April 17, 2024 • 33 mins
Kristen Balboni welcomes Meredith Tucker, mother of Pearl Monroe Tucker, happily nicknamed Roe Roe. The duo dives into the emotional journey behind Roe Roe's battle with Leukemia and how she keeps her family strong during this difficult time. Tucker shares the celebratory moment when Roe Roe rang the victory bell at Atrium Health Levine Children’s Brenner Children’s Hospital.
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:03):
So we've become advocates for childhood cancer. We've met with
Governor Roy Cooper and other local leaders to bring more
attention to childhood cancer. Our goal is to be a
louder voice and bring awareness and attention, like I said,
to the lack of funding for childhood cancer research. Only
four percent of our federal research dollars go to childhood
(00:26):
cancer research. That's it. We didn't know any of this
until our journey, and so now we want to be
a louder voice. We want to bring awareness and educate.
Speaker 2 (00:39):
Welcome to Season three of the Inspire Her Podcasts, presented
by Atrium Health. I'm your host, Kristen Balboni, and this
is a podcast series for Panthers fans where we highlight
admirable women from across the Carolinas as they share stories
and lessons from their lives and careers.
Speaker 3 (00:55):
And you know, when.
Speaker 2 (00:57):
We talk about stories that need to be told and
need to be shared, that is exactly what today's episode
is all about. My guest today, Meredith Tucker, is here
to share her family story of resilience and perseverance during
an incredibly tough time.
Speaker 3 (01:14):
So, Meredith, thank you so so much for joining me. Today.
Speaker 1 (01:18):
Oh, thank you so much for having me. I appreciate
the you guys inviting and being willing to hear my story,
So thank you.
Speaker 3 (01:27):
Well. Absolutely.
Speaker 2 (01:28):
You know, when Adriam Hill told me about your story,
I was like, we have to we have to talk
to Meredith and hear more about Roilroad's journey. We're going
to get into all of that, but first, just as
we get started, Meredith, you know, like we said, this
is a podcast really focused on women in the Carolina,
So can you tell me a little bit about you
(01:50):
and your family.
Speaker 1 (01:53):
Yeah, so I've been married four ten years going on
almost eleven. We have three kids. They all have double names.
My oldest is it's a girl, Carson Perry. She's not.
Then we've got her home and Roe, who was now
(02:13):
actually today is her birthday. She's turned seven. And then
we have number three, Franklin Reeves, and he is getting
ready to turn three in a few days.
Speaker 2 (02:26):
So goodness, what a busy time for your family right now.
Birthday parties and all of that.
Speaker 1 (02:33):
Yes, it's just it's crazy. So he came two weeks early,
so I was like, oh my god, birthdays like this
is going to be fun. Welcome to joint birthday parties. Yeah,
just do what you gotta do. And I'm married to
Chad Tucker. He is a local TV journalist here in
(02:55):
the Triad area. I am a license cosmetology just and
business owner. So our family is very busy. They were
just super busy. And then as far as hobbies and
things like that, it's always joke and I'm like, well,
I'm the kids, uber, I'm the chef and like all
(03:19):
of those things. So that's sort of my hobbies.
Speaker 3 (03:22):
So yeah, how would you have time for anything else?
Speaker 1 (03:27):
Yeah, exactly, it's just yeah, doing everything for them, but
I wouldn't have it any other way.
Speaker 2 (03:33):
So absolutely, and happy birthday to Pearl Monroe. As we
said that, she's known affectionately as row Row, so that's
what I'm gonna call her. Even though I've never had
a chance to meet her, I feel like I know her,
so very very happy birthday to her today.
Speaker 3 (03:50):
Yeah, and that's really.
Speaker 2 (03:52):
Why we're here is to is to talk about her journey.
Speaker 3 (03:57):
So I know when Row Row was three.
Speaker 2 (04:00):
As a family, you've got some just absolutely devastating news.
I'm wondering if you can kind of share what I
know just must be you know, painful to talk about.
Speaker 3 (04:10):
A tough time for your family.
Speaker 1 (04:13):
Definitely a hard time. So the start of the story,
it was November of twenty nineteen. She was three and
a half and then my oldest daughter, Carson Perry was
five at the time, just started in kindergarten that fall.
So we first started noticing personality changes. She became really clingy,
(04:37):
She started having some verbal complaints of some different body
aches and pains, and you know, I chalked it up
to growing pains. But then that became around the clock.
Well normally that's something that's kind of you know, at nighttime,
but it was around the clock when and then of
course all these complaints, well it actually I started halloweing night.
(05:02):
She wanted to end going trick or treating, come back
home early. And that was really the start of as like, oh,
that's kind but then all of these then all the
complaints and things started coming, which then led to lots
of doctor visits, which I call ping ponging between all
these doctors X rays, like why is her arm hurting
(05:25):
but there's no fracture, there's no fractures, there's no like
did she fall trying to piece it together? What like
something I just knew some of them just was not right.
As this was about a three week span of trying
to figure out what was going on, our legs began
to ache severely, like I was saying. And also, let
(05:47):
me remind you, I was twenty weeks pregnant.
Speaker 2 (05:49):
I was just thinking about that when you were saying
the age differences and how close their birthdays are. I thought, oh,
my gosh, and you must have been pregnant going through
all this. I can't imagine the stress and the confusion
and how worried you must have been.
Speaker 1 (06:03):
Yeah, so, of course, bringing number three into the family,
I was already like, oh, this is already gonna be
We're gonna be outnumbered, you know. There was just that alone,
and then then all these things started happening, which then
so her legs began to ache, which then on my birthday,
November nineteenth, she started crawling because being was hurting so much.
(06:28):
She wasn't screaming in pain constantly, but it was like
it was just a little more and more verbal complaints,
to the point that she found a way of just
crawling because it felt better to crawl than walk. So
once that happened, I said this is it. We're going back,
We're going to get a CBC panel done, and sure enough,
(06:51):
her white blood cell count was out the roof, which
then led to an appointment at Grinner Children's Hospital, which
we love so much. They've been phenomenal through everything. So
we went to the appointment and just kind of, you know,
re explained everything the scenarios that had led up to
(07:12):
this point. And we we get in there and you know,
doctor Cram was her doctor, and he is incredible, and
he's like, yeah, you know, he's checking her out and thinking,
you know, you know, maybe it's a mono, maybe it's
you know, something else. Worst case scenario it would be leukemia.
(07:33):
But if it is leukemia, there's a cure and you
know she'll be fine. And you know, just being there
at the hospital and I was just like, oh my gosh,
like why are we here? What is it? You know,
it's just my I'm my nerves are really working at
this point and I'm just like shaking all day. And
(07:55):
so they did more blood work to you know, just
really analyze everything, and then there wasn't much left for
us to do at that point. So then we went
I went home. I canceled work for the day. I
was doing hair, a full time licensed cosmetologist, and then
Chad goes back to work because we you know, we
(08:16):
don't really know what we're waiting on or what phone
caller is, you know, what kind of information we're going
to get. But I at this point had a migraine
because I just knew like something was just going on,
and it took until about three thirty for us to
find out news. So Chad went to work. Doctor Cram
(08:38):
called Chad and told him over the phone only because
I was pregnant. He would never normally do that. COVID
had not even started at this point, but he wanted
to be taught the Chad first to figure out how
to tell me because I was pregnant, so he did Chad.
Chad immediately left work. He was supposed to do the
(09:00):
newscast at four o'clock, and he went in told his bosse,
he said, I've got to leave. I've got to go home.
You're gonna have to find someone else to cover. They
had to grab another anchor fill in immediately, and he
came home. He didn't even call me on the way home.
He just sat in silence, driving trying to figure out,
(09:21):
you know, process this information, how he's going to tell me.
And then he comes in our door and I'm sitting
here with Roro. My daughter was I think my mother
had picked her up from school, and Roro is just
kind of crawling around. She's not crying or anything, but
she's just kind of hanging with me, and I'm sitting
(09:42):
here pregnant. Then Chad comes in the door and I'm thinking,
I'm getting ready to see him on the news. And
he comes in and he has his hands in his
pockets and he looks at me, and I knew. I
knew something was wrong because he came in. Normally he
would call me on his way home, but he didn't.
He just walked in and he just said, and I'm
so sorry, but you got leukemia. And just lost it.
(10:07):
We just lost it because I just knew there was
that underlying it. Just everything was starting to add up
and it wasn't making sense. And so that was it.
So we, you know, cried and fell apart, and I
was a mess, a mess, and you know, we so
(10:27):
then we ended up. We took Roro went back to
the hospital. Doctor kran let us ask all the questions
in the world. He was one hundred percent there with us,
like answered, everything helped us through everything. And in that
moment when as soon as I heard the news and
find of process, it just felt absolutely gut wrenching that
(10:52):
like our world had been flipped upside down in a
matter of seconds. I was pregnant, I had a job,
another child, literally like what do you do? What do
we do? Is she going to be okay? Is she
gonna make it? Like? Where do we go next? How
do we do this? Where do we go first? You know,
it's just everything floods your mind and I honestly felt
(11:16):
like a part of me died at that moment. It
just felt like this line in the sand like this,
it just felt like a part of is just fell off,
like literally just died. Even though she was there still
in front of me, everything was there, but it was
just like this. It's so hard to explain it, just
so many emotions wrapped in that moment is it's hard
(11:39):
to even like verbalize. So the next thing you do,
you just you just have to keep moving because you
have to. You can't just stop and quit. So the
next thing we do, we go to the hospital. We
fear out our plan. The next morning she was already
scheduled for to get her port put in and start
(12:00):
chemo immediately, you know, and then also trying to explain
this to our daughter, our five year old, like what
how our life just got flipped upside down? She thinks
there's nothing else going on, you know, everything seems normal
until you know, we start explaining we've got to go
(12:20):
to the hospital. At the hospital, she starts hearing that
all the time, And so explain that Roro has got
some sick bugs in her body, and God made these
incredible doctors, super smart and they are going to help
battle these bad guys and make her better. So, you know,
on a five year old's level, you've got to explain
(12:42):
it so they can understand how our life is getting rechange.
So we go to the hospital and you know, everything
starts rolling and plans start. I felt better once we
got the care plan. Then I kind of had idea
of what was going on. I knew she was going
to be okay. It was going to be a long,
(13:04):
long journey two and a half years. Actually it's even
longer for boys. However, some research is saying it's maybe
not quite as long now, but about two and a
half years for girls. Although leukemia allb cel. What she
had is the the longest care plan but the most
(13:28):
cured childhood cancer, thankfully, whereas some are like super you know,
even more serious cancers, but they are a shorter window
of treatment. It's it's crazy. Let's see. So we got
the blood work and we got so we had everything
(13:48):
rolling the care plan, and then our community was absolutely
unbelievable how they just rallied around us. They came right
around us, supporting us, to a messages, you know, sending meals,
all of those things, and we are so so so
thankful for all of that.
Speaker 2 (14:10):
Absolutely, And Meredith, you know, I'm just as you're telling
this story, I feel like I'm there with you, and
as a parent myself, I just can't like I'm emotional
hearing the story. I can't imagine what that must have
been like. And I just I so appreciate you taking
us through it moment by moment because I see what
(14:31):
you're saying where you're saying like there was a before
time and then there's now and you know all of
the different things that you and your family and Rowro
are navigating. But one thing that stuck out to me
that you said, is that the doctors told you that
if this is the case, and then when it was
the case, if it is leukemia.
Speaker 3 (14:50):
That she'll be Okay, what is it?
Speaker 2 (14:53):
Yeah, and you said, it's a two and a half
year treatment. So what is it like to have that
reassurance to know that no matter you know, as hard
as it gets for her and for all of you,
that I imagine you had, like you said, full faith
in in the treatment and the doctors, and that had
to provide a little bit of of of solace, right
(15:18):
of of just a little bit of relief that at
the end of this tunnel there's going to be an
end in sight.
Speaker 1 (15:26):
Yeah, it was. It was still messy though in the middle.
I mean, the beginning is the new middle is so messy,
and then the end it's like we're almost there, Like
this is where you know, they said we were get
and we're almost there. The mess the middle is just
so messy. As far as all of the meds and
(15:46):
you talk about a three year old on steroids, I
mean that is like there's no other it's a necessary evil,
but it is unbelievable how a child feels like because
they can't you know, really rests how they feel. I know,
they feel like they're crawing out of their skin. They're
like they're awake, they're they're high, they're low, they're hungry,
they're they're digestive system is all out of whack, and
(16:09):
it makes everybody out of whack. And then you know,
there was also funny times too. So we joked because
I was pregnant and I felt like she was acting
like she was pregnant, like she was eating all the
time high and there was a point where her belly
got so distended, her belly button was flat, just like
mine had gotten craving spaghetti and pickles and everything spicy
(16:33):
because the steroids just make your taste buds. I don't know,
it's like you can't taste it good enough, so they
want super spicy type foods.
Speaker 3 (16:46):
But it, oh, please go ahead.
Speaker 1 (16:49):
It just you know, it was just very hard and messy,
and you know, we we had our support, We had
so much support, and it was incredible. But there are
times I will tell you it got only because in
the very beginning, everybody runs to you and surrounds you.
But then as after two years and a few months,
like it gets pretty quiet and like we're still trudging
(17:12):
through the mud and the scary times and the messy part.
So I mean we definitely had you know, people would
send the you know, phone calls and text and things
like that. We were so appreciative and meals and things
like that, and but you know, people get to a
point where they just don't really know what to do
(17:33):
sometimes and they don't know what this and so I
mean the part of that, you know, got really hard
because you need that continuous support. It's just so important
for somebody because it doesn't end eventually hopefully, but in
the middle it's you know, you're not close to the
end yet.
Speaker 2 (17:53):
So no, if anyone can think about just how long
two and a half years are, you know what anyone
listening right now, I was doing two and a half
years ago. To think that that is the time length
that you have to go through this, and that she
has to go through this, it's just it's it's such
a long time. What is it like as a parent,
(18:14):
you know, having to watch your little girl go through
all of this.
Speaker 1 (18:21):
I mean it's devastating because you just know their little
body is fighting so hard, like their immune system gets
wiped out. All vaccinations are wiped out, like she's fighting
for life. Like she lost her hair, which in the
beginning it took a little while for it to start shedding.
She held on to it for a pretty good while
(18:41):
that it was thinning, and then literally by the time
I had my son, it like she was bald. But
there's so much power too, I feel like in seeing
her as a little bald, cute, bald little baby toddler. Still,
I mean, it's just like she is my hero. And
I always say, you know, not a lot of people
(19:03):
have met their heroes, but I gave birth to mine
and it's gonna that she is my hero, so you know.
And then so four months later, after the diagnosis, COVID
comes along. It's creeping around the corner and I'm still
pregnant at this point. So COVID comes, Chad becomes, he
(19:29):
comes home and begins doing the news from home. Now
imagine that like two kids went on steroids. There's camera
cords likes things all strength in my house like craziness.
Then my five year old then because she starts doing
virtual school. At this point, everything's trying to keep germs
(19:52):
and you know, infections and COVID, the unknown everything away
from my sick child, and you know, it just became
so hard. Then people couldn't really visit, It couldn't help
as much physically because of the risk of everything COVID
and with Roro. And honestly, it was so interesting because
(20:17):
we kind of were already living that COVID style, I
guess you'd say, because we had masks and all that
time and protect Roro. Then the world came in and started,
you know, living the way we had already started living
the four months before, because you know, it's all about germs.
You didn't want to get sick because then it was
centered to the hospital. So then where it gets crazy
(20:41):
crazy arth COVID is really starting to amp up. I'm
due with Franklin Reeves my son April eleventh. Well, he
decides to come on April first, and I'm walking around
on March thirty first, telling Chad while he's like on
the news, I think my water broke. I mean my
water broke, and sure enough it did. And uh so
(21:08):
then I end up, you know, going to the hospital
and delivering two weeks early. And Roro is also in
the middle of a second really hard phase of steroids
and another round of all kinds of crazy meds. Our
hair was falling out, and she really at this point
looked like the poster child of like a sick cancer patient.
And then I'm also bringing in a new born at
(21:29):
this point who we always say he was like a
bright light in our storm. And it was a very
dark time because even though it was still hard, he
it was a beautiful distraction for us. It's and from COVID,
and I mean it was very hard. It just really was,
(21:50):
you know, a new horn, not sleeping, a child and
you know, having roid rage and the five year old
trying to keep normalcy for her, and then our marriage
and you know, literally juggling everything. It was just, you know,
and people ask me all the time, how did you
do it? How do you do it? I don't know
how you do it? Well, honestly, you don't have any toys.
(22:13):
You just have to, you know, put your big girl
pants on and let's go. You just got to keep rolling.
You're just kind of in survival mode. And it's like
five minutes at the time. Sometimes sometimes it's one hour
at the time. Sometimes it's just one day at a time.
You know, we'd have some good days and bad days,
but I really feel like, you know, when you are
(22:34):
in that valley in the storm, that is when you're
being refined, and when you come out on top, you
are so much you're sill refining, you just really appreciate
life so much more in all the small things. So yeah,
it was all of that. It was just such a
crazy time. But I feel like we've come out stronger
(22:54):
because we've as a family, we had to fight hard.
Speaker 2 (22:57):
Yeah, I'm just in awe of everything of your story.
It is it just it feels like way too much
for one family to have to deal with. And the
like you said, the positivity, the openness, the the everything
that you display, you know, after just such a short time,
(23:17):
like you said, of coming out on the other side,
it's just incredible. And so you talk about coming out
on the other side. Was it a year ago today
or around a year ago today that Roil Road got
to ring the bell?
Speaker 1 (23:33):
Yes, Oh my gosh, yes, So on her birthday last
year she got to ring the bell. So it's the
one year anniversary of that, and it was just the.
Speaker 3 (23:42):
Relations I'm clapping in here.
Speaker 1 (23:46):
So now our one out, one year out from that,
and it was just that day felt it was so
emotional because that day seems so far away and the
fact that we got to experience that day and she's
okay now, and it just it felt like freedom. It
felt like, you know, we've been cut from cancer, like
we're like it's done, it's over. We did it, we survived,
(24:09):
like oh my gosh. It just it's so hard to
even put into words, like the excitement, the celebration of
that day. Her school rallied around her aunt, Carson Perry,
but she was such an amazing big sister and you know,
just an all support, you know, of our family and
(24:30):
our kids that fought so hard. It was an incredible day,
incredible way to you know, do ring the belt on
her birthday. It's amazing.
Speaker 2 (24:40):
Yeah, absolutely, And what has what has life been like
in this past year?
Speaker 1 (24:48):
She has been great. There was some lingering anxiety after
for everybody because it's kind of like, okay, now we're
off chemos, so you know you worry like is it
you know, is it going to come back? Like is
she gonna be okay? But thankfully they did check ups
for every month the first year and now this year
(25:10):
because we're one year out from ringing the bell, like
she it's too every two months and then at year
five that's when she's considered cured. So we're still not
I mean, we're still not out of it completely, but
we are just thankful to be where we're at right now. So, yeah,
their eyes on her all the time, and thankfully we've
(25:33):
not had any major stepbacks. And I'll say to COVID
was I know it was terrible for a lot of
people and terrible for us in a lot of ways,
but it's also good because it kept people at home
and kept all the typical colds and germs at bay.
That's so detrimental to a immuno suppressed child because she
(25:55):
would have been in the hospital so much more. With
her case, she was mostly outpatient and was only inpatient
maybe five or six times. Completely.
Speaker 2 (26:08):
Yeah, no, I'm sure during that long journey, any any
little silver linings, you know, you take them and you
grab them.
Speaker 3 (26:15):
Yeah, I've noticed.
Speaker 2 (26:17):
So, like you said, it's been a year of being
you know, since Roro got to Ring the bell, and
you have this incredible Facebook page with a ton of
followers Fight for Roro and you know, twenty two thousand followers,
and in this time you are using that platform to
share other children's stories, because I know as you've shared
(26:41):
with me, and it's just it's it's not something that
I imagine that is far from your mind at any point,
right and you know what other people are going through.
Speaker 3 (26:51):
So I just think it's incredibly.
Speaker 2 (26:55):
I just think it's amazing that you and your family,
after all you've been through, are are paying it forward
and bringing awareness and support to these other children. So
what is that community like among other parents who have
dealt with childhood cancer.
Speaker 1 (27:15):
Yeah, so, well, when our journey started, we immediately thought,
you know, we're just going to be open with this
so we can educate people because literally we had we
didn't know anything about any of this until we got
thrown into it, you know, not by choys. So towards
the end where things were kind of like, I don't know,
(27:36):
we could see the end light of the tunnel. We
started a childhood cancer foundations called row Rose Heroes, and
we wanted so much to pay it forward to help
other families starting the journey, you know, to help guide
them because we've now been through it and we've learned,
and we just want to in some kind of way
(28:01):
help these families that are now coming behind us so
we've become advocates for childhood cancer. We've met with Governor
Roy Cooper and other local leaders to bring more attention
to childhood cancer. Our goal is to be a louder
voice and bring awareness and attention, like I said, to
(28:22):
the lack actually to the lack of funding for childhood
cancer research. And this is so crazy, but only four
percent of our federal research dollars go to childhood cancer research.
That's it. We didn't know any of this until our journey,
and so now we want to be a louder voice.
(28:42):
We want to bring awareness and educate. We just feel
like that's you know, we have a platform, we're able
to get the word out, and like why hold all
that back when we can bring awareness and help other families.
So it's super important to us and and we're just
that's what we're going to continue to do.
Speaker 3 (29:03):
Thank you for sharing all of that.
Speaker 2 (29:04):
Roro's Heroes and the work that you are doing is
just absolutely incredible. As you said, on top of everything else,
right of you both working all the time and having
three children, it's just I'm just in awe of all
that you have done for such an important and worthy
cause and to bring attention to something that does not
(29:27):
have enough attention on it, as you said, So I'm
wondering that, Like, you know, we talked about a year out.
Now what is Roro into? Like is she getting to
enjoy the things that you had hoped for her and
dreamed for her?
Speaker 3 (29:43):
And you know, how are all three of the kids
doing after all of this?
Speaker 1 (29:48):
They are doing so great. Roro is thriving now. And
that girl is so full of sass. Like I feel
like part of how she why she did so well
because she can be feisty and sassy and that's what
helped get her through.
Speaker 3 (30:04):
Good for her.
Speaker 1 (30:05):
But that girl loves music. She loves country music. She
loves to dance, she loves she loves a party. And
she's thriving. She is doing so so great at school.
I'm so proud of her. She's in first grade now,
just turned seven. She is just flying through first grade
doing amazing. Carson Perry is doing so great. She's been
(30:29):
the best big sister and supporter of Row Row and
you know, being a big big sister to Franklin Reeves.
And you know, also like she's had a lot on
her plate obviously, and I know I do feel like
there is some underlying anxiety there with her because of
everything she's heard and seen, but that's something we stay
(30:52):
on top of. And but other than that, she is
doing fantastic. She's in third grade. Third grade is a
big year. She is doing incredible. And then little mister
Franklin Reeves is, Oh my gosh, he is like a
heart throb. He's you know, all the rap and he's
in pre school. He's doing amazing and he is still
(31:14):
you know, a bright light, you know, after our storm.
And yeah, so and Chat is doing great. We're all
we're all doing great. We're still crazy busy, but we're
doing great. We're doing We're so thankful we'll be on
the side now and able to help other families. So yeah,
we're super thankful.
Speaker 2 (31:34):
Well, Meredith, I am super thankful that you shared your
story with us.
Speaker 3 (31:38):
Like I said, I just as a parent, I can't imagine.
Speaker 2 (31:42):
And I am just in awe of you and your
entire family and what you've been through and the attitude
that you still have. And I am I'm so happy
to hear that everyone is thriving and a huge happy birthday.
Speaker 3 (31:56):
To Row Row.
Speaker 2 (31:57):
We're all going to go check out rorose heroes and
and get involved. And I just I can't thank you enough.
And I hope today is just the best day. And
I hope Franklin Reeve's birthday in a couple of days
is amazing too. And it's just what an exciting time
for you and your family. And again, I can't thank
you enough for just sharing this important story.
Speaker 1 (32:18):
So thank you absolutely. Oh and I wanted to say
one thing. So because COVID held us sold for so long,
our kids don't know, but we get to take them
on well on rivers, make a wish trip and we're
going to Disney in a few days.
Speaker 3 (32:33):
Oh my gosh, you're gonna surprise them.
Speaker 1 (32:36):
Yeah, I'm gonna try so hard I fucking hold out.
And yeah, so that's the plan is to surprise them.
So it's got you know, birthdays, spring break, make a wish,
all the things together. So we are super pumped.
Speaker 2 (32:50):
Oh my gosh, that is incredible. I am so happy
for you guys.
Speaker 1 (32:56):
Thank you so much. They're gonna love it. They're just
gonna go crazy. So yeah, it's amazing.
Speaker 3 (33:02):
Oh man, so many good things on the horizon.
Speaker 2 (33:04):
Thank you so much, Meredith for taking the time to
share this story. It's something that I will will never forget.
Speaker 1 (33:12):
So thank you, You're so welcome. Thank you again so
much for having me
So we've become advocates for childhood cancer. We've met with
Governor Roy Cooper and other local leaders to bring more
attention to childhood cancer. Our goal is to be a
louder voice and bring awareness and attention, like I said,
to the lack of funding for childhood cancer research. Only
four percent of our federal research dollars go to childhood
(00:26):
cancer research. That's it. We didn't know any of this
until our journey, and so now we want to be
a louder voice. We want to bring awareness and educate.
Speaker 2 (00:39):
Welcome to Season three of the Inspire Her Podcasts, presented
by Atrium Health. I'm your host, Kristen Balboni, and this
is a podcast series for Panthers fans where we highlight
admirable women from across the Carolinas as they share stories
and lessons from their lives and careers.
Speaker 3 (00:55):
And you know, when.
Speaker 2 (00:57):
We talk about stories that need to be told and
need to be shared, that is exactly what today's episode
is all about. My guest today, Meredith Tucker, is here
to share her family story of resilience and perseverance during
an incredibly tough time.
Speaker 3 (01:14):
So, Meredith, thank you so so much for joining me. Today.
Speaker 1 (01:18):
Oh, thank you so much for having me. I appreciate
the you guys inviting and being willing to hear my story,
So thank you.
Speaker 3 (01:27):
Well. Absolutely.
Speaker 2 (01:28):
You know, when Adriam Hill told me about your story,
I was like, we have to we have to talk
to Meredith and hear more about Roilroad's journey. We're going
to get into all of that, but first, just as
we get started, Meredith, you know, like we said, this
is a podcast really focused on women in the Carolina,
So can you tell me a little bit about you
(01:50):
and your family.
Speaker 1 (01:53):
Yeah, so I've been married four ten years going on
almost eleven. We have three kids. They all have double names.
My oldest is it's a girl, Carson Perry. She's not.
Then we've got her home and Roe, who was now
(02:13):
actually today is her birthday. She's turned seven. And then
we have number three, Franklin Reeves, and he is getting
ready to turn three in a few days.
Speaker 2 (02:26):
So goodness, what a busy time for your family right now.
Birthday parties and all of that.
Speaker 1 (02:33):
Yes, it's just it's crazy. So he came two weeks early,
so I was like, oh my god, birthdays like this
is going to be fun. Welcome to joint birthday parties. Yeah,
just do what you gotta do. And I'm married to
Chad Tucker. He is a local TV journalist here in
(02:55):
the Triad area. I am a license cosmetology just and
business owner. So our family is very busy. They were
just super busy. And then as far as hobbies and
things like that, it's always joke and I'm like, well,
I'm the kids, uber, I'm the chef and like all
(03:19):
of those things. So that's sort of my hobbies.
Speaker 3 (03:22):
So yeah, how would you have time for anything else?
Speaker 1 (03:27):
Yeah, exactly, it's just yeah, doing everything for them, but
I wouldn't have it any other way.
Speaker 2 (03:33):
So absolutely, and happy birthday to Pearl Monroe. As we
said that, she's known affectionately as row Row, so that's
what I'm gonna call her. Even though I've never had
a chance to meet her, I feel like I know her,
so very very happy birthday to her today.
Speaker 3 (03:50):
Yeah, and that's really.
Speaker 2 (03:52):
Why we're here is to is to talk about her journey.
Speaker 3 (03:57):
So I know when Row Row was three.
Speaker 2 (04:00):
As a family, you've got some just absolutely devastating news.
I'm wondering if you can kind of share what I
know just must be you know, painful to talk about.
Speaker 3 (04:10):
A tough time for your family.
Speaker 1 (04:13):
Definitely a hard time. So the start of the story,
it was November of twenty nineteen. She was three and
a half and then my oldest daughter, Carson Perry was
five at the time, just started in kindergarten that fall.
So we first started noticing personality changes. She became really clingy,
(04:37):
She started having some verbal complaints of some different body
aches and pains, and you know, I chalked it up
to growing pains. But then that became around the clock.
Well normally that's something that's kind of you know, at nighttime,
but it was around the clock when and then of
course all these complaints, well it actually I started halloweing night.
(05:02):
She wanted to end going trick or treating, come back
home early. And that was really the start of as like, oh,
that's kind but then all of these then all the
complaints and things started coming, which then led to lots
of doctor visits, which I call ping ponging between all
these doctors X rays, like why is her arm hurting
(05:25):
but there's no fracture, there's no fractures, there's no like
did she fall trying to piece it together? What like
something I just knew some of them just was not right.
As this was about a three week span of trying
to figure out what was going on, our legs began
to ache severely, like I was saying. And also, let
(05:47):
me remind you, I was twenty weeks pregnant.
Speaker 2 (05:49):
I was just thinking about that when you were saying
the age differences and how close their birthdays are. I thought, oh,
my gosh, and you must have been pregnant going through
all this. I can't imagine the stress and the confusion
and how worried you must have been.
Speaker 1 (06:03):
Yeah, so, of course, bringing number three into the family,
I was already like, oh, this is already gonna be
We're gonna be outnumbered, you know. There was just that alone,
and then then all these things started happening, which then
so her legs began to ache, which then on my birthday,
November nineteenth, she started crawling because being was hurting so much.
(06:28):
She wasn't screaming in pain constantly, but it was like
it was just a little more and more verbal complaints,
to the point that she found a way of just
crawling because it felt better to crawl than walk. So
once that happened, I said this is it. We're going back,
We're going to get a CBC panel done, and sure enough,
(06:51):
her white blood cell count was out the roof, which
then led to an appointment at Grinner Children's Hospital, which
we love so much. They've been phenomenal through everything. So
we went to the appointment and just kind of, you know,
re explained everything the scenarios that had led up to
(07:12):
this point. And we we get in there and you know,
doctor Cram was her doctor, and he is incredible, and
he's like, yeah, you know, he's checking her out and thinking,
you know, you know, maybe it's a mono, maybe it's
you know, something else. Worst case scenario it would be leukemia.
(07:33):
But if it is leukemia, there's a cure and you
know she'll be fine. And you know, just being there
at the hospital and I was just like, oh my gosh,
like why are we here? What is it? You know,
it's just my I'm my nerves are really working at
this point and I'm just like shaking all day. And
(07:55):
so they did more blood work to you know, just
really analyze everything, and then there wasn't much left for
us to do at that point. So then we went
I went home. I canceled work for the day. I
was doing hair, a full time licensed cosmetologist, and then
Chad goes back to work because we you know, we
(08:16):
don't really know what we're waiting on or what phone
caller is, you know, what kind of information we're going
to get. But I at this point had a migraine
because I just knew like something was just going on,
and it took until about three thirty for us to
find out news. So Chad went to work. Doctor Cram
(08:38):
called Chad and told him over the phone only because
I was pregnant. He would never normally do that. COVID
had not even started at this point, but he wanted
to be taught the Chad first to figure out how
to tell me because I was pregnant, so he did Chad.
Chad immediately left work. He was supposed to do the
(09:00):
newscast at four o'clock, and he went in told his bosse,
he said, I've got to leave. I've got to go home.
You're gonna have to find someone else to cover. They
had to grab another anchor fill in immediately, and he
came home. He didn't even call me on the way home.
He just sat in silence, driving trying to figure out,
(09:21):
you know, process this information, how he's going to tell me.
And then he comes in our door and I'm sitting
here with Roro. My daughter was I think my mother
had picked her up from school, and Roro is just
kind of crawling around. She's not crying or anything, but
she's just kind of hanging with me, and I'm sitting
(09:42):
here pregnant. Then Chad comes in the door and I'm thinking,
I'm getting ready to see him on the news. And
he comes in and he has his hands in his
pockets and he looks at me, and I knew. I
knew something was wrong because he came in. Normally he
would call me on his way home, but he didn't.
He just walked in and he just said, and I'm
so sorry, but you got leukemia. And just lost it.
(10:07):
We just lost it because I just knew there was
that underlying it. Just everything was starting to add up
and it wasn't making sense. And so that was it.
So we, you know, cried and fell apart, and I
was a mess, a mess, and you know, we so
(10:27):
then we ended up. We took Roro went back to
the hospital. Doctor kran let us ask all the questions
in the world. He was one hundred percent there with us,
like answered, everything helped us through everything. And in that
moment when as soon as I heard the news and
find of process, it just felt absolutely gut wrenching that
(10:52):
like our world had been flipped upside down in a
matter of seconds. I was pregnant, I had a job,
another child, literally like what do you do? What do
we do? Is she going to be okay? Is she
gonna make it? Like? Where do we go next? How
do we do this? Where do we go first? You know,
it's just everything floods your mind and I honestly felt
(11:16):
like a part of me died at that moment. It
just felt like this line in the sand like this,
it just felt like a part of is just fell off,
like literally just died. Even though she was there still
in front of me, everything was there, but it was
just like this. It's so hard to explain it, just
so many emotions wrapped in that moment is it's hard
(11:39):
to even like verbalize. So the next thing you do,
you just you just have to keep moving because you
have to. You can't just stop and quit. So the
next thing we do, we go to the hospital. We
fear out our plan. The next morning she was already
scheduled for to get her port put in and start
(12:00):
chemo immediately, you know, and then also trying to explain
this to our daughter, our five year old, like what
how our life just got flipped upside down? She thinks
there's nothing else going on, you know, everything seems normal
until you know, we start explaining we've got to go
(12:20):
to the hospital. At the hospital, she starts hearing that
all the time, And so explain that Roro has got
some sick bugs in her body, and God made these
incredible doctors, super smart and they are going to help
battle these bad guys and make her better. So, you know,
on a five year old's level, you've got to explain
(12:42):
it so they can understand how our life is getting rechange.
So we go to the hospital and you know, everything
starts rolling and plans start. I felt better once we
got the care plan. Then I kind of had idea
of what was going on. I knew she was going
to be okay. It was going to be a long,
(13:04):
long journey two and a half years. Actually it's even
longer for boys. However, some research is saying it's maybe
not quite as long now, but about two and a
half years for girls. Although leukemia allb cel. What she
had is the the longest care plan but the most
(13:28):
cured childhood cancer, thankfully, whereas some are like super you know,
even more serious cancers, but they are a shorter window
of treatment. It's it's crazy. Let's see. So we got
the blood work and we got so we had everything
(13:48):
rolling the care plan, and then our community was absolutely
unbelievable how they just rallied around us. They came right
around us, supporting us, to a messages, you know, sending meals,
all of those things, and we are so so so
thankful for all of that.
Speaker 2 (14:10):
Absolutely, And Meredith, you know, I'm just as you're telling
this story, I feel like I'm there with you, and
as a parent myself, I just can't like I'm emotional
hearing the story. I can't imagine what that must have
been like. And I just I so appreciate you taking
us through it moment by moment because I see what
(14:31):
you're saying where you're saying like there was a before
time and then there's now and you know all of
the different things that you and your family and Rowro
are navigating. But one thing that stuck out to me
that you said, is that the doctors told you that
if this is the case, and then when it was
the case, if it is leukemia.
Speaker 3 (14:50):
That she'll be Okay, what is it?
Speaker 2 (14:53):
Yeah, and you said, it's a two and a half
year treatment. So what is it like to have that
reassurance to know that no matter you know, as hard
as it gets for her and for all of you,
that I imagine you had, like you said, full faith
in in the treatment and the doctors, and that had
to provide a little bit of of of solace, right
(15:18):
of of just a little bit of relief that at
the end of this tunnel there's going to be an
end in sight.
Speaker 1 (15:26):
Yeah, it was. It was still messy though in the middle.
I mean, the beginning is the new middle is so messy,
and then the end it's like we're almost there, Like
this is where you know, they said we were get
and we're almost there. The mess the middle is just
so messy. As far as all of the meds and
(15:46):
you talk about a three year old on steroids, I
mean that is like there's no other it's a necessary evil,
but it is unbelievable how a child feels like because
they can't you know, really rests how they feel. I know,
they feel like they're crawing out of their skin. They're
like they're awake, they're they're high, they're low, they're hungry,
they're they're digestive system is all out of whack, and
(16:09):
it makes everybody out of whack. And then you know,
there was also funny times too. So we joked because
I was pregnant and I felt like she was acting
like she was pregnant, like she was eating all the
time high and there was a point where her belly
got so distended, her belly button was flat, just like
mine had gotten craving spaghetti and pickles and everything spicy
(16:33):
because the steroids just make your taste buds. I don't know,
it's like you can't taste it good enough, so they
want super spicy type foods.
Speaker 3 (16:46):
But it, oh, please go ahead.
Speaker 1 (16:49):
It just you know, it was just very hard and messy,
and you know, we we had our support, We had
so much support, and it was incredible. But there are
times I will tell you it got only because in
the very beginning, everybody runs to you and surrounds you.
But then as after two years and a few months,
like it gets pretty quiet and like we're still trudging
(17:12):
through the mud and the scary times and the messy part.
So I mean we definitely had you know, people would
send the you know, phone calls and text and things
like that. We were so appreciative and meals and things
like that, and but you know, people get to a
point where they just don't really know what to do
(17:33):
sometimes and they don't know what this and so I
mean the part of that, you know, got really hard
because you need that continuous support. It's just so important
for somebody because it doesn't end eventually hopefully, but in
the middle it's you know, you're not close to the
end yet.
Speaker 2 (17:53):
So no, if anyone can think about just how long
two and a half years are, you know what anyone
listening right now, I was doing two and a half
years ago. To think that that is the time length
that you have to go through this, and that she
has to go through this, it's just it's it's such
a long time. What is it like as a parent,
(18:14):
you know, having to watch your little girl go through
all of this.
Speaker 1 (18:21):
I mean it's devastating because you just know their little
body is fighting so hard, like their immune system gets
wiped out. All vaccinations are wiped out, like she's fighting
for life. Like she lost her hair, which in the
beginning it took a little while for it to start shedding.
She held on to it for a pretty good while
(18:41):
that it was thinning, and then literally by the time
I had my son, it like she was bald. But
there's so much power too, I feel like in seeing
her as a little bald, cute, bald little baby toddler. Still,
I mean, it's just like she is my hero. And
I always say, you know, not a lot of people
(19:03):
have met their heroes, but I gave birth to mine
and it's gonna that she is my hero, so you know.
And then so four months later, after the diagnosis, COVID
comes along. It's creeping around the corner and I'm still
pregnant at this point. So COVID comes, Chad becomes, he
(19:29):
comes home and begins doing the news from home. Now
imagine that like two kids went on steroids. There's camera
cords likes things all strength in my house like craziness.
Then my five year old then because she starts doing
virtual school. At this point, everything's trying to keep germs
(19:52):
and you know, infections and COVID, the unknown everything away
from my sick child, and you know, it just became
so hard. Then people couldn't really visit, It couldn't help
as much physically because of the risk of everything COVID
and with Roro. And honestly, it was so interesting because
(20:17):
we kind of were already living that COVID style, I
guess you'd say, because we had masks and all that
time and protect Roro. Then the world came in and started,
you know, living the way we had already started living
the four months before, because you know, it's all about germs.
You didn't want to get sick because then it was
centered to the hospital. So then where it gets crazy
(20:41):
crazy arth COVID is really starting to amp up. I'm
due with Franklin Reeves my son April eleventh. Well, he
decides to come on April first, and I'm walking around
on March thirty first, telling Chad while he's like on
the news, I think my water broke. I mean my
water broke, and sure enough it did. And uh so
(21:08):
then I end up, you know, going to the hospital
and delivering two weeks early. And Roro is also in
the middle of a second really hard phase of steroids
and another round of all kinds of crazy meds. Our
hair was falling out, and she really at this point
looked like the poster child of like a sick cancer patient.
And then I'm also bringing in a new born at
(21:29):
this point who we always say he was like a
bright light in our storm. And it was a very
dark time because even though it was still hard, he
it was a beautiful distraction for us. It's and from COVID,
and I mean it was very hard. It just really was,
(21:50):
you know, a new horn, not sleeping, a child and
you know, having roid rage and the five year old
trying to keep normalcy for her, and then our marriage
and you know, literally juggling everything. It was just, you know,
and people ask me all the time, how did you
do it? How do you do it? I don't know
how you do it? Well, honestly, you don't have any toys.
(22:13):
You just have to, you know, put your big girl
pants on and let's go. You just got to keep rolling.
You're just kind of in survival mode. And it's like
five minutes at the time. Sometimes sometimes it's one hour
at the time. Sometimes it's just one day at a time.
You know, we'd have some good days and bad days,
but I really feel like, you know, when you are
(22:34):
in that valley in the storm, that is when you're
being refined, and when you come out on top, you
are so much you're sill refining, you just really appreciate
life so much more in all the small things. So yeah,
it was all of that. It was just such a
crazy time. But I feel like we've come out stronger
(22:54):
because we've as a family, we had to fight hard.
Speaker 2 (22:57):
Yeah, I'm just in awe of everything of your story.
It is it just it feels like way too much
for one family to have to deal with. And the
like you said, the positivity, the openness, the the everything
that you display, you know, after just such a short time,
(23:17):
like you said, of coming out on the other side,
it's just incredible. And so you talk about coming out
on the other side. Was it a year ago today
or around a year ago today that Roil Road got
to ring the bell?
Speaker 1 (23:33):
Yes, Oh my gosh, yes, So on her birthday last
year she got to ring the bell. So it's the
one year anniversary of that, and it was just the.
Speaker 3 (23:42):
Relations I'm clapping in here.
Speaker 1 (23:46):
So now our one out, one year out from that,
and it was just that day felt it was so
emotional because that day seems so far away and the
fact that we got to experience that day and she's
okay now, and it just it felt like freedom. It
felt like, you know, we've been cut from cancer, like
we're like it's done, it's over. We did it, we survived,
(24:09):
like oh my gosh. It just it's so hard to
even put into words, like the excitement, the celebration of
that day. Her school rallied around her aunt, Carson Perry,
but she was such an amazing big sister and you know,
just an all support, you know, of our family and
(24:30):
our kids that fought so hard. It was an incredible day,
incredible way to you know, do ring the belt on
her birthday. It's amazing.
Speaker 2 (24:40):
Yeah, absolutely, And what has what has life been like
in this past year?
Speaker 1 (24:48):
She has been great. There was some lingering anxiety after
for everybody because it's kind of like, okay, now we're
off chemos, so you know you worry like is it
you know, is it going to come back? Like is
she gonna be okay? But thankfully they did check ups
for every month the first year and now this year
(25:10):
because we're one year out from ringing the bell, like
she it's too every two months and then at year
five that's when she's considered cured. So we're still not
I mean, we're still not out of it completely, but
we are just thankful to be where we're at right now. So, yeah,
their eyes on her all the time, and thankfully we've
(25:33):
not had any major stepbacks. And I'll say to COVID
was I know it was terrible for a lot of
people and terrible for us in a lot of ways,
but it's also good because it kept people at home
and kept all the typical colds and germs at bay.
That's so detrimental to a immuno suppressed child because she
(25:55):
would have been in the hospital so much more. With
her case, she was mostly outpatient and was only inpatient
maybe five or six times. Completely.
Speaker 2 (26:08):
Yeah, no, I'm sure during that long journey, any any
little silver linings, you know, you take them and you
grab them.
Speaker 3 (26:15):
Yeah, I've noticed.
Speaker 2 (26:17):
So, like you said, it's been a year of being
you know, since Roro got to Ring the bell, and
you have this incredible Facebook page with a ton of
followers Fight for Roro and you know, twenty two thousand followers,
and in this time you are using that platform to
share other children's stories, because I know as you've shared
(26:41):
with me, and it's just it's it's not something that
I imagine that is far from your mind at any point,
right and you know what other people are going through.
Speaker 3 (26:51):
So I just think it's incredibly.
Speaker 2 (26:55):
I just think it's amazing that you and your family,
after all you've been through, are are paying it forward
and bringing awareness and support to these other children. So
what is that community like among other parents who have
dealt with childhood cancer.
Speaker 1 (27:15):
Yeah, so, well, when our journey started, we immediately thought,
you know, we're just going to be open with this
so we can educate people because literally we had we
didn't know anything about any of this until we got
thrown into it, you know, not by choys. So towards
the end where things were kind of like, I don't know,
(27:36):
we could see the end light of the tunnel. We
started a childhood cancer foundations called row Rose Heroes, and
we wanted so much to pay it forward to help
other families starting the journey, you know, to help guide
them because we've now been through it and we've learned,
and we just want to in some kind of way
(28:01):
help these families that are now coming behind us so
we've become advocates for childhood cancer. We've met with Governor
Roy Cooper and other local leaders to bring more attention
to childhood cancer. Our goal is to be a louder
voice and bring awareness and attention, like I said, to
(28:22):
the lack actually to the lack of funding for childhood
cancer research. And this is so crazy, but only four
percent of our federal research dollars go to childhood cancer research.
That's it. We didn't know any of this until our journey,
and so now we want to be a louder voice.
(28:42):
We want to bring awareness and educate. We just feel
like that's you know, we have a platform, we're able
to get the word out, and like why hold all
that back when we can bring awareness and help other families.
So it's super important to us and and we're just
that's what we're going to continue to do.
Speaker 3 (29:03):
Thank you for sharing all of that.
Speaker 2 (29:04):
Roro's Heroes and the work that you are doing is
just absolutely incredible. As you said, on top of everything else,
right of you both working all the time and having
three children, it's just I'm just in awe of all
that you have done for such an important and worthy
cause and to bring attention to something that does not
(29:27):
have enough attention on it, as you said, So I'm
wondering that, Like, you know, we talked about a year out.
Now what is Roro into? Like is she getting to
enjoy the things that you had hoped for her and
dreamed for her?
Speaker 3 (29:43):
And you know, how are all three of the kids
doing after all of this?
Speaker 1 (29:48):
They are doing so great. Roro is thriving now. And
that girl is so full of sass. Like I feel
like part of how she why she did so well
because she can be feisty and sassy and that's what
helped get her through.
Speaker 3 (30:04):
Good for her.
Speaker 1 (30:05):
But that girl loves music. She loves country music. She
loves to dance, she loves she loves a party. And
she's thriving. She is doing so so great at school.
I'm so proud of her. She's in first grade now,
just turned seven. She is just flying through first grade
doing amazing. Carson Perry is doing so great. She's been
(30:29):
the best big sister and supporter of Row Row and
you know, being a big big sister to Franklin Reeves.
And you know, also like she's had a lot on
her plate obviously, and I know I do feel like
there is some underlying anxiety there with her because of
everything she's heard and seen, but that's something we stay
(30:52):
on top of. And but other than that, she is
doing fantastic. She's in third grade. Third grade is a
big year. She is doing incredible. And then little mister
Franklin Reeves is, Oh my gosh, he is like a
heart throb. He's you know, all the rap and he's
in pre school. He's doing amazing and he is still
(31:14):
you know, a bright light, you know, after our storm.
And yeah, so and Chat is doing great. We're all
we're all doing great. We're still crazy busy, but we're
doing great. We're doing We're so thankful we'll be on
the side now and able to help other families. So yeah,
we're super thankful.
Speaker 2 (31:34):
Well, Meredith, I am super thankful that you shared your
story with us.
Speaker 3 (31:38):
Like I said, I just as a parent, I can't imagine.
Speaker 2 (31:42):
And I am just in awe of you and your
entire family and what you've been through and the attitude
that you still have. And I am I'm so happy
to hear that everyone is thriving and a huge happy birthday.
Speaker 3 (31:56):
To Row Row.
Speaker 2 (31:57):
We're all going to go check out rorose heroes and
and get involved. And I just I can't thank you enough.
And I hope today is just the best day. And
I hope Franklin Reeve's birthday in a couple of days
is amazing too. And it's just what an exciting time
for you and your family. And again, I can't thank
you enough for just sharing this important story.
Speaker 1 (32:18):
So thank you absolutely. Oh and I wanted to say
one thing. So because COVID held us sold for so long,
our kids don't know, but we get to take them
on well on rivers, make a wish trip and we're
going to Disney in a few days.
Speaker 3 (32:33):
Oh my gosh, you're gonna surprise them.
Speaker 1 (32:36):
Yeah, I'm gonna try so hard I fucking hold out.
And yeah, so that's the plan is to surprise them.
So it's got you know, birthdays, spring break, make a wish,
all the things together. So we are super pumped.
Speaker 2 (32:50):
Oh my gosh, that is incredible. I am so happy
for you guys.
Speaker 1 (32:56):
Thank you so much. They're gonna love it. They're just
gonna go crazy. So yeah, it's amazing.
Speaker 3 (33:02):
Oh man, so many good things on the horizon.
Speaker 2 (33:04):
Thank you so much, Meredith for taking the time to
share this story. It's something that I will will never forget.
Speaker 1 (33:12):
So thank you, You're so welcome. Thank you again so
much for having me
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