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May 14, 2025 3 mins

Recently, I shared Top 10 Tips from experts on how to spend more quality time than productive time when visiting your older parents. (Check it out!) I just got back from a visit to my parents and my husband asked, “Well, how did you do? Did you take your own advice?”

Hmmm, I’m going to take a few minutes to reflect on that in this post and share some gems we uncovered.

Well, I did better than before. I am pretty pleased with my progress.

Did I schedule quality time first? I did! We made a plan to spend a mother-daughter-granddaughter day at nearby hot springs. Sadly, the San Diego rain wouldn’t quit so we had to cancel. But, we did the next best thing - Marshall’s shopping trip and lunch out! California has the best Marshall’s and it’s my mom’s favorite place to hunt for bargains.

Did I have a shorter list? I did! We made doctors appointments, sorted out meds, spent several hours on iCloud password resets and computer updates. We also discovered a new beach and spent fun, quality time with extended family.

Did we find my Uncle Tommy’s letters from Vietnam? No, but we found lots of other things in the process. Like my dad’s middle school, high school, and college yearbooks. He and his granddaughter spent time sharing fun memories, looking at team photos, and recalling old friends’ (and girlfriends!) names from way back when. That’s even better than reading old letters (back to that topic the next visit).

While searching the cabinets, I found several unfilled photo albums that have been kicking around for decades and boxes slides in various states of organization. I tried to convince her to donate 4 of the 8 empty photo albums and put them by the garage door. I am sure they’ll be back in the cabinet after I leave. I tried.

Did we get to the will/trust updates? No. But maybe I found someone who can help.

Did I plan a shared project? I did! I asked my mom to be part of this Who Gets the China? project and participate in my (forthcoming) podcast and she said yes! We re-loaded Zoom on her new computer and did a test recording. I am excited to see where that leads.

Did I save tasks for the last day? Not so much! I did better. My mom dug out a bin of old coins - some from 1899 and some from random countries. She and my daughter had a grand time polishing them and researching them online. Is a tarnished British coin from 1899 worth anything? Not much more than a moment of polishing joy- and that is just fine by me.

All in all, I am pleased with my progress so far!

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