December 19, 2023 • 23 mins
The always insightful Tyler Lockett sits down with Big Ray for an open, honest discussion about his own mental health. Today’s show: why Tyler decided to play football (01:40), why Tyler may be underrated (02:57), dealing with depression and anxiety (06:00), describing panic attacks (09:30), self-affirmation and taking control (15:00), Mindful Therapy Group (22:25).
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:01):
You're listening to Big Raised Garage, grind.
Speaker 2 (00:04):
I want to bring awareness and my voice to something
that's meaningful and purposeful, more than just who's the best
football player, who's the best football team?
Speaker 1 (00:11):
The intersection between life, football and mental health.
Speaker 2 (00:15):
When you need help and you ask for help, you're
operating from a position of power. When you need help
and you don't ask for help, that's the weakness.
Speaker 1 (00:24):
Now here's your host, Seahawk's Legend, Ray Roberts.
Speaker 2 (00:28):
What is up?
Speaker 3 (00:29):
Fam?
Speaker 2 (00:30):
This is the Big Raise Garage Ryan, brought to you
by the Mindful Therapy Group, and I am your host,
Big Ray, And today I'm super excited because little does
Tyler know, but from the very beginning of this podcast
and this effort, he was like the number one dude
on my list to get in to get into the room.
Speaker 3 (00:49):
And I know we didn't have time.
Speaker 2 (00:52):
We wanted to kick off the season with Tyler, but
the way the season is going and how busy you
guys are, wasn't able to do that. But we are
super excited today to be able to talk to the
one and the only mister Tyler Lockett and so of
you guys that don't know about Tyler Tyler's been a
first team All Pro. He is like if you include
like the playoffs, he has over eight thousand yards receiving
(01:12):
in sixty I think touchdowns for the sea Hawks. For
the Seahawks, He's been to the Pro Bowl. He's a
team captain. He's just like a mister Everything's dude, a
renaissance kind of guy to me, real estate broker or agent,
one of the two. And so just excited to have
you here, man, and just to kind of get things
started just a little bit. You know, we talked a
(01:35):
little bit about your football endeavors and things. You're not
the biggest dude in the world. Yeah, what motivated you
and what drove you to football? For guys your size, Yeah, well,
I mean, you know, my family was a sports family,
so I was always introduced to sports at a young age.
Played basketball, football, baseball, and so like playing multiple sports
(01:57):
helps you to be able to, like play football really
great because when you're playing basketball, you're working on your
quickness when you're and you're working on understanding the plays
how it's supposed to develop people getting open. You play baseball,
it's more of the hand eye coordination and even when
you do stuff like run track.
Speaker 1 (02:14):
I mean, it's helping you build up your speed.
Speaker 4 (02:17):
And so, you know, being born in a sports family,
having an opportunity to understand that my best chance was
to go in football through the scholarships and stuff that
we get for full rides, and then after that it's
just mastering your craft. My faith always drove me to
want to be great and glorify God and everything that
I do. And so just having that opportunity to play
football and try to master my craft has helped me
(02:39):
get to this spot as well.
Speaker 3 (02:41):
I feel you.
Speaker 2 (02:41):
And then also you know, we always I wish we
could find a different way to say it, but we
always say man title Locket is the most underrated receiver
in the league. And it almost seems like even saying
it that way speaks it like kind of pushes you down.
It's like, but what is it? Why do you think
that other receivers get more attention? Then you get like
(03:02):
around here, we know who you are and what you
do and what you bring into it. The toe taps
and you know, a ability to get open when people
are scrambling, just find the opening spot. All these different
kinds of things. But why do you think that maybe
you don't get some of the I don't want to
say respect, but recognition.
Speaker 4 (03:18):
I guess, yeah, Well, I think a lot of it
too depends on the market that you're in.
Speaker 2 (03:22):
Uh.
Speaker 4 (03:22):
You know, because we're out on the West Coast. There's
not a lot of people across the world that really
get to watch us play. And so when you're looking
at the teams that's in the Midwest or the South
or the East, a lot of people are more in
tuned with being able to watch them. Then you're talking
about like the marketing of teams you're talking about. I
think even when you look at what you want a
(03:43):
receiver to be, people don't really you know, look at
me as the first candidate, or even probably the top
five candidates. It's just people like to look at a
receiver as you know, speed, and so then they quickly
find somebody for speed, they look at somebody for height,
they say this is what it has to be. They
find somebody that's like creative and savvy, and they say, well,
(04:07):
this is what a receiver's supposed to look like.
Speaker 1 (04:09):
But I think for me, I'm just like a football player.
Speaker 4 (04:12):
And because of that, it's like, well, there's not one
thing that they could pinpoint that says this is what
makes him a top notch receiver. It's just Okay, he
does everything right, he's in the right spot, Okay, he
makes the catch, Okay, he gets the yards. But there's
nothing like electrifying about him to say he should be
in this category as other receivers. And so I also
(04:34):
think too, like we have so many great receivers here.
We do a great job trying to get everybody involved,
and I think sometimes when you look at how other
teams are, players get way more opportunities to be featured
and stuff like that, which allows them to have that
chance early on in their career.
Speaker 1 (04:51):
Yeah, to be that guy.
Speaker 2 (04:53):
Yeah, well I will tell you, dude, like there's I've
had the opportunity with this podcast. I interviewed Doug Goldwin,
Cliff April kJ Wright and now interviewing you, and I
can't pick four other Seahawks that I would rather interview.
Speaker 3 (05:07):
You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 2 (05:08):
You guys all bring such uniqueness to this topic and
also to the team, and you're so involved in the community.
I think those are great things. But I know that
we don't have you for a long time, So I
want to kind of just kind of jump right into
it a little bit. You know, this podcast was created
to one tell my story around my mental health journey.
Two was to kind of debunk the idea of the
(05:30):
stigma around mental health for athletes and for.
Speaker 3 (05:34):
Black dudes specifically.
Speaker 2 (05:38):
And then three was to kind of show the listeners
and the viewers the humanity of who we are, because
so many times we're just a helmet in paths.
Speaker 3 (05:47):
You know what I'm saying with.
Speaker 2 (05:48):
These caricatures of gladiators that don't bleed, don't cry, don't have.
Speaker 3 (05:52):
Emotions, all those kinds of things.
Speaker 2 (05:53):
And so what I'd like to do is I know
that you know, I think it was last year or
a couple of years ago where you posted that two
out of the seven years that you played in the
league that you were playing through some type of trauma
and that you were dealing with depression and anxiety. If
you're willing to be vulnerable enough, can you walk us
through those two situations and like kind of what was
(06:15):
going on and during those times?
Speaker 4 (06:17):
Yeah, well, I mean I think each ones are different. Like,
you know, there was one time, think going into the
end of my third year, I had my first panic attack.
You know, never knew what it was, and so that
stuff makes you feel like you're going to die right
off the top, you know, so you have a panic attack.
They really say that there's no difference in figuring out
what's a panic attack and what's a heart attack, and
(06:39):
just having to go through that whole experience kind of
messes you up because you know, you go to the hospital,
you know, the doctors are trying to figure out what's
going on. They're asking if you took cocaine and oh,
you know all this stuff, and you're saying no, and
they're like, well, are you sure, like you know, maybe
you did and you didn't know, like you know, so
it makes you like start freaking out even more, making
(07:01):
the experience even worse. And so, you know, then learning
and understanding like how to maneuver through that and work
through that because sometimes you know, nobody knows what it's
like to die until you feel like you're about to die.
And even though that wasn't the case that I was
about to die, it still felt like that, like a
near death type of experience, and so then it starts
(07:22):
to mess with you mentally. You start to think that
it's going to happen again over and over. You start to,
like slowly you start to add in like that fear
and trauma into other circumstances that's going on in life
that didn't have anything to do with it, but now
you're just if you can't control it early, you start
(07:44):
allowing it to like creep into other areas to where
now it becomes something that's uncontrollable and hard to be
able to maintain. And so, you know, I had to
go through that, play through that, and I think it's
a daily battle that you had to learn and had to,
you know, learn how to overcome and go through things
that you go through, you know, within your your circle,
(08:05):
or your families, or you know, whatever the case is.
You got to learn how to be able to overcome that.
But sometimes, like I said, it takes days, it takes months,
it takes years, it takes talking to other people. But
you know, you also learn how to be great in
every situation. You know, if you can only be great
when you have a sound mind, then I feel like
(08:26):
you're missing a point of learning how you can still
be able to operate and be great when you have,
you know, not so much of a sound mind. You know,
like you might be going through it mentally. But if
you feel like you can only be free when you're
not going through it mentally, then you're always going to
struggle when you go through it mentally. So sometimes you
got to be your how we are our worst critic,
(08:48):
You also got to be your biggest supporter, right, And
the more and more that you realize like, oh, nothing's happening,
the more and more that you take its power away.
Speaker 3 (08:58):
I feel it.
Speaker 2 (08:59):
So when you so the panic attack thing, I can
identify way because I've dealt with the same thing. But
it can be different for everyone, you know, for different people.
So for me, I couldn't get myself to go out
the door, so I would look at the door knob
and then for some reason, like my heart would start racing,
I couldn't breathe, my chest would get super tight, and
(09:20):
I could not get I was blocked three hundred pund
dudes in my life, you know, for career, and I couldn't.
I couldn't turn the knob on a one pound door,
you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 3 (09:28):
So for you, what what did it feel like like?
Did it like? Did it?
Speaker 2 (09:32):
Was it the same type of elements like tightness and
tightness of the chest, breathing like.
Speaker 1 (09:37):
Well, yeah, it was the same stuff I think.
Speaker 4 (09:39):
You know, it gives you the social anxiety because then
you don't want to go outside because you think it's
going to happen again in front of everybody. But you know,
then you start learning some of the things that kind
of levels everything down where you can't die from a
panic attack, and so then all of a sudden you
start being like, Okay, well, no matter what happens.
Speaker 3 (09:57):
I'm gonna be I'm still going to be okay, you
know what I mean.
Speaker 4 (10:00):
I mean, And then you start understanding that when your
ears and stuff starts ringing, it's more of an alarm clock.
So a panic attack is more of an alarm clock
than like a death date. And so you start being like, okay,
all that is telling me is like, hey, you got
to find a different way to code. Hey, you got
to find a different way to think. You got to
find a different way to respond. And so once you
(10:21):
start understanding that, the power of the panic attacks and
the power of the anxiety start to go away a
little bit because you start realizing that it can't kill me,
but it can hold you back because the more and
more that you choose not to deal with it or
choose to work through it in a positive aspect, the
more and more it's going to control you and seep
(10:42):
in to all the other stuff that's going on in
your life.
Speaker 2 (10:46):
So you also spoke about by the way you said
during both of those years you had like great years.
I think was that one of the years that you
had like hundred receptions? Yeah, I think it's well. And
then but also you've said that you you had some
depression and anxiety, Like what did the depression feel like?
I know that the panic attack is the one thing,
(11:06):
but did that drive you to the depression? And then
what was the depression like?
Speaker 4 (11:10):
Yeah, well, I mean it drives you through a depression
because mentally, when you're mentally strong, that's like one of
the biggest like pros that you can have. It's like
a mental strong mind. But then all of a sudden,
whenever you become traumatic or you start dealing with stuff,
that strong mindedness starts to take over in a not
(11:30):
so good way, because now you start to over visualize
things and overthink things, and then you start feeling like
this is gonna be like the new norm and you're
gonna deal with this for the rest of your life,
and then the stuff that used to be fun aren't
in really fun anymore because it's changing your way of
thinking because of what you're dealing with. So then you
slowly start to deal with certain depressions because you just
(11:51):
start replaying things in your head.
Speaker 1 (11:53):
Over and over and over and over.
Speaker 4 (11:55):
To where it's like you can't really, you know, think
about anything else or talk about anything else. So, you know,
I think, you know, the biggest thing was like, you know,
being able to talk about it, but also being able
to make that decision that you were going to learn
how to move on while still having to learn how
to deal with certain stuff. So one day you try
(12:17):
not to talk about it as much, and then the
second day you try not to talk about it as much,
and then the third day and the fourth day you
keep doing it, and before you know it, you start
stacking days to where it doesn't have that same power
over you as it did from day one, and there's
some setbacks in those days, but then there's also okay, like,
let me do better than that last day, And as
you start doing that, you start realizing you can live
(12:39):
without some of that stuff that you were carrying, right,
and once you could live without carrying that stuff, then
you learn how to be free again.
Speaker 2 (12:46):
Yeah, well, and being free and learning those things. Did
you do therapy, Did you speak with the therapists? It
was just kind of like your own remedies that you
kind of can but whatever was times I did talk
to therapists. I talked to family, I talked to friends,
talk to people who could hear me out, who could
understand it, who would just listen. I'm not people who
(13:07):
always tried to help, but I had people who were
good at being able to give that advice, to be
able to help.
Speaker 1 (13:12):
And then I think it got to a point.
Speaker 4 (13:14):
Where, you know, when you start realizing how to control
your anxieties, the biggest thing is understanding yourself too. Because
there was times where I could talk to people, but
then you feel like you always need to talk to somebody,
and so you have to get to a place where
you're not using people as a crutch. And so like
(13:35):
for me, if I felt like therapy or like a
counselor or a friend started to become a crutch for
me because if I was talking to them, I felt better.
But then when I was maneuvering throughout my day. I
felt bad. Then it was like, Okay, now you need
to sit with yourself and learn how to be a
counselor with yourself and learn how to be therapeutic within yourself,
(13:57):
because at the end of the day, if that person
didn't answer the you can't just be like, Okay, well,
now anxiety.
Speaker 1 (14:03):
Is gonna win or impression is gonna win.
Speaker 4 (14:05):
So as you slowly started to build up that confidence
and being able to help yourself get out of it
and being able to be more positive, you start learning
that you know, anxiety and gratitude don't go together. So like,
if there's more gratitude in your life, there's less anxieties.
When you're more thankful, there's less anxieties. But when you
(14:27):
but when you become more worrisome and more fearful, it
becomes less thankfulness and less gratitude, and so that's anxiety
and depression starts to take over more So the.
Speaker 2 (14:39):
Last episode, I talked about this list that I used
to make, and every morning I would write down all
that stuff, all the things I was grateful for, all
the different blessings, all the different people that I that
I love, and that I know that loved me because
I needed that to read. Yeah, the reprogram the thoughts
I was telling myself. So for you, was that just
(15:01):
a matter of like I had to physically do that.
I did it twice a day, every morning, as soon
as I woke up, and every night before I went
to bed, I wrote I hand wrote the list every
single time. And but for you, like you know, it's different.
Was it just something you thought about or something you
wrote down, or like you just kind of spent time
by yourself just meditation, Like what was that?
Speaker 1 (15:20):
What I mean?
Speaker 4 (15:20):
You had meditations, you had floating that you could be
able to do. And there was a guy who used
to work here that I would talk to and we
found more different creative ways.
Speaker 1 (15:31):
To be able to like like to battle it.
Speaker 4 (15:33):
And so you would do stuff like, Okay, if you
liked basketball, it's you verse anxiety. And there's times where
you know you're winning, you know you're scoring layups, shooting threes,
doing jumpers, whatever. Then there's times where anxiety gets on
a fast break and the momentum is starting to swing
the other way, and sometimes you just got to call
time out. And so when you call time out, it's
(15:55):
like you start to like okay, just like you got
a minute, you'd be like cool, like okay, it had me,
but now I know how I can hold the ball.
There's no shot clock to this game, you know, So
now I'm gonna just hold it and run some plays
until I get back in control. So there was different
ways that you could be creative with doing it. There
was other times where I would sit there and it
(16:18):
was like, yeah, it's bothering me. But then you sit
there and you say okay, But I just ran around
and I was okay, that was a victory. I just
talked and that was a victory. I just thought in
my head and that was a victory. And the more
you start counting the victories that you did each second
and each minute. Oh, I might not listen to somebody
for a whole I might listen to you for thirty
(16:38):
minutes and I'm freaking out ten of those minutes, but
I'm counting those victories for the twenty minutes I didn't.
And so like you did, the more and more I
started counting the victories in my life, like, well, I
woke up and it didn't bother me. I got in
the car, it didn't bother me. So it's like, well,
it didn't bother me twenty other times, but it bothered
me this one time.
Speaker 1 (16:58):
The power starts to like only go away.
Speaker 2 (17:01):
Yeah, I like, I love the visuals that you that
you're painting there, especially the basketball one, because those that's
exactly how I had to think about it. Like, there
was one day, so I don't I don't know if
you've heard the full story, but about a year or
so ago, I just had an unbelievable meltdown and through
the NFL. I went to this place called After the
(17:22):
Impact in Manchester, Michigan, right outside of ann Arbor, and
I was there for thirty two days. There was six
former football players there and they brought every type of
therapy you can.
Speaker 3 (17:31):
Think about to the to the house.
Speaker 2 (17:33):
So it was physical therapy, cognitive therapy, recreational therapy, like
music therapy, all these these different things. And so one
day I wasn't able to get out. I slept in,
I couldn't get myself out of the bed. And because
I did that, I missed like all these appointments and
things I had the first half of the day, but
then I got up the second half of the day,
(17:54):
I got my exercise in, I scheduled all those rescheduled
all those appointments, but in my mind, I had still
lost the day because because that half day got me.
And so when I went to the therapy, the therapist
did exactly what you said. It's like, hey, but Ray,
look at all the little wins you got. You got up,
you got your work out in, you got you rescheduled
(18:14):
all of your appointments and things like that. So so
you got to count those small victories, right, because the
small victories, the small victories.
Speaker 3 (18:21):
Always come before the big ones.
Speaker 2 (18:23):
Like even if you look at it from a sports one,
like you have to win all the individual games to
get to the super Bowl.
Speaker 3 (18:28):
You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 2 (18:29):
Within those games, you got to win your one on
one combination, you know.
Speaker 3 (18:33):
You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 2 (18:33):
You got to win the practice, you got to win
your rep against your dude. So it's always the little
wins that come before the big wins. And so that's
what I try to remind myself of because some days
I can go like, man I just lost the day,
you know what I'm saying. But it's like, but man
I got up, I did well with my breakfast I'm
trying to lose weight. I got to the gym, I
saw my kids, you know, like all these different things,
(18:54):
so that that list of gratitude and those small victories
really really matter. If there's I know that the Seahawks
started a program around your mental health and what's available
for the players here One, what does that look like?
And how has that been? And then and then two
if we can just finish up with why did you
(19:15):
choose to be out front about this? And then how
has the locker room received it?
Speaker 3 (19:19):
Yeah?
Speaker 4 (19:20):
Well, I mean I think it's great to know that
the Seahawks are, you know, one of the teams that
center forefront so wanting to make a difference because in
this business that we play, you know, as you know,
it's you're taking food off of another man's play. You know,
the way that they put it is not very good therapeutic,
you know, for our for our mentals. Where are you
(19:40):
coming onto a team and people might not help you.
People are hoping that you fail. If a guy is
number two or number three, you know, or they're a
receiver that's not playing. The only way that they get
a chance to play is for your downfall. So now
you're hoping and you know, for somebody to like not
do good because then you get a chance to play.
And so all that stuff takes out the positivity because
(20:02):
you need people to fail.
Speaker 1 (20:03):
In order for you to get your shot.
Speaker 4 (20:05):
So for them to be able to do that, for
them to be able to send out, you know, counselors
and stuff like that to talk to me.
Speaker 1 (20:12):
Even when I was dealing with it, I would.
Speaker 4 (20:13):
Go to practice a little bit later, you know, miss
the first twenty thirty minutes of practice because they let
me go talk to a counselor So doing that allows
you to understand that it is more than football, and
they do have people in place to be able to
help you, to be able to talk to you about it.
And then the reason why I spoke, you know, more
about it was just because if this is something that
(20:34):
you're dealing with in silence, and this is something that
there's probably a lot of people in the world that's
dealing with it in silence. And the only reason I
knew what it was is because I had a you know,
I was blessed to be in this position for people
to tell me about it and for people to talk
to me about it.
Speaker 1 (20:49):
I didn't have to pay for therapy.
Speaker 4 (20:50):
I didn't have to pay for counselor because the team
already had that. And so there's some people who don't
have the money to do that because you know, if
we're being honest, mental health is becoming a bit your topic.
But there's more people that counselors are starting to charge over,
starting to overprice it, just because you know it's becoming
a matter. Yeah, And so to give people that free
(21:12):
you know, knowledge and being able to understand mental health
and different ways to be able to battle it, to
make it more of a fun type of competition rather
than life and death type of competition. When you change
the narrative and you change the game, because you can
always change the game in your head. And once you
change it, then you just got to fight for your
(21:33):
life to be able to continue to remind yourself about
I changed the game to this. Now we're gonna have fun.
We're just gonna do a shootout. We're gonna do a
shoot around, we're gonna play knockout, we're gonna do around
the world, We're gonna do different stuff like that. Because
whatever I can do to count those small victories, yeah,
I might be worrying and craving for this big victory.
(21:53):
But if the big victory doesn't happen, it's okay because
now I'm starting to fall in love with the small victories.
That will be enough even if the one thing that
I really want, the big victory, never happens.
Speaker 2 (22:05):
Well, I really appreciate you coming on, Tyler. I hope
that we can get you back on because there's so
much more that I want to talk.
Speaker 3 (22:11):
To you about.
Speaker 2 (22:12):
I know you have to get going. Really, Like I said,
I really do appreciate you being on again. We want
to thank Tyler Lockett for coming on and sharing some
of his story. Hopefully we'll get to have him on
for another segment because there's so much packed into what
he wants to say. Want to remind you guys again.
The Big Raise Garage Grind Mental Health Edition is presented
by the Mindful Therapy Group. The Mindful Therapy Group, based
(22:32):
in the Pacific Northwest, is a diverse group of qualified
mental health providers offering both in person and virtual care,
whether it's talk therapy or medication management. You can book
your first visit within one week. Visit Mindfulthapygroup dot com
to start your journey to better mental health today. And
like we always say at the end of our show here,
(22:54):
if you're experiencing a medical or a mental health crisis,
please reach out to your medical providers providers for assistance
and guidance. It's okay to not be okay. And number three,
if you need help and you ask for help, you're
operating from a position of power. This has been big raise,
(23:14):
Garage Grind, Mister Health Edition, Peace in Amount,
You're listening to Big Raised Garage, grind.
Speaker 2 (00:04):
I want to bring awareness and my voice to something
that's meaningful and purposeful, more than just who's the best
football player, who's the best football team?
Speaker 1 (00:11):
The intersection between life, football and mental health.
Speaker 2 (00:15):
When you need help and you ask for help, you're
operating from a position of power. When you need help
and you don't ask for help, that's the weakness.
Speaker 1 (00:24):
Now here's your host, Seahawk's Legend, Ray Roberts.
Speaker 2 (00:28):
What is up?
Speaker 3 (00:29):
Fam?
Speaker 2 (00:30):
This is the Big Raise Garage Ryan, brought to you
by the Mindful Therapy Group, and I am your host,
Big Ray, And today I'm super excited because little does
Tyler know, but from the very beginning of this podcast
and this effort, he was like the number one dude
on my list to get in to get into the room.
Speaker 3 (00:49):
And I know we didn't have time.
Speaker 2 (00:52):
We wanted to kick off the season with Tyler, but
the way the season is going and how busy you
guys are, wasn't able to do that. But we are
super excited today to be able to talk to the
one and the only mister Tyler Lockett and so of
you guys that don't know about Tyler Tyler's been a
first team All Pro. He is like if you include
like the playoffs, he has over eight thousand yards receiving
(01:12):
in sixty I think touchdowns for the sea Hawks. For
the Seahawks, He's been to the Pro Bowl. He's a
team captain. He's just like a mister Everything's dude, a
renaissance kind of guy to me, real estate broker or agent,
one of the two. And so just excited to have
you here, man, and just to kind of get things
started just a little bit. You know, we talked a
(01:35):
little bit about your football endeavors and things. You're not
the biggest dude in the world. Yeah, what motivated you
and what drove you to football? For guys your size, Yeah, well,
I mean, you know, my family was a sports family,
so I was always introduced to sports at a young age.
Played basketball, football, baseball, and so like playing multiple sports
(01:57):
helps you to be able to, like play football really
great because when you're playing basketball, you're working on your
quickness when you're and you're working on understanding the plays
how it's supposed to develop people getting open. You play baseball,
it's more of the hand eye coordination and even when
you do stuff like run track.
Speaker 1 (02:14):
I mean, it's helping you build up your speed.
Speaker 4 (02:17):
And so, you know, being born in a sports family,
having an opportunity to understand that my best chance was
to go in football through the scholarships and stuff that
we get for full rides, and then after that it's
just mastering your craft. My faith always drove me to
want to be great and glorify God and everything that
I do. And so just having that opportunity to play
football and try to master my craft has helped me
(02:39):
get to this spot as well.
Speaker 3 (02:41):
I feel you.
Speaker 2 (02:41):
And then also you know, we always I wish we
could find a different way to say it, but we
always say man title Locket is the most underrated receiver
in the league. And it almost seems like even saying
it that way speaks it like kind of pushes you down.
It's like, but what is it? Why do you think
that other receivers get more attention? Then you get like
(03:02):
around here, we know who you are and what you
do and what you bring into it. The toe taps
and you know, a ability to get open when people
are scrambling, just find the opening spot. All these different
kinds of things. But why do you think that maybe
you don't get some of the I don't want to
say respect, but recognition.
Speaker 4 (03:18):
I guess, yeah, Well, I think a lot of it
too depends on the market that you're in.
Speaker 2 (03:22):
Uh.
Speaker 4 (03:22):
You know, because we're out on the West Coast. There's
not a lot of people across the world that really
get to watch us play. And so when you're looking
at the teams that's in the Midwest or the South
or the East, a lot of people are more in
tuned with being able to watch them. Then you're talking
about like the marketing of teams you're talking about. I
think even when you look at what you want a
(03:43):
receiver to be, people don't really you know, look at
me as the first candidate, or even probably the top
five candidates. It's just people like to look at a
receiver as you know, speed, and so then they quickly
find somebody for speed, they look at somebody for height,
they say this is what it has to be. They
find somebody that's like creative and savvy, and they say, well,
(04:07):
this is what a receiver's supposed to look like.
Speaker 1 (04:09):
But I think for me, I'm just like a football player.
Speaker 4 (04:12):
And because of that, it's like, well, there's not one
thing that they could pinpoint that says this is what
makes him a top notch receiver. It's just Okay, he
does everything right, he's in the right spot, Okay, he
makes the catch, Okay, he gets the yards. But there's
nothing like electrifying about him to say he should be
in this category as other receivers. And so I also
(04:34):
think too, like we have so many great receivers here.
We do a great job trying to get everybody involved,
and I think sometimes when you look at how other
teams are, players get way more opportunities to be featured
and stuff like that, which allows them to have that
chance early on in their career.
Speaker 1 (04:51):
Yeah, to be that guy.
Speaker 2 (04:53):
Yeah, well I will tell you, dude, like there's I've
had the opportunity with this podcast. I interviewed Doug Goldwin,
Cliff April kJ Wright and now interviewing you, and I
can't pick four other Seahawks that I would rather interview.
Speaker 3 (05:07):
You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 2 (05:08):
You guys all bring such uniqueness to this topic and
also to the team, and you're so involved in the community.
I think those are great things. But I know that
we don't have you for a long time, So I
want to kind of just kind of jump right into
it a little bit. You know, this podcast was created
to one tell my story around my mental health journey.
Two was to kind of debunk the idea of the
(05:30):
stigma around mental health for athletes and for.
Speaker 3 (05:34):
Black dudes specifically.
Speaker 2 (05:38):
And then three was to kind of show the listeners
and the viewers the humanity of who we are, because
so many times we're just a helmet in paths.
Speaker 3 (05:47):
You know what I'm saying with.
Speaker 2 (05:48):
These caricatures of gladiators that don't bleed, don't cry, don't have.
Speaker 3 (05:52):
Emotions, all those kinds of things.
Speaker 2 (05:53):
And so what I'd like to do is I know
that you know, I think it was last year or
a couple of years ago where you posted that two
out of the seven years that you played in the
league that you were playing through some type of trauma
and that you were dealing with depression and anxiety. If
you're willing to be vulnerable enough, can you walk us
through those two situations and like kind of what was
(06:15):
going on and during those times?
Speaker 4 (06:17):
Yeah, well, I mean I think each ones are different. Like,
you know, there was one time, think going into the
end of my third year, I had my first panic attack.
You know, never knew what it was, and so that
stuff makes you feel like you're going to die right
off the top, you know, so you have a panic attack.
They really say that there's no difference in figuring out
what's a panic attack and what's a heart attack, and
(06:39):
just having to go through that whole experience kind of
messes you up because you know, you go to the hospital,
you know, the doctors are trying to figure out what's
going on. They're asking if you took cocaine and oh,
you know all this stuff, and you're saying no, and
they're like, well, are you sure, like you know, maybe
you did and you didn't know, like you know, so
it makes you like start freaking out even more, making
(07:01):
the experience even worse. And so, you know, then learning
and understanding like how to maneuver through that and work
through that because sometimes you know, nobody knows what it's
like to die until you feel like you're about to die.
And even though that wasn't the case that I was
about to die, it still felt like that, like a
near death type of experience, and so then it starts
(07:22):
to mess with you mentally. You start to think that
it's going to happen again over and over. You start to,
like slowly you start to add in like that fear
and trauma into other circumstances that's going on in life
that didn't have anything to do with it, but now
you're just if you can't control it early, you start
(07:44):
allowing it to like creep into other areas to where
now it becomes something that's uncontrollable and hard to be
able to maintain. And so, you know, I had to
go through that, play through that, and I think it's
a daily battle that you had to learn and had to,
you know, learn how to overcome and go through things
that you go through, you know, within your your circle,
(08:05):
or your families, or you know, whatever the case is.
You got to learn how to be able to overcome that.
But sometimes, like I said, it takes days, it takes months,
it takes years, it takes talking to other people. But
you know, you also learn how to be great in
every situation. You know, if you can only be great
when you have a sound mind, then I feel like
(08:26):
you're missing a point of learning how you can still
be able to operate and be great when you have,
you know, not so much of a sound mind. You know,
like you might be going through it mentally. But if
you feel like you can only be free when you're
not going through it mentally, then you're always going to
struggle when you go through it mentally. So sometimes you
got to be your how we are our worst critic,
(08:48):
You also got to be your biggest supporter, right, And
the more and more that you realize like, oh, nothing's happening,
the more and more that you take its power away.
Speaker 3 (08:58):
I feel it.
Speaker 2 (08:59):
So when you so the panic attack thing, I can
identify way because I've dealt with the same thing. But
it can be different for everyone, you know, for different people.
So for me, I couldn't get myself to go out
the door, so I would look at the door knob
and then for some reason, like my heart would start racing,
I couldn't breathe, my chest would get super tight, and
(09:20):
I could not get I was blocked three hundred pund
dudes in my life, you know, for career, and I couldn't.
I couldn't turn the knob on a one pound door,
you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 3 (09:28):
So for you, what what did it feel like like?
Did it like? Did it?
Speaker 2 (09:32):
Was it the same type of elements like tightness and
tightness of the chest, breathing like.
Speaker 1 (09:37):
Well, yeah, it was the same stuff I think.
Speaker 4 (09:39):
You know, it gives you the social anxiety because then
you don't want to go outside because you think it's
going to happen again in front of everybody. But you know,
then you start learning some of the things that kind
of levels everything down where you can't die from a
panic attack, and so then all of a sudden you
start being like, Okay, well, no matter what happens.
Speaker 3 (09:57):
I'm gonna be I'm still going to be okay, you
know what I mean.
Speaker 4 (10:00):
I mean, And then you start understanding that when your
ears and stuff starts ringing, it's more of an alarm clock.
So a panic attack is more of an alarm clock
than like a death date. And so you start being like, okay,
all that is telling me is like, hey, you got
to find a different way to code. Hey, you got
to find a different way to think. You got to
find a different way to respond. And so once you
(10:21):
start understanding that, the power of the panic attacks and
the power of the anxiety start to go away a
little bit because you start realizing that it can't kill me,
but it can hold you back because the more and
more that you choose not to deal with it or
choose to work through it in a positive aspect, the
more and more it's going to control you and seep
(10:42):
in to all the other stuff that's going on in
your life.
Speaker 2 (10:46):
So you also spoke about by the way you said
during both of those years you had like great years.
I think was that one of the years that you
had like hundred receptions? Yeah, I think it's well. And
then but also you've said that you you had some
depression and anxiety, Like what did the depression feel like?
I know that the panic attack is the one thing,
(11:06):
but did that drive you to the depression? And then
what was the depression like?
Speaker 4 (11:10):
Yeah, well, I mean it drives you through a depression
because mentally, when you're mentally strong, that's like one of
the biggest like pros that you can have. It's like
a mental strong mind. But then all of a sudden,
whenever you become traumatic or you start dealing with stuff,
that strong mindedness starts to take over in a not
(11:30):
so good way, because now you start to over visualize
things and overthink things, and then you start feeling like
this is gonna be like the new norm and you're
gonna deal with this for the rest of your life,
and then the stuff that used to be fun aren't
in really fun anymore because it's changing your way of
thinking because of what you're dealing with. So then you
slowly start to deal with certain depressions because you just
(11:51):
start replaying things in your head.
Speaker 1 (11:53):
Over and over and over and over.
Speaker 4 (11:55):
To where it's like you can't really, you know, think
about anything else or talk about anything else. So, you know,
I think, you know, the biggest thing was like, you know,
being able to talk about it, but also being able
to make that decision that you were going to learn
how to move on while still having to learn how
to deal with certain stuff. So one day you try
(12:17):
not to talk about it as much, and then the
second day you try not to talk about it as much,
and then the third day and the fourth day you
keep doing it, and before you know it, you start
stacking days to where it doesn't have that same power
over you as it did from day one, and there's
some setbacks in those days, but then there's also okay, like,
let me do better than that last day, And as
you start doing that, you start realizing you can live
(12:39):
without some of that stuff that you were carrying, right,
and once you could live without carrying that stuff, then
you learn how to be free again.
Speaker 2 (12:46):
Yeah, well, and being free and learning those things. Did
you do therapy, Did you speak with the therapists? It
was just kind of like your own remedies that you
kind of can but whatever was times I did talk
to therapists. I talked to family, I talked to friends,
talk to people who could hear me out, who could
understand it, who would just listen. I'm not people who
(13:07):
always tried to help, but I had people who were
good at being able to give that advice, to be
able to help.
Speaker 1 (13:12):
And then I think it got to a point.
Speaker 4 (13:14):
Where, you know, when you start realizing how to control
your anxieties, the biggest thing is understanding yourself too. Because
there was times where I could talk to people, but
then you feel like you always need to talk to somebody,
and so you have to get to a place where
you're not using people as a crutch. And so like
(13:35):
for me, if I felt like therapy or like a
counselor or a friend started to become a crutch for
me because if I was talking to them, I felt better.
But then when I was maneuvering throughout my day. I
felt bad. Then it was like, Okay, now you need
to sit with yourself and learn how to be a
counselor with yourself and learn how to be therapeutic within yourself,
(13:57):
because at the end of the day, if that person
didn't answer the you can't just be like, Okay, well,
now anxiety.
Speaker 1 (14:03):
Is gonna win or impression is gonna win.
Speaker 4 (14:05):
So as you slowly started to build up that confidence
and being able to help yourself get out of it
and being able to be more positive, you start learning
that you know, anxiety and gratitude don't go together. So like,
if there's more gratitude in your life, there's less anxieties.
When you're more thankful, there's less anxieties. But when you
(14:27):
but when you become more worrisome and more fearful, it
becomes less thankfulness and less gratitude, and so that's anxiety
and depression starts to take over more So the.
Speaker 2 (14:39):
Last episode, I talked about this list that I used
to make, and every morning I would write down all
that stuff, all the things I was grateful for, all
the different blessings, all the different people that I that
I love, and that I know that loved me because
I needed that to read. Yeah, the reprogram the thoughts
I was telling myself. So for you, was that just
(15:01):
a matter of like I had to physically do that.
I did it twice a day, every morning, as soon
as I woke up, and every night before I went
to bed, I wrote I hand wrote the list every
single time. And but for you, like you know, it's different.
Was it just something you thought about or something you
wrote down, or like you just kind of spent time
by yourself just meditation, Like what was that?
Speaker 1 (15:20):
What I mean?
Speaker 4 (15:20):
You had meditations, you had floating that you could be
able to do. And there was a guy who used
to work here that I would talk to and we
found more different creative ways.
Speaker 1 (15:31):
To be able to like like to battle it.
Speaker 4 (15:33):
And so you would do stuff like, Okay, if you
liked basketball, it's you verse anxiety. And there's times where
you know you're winning, you know you're scoring layups, shooting threes,
doing jumpers, whatever. Then there's times where anxiety gets on
a fast break and the momentum is starting to swing
the other way, and sometimes you just got to call
time out. And so when you call time out, it's
(15:55):
like you start to like okay, just like you got
a minute, you'd be like cool, like okay, it had me,
but now I know how I can hold the ball.
There's no shot clock to this game, you know, So
now I'm gonna just hold it and run some plays
until I get back in control. So there was different
ways that you could be creative with doing it. There
was other times where I would sit there and it
(16:18):
was like, yeah, it's bothering me. But then you sit
there and you say okay, But I just ran around
and I was okay, that was a victory. I just
talked and that was a victory. I just thought in
my head and that was a victory. And the more
you start counting the victories that you did each second
and each minute. Oh, I might not listen to somebody
for a whole I might listen to you for thirty
(16:38):
minutes and I'm freaking out ten of those minutes, but
I'm counting those victories for the twenty minutes I didn't.
And so like you did, the more and more I
started counting the victories in my life, like, well, I
woke up and it didn't bother me. I got in
the car, it didn't bother me. So it's like, well,
it didn't bother me twenty other times, but it bothered
me this one time.
Speaker 1 (16:58):
The power starts to like only go away.
Speaker 2 (17:01):
Yeah, I like, I love the visuals that you that
you're painting there, especially the basketball one, because those that's
exactly how I had to think about it. Like, there
was one day, so I don't I don't know if
you've heard the full story, but about a year or
so ago, I just had an unbelievable meltdown and through
the NFL. I went to this place called After the
(17:22):
Impact in Manchester, Michigan, right outside of ann Arbor, and
I was there for thirty two days. There was six
former football players there and they brought every type of
therapy you can.
Speaker 3 (17:31):
Think about to the to the house.
Speaker 2 (17:33):
So it was physical therapy, cognitive therapy, recreational therapy, like
music therapy, all these these different things. And so one
day I wasn't able to get out. I slept in,
I couldn't get myself out of the bed. And because
I did that, I missed like all these appointments and
things I had the first half of the day, but
then I got up the second half of the day,
(17:54):
I got my exercise in, I scheduled all those rescheduled
all those appointments, but in my mind, I had still
lost the day because because that half day got me.
And so when I went to the therapy, the therapist
did exactly what you said. It's like, hey, but Ray,
look at all the little wins you got. You got up,
you got your work out in, you got you rescheduled
(18:14):
all of your appointments and things like that. So so
you got to count those small victories, right, because the
small victories, the small victories.
Speaker 3 (18:21):
Always come before the big ones.
Speaker 2 (18:23):
Like even if you look at it from a sports one,
like you have to win all the individual games to
get to the super Bowl.
Speaker 3 (18:28):
You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 2 (18:29):
Within those games, you got to win your one on
one combination, you know.
Speaker 3 (18:33):
You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 2 (18:33):
You got to win the practice, you got to win
your rep against your dude. So it's always the little
wins that come before the big wins. And so that's
what I try to remind myself of because some days
I can go like, man I just lost the day,
you know what I'm saying. But it's like, but man
I got up, I did well with my breakfast I'm
trying to lose weight. I got to the gym, I
saw my kids, you know, like all these different things,
(18:54):
so that that list of gratitude and those small victories
really really matter. If there's I know that the Seahawks
started a program around your mental health and what's available
for the players here One, what does that look like?
And how has that been? And then and then two
if we can just finish up with why did you
(19:15):
choose to be out front about this? And then how
has the locker room received it?
Speaker 3 (19:19):
Yeah?
Speaker 4 (19:20):
Well, I mean I think it's great to know that
the Seahawks are, you know, one of the teams that
center forefront so wanting to make a difference because in
this business that we play, you know, as you know,
it's you're taking food off of another man's play. You know,
the way that they put it is not very good therapeutic,
you know, for our for our mentals. Where are you
(19:40):
coming onto a team and people might not help you.
People are hoping that you fail. If a guy is
number two or number three, you know, or they're a
receiver that's not playing. The only way that they get
a chance to play is for your downfall. So now
you're hoping and you know, for somebody to like not
do good because then you get a chance to play.
And so all that stuff takes out the positivity because
(20:02):
you need people to fail.
Speaker 1 (20:03):
In order for you to get your shot.
Speaker 4 (20:05):
So for them to be able to do that, for
them to be able to send out, you know, counselors
and stuff like that to talk to me.
Speaker 1 (20:12):
Even when I was dealing with it, I would.
Speaker 4 (20:13):
Go to practice a little bit later, you know, miss
the first twenty thirty minutes of practice because they let
me go talk to a counselor So doing that allows
you to understand that it is more than football, and
they do have people in place to be able to
help you, to be able to talk to you about it.
And then the reason why I spoke, you know, more
about it was just because if this is something that
(20:34):
you're dealing with in silence, and this is something that
there's probably a lot of people in the world that's
dealing with it in silence. And the only reason I
knew what it was is because I had a you know,
I was blessed to be in this position for people
to tell me about it and for people to talk
to me about it.
Speaker 1 (20:49):
I didn't have to pay for therapy.
Speaker 4 (20:50):
I didn't have to pay for counselor because the team
already had that. And so there's some people who don't
have the money to do that because you know, if
we're being honest, mental health is becoming a bit your topic.
But there's more people that counselors are starting to charge over,
starting to overprice it, just because you know it's becoming
a matter. Yeah, And so to give people that free
(21:12):
you know, knowledge and being able to understand mental health
and different ways to be able to battle it, to
make it more of a fun type of competition rather
than life and death type of competition. When you change
the narrative and you change the game, because you can
always change the game in your head. And once you
change it, then you just got to fight for your
(21:33):
life to be able to continue to remind yourself about
I changed the game to this. Now we're gonna have fun.
We're just gonna do a shootout. We're gonna do a
shoot around, we're gonna play knockout, we're gonna do around
the world, We're gonna do different stuff like that. Because
whatever I can do to count those small victories, yeah,
I might be worrying and craving for this big victory.
(21:53):
But if the big victory doesn't happen, it's okay because
now I'm starting to fall in love with the small victories.
That will be enough even if the one thing that
I really want, the big victory, never happens.
Speaker 2 (22:05):
Well, I really appreciate you coming on, Tyler. I hope
that we can get you back on because there's so
much more that I want to talk.
Speaker 3 (22:11):
To you about.
Speaker 2 (22:12):
I know you have to get going. Really, Like I said,
I really do appreciate you being on again. We want
to thank Tyler Lockett for coming on and sharing some
of his story. Hopefully we'll get to have him on
for another segment because there's so much packed into what
he wants to say. Want to remind you guys again.
The Big Raise Garage Grind Mental Health Edition is presented
by the Mindful Therapy Group. The Mindful Therapy Group, based
(22:32):
in the Pacific Northwest, is a diverse group of qualified
mental health providers offering both in person and virtual care,
whether it's talk therapy or medication management. You can book
your first visit within one week. Visit Mindfulthapygroup dot com
to start your journey to better mental health today. And
like we always say at the end of our show here,
(22:54):
if you're experiencing a medical or a mental health crisis,
please reach out to your medical providers providers for assistance
and guidance. It's okay to not be okay. And number three,
if you need help and you ask for help, you're
operating from a position of power. This has been big raise,
(23:14):
Garage Grind, Mister Health Edition, Peace in Amount,
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