I Wished I Was Her: Owning Contradictions, Realigning with Your True Self

For the women who feel torn between who they are and who they think they should be—this one’s for you. 

Ever catch yourself envying a version of someone else’s life—only to realise you’ve been shrinking your own?

In this week’s episode of Reflections & Realizations, I dive into that raw and very real tension of wanting to be “her”—that version of yourself you think would finally be enough. It’s about facing the contradictions within you, owning them, and using them as your power.

This episode isn’t about self-improvement. It’s about self-return.

It’s for the parts of you that feel messy, unfinished, or too much. And it’s about realigning with who you actually are—beneath the expectations, pressure, and performance.

🛠️ This Week’s Realignment Tool

✨ From Shrinking to Secure
A two-step journaling exercise to help you reclaim your identity with softness and strength.

➤ Step 1: Name the “And”
Write three things about yourself that feel like contradictions—but are actually your power.
Say them out loud. For example:

• “I love kids but I don’t want kids.”
• “I’m unmarried and I still feel complete.”
• “I’m an introvert and I have a podcast.”

Your contradictions aren’t flaws—they’re freedom.

➤ Step 2: Realign With Your True Self
Ask yourself:

• “Who am I when I’m not performing?”
• “Who am I when I stand before God, not the world?”

That’s your anchor. Act from that place.
 Wear the thing. Say the truth. Launch the project.
 Not for validation. Not for applause.
 But because you’re already enough—and belonging starts with being fully yourself somewhere.

I’d love to hear your “And” truths. Share them with me—because when you speak them, you stop shrinking.

With love,
 Alveena
Reflections & Realizations

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Thank you for listening. If something in an episode touched you, made you think, or just hit different… I’d love to hear it. Alveena