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August 26, 2025 45 mins

Is Your Drive for Excellence a Wtrength—or a Mask?

 In this powerful conversation, Blisspot Founder & CEO Deborah Tyson sits down with psychologist, author, and SelfWork podcast host Dr. Margaret Rutherford to explore Perfectly Hidden Depression—when high-achieving, “together” lives quietly camouflage emotional pain. Dr. Margaret unpacks the crucial difference between constructive and destructive perfectionism, why rates of perfectionism track with suicidal ideation, and how shifting from “vulnerability” to emotional transparency gives us back a sense of choice and safety.

Drawing on decades of clinical practice, personal stories, and her bestselling book, Dr. Margaret shares practical ways to widen your emotional range, release shame that isn’t yours to carry, and build self-acceptance: recognizing that neither your strengths nor your struggles fully define you.

In this episode, you’ll learn:

  • The 2 types of perfectionism—and how to tell which one is driving you
  • How “perfect” identities form and why they often feel so lonely
  • The link between rising perfectionism and suicidal thinking (and what to watch for)
  • Why “emotional transparency” can be safer and more empowering than “vulnerability”
  • The 10 traits of Perfectly Hidden Depression (and how to start unmasking them)
  • A practical definition of self-acceptance you can use today

Resources & links:

  • SelfWork Podcast: https://learn.blisspot.com/courses/selfwork-podcasts
  • Book: Perfectly Hidden Depression: How to Break Free from Perfectionism That Masks Your Depression
  • Website: drmargaretrutherford.com
  • Email: askdrmargaret@drmargaretrutherford.com

If you’re struggling, please reach out to a qualified mental health professional in your area. You don’t have to do this alone.

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