1 Peter 3:7 Godly Husbands, Dwelling with Understanding

First, Broad Credit to Pastor Kevin Deyoung. I have taught on these verses previously and I want to credit everything good to him and acknowledge. Everyone ought to read his articles and books on this topic. Specifically chapter 5 of Men and Women in the Church: A Short, Biblical, Practical Introduction which is an exposition of Ephesians 5.

Second, Since it is a singular verse that gives two really broad principles dwell with understanding, show honor, given three principles about your wife. We will pull in broader principles from numerous other bible passage on husbands.

Third, if you are not married. We can say, in different areas of your life you have leadership, care, and act as a Brother and Father spiritually. So through the years I have had several godly men and elders who were not husbands and fathers to individual families, but they were husbands and fathers to their Church, the broader church, their place of work, and their community. The Apostle Paul himself seems to fit this category. While Peter appears to have a wife and family. This may be why Peter’s instructions are so brief and practical and Paul reflects to the theological root a little more than Peter.

Lastly, Sisters, please see the relevance of thinking about slightly less than 50% of the population. And being able to reason wisely on what a godly man or husband Is.

Read: 1 Peter 3:7 Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered. (ESV)

Four Questions today.

#1 Why Just One Verse?

#2 What is dwelling with Understanding?

#3 How is Honor shown?

#4 How to love like Jesus loves the Church?

Why Just one verse? Peter spends 6 verses on the occasion when only the wife is a believer because she was socially vulnerable. Now, because the husband’s position was less socially vulnerable if only he was a believer. Peter is Briefer but this one verse is still necessary because Peter wants the Leader, the head of the home to use his authority wisely and to be a blessing as a believer. So that the watching world could see how the Christian husband leads his home with Faith & Love both when his wife believes and when she does not believe.

Kevin DeYoung notes that in Ephesians 5 The Commands are at the specific points of fallenness. That is also our context of 1 Peter 3.

So just as Peter sees how a good thing internal and external beauty can become twisted. And instead must be cultivated with godliness.

Now Peter shows how a good thing – strength and leadership can become a bad thing, unthoughtful, inattentive, lack of leadership, and instead smug spiritual superiority and uncaring of your wife’s spiritual growth and good.

So to correct our fallen distortions of Masculinity Peter, Paul, and Jesus command Husbands to several duties.

Husbands are to live with their wives with love & honor. They are to lead, understand, provide, and protect their wives.

This positive vision, if embraced, will be the good blessing that expels the curse of the fall.

Two Principles of how this leadership and headship is entered into before we unpack this one verse.

First, Remember, Marriage is VOLUNTARY, it is a good creational ordinance, it can even be said to be the statistical norm and vision for the majority of people and good. But at the end of the day – As Jesus says, there is no marriage in heaven (Matt. 22:23–33; parallels in Mark 12:25). And Further, some are for a season, or for life called to singleness.

For those who have voluntarily taken marriage vows to: to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or for worse, for rich or for poor, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death us do part, according to God’s holy ordinance; and thereto I plight thee my faithful promise...And the wife takes the same vow but with the addition to obey…reflecting that The husband is the head of the wife. “as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands” (Eph. 5:24)

Because of these two realities—the headship of the husband in the created order and the analogy of Christ and the church—the wife should freely submit to her husband.

I say that to point out that

The man is never told to submit the wife unto himself. Instead, the woman is told to submit herself unto her husband. It is a submission freely given, never forcibly taken.

1) It is freely entered