Cycles, Stress, and the Wisdom of Menopause with Michelle Dixon

Episode Transcript
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there were moments when I felt like I could actually have a psychotic breakdown.

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Like this is just a, it was a really fine line.
.697They they were coming at one point every half an hour, all day long. 4 00:00:09,735.3919999999 --> 00:00:10,565.392 I had it bad. 5 00:00:11,75.392 --> 00:00:13,305.392 Um, it was bad. 6 00:00:13,565.392 --> 00:00:22,135.392 There were moments when I thought I feel like I'm losing my mind and I, I'm just sharing that because I'm so sure that there are other women out there who have this experience and they're terrified. 7 00:00:22,135.392 --> 00:00:33,733.791 They're like, am I going, am I psychotic? Welcome to Wendy goes deep. 8 00:00:33,833.791 --> 00:00:34,553.791 I am Wendy. 9 00:00:34,603.791 --> 00:00:37,203.791 And today I have Michelle Dixon on with me. 10 00:00:37,833.791 --> 00:00:48,713.79 Now, I was fortunate enough to interview Michelle Dixon for my women 2020 conference, and we've stayed in touch, but it's been a while since I've been able to go have a good deep conversation with her. 11 00:00:48,763.791 --> 00:00:55,653.791 So I wanted to bring her on and talk about And see what she's up to and hear about all the amazing goodness that she is creating in this world. 12 00:00:55,653.791 --> 00:01:03,153.79 Because if you do not know her, you are missing out because she is just an amazing human besides being an amazing practitioner. 13 00:01:03,543.791 --> 00:01:10,353.79 And so a little bit about Michelle is that she's a holistic practitioner with qualifications in many different modalities. 14 00:01:10,773.79 --> 00:01:12,403.79 She specializes in trauma. 15 00:01:12,683.791 --> 00:01:15,503.791 Mostly working with adult survivors of child abuse. 16 00:01:15,823.791 --> 00:01:22,793.791 In addition, she mentors holistic practitioners in soul led trauma healing, as well as conscious business and marketing skills. 17 00:01:23,143.791 --> 00:01:24,803.791 And she's also a writer. 18 00:01:25,403.79 --> 00:01:26,273.79 Welcome, Michelle. 19 00:01:26,744.791 --> 00:01:27,834.791 Thank you, Wendy. 20 00:01:27,844.791 --> 00:01:28,864.791 It's great to catch up. 21 00:01:29,823.791 --> 00:01:31,273.791 I know I'm so excited. 22 00:01:31,553.791 --> 00:01:38,248.691 Now, last time for women, 2020, we went deep into trauma and about, you know, how to work with that. 23 00:01:38,508.791 --> 00:01:43,674.791 Now, probably it's going to be coming up because you know, it's you and me Yeah. 24 00:01:43,978.791 --> 00:01:45,388.791 having a conversation. 25 00:01:45,928.791 --> 00:02:03,663.791 Um, so, but I kind of wanted to go in a little bit about something that both you and I seem to kind of be going through, which is as you get up in age as a female, Your body changes. 26 00:02:04,324.791 --> 00:02:05,104.791 Oh my gosh. 27 00:02:05,173.791 --> 00:02:19,764.791 while, while you might have been lucky enough to learn about hormonal changes as a teenager to prepare you as you go through, you know, the, what's that transition called? Puberty. 28 00:02:19,764.891 --> 00:02:21,334.691 Yeah. 29 00:02:24,648.791 --> 00:02:26,738.791 You might learn about puberty ahead of time. 30 00:02:26,738.791 --> 00:02:28,498.79 So you're kind of aware of it. 31 00:02:29,248.791 --> 00:02:37,968.79 But when it comes to like the reverse puberty, you know, age it just is like a little bit of a jungle. 32 00:02:37,978.79 --> 00:02:40,854.791 At least it has been for me Oh, for sure. 33 00:02:41,498.791 --> 00:02:41,938.791 Yeah. 34 00:02:42,328.791 --> 00:02:42,718.791 Okay. 35 00:02:42,728.791 --> 00:02:44,78.791 So not alone there. 36 00:02:44,104.791 --> 00:02:44,364.791 it. 37 00:02:44,784.79 --> 00:02:45,224.79 Yeah. 38 00:02:45,244.791 --> 00:02:47,84.791 We, yeah, it's not talked about. 39 00:02:47,114.79 --> 00:02:57,713.791 So it was quite a shock for me when things started to happen because I'm like, what is happening? Why can't anyone give me an explanation? What's like, what's going on here? Yeah. 40 00:02:58,279.791 --> 00:02:58,769.791 Yeah. 41 00:02:59,523.791 --> 00:03:12,653.791 I started noticing changes in my period in particular, like just with consistent, not, not consistency with tummy, but actually like the consistency of the, of the blood. 42 00:03:13,133.791 --> 00:03:18,953.791 And I went to my doctor and I wanted to find out like, how do I get this back in balance? And they're like, nothing's wrong. 43 00:03:19,43.791 --> 00:03:23,473.791 I'm like, you know, I've been having periods for 30 years. 44 00:03:23,473.791 --> 00:03:23,593.791 Yeah. 45 00:03:23,613.891 --> 00:03:26,439.791 I does. 46 00:03:26,569.791 --> 00:03:26,879.791 Yeah. 47 00:03:26,879.891 --> 00:03:27,209.691 Yeah. 48 00:03:28,973.791 --> 00:03:29,709.791 like, Yeah. 49 00:03:30,653.791 --> 00:03:35,83.791 how can you tell me nothing's nothing's like, everything's fine and everything's okay. 50 00:03:35,83.791 --> 00:03:37,913.791 I'm like, something isn't right. 51 00:03:37,943.791 --> 00:03:39,873.7905 Like this is not the way it's supposed to be. 52 00:03:39,873.7905 --> 00:03:41,383.791 And they're like, Oh, you're just getting older. 53 00:03:42,143.79 --> 00:03:43,983.791 That was, that was it. 54 00:03:43,993.791 --> 00:03:48,513.791 Cause like once the panel, you know, came back, everything was okay. 55 00:03:49,363.791 --> 00:03:50,889.791 And I, Yeah. 56 00:03:50,889.791 --> 00:03:55,299.79 You your tests and they're like, you're normal, but you're like, something's changing. 57 00:03:55,299.791 --> 00:03:55,569.791 Yeah. 58 00:03:55,569.791 --> 00:03:58,149.79 For me, for me, it was like anxiety. 59 00:03:58,189.79 --> 00:03:59,89.79 I suddenly got anxiety. 60 00:04:00,64.791 --> 00:04:00,864.791 Super anxious. 61 00:04:01,134.791 --> 00:04:02,784.791 I had been trying, I always track my people. 62 00:04:02,784.791 --> 00:04:07,544.791 I don't have periods anymore, but when I had them, I would track them on a, you know, on an app. 63 00:04:07,584.791 --> 00:04:10,854.791 So I could see like, you know, it was 28 days, 34 days. 64 00:04:10,854.791 --> 00:04:15,664.79 So they started getting really wacky, like 28 days, 50 days, 17 days. 65 00:04:15,904.791 --> 00:04:39,494.791 You know, 28 days and, and then, and then like over a period of seven years, I could actually look at my app and see, it's like I had 12 periods this year and then I had 10 and then I had eight and then I had four and now I've had zero, you know, just aside from that, which is like the normal thing, I think for me, it was just like, suddenly I woke up and I felt like these like anxiety attacks, these panics in the morning, like this. 66 00:04:39,634.791 --> 00:04:45,104.791 And then, and then like this rush of like terror and fear followed by a hot flush. 67 00:04:46,59.791 --> 00:04:47,459.791 And that was, that was my clue. 68 00:04:47,469.791 --> 00:04:48,919.791 Like something's really not right. 69 00:04:48,949.791 --> 00:05:00,709.791 And that's the thing I would have liked to be prepared for because it's really gnarly, like just feeling like you just, know, um, I'd never, I've never officially suffered from anxiety. 70 00:05:00,709.791 --> 00:05:07,409.791 I mean, I've had like kind of emotional breakdowns when I've gone through really tough stuff in my life, you know, like divorce and all of that. 71 00:05:07,419.791 --> 00:05:21,9.791 Like I've had emotions and I've had periods where I've been super anxious, but this kind of anxiety was just like, It was just like a lightning bolt was like, suddenly I'm in full body terror and I don't know why. 72 00:05:21,29.791 --> 00:05:25,359.791 And, um, yeah, it was, it was challenging to say in the least. 73 00:05:26,153.791 --> 00:05:31,143.791 yeah, I, I can relate a little, little bit to it. 74 00:05:31,833.791 --> 00:05:45,113.79 I have ADHD and I'm pretty certain that pretty much every human I know that when you have ADHD, like a diagnosis, it means that your symptoms, because everyone really is a little ADHD. 75 00:05:45,163.791 --> 00:05:47,813.791 And I know some people hate hearing that, but. 76 00:05:48,203.791 --> 00:05:49,869.791 They're symptoms, right? Yeah. 77 00:05:50,413.791 --> 00:05:57,973.791 If your symptoms are drastic enough that you have to get a diagnosis, that's the difference between being a little ADHD. 78 00:05:58,443.791 --> 00:05:59,833.791 It's like you can be sad. 79 00:05:59,833.791 --> 00:06:00,673.791 Everyone's been sad. 80 00:06:00,693.791 --> 00:06:03,49.791 Everyone, everyone has sadness Yeah. 81 00:06:03,253.791 --> 00:06:04,833.791 and some are clinically depressed. 82 00:06:05,223.79 --> 00:06:06,263.79 That's the difference. 83 00:06:06,263.791 --> 00:06:25,593.791 Right? What I do know is people who kind of have that diagnosis of ADHD where it's, you know, hugely symptomatic is that there's a constant low at a minimum low level anxiety, but often for high level anxiety that we live with all the time. 84 00:06:26,213.791 --> 00:06:35,969.791 So I don't know if it's because I've gotten older with age or not because I pretty much have always had You've always had a little bit. 85 00:06:35,989.791 --> 00:06:36,339.791 Yeah. 86 00:06:36,339.791 --> 00:06:36,739.791 Yeah. 87 00:06:37,69.791 --> 00:06:43,469.791 I think for, for me I, and I, and I, totally understand now that everyone's experience is so different. 88 00:06:43,689.791 --> 00:06:56,474.791 Um, there are some commonalities, but so different, but the common thing with menopausal anxiety is that it's actually, what's happening is that you have a rush of adrenaline because of, often is estrogen is dropping. 89 00:06:56,484.791 --> 00:06:59,294.791 And so like your body is just like, like, what's happening. 90 00:06:59,554.791 --> 00:07:07,254.79 You have this rush of adrenaline and then this like sudden, sudden, like flush of panic, like really intense panic. 91 00:07:07,264.79 --> 00:07:16,974.791 And then you get hot and then you have the sweats and then you have, so that's usually the trajectory of, and that's kind of how, you know, that it's, that it's hormonal is that there's usually those three parts. 92 00:07:17,4.791 --> 00:07:28,704.791 So usually if you, Any, any woman listening who has hot flushes, you'll, you probably will know when one's about to come on because you'll start to feel suddenly like, Oh, I feel, I feel suddenly anxious or worried or concerned. 93 00:07:28,714.791 --> 00:07:30,534.79 And like, if you track it, you'll go, Oh, right. 94 00:07:30,564.791 --> 00:07:30,864.7905 Okay. 95 00:07:30,864.7905 --> 00:07:31,404.791 Here it comes. 96 00:07:31,464.791 --> 00:07:32,424.791 Yeah, that's it. 97 00:07:32,874.791 --> 00:07:40,514.791 Um, but I didn't know that like, For four years ago, I just had this terror feeling. 98 00:07:40,514.791 --> 00:07:46,784.791 And there were moments when like, to be honest, like there were moments when I felt like I could actually have a psychotic breakdown. 99 00:07:46,784.791 --> 00:07:48,954.791 Like this is just a, it was a really fine line. 100 00:07:49,44.791 --> 00:07:51,964.791 They they were coming at one point every half an hour, all day long. 101 00:07:52,819.791 --> 00:07:53,649.791 I had it bad. 102 00:07:54,159.791 --> 00:07:56,389.791 Um, it was bad. 103 00:07:56,699.791 --> 00:08:06,319.791 But, um, yeah, there were moments when I thought I feel like I'm losing my mind and I, I'm just sharing that because I'm so sure that there are other women out there who have this experience and they're terrified. 104 00:08:06,319.791 --> 00:08:11,69.791 They're like, am I going, am I psychotic? Um, what I didn't, because I didn't know what was happening. 105 00:08:11,69.791 --> 00:08:12,289.791 I didn't know to have it checked. 106 00:08:12,289.791 --> 00:08:19,149.791 I just thought, oh gosh, like, but I would now, you know, go have my hormone levels checked to go, you know, see. 107 00:08:19,494.791 --> 00:08:27,34.791 You know, whatever practitioner that you normally see and find out, because it is on the spectrum of normal, you know, you can feel like so disrupted. 108 00:08:27,44.791 --> 00:08:30,24.79 And that usually happens when you have like a really precipitous drop. 109 00:08:30,914.791 --> 00:08:35,834.791 I, so I think for me, whatever process might, because I'm, I'm turning 50 in like two weeks. 110 00:08:36,54.791 --> 00:08:40,34.791 So I'm my, my mother didn't go through menopause till she was 55. 111 00:08:40,44.791 --> 00:08:41,604.791 She had periods till she was 55. 112 00:08:41,604.791 --> 00:08:41,854.791 Right. 113 00:08:41,874.791 --> 00:08:44,984.7905 So this is young in my family, family history. 114 00:08:44,984.7905 --> 00:08:48,74.79 So that's part of the reason I wasn't really prepared for it. 115 00:08:48,74.791 --> 00:08:51,494.79 You know, I was thinking usually, you know, you're kind of like your mother in that regard. 116 00:08:51,494.791 --> 00:08:53,674.791 So I was thinking, Oh, I've got a few more years. 117 00:08:53,689.791 --> 00:09:05,979.79 But I think because I'd had a lot of stress in my thirties because of Aversed crises, you know, what happens, and you would know this, Wendy, like what happens when you're super stressed is that you're producing all this cortisol. 118 00:09:05,979.791 --> 00:09:12,729.79 And if you don't have enough cortisol, like your body starts to mine progesterone, so it actually can send you into menopause earlier. 119 00:09:12,769.791 --> 00:09:16,109.791 And there are a lot of interesting studies around, and I'm just disclaimer. 120 00:09:16,109.791 --> 00:09:23,4.791 I'm, I, you know, I, as Wendy said, I'm just a practitioner, but I'm a human female bodied person who's gone through menopause. 121 00:09:23,54.791 --> 00:09:24,94.791 So that's my experience. 122 00:09:24,94.791 --> 00:09:27,714.791 I'm so not an expert, but I, I do enjoy reading all the studies. 123 00:09:27,744.791 --> 00:09:34,334.791 So, you know, I can, I can say that it is true that if you've gone through trauma, you might go through menopause earlier. 124 00:09:34,634.791 --> 00:09:39,994.791 Um, women of color tend to go through menopause earlier because of racialized for example. 125 00:09:40,24.791 --> 00:09:46,214.791 So like, I do think that in my experience, it probably happened earlier because of all the stress I experienced in my thirties. 126 00:09:46,443.91517531 --> 00:09:55,633.91517531 and I started having these symptoms in my late thirties and they're like, Oh, you're just going to be going through menopause early now I'm still cycling. 127 00:09:56,33.91517531 --> 00:10:00,423.91417531 And it is because I started learning so much more about this. 128 00:10:00,908.91517531 --> 00:10:24,548.91517531 It's not coincidental that as I started, you know, this, my, my practice of becoming an orgasm and neuropleasure coach and learning about how to, um, you know, we talked, we've talked about de armoring, you know, multiple times, you know, before, and I've told, I've told you about, actually, you're very instrumental in helping me create my yoni dearmouring course, by the way. 129 00:10:25,224.91517531 --> 00:10:26,848.91517531 really? of our conversations. 130 00:10:26,848.91517531 --> 00:10:27,188.91517531 Yeah. 131 00:10:27,618.91517531 --> 00:10:29,208.91517531 Um, and. 132 00:10:29,563.91517531 --> 00:10:34,63.91517531 It was, you know, really kind of understanding what was happening biologically. 133 00:10:34,73.91517531 --> 00:10:41,303.91417531 And I was doing this for pleasure purposes because I was going on my own sexual, you know, awakening, figure I'm not getting any younger. 134 00:10:41,303.91517531 --> 00:10:42,923.91517531 If I'm going to do it, I better do it now. 135 00:10:43,193.91417531 --> 00:10:44,959.91517531 You know, one of those Yeah. 136 00:10:45,253.91517531 --> 00:10:49,853.91517531 but in doing so, I learned so much about, you know, the impact of trauma on the body. 137 00:10:50,673.91517531 --> 00:10:55,123.91517531 And as I started healing my trauma, my periods came back better. 138 00:10:55,823.91517531 --> 00:11:07,548.91417531 And so Yeah, and, um, I have, I actually have a couple of clients that were in menopause that actually have reversed it through different practices that we've done. 139 00:11:07,578.91517531 --> 00:11:20,98.91417531 And it's, it's so much of it is the healing practice because our bodies really are designed to, you know, like menopause is a symptom that your body's too stressed out. 140 00:11:20,508.91517531 --> 00:11:24,9.91517531 To create new life and That is so interesting. 141 00:11:24,459.91517531 --> 00:11:26,409.91517531 I, I, yeah, I want to hear more about this. 142 00:11:26,439.91517531 --> 00:11:47,998.91517531 That's so yeah, and so, yeah, I know like there's so many, so many areas of this to go down, um, as someone with ADHD diagnosis, because of the symptoms are drastic enough, it's tied primarily to, uh, dopamine, which a lot of people don't realize that progesterone is a precursor to the production of dopamine. 143 00:11:48,948.91517531 --> 00:11:49,788.91517531 And so. 144 00:11:50,313.91517531 --> 00:12:00,448.91517531 Yeah, so a lot of people with ADHD have a tendency to go to menopause earlier and that's Really, because they're the dopamine production. 145 00:12:00,498.91517531 --> 00:12:06,118.91517531 It's all tied together, right? So if you're making cortisol, you're not making progesterone. 146 00:12:06,118.91517531 --> 00:12:22,748.91517531 And if you don't have enough progesterone, you can't make enough dopamine, right? So you start seeing how there's this cycle, right? That, that you get into, but once you You know, healing the trauma and doing all the things and like reduce your cortisol production, then your body can make more progesterone. 147 00:12:23,388.91517531 --> 00:12:32,558.91617531 And so your body is constantly taking from your reproductive organs because the natural cycle of estrogen and progesterone. 148 00:12:32,978.91617531 --> 00:12:39,528.91617531 Production that would happen like in your adrenals and your other glands isn't happening at the, the, the level it needs to. 149 00:12:39,558.91617531 --> 00:12:41,528.91617531 So that's why it takes from the reproductive organs. 150 00:12:42,783.91617531 --> 00:12:53,823.91617531 And it's the same with for guys, right? So if you're too stressed as a male, then your body's not making the proper amount of testosterone, like natural, naturally without your testes. 151 00:12:54,773.91617531 --> 00:12:55,183.91617531 Right. 152 00:12:55,573.91617531 --> 00:12:57,833.91617531 Um, and so then it will reach from your testes. 153 00:12:57,953.91617531 --> 00:12:58,253.91617531 Yeah. 154 00:12:59,44.91617531 --> 00:12:59,584.91617531 Yeah. 155 00:12:59,624.91617531 --> 00:12:59,984.91617531 Okay. 156 00:12:59,984.91617531 --> 00:13:06,83.91617531 So, so, um, with men there's a link between cortisol and testosterone then, is that what you're saying? Yeah. 157 00:13:06,614.91617531 --> 00:13:06,774.91617531 Yeah. 158 00:13:06,904.91617531 --> 00:13:07,474.91617531 Yeah. 159 00:13:07,864.91617531 --> 00:13:08,214.91617531 Yeah. 160 00:13:08,214.91617531 --> 00:13:09,294.91617531 I totally get that. 161 00:13:09,294.91617531 --> 00:13:11,154.91617531 And I have definitely seen that as well. 162 00:13:11,184.91617531 --> 00:13:12,234.91617531 So that's really interesting. 163 00:13:12,234.91617531 --> 00:13:31,754.91617531 Cause one of the things with menopause is they say they, I just mean like, you know, conventional, conventional medicine, you know, the establishment, you know, it's like what we know so far that's out there in the world that, you know, um, the moment that you, that you're officially menopausal, which officially is when you've had 12 months and no period. 164 00:13:32,174.91617531 --> 00:13:34,724.91617531 Um, so it's, you can't diagnose. 165 00:13:34,724.91617531 --> 00:13:37,574.91617531 I don't like the word to diagnose it because it's like a normal process. 166 00:13:37,574.91617531 --> 00:13:39,244.91617531 Like we're not meant to have babies when we're 80. 167 00:13:39,264.91617531 --> 00:13:44,509.91617531 So why, you know, but So we can't diagnose it, but we can do tests on various hormones. 168 00:13:44,519.91617531 --> 00:13:52,619.91617531 But like, but once you hit that official menopausal stage, um, your risk factors for all these different things go up and up and up. 169 00:13:52,679.91617531 --> 00:13:57,609.91617531 So it's actually then really unpleasant to go to the doctor because it's like, Oh, okay. 170 00:13:57,609.91617531 --> 00:14:16,739.91567531 Like you're not producing, you know, FSH, which is the hormone that's telling you, are you have the communication between your brain and your ovaries to, you know, is it, are you producing, are you dropping any eggs? No, the FSH levels, if they're really high, they'll tell you that your brain is constantly trying to get your body to release an egg. 171 00:14:16,739.91567531 --> 00:14:18,379.91617531 And it's like, no, we're not doing it. 172 00:14:18,419.91617531 --> 00:14:19,109.91517531 We can't do it. 173 00:14:20,359.91617531 --> 00:14:24,519.91617531 So like when this happens, know, then the very next conversation. 174 00:14:25,109.91617531 --> 00:14:43,99.91517531 Not just for myself, but like all the women I know who are at this age and stage is like, okay, now we need to start worrying about your bone density because that, you know, and the, basically the way I understand it again, disclaimer, not an expert, but basically estrogen is extremely protective of all of your body processes and your organs, right? It helps your liver detox faster. 175 00:14:43,99.91617531 --> 00:14:50,514.81617531 And so you could say without all of the estrogen from your procreational years, you know, you, you're starting to see. 176 00:14:50,584.91617531 --> 00:14:55,374.91617531 See where maybe you could be healthier that you've just basically been lucky. 177 00:14:55,384.91617531 --> 00:15:00,654.91617531 And you've just kind of like, you've kind of like got through it all because estrogen has been really helping you. 178 00:15:00,954.91617531 --> 00:15:07,724.91617531 And then without the estrogen, you're finally figuring out, Oh, well, actually like I have some toxicity in my body or I have this or that. 179 00:15:07,725.01617531 --> 00:15:16,89.91617531 Um, But, um, so, so yeah, there's this thing of like, you don't want, I remember when I early on, um, was getting these symptoms, I did a lot of acupuncture, which helped. 180 00:15:16,519.91617531 --> 00:15:20,569.91617531 And my acupuncturist was saying like, we need to get your periods more regular. 181 00:15:20,569.91617531 --> 00:15:21,429.91567531 You need to keep going. 182 00:15:21,429.91567531 --> 00:15:22,789.91617531 And I was like, I'm so done. 183 00:15:23,419.91617531 --> 00:15:24,904.81617531 Like in my heart, I was like, I'm so done. 184 00:15:25,74.91617531 --> 00:15:27,564.91617531 so done with like, it's okay. 185 00:15:27,604.91617531 --> 00:15:29,594.91617531 I've, you know, I've birthed three children. 186 00:15:29,594.91617531 --> 00:15:30,744.91617531 I have three stepchildren. 187 00:15:30,744.91617531 --> 00:15:31,994.91617531 Like I'm done. 188 00:15:32,404.91617531 --> 00:15:34,124.91617531 I want to not worry about pregnancy. 189 00:15:34,124.91617531 --> 00:15:36,464.91617531 I want to, um, I've taken up surfing. 190 00:15:36,514.91617531 --> 00:15:37,664.91517531 So like, it's great. 191 00:15:37,694.91517531 --> 00:15:39,14.91617531 I can go away and not worry. 192 00:15:39,444.91517531 --> 00:15:42,64.91517531 I can surf when I'm bleeding, but it's inconvenient. 193 00:15:42,74.91517531 --> 00:15:44,374.91617531 You know, I was like, I'm done. 194 00:15:44,374.91617531 --> 00:15:48,874.91617531 And she's like, no, no, you don't want to be done because there are all these protective things and your health is better. 195 00:15:48,884.91617531 --> 00:15:55,334.91517531 And so that's just remind the question Mark for me, because, um, I know personally, like I. 196 00:15:55,999.91617531 --> 00:15:58,469.91617531 I haven't quite got to 12 months yet of no period. 197 00:15:58,469.91617531 --> 00:16:05,989.91617531 I'm getting really close, but my FSH levels are super elevated and I see an integrative practitioner, an integrative doctor who specializes in hormones. 198 00:16:05,999.91617531 --> 00:16:09,389.91617531 She's like, based on this, I'd be super surprised if you ever bled again. 199 00:16:09,789.91617531 --> 00:16:15,519.91517531 So I'm feeling like in myself, like for the first time, I'm not suffering from all of the whatever, right. 200 00:16:16,579.91517531 --> 00:16:20,479.91517531 Um, and I'm feeling like, okay, like I'm, I'm liking this feeling. 201 00:16:20,499.91517531 --> 00:16:22,429.91517531 I'm going to just feel great and healthy. 202 00:16:23,4.91617531 --> 00:16:26,34.91617531 But what I'm being told is that all these things are gonna fall to pieces. 203 00:16:26,34.91617531 --> 00:16:27,384.91617531 So, yeah. 204 00:16:27,384.91617531 --> 00:16:28,74.91617531 I don't know. 205 00:16:28,164.91617531 --> 00:16:31,153.91617531 Do I wanna have more periods? I don't know. 206 00:16:31,154.01617531 --> 00:16:33,393.91617531 I, I, I like you. 207 00:16:34,204.91617531 --> 00:16:34,414.91617531 Yeah. 208 00:16:34,743.91617531 --> 00:16:40,53.9161753 Next thing I've gone through a different journeys with it for myself as well. 209 00:16:40,453.9151753 --> 00:16:43,253.9151753 So as someone who is. 210 00:16:43,723.9161753 --> 00:16:49,123.9161753 Out and about in the world experiencing many, many different things. 211 00:16:49,424.9161753 --> 00:16:49,964.9161753 Yes. 212 00:16:50,673.9161753 --> 00:16:57,163.9161753 Um, the idea of not having to worry about getting pregnant is very enticing. 213 00:16:57,403.9161753 --> 00:16:57,763.9161753 Right. 214 00:16:58,663.9161753 --> 00:17:04,203.9151753 And so there was a, there was a point in which I definitely was like, am I done yet? Am I done yet? Right. 215 00:17:04,823.9151753 --> 00:17:13,638.9161753 But then as I started understanding a little bit more about what Everything is now part of the reason I did this. 216 00:17:13,658.9161753 --> 00:17:28,338.9161753 I had a client who was in her late forties whose doctor said she's in menopause and, um, because she was already at 10 months and like, chances are you're in menopause, like just like her numbers, you know, the panels and all the thing. 217 00:17:29,38.9151753 --> 00:17:33,218.9161753 And so she was like, can you help me? Right. 218 00:17:33,268.9161753 --> 00:17:35,588.9161753 Cause I, she didn't have a kid yet. 219 00:17:35,908.9161753 --> 00:17:37,448.9161753 She really wanted to try. 220 00:17:37,808.9161753 --> 00:17:39,778.9161753 She wasn't in a relationship yet. 221 00:17:39,788.9161753 --> 00:17:45,333.9161753 So she's like, You know, you know, all the things, right? Like she was super successful business wise. 222 00:17:45,343.9161753 --> 00:17:49,683.9151753 She thought she was going to have plenty of time as is the story for a lot of people. 223 00:17:50,373.9161753 --> 00:17:57,253.9161753 And so in trying to be like, let me see if I can like, let me see if I can find something that like people just aren't talking about. 224 00:17:57,293.9151753 --> 00:17:57,483.9151753 Right. 225 00:17:57,493.9161753 --> 00:17:59,173.9151753 Cause the research is always there. 226 00:17:59,173.9151753 --> 00:18:00,84.9161753 It's just not that. 227 00:18:00,414.9161753 --> 00:18:00,894.9161753 Yeah. 228 00:18:00,954.9161753 --> 00:18:01,884.9161753 We don't know everything. 229 00:18:01,884.9161753 --> 00:18:03,624.9161753 There's always some weird way. 230 00:18:03,654.9161753 --> 00:18:04,74.9161753 Yeah. 231 00:18:04,773.9161753 --> 00:18:16,538.9161753 And so as I started like, Like, like, okay, where, like, where it's this, what's this, what's that, and kind of developing this protocol for her to get on. 232 00:18:16,908.9161753 --> 00:18:22,528.9161753 And she, I mean, I remember like she was on for, so she's going to be 50 soon. 233 00:18:22,918.9151753 --> 00:18:27,388.9161753 And she finally like kind of developed the protocol, uh, I'll do it. 234 00:18:27,448.9161753 --> 00:18:28,718.9161753 I'm going to try these other things. 235 00:18:28,818.9161753 --> 00:18:29,988.9161753 I'll do, I'll try these. 236 00:18:30,258.9161753 --> 00:18:30,518.9161753 Finally. 237 00:18:30,518.9161753 --> 00:18:31,508.9161753 She's like, okay, I'm going to do it. 238 00:18:32,228.9161753 --> 00:18:32,858.9161753 And she did it. 239 00:18:33,258.9161753 --> 00:18:34,768.9161753 And I was like, I'll take about three months. 240 00:18:34,798.9161753 --> 00:18:35,628.9161753 But within three months. 241 00:18:36,708.9161753 --> 00:18:38,598.9161753 If it's going to happen, this is when it's going to happen. 242 00:18:38,928.9161753 --> 00:18:39,308.9161753 Right. 243 00:18:39,309.0161753 --> 00:18:43,108.9161753 You know, just, you know, realistically, she forgot that I had said three months. 244 00:18:43,228.9161753 --> 00:18:43,478.9161753 Right. 245 00:18:43,498.9161753 --> 00:18:46,48.9161753 But I know because like I helped her decide today. 246 00:18:46,888.9161753 --> 00:18:49,778.9156753 Um, and she called me up, I was like, look, it's three months. 247 00:18:49,778.9156753 --> 00:18:53,548.9151753 She's like, Oh my God, I totally forgot that you said it was going to be three months. 248 00:18:53,638.9161753 --> 00:18:56,48.9161753 And it's because of just working with the body. 249 00:18:56,248.9161753 --> 00:18:58,938.9161753 Also, ironically, it's also working with the moon. 250 00:18:58,938.9161753 --> 00:19:07,28.9161753 So along this time, I've started really paying attention to what, you know, The moon cycles are and what that actually means on the body. 251 00:19:07,28.9161753 --> 00:19:09,188.9161753 Cause there's all this misinformation about, Oh, it means this. 252 00:19:09,188.9161753 --> 00:19:09,848.9161753 It means that. 253 00:19:09,848.9161753 --> 00:19:12,444.9161753 And if you, Ah, I'm but actually, in that. 254 00:19:12,958.9161753 --> 00:19:13,318.9161753 Yeah. 255 00:19:13,318.9161753 --> 00:19:18,918.9151753 because all life on this planet has evolved to handle the radiation of the sun. 256 00:19:19,108.9161753 --> 00:19:19,528.9161753 Right. 257 00:19:20,518.9161753 --> 00:19:22,158.9151753 Um, so whether that's. 258 00:19:22,718.9161753 --> 00:19:29,508.9161753 Whether you're a day dweller, a night dweller at the bottom of the ocean, right? You know, it doesn't matter where you are. 259 00:19:29,918.9161753 --> 00:19:35,168.9161753 As far as a life species, you have to handle the radiation of the sun. 260 00:19:35,178.9161753 --> 00:19:39,408.9161753 Like somehow, some way your body, your form has to do deal with it. 261 00:19:39,758.9161753 --> 00:19:44,788.9161753 And at the full moon, there's more radiation being sent back down to the earth. 262 00:19:45,428.9161753 --> 00:19:47,208.9161753 And so, yeah. 263 00:19:47,718.9161753 --> 00:19:50,968.9161753 And so across species, it's, uh, it. 264 00:19:51,513.9161753 --> 00:20:01,203.9161753 In particular, mammalian species across mammalian species for day dwelling mammalian species, the, they have heightened cortisol. 265 00:20:01,573.9161753 --> 00:20:05,763.9161753 And in fact, the males have lower testosterone, the full moon. 266 00:20:06,253.9151753 --> 00:20:07,923.9161753 Right? And so. 267 00:20:08,803.9161753 --> 00:20:14,823.9161753 I started finding, like, try to see, like, has anyone else in the research? Harman, like, like, come on. 268 00:20:14,843.9161753 --> 00:20:17,713.9161753 Like if I had this idea, someone else has probably had this idea. 269 00:20:18,73.9161753 --> 00:20:21,93.9161753 And eventually I came across some different research. 270 00:20:21,133.9161753 --> 00:20:32,943.9151753 Now they're not some, like, there's a couple of really good studies that are huge sample sizes, but there's some that are smaller, but I'll still take the some that are smaller because at least there's a pattern there to start kind of playing off of. 271 00:20:33,273.9151753 --> 00:20:39,113.9151753 And it coincided with the, what I had been documenting for the last couple of years, as I was. 272 00:20:39,948.9161753 --> 00:20:50,558.9161753 Kind of being like, is this, is this actually what's happening? Because I started noticing these patterns that were kind of, I thought it was just the females and the cycles and, you know, tracking that. 273 00:20:50,558.9161753 --> 00:20:59,758.9161753 But then my, my male clients all often were having some of the same things coming up in their life and the same kind of responses to stuff. 274 00:20:59,758.9161753 --> 00:21:04,598.9161753 And I was like, there's gotta be something, obviously that's, you know, it's gotta be something else. 275 00:21:05,528.9161753 --> 00:21:10,748.9161753 And so I started like kind of tracking it with the moon and was like, Oh, there's definitely a thing. 276 00:21:10,748.9161753 --> 00:21:19,838.9151753 And then I started, you know, just putting it together like, Oh wait, yeah, there's more radiation at the full moon and there's less radiate in the least amount during the new moon. 277 00:21:20,198.9151753 --> 00:21:21,948.9151753 And then there's the balance in between. 278 00:21:21,948.9151753 --> 00:21:24,278.9161753 And so, uh, depending on where you are. 279 00:21:25,148.9161753 --> 00:21:34,743.9161753 So if you know that and you start like you using, Using the, the energy of like the earth and the, I know it's so silly, but it sounds silly. 280 00:21:34,763.9161753 --> 00:21:39,273.9161753 Like, cause my scientific mind still wants to, to be very like allopathic. 281 00:21:39,894.9161753 --> 00:21:41,734.9161753 Tell me what you mean by how you use it. 282 00:21:41,734.9161753 --> 00:21:52,693.8161753 Like what do you, when you say use what do you mean by that? So like you plan, you plan your, your work in your life around what is going to be happening to you physically. 283 00:21:52,693.9161753 --> 00:21:57,103.9161753 So like, if you know, you're going to be having more cortisol, that's actually. 284 00:21:57,783.9161753 --> 00:22:00,503.9161753 You know, that's like, you're going to have this extra boost of energy. 285 00:22:00,533.9161753 --> 00:22:05,813.9151753 Cause that's actually kind of what's happening is like your body's taking in the extra radiation, so it has to utilize it. 286 00:22:06,483.9161753 --> 00:22:12,373.9161753 And so your body's going to make more cortisol, um, to be able to handle the extra radiation. 287 00:22:12,993.9161753 --> 00:22:20,113.9161753 So you actually don't have to make, your body doesn't have to make as much cortisol, like from stress. 288 00:22:20,143.9161753 --> 00:22:22,563.9161753 Like, I don't know, like it's not being made from stress. 289 00:22:22,813.9161753 --> 00:22:23,884.9161753 It's Well, that makes sense. 290 00:22:23,884.9161753 --> 00:22:25,594.9161753 Like moon today. 291 00:22:25,973.9161753 --> 00:22:27,703.9161753 right exactly. 292 00:22:28,243.9161753 --> 00:22:36,273.9161753 so you're saying on a full moon we naturally would have more cortisol, which would make us more, well, I mean it's yeah. 293 00:22:37,93.9161753 --> 00:22:37,793.9161753 Exactly. 294 00:22:38,363.9161753 --> 00:22:42,223.9161753 And more and more epinephrine and like, there's a few other, other things. 295 00:22:42,223.9161753 --> 00:22:47,613.9161753 So like acetylcholine, uh, starts to, it's at the peak during the first quarter. 296 00:22:48,63.9161753 --> 00:22:56,673.9161753 Um, and dopamine is at the peak in the third quarter and melanin is at the peak in the new moon and the cortisol is at the peak of the full moon. 297 00:22:56,943.9161753 --> 00:22:59,293.9161753 Serotonin is also at the peak at the full moon. 298 00:22:59,979.9161753 --> 00:23:00,449.9161753 Okay. 299 00:23:00,473.9161753 --> 00:23:02,948.9161753 so when you start, Realizing that. 300 00:23:02,958.9161753 --> 00:23:05,708.8161753 So like, it's rare to actually have cortisol and serotonin. 301 00:23:05,708.9161753 --> 00:23:12,218.9161753 If you think about like what's going on in your body, you wouldn't normally have cortisol and serotonin, you know, at high production levels. 302 00:23:12,558.9151753 --> 00:23:12,938.9151753 Right. 303 00:23:13,59.9161753 --> 00:23:13,409.9161753 Okay. 304 00:23:13,608.9161753 --> 00:23:15,238.9161753 And so, but they are at the full moon. 305 00:23:15,478.9151753 --> 00:23:32,13.9161753 And so if you use that knowing like, okay, I'm going to, Act like I'm going to ovulate on the full moon, and I'm going to support myself as if I'm going to ovulate on the full moon, because it's when you actually get the most energetic support, like literally energetic support. 306 00:23:33,403.9161753 --> 00:23:43,513.9161753 Ideally, when you're healthy, you actually cycle on the new moon, and if you're, If you're not, if you're cycling towards the first quarter, you need more estrogen. 307 00:23:43,553.9161753 --> 00:23:46,553.9161753 And if you're cycling towards the third quarter, you need more dopamine. 308 00:23:47,199.9161753 --> 00:24:02,629.9161753 This, this seems like, like groundbreaking information, Wendy, like, have you, so you use this in your coaching, do you, And that's really amazing because, um, there's a, there's a woman, um, in Australia, but she, she works with women globally. 309 00:24:02,689.9161753 --> 00:24:06,559.9161753 Um, some of your listeners might know her, her name is Jane Hardwick Collins. 310 00:24:06,749.9161753 --> 00:24:08,899.9161753 She she's an Instagram Jane Harwick Collins. 311 00:24:08,909.9161753 --> 00:24:10,259.9161753 she's in her late. 312 00:24:10,539.9161753 --> 00:24:10,909.9161753 60s. 313 00:24:10,949.9161753 --> 00:24:20,529.9161753 I don't know exactly, but she's, she does a lot of work with women around those transitional times, you know, puberty and, um, so men are, and then a matriarch. 314 00:24:20,529.9161753 --> 00:24:24,289.9151753 And then she calls it, um, I forget the forget. 315 00:24:24,539.9161753 --> 00:24:29,579.9161753 She has a word for like the menopausal stage, which she, she says, and I've done some of her workshops online. 316 00:24:29,609.9161753 --> 00:24:38,569.9161753 She says that, After menopause, you still, you, you're, you're more in alignment with the moon than ever before, and you still have the same cycle. 317 00:24:38,569.9161753 --> 00:24:54,849.9161753 Even if you're not bleeding, you still have that cycle of this, the same cycle in terms of your mood and your energy levels that, that, and that you should optimally go into that new moon, full moon, um, cycle where you have your most creative energy on your full moon and et cetera. 318 00:24:55,159.9161753 --> 00:25:03,264.9161753 So, but you're saying that you use that order to facilitate women to start ovulating again or to get their periods back. 319 00:25:03,833.9151753 --> 00:25:04,123.9151753 Yeah. 320 00:25:04,363.9161753 --> 00:25:05,694.9161753 Get them back on fascinating. 321 00:25:05,994.9161753 --> 00:25:06,704.9161753 Yeah. 322 00:25:07,34.9161753 --> 00:25:08,364.9161753 That's fascinating. 323 00:25:08,514.9161753 --> 00:25:09,34.9161753 Yeah. 324 00:25:09,213.9161753 --> 00:25:10,593.9151753 And it's been really interesting. 325 00:25:10,663.9151753 --> 00:25:11,103.9151753 So. 326 00:25:11,773.9161753 --> 00:25:15,133.9161753 Like, there's just so much in your body is like giving you so much information. 327 00:25:15,133.9161753 --> 00:25:20,693.9161753 And so, you know, those studies that say, okay, no women don't cycle on the moon and they do or don't. 328 00:25:20,703.9161753 --> 00:25:28,833.9151753 But if you look at a woman's average cycle is a moon cycle, right? It's still aligned with the moon. 329 00:25:29,523.9151753 --> 00:25:35,983.9161753 And that's because, you know, your body is going to be different than my body, but like, say you're, you're depleting an estrogen. 330 00:25:35,993.9161753 --> 00:25:38,393.9161753 Well, you're going to be cycling around the first quarter all the time. 331 00:25:39,343.9161753 --> 00:25:40,13.9161753 And if you need. 332 00:25:40,318.9161753 --> 00:25:43,448.9161753 If you're really stressed out, you're going to be cycling out the full moon. 333 00:25:43,939.9161753 --> 00:25:44,499.9161753 Yeah. 334 00:25:44,728.9161753 --> 00:25:47,248.9161753 and if you're more balanced, you're gonna be cycling at the New Moon. 335 00:25:47,488.9161753 --> 00:25:54,778.9161753 And if you're a DHD, you're probably around the third moon somewhere between the full and the, the new moon, depending on where you're at. 336 00:25:54,838.9161753 --> 00:25:55,258.9161753 Right. 337 00:25:55,809.9161753 --> 00:25:56,79.9161753 Yeah. 338 00:25:56,158.9161753 --> 00:25:57,358.9161753 Um, 'cause you need the progesterone. 339 00:25:57,418.9161753 --> 00:25:57,778.9161753 Right. 340 00:25:58,213.9161753 --> 00:26:07,638.9161753 And, and it's super, it's just like, I've just been tracking it now for a couple years, like just on my own you know, like going Oh, that's interesting. 341 00:26:07,758.9161753 --> 00:26:29,569.9151753 To to, you know, in conversations think it's I think, I think, um, oh, I'm glad that you have, um, that you work with that actively and I'd love to see, yeah, I mean, it sounds like, um, it sounds like like secret information that no one knows about that we should all know about, you know, Right? It's kind of, so like Yoni women's business. 342 00:26:30,818.9161753 --> 00:26:35,78.9161753 D'Armoring is an ancient, ancient practice. 343 00:26:35,543.9161753 --> 00:26:42,553.9161753 That like people knew that they needed, you know, just like, you know, like, Hey, do you need a massage? Right? Like you're a little stressed. 344 00:26:43,23.9161753 --> 00:26:44,823.9151753 Hey, relax for a minute here. 345 00:26:44,823.9161753 --> 00:26:52,233.9161753 Take care of your, you know, drink this tea for your circulation, right? Like we, we have all of these remedies to help ourselves, but it's like. 346 00:26:52,773.9161753 --> 00:26:57,723.9161753 But over the last, you know, few thousand years, it's like, Oh, you're, you're genitals. 347 00:26:57,793.9161753 --> 00:27:00,174.9161753 No, Yeah, I know. 348 00:27:00,184.9161753 --> 00:27:00,624.9161753 Right. 349 00:27:01,493.9161753 --> 00:27:04,173.9161753 like, no, like we're now going to ignore that entire body part. 350 00:27:04,213.9161753 --> 00:27:04,964.9161753 Like I know. 351 00:27:05,124.9161753 --> 00:27:05,654.9161753 Crazy. 352 00:27:06,164.9161753 --> 00:27:15,164.9156753 Like all of these massive muscle groups that you can only access through, know, genitalia that just also have their contraction and need release. 353 00:27:15,164.9156753 --> 00:27:16,243.9161753 And, you Yeah. 354 00:27:16,963.9151753 --> 00:27:20,984.9161753 And so I, no ads, you can only get to inside the vagina. 355 00:27:21,54.9161753 --> 00:27:23,723.9151753 Like, I know it's crazy, but yeah. 356 00:27:23,833.9161753 --> 00:27:24,443.9161753 exactly. 357 00:27:24,463.9161753 --> 00:27:27,803.9161753 And so, you know, like the moon is kind of like that too. 358 00:27:27,803.9161753 --> 00:27:38,388.9161753 I mean, we can go back through history, you know, Like we can see why this all happened and I don't think anyone agrees that it was a good thing, you know, um, but this is where we're at. 359 00:27:38,418.9151753 --> 00:27:48,728.9161753 And so now it's about getting out and, you know, talking about it and, you know, starting to bridge, like, my goal is trying to start to bridge that gap between like that spirituality. 360 00:27:48,738.9151753 --> 00:27:49,278.9151753 Woo. 361 00:27:49,608.9161753 --> 00:27:52,928.9161753 And the science and be like, actually, there's real science to back this up. 362 00:27:53,258.9161753 --> 00:28:01,518.9161753 So indigenous practices have been using the moon for, you know, since humans have been existence basically. 363 00:28:01,518.9161753 --> 00:28:01,898.9161753 Right. 364 00:28:02,659.9161753 --> 00:28:03,79.9161753 Hmm. 365 00:28:03,148.9161753 --> 00:28:09,79.9161753 And so now there's some science to actually show why these work and that's, Yeah. 366 00:28:09,688.9161753 --> 00:28:11,28.9161753 all right. 367 00:28:11,49.9161753 --> 00:28:11,379.9161753 Yeah. 368 00:28:11,449.9161753 --> 00:28:11,899.9161753 Interesting. 369 00:28:11,909.9161753 --> 00:28:23,214.9161753 Like, I'm, I mean, I'm totally open to, I mean, you know, I, I'm just, um, I'm just totally open to changing my mind or seeing things differently. 370 00:28:23,214.9161753 --> 00:28:31,764.9156753 You know, I had been feeling like I'm glad that the whole period thing is over and I feel so much better than I did six months ago and I'm not having any of those symptoms anymore. 371 00:28:31,764.9156753 --> 00:28:35,204.9156753 I feel really even just even I feel happy. 372 00:28:35,204.9156753 --> 00:28:39,174.9161753 Like, I was getting really depressed as well because of like the whole toll it takes on your brain. 373 00:28:39,174.9161753 --> 00:28:41,124.9161753 And as you say, the dopamine, you know, and. 374 00:28:41,524.9161753 --> 00:28:43,344.9161753 Um, and now I'm feeling great. 375 00:28:43,354.9161753 --> 00:28:46,644.9161753 You know, there are changes like my, like my libido is definitely different. 376 00:28:47,364.9161753 --> 00:28:49,654.9161753 Um, but for me, it's a positive thing. 377 00:28:49,664.9161753 --> 00:28:59,14.9161753 Cause I feel like for a lot of my adult life, my libido has been like super distracting and now it feels like I can harness it just in, in relationship and dynamic and it's. 378 00:28:59,259.9161753 --> 00:29:07,39.9161753 enough and everything was great in that area, but I'm not like going through my day and week being totally distracted all the time by my libido. 379 00:29:07,109.9161753 --> 00:29:09,119.9161753 So, so they're positive development. 380 00:29:09,139.9161753 --> 00:29:14,549.9161753 So I'm not, I'm not certain that I would say, Oh, I want to reverse it or go back to, to bleeding again. 381 00:29:14,579.9151753 --> 00:29:16,409.9151753 Um, I don't know. 382 00:29:16,409.9161753 --> 00:29:18,369.9161753 I feel like I don't even understand it enough. 383 00:29:18,379.9161753 --> 00:29:19,699.9161753 I don't understand what that means. 384 00:29:19,719.9161753 --> 00:29:26,89.9161753 Like maybe, you know, there's a way to, to, to bleed again and not go through that hectic. 385 00:29:26,784.9161753 --> 00:29:32,144.9161753 Precipitous drop in hormones, which causes all these incredible like, yeah. 386 00:29:32,353.9161753 --> 00:29:42,253.9161753 I think so in my research, you know, and trying to, trying to figure out like, okay, what societies is menopause really not a big deal. 387 00:29:42,673.9161753 --> 00:29:42,943.9161753 Right. 388 00:29:42,963.9161753 --> 00:29:44,183.9156753 So there are some, right. 389 00:29:44,183.9156753 --> 00:29:45,893.9161753 Where the women don't struggle. 390 00:29:45,953.9161753 --> 00:29:51,913.9151753 They just, one day they, you know, like, oh yeah, I haven't bled in a long time. 391 00:29:51,933.9161753 --> 00:29:53,123.9161753 I guess I'm menopause, right. 392 00:29:53,123.9161753 --> 00:29:55,903.9161753 You know, it's just a, it's a natural transition. 393 00:29:55,933.9161753 --> 00:30:01,653.9161753 And so I kind of looked into some of, you know, like, is it lifestyle? Is it this? I think there's an element. 394 00:30:03,283.9161753 --> 00:30:09,663.9161753 It's definitely so much about lifestyle and it honestly, so everything in our body is tied to whether you're stressed or not stress. 395 00:30:09,723.9161753 --> 00:30:12,644.9161753 It's, it's ridiculous how simple it is thing. 396 00:30:13,84.9161753 --> 00:30:13,404.9161753 Yeah. 397 00:30:13,593.9161753 --> 00:30:14,634.9161753 you know, Yeah. 398 00:30:14,903.9161753 --> 00:30:16,463.9151753 and it's, it's just. 399 00:30:17,208.9161753 --> 00:30:22,718.9161753 There's kind of only two states of your body and everything else revolves around that. 400 00:30:23,78.9161753 --> 00:30:27,248.9151753 You're either awake or you're not awake and either you're stressed or you're not stressed. 401 00:30:27,878.9161753 --> 00:30:33,968.9161753 And depending on, you know, which of those two levers are on depends on the rest. 402 00:30:34,128.9161753 --> 00:30:35,538.9151753 Everything else depends on that. 403 00:30:36,158.9161753 --> 00:30:42,328.9161753 And once you switch that lever, you know, the, the weight, not awake, you know, we need to go to sleep. 404 00:30:42,358.9161753 --> 00:30:46,88.9161753 We need, you know, most people will keep that lever. 405 00:30:46,618.9161753 --> 00:30:53,88.9161753 You know, going, right? You know, like I know some people have some really drastic sleep problems, but they're really tied to the stress part. 406 00:30:53,528.9161753 --> 00:30:59,178.9161753 Um, but once you start really working with that, I feel safe in my body. 407 00:30:59,488.9161753 --> 00:31:09,164.9161753 What does my body need to feel safe and not necessarily thinking about stress, but just what do I need right now to feel safe? What do I need right now to feel at Yeah. 408 00:31:09,664.9161753 --> 00:31:09,944.9161753 that. 409 00:31:10,484.9161753 --> 00:31:10,954.9161753 Yeah. 410 00:31:11,174.9161753 --> 00:31:12,214.9161753 it back to safety. 411 00:31:12,264.9161753 --> 00:31:13,534.9161753 That's a really great way of doing it. 412 00:31:13,544.9161753 --> 00:31:35,254.9161753 I mean, stress is just, it's, it is the modern disease of our time, isn't it? You know, like it's, it's the number one cause of almost any illness, disease, you know, and our lives, just the way we've created our society with just capitalism and. 413 00:31:35,959.9161753 --> 00:31:37,779.9161753 You know, et cetera, et cetera. 414 00:31:37,829.9161753 --> 00:31:48,189.9151753 It's, it's difficult to see how, um, we can, I mean, we all should be doing things not to be stressed, but the very nature of the world we live in is, is stressful. 415 00:31:48,199.9161753 --> 00:31:59,549.9161753 So it's like, you're constantly having to negotiate with, you know, the status quo and find ways to, to have a little bubble of peace inside a world, which is quite stressful. 416 00:31:59,549.9161753 --> 00:32:06,739.9161753 And I think that's, um, it's such a challenge, isn't it? I mean, you know, I'm you see that in your work a lot. 417 00:32:06,909.9161753 --> 00:32:14,769.9161753 Like I get a lot of clients who are like, how can I, how can I learn to be happy inside of, and then they name the situation, which is so horrible. 418 00:32:14,819.9151753 --> 00:32:23,349.9161753 It's so stressful that you just kind of go, well, you need to get rid of that, you know, but then you understand for a lot of people, there's that part that's non negotiable. 419 00:32:23,349.9161753 --> 00:32:24,749.9161753 Like that's your job. 420 00:32:24,759.9161753 --> 00:32:25,339.9161753 That's your life. 421 00:32:25,339.9161753 --> 00:32:26,19.9161753 That's your marriage. 422 00:32:26,19.9161753 --> 00:32:27,169.9161753 That's your blah, blah, blah. 423 00:32:27,569.9161753 --> 00:32:35,669.9151753 How do I come to some sense of peace and stillness within a situation, which is innately horrible? I don't know that I have an answer for that. 424 00:32:35,669.9161753 --> 00:32:40,48.9161753 What do you say? this is, this is at the heart of the work that I do. 425 00:32:40,659.9161753 --> 00:32:44,338.9161753 Yeah Multipassionate and it's all, it's all tied together. 426 00:32:44,358.9151753 --> 00:32:44,978.9161753 Like all. 427 00:32:45,198.9151753 --> 00:32:56,438.9161753 So for people who are watching, listening, who maybe are new to me or maybe found me in a different Avenue, so I'm an orgasm, neuro pleasure coach, also business coach for sole entrepreneurs with ADHD. 428 00:32:56,888.9161753 --> 00:33:01,168.9161753 Also do psychedelic microdosing, um, and the trauma informed. 429 00:33:01,523.9161753 --> 00:33:01,933.9161753 Coaching. 430 00:33:01,933.9161753 --> 00:33:07,194.9161753 So all those things kind of come together and really, yeah, Multipassionate. 431 00:33:07,234.9161753 --> 00:33:07,584.9161753 Yeah. 432 00:33:07,783.9161753 --> 00:33:11,153.9161753 I'm a multifaceted individual with multifaceted interests. 433 00:33:11,153.9161753 --> 00:33:28,173.9161753 Right? Um, But at the heart of it is this idea of safety and that's something that is super became really, really clear to me a couple of years ago and you know, a little bit of background about my life. 434 00:33:28,183.9161753 --> 00:33:32,83.9151753 Like I have two kids, lots of other people have kids too. 435 00:33:32,93.9161753 --> 00:33:33,823.9161753 My younger son is disabled. 436 00:33:33,843.9161753 --> 00:33:35,303.9161753 Other people have disabled kids too. 437 00:33:35,753.9161753 --> 00:33:38,293.9161753 But anyone who is in that. 438 00:33:38,628.9161753 --> 00:33:43,278.9161753 Knows that just, you know, it gets stressful, just stressful. 439 00:33:43,278.9161753 --> 00:33:44,388.9161753 Sometimes it's just living life. 440 00:33:44,568.9161753 --> 00:33:48,398.9161753 Even if you don't have kids, our life is just, it's just stressful. 441 00:33:49,128.9161753 --> 00:34:08,283.9161753 And because of my circumstances, I didn't necessarily have the time to, you know, go on the retreats and go do spend, you know, hours at the gym, you know, or like a lot of the, you know, an hour meditating or, you know, these different mechanisms that were, you know, Like they're great. 442 00:34:08,293.9161753 --> 00:34:16,463.9161753 They work like they really do work to help you feel better in your body, but they weren't really conducive to my life. 443 00:34:16,973.9161753 --> 00:34:23,233.9151753 So I had to learn how to first, like find these different like kind of tools and tips and tricks. 444 00:34:23,233.9151753 --> 00:34:38,183.9161753 But then what I realized it all boiled down to is kind of getting in the practice of checking in and be like, what do I actually need right now to feel safe? And in that, because it changes from moment to moment, right? Um, you know, sometimes it. 445 00:34:38,653.9161753 --> 00:34:39,863.9161753 I just need to take a breath. 446 00:34:40,373.9161753 --> 00:34:43,723.9161753 Sometimes I just need to be like, okay, I'm gonna put my headphones on. 447 00:34:43,724.0161753 --> 00:34:58,93.9151753 Like, I don't know like what I'm going to need, but like just that, those moments of checking in and stopping and having, you know, that, that dialogue with yourself is a skill that most people didn't have. 448 00:34:58,113.9151753 --> 00:35:03,233.9161753 I didn't have, I sure as hell did not grow up with any internal dialogue. 449 00:35:03,234.0161753 --> 00:35:06,173.9161753 I Checking in is the crazy thing. 450 00:35:06,344.9151753 --> 00:35:06,684.9151753 Yeah. 451 00:35:06,684.9161753 --> 00:35:07,884.9151753 Checking in massive. 452 00:35:07,884.9151753 --> 00:35:08,124.9151753 Yeah. 453 00:35:08,124.9161753 --> 00:35:10,464.9161753 And getting into a habit, as you say, of doing it all the time. 454 00:35:10,644.9161753 --> 00:35:11,74.9161753 Yeah. 455 00:35:11,303.9151753 --> 00:35:11,623.9151753 Yeah. 456 00:35:12,233.9161753 --> 00:35:14,3.9161753 And with that comes. 457 00:35:15,533.9161753 --> 00:35:25,953.9161753 This awareness and practice, like as you keep checking in and as you keep creating safety with yourself, it like builds on each other, you know, like consistently builds. 458 00:35:26,473.9151753 --> 00:35:34,323.9161753 And I do not stress out nearly the way I used to, because I know I can create safety for myself. 459 00:35:34,853.9161753 --> 00:35:40,283.9161753 Like I don't need the external circumstances to change in order to feel good in my body anymore. 460 00:35:40,933.9161753 --> 00:35:42,933.9161753 I know how to make myself feel good in my body. 461 00:35:43,823.9161753 --> 00:35:49,304.9161753 And it's, for me, it's life changing, right? Hmm. 462 00:35:50,84.9161753 --> 00:35:50,414.9161753 Yeah. 463 00:35:50,414.9161753 --> 00:35:52,754.9161753 I mean, that, that's the most important thing. 464 00:35:55,238.9161753 --> 00:36:04,518.9161753 yeah, um, now going kind of back to all this conversation, learning these things, I think has extended my period. 465 00:36:04,978.9161753 --> 00:36:12,878.9151753 Like, I know it's extended my period because you know, according to the doctors, I was going to be, you know, like an early menopause, right. 466 00:36:12,878.9161753 --> 00:36:14,88.9161753 And clearly I'm not. 467 00:36:14,888.9161753 --> 00:36:37,903.9151753 Um, and just even thinking about whether you're in menopause or not, these our bodies still know, like we do still protest, produce estrogen, not just from our ovaries, right? Estrogen is an estrogen testosterone and progesterone are necessary, um, hormones for natural biological processes. 468 00:36:38,223.9151753 --> 00:36:45,183.9151753 And even without your reproductive organs, if you're healthy, well being basically. 469 00:36:45,748.9161753 --> 00:36:58,74.9161753 Safe or not safe stress, not stressed, right? If you are not stressed or you're feeling safe Then your body can produce the necessary hormones to be protective Yes. 470 00:36:58,334.9161753 --> 00:36:58,684.9161753 Yes. 471 00:36:58,974.9161753 --> 00:37:19,154.9161753 And I think that's the key is somehow finding the balance and I would love that to be more kind of the conversation that we're having as women and, and, you know, and in the medical world and the holistic world about menopause is how can we, how can we move into an age in a stage where we still have all the protective benefits of estrogen and. 472 00:37:20,29.9161753 --> 00:37:28,919.9156753 You know, we're healthy, but we also have the benefits of menopause and there are benefits and not just, you know, everyone says, Oh, thank goodness I'm not bleeding, but it's far beyond that. 473 00:37:28,919.9156753 --> 00:37:30,929.9161753 Like your hormonal profile changes. 474 00:37:30,929.9161753 --> 00:37:37,169.9156753 So for example, you're more testosterone dominant and it changes the organization of neural pathways in your brain. 475 00:37:37,169.9156753 --> 00:37:38,499.9161753 There's a book that I've been reading. 476 00:37:38,509.9161753 --> 00:37:41,59.9161753 I'll just name it cause I've got it on my Kindle. 477 00:37:42,189.9161753 --> 00:37:44,9.9161753 Um, and. 478 00:37:44,519.9161753 --> 00:37:45,979.9161753 It's called the menopause brain. 479 00:37:45,979.9161753 --> 00:37:47,29.9161753 You've probably heard of it. 480 00:37:47,30.0161753 --> 00:37:56,759.9161753 It's, I think it's a bestseller, the menopause brain by Lisa Mosconi, Lisa Mosconi, and it talks a lot about how the brain changes and there are lots of positive things. 481 00:37:56,799.9161753 --> 00:38:03,949.9161753 Like, like women, she, she uses this language of women are more in control of their emotions, which I really like that makes my body constricts. 482 00:38:03,979.9161753 --> 00:38:05,149.9161753 Like, I don't like this idea. 483 00:38:05,159.9161753 --> 00:38:19,879.9161753 Like the control of emotions is a good thing, but I think reading behind the, the languaging of it, you know, there's, is a more of a, distance between reactivity and that like awareness of what's actually happening. 484 00:38:19,879.9161753 --> 00:38:21,59.9161753 And I think that's really helpful. 485 00:38:21,69.9161753 --> 00:38:22,409.9161753 And I can see that in myself. 486 00:38:22,409.9161753 --> 00:38:28,19.9161753 I'm a must, a much less likely to be lost in my own reactions and more likely to go hang on. 487 00:38:28,19.9161753 --> 00:38:31,769.9156753 Like what's actually happening here, which is different from repressing it. 488 00:38:31,769.9156753 --> 00:38:32,759.9156753 I'm still feeling it. 489 00:38:32,759.9156753 --> 00:38:39,399.9161753 And you know, like, you know, like when you work with trauma, you know, like number one, real, don't repress your feelings, so there are benefits. 490 00:38:39,409.9161753 --> 00:38:42,379.9161753 So yeah, like, I'd love to have that conversation more. 491 00:38:42,719.9161753 --> 00:38:44,539.9161753 See that out there in the public space going forward. 492 00:38:44,539.9161753 --> 00:38:52,889.9161753 How can we into this stage and still have all the benefits of menopause, which are, you know, and some people say menopausal women should rule the world. 493 00:38:52,889.9161753 --> 00:39:07,689.9161753 And Lisa Moscone makes a good case for that because of the brain chemistry and what, how there's this combination of nurturing and emotional availability, but also this dispassionate aspect of being able to see things how they are and make decisions for the collective. 494 00:39:07,729.9161753 --> 00:39:09,639.9161753 That's one of the things she really emphasizes like. 495 00:39:09,939.9161753 --> 00:39:23,869.9161753 Women able to make decisions for the good of all, and not just in a more hyper masculine way of being like, this is, I'm just driven towards success and domination, which is by the way, obviously different from males. 496 00:39:23,969.9161753 --> 00:39:29,129.9156753 It's more of a archetypal, you know, um, pattern that hyper masculine. 497 00:39:29,129.9156753 --> 00:39:32,929.9161753 So, so, and I feel like I'm coming into that, I'm finding it, but I'm. 498 00:39:33,174.9161753 --> 00:39:36,494.9161753 Totally interested in any of the research around how, how that happens. 499 00:39:36,494.9161753 --> 00:39:36,944.9161753 Cause you're right. 500 00:39:36,944.9161753 --> 00:39:38,504.9161753 We never stopped making estrogen. 501 00:39:38,514.9161753 --> 00:39:40,854.9161753 Like we'll have it till the day we die. 502 00:39:40,864.9161753 --> 00:39:42,544.9151753 It's not like you lose it completely. 503 00:39:42,544.9161753 --> 00:39:44,544.9161753 It's just the combinations change. 504 00:39:44,554.9151753 --> 00:39:46,88.9151753 And Right. 505 00:39:46,168.9161753 --> 00:39:47,64.9161753 So anymore. 506 00:39:47,758.9161753 --> 00:40:04,28.9161753 going back to that stress cycle, right? If you are making too much cortisol You're using your testosterone to start the fight The removal of the cortisol, which then turns into the form of the toxic form of estrogen that I don't remember exactly the name for. 507 00:40:04,484.9151753 --> 00:40:04,704.9151753 yeah. 508 00:40:05,428.9151753 --> 00:40:07,658.9161753 Um, and so then your body's not making as much. 509 00:40:08,93.9161753 --> 00:40:12,73.9161753 estrogen, and now you don't have the reproductive organs to pull from. 510 00:40:12,553.9161753 --> 00:40:14,613.9161753 And so that's where the health concerns come from. 511 00:40:14,943.9161753 --> 00:40:16,953.9151753 It's not that you're in menopause. 512 00:40:19,363.9161753 --> 00:40:44,173.9161753 It is the fact that you, if you are still making more cortisol, if you're not working with your cortisol production and understanding your cortisol production and working with the balance of your body, Cause I, the reason I'm bringing that up in particular, because when you go into menopause, you now shift into the same cortisol production cycles that males do, which is a 24 hour cycle. 513 00:40:44,653.9161753 --> 00:40:51,304.9156753 But even though you're on that 24 hour cycle, it's still impacted by the moon, right? So Yeah. 514 00:40:51,304.9156753 --> 00:40:54,348.9161753 I was about to say it comes back to the moon, doesn't it? Yeah. 515 00:40:54,858.9161753 --> 00:41:09,608.9161753 And so understanding that just because you had a good week last week and trying to do this and that, like, this is the productive society model that is not very beneficial for society at whole. 516 00:41:09,988.9161753 --> 00:41:23,298.9161753 We will have good days and bad days while we're, especially as women, we can't, it's a little bit difficult to find the rhythm sometimes when you're trying to kind of fit yourself into a masculine model of cortisol production. 517 00:41:24,143.9161753 --> 00:41:24,523.9161753 Right. 518 00:41:25,223.9161753 --> 00:41:29,703.9161753 Where they can wake up in the morning and it's like a new cycle again. 519 00:41:29,703.9161753 --> 00:41:37,983.9161753 So instead of them having the monthly menstrual cycle guiding their hormones, it's every day, right? But there's still the moon in front. 520 00:41:37,983.9161753 --> 00:41:38,903.9151753 It's just as a reminder. 521 00:41:39,363.9161753 --> 00:41:42,433.9151753 And so if you're trying to fit into that. 522 00:41:43,108.9161753 --> 00:41:46,68.9161753 That same like reset cycle every single day. 523 00:41:46,68.9161753 --> 00:41:55,348.9161753 And you're trying to construct your, your days with this idea that tomorrow is going to be the same as it was today, which is the same as yesterday. 524 00:41:55,588.9161753 --> 00:41:56,638.9161753 That's absolutely not true. 525 00:41:58,54.9161753 --> 00:42:09,728.9161753 yeah, And so where I think the idea, like women in menopause have an advantage is that we still understand whether or not we even realize it. 526 00:42:09,738.9161753 --> 00:42:13,938.9161753 We still understand the cycle of the moon because we've been living it our whole life. 527 00:42:13,938.9161753 --> 00:42:13,968.9161753 Yeah. 528 00:42:14,358.9161753 --> 00:42:14,778.9161753 Right. 529 00:42:15,88.9161753 --> 00:42:24,518.9161753 And so we can actually flow into the natural rhythm of the earth and find our rhythm easier than men because they're never, they're not taught how to work with the cycle. 530 00:42:24,788.9151753 --> 00:42:26,128.9161753 They're not taught how to do this. 531 00:42:26,418.9161753 --> 00:42:33,928.9161753 We've lost the traditions of the indigenous traditions that with the moon that they would have had naturally learned. 532 00:42:34,268.9161753 --> 00:42:49,868.9161753 Through their life growing up, you know, like they would experience the different cycles and when the months were when the things were, you know, you do certain things at the full moon because that's what the full moon provides that animals are out and about. 533 00:42:49,868.9161753 --> 00:42:51,128.9161753 And so you can do night hunts. 534 00:42:51,258.9161753 --> 00:42:54,818.9161753 You don't do that on a new moon because the animals are hyper are hiding. 535 00:42:54,828.9161753 --> 00:42:59,128.9161753 So you would never go out on a new moon and you would know that if you grew up in that. 536 00:42:59,548.9161753 --> 00:42:59,958.9161753 Right. 537 00:43:00,228.9161753 --> 00:43:06,468.9161753 And you would know that for yourself, you would know that you would want to be back at camp at home with your family. 538 00:43:07,524.9161753 --> 00:43:09,114.9161753 yeah, I, I love this. 539 00:43:09,144.9161753 --> 00:43:11,374.9161753 This really inspires me actually to pay more. 540 00:43:11,384.9151753 --> 00:43:15,74.9151753 I mean, I have been told, like, I guess I need to be told things a few times. 541 00:43:15,74.9161753 --> 00:43:18,894.9161753 Like most humans I have been told, like, you know, get into the cycle of the moon. 542 00:43:18,914.9161753 --> 00:43:24,494.9161753 I know Jane Hardwick Collins says that a lot, but I'm very inspired now with this conversation to go actually sit down. 543 00:43:24,734.9161753 --> 00:43:26,354.9161753 I mean, I know today is a full moon. 544 00:43:28,64.9161753 --> 00:43:28,914.9161753 Yeah, but. 545 00:43:29,468.9161753 --> 00:43:29,738.9161753 Yeah. 546 00:43:29,738.9161753 --> 00:43:38,708.9161753 And so start, you know, start, I, I, this is how I would suggest, you know, start with a full moon practice and a new moon practice. 547 00:43:38,988.9161753 --> 00:43:42,28.9161753 Like find one that resonates for you for a full moon practice. 548 00:43:42,28.9161753 --> 00:43:45,68.9161753 There's so many, like, there's so many beautiful practices. 549 00:43:45,78.9161753 --> 00:43:56,28.9151753 Like so many amazing women, witchy women have been like, you know, discovering and sharing and transforming and adapting, you know, these different traditions and you'll find one. 550 00:43:56,28.9151753 --> 00:44:06,518.9151753 So whether or not, you know, you've got ancestral roots that you feel called to, or, you know, you're, you just really like a different tradition, you know, because you feel drawn to it, you know, whatever. 551 00:44:06,763.9161753 --> 00:44:15,73.9161753 Go with like, what feels good, find the, find a full moon to start practicing with and find a new moon to start practicing, practicing with. 552 00:44:15,293.9161753 --> 00:44:19,103.9161753 And you'll, and make them be different, you know, make sure that they're different things. 553 00:44:19,343.9151753 --> 00:44:24,53.9151753 Cause you'll start noticing what shows up around the full moon and you'll start noticing what shows up around the new moon. 554 00:44:24,293.9161753 --> 00:44:34,913.9161753 It's just the easiest way to start noticing your own rhythm without it having to be like this hard, you know, like, Oh, what am I going to do to keep track of everything? And right. 555 00:44:36,194.9161753 --> 00:44:36,554.9161753 Yeah. 556 00:44:36,594.9161753 --> 00:44:43,24.9161753 So for the full moon, so the energy is more like, I get that it's higher and more energy, but it's, I always get confused. 557 00:44:43,24.9161753 --> 00:44:47,264.9161753 Like, so you plant the seeds on the new moon, you plant the seeds of new desires. 558 00:44:47,304.9151753 --> 00:44:51,924.9161753 And I understand that on the full moon, it's supposed to be like, kind of like reaping what you sow. 559 00:44:51,954.9161753 --> 00:44:54,748.8161753 But I don't understand practically what that You know, it's. 560 00:44:54,854.9161753 --> 00:44:55,54.9161753 ritual. 561 00:44:56,58.9161753 --> 00:45:09,758.9161753 So what's interesting, you plant the seeds for outward growth on the new moon and you plant the seeds for grounded growth at the full moon. 562 00:45:10,408.9161753 --> 00:45:13,558.9161753 So root, like if you were actually to do a garden and plant a garden. 563 00:45:13,768.9161753 --> 00:45:18,768.9161753 So if you're planning crops that grow up that you're going to be harvesting, you plant on the new moon. 564 00:45:19,488.9161753 --> 00:45:21,618.9161753 So that way it grows up towards the full moon. 565 00:45:22,18.9161753 --> 00:45:27,188.9161753 If you're doing root vegetables or things that actually go from the ground, you plant on the full moon. 566 00:45:27,908.9161753 --> 00:45:29,784.9161753 So do you? That's interesting. 567 00:45:29,794.9161753 --> 00:45:30,194.9161753 Okay. 568 00:45:30,304.9161753 --> 00:45:36,928.9161753 So mean in terms of like goals? So on the you're going to be more like working All right. 569 00:45:36,938.9161753 --> 00:45:42,244.9151753 So I'm gonna Yeah, I'm going to start with the new moon and we're going to go around so that way Okay. 570 00:45:42,574.9161753 --> 00:45:42,804.9156753 Yeah. 571 00:45:42,804.9156753 --> 00:45:43,314.9151753 I love it. 572 00:45:43,344.9151753 --> 00:45:43,594.9151753 Yeah. 573 00:45:43,634.9151753 --> 00:45:44,244.9151753 Let's do it. 574 00:45:44,684.9151753 --> 00:45:45,84.9151753 Yeah. 575 00:45:45,608.9161753 --> 00:46:00,833.9161753 All right, so on the new moon, I'd like to pick a theme for the month, you know Ideally to make it easier At least I find it easier to follow the zodiac sign like where the Sun is or the moon it you know like that Just, just pick that. 576 00:46:01,343.9161753 --> 00:46:02,63.9161753 It's just easier. 577 00:46:02,353.9161753 --> 00:46:07,363.9161753 Like, cause then you're, you can, you can find so many different resources, you know, to follow along. 578 00:46:07,823.9151753 --> 00:46:17,93.9151753 Um, and so you pick the theme, you know, kind of for what you want to, what you want to kind of bring into fruition and focus on and what is happening then. 579 00:46:17,143.9161753 --> 00:46:26,468.9161753 And so it's the darkness, it's all kind of like, you're going to be introspective, like really noticing what's, What's internally, right? Like you're, you're internal. 580 00:46:27,628.9161753 --> 00:46:36,968.9161753 And then as they're starting to be light, you're going to start noticing the behaviors and the things that maybe you want to change and shift. 581 00:46:37,568.9161753 --> 00:46:42,888.9151753 And as you get the full moon, you're going to have an awareness of the things that are not working for you. 582 00:46:43,398.9151753 --> 00:46:43,728.9151753 Right. 583 00:46:43,888.9161753 --> 00:46:46,458.9161753 But also you're going to have an awareness of the things that are working for you. 584 00:46:46,488.9161753 --> 00:46:49,28.9161753 It just sheds light on whatever the situation is. 585 00:46:49,983.9161753 --> 00:46:58,838.9161753 And so, ideally, this is rinacetylcholine, is, is that, it's, I, it, At a peak is at the first quarter and this is when you learn. 586 00:46:59,108.9161753 --> 00:47:08,608.9151753 So like if you are, you're, you're going to want to be practicing and learning and creating the new habits that are going to support whatever your, your goal is. 587 00:47:09,168.9161753 --> 00:47:09,558.9161753 Right. 588 00:47:10,108.9161753 --> 00:47:16,818.9161753 And then as you move over into the full moon, this is when you're really practicing them and like solidifying them. 589 00:47:17,468.9161753 --> 00:47:17,908.9161753 And then. 590 00:47:18,423.9161753 --> 00:47:24,593.9161753 As you start to shift into the third quarter, this is actually when, uh, so you're at high cortisol right here. 591 00:47:24,593.9161753 --> 00:47:32,523.9156753 So it is a little more like you've got energy and you've got more like, but it's also in serotonins there, but that starts to go down. 592 00:47:32,523.9156753 --> 00:47:34,143.9156753 So your serotonin starts to go down. 593 00:47:34,143.9156753 --> 00:47:36,83.9161753 So there's a little bit of like. 594 00:47:36,413.9161753 --> 00:47:42,63.9161753 An easiness that starts to creep in a little bit and it's also because you're coming into balance. 595 00:47:42,313.9161753 --> 00:47:48,643.9161753 So at first quarter and third quarter, you're in balance and most people's nervous system is not balanced and they will notice it. 596 00:47:49,103.9161753 --> 00:48:02,33.9161753 And so your nervous system wants to be the most balanced at first quarter and third quarter, right? And when it's not like whatever your dysregulation is, your body's going to try to get to that equilibrium. 597 00:48:02,33.9161753 --> 00:48:13,453.9161753 So this is when you're, especially on the third quarter, this is when your bad habits are going to be totally In full effect, right? And this is why the moon also gives you that extra dopamine boost. 598 00:48:13,893.9161753 --> 00:48:18,903.8161753 So that way you can actually have a little more focus on the things that you actually want to do. 599 00:48:19,363.9161753 --> 00:48:19,683.9161753 Right. 600 00:48:19,683.9161753 --> 00:48:27,53.9161753 You can be aware of the bad habits that are trying to creep in and actually maybe be a little more targeted with what you're doing. 601 00:48:27,783.9161753 --> 00:48:31,53.9161753 It's interesting how the moon completely supports you through this whole process. 602 00:48:31,429.9161753 --> 00:48:32,969.9161753 I love, I love this so much. 603 00:48:32,969.9161753 --> 00:48:35,129.9161753 I need it to be in a workbook format. 604 00:48:35,309.9161753 --> 00:48:39,379.9156753 I don't know if you have one, but I need a workbook that I can like work with. 605 00:48:39,379.9156753 --> 00:48:49,784.9161753 And I tell you why, you know, like since being so menopausal, I've noticed, you know, there Popular right now to have like period coaches and to work with your menstrual cycle. 606 00:48:49,784.9161753 --> 00:48:55,34.9161753 And kind of, it makes me feel like, Oh, like that time of my life has passed. 607 00:48:55,114.9161753 --> 00:48:58,264.9151753 Like I can't work with my menstrual cycle anymore. 608 00:48:58,274.9151753 --> 00:48:58,874.9161753 Oh my gosh. 609 00:48:58,874.9161753 --> 00:49:01,913.9161753 You know, my daughter can Yeah. 610 00:49:02,104.9151753 --> 00:49:03,994.9161753 great for her, you know, she's 18. 611 00:49:04,414.9151753 --> 00:49:07,594.9161753 But, um, but now I'm feeling like I can. 612 00:49:07,984.9161753 --> 00:49:09,54.9161753 I can work with the moon. 613 00:49:09,214.9161753 --> 00:49:11,714.9161753 So I, I like, I feel like we really need this Wendy. 614 00:49:11,724.9161753 --> 00:49:22,234.9161753 Like I really need a workbook just focused on like working with the moon cycles, whether or not you're, you know, still menstruating or not. 615 00:49:22,234.9161753 --> 00:49:24,924.9151753 Like either way it works because, um. 616 00:49:25,344.9161753 --> 00:49:25,774.9161753 Yeah. 617 00:49:25,784.9161753 --> 00:49:27,184.9161753 Like it, it totally makes sense. 618 00:49:27,184.9161753 --> 00:49:36,424.9161753 I really liked the idea of how it's as the moon is, I guess, waxing it, shining the light on what works and what doesn't work and probably around the full moon. 619 00:49:36,424.9161753 --> 00:49:38,794.9151753 You're making some, some big decisions around that. 620 00:49:38,794.9161753 --> 00:49:44,54.9161753 Like, it's funny because like this morning I woke up and I was like, you know what, I've got an ad for a particular thing. 621 00:49:44,54.9161753 --> 00:49:45,294.9161753 I'm like, kill the ad. 622 00:49:45,304.9161753 --> 00:49:46,24.9161753 It's not working. 623 00:49:46,414.9161753 --> 00:49:48,584.9161753 And I emailed my digital marketing guy. 624 00:49:48,584.9161753 --> 00:49:52,754.9151753 I'm like, I've been thinking about it overnight and I'm like, just kill that ad for me. 625 00:49:52,754.9161753 --> 00:49:53,794.9161753 Let's focus on this. 626 00:49:53,854.9151753 --> 00:49:56,999.9161753 Let's, you know, um, And that makes so much sense. 627 00:49:58,223.9151753 --> 00:49:59,236.3661753 This is what I would say. 628 00:49:59,236.3661753 --> 00:49:59,403.8161753 Like. 629 00:50:00,13.9161753 --> 00:50:00,813.9161753 This is what I was saying. 630 00:50:00,813.9161753 --> 00:50:02,893.9161753 Like there was certain pattern that I saw. 631 00:50:02,893.9161753 --> 00:50:05,563.9161753 And like, it wasn't just the women that were cycling. 632 00:50:05,573.9161753 --> 00:50:07,413.9161753 It was like, the men were doing this too. 633 00:50:07,703.9161753 --> 00:50:08,393.9161753 And it was consistent. 634 00:50:08,913.9161753 --> 00:50:14,143.8161753 And I'm like, Okay. 635 00:50:14,349.9161753 --> 00:50:16,859.9161753 this because I think that we all need this. 636 00:50:16,869.9161753 --> 00:50:19,129.9161753 Like I need it and we all need it. 637 00:50:19,139.9161753 --> 00:50:23,369.9151753 And, um, yes, you, you need to create like, All yeah. 638 00:50:23,519.9151753 --> 00:50:23,899.9151753 Yeah. 639 00:50:24,149.9161753 --> 00:50:24,953.9161753 I love right. 640 00:50:25,393.9151753 --> 00:50:26,69.9161753 Well, need it. 641 00:50:26,389.9161753 --> 00:50:26,699.9161753 Yeah. 642 00:50:27,923.9151753 --> 00:50:29,623.9161753 um, yes. 643 00:50:30,273.9161753 --> 00:50:34,3.9161753 And I think like, for me, Yeah, I'm going to do this. 644 00:50:36,13.9161753 --> 00:50:48,413.9151753 I'm like, I actually really do want to focus on the menopause book because there are certain things that should be the focus that we pay attention to that maybe we're not setting aside the time. 645 00:50:48,413.9151753 --> 00:50:53,3.9161753 Cause we don't even necessarily know how to focus on the things we need to focus on. 646 00:50:53,113.9161753 --> 00:50:55,144.9161753 So I like Yeah. 647 00:50:55,384.9161753 --> 00:50:58,294.9161753 And I mean, maybe it's something, I mean, it probably would appeal to all women. 648 00:50:58,294.9161753 --> 00:51:10,604.9161753 I mean, maybe particularly women who like are entrepreneurs who have their own business because much more in our cycle because we're kind of more dictating our hours and, and like how the movement is. 649 00:51:10,654.9151753 --> 00:51:15,944.9161753 So, but I mean, it'd be helpful for, for everyone, but I think me especially, I'm feeling that. 650 00:51:16,64.9161753 --> 00:51:16,394.9161753 Yeah. 651 00:51:16,478.9161753 --> 00:51:21,338.9161753 It's so interesting when you said that it like triggered something that I remembered I wanted to say earlier. 652 00:51:21,608.9161753 --> 00:51:27,298.9161753 I have this client who he's in his mid seventies, late seventies, somewhere around there. 653 00:51:27,698.9161753 --> 00:51:38,368.9161753 And we were recently having a conversation and I was saying something, he's like, Wendy, he's like, let me tell you between 50 and 70 is the most creative years. 654 00:51:39,33.9161753 --> 00:51:45,823.9161753 He's like, you've got all this wisdom and you, you, you kind of just don't care what other people think. 655 00:51:46,113.9161753 --> 00:51:51,613.9161753 You know what you're doing to some extent, like you're just, you're not just constantly seeking approval. 656 00:51:51,863.9151753 --> 00:51:55,553.9151753 He's like, I mean, yeah, to open up and create. 657 00:51:56,203.9151753 --> 00:51:57,533.9151753 And I have been sitting with that. 658 00:51:57,533.9151753 --> 00:52:03,513.9161753 I'm like, God, what if, what if that was just the message for menopause? Like, look at now. 659 00:52:03,624.9161753 --> 00:52:04,64.9161753 so much. 660 00:52:04,394.9161753 --> 00:52:06,954.9161753 I mean, you must feel, I totally feel that way. 661 00:52:06,974.9161753 --> 00:52:09,664.9161753 And I mean, I'm just about to hit my 50th birthday. 662 00:52:09,664.9161753 --> 00:52:10,664.9151753 I'm super excited. 663 00:52:10,674.9151753 --> 00:52:17,124.9161753 I, you know what, Jane Hardwick Collins is menopause, what, whatever female cycle, I don't know what she calls herself expert. 664 00:52:17,384.9161753 --> 00:52:20,654.9161753 She calls estrogen, the hormone of accommodation. 665 00:52:20,994.9161753 --> 00:52:24,24.9161753 And she says, one of the signs that you're going through it is all the things. 666 00:52:24,829.9161753 --> 00:52:28,989.9161753 you know, estrogen helps you accommodate whether you're, whether you, and it helps you nurture. 667 00:52:28,989.9161753 --> 00:52:32,489.9161753 It's like the hormone where you're nurturing, you're planting seeds, you're nurturing your career. 668 00:52:32,729.9161753 --> 00:52:41,139.9151753 You're nurturing your children, but you know, as a female body, as you know, you're creating this estrogen, it's like giving you this urge to like, to nurture. 669 00:52:41,139.9161753 --> 00:52:48,29.9161753 And once that starts to drop in your testosterone is more relatively, you know, high, you kind of wake up. 670 00:52:48,59.9161753 --> 00:52:50,449.9161753 She describes it from this fog and go like. 671 00:52:51,54.9161753 --> 00:52:52,414.9161753 I don't have time for this. 672 00:52:52,674.9161753 --> 00:52:57,834.9161753 You know, like, why am I doing all the work? And that is a hundred percent, like a thousand percent of my experience. 673 00:52:57,834.9161753 --> 00:53:02,714.9161753 And I mean, partly, you know, I've got three kids, two are adults, but I've got three stepchildren. 674 00:53:02,724.9161753 --> 00:53:09,804.9161753 There are a lot of kids around me and my, my, I've said so many times to my partner, I am not available for more housework and shopping and cooking. 675 00:53:10,54.9161753 --> 00:53:10,814.9161753 I'm not available. 676 00:53:12,314.9161753 --> 00:53:24,64.9161753 Like, I am obviously in some circumstances to help out, but just generally my, my whole body is saying like, um, I am really available to myself right now and my needs are the most important thing. 677 00:53:24,74.9161753 --> 00:53:28,314.9151753 My health, my wellbeing, my career there, there I've already grown my children. 678 00:53:28,334.9151753 --> 00:53:34,74.9151753 I'm like completely about me and I'm just not available to looking after other people as much. 679 00:53:34,234.9161753 --> 00:53:37,424.9161753 Um, I love that the hormone of accommodation. 680 00:53:37,490.0161753 --> 00:53:38,94.9911753 Yeah. 681 00:53:38,293.9161753 --> 00:53:38,828.8161753 you know, it's. 682 00:53:39,468.9161753 --> 00:53:44,508.9161753 Kind of like tying, I'm like a, I love this conversation by the way, so much. 683 00:53:45,408.9161753 --> 00:53:54,318.9161753 Um, just thinking about why women, like menopausal women really should be more prominent if you think about it. 684 00:53:54,318.9161753 --> 00:54:06,468.9161753 So now we're maybe we're not quite as accommodating, but we are still producing estrogen and now we have all the experience of being. 685 00:54:07,78.9161753 --> 00:54:25,338.9151753 Nurturing of being we have the practice so we don't have to develop these new ways of being we already just are there an essence of our being and now we get to get on that more societal productive cycle of the 24 hour period. 686 00:54:25,998.9161753 --> 00:54:46,218.9161753 And if you learn how to work with the moon and that together, like, you know, And if you're taking a menopausal woman who is doing those practices to create safety in her body, she's not going to be as stressed, which means she's going to have more estrogen available to be accommodating in a kind and loving way. 687 00:54:47,18.9161753 --> 00:54:59,799.9161753 Without that other kind of signaling to like take care of everyone and neglect herself, right? Like it's going to be a more balanced estrogen, right? the martyrdom. 688 00:54:59,849.9161753 --> 00:55:00,989.9161753 You the martyrdom. 689 00:55:00,999.9161753 --> 00:55:01,489.9161753 I think. 690 00:55:01,489.9161753 --> 00:55:01,679.9161753 Yeah. 691 00:55:01,679.9161753 --> 00:55:06,729.9151753 And that's also another thing that happened for me is like, there's this anger that came out of nowhere. 692 00:55:06,729.9161753 --> 00:55:11,9.9151753 Like I had this period where I was so angry, I'd have to like take myself out of the house. 693 00:55:11,9.9161753 --> 00:55:13,529.9151753 You know, anger has never been my keynote emotion. 694 00:55:13,739.9161753 --> 00:55:24,949.9161753 Like I feel like we all tend to have our keynote emotion, like our go to, you know, and for me it was more like, uh, Maybe self pity and tears and, you know, poor me and all of that, like that was more of my comfort zone. 695 00:55:25,199.9161753 --> 00:55:30,209.9156753 And so when anger came up, I was like, what do I do with this beast? It's like, it's just deadly. 696 00:55:30,209.9156753 --> 00:55:31,529.9151753 It's just coming out of me. 697 00:55:31,539.9151753 --> 00:55:36,199.9156753 And it was, it was that part of me that was like, I'm done with accommodating others. 698 00:55:36,199.9156753 --> 00:55:44,269.9161753 Like I need to have the boundary and put myself first, but the way that it came out was like, This anger, which I had to learn how to manage. 699 00:55:44,269.9161753 --> 00:55:57,689.9161753 And, um, so there were, happened over a period of a couple years and it was just like every few months I'd have a little period of like intense anger and then it would, know, but, um, learned a lot from that anger actually. 700 00:55:59,338.9161753 --> 00:56:03,308.9151753 Um, yeah, all of our emotions are super important and happy. 701 00:56:03,308.9161753 --> 00:56:15,48.9161753 I mean, they have, they have a place and they're, they're, the more I understand about how it kind of all works, like our body's always. 702 00:56:15,543.9161753 --> 00:56:18,563.9161753 Talking to us in a beautiful, like it's a beautiful way. 703 00:56:18,963.9161753 --> 00:56:24,583.9161753 Um, you know, we have our mind and we have our body and they don't speak the same. 704 00:56:25,258.9161753 --> 00:56:39,58.9151753 Language like the operating system of the body is different than the operating system of the mind, but emotions are the way that the body communicates with the mind and it's not, it's not a, it's not a judgmental thing. 705 00:56:39,328.9151753 --> 00:56:41,988.9151753 It's a, Hey, this is what's happening in my body. 706 00:56:42,608.9161753 --> 00:56:52,488.9161753 And once you learn how to allow that, you know, to, to be present with that and also simultaneously not get too trapped. 707 00:56:52,953.9161753 --> 00:57:00,193.9161753 In it, right? Because it's just, it's just your body saying, Hey, this is, this is what's happening and needs attention. 708 00:57:00,583.9161753 --> 00:57:01,533.9161753 Please address it. 709 00:57:02,213.9161753 --> 00:57:05,23.9161753 Not I'm going to be this way forever. 710 00:57:06,413.9161753 --> 00:57:07,613.9161753 Right? Cause I see that. 711 00:57:08,123.9161753 --> 00:57:23,23.9161753 I see this a lot with all for the anger thing, all for the leaning into your sadness, all for the leaning into whatever emotion you're experiencing, but there's, but it's, you're not meant to live there. 712 00:57:23,143.9161753 --> 00:57:24,819.9161753 All of these emotions are supposed Absolutely. 713 00:57:24,819.9161753 --> 00:57:25,159.9161753 Yeah. 714 00:57:25,219.9161753 --> 00:57:25,589.9161753 Yeah. 715 00:57:25,689.9161753 --> 00:57:26,19.9161753 Yeah. 716 00:57:26,19.9161753 --> 00:57:35,619.9151753 Emotions are like, I, I see them like, they're like, you know, storms or clouds moving through the sky, you know, you have to like be in it while it's happening, but let it go. 717 00:57:35,619.9161753 --> 00:57:36,519.9151753 It's meant to pass. 718 00:57:36,539.9161753 --> 00:57:38,19.9161753 Like, you know, you'll get bored of it. 719 00:57:38,59.9161753 --> 00:57:39,339.9151753 You know, you're not, yeah. 720 00:57:39,339.9161753 --> 00:57:42,349.9161753 As you say, you're not meant to be in it enough all time. 721 00:57:42,529.9161753 --> 00:57:42,819.9161753 Rather. 722 00:57:42,949.9161753 --> 00:57:43,289.9161753 Yeah. 723 00:57:43,289.9161753 --> 00:57:45,199.9161753 I mean, what I see as well. 724 00:57:45,259.9161753 --> 00:57:45,674.8161753 Like, yeah. 725 00:57:46,334.9161753 --> 00:57:49,974.9161753 terms of like emotions and feelings and being with them. 726 00:57:49,984.9161753 --> 00:57:58,624.9161753 The thing that I see the most often the piece that's missing and my clients is that compassion for self, like. 727 00:58:00,144.9161753 --> 00:58:06,174.9161753 It's just being able to hold yourself as you would hold a small child and really be compassionate. 728 00:58:06,174.9161753 --> 00:58:09,24.9161753 And so I see people who've done heaps of work. 729 00:58:09,34.9161753 --> 00:58:10,264.9161753 They're super self aware. 730 00:58:10,274.9161753 --> 00:58:17,404.9161753 They might even be comfortable being uncomfortable, comfortable holding or expressing or moving through those feelings. 731 00:58:17,484.9151753 --> 00:58:24,94.9161753 But what they're not able to do is just take a moment and extend that compassion for self and really. 732 00:58:24,469.9161753 --> 00:58:28,209.9161753 Just, you know, be there for themselves. 733 00:58:28,249.9161753 --> 00:58:36,9.9161753 And that to me is the most transformative piece of the whole like somatic awareness, emotional processing thing is to be compassionate. 734 00:58:36,19.9161753 --> 00:58:42,19.9151753 And I think, um, fortunately I'd learned that before going through this hormonal transition. 735 00:58:42,59.9161753 --> 00:58:43,459.9161753 So I didn't. 736 00:58:44,89.9161753 --> 00:58:51,859.9161753 judge myself too harshly for when I felt, you know, out of control with my emotions or anger or reactions, I was able to do it. 737 00:58:51,859.9161753 --> 00:58:56,209.9161753 And I think that's a huge difference, you know, to how I'm feeling now. 738 00:58:56,629.9151753 --> 00:58:59,19.9161753 Um, but yeah, it's important. 739 00:58:59,563.9161753 --> 00:59:00,723.9161753 Yeah, I agree. 740 00:59:00,743.9161753 --> 00:59:11,673.9161753 That's a, that's definitely one of the, the, pillars or, you know, I don't call them pillars, but it's just, it's definitely one of the components of what I, what I work with people too. 741 00:59:11,673.9161753 --> 00:59:14,463.9161753 I think it is an often missing, missing piece. 742 00:59:14,853.9161753 --> 00:59:15,313.9161753 Right. 743 00:59:15,803.9161753 --> 00:59:19,843.9151753 Um, especially my, my, somatic practitioner. 744 00:59:21,693.9161753 --> 00:59:26,653.9161753 Sometimes they have some of the worst self talk, like the people who do so much work. 745 00:59:28,134.9161753 --> 00:59:30,434.9161753 Yeah, that's an interesting observation. 746 00:59:30,654.9161753 --> 00:59:33,314.9161753 I mean, I think we can get caught up in the nervous system. 747 00:59:33,314.9161753 --> 00:59:47,674.9151753 I, I mean, I, I, I call, um, I often say one of my things is like the nervous system currently is the star of the trauma drama, because we know so much more about the nervous system than we ever have in the history of the world. 748 00:59:47,684.9151753 --> 00:59:50,619.8161753 And neuroscience has completely kind of got. 749 00:59:50,989.9161753 --> 00:59:57,619.9161753 into all the deep crevices of, of our understanding of trauma, which is brilliant because we understand like the body keeps the score. 750 00:59:57,999.9161753 --> 01:00:03,69.9161753 We understand it so well, but it, what it can create is a lot of clients. 751 01:00:03,69.9161753 --> 01:00:11,529.9161753 You probably see it too, who are like, you know, and then my amygdala does this and I know I'm in panic and a fight and flight, or I've read this or Stephen Porges and the Venn, my vagus nerve. 752 01:00:11,529.9161753 --> 01:00:23,554.9161753 And it's like, like, know, like there is also parts theory, you know, or, or with a shamanic tradition, you know, like, um, dissociated or parts or parts of your soul that are broken off. 753 01:00:24,334.9161753 --> 01:00:31,544.9161753 there are parts of us who were just vulnerable and in pain and need us to turn to them and greet them with compassion and love. 754 01:00:31,544.9161753 --> 01:00:33,254.9161753 It's not just the nervous system. 755 01:00:33,254.9161753 --> 01:00:42,864.9151753 So as much as I love all of these scientific developments, it's also giving people a language which helps them dissociate from their own. 756 01:00:43,539.9161753 --> 01:00:53,589.9161753 Self care and compassion and why it's so difficult is that, um, often if you have a trauma background, I mean, where do we learn compassion? We learn it through the mirror of our parents. 757 01:00:53,649.9151753 --> 01:00:55,549.9161753 that's where we learn it. 758 01:00:55,549.9161753 --> 01:01:04,109.9161753 You know, we, we learn it through the mother's soft gaze and that holding and the, the body contact and the kissing and, and, you know, Oh, like you've hurt yourself. 759 01:01:04,139.9161753 --> 01:01:05,489.9161753 I'm so sorry, sweetie. 760 01:01:05,489.9161753 --> 01:01:06,639.9161753 You know, all of that love and care. 761 01:01:06,639.9161753 --> 01:01:13,294.9161753 And if we don't have that, I mean, this is me, cause my clients are mostly, you know, survivors of childhood abuse situations. 762 01:01:13,304.9161753 --> 01:01:15,824.9161753 If we don't have that learning, we don't know. 763 01:01:15,834.9161753 --> 01:01:20,94.9161753 We're like, it's like, what's compassion? What do you mean care? You know? So you have to relearn it. 764 01:01:20,104.9161753 --> 01:01:22,524.8161753 So I'm not surprised it's a missing thing, but it, yeah. 765 01:01:22,774.9161753 --> 01:01:36,804.9151753 It is, you know, and I feel like that's, again, like if, if, if I could wave my magic wand, you know, the conversation around menopause would include all these beautiful moon based self care, like the power and the gift as well as this. 766 01:01:36,844.9161753 --> 01:01:45,434.9161753 And if I could wave my magic wand around trauma, it would be, let's just, let's hold the nervous system in one hand and let's hold compassion in the other because they, they go together. 767 01:01:45,434.9161753 --> 01:01:46,814.9161753 That's not a separate journey. 768 01:01:46,814.9161753 --> 01:01:49,123.9161753 It has to be together, you know, Yeah. 769 01:01:49,193.9161753 --> 01:01:51,583.9161753 Like the body's a component. 770 01:01:52,163.9161753 --> 01:01:56,118.8161753 So I talk about the five major energy systems of the body. 771 01:01:56,464.9151753 --> 01:02:10,578.9151753 Hmm, So there's the physical, which is your body, right? Like this is, that includes your nervous system, your brain, your organs, your fascia, like the, like all, all the, all the stuff, right? Like what you can see and observe through time and space. 772 01:02:11,168.9151753 --> 01:02:13,218.9161753 And then you have the mental, which is the mind. 773 01:02:14,68.9151753 --> 01:02:18,208.9161753 Everyone knows your mind is separate from the body. 774 01:02:19,108.9161753 --> 01:02:20,98.9161753 It's connected. 775 01:02:20,953.9161753 --> 01:02:23,833.9161753 But it's a different, you know, it's separated. 776 01:02:23,923.9161753 --> 01:02:28,543.9161753 And then you have the emotional energy system, which resides in the fascia. 777 01:02:28,583.9161753 --> 01:02:32,43.9161753 Remember I said, this is like how the body talks to the mind. 778 01:02:32,403.9161753 --> 01:02:49,123.9161753 And so even it's like, it's both, it's a part of the body and it's a part of the mind, right? It's like how, but really what the mind does is interprets the sensations of the body, the emotions, and then makes sense of it. 779 01:02:49,523.9161753 --> 01:02:52,953.9161753 And then makes the story up around it about what that means for them. 780 01:02:53,743.9161753 --> 01:03:01,923.9151753 And you have those three parts and then you have the spiritual part, which I kind of have two ways to explain this. 781 01:03:02,253.9161753 --> 01:03:19,789.9161753 So if you want to do just like using language, maybe traditional indigenous spiritual shamanic, you know, ways you have that spiritual part where if you get quiet, it's the higher, You know, wiser, wiser self Hmm. 782 01:03:19,878.9161753 --> 01:03:33,648.9161753 on a biological basis, I can also explain it to when you get into a state that allows you to have that kind of wisdom, that higher wisdom, higher self come through, you're not stressed. 783 01:03:34,48.9161753 --> 01:03:39,528.9161753 You feel safe and your have switched into different memory. 784 01:03:39,738.9161753 --> 01:03:41,268.9161753 I was like, you're either safe or not safe. 785 01:03:41,618.9161753 --> 01:03:45,688.9161753 And when you do that different parts of your brain turn on. 786 01:03:46,188.9151753 --> 01:03:48,818.9161753 And so it allows for a different way of thinking and being. 787 01:03:49,548.9151753 --> 01:03:50,128.9161753 And so. 788 01:03:50,209.0161753 --> 01:03:56,469.9161753 Um, Yeah. 789 01:03:57,288.9161753 --> 01:04:12,198.9151753 and so understanding that you need to, when you, when you're stressed, you cannot connect to that, that, spiritual energy, that spiritual part of self, that, that part that looks at an experience afterwards. 790 01:04:12,218.9161753 --> 01:04:14,208.9161753 And he's like, oh, my God, I can't believe I did that. 791 01:04:14,638.9161753 --> 01:04:19,648.9161753 Right? That part is not accessible when you're stressed. 792 01:04:19,828.9161753 --> 01:04:26,278.9161753 Right? So however you want to use it and whatever methods or tools you want to use to get there, they're all, they all work. 793 01:04:26,308.9161753 --> 01:04:27,898.9151753 They all basically do the same thing. 794 01:04:28,728.9161753 --> 01:04:38,89.9161753 It's just whichever works for your body and feels good for you with your background and your knowledge and your life experiences and Yeah, I love that. 795 01:04:38,984.9161753 --> 01:04:40,774.9161753 You have to meet people where they're at. 796 01:04:40,794.9161753 --> 01:04:52,274.9161753 I mean, there's an explanation, as you say, for that, you know, whether it's spiritual or nervous system, you know, it, it doesn't actually, the language doesn't actually matter because it's an experience we're going for anyway. 797 01:04:52,414.9151753 --> 01:04:54,108.9161753 Ah, exactly. 798 01:04:54,458.9161753 --> 01:04:58,688.9151753 And then the last of those four and the fifth energy system is social. 799 01:04:59,923.9161753 --> 01:05:02,83.9161753 This one gets overlooked, but it's fine. 800 01:05:02,913.9161753 --> 01:05:12,293.9161753 In my opinion, it's probably one of the most important parts because we as humans, I mean, I know, you know, this, so, um, I'm just going to be repeating stuff. 801 01:05:12,293.9161753 --> 01:05:21,653.9161753 You already know, um, as babies, we learn how to regulate our nervous system by the caregivers around us. 802 01:05:21,973.9161753 --> 01:05:22,763.9151753 We are mammals. 803 01:05:22,843.9151753 --> 01:05:23,773.9151753 This is what mammals do. 804 01:05:23,873.9151753 --> 01:05:27,743.9151753 Mammals and train with the other mammals around them. 805 01:05:27,793.9151753 --> 01:05:31,33.9151753 They, uh, co regulate their nervous system. 806 01:05:31,343.9161753 --> 01:05:33,433.9161753 So this is, this is protective. 807 01:05:33,443.9161753 --> 01:05:35,413.9161753 It can go in multiple directions. 808 01:05:35,423.9161753 --> 01:05:36,363.9161753 It can make us feel safe. 809 01:05:36,363.9161753 --> 01:05:39,193.9161753 It can also bring us into action. 810 01:05:39,393.9161753 --> 01:05:57,188.9161753 Like if your mom or your, you know, say you're, say you're sitting around the campfire as a society, like say go back tribal day and someone comes running in and it's the, the quote unquote crazy one, right? You're like, ah, okay. 811 01:05:57,668.9161753 --> 01:05:58,898.9161753 He's just being crazy. 812 01:05:58,898.9161753 --> 01:06:01,178.9161753 Right? You don't necessarily regulate with him. 813 01:06:01,538.9161753 --> 01:06:21,243.9161753 But when, you know, the, the person who is at the fence, guarding it comes in and is in heightened awareness, your nervous system will immediately entrain and it's protective, right? So we entrain with the people who are the ones that are, In charge, like that's just naturally what we do. 814 01:06:21,263.9161753 --> 01:06:29,643.9161753 And it's not always like the parent, sadly, sometimes it's the child that's actually regulating, you know, the parent. 815 01:06:30,273.9161753 --> 01:06:43,283.9161753 And so we don't, so kind of knowing that when you work with someone or you put yourself in situations with other people who have regulated nervous systems, you learn to regulate, and there's just so many different ways to do this. 816 01:06:43,284.0161753 --> 01:06:43,503.9161753 This is. 817 01:06:44,273.9161753 --> 01:06:49,309.9161753 Like there's, you know, as many different ways as there are people on this planet, you Yeah. 818 01:06:49,509.9161753 --> 01:06:57,779.9161753 is why group work is so, so helpful and important because when you're in a group, you can, you can benefit from that group entrainment, as you say. 819 01:06:58,153.9161753 --> 01:06:58,783.9161753 exactly. 820 01:06:58,993.9161753 --> 01:07:19,423.9161753 So you, I know, especially group work where, you know, you, especially if you get yourself really, you know, kind of dysregulated, like you do maybe an anger thing or, you know, a trauma, you know, like the different modalities that like actually get you dysregulated and then you practice coming back into regulation. 821 01:07:20,483.9161753 --> 01:07:33,243.9161753 It's almost irrelevant what you're doing, what you're really, what the real benefit is, is learning that practice of getting dysregulated and coming back to regulation and whichever modality speaks to you is the one you should do. 822 01:07:34,509.9151753 --> 01:07:36,199.9151753 Um, I love that. 823 01:07:36,209.9151753 --> 01:07:37,329.9151753 So I haven't quite heard that. 824 01:07:37,359.9161753 --> 01:07:40,579.9151753 So getting dysregulated together and run regulating together. 825 01:07:42,233.9151753 --> 01:07:42,613.9151754 Yeah. 826 01:07:43,573.9151753 --> 01:07:46,223.9171753 That teaches you more than talking. 827 01:07:47,409.9161753 --> 01:07:47,929.9161753 Yeah. 828 01:07:47,929.9161753 --> 01:07:48,219.9161753 Yeah. 829 01:07:48,219.9161753 --> 01:07:55,53.9161753 Well, there's so many things that, that, that, that work more than talking, you know, um, I'm not discrediting the talking though. 830 01:07:55,83.9161753 --> 01:07:56,433.9161753 Cause we still have that mental. 831 01:07:56,813.9161753 --> 01:07:58,783.9161753 We, you have to also work with mine. 832 01:07:58,803.9161753 --> 01:07:59,983.9161753 You can't ignore the mind. 833 01:08:00,459.9161753 --> 01:08:01,99.9161753 You can't ignore it. 834 01:08:01,99.9161753 --> 01:08:06,429.9161753 And you also, you need to be heard and you need to empathy and have your story told and all of that. 835 01:08:06,439.9161753 --> 01:08:08,29.9161753 but know how it is. 836 01:08:08,79.9151753 --> 01:08:10,699.9161753 Like, you don't want to be just talking for 30 years. 837 01:08:10,899.9161753 --> 01:08:13,909.9161753 Um, um, yeah, but I love that notion of group. 838 01:08:14,768.9161754 --> 01:08:15,98.9161754 Yeah. 839 01:08:15,128.9161753 --> 01:08:24,608.9151753 Like, ideally you're working with like these different systems together and feeling and getting to experience it and release energy and get that regulation and all the things. 840 01:08:24,608.9151753 --> 01:08:36,49.8161753 And to me, that's like, I haven't heard it put in quite those terms, but there is a great book on trauma, um, from an Australian psychologist who studied, um, trauma. 841 01:08:36,289.9161753 --> 01:08:44,459.9161753 Groups like group therapy and, um, aboriginal settings in Australia, and I can't, it's the word traumas in it. 842 01:08:44,709.9161753 --> 01:08:55,49.9151753 I'll, I'll email it to you and you can put it in the show notes if you'd like, but it's a really interesting study because what she shows is that, um, in these aboriginal communities. 843 01:08:55,524.9161753 --> 01:09:14,249.9161753 As you would expect, people heal more profoundly, more deeply and have a longer lasting, you know, outcomes, positive outcomes when they work together as a group, and she just facilitates groups that to some degree mirror how, um, You know, indigenous communities would process group trauma. 844 01:09:14,289.9161753 --> 01:09:21,429.9156753 So you have the person who's gone through trauma and there's a sense of being held and seen and heard and having them tell their stories in a group. 845 01:09:21,429.9156753 --> 01:09:23,319.9161753 And it's, there's a lot more to the book. 846 01:09:23,319.9161753 --> 01:09:30,769.9161753 It's a lot of interesting analysis, but it's, it's, it's one of my go to books, just, just really showcasing that power of. 847 01:09:31,374.9161753 --> 01:09:42,334.9161753 Um, that group experience and that dynamic of community, you know, a community is a real buzzword lately, and I'm really glad that it's finally on the radar because we do really need community to heal. 848 01:09:42,344.9161753 --> 01:09:43,944.9151753 We, we really need community. 849 01:09:43,944.9161753 --> 01:10:09,349.9156753 And if we don't have that in our family, in our extended families, in our neighborhoods, we need to find ways to, to create it because it is, as you say, I hadn't put, put it quite together with the way that you describe it, which is really beautiful about that dysregulation and regulation, but it does facilitate that kind of, um, it almost disperses the way I, that I, I conceptualize it as it kind of disperses the, the pain, you know, so that you're not the only one holding it. 850 01:10:09,349.9156753 --> 01:10:12,479.9161753 Everyone is like energetically holding it for you. 851 01:10:12,479.9161753 --> 01:10:15,419.9161753 And it just kind of can dissolve it out of your body a little bit. 852 01:10:15,704.9161753 --> 01:10:32,34.9156753 You know, in that group, which we don't get when we live these isolated lives all by ourselves, Which is why I think one of the things I'm fond of saying is, um, you know, um, like, um, trauma healing is not just about what you do in that diet. 853 01:10:32,34.9156753 --> 01:10:37,374.9161753 It's also about the art of living and it's, you know, healing, living is healing and we need to have. 854 01:10:37,944.9161753 --> 01:10:46,509.9156753 so many different things in our life for our healing other than just working with someone, which is of course very powerful, but also there are other things that are incredibly healing. 855 01:10:46,509.9156753 --> 01:10:58,829.9161753 And my favorite example of that is, uh, there are lots of surf programs in California and in Australia where they work with veterans, um, with PTSD, and they teach them to surf as a way of helping them regulate their nervous system. 856 01:10:58,829.9161753 --> 01:11:01,219.9161753 And the outcomes are phenomenal with that. 857 01:11:01,249.9161753 --> 01:11:02,829.9161753 Just, just getting a bunch of. 858 01:11:03,434.9161753 --> 01:11:06,994.9161753 People together with PTSD and getting them in the water and surfing and having fun. 859 01:11:07,414.9161753 --> 01:11:12,244.9161753 There's so many reasons why it works, but I think it's, it's really beautiful because you know how it is. 860 01:11:12,244.9161753 --> 01:11:20,494.9161753 Like not everyone is going to want to talk or want to see, you know, a therapist or a coach or one on one, um, But yeah, there are other ways. 861 01:11:20,494.9161753 --> 01:11:31,368.9151754 And that, and I think with that, like the surf programs, it's partly that experience of surfing, which is its own particular thing, but it's also that community and that group activity, yeah, exactly. 862 01:11:31,368.9161754 --> 01:11:38,824.9156753 I think, um, And talking, I mean, I'm a fan of talking I am too. 863 01:11:38,824.9156753 --> 01:11:39,234.9151753 I love it. 864 01:11:39,235.0151753 --> 01:11:39,934.9161753 And I loved it. 865 01:11:39,934.9161753 --> 01:11:42,494.9161753 I love clients who want to tell me their story. 866 01:11:42,494.9161753 --> 01:11:43,744.9161753 I'm totally down for that. 867 01:11:43,754.9171753 --> 01:11:55,224.9161753 Like I, I can really hold it like, and it's important, you know, sometimes people have never fully just said how they're, what they're, what they're dealing with, you know, but that's not, that's not all there is. 868 01:11:55,264.9161753 --> 01:11:55,854.9161753 So, yeah. 869 01:11:56,398.9161754 --> 01:11:56,968.9161754 exactly. 870 01:11:57,278.9161753 --> 01:12:01,128.9161754 It's, um, as it's like what you said, meaning. 871 01:12:01,678.9161754 --> 01:12:11,418.9161754 The people where they're at, right? And it's about being honest and kind of going back to like, okay, what do I actually need to feel safe? I need to work with someone who isn't. 872 01:12:12,608.9161753 --> 01:12:16,578.9161754 Going to make me feel like I'm broken, right? So 1 of the issues. 873 01:12:17,613.9161754 --> 01:12:20,3.9161754 I have had in finding people that I like. 874 01:12:20,13.9161754 --> 01:12:45,863.9161754 I mean, I, I found people I like to work with, but oftentimes, even as a coach that knows how important it is to work with the coach, I'm lucky I've got some good ones now, but it took me a while to find them because a lot of times I find people have that fixing energy, which is actually just a stress response, um, where they're uncomfortable with you not living life to their standards. 875 01:12:45,864.0161754 --> 01:12:48,183.8161754 Yeah. 876 01:12:48,399.9161753 --> 01:13:07,119.9151753 I mean, um, I, I laugh because I, so I, so relate, you know, it's, it's, it's interesting because this is like, um, I, I've, I've started running a training program for practitioners on how to do soul led trauma healing, like inviting the soul into the room rather than leaving it at the door kind of thing. 877 01:13:07,609.9151753 --> 01:13:13,54.9161753 And it's about like, the training is about not Not what you do, like not your modality toolkit. 878 01:13:13,64.9161753 --> 01:13:17,414.9161753 Like you might be hypnotherapist it's about the outside of the session. 879 01:13:17,414.9161753 --> 01:13:20,474.9151753 It's about the before and after how you frame it, the space you hold. 880 01:13:20,774.9161753 --> 01:13:29,774.9161753 And, and I, and the, you know, there are four pillars, like we all have our pillars, but the first pillar really is that leaning in, you know, and being available to hold that space. 881 01:13:29,804.9161753 --> 01:13:30,494.9161753 And, and. 882 01:13:31,59.9161753 --> 01:13:38,409.9161753 I, the reason, the way that I explain it to people is through contrast because, you know, contrast is, you know, the best teacher ever. 883 01:13:38,409.9161753 --> 01:13:43,139.9161753 I is so hard sometimes to know what's good unless we understand why something doesn't work. 884 01:13:43,139.9161753 --> 01:13:49,9.9151753 But the reason that leaning in so important is that I think largely exactly what you're saying. 885 01:13:49,19.9161753 --> 01:14:00,29.9161753 There's this energy that can permeate that dyadic relationship with a practitioner and a client where there's just this natural tendency to pathologize because already the dynamic is. 886 01:14:00,404.9161753 --> 01:14:03,764.9161753 I'm the one who's a practitioner and you're the one who's broken. 887 01:14:03,774.9161753 --> 01:14:08,614.9161753 And, and, and there's this whole attitude, like I have these tools because I need to fix you. 888 01:14:08,614.9161753 --> 01:14:13,184.9161753 It's like, we have to get back to the baseline, um, which isn't what soul centered healing is about. 889 01:14:13,504.9161753 --> 01:14:15,324.9161753 In my view, it's an evolutionary thing. 890 01:14:15,614.9161753 --> 01:14:20,4.9161753 It's that whole thing of post traumatic growth, right? It's evolutionary. 891 01:14:20,14.9161753 --> 01:14:24,394.9161753 It's you can get to a place where some things are better than before. 892 01:14:25,64.9161753 --> 01:14:31,594.9151753 So yeah, I love that you say that and it's great for people listening to understand that like there is, that's not true. 893 01:14:31,594.9161753 --> 01:14:42,204.9161753 Like there is no brokenness, like, you know, know, trauma is, it's the human condition, right? Like only in the past hundred and. 894 01:14:42,539.9161753 --> 01:14:55,339.9161753 You know, 20 years, do we even understand the notion of trauma? Like, and that comes from that psychotherapeutic tradition where we started to go, Oh, like people have these pathologies and what happened in their childhood with Freud and, and then Jung and all that. 895 01:14:55,349.9161753 --> 01:15:09,209.9161753 Like that's only, so it's only in 120 years that we understand that there are ways of working with people who are suffering, but you know, through all of human history, what's the common experience of humanity is that people suffer. 896 01:15:09,689.9161753 --> 01:15:14,279.9161753 You know, like you used to be, you couldn't be a mother without experiencing loss. 897 01:15:14,289.9161753 --> 01:15:20,989.9161753 Like it was just very unlikely that you weren't going to lose a baby or yourself die or lose a female that you knew to childbirth. 898 01:15:20,989.9161753 --> 01:15:21,289.9161753 Right. 899 01:15:21,329.9161753 --> 01:15:24,259.9161753 So like trauma is so incredibly normal. 900 01:15:24,299.9151753 --> 01:15:29,869.9161753 And I think that's the space we need to hold for, like, we are all to some extent. 901 01:15:30,279.9161753 --> 01:15:36,949.9161753 trauma survivors, you know, some in different ways than others, but that common humanity is so important. 902 01:15:36,959.9161753 --> 01:15:39,299.9151753 And, um, you know, it's a shame. 903 01:15:39,339.9161753 --> 01:15:41,569.9156753 I'm glad that you found people, but yeah, you're right. 904 01:15:41,569.9156753 --> 01:15:51,689.9161753 It's difficult because I think, yeah, with all the best intentions, People go into the healing profession because first we really need to figure out our own wounding. 905 01:15:51,689.9161753 --> 01:15:59,179.9161753 And that's not as disparaging remark because that's just human, right? And how beautiful that we want to help ourselves through helping other people. 906 01:15:59,469.9151753 --> 01:16:08,949.9161753 There is a purity of intention very often, but also like until you develop that awareness over time, you're, you know, there is this tendency to fix. 907 01:16:08,999.9161753 --> 01:16:13,59.9161753 And you know what the training programs, Don't really make matters any better. 908 01:16:13,89.9161753 --> 01:16:20,949.9156753 Like I have to be honest, like there's so many programs out there that are teaching practitioners who teach them like our method is like the only method. 909 01:16:20,949.9156753 --> 01:16:26,989.9161753 And it's going to a hundred percent fix all your problems in one to three sessions, and you can charge a thousand dollars per session. 910 01:16:26,989.9161753 --> 01:16:29,779.9151753 And it's like, you know, like. 911 01:16:31,114.9161753 --> 01:16:41,434.9161753 That's not how humans work and, and it's not even, it's not, as you know, like I'm sure you know, it's not, it's not the things you do as a practitioner. 912 01:16:41,434.9161753 --> 01:16:45,694.9161753 It's the space you hold and who you are and your attitude and your paradigm and the rapport. 913 01:16:45,694.9161753 --> 01:16:49,814.9161753 Like rapport is huge, right? Like if you have rapport with someone, like the studies are really clear. 914 01:16:49,814.9161753 --> 01:16:50,664.9161753 It doesn't matter. 915 01:16:50,954.9161753 --> 01:16:55,84.9161753 They could tell you to wear a silly hat and chant a mantra and walk in a circle. 916 01:16:55,84.9161753 --> 01:16:59,823.9161753 If the rapport is good, you're going to shift, you know? So, yeah. 917 01:17:00,203.9161754 --> 01:17:00,693.9161753 I will. 918 01:17:00,793.9161753 --> 01:17:06,479.9161753 I will argue that that rapport is nervous system regulation, Yes. 919 01:17:07,19.9161753 --> 01:17:07,359.9161753 Interesting. 920 01:17:07,359.9161753 --> 01:17:07,839.9161753 Yeah. 921 01:17:08,153.9161753 --> 01:17:21,589.9161753 that fixing energy, it's, it's cause the, the, the therapist or the, you know, the practitioner is stressed about the other person's, wounding or whatever They're trying, Yeah. 922 01:17:21,909.9161753 --> 01:17:24,319.9161753 they're triggered by it, or they don't know to handle it. 923 01:17:24,319.9161753 --> 01:17:25,109.9161753 Or, yeah, yeah. 924 01:17:25,373.9161754 --> 01:17:32,563.9161753 Whatever it is like, uh, or they're, it's their own stress, like, oh, I have to prove that I know what I'm doing. 925 01:17:32,783.9161754 --> 01:17:35,163.9161754 I have to prove that this method works. 926 01:17:35,883.9151754 --> 01:17:38,603.9161754 That's a lot of energy that I, I see. 927 01:17:39,43.9161754 --> 01:18:06,43.9161753 You know, show up, um, the sadly, the imposter syndrome that so many people, you know, have just in general, because we all grow up feeling less than, and we don't value just our, everyone's inherent worth of existing and their existence in that moment being beneficial to someone else. 928 01:18:07,513.9161754 --> 01:18:07,893.9161754 Right. 929 01:18:09,463.9161754 --> 01:18:12,293.9161754 Like, I think about this a lot with my, my younger son. 930 01:18:12,303.9161753 --> 01:18:14,793.9161754 Um, so his disability. 931 01:18:15,573.9161753 --> 01:18:29,913.9161754 You know, never say never, you know, like, but if you're going to be like, realistic use past is, you know, as evidence kind of thing, he's never going to be a quote unquote, productive member of society. 932 01:18:30,113.9161753 --> 01:18:40,163.9161754 Right and 1 would argue, like, oh, what's the value in that? Right? You know, right? Like, what's his value if he's not able to contribute. 933 01:18:40,468.9161753 --> 01:18:58,819.9161753 To these, these ideas that people have of what a successful life is, or, you know, like this, this right when already in his 12 years, I have so many stories of how he's positively impacted people's Ugh. 934 01:18:59,348.9161753 --> 01:19:16,388.9161754 And I, I'm like, what's more productive than that? Like what's like, what's more beneficial to society then? Like, I mean, some of the stories that come to me in like these weird, you know, weird ways, like there was one, there's one, so I have a two sons. 935 01:19:16,398.9151754 --> 01:19:21,458.9161754 So I have my older son who had a friend who was around my younger son and kind of. 936 01:19:22,143.9161753 --> 01:19:27,163.9161754 Learned a little bit about him and his disability and just like, Oh, his brain works a little differently than other people. 937 01:19:27,163.9161754 --> 01:19:30,583.9161754 And just kind of realize that that, that happens sometimes. 938 01:19:30,593.9151754 --> 01:19:36,73.9156753 Like sometimes people don't act the way normal developing, you know, people act. 939 01:19:36,73.9156753 --> 01:19:36,383.9151753 Right. 940 01:19:36,823.9151753 --> 01:19:44,303.9161753 And there was a kid in his school that he's like, You know, we found out later, right? So the mom called me up. 941 01:19:44,323.9161753 --> 01:19:59,863.9151754 I just have to tell you, I had a conversation with my son because apparently he like kept this kid from getting bullied by the teachers because he was like, Hey, he just thinks a little differently. 942 01:20:02,703.9161754 --> 01:20:10,143.9161753 And I was like, um, when she went to talk to her son about like, why, you know, like, oh, the, you know, that was interesting. 943 01:20:10,143.9161753 --> 01:20:13,873.9161754 You know, like where did it go? It's like, oh, I remember max max things differently sometimes. 944 01:20:13,874.0161754 --> 01:20:14,63.9161753 Right. 945 01:20:14,63.9161753 --> 01:20:14,253.8161753 Right. 946 01:20:15,233.9161753 --> 01:20:15,613.9161754 Right. 947 01:20:15,879.9161753 --> 01:20:17,429.9161753 that's so beautiful. 948 01:20:17,683.9161753 --> 01:20:17,953.9161753 Right. 949 01:20:17,953.9161753 --> 01:20:23,883.9161753 And so there's all these, you know, there are all these beautiful things that happen just because you exist. 950 01:20:23,963.9161753 --> 01:20:34,583.9161754 Like whoever's watching this, listening right now, like I guarantee you, your existence has made other people extremely happy in ways that you have no idea. 951 01:20:35,449.9161753 --> 01:20:36,119.9161753 Absolutely. 952 01:20:36,129.9161753 --> 01:20:36,529.9161753 Yeah. 953 01:20:36,559.9161753 --> 01:20:36,909.9161753 Yeah. 954 01:20:36,929.9161753 --> 01:20:38,259.9161753 I mean, it's, it's a product. 955 01:20:38,259.9161753 --> 01:20:46,999.9161753 I mean, we're a product of our culture and we're in a capitalist consumerist productivity obsessed culture where your worth is so tied to, to that. 956 01:20:47,49.9161753 --> 01:20:51,379.9161753 But that's, that's just where we are in space and time and other places in time. 957 01:20:51,379.9161753 --> 01:20:52,249.9161753 That's not the case. 958 01:20:52,329.9161753 --> 01:20:58,119.9161753 And I think, yeah, it's, it's, I think it's so healthy to start looking at our lives differently. 959 01:20:58,569.9161753 --> 01:21:16,389.9161753 You know, and, and for me, you know, looking at it from a soul based perspective really helps because I think of it like, you know, we've all come down and having this life, this human life to have the experience of being human and that's enough just to be Michelle and going about her life with her kids and her complications. 960 01:21:16,389.9161753 --> 01:21:17,869.9161753 And, you know, like that is enough. 961 01:21:17,869.9161753 --> 01:21:54,504.9161753 Like the, it's the experience, the souls we want, not the accolades, success, results, outcomes, things, you know, it's the experience of, of You know, um, recovering from suffering or the experience of, you know, having a child with a disability or the experience of, you know, et cetera, you know, and it often, what it brings me back to is this beautiful thing that I heard about, you know, um, you know, there are a lot of, a lot of monks, um, you know, like particularly in India who live in monasteries their whole life, you know, from the time they're children and, you know, They just, they meditate all day and they live these very monastic lives. 962 01:21:54,604.9161753 --> 01:21:58,924.9161753 And it's this thing of like, what's the point of that? Like they're not doing anything. 963 01:21:58,934.9161753 --> 01:22:11,684.9161753 And you know, the answer is that some people say like the monks, the nuns of the world, they're, they're the trees of the planet energetically, like through their beingness, they're breathing and cleaning the energy and cleaning the air through us. 964 01:22:11,684.9161753 --> 01:22:19,214.9151753 And I just love that idea that they're the trees of the planet, you know, and that I always bring that back to myself when I have a moment where I'm like, I'm not productive enough. 965 01:22:19,584.9151753 --> 01:22:20,874.9161753 I go, hang on, like. 966 01:22:21,259.9161753 --> 01:22:26,759.9161753 Like, I am just a being and just my energy, you know, is transmuting something. 967 01:22:26,759.9161753 --> 01:22:40,899.9161753 If I can sit in that space of just compassion and love and just be myself in this moment, you know, with whatever reaction I have, you know, I'm also having an effect, you know, just like these monks with the trees of the planet, you know, breathing for us. 968 01:22:40,899.9161753 --> 01:22:42,279.9161753 I think that's really beautiful. 969 01:22:44,663.9161754 --> 01:22:46,173.9161754 I love that so much. 970 01:22:46,513.9161753 --> 01:22:47,853.9161753 I'm going to take that with me. 971 01:22:49,13.9161754 --> 01:22:49,33.9161753 Ugh. 972 01:22:50,363.9161753 --> 01:22:51,383.9161753 And on that note. 973 01:22:51,978.9161754 --> 01:23:01,429.9161753 I think if anyone wants to work with you and find you, how would they do that? Well, um, I don't know. 974 01:23:01,434.9161753 --> 01:23:14,979.9161753 I have two websites, so I, if you, if you are interested in working with me as a client because you're, you know, you're processing through like a trauma history, then it's michelle slash michelle hyphen dixon.com. 975 01:23:15,579.9161753 --> 01:23:19,479.9161753 But I also work with practitioners doing that SOUL led um. 976 01:23:19,869.9161753 --> 01:23:25,89.9161753 trauma practitioner training, and also some marketing for practitioners and that's academy for healers. 977 01:23:25,269.9161753 --> 01:23:25,519.9161753 com. 978 01:23:25,519.9161753 --> 01:23:29,139.9161753 But I'm sure Wendy will put that in the show notes, but yeah, there are options there. 979 01:23:29,548.9161754 --> 01:23:29,568.9161753 Yay. 980 01:23:30,568.9161753 --> 01:23:30,868.9161754 I love it. 981 01:23:30,898.9161753 --> 01:23:36,38.9161754 Well, thank you so much for this wonderful deep conversation. 982 01:23:37,578.9161754 --> 01:23:38,788.9161754 Um, if you. 983 01:23:38,788.9161754 --> 01:23:43,498.9161754 had any just like last closing thoughts, you know, for that, you want. 984 01:23:44,28.9161753 --> 01:23:51,609.9161753 To leave, you know, here, what would they be? Last closing thoughts. 985 01:23:51,759.9161753 --> 01:23:57,559.9161753 I would just encourage anyone who's listened to all or part of the conversation to just pay attention to what. 986 01:23:57,999.9161753 --> 01:24:15,149.9161753 Jumped out for you and, you know, and, and take that and run with it and, and go down that rabbit hole of whatever it is that sparked your attention, whether it was like the menopause, the moon stuff, the, know, being your authentic self experience, yeah, just, um, yeah. 987 01:24:15,149.9161753 --> 01:24:17,139.9161753 Pay attention to what jumps out for you. 988 01:24:17,189.9151753 --> 01:24:18,609.9161753 That's always how I operate. 989 01:24:18,609.9161753 --> 01:24:26,189.9161753 Cause you know, like I listened to lots of things and I'm, it's always something I take away that leads me to the next thing, you know, so, yeah. 990 01:24:26,478.9161754 --> 01:24:26,848.9161753 I love that. 991 01:24:27,478.9161753 --> 01:24:28,438.9161753 Thank you so much. 992 01:24:28,458.9161754 --> 01:24:29,868.9161754 This has been such a pleasure. 993 01:24:30,108.9161753 --> 01:24:31,188.9161753 It's been really fun. 994 01:24:32,468.9171754 --> 01:24:36,985.583842 Yay! Thanks! Thank you for joining for today's episode. 995 01:24:37,325.583842 --> 01:24:41,935.583842 I hope you found the conversation interesting, maybe even a little inspiring. 996 01:24:42,215.583842 --> 01:24:48,405.583842 And if you're curious about how to work with our guest today, check out the show notes, because I'll have all the links and resources there. 997 01:24:48,695.583842 --> 01:24:53,425.583842 And if you're curious about how to work with me or what I offer, you can check out my website, Wendy goes deep. 998 01:24:53,635.583842 --> 01:24:56,95.582842 com to learn more about what it is that I do. 999 01:24:56,95.682842 --> 01:25:00,705.483842 And I'd like to take this opportunity to ask you for a little favor. 1000 01:25:00,895.583842 --> 01:25:05,595.583842 Growing this community is only possible with support from people like you. 1001 01:25:05,835.583842 --> 01:25:11,305.583842 If you could take a moment to like, subscribe, or maybe even share it with a friend, it helps more than you know. 1002 01:25:11,755.583842 --> 01:25:15,515.583842 And until we can go deep again, stay curious and keep exploring.

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