
job.
Or you're staying stuck becauseit's you know you don't want to
fail or you don't want to, youknow, not achieve your dream,
right, so it all makes perfectsense.
And so that is one of thereasons you asked like why did I
want to go down this path?
Is one of it is because ithelps everything you do make
(13:27):
absolute perfect sense.
Like we all like I felt like Iwas crazy for most of my life.
I was like straight up.
I was like why am I doing this?
Why am I acting this way?
Why am I hurting somebody Ilove?
Why am I exploding?
Why am I doing this?
And I just thought I was crazy.
Speaker 1 (13:45):
But then, once I started to see that there were
all these different parts of methat were making total sense,
based off of everything thatthey had experienced in Denver
in life, yeah, I've done alittle bit of parts work myself,
and the thing that I found sopowerful about it is, once you
acknowledge the part exists,thank the part for everything
(14:09):
that it's done up until thispoint to keep you safe, and then
just let it know, hey, I've gotit from here, it's done up
until this point to keep yousafe, and then just let it know,
hey, I've got it from here, andit just seems to just dissolve
away.
I mean, part's still there andit'll still flare up
occasionally, but it just seemsto to give its power away, you
know.
Speaker 2 (14:26):
Absolutely.
Yeah.
One of my favorite like toolsor lines that I use is it's not
your job anymore, right, it's nolonger that kid's job.
Our inner child thinks thatthey're in charge.
They're the one that's supposedto go to work, they're the one
that's supposed to be married,they're the one that's supposed
to be in the relationship.
They're the one who's supposedto make the money and do the
(14:48):
hard things.
No, it's not.
It's not your job to do that.
It's the adult's job to do allof that, and that alone can be a
huge shift for people.
Like you said.
Thank you for trying yourhardest to make it happen, but
we don't want a six-year-oldgoing to work or driving a car
(15:13):
or being in a relationship orparenting kids right, we don't
want the five year old to dothat.
We want the adult to do that.
Speaker 1 (15:21):
So for those who are not familiar with parts work or
just tuning in and just tryingto figure out what we're talking
about, can you go through kindof quickly, just over high level
, what parts work therapy lookslike and kind of how it works?
Speaker 2 (15:38):
Yeah, I mean, I think a big part of it is identifying
these parts, and so what I willdo is I will actually do what I
call parts work interview.
So I will ask, like for you,for example, russ, if I may.
Um, I would say, okay, russ,I'm gonna ask, I'm gonna ask
(16:00):
russ, the adult, to kind of stepforward and I'm gonna ask the
critic to step, or I'm gonna askthe adult to step back and ask
the critic to step forward.
Okay so, and then I would giveyou a moment to like kind of
center yourself.
And you know you would comeforward with, like the critic
Okay, so let's get in touch withthe part that's that's really
(16:21):
judgmental and harsh, the partthat's measuring how good enough
or not good enough you're doing, and things like that.
And then I would ask a series ofquestions, and some of it would
be like okay, well, what do youthink about Russ?
Like, can you tell me what youthink about Russ?
And like, how do you think Russis doing?
(16:41):
And then we hear everything thecritic has to say.
And then it would be somethinglike okay, well, what do you
ultimately want for Russ?
And then we hear the critic'sgoals, and usually those goals
are actually pretty helpful,like oh, I actually want russ to
(17:02):
, you know, succeed I want, Iwant russ to help people, I want
, I want russ to be in connected, healthy relationships, you
know.
But but the way the critictries to go about doing that
might be a littlecounterintuitive, but the
ultimate goal is they want goodthings, kind of like going back
(17:24):
to that protector.
Speaker 1 (17:25):
Yeah, interesting.
Um, so you're also a holisticcoach.
Can you tell me what that's,what that's all about?
Speaker 2 (17:34):
Yeah.
So I consider myself a holisticcoach and when I talk about
holistic I think of the wholeself.
So I actually spell holisticwith a W, as in the whole person
.
So the reason I do that it kindof goes back to parts work.
We want to look at the wholeperson.
We're not getting rid of any ofthese parts.
We don't kick them off theisland.
(17:54):
We're not saying hey, get outof here.
We don't want to say like, okay, I don't like you critic, or
hey, kid, get out of here.
We don't do that.
It's all about the whole self.
Now, in addition to that, we'renot just our emotions and our
thoughts, we have a physicalbody, right.
So I use an acronym called MEDS, and MEDS stands for
(18:17):
mindfulness, meditation,exercise, diet, sleep, and then
I tack on a few other S's likescreen time, spirituality,
support and sexuality, becausethese are all areas of life that
are impacting us now and ourmental health.
(18:38):
So if you go through that listand figure out, okay, what are
my exercise habits and how can Itweak them to improve my mental
and physical health, okay, whatabout you know that goes along
with diet and, I believe, ourgut health?
A lot of people aren't aware,but there's a ton of emerging
information about gut healththese days.
Speaker 1 (18:59):
Yeah, that cyclical feedback makes a huge difference
when you're working on healing.
Speaker 2 (19:04):
Absolutely, and they're calling the gut the
second brain, and that's because90 to 95% of our serotonin is
produced in our gut and at least50% of our dopamine is produced
in our gut.
So a lot of times people arelike, oh, I need to take this
(19:24):
antidepressant or whatever it isto help the chemical imbalance
in my brain.
But really there's a chemicalimbalance in your gut and that's
where we need to be focusing alot of that attention in our
energy is because, if you canclear up, a lot of people have
gut infections that they're noteven aware of.
They think that things are justkind of normal.
(19:47):
It's normal to have bloating orirregular bowels or whatever it
is.
But really if you clear upwhat's going on your gut, it has
a huge impact on your mentalhealth.
So a lot of people are like, oh, I'll just eat vegetables and
make sure I get my protein, butunless you have the gut flora
(20:08):
and the healthy gut bacteria todigest those things, then just
eating healthy is actually notgoing to be enough.
But if you get that cleared up,then when you eat healthy, then
you're actually supportingyourself.
Speaker 1 (20:21):
So are you working with them on just general health
then, as well, as well as thetrauma healing that you're doing
with them?
Speaker 2 (20:29):
Yeah, I think I believe you know they go hand in
hand and so, yes, we can workon skills and we can work on,
you know, these different parts.
And also your mental health istotally linked to your physical
health as well, so we can kindof play off each other in that
(20:49):
way.
So let's do some tweaks to thephysical health that will
improve the mental health andlet's do some of the mental
health to then be able to get tosome of the physical health too
.
Speaker 1 (20:59):
Yeah, and I think, like you said, they're so tied
together that even just workingon the mental health piece ends
up helping the physical healthas well.
I started my journey about twoyears ago with some RTT and
immediately I noticed that Istarted losing weight, and I
wasn't doing anything to loseweight, it just started falling
off.
I lost about 70 pounds in thecourse of a year while doing all
these different modalitiestrying to heal my mind, which in
(21:23):
turn started healing everythingelse as well.
Speaker 2 (21:25):
Yeah, absolutely.
What's RTT?
A few different things.
For those people that areinterested in all the good
freebies that are out there, Ihave a couple of different free
options.
One I have a blog that I sendout every two weeks.
I also have a 30 episodepodcast that is calledistic
(21:47):
Approach to Healing and itinterviews 30 different holistic
healers.
So if you're just kind ofstarting out or if you want to
find other modalities to yourhealing journey, that's a really
good resource.
I love resources, so I justconstantly am providing them.
The other resource that I havethat's chock full of resources
(22:08):
is a travel guide to yourhealing journey.
Oh, cool.
Speaker 1 (22:11):
What is the travel guide all about?
Speaker 2 (22:13):
Yeah, so that's really fun.
So I love to travel.
I actually just finished up ayear living in a van doing van
life all over the country.
So I'm a therapist and I loveto travel.
So I made a travel guide toyour healing journey and
basically it's laid out justlike a travel guide.
It gives you what to pack, likewhat to bring, what to leave
behind.
It talks about differentsightseeing stops you'll see
(22:35):
along the way.
It talks about cautions on theroad and it basically just kind
of lays out what you can expecton a healing journey.
It also gives you lots ofresources like podcasts to
listen to, books, to read people, to follow different things
(22:55):
like that.
So I love that resource.
That one's super fun.
I also have a monthly workshopseries that I do all about parts
work.
So that workshop series is onthe third Thursday of every
month and is free to anybody.
Um, and especially if anybody'son here listening and you work
(23:16):
with clients, it's great forpeople who work with clients and
it's great for people who arealso looking for their, their
own healing too and um, so, forexample, I do, like you know,
befriend your inner critic isone.
Soothe your inner child,strengthen your adult, hear your
inner teenager.
You know things like that, so Ido that once a month as well,
(23:36):
and then you would also findinformation about my speaking
events that I do and how to getin touch with me for individual
sessions.
Speaker 1 (23:46):
Okay, awesome.
And then do you, do yoursessions remotely.
Speaker 2 (23:51):
Yeah, everything is remote.
I do travel for speaking events.
I'm going to Washington DC tospeak at a conference.
I was just in California anddid a couple speaking events,
but yeah, everything is remote.
Speaker 1 (24:05):
Okay, cool, let's see what else can we chat about
here.
You said you were working on abook.
Speaker 2 (24:12):
Yes.
Speaker 1 (24:13):
What is that about?
Speaker 2 (24:14):
I am working on a book and it is my memoir.
A lot of people say I'm tooyoung to write a memoir, but a
lot happened in my first 30years of life, so that's what
it's about.
It's about the first 30 yearsof my.
So that's what it's about.
It's about the first 30 yearsof my life and kind of talks
walks through.
You know what it looked like onthe outside when I was dealing
with childhood trauma, a lot ofthe things that I was working
(24:36):
with and dealing with and thenhealing and forgiveness.
So I found forgiveness for myabuser about a month before my
30th birthday.
It was my goal.
I dedicated my 29th year toforgiveness and I found it has
been a game changer.
You know, I feel like I wasreally able to take my power
(25:10):
back and not be so controlled bysomebody else.
And somebody else who wasn'treally even in my life is in my
life and I'm able to talk tothem and um have compassion and
understanding for them and uh,and also have compassion and
(25:30):
understanding for myself and formy little girl and my inner
child and what she had toexperience and went through, and
I get to protect her now withboundaries and um.
You know, we don't really goback into that space anymore.
Speaker 1 (25:46):
She doesn't have that emotional charge that she used
to carry I imagine her lettinggo, something that painful was,
was a huge turn in your life it.
Speaker 2 (25:55):
Yes, it was massive, it was.
It was really like a lightswitch.
It was all of a sudden.
Once that moment hit, it waslike a massive weight was lifted
off my shoulders and I could.
It was almost like I could seeclearly again, or not even again
, for the first time in my life,and and that was that was
(26:16):
really significant to do- yeah,I can imagine.
Speaker 1 (26:20):
I had a similar experience as a kid and just
recently, in the last six monthsor so, had the opportunity to
confront that person and andheal from it, and we both
actually had a pretty powerfulhealing experience or letting go
of all that pain and guilt Wow.
Speaker 2 (26:40):
So, yeah, wow, that's huge.
Speaker 1 (26:47):
Yeah, wow, that's huge, yeah.
So if somebody was interestedin working with you, what, what,
what should they expect as faras the amount of time that they
would be working with you?
What, what sessions look like?
That sort of thing.
Speaker 2 (26:57):
Yeah.
So I offer a coaching packagethat is called the the whole
activation, the whole youactivation.
And that's where we go in andwe do these different interviews
.
We interview the inner critic,the inner child and the adult,
and we do an inner integrationsession and those are 90 minute
(27:18):
sessions and and that's kind ofa great place to start right
You're getting in touch withthese different parts, you're
getting to know them, you getjournaling exercises, you get um
different reflection pieces,and so that's a really great
package to start with, and thenfrom there we can incorporate
other things.
But I also use um music therapyto calm the nervous system.
(27:43):
That is a really huge.
I work with the polyvagaltheory and I work with basically
listening to certain filteredmusic that will help shift your
nervous system into a moreregulated state on a regular
basis.
So it's more than just like, oh, listen to this music when
(28:04):
you're triggered and you feelbetter's, like no, this gives
you long lasting impacts.
Okay, um, so that's, that'sreally cool.
I also do tapping, um, so eft,and for people who aren't
familiar with what tapping is,it's kind of like acupuncture,
but instead of putting needlesinto different energy points,
(28:26):
you physically tap on the bodyat different energy points, and
it is an amazing tool forreleasing old, stuck emotions,
traumas and negative corebeliefs.
Speaker 1 (28:38):
And is the EFT tapping?
Is that something that you'redoing specifically with the
client, or are you giving themexercises that they can do at
home?
Speaker 2 (28:45):
specifically with the client or are you giving them
exercises that they can do athome?
I specifically do that throughand then those are also 90
minute sessions and then I alsohave just regular 50 minute
sessions as well.
But if you're somebody who'sreally interested in kind of
hitting the ground running andyou're ready to have some
transformational work, I suggestyou know the longer sessions
(29:06):
can can really make some shiftsin a shorter amount of time.
Speaker 1 (29:11):
Cool, and you also mentioned that you do some work
in polyvagal theory.
Yes, could you give us anexercise that we could work on
as we close out and and do somevagal toning?
Speaker 2 (29:24):
Well, are you referring to like audio audible
vagal toning?
Uh, well, are you referring tolike audio audible vagal toning?
Speaker 1 (29:29):
It could be audible vagal toning, it could be
bilateral tapping, whatever.
Whatever you wanted to share.
Speaker 2 (29:37):
Okay, well, one of my , one of my favorites, is just
kind of to like notice the shiftis very subtle.
Um, so, when you're working withpolyvagal basically, the vagal
nerve is the nerve that runsfrom the top of your spine down
your whole body and radiatesthroughout your whole body, and
it is one of the maincontrollers of, like, your
(29:58):
nervous system and so whenyou're working with it, it's
very subtle.
And so, for example, I'm goingto invite you to go ahead and
slowly look around the room andidentify something that brings
(30:21):
you peace.
So it could be a color, itcould be a picture, it could be
something that brings you peace.
So it could be a color, itcould be a picture, it could be
something that brings you peace.
And once you find it, keep yourattention there.
And the reason we say slowlylook around the room is because
(30:44):
if you frantically look aroundthe room or quickly look around
the room, it will heighten yournervous system.
So the idea here is you want toslowly, gently, look around the
room, find something thatbrings you peace, a color, a
picture, something that bringsup a peaceful memory, whatever
it is, and then focus on it, andjust sit there and focus on it
(31:13):
and then, once you're doing this, if you feel any sort of shift
into relaxation or peace, thenfocus on that feeling of
relaxation and peace and reallymarinate in that feeling and
really marinate in that feeling.
Speaker 1 (31:36):
Yeah, I can definitely feel a softening in
my chest.
Speaker 2 (31:39):
There you go, and then you would want to really
marinate in the softening inyour chest and let that really
hold you.
So this is an exercise that youcan.
You know you can stay there aslong as you want, um, and it can
be really helpful when you knowit's just something short, fast
(32:04):
, you could do it anywhere.
Um, you know that you're thatyou feel safe technically, um,
feeling safe is important, um,especially to the nervous system
.
So, yeah, so that's one littleexercise that you can do.
Speaker 1 (32:16):
Okay, awesome.
Thank you for sharing that.
Is there anything else?
Speaker 2 (32:24):
you'd like to share with the audience Anything we
missed, you know?
Yeah, just the one thing.
Just for anybody listening whois either dabbling in, you know,
figuring out what their healingjourney looks like, or on their
healing journey, I just reallywant to let people know that
healing is possible.
And it can be really confusingand really frustrating because
(32:46):
we don't have the best mentalhealth system out there, but
there are resources availableand I would really encourage you
to follow your own instincts,your own intuition, your own
guidance around what could behelpful for you and really dive
(33:07):
into it.
You know we only got this onelife and so might as well make
it what you want, and I think abig part of doing that is by
doing the work and healing.
Speaker 1 (33:16):
Yeah, I'd agree.
It can be really challenging atfirst to admit that you need to
heal.
I think that a lot of us holdon to this I'm okay kind of
mentality to prevent themselvesfrom having to see where they're
not okay.
And facing the fact that you'renot okay and that you actually
(33:36):
need to do some work can bereally difficult.
But once you do it, man, it'slike a like a snowball effect.
Speaker 2 (33:43):
Absolutely Well.
I'm really excited for you that, like you're kind of in this
new, new place in life and thatmust be.
That must be really exciting.
Speaker 1 (33:52):
Yeah, you know, I went through a series of of
really traumatic relationshipsand trying to figure out what
was wrong with them Didn't doany good, you know.
So once I started realizing, Istarted listening to a to a
podcast by a person namedCaroline Strawson she's out of
the UK by a person namedCaroline Strawson.
She's out of the UK and shedoes some narcissistic abuse,
(34:16):
specialty type stuff in herpodcast but also talks a lot
about trauma.
And I have a history that'sjust chock full of trauma.
I mean, my first traumaticexperience was three days old
when my dad picked me up andspanked me because I was crying,
you know.
So it's all the way through mychildhood and then in the
military.
I had trauma in the military andthen continued trauma and
(34:36):
relationships after the military.
So by the time I realized thatI needed help, I needed it badly
.
I was in pretty bad shape andjust in the last two years it's
absolutely incredible how muchmy life has changed and how far
I've come.
And it's people like yourselfand Caroline and now me that are
helping to bring this stuff tothe forefront and it's it's
(34:58):
amazing to see.
It's amazing to see theresponse to from the general
public and how people areyearning for healing.
They really are.
We live in a sick world.
Speaker 2 (35:08):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (35:10):
Okay, uh, bren Langdale.
Thank you so much for joiningme on the podcast.
I really appreciate it.
Uh, if you guys are interestedin getting a hold of bren, she
can be reached at her websiteand that's
b-r-i-n-n-l-a-n-g-d-a-l-ecombren langdalecom, and I'll share
that in the notes as well.
She's got a specific link whereyou can get a hold of, uh, some
(35:31):
of the stuff that she'sreleasing, like workshops and
things like that.
So I'll get I'll get that inthe show notes for you guys as
well.
Thanks again, bryn, for fordoing this.
I really appreciate it, takingthe time out of your day.
Speaker 2 (35:43):
Yeah, thank you, russ .
Thanks for having me.
I really, really appreciate itas well.
Speaker 1 (35:47):
All right, we'll be in touch.
All right, guys?
Thanks so much and we'll seeyou next time.
Thanks.
Speaker 2 (35:53):
I hope you guys enjoyed this episode with Bryn.
Speaker 1 (36:00):
Bryn is brilliant when it comes to this part work
stuff and if you guys areinterested in working with Bryn,
she can be reached atBrynLangdalecom.
That'sB-R-I-N-N-L-A-N-G-D-A-L-Ecom.
If you put in forward slashlink that'll get you to the page
that has all of her programsand her freebies where you can
go in and get some informationand even some programs that she
(36:20):
offers at no cost.
Be sure to check her out.
If you guys are interested inworking with me doing brain
spotting, arts work, generalsomatic coaching, that type of
thing, I am also available forone-on-ones.
You can reach me atbrainspottingcscom.
That's brainspottingcs, likecoloradospringscom.
(36:42):
Just fill out the form thereand you'll get a little brochure
about all the differentpractices that I offer,
different modalities, as well asit'll get an email to me.
Just get an appointment withyou.
So once again, thanks forcoming by and checking out the
podcast and we'll see you nextweek.
Thank you.
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