The Heart of Family Life

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Welcome to All Things Family, the podcast that dives into
the heart of family life. From the laughs of the
late nights, the chaos to the cuddles. We're here to
celebrate the joys, face the challenges, and embrace the incredible
journey of having a wonderful, wonderful family. What about family?
What about how amazing family is and also how hard

(00:26):
family is? And today what about some of the funny
things about family because we all go through our trials
and tribulations of being married, of having kids, of watching
the kids get older and grow up, and you know,
and there's nothing easy about that. There really isn't. There's

(00:49):
nothing easy about any of that. But it is also
so worthwhile. But you know, a long the way, there's
so many stories, so many funny things, And I think
most of these things happen really to just about every family,

(01:12):
you know. It just it's just what happens, you know. So,
as I'm sitting here jotting down some notes about what
I would want to talk about for family, and of
course I'm mainly just coming off you know, my own family,
direct family and my extended family. We've got a lot

(01:34):
of years of family, that's for sure. But you know,
for some reason, one of the first things that I
thought about was every family seems to have that person
that knows everything, the know it all, you know what
I'm saying. I mean, it doesn't matter what topic you
were on, this family member knows everything about it. I

(01:57):
mean they're sitting here telling you something right, and you
know it's not right. And you're even going to go
ahead and google this fact. You're going to fact check them, okay,
and you show them the fact, and they're going to
argue with the fact check. Oh, I mean that is

(02:18):
I mean, I know every family has that. I think
we have a couple. And you know that also goes
into you know, when you're precious little five year old
turns into a ten year old and then a twelve
year old and it's still all good, you know, and
then suddenly they're fourteen, fifteen, sixteen, seventeen years old, and

(02:42):
suddenly they know everything. I mean, no matter what, no
matter what it is, what you say is wrong, right.
I mean, that's it's unbelievable because and it's a little
hurtful because you taught them everything they know along the way,
right about life. I'm not talking about math and science well,

(03:03):
some science, but not you know, I'm not talking about
reading and writing that kind of stuff, because you did
teach them too, but you know, you taught them how
to live a life and how to have character and
about things, you know, and then suddenly everything you taught
them goes out the window because now they know more
than you do. So and does that not lead into

(03:27):
like family arguments all the time? I mean the eye rolling,
you know, the head shaking, just thinking to myself, Okay,
I taught you everything you know and you're just totally
totally dismissing me at this point, you know, And I
guess that's just part of growing up, right, where you

(03:50):
get to a certain point you want to be on
your own, you get a little you know, a little
bit rebellious, but also you know, you really just yeah,
when did you get me seventeen eighteen years old? I mean,
I guess it's time to be that way right and
experience life yourself without too many rules and regulations and

(04:16):
all that. You still need basic rules living in a
house and with a family, like you need to have
a curfew, you need to be careful of how much
you know, money you spend mom and dad because you're
still you know, we're still in control of all that.
And I think they get to a certain age where
they really look instead of a parenting figure right where

(04:40):
you're managing every part of their day to day life
and you want to you want to somewhat control it,
and you want to second guess their decisions. And I
hate to use the word micromanage, but you know, but
that's kind of what we do as parents, and that's
what we have to do when they're little, and then
as they you get older, you slowly have to back

(05:04):
off a little bit. And I think that's hard. I mean,
it's it's hard for me. I know, it's it's been
hard for you know, some other people in our family.
It's just it's all part of it. That may be
one of the hardest parts, to be honest with you,
because that that can be one of the biggest parts

(05:24):
of a contention within a family once we hit that
life stage, you know, I mean, oh man, you know,
do I miss the the five year olds and the
three year olds running around like crazy? And I don't
miss the diapers. I was to stay at home dad
for two two and a half years with two toddlers
and an infant trying to put a business together. Man,

(05:46):
that was difficult. But you know the years after that,
you know, five, six, seven years old, those are magical.
Not to take away from any of the later years,
because they're all amazing to watch these kids just grow
up into a begin growing up into something special, you know,

(06:06):
and you know that you've had a hand in that,
a big hand in the direction that they're going, how
they treat people, their personality. You know. Then of course
the friends come in, and the friends have a lot
of influence too, So you know, I think most of
the time that's that's probably good. Sometimes not so much,
but it's just all part of it. So I don't

(06:32):
know how that all started with the know it all,
but that's where it started. You know, you get and different,
And this isn't just to the kids with the kids, right,
this is for the extended family. Right. Suddenly, when you're cooking,
or you're going out on a date night, or suddenly

(06:56):
or you're you know, younger and you're going on to date,
suddenly you get so much free advice from you know,
from your face. So your seventy year old grandmother or
grandmother in law or whatever it may be, is suddenly

(07:17):
giving you know, a seventeen or eighteen year old dating advice.
I mean, come on, I mean I know that it's
it's precious and it's special, but I think it's a
little different. I think it's a little different. It's kind
of like with that generation giving fashion advice to, you know,

(07:41):
to teenagers. They're like, my mother in law can she's
she's got great fashion and she can absolutely advise, you know,
my my teenage girls, and you know how give them
some fashion advice without missing a be I and I
would respect that, and so with the girls. But for
the most part, it's cluelessness, right who I mean, you know,

(08:07):
we're not going to wear a hoop skirt and big
black laced up boots or whatever. You know, we're not
going on a carriage ride. But to me, that's always
been kind of funny because you know, my grandparents used
to they buy me clothes for Christmas. Oh it was
cringe worthy, you know. I mean this country Western shirt

(08:31):
with pearl snap buttons and a collar that was way
too big and this textured shoulder pattern. Oh man, it
was can you just imagine that? And you got to
be thankful for that, Oh, thank you so much, Le,
I'm never wearing this thing, you know. And that also
goes with with just the whole fashion thing with you

(08:53):
know that what do your kids wear these days? Sometimes?
I mean, you know, the boys are pretty easy, but
the girls fashion changes so much. I mean like every
five years. You know, one year it's like these really
cool white western skirts and cowboy boots and you know,

(09:13):
nice tops, a little bit conservative, and the next thing,
you know, it's these shorts where you know, they're smiling
at you when they're coming at you, and they're smiling
at you when they're leaving, you know. And I swore
that my girls would never wear those shorts like that,
but guess what, Yeah, sometimes they wear those shorts. Joys

(09:35):
of being a dad, I guess. But you know, and
then the next year it could be sweatpants and pajamas
all the time. You know, it look like slippers. You
just never really know what's going to happen there. And
you can't tell your kids to hey, you can't dress

(09:57):
that way at all, because then they go to school
they're made fun of, you know what I mean. I
mean that they are literally just made fun of. So
you got to be careful with that as far as
as family things go in parenting. Oh so, you know,

(10:19):
we all have little things that we're all hung up on,
like little things that we say, you know, don't touch
the thermostat. Who really cares that much? I mean, do

(10:40):
we all go around wanting to touch the thermostat? You know,
I don't. I don't pay much attention to it. But
if I'm hot, and I'll turn it down a little bit.
And if i'm cold, you know, you go to your
grandparents house, of course, and it's you know, it's eighty five.
They got to sit on eighty five. If I'm going
to stay there and visit for a while, I'm gonna
turn that down and I'm going to get them a blanket.

(11:02):
I mean, don't I think that's fair? Because I can't
stay in a house that is eighty five degrees. It
just doesn't work. It doesn't work. And you know what's
with the good china? Okay, we have cabinets full of

(11:23):
plates and bowls, But every now and then you'll hear, oh,
you can't eat off the good china? Really? Why? I mean,
tell me why? It's almost all dishwashers safe these days,
the chances of breaking it are not that big. Why
can't you eat off what's in the cabinet. I don't

(11:44):
completely agree with that, So now we've kind of taken
that rule off. So everything that's in the cabinet is
fair game. I prefer the kids not to drink out
of the nice wineglasses, like water and you know stuff
like that, out of the wine glasses, just because they're
so fragile, right, Not because they it's off limits, but
you know, you accidentally hit those, they're so thin. You

(12:06):
accidentally hit them somewhere, it turns over, it's just gonna
break everywhere. So that that's really the only only rule
I got got there. Oh man, anybody have weird traditions?
You know, I'm trying to think of the ones that
we have. We used to hide a pickle in the
Christmas tree, all right, really just didn't have a whole

(12:33):
bunch of weird traditions. I guarantee you. As soon as
I signed off of this, I'm gonna start thinking about
the uh, all the weird traditions that our family has.
I think the biggest thing for me when I think about,
you know, funny things with the family is it really

(12:54):
is just the things that happened when you all get
together and they're they're not scripted, things are totally impromptu,
and and someone says something completely inappropriate. My mother was
famous for saying the most inappropriate things because she had
no filter. As soon as something came to her mind,
she said it. And she said some things, and my

(13:15):
father would just who was who was a judge and
very conservative and you know, buttoned up and all that
to look on his face. Sometimes I'd be like, oh
my gosh, but I thought it was hilarious. I laughed.
I always thought she was just her sense of humor
and her spirit was absolutely it was absolutely amazing. And

(13:36):
there's no way that anybody could crush a spirit like that,
but she was. She was so funny, and it just
led to so many great memories of you know, my
sister and I get together, when you start laughing about
all the crazy things that Mom did. I called her
Madre and she was. She was a mess man, but
she was so funny, so funny, So what else I mean?

(14:03):
And then just like the chaos, you know, when you
all get together, the chaos of family, it's everybody go
in a different direction, and sometimes it's managed chaos. Sometimes
it is not just all the memories. And I know
I'm like kind of like saying like a lot, but

(14:26):
I got so much going through my head right now
that it's hard to come out with just the few
things I want to talk about. To me, it's still
going back to the kids, you know, when they were little.
The thing my son would not go. He hated school
so bad because he was so shy, and he would
we would take him to the carpool line. He wouldn't
get out of the car. We would get out of

(14:47):
the car. We'd get him out of the car. He
would hold onto my leg or my wife's leg, bawling
as loud as he could, I mean, and he would
not let go. The principal would come out, the teachers
would come out. I mean, was strong. Even as a
four and five six year old. He wasn't gonna let go.
He would have to go sit with a guy that's
counselor flake an I or calm himself down. Poor thing.

(15:11):
You know. Same thing with you know, going to party.
He wanted to go to parties so bad, and he'd
get there and he just had a little anxiety and he,
you know, he would stand there and watch a lot,
you know, and then slowly ease into it. One of
the funny things. And he understand. This kid now is
eighteen years old and he's six six, and he's ginormous,

(15:31):
works out a lot. Just he's a good we're really
good young man, and all that anxiety he's lost, which
is good. But we would take him to the jump castles,
right and also my daughter was about a year and
a half younger. We would take them to the jump
castle and if there was one other person in there,

(15:53):
he's not getting in. He's not going to get in.
I ended up being the bouncer of the jump castle,
so while he was jumping, I wouldn't let anybody else in.
I'm sure. I'm sure the parents hated going there when
you know, when my family was there, because that that
big ball headed bouncer right there was not gonna let
your kid in until his kid's done. Oh well, just

(16:14):
so many cool things. My daughter would sit, she won't
allowed to go across the street. She was probably four maybe,
and there were these two girls a little bit older
that lived across the street and they'd be outside playing
and they were just old enough that it wasn't always
a good playful mix. You know, she wanted to go

(16:36):
across here so bad that she would sit out there
at the curb with this frown on her face watching
those two girls play, wanting to go there so bad.
She would sit there for hours. We would finally have
to just go pick her up and physically put her
in the house and say, let's well, go find something
else to do. I mean, there's so many stories like that.

(16:59):
One time she uh, it's when I was a stay
at home dad. She she hit. She hid behind the
Christmas tree, of course, so we had on Christmas jomming.
So they were green and red like the Christmas tree,
and it was pushed up against the stairwell kind of,
and you know, we were kind of playing a little
hide and seek sorta. And then that that ended, and

(17:20):
then I really I couldn't find her. I'm like where,
and I'm asking my son, I said, where's your sister.
He's like, I don't know, and where's right there at
the Christmas tree the whole time, and she was behind
it and she wouldn't come out. It's pouring down rain.
We lived next to a tidal creek with the current rump,
I mean rolls faster than a river. Uh, and there's

(17:42):
no you know, there's no fence along that river or
that or that that creek. It was big creek looks
like a river. And I'm running in the mud in
my socks. I'm yelling her name. I'm going out to
the street. I'm looking. I'm calling my wife. I'm like,
I cannot find our daughter. If I don't find her
in the next five minutes, I'm calling nine to one one.

(18:04):
I just want you to know I have no idea
where she is. And this is after I've searched the
whole house. Well, then I came in and I'm still
looking around and a yell her name one one last
time before I hit the one on the nine to
one one, and she just comes laughing out from behind
a Christmas tree. I've never been so mad and so

(18:25):
happy in my life. But you know, things like that
are what make good good family stories. A lot of
funny stuff happens when it's not intended to be funny.
So I guess that's what I'm saying is family can
be tough, There's no doubt about that, but you better
enjoy it. Enjoy your family, each personality into each stage.

(18:55):
Because you think that oh, I'm in the stage right now.
When I get to the next stage is going to
be easier. No, it's not. But you know, they leave
you prepared for the next stage. I don't know how
that works, but somehow you always get it done. So
I'm gonna leave it there because the Man is having

(19:17):
an emotional moment. So anyway, thank you guys for listening.
I'm the Man. This is my podcast, and I am out,
and I hope you all have a great day and
God bless you all.