When the Church Hurts – and Heals: A Conversation on Church Hurt, Healing & Hope

#37 In this powerful and deeply personal episode of Uncomfortable Conversations with Christians, Paul Basden sits down with longtime Preston Trail Creative Pastor Allison Harrell and couples group coordinator D’Anthony Forte to talk about a subject too many know firsthand: church hurt.

Allison opens up about growing up in a high-control religious group she now recognizes as a cult—where authority went unchecked, manipulation was normalized, and eventually, her family was excommunicated. D’Anthony shares how fear-based faith, legalism, and judgment shaped his earliest experiences with church, leading to decades of anxiety and a 14-year absence from Christian community.

Together, they discuss:

• What spiritual abuse and toxic church cultures can look like
• Why walking away is sometimes a survival response—and why coming back is possible
• The role of therapy, vulnerability, and real community in healing
• How God’s love can meet us in our rawest, most wounded places
• The surprising truth: church can still be the place where healing happens

Whether you’ve been burned by spiritual authority, are afraid to trust again, or are simply walking alongside someone who’s been hurt, this episode offers honesty, grace, and hope.

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