July 3, 2025 • 14 mins
In this episode of the Confidence in God podcast, host Julie McGhghy explores the difference between striving for perfection and aiming for excellence in our efforts to glorify God. Through the biblical stories of Rebekah and Martha, she illustrates how serving with excellence enhances our relationships and pleases God, while striving for perfection can lead to guilt, shame, and strained relationships. Julie also provides practical steps based on 2 Peter 1:5-7 and other scriptures to help listeners develop a mindset of excellence. She concludes by urging listeners to let go of perfectionism and embrace a journey toward Christian maturity. For those struggling with feelings of guilt and shame, she recommends the episode 'Understanding God's Expectations, Letting Go of Guilt and Shame.'
00:00 Introduction to Confidence in God
00:23 The Struggle Between Perfection and Excellence
02:45 Rebekah's Story: Serving with Excellence
04:09 Martha's Story: Striving for Perfection
05:34 Comparing Rebekah and Martha
08:59 Biblical Insights on Excellence and Perfection
11:22 Signs of Perfectionism and Its Impact
12:38 Conclusion and Encouragement
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
Hello and welcome to theConfidence in God podcast.
(00:03):
I am your host, Julie McGhghy,and our goal today is to help
you walk with confidence in God.
Today, I'm happy to be able toshare with you the stories of
two women who illustrate to usthe difference between doing
things perfectly and doing themwith excellence.
As Christians, many of us striveto do all things to the glory of
(00:27):
God as the apostle Paul taughtin his letters to the churches,
yet we often find that westruggle to meet our own
expectations of what that lookslike.
When we do something thatdoesn't appear or turn out as
wonderfully as we would want itto in order to glorify God, we
(00:47):
often get frustrated and wemight even talk down to
ourselves, treating ourselves asif we had failed, even worse as
if we were failures.
Possibly when we are workingwith a team of people, we may
get frustrated with othermembers of the team if they
aren't putting the same effortinto completing the task in the
(01:11):
way that we view as glorifyingGod.
Even though we may not sayanything to the other person,
our attitude tends to seep outof us, and the person or the
whole team may becomedisgruntled.
So I hope that today I can helpyou recognize the difference
between glorifying God byreaching toward excellence
(01:34):
versus striving for perfection.
Before jumping into these twostories of these women, I wanna
refer you to another confidencein God podcast episode you might
find helpful.
When I have talked or writtenabout this topic in the past,
people often bring up feelingsof guilt and shame.
(01:56):
If you are a person whostruggles with such feelings,
you may find the episode titledUnderstanding God's
Expectations, Letting Go ofGuilt and Shame to be helpful.
Check out the link to it in theshow notes if you would like to
listen to it.
Alternatively, you can find iton your favorite platform where
(02:17):
you listen to podcasts.
The two women I'm going to talkabout today are Rebekah and
Martha.
They didn't know each other.
They didn't even live near eachother or even at the same time.
And they both tried to do theirbest in everything they did, but
they took different approachesto do it.
(02:38):
Two different approaches we canlearn from in order to be
confident that we are glorifyingGod.
In Genesis 24, we read aboutRebekah.
She went to the well to drawwater, which was her usual task.
When she arrived, a man wasthere.
He asked her for a drink ofwater because Rebekah was
(03:01):
committed to doing her best atwhatever she did, or what we
would say is that she wascommitted to doing everything
for the glory of God, shehastened to draw water for him.
She didn't do it do so leisurelyor begrudgingly.
She quickly provided the water.
(03:23):
Rebekah didn't stop when the manwas satisfied.
Instead, Rebekah offered to domore.
She didn't ask if the man neededher to do it or if the man would
allow her to do it.
She didn't even say she would goto get help to do it.
She merely said she would domore.
She would water the man'scamels, also drawing water until
(03:47):
the camels were done drinking.
Even when doing more than theman asked her to do, she still
hastened.
She didn't slow her effortsbecause she was merely tending
to the animals.
She hastened to fill the trough,going back and forth, to and
from the well until the camelswere done drinking.
(04:09):
Then in Luke 10 we read aboutMartha.
Now she didn't have to be askedto do anything.
When Jesus came to visit, shealready had in her mind what
needed to be done and knew howto do it perfectly.
Like Rebekah, Martha quickly sether hand to the task.
She began preparing the perfectmeal to serve her guest, but she
(04:33):
didn't do it with quite the sameattitude as Rebekah.
There was much to do.
Martha glanced around to see whowas going to help her get it
done.
When she found her sistersitting at the feet of Jesus
with no intention of helpingMartha, she marched straight to
(04:54):
Jesus and begrudgingly askedhim, and I paraphrase, Lord,
don't you care that my sisterhas left me to serve alone?
Martha did not discreetly andrespectfully approach her sister
directly to ask for herassistance.
Instead, Martha went straight toJesus and accused him of not
(05:20):
caring about her situation.
She then went a step further anddemanded, demanded that he
instruct her sister to help her.
What was the difference betweenRebekah's and Martha's
approaches?
Rebekah sought to serve withexcellence?
(05:42):
Martha sought to serveperfectly.
The approach we choose to servewith makes all the difference in
the world.
Although the quality of servicemay appear the same, the impact
on our relationships and theconsequences of our service may
be very different.
(06:02):
Excellence is the quality ofbeing very good at something.
Perfectionism on the other hand,is the refusal to accept any
standard short of perfection.
Since we are called to do allthings to the glory of God,
according to one Corinthians 10: 31, it is important to (06:17):
undefined
understand which of theseapproaches glorifies God, and we
can tell that by the results ofour actions.
Rebekah served with excellence.
Her excellent service resultedin high quality service and
building a relationship.
The man and the camels werequickly satisfied.
(06:40):
Their needs were met, and shebuilt a relationship with the
man.
Because of her demeanor andresponse, he felt comfortable
that she was the one to be thewife of his master's son.
She became the wife of Isaac,one of the patriarchs of Israel,
and gave birth to another one,Jacob, who God named Israel.
(07:05):
Rebekah's excellent service,glorified God.
Martha, on the other hand,strived to serve perfectly.
There is no doubt that theservice she provided was of high
quality.
She put the perfect meal on thetable for her esteemed guest.
She likely received manygracious compliments.
(07:29):
But in the end, she damaged herrelationship with her sister and
with Jesus.
In fact, Jesus had to correcther publicly for her incorrect
approach.
Her perfect performance broughtattention onto herself, but did
not glorify God.
(07:51):
There is a world of differencebetween doing something with
excellence and striving to do itperfectly.
As I already mentioned, whenI've written or spoken about
this topic, I have received manycomments from people who strive
for perfection.
It seems many Christiansstruggle with feelings of
(08:11):
disappointing God when they'renot able to achieve perfection,
yet perfection is not Hisstandard and perfection does not
glorify Him.
Those of us who struggle withperfection need to rethink our
approach.
In order to be confident that weare glorifying God in everything
we do, we need to stop pursuingperfection and simply serve with
(08:36):
excellence, striving to see theneeds and tend to them without
having to be asked.
Go the extra mile.
And let God be glorified, notourselves.
Now stay with me just a couplemore minutes as I share how we
tell the difference betweenserving with excellence and
(08:57):
striving for perfection.
In 2 Peter 1:5-7, the apostlePeter tells us how to develop
excellence.
First, we act by faith anddiligently seek virtue,
developing knowledge,self-control, patience,
(09:18):
godliness, brotherly affection,and Christian love.
These characteristics wereevident in Rebekah when she
hastened to fetch water for thisman and continued doing so for
the camels.
These characteristics build uponeach other as we continue
diligently leading to theknowledge, then to patience,
(09:42):
then to godliness, et cetera.
Excellence also includeshonesty, according to 1 Peter
2:12.
When we act in faith anddiligently pursue the above
characteristics of excellenceand speak honestly with all
people, our good works willglorify God.
(10:03):
As Rebekah did, when we pursueexcellence, we speak honestly
and kindly to others, and wetake responsibility for our
actions.
By our actions, attitude andbehavior, God is glorified.
Perfection, on the other hand,is striving to achieve an
(10:24):
unachievable standard.
It is striving to be flawless,which is not consistent with the
biblical concept of perfection.
When the Bible speaks ofperfection in us, it is
generally referring to maturity.
In Ephesians 4:12, the ApostlePaul describes the gifts the
Lord gave for perfecting of thesaints.
(10:47):
This perfecting is the maturingof the saints, fully equipping
them to do the work of thechurch.
The Amplified Version of Matthew5:48 helps us understand that
when Jesus called us to beperfect, He was calling us to
grow into"complete maturity ofgodliness in mind and character,
(11:10):
having reached the proper heightof virtue and integrity." This
biblical perfection is more akinto excellence, not flawlessness.
We can tell we are striving forperfection instead of excellence
when we do not tolerate our ownmistakes, when we berate
(11:32):
ourselves and constantly pick atour own work because it is never
quite good enough.
Also, when we see ourrelationships with other people
suffer, especially those who areclose to us or who must work
with us.
This happens because we imposeour own high unachievable
(11:55):
standards on everyone around us,and they cannot measure up,
causing both you and themfrustration.
Another sign of perfectionism inour lives is that frequent
feeling of disappointing God.
A dear friend of mine oncepointed out to me that we often
find our prayer time beingineffectual because we replace
(12:18):
fervency with apology.
This damages our relationshipwith God because we're not
growing in him praying forothers and for his will to be
done on earth as it is inheaven.
Instead, we are constantly inrepentance, not growth.
(12:38):
Let me quickly summarize thislesson.
It is really good to have it inour hearts to do all things to
the glory of God, but sometimeswe get confused about what that
looks like.
Instead of doing things withexcellence to glorify God, we
may find ourselves striving forperfection.
(13:00):
Excellence glorifies God, buildsrelationships with other people,
and helps us mature in our walkwith God.
Striving for perfection drawsattention to ourselves, causes
feelings of guilt and shame,harms our relationships with
other people, and does notcontribute to our Christian
(13:23):
maturity.
I encourage you today to observeyour own actions, attitudes, and
behavior in order to determineif you are striving for
excellence or perfection.
If the latter turn your facetoward God and diligently pursue
the characteristics ofexcellence, which will glorify
(13:44):
him and lead you into Christianmaturity.
We can be confident we areglorifying God when we pursue
excellence.
If you struggle with feelings ofguilt and shame and haven't
already listened toUnderstanding God's
Expectations, Letting Go ofGuilt and Shame, click on the
(14:05):
link in the show notes to accessit and listen to the short 12
minute episode.
That's it for today.
Please take a second tosubscribe to our show, so you'll
be notified when future episodescome out.
Also, it would mean the world tous if you would rate or review
our show.
That way more people can findout about it.
(14:29):
Until next time, let's beconfident in this, that he who
began a good work in you will befaithful to complete it.
Hello and welcome to theConfidence in God podcast.
(00:03):
I am your host, Julie McGhghy,and our goal today is to help
you walk with confidence in God.
Today, I'm happy to be able toshare with you the stories of
two women who illustrate to usthe difference between doing
things perfectly and doing themwith excellence.
As Christians, many of us striveto do all things to the glory of
(00:27):
God as the apostle Paul taughtin his letters to the churches,
yet we often find that westruggle to meet our own
expectations of what that lookslike.
When we do something thatdoesn't appear or turn out as
wonderfully as we would want itto in order to glorify God, we
(00:47):
often get frustrated and wemight even talk down to
ourselves, treating ourselves asif we had failed, even worse as
if we were failures.
Possibly when we are workingwith a team of people, we may
get frustrated with othermembers of the team if they
aren't putting the same effortinto completing the task in the
(01:11):
way that we view as glorifyingGod.
Even though we may not sayanything to the other person,
our attitude tends to seep outof us, and the person or the
whole team may becomedisgruntled.
So I hope that today I can helpyou recognize the difference
between glorifying God byreaching toward excellence
(01:34):
versus striving for perfection.
Before jumping into these twostories of these women, I wanna
refer you to another confidencein God podcast episode you might
find helpful.
When I have talked or writtenabout this topic in the past,
people often bring up feelingsof guilt and shame.
(01:56):
If you are a person whostruggles with such feelings,
you may find the episode titledUnderstanding God's
Expectations, Letting Go ofGuilt and Shame to be helpful.
Check out the link to it in theshow notes if you would like to
listen to it.
Alternatively, you can find iton your favorite platform where
(02:17):
you listen to podcasts.
The two women I'm going to talkabout today are Rebekah and
Martha.
They didn't know each other.
They didn't even live near eachother or even at the same time.
And they both tried to do theirbest in everything they did, but
they took different approachesto do it.
(02:38):
Two different approaches we canlearn from in order to be
confident that we are glorifyingGod.
In Genesis 24, we read aboutRebekah.
She went to the well to drawwater, which was her usual task.
When she arrived, a man wasthere.
He asked her for a drink ofwater because Rebekah was
(03:01):
committed to doing her best atwhatever she did, or what we
would say is that she wascommitted to doing everything
for the glory of God, shehastened to draw water for him.
She didn't do it do so leisurelyor begrudgingly.
She quickly provided the water.
(03:23):
Rebekah didn't stop when the manwas satisfied.
Instead, Rebekah offered to domore.
She didn't ask if the man neededher to do it or if the man would
allow her to do it.
She didn't even say she would goto get help to do it.
She merely said she would domore.
She would water the man'scamels, also drawing water until
(03:47):
the camels were done drinking.
Even when doing more than theman asked her to do, she still
hastened.
She didn't slow her effortsbecause she was merely tending
to the animals.
She hastened to fill the trough,going back and forth, to and
from the well until the camelswere done drinking.
(04:09):
Then in Luke 10 we read aboutMartha.
Now she didn't have to be askedto do anything.
When Jesus came to visit, shealready had in her mind what
needed to be done and knew howto do it perfectly.
Like Rebekah, Martha quickly sether hand to the task.
She began preparing the perfectmeal to serve her guest, but she
(04:33):
didn't do it with quite the sameattitude as Rebekah.
There was much to do.
Martha glanced around to see whowas going to help her get it
done.
When she found her sistersitting at the feet of Jesus
with no intention of helpingMartha, she marched straight to
(04:54):
Jesus and begrudgingly askedhim, and I paraphrase, Lord,
don't you care that my sisterhas left me to serve alone?
Martha did not discreetly andrespectfully approach her sister
directly to ask for herassistance.
Instead, Martha went straight toJesus and accused him of not
(05:20):
caring about her situation.
She then went a step further anddemanded, demanded that he
instruct her sister to help her.
What was the difference betweenRebekah's and Martha's
approaches?
Rebekah sought to serve withexcellence?
(05:42):
Martha sought to serveperfectly.
The approach we choose to servewith makes all the difference in
the world.
Although the quality of servicemay appear the same, the impact
on our relationships and theconsequences of our service may
be very different.
(06:02):
Excellence is the quality ofbeing very good at something.
Perfectionism on the other hand,is the refusal to accept any
standard short of perfection.
Since we are called to do allthings to the glory of God,
according to one Corinthians 10: 31, it is important to (06:17):
undefined
understand which of theseapproaches glorifies God, and we
can tell that by the results ofour actions.
Rebekah served with excellence.
Her excellent service resultedin high quality service and
building a relationship.
The man and the camels werequickly satisfied.
(06:40):
Their needs were met, and shebuilt a relationship with the
man.
Because of her demeanor andresponse, he felt comfortable
that she was the one to be thewife of his master's son.
She became the wife of Isaac,one of the patriarchs of Israel,
and gave birth to another one,Jacob, who God named Israel.
(07:05):
Rebekah's excellent service,glorified God.
Martha, on the other hand,strived to serve perfectly.
There is no doubt that theservice she provided was of high
quality.
She put the perfect meal on thetable for her esteemed guest.
She likely received manygracious compliments.
(07:29):
But in the end, she damaged herrelationship with her sister and
with Jesus.
In fact, Jesus had to correcther publicly for her incorrect
approach.
Her perfect performance broughtattention onto herself, but did
not glorify God.
(07:51):
There is a world of differencebetween doing something with
excellence and striving to do itperfectly.
As I already mentioned, whenI've written or spoken about
this topic, I have received manycomments from people who strive
for perfection.
It seems many Christiansstruggle with feelings of
(08:11):
disappointing God when they'renot able to achieve perfection,
yet perfection is not Hisstandard and perfection does not
glorify Him.
Those of us who struggle withperfection need to rethink our
approach.
In order to be confident that weare glorifying God in everything
we do, we need to stop pursuingperfection and simply serve with
(08:36):
excellence, striving to see theneeds and tend to them without
having to be asked.
Go the extra mile.
And let God be glorified, notourselves.
Now stay with me just a couplemore minutes as I share how we
tell the difference betweenserving with excellence and
(08:57):
striving for perfection.
In 2 Peter 1:5-7, the apostlePeter tells us how to develop
excellence.
First, we act by faith anddiligently seek virtue,
developing knowledge,self-control, patience,
(09:18):
godliness, brotherly affection,and Christian love.
These characteristics wereevident in Rebekah when she
hastened to fetch water for thisman and continued doing so for
the camels.
These characteristics build uponeach other as we continue
diligently leading to theknowledge, then to patience,
(09:42):
then to godliness, et cetera.
Excellence also includeshonesty, according to 1 Peter
2:12.
When we act in faith anddiligently pursue the above
characteristics of excellenceand speak honestly with all
people, our good works willglorify God.
(10:03):
As Rebekah did, when we pursueexcellence, we speak honestly
and kindly to others, and wetake responsibility for our
actions.
By our actions, attitude andbehavior, God is glorified.
Perfection, on the other hand,is striving to achieve an
(10:24):
unachievable standard.
It is striving to be flawless,which is not consistent with the
biblical concept of perfection.
When the Bible speaks ofperfection in us, it is
generally referring to maturity.
In Ephesians 4:12, the ApostlePaul describes the gifts the
Lord gave for perfecting of thesaints.
(10:47):
This perfecting is the maturingof the saints, fully equipping
them to do the work of thechurch.
The Amplified Version of Matthew5:48 helps us understand that
when Jesus called us to beperfect, He was calling us to
grow into"complete maturity ofgodliness in mind and character,
(11:10):
having reached the proper heightof virtue and integrity." This
biblical perfection is more akinto excellence, not flawlessness.
We can tell we are striving forperfection instead of excellence
when we do not tolerate our ownmistakes, when we berate
(11:32):
ourselves and constantly pick atour own work because it is never
quite good enough.
Also, when we see ourrelationships with other people
suffer, especially those who areclose to us or who must work
with us.
This happens because we imposeour own high unachievable
(11:55):
standards on everyone around us,and they cannot measure up,
causing both you and themfrustration.
Another sign of perfectionism inour lives is that frequent
feeling of disappointing God.
A dear friend of mine oncepointed out to me that we often
find our prayer time beingineffectual because we replace
(12:18):
fervency with apology.
This damages our relationshipwith God because we're not
growing in him praying forothers and for his will to be
done on earth as it is inheaven.
Instead, we are constantly inrepentance, not growth.
(12:38):
Let me quickly summarize thislesson.
It is really good to have it inour hearts to do all things to
the glory of God, but sometimeswe get confused about what that
looks like.
Instead of doing things withexcellence to glorify God, we
may find ourselves striving forperfection.
(13:00):
Excellence glorifies God, buildsrelationships with other people,
and helps us mature in our walkwith God.
Striving for perfection drawsattention to ourselves, causes
feelings of guilt and shame,harms our relationships with
other people, and does notcontribute to our Christian
(13:23):
maturity.
I encourage you today to observeyour own actions, attitudes, and
behavior in order to determineif you are striving for
excellence or perfection.
If the latter turn your facetoward God and diligently pursue
the characteristics ofexcellence, which will glorify
(13:44):
him and lead you into Christianmaturity.
We can be confident we areglorifying God when we pursue
excellence.
If you struggle with feelings ofguilt and shame and haven't
already listened toUnderstanding God's
Expectations, Letting Go ofGuilt and Shame, click on the
(14:05):
link in the show notes to accessit and listen to the short 12
minute episode.
That's it for today.
Please take a second tosubscribe to our show, so you'll
be notified when future episodescome out.
Also, it would mean the world tous if you would rate or review
our show.
That way more people can findout about it.
(14:29):
Until next time, let's beconfident in this, that he who
began a good work in you will befaithful to complete it.
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