Lewis Huckstep: The Inspired Life Method

In this episode of Conversations That Count, I sit down with the incredible Lewis Huckstep—coach, speaker, and author of The Inspired Life Method. We dive deep into the power of inner work, unpacking the triggers that shape us, the healing we all need, and how to truly step into our highest potential.

Lewis has an incredible way of breaking down personal growth and healing in a way that just hits different. His perspective on emotional intelligence, self-awareness, and transformation is something we all need to hear.

If you're ready to take ownership of your healing, reframe your triggers, and build an inspired life, this one’s for you.

🎧 Tune in now and let’s do the work together!

Episode Transcript

SPEAKER_00 (00:00):
Welcome to the podcast for Conversations That
Count.
So today I'm super excited tohave Lewis as one of my guests.
So thank you for joining me.

SPEAKER_02 (00:09):
Thank you, Anne.
Good to see you again.
We just bump into each other atevents.
Sorry, every time I say helloagain,

SPEAKER_00 (00:14):
we're here again.
It's synchronicities, right?
Like everything happens for areason.
100%.
Yeah.
And I'm excited for theconversation and where it's
going to go today because you'rea wealth of knowledge when it
comes to all things inner work,personal development, Healing
trauma.
You've got a book as well, whichis incredible.
Thank you.

(00:34):
So I want to, yeah, just gostraight into it and just see
where the conversation goesbecause I know it's going to be
so valuable.
So Lewis, tell me a little bitabout you.
I'm

SPEAKER_02 (00:46):
a human on this rock.
trying to do some meaningfulthings in the world.
I love helping people in ameaningful way.
I know that sounds a bit cringeto some people, but I help
people find their purpose, findtheir true self, help show them
how to give their gift back tothe world.
And for me, purpose is your giftto give back to the world.
So how do you find your purpose,your true self?

(01:08):
How do you remove all thoselimitations, those limiting
beliefs, those traumas, thosewounds that would stop you from
living out that purpose andgiving that purpose back and
that's kind of like the sort ofconscious and spiritual side to
me yeah And then the other sideis I'm super practical.
I'm very like, I say I'm kind ofDemartini, Joe Dispenza and Alex
Homozy put together where I'vegot the Homozy strategic,

(01:31):
practical, hustle, do the work,put the thing, take action.
And then I've got like that sortof inner work healing and like
working on yourself purpose sideto me.
So kind of blend those twoworlds together.

SPEAKER_00 (01:41):
Yeah, which is a perfect blend, right?
Because I think you need to haveboth to be successful as well.

SPEAKER_02 (01:46):
I take, there's like the spectrum of like one side,
you got your spiritual humansand they're levitating,
meditating Saging, crystallineall day.
And generally they're superhappy and fulfilled, but most of
them are very broke and theydon't do anything.
They're just being in themoment.
And then you've got your sort ofhustle porn people on the other
side where it's like grind,grind, hustle, hustle, sleep
when you're dead.
And I literally used to say thatas a catch line back in the day

(02:08):
where those people generallyhave more sort of external
achievement results, butgenerally very empty,
unfulfilled on the inside.
So it's like, how do you havethe best of both worlds?
And work hard, hustle, do thethings, achieve meaningful
things but also have that reallydeep sense of fulfillment
purpose and happiness

SPEAKER_00 (02:25):
so how do you actually find that balance
because you're right like I knowboth and like I'm trying to
integrate both as well what isbalance and balance is probably
like a pretty loose term thereas well but what Yeah.
How do you actually incorporateand integrate both?

SPEAKER_02 (02:42):
It's a cliche.
It's the inspired life method.
So it's all of those pieces puttogether.
So for me, it's knowing yourvalues.
Your values are the areas oflife that intrinsically fulfill
you.
And people think freedom,honesty, loyalty, integrity,
respect, and things like that.
Those for me aren't values.
They're behaviors and charactertraits.
It's like I always use freedomas an example.
I had our Dean who organizedthis podcast just before he came

(03:02):
on my podcast.
I was on his podcast too.
And it's like, I'll use you asan example.
If I gave you a billion dollarsright now, US, you instantly
have time and financial freedom.
Would you watch Netflix for therest of your life and do nothing
else?
Everyone says no.
So I'd say, what would you do?
What would your answers actuallybe?
If I said,

SPEAKER_00 (03:18):
I want to still have purpose and fulfillment.
What would that be though?
What would you do?
Well, I think it would be verysimilar to what I'm doing.
So outside the podcast, I alsodo coaching.
So

SPEAKER_02 (03:28):
coaching would be a value.
Keep going.

SPEAKER_00 (03:29):
Yep.
Have a business.
Cool.

SPEAKER_02 (03:30):
Business would

SPEAKER_00 (03:31):
be a value.
And then also for me, it'sexperiences and travel and grow.

SPEAKER_02 (03:35):
Awesome growth as well.
So you just listed some of yourvalues.
So those areas, when you do themto the fullest degree that you
can, you feel amazing.
You feel fulfilled.
Low self-worth is feedback.
You're not prioritizing yourvalues.
So picture that.
Yours was business, coaching,experiences, and learning.
Pretend you weren't able to doany of those.
How would you feel?
Oh my God.
Shit house.
And it would go down self-worth,low self-worth is feedback.

(03:56):
You're not living to yourvalues.
So that's kind of one piece ofthe fulfillment part.
The other piece is purpose.
Purpose is an expression of yourgreatest core wound.
They do tie into each otherbecause voids create values.
So all of those areas of yourlife would have been a void for
you at some level growing up.
You weren't, you would have hadpain around a void, pain or void
that can be different or thesame around learning

(04:16):
experiences, coaching andbusiness or wealth potentially,
depending how you categorize it.
And self, Your purpose is anexpression of your greatest core
wound.
Pain, purpose, wounds, wisdom.
So purpose is the big shininglight, the big lighthouse, the
big target that we move towards.
It gives you direction,fulfillment, and an unlimited
motivation or inspiration to getthere.

(04:37):
So the need for motivation is asymptom of an uninspired goal.
Like no one had to motivate meto be here today.
I wanted...
I could have said, no, I want itto be.
So it's like when you do whatyou love and you love what you
do, you don't need motivation.
So that's kind of thefulfillment part.
The third pillar to self, sothat's for me, the self-mastery
part.
So values, purpose, and thenmission and vision.

(04:59):
So that's the...
Mission is a measurable goalthat comes from your purpose.
So purpose is intrinsic, fluffy,you can't measure it.
Mine is to heal and raiseconsciousness.
My mission is a measurable goalthat comes from your purpose.
Mine is to coach 10 millionpeople to live a life that they
love.
And then when you have somethingmeasurable, you can break it
down into goals and strategy andstuff like that, which comes
later.
Vision is what your life lookslike once you hit the goal.

(05:21):
So they're on the same timehorizon.
One is more the measurable goalthat all roads lead to the
mission.
And then vision is like, What doyou want your life to look like
once you get there?
And I use your values to createyour vision because they're the
things that are meaningful toyou.
So that's kind of thefulfillment aspect of things.
It does also tie into the innerwork.
That's the other section to mymethod.
And that's where Livingtonbelieves trauma and emotional

(05:42):
blocks, where we want to removethose sabotaging patterns,
thoughts, beliefs, and thingsthat are stopping you from being
the best version of you.
The Statue of David quote getsused a lot in self-growth.
Are you familiar with the Statueof David?
So Michelangelo sculpted theStatue of David.
And supposedly, and I doresearch for this for my book,
apparently there's no actualrecord of this quote, but
apparently it's just beencredited to him.

(06:04):
Apparently, someone asked him,how do you make such a beautiful
statue?
And he said, apparently, Davidwas always in the statue.
I just removed everything thatwasn't him.
And so that's like coming backto your true self.
So your purpose and values andall parts of you is your true
self.
But then we pick up theselimitations of you're too much,
you're not enough.
You have trauma that thencreates walls and fisonas and

(06:25):
coping mechanisms which protectand hide the true version of
you.
So we want to remove all thoselayers of who you think you need
to be and should be and got tobe and come back to who you
truly are.
That also ties back into thefulfillment authentic piece.
And then the skills andstrategies part, which is the
third pillar.
And that's where it's like,what's the plan?
What are you achieving?
How are you breaking it down?
Tony Robbins, I heard this yearsago, like 10 years ago when I

(06:46):
first started my growth withTony.
And he said, Success is the artof...
The science of achievement andthe art of fulfillment.
The science is like...
It's measurable.
There's sort of rules andfoundational things you have to
live by.
Like to be relatively fit andhealthy, there's calories,
nutrition, training, sleep,hydration.

(07:06):
If you don't do those, you'renot going to achieve the things
you want to.
But then he talks about the artof fulfillment where it's unique
to anyone.
So what fulfills you?
So you use experiences.
I don't value experiences.
So I work...
I go to the gym.
I hang out with my wife.
I hang out with my sausage dogs.
I play video games and I don'tlike traveling.
I don't like doing experiences.
So that fulfills you.

(07:27):
That doesn't fulfill me.
And that's okay.
That's our differences.
That's our unique gifts.
So blending all those togetherand learning how to prioritize
those and there's nuances withinit, but those all put together
is my inspired life method.
And that's how you can know whoyou are, know what you truly
want, know how you're going toget there practically.
And we remove all those internalblocks that are going to stop
you from getting there.

SPEAKER_00 (07:46):
Yeah, I love that.
And I have so many questionslike in all of those pillars.
So let's go back to the firstpillar around purpose.
Because I feel like it's amassive generalisation.
And, you know, we're bothbuilding businesses and things
like that.
So I feel like we're probably...
you know, definitely on our, onour path.
Um, but people that arepotentially going to work and

(08:09):
waking up doing the nine to fivethat they hate.
And then they're like, I hatethis.
I just like, I don't know.
I isn't, I'm feeling unfulfilledand I don't know what my purpose
is.
Like, how do you, how do youtell someone or show someone to
actually find their purpose inlike maybe a employee kind of
perspective?

SPEAKER_02 (08:26):
Yeah.
Um, look, your purpose is yourpurpose.
Um, it's, I used to be superextreme with my business, uh,
thoughts so I started withnetwork marketing that's where I
started back in the day and itwas like very extreme if you
don't quit your job you're notfull in you're not committed to
this business so I'm not likethat anymore but I used to be
like that so it's like you'vegot to pay your bills so it's
not like I need to find mypurpose I'm going to quit my job

(08:47):
and then I can't pay my rent Idon't believe in that it's like
everyone's doing the best ofwhat they have everyone right
now has been the best version oftheir limited self so it's like
you're doing the best of whatyou have right now

SPEAKER_01 (08:57):
yeah

SPEAKER_02 (08:58):
So you start with where you are, then find your
purpose.
I have a purpose process.
It's a set of questions that youcan find.
It takes about 20 minutes tofind it.
Once you know the questions,once you have the formula, you
can do it.
I do that in my book, in mycourses, my events.
So once you find your purpose,your purpose is an expression of
your greatest core wound.
I mentioned that earlier.
Another way to say that is youbecome who you needed when

(09:19):
you're at your lowest.
So what was painful and youneeded at your lowest moment
where you had your core wound,what you needed then, you become
that version of that.
Now you become that person.
And then when you can learn howto give that back to others in a
way you can get paid to do it.
Yeah.
Life is good.
Now, you can do that.
There's four pathways I talkabout.
There's one, work a job youhate, never change.

(09:39):
Don't do this one.
But again, if you're there rightnow and you've got to pay the
bills, do what you need to do.
Then around work, pay yourbills.
There's benefits to what you'redoing.
There'll be opportunities,networking, the financial part,
of course.
But outside of that, then startto do some inner work, invest
into yourself, do courses,books, podcasts, like whoever's
listening to you right now.

(09:59):
And then second pathway is builda career or business aligned
with your purpose and values.
Because I believe everyone couldbe an entrepreneur, not
everyone's willing to.
And it's because of sacrifice,effort, the uncertainty, the
facing off with your triggersand all the shit.
So it's like just not everyone'swilling to do that.
And that's totally fine.
I'm sure that sometimes you'vethought like, fuck, mate, why

(10:19):
the fuck am I doing this?
Why don't I just go get a job?
It's so much easier.
All this risk and all thisjudgment.
So that's the second pathway.
Third pathway is focus.
Build a business that gives youfinancial freedom and leverage
to do what you want.
So it's not necessarily abusiness that you're super
passionate about.
It's purely for making money.
And there's nothing wrong withthat.
And I did that with the gymswhen I was in that world.
And then fourth is build apurpose-led business.

(10:43):
One of my favorite quotes, whenwhat you do is the fullest
expression of who you are, youwill do your life's best work.
So when you know your purpose,you know your values, you know
your gift, and you give it backto others in a way that you can
get paid to do it, life is good.
So they're the four pathways youcan choose from.
Don't...
Judge yourself for where youare.
You're doing the best of whatyou have with the skills that
you have, the mindset that youhave and all those things.

(11:04):
But if you then want to change,you've got to change.
What Jim Rohn says, if you wantlife to get better, you've got
to get better.
So that's where take thatownership, take that
responsibility.
And if you're listening to thispodcast, you're already taking
some great steps.
And then start to just worktowards the thing that you want.
Start to do the books, start todo the podcast, come to events,
do the thing.
Just work on yourself.
Figure out what you need to movetowards what you want.
And you'll get there eventually.

SPEAKER_00 (11:25):
So inner work.
It's a pretty broad topic.
And I...
I love your content, and I'vebeen following you now for years
as well.
Thank you.
And you speak a lot intotriggers, trauma, self-sabotage.
Done your homework.
I love it.
Yeah, well, I don't actuallyknow if you know this.
When I first moved to the GoldCoast, probably about nearly

(11:45):
four years ago, I was trialinggyms around the coast.
Oh, did you come

SPEAKER_02 (11:49):
down for a

SPEAKER_00 (11:49):
trial?
I did.
Hey, nice.
And you were there.
Nice.
Which one?

SPEAKER_02 (11:53):
Burley?

SPEAKER_00 (11:53):
Yeah, the one at Burley, which has now changed.

SPEAKER_02 (11:56):
Yeah, the franchise went bankrupt.
So, yeah, that's a hectic storyabout...
We can talk about that if youwant, but that was hectic.
That's funny.
Your face does look familiar.
And obviously I've met you sincethen.
What was I like back then?
What was your perception of meback then?
Because I was like hustle pornback then.
No judgment.
Say whatever you want.

SPEAKER_00 (12:14):
Okay, so, and also knowing that this is a
reflection of me.
So when I first moved to theGold Coast, I moved here for a
reason.
I needed to change myenvironment.
I was living in Brisbane and Iwas like, do you know what?
I need to change.
I've always wanted to live atthe beach.
I'm just going to do it.
I didn't know anyone.
I just bought a place and I waslike, just go all in,

SPEAKER_01 (12:34):
right?

SPEAKER_00 (12:35):
And then so I was like, okay, I want to find
community and I want to find agym.
Travelling different gyms.
And then I came into yours andyou're so confident as a person.

UNKNOWN (12:44):
Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 (12:44):
And I was pretty guarded back then.
I was like, this is my bubble.
Why are you in my bubble?

SPEAKER_02 (12:51):
Did I try to hug you?

SPEAKER_00 (12:52):
Yeah, you did.
You came in, you gave me thisbig hug and stuff like that.
Oh my God, welcome.
And I was like, who the fuck isthis guy?
And you were so warm and you'relike, what are your goals?
What's this?
And stuff like that, which isgreat.
And that's what you want from atrainer,

SPEAKER_01 (13:07):
right?
Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 (13:08):
I wasn't used to that.
So I found it prettyconfronting.
And then once I've like, I'vegone so deep into like personal
development and obviouslyknowing that that was me, right.
And the walls that I had up andnot receiving that at the same
time.
And it's interesting before Istarted bumping into again and
in various events, like I stillremember that and how I reacted

(13:31):
and it was just purely me.
And I, Yeah, like that I did allthis work and now I'm just like,
yeah, cool, give us a hug.
I'm such a hugger now.
I'm such a

SPEAKER_02 (13:42):
hugger, full stop.

SPEAKER_00 (13:44):
And it's nice though, like even when I meet
people, I'm like, oh yeah, go infor a hug and stuff like that.
But yeah, that was like, it wasinteresting because it really
triggered me.

SPEAKER_02 (13:53):
Thank you for the reflection.

SPEAKER_00 (13:57):
Actually, let's just go down triggers because that's
probably a really good exampleas well because everyone has
triggers and it's not about theother person.
It's always about the individualand the experience that they're
having.
What's your definition oftriggers and how do they play
out in everyday life?

SPEAKER_02 (14:17):
A trigger is revealing a part of you you
haven't worked on.
There's two things that create atrigger and then there's two
types of triggers.
So I'll go...
top down.
So you will attract people incircumstances to reveal where
you haven't healed and nothingtriggers you.
It reveals what's inside of yououtside of fight or flight.
If a tiger walks into this room,we're both going to get
triggered, but it's that's fightor flight.

(14:37):
So Peter Crane has this reallygreat quote.
He says, if it's not egothreatening, it's just life.
Sorry.
If it's not life threatening,it's just ego threatening.
So if you're not actually indanger, like someone's got a gun
to your head, someone's about tobeat you up.
You're about to get hit by a caror something.
If you're not actually in dangerand you're, triggered.
It is something within you beingrevealed.
Now, what can it be?

(14:58):
It will be a limiting belief orit will be a trauma.
Trauma, my definition of traumais a trait or a behavior that
was bad, wrong, too much, notenough.
It's someone did something ordidn't do something that was bad
or wrong.
And we can break that down in amoment.
So when you get triggered, it'srevealing a part of you that you
haven't worked on, either atrait or a behavior you haven't
healed or a limiting belief.

(15:19):
Let's use some examples.
So limiting beliefs, I usereligion as an extreme example
of this.
It's like, think of someone andit might be you as the person
listening.
Are you heavily religious by anychance?
So do you know anyone who is,who's like, like, This is my
religion.
If I went up to that person andsaid, your religion is full of
shit.
It's wrong.
It's a lie.
It's a cult.
It's a scam.
And they were very rigid withtheir beliefs.

(15:40):
They would probably gettriggered by that because I'm
challenging a belief of theirs.
So if you get triggered,someone's challenging a belief
of yours.
And I cop that all the time withmy content, with all the things
I'm talking about.
If you want some popcorncontent, go read the comments of
some of my videos.
The second part is a trait.
So trauma is a trait or abehavior.
And it will be, I'll list outsome.

(16:00):
There's 4,628 traits that humanbeings can display.
So whatever ones you think arebad, wrong, or too much or not
enough at some point, you gettriggered or activated by them.
Common ones that I've dealt withmy clients, rejection,
abandonment, criticism, control,manipulation, dismissing, lying,
anger, list goes on.
Now, the two types of triggers.

(16:21):
So there's two things that willtrigger you, limiting beliefs
and traits or behaviors traumathen the two types of trigger
are these when you perceivesomeone or something that
reminds you of the trauma itwill trigger you let's use an
example so this can be practicalum i'm gonna ask you a question
about your parents don't judgeyour answers i'm sure you love
your parents but just answer thequestions which parent do you
dislike the most if you had toanswer

SPEAKER_01 (16:42):
it my dad

SPEAKER_02 (16:43):
beautiful in one word what's the thing you
dislike most about dad

SPEAKER_01 (16:46):
anger

SPEAKER_02 (16:46):
beautiful so you have an anger wound so when
someone's angry towards you itwill trigger you now so that's
one type of the the triggers.
The other type is you willsubconsciously try to protect
yourself from experiencing thatwound again.
So you will...
If someone's like...
Maybe you avoid conflict as anexample.
So...
If say someone, you want to tellsomeone something, but you think

(17:07):
they're going to get angry,you'll try not do it.
I don't want to get angerbecause that's painful.
So they're the two types oftriggers.
It's the, you experience it andit activates you or you
subconsciously get anxious orfearful or whatever it is
because you're trying to protectyourself from it.
This becomes a glass ceiling.
So when people say, I get in myown way, I keep sabotaging my
stuff, is you're trying toprotect your wounds or that to

(17:27):
the limits and beliefs.
Your ego is your human identity.

UNKNOWN (17:31):
Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_02 (17:31):
Your ego avoids pain and proves itself right.
So it reinforces its ownlimitations.
So the sabotaging patterns, howthey play out is you've got
coping mechanisms from traumawhere you get triggered or
you're protecting yourself fromit or you're reinforcing your
own beliefs.
I'm going to prove to myselfthat I'm not enough and then you
fuck up whatever you fuck up.
So that's my answer.

SPEAKER_00 (17:50):
Yeah, it's interesting you said about the
anger.
It's because like I, and youwere bang on right there, and
how it all played out like in myearly 20s and stuff like that,
and the people I was attractedinto my life as well.
And then when I started goingdeep into this work, and I
remember a friend got reallyangry at me, like to the point

(18:11):
was talking down to me, like hissix, six, seven or six.
What's the trait?

SPEAKER_02 (18:16):
So when he's talking down to you, say that in one
word, what was he doing?

SPEAKER_00 (18:19):
Anger.

SPEAKER_02 (18:20):
Anger,

SPEAKER_00 (18:20):
cool.
Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 (18:21):
It might have been like demoralizing or criticizing
or condescending.
There might have been othertraits.
There's surrounding traits, butkeep

SPEAKER_00 (18:28):
going.
And I remember him doing thatand I held it like so much.
And I was like, I used to belike...
just agree with them to shutthem up so then I could walk
away and go yeah cool like Idon't care enough to actually
fight this and I was like hangon no this is not right and
through that it made me realizehow much of like the anger that

(18:49):
I had been pushing away and sothen I started like actively
working on that as well and it'sjust opened up so much more like
in terms of relationships thepeople I'm attracted into my
life and it's not as if likepeople are angry at me or like
there's conflict or anythinglike that but you now have
healthy discussions that youknow you can say your points of
view and you don't have to agreeor you can just lean into the

(19:11):
discomfort of the conversation

SPEAKER_02 (19:13):
when you heal those parts those the resistance to
the trait being because whatevertraits you have resistance to
you think they're bad you willtry to be the opposite of the
trait so instead of being angryit might be nice or loving or
soft or sweet or something likethat and Once you then heal that
part or you do a process on thattrait, then the resistance to

(19:34):
the trait goes away.
Then you'll stop being triggeredby it.
You'll stop getting triggered byit.
And you'll be okay embodying andexpressing it.
Because there's no...
It's a big claim and people gettriggered by it.
Something to work on.
But I don't believe there's asingle bad trait.
And people say abuse,abandonment, anger, rape,
assault, selfish, controlling,all the things.

(19:54):
It's a...
Have you seen the movie EvanAlmighty?
No.
It's got Bruce, Jim Carrey, andMorgan Freeman in it.
I actually posted the video thismorning on my Instagram.
And the clip is, I'm going toreword the clip, but the message
is the same.
It's like when this woman'scomplaining about life and
Morgan Freeman, plain God, comesover to this woman and says, you

(20:14):
know when you wish for strength,you don't get given strength.
You get given problems andchallenges that make you strong.
When you wish for love, youdon't get given love.
You often receive people who areunloving towards you.
So it's like the traits that arequite bad have given you things
that you needed to receive thatbad trait to receive it.
And that's the gift of thetrait.
So yeah, once you balance orheal that part, you'll embody it

(20:36):
more.
You won't have shame towards it.
You won't try, be the oppositeto it.
And then the triggers and allthe coping mechanisms and
resistance, it just goes away.
And that's the work.

SPEAKER_00 (20:46):
When I used to think about like healing and trauma
and, um in the past i used to gooh i'm i'm good like i'm happy
i'm content thinking that to fortrauma or inner work you had to
go through like a significant

SPEAKER_02 (21:01):
big t trauma

SPEAKER_00 (21:02):
yeah exactly right where trauma can be like you
know you move from onerelationship to the other and
you don't take the lessons sothen the same pattern repeats so
how would you actually describetrauma or healing great

SPEAKER_02 (21:16):
question great question so yeah so trauma for
me is quite a spectrum trauma isa lopsided perception towards a
trait so that's very Demartiniif anyone that's into his work
so whatever traits and behaviorsyou think are bad and because at
the extreme end that could beabuse abandonment rejection
narcissism even though for menarcissism is a label to
describe many traits and peopleget triggered when I say that as

(21:36):
well so Whatever traits andbehaviors you get triggered by
or you think are bad, those areyour lopsided perceptions.
And depending how emotionallycharged you are towards it, you
could then label it as trauma.
So trauma for me, trauma is amoment in time where a trait or
a behavior was bad, wrong, toomuch or not enough.
And depending how...
much resistance or emotionalcharge is in that moment, that

(22:00):
it's, quote, more traumatic thanothers.
And that's where a book, You'reNot Broken by Dr.
Sarah Woodhouse, she categorizesas big T traumas and other T
traumas.
It's just wherever you gettriggered.
And people say, I've got notrauma.
I say, I've never met a singlehuman who's not triggered.

SPEAKER_01 (22:14):
Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 (22:14):
Because the trigger is revealing it.
So, and when you get triggered,the best thing to do, actually,
I'll do it with you as apractical example, but for the
listeners, listen to it, do ityourself.
Think of the last time you gottriggered.
When's the last time you gottriggered?

SPEAKER_00 (22:26):
Yesterday.

SPEAKER_02 (22:27):
Beautiful.
Go to the moment and close youreyes if it helps the listeners
as well.
Go to the moment when you gottriggered.
Tell me what happened when yougot triggered.

SPEAKER_00 (22:35):
Talking about business and just having
different opinions on the visionand the path.

SPEAKER_02 (22:40):
Cool.
And what did the other person orpeople involved, what did they
do or not do when you got totrigger you?

SPEAKER_00 (22:46):
Listen.

SPEAKER_02 (22:47):
Beautiful.
So they didn't listen?
Beautiful.
So what's the trait that theydid?
So in that moment, what werethey doing or not doing that
triggered you?

SPEAKER_00 (22:53):
Um, not listening and me feeling like that they
were putting their opinion onme.

SPEAKER_02 (22:59):
Cool.
So say that in one word, yousaid not listening.
So there's kind of two traitshere.
Say not listening in one word.

SPEAKER_00 (23:06):
Um,

SPEAKER_02 (23:06):
invalidation sounds like something.

SPEAKER_00 (23:07):
Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 (23:09):
Dismissing, invalidating,

SPEAKER_00 (23:10):
suppressing.

SPEAKER_02 (23:11):
Beautiful.
So you have a wound arounddismissment or being dismissed.
Yeah.
So when people dismiss you, ittriggers you.
Now that will come from a momentin time where someone dismissed
you and it was painful.
Now, depending how emotionallycharging that is, that could be
quite trauma or just a momentthat pissed you off.
So to circle up your question isany traits or behaviors that you
think are bad and you gettriggered by is something you

(23:33):
haven't worked on.
And again, how much charge goesinto it, you could call it
trauma or a lopsided perception.

SPEAKER_00 (23:38):
And like with that particular scenario yesterday,
and this is why inner work is sogood because you can catch
yourself in those moments whenyou can feel it in your body,
but then it's like theconversation that you have after
that.
So I was able to communicatethat and we were able to have an
open conversation about it andgo, this is how I'm perceiving
this to be and vice versa.

(24:00):
And then we had like a reallypositive outcome.
So how do you set up that typeof relationship where– Because
if you're feeling triggered, youcan't just go, oh my God, I'm
feeling triggered.
Stop what you're doing typething.
Like you have to be in a safeenvironment at the same time
where you are kind of being seenand that.
How do you actually build thatsafety with someone else,

(24:22):
whether it's in like a romanticrelationship or even at work or
in a friendship?

SPEAKER_02 (24:27):
So always take ownership on your own stuff.
So when you get triggered, it'sfor you to work on.
And I do...
talk the difference of triggersand boundaries.
So I use this cliche example allthe time, but at home, I work
from home, when my door isclosed to my office, my boundary
or expectation is my wifedoesn't come inside because I'll
be working with clients, I'll bedoing things, I'll be in flow,

(24:49):
whatever.
Say she barges into me whilstI'm on a call or something.
If I turn around and snap at herand get triggered and say, get
the fuck out of the office orwhatever, I could say, that's a
trigger.
That's me.
I get to take the ownership ofthat and I get to work on that
later.
Because I could say, hey, babe,is everything okay?
What's going on?
Look, I'm busy right now.
I'll be with you in 30 minutes.
Why couldn't I do that?
Because the first example I gottriggered.

(25:10):
So there are differences betweentriggers and boundaries.
So don't dismiss a boundary.
So it's like, look, it's aboundary, but it's how you react
to it.
Are you reacting from atriggered space?
So there's that angle from it.
But then I also talk aboutmaintenance versus progress
tools.
So Because at the moment, whenyou're in a meeting, in this
thing, life doesn't give a fuckhow you feel.
Business don't care if you'retriggered or not, right?

(25:31):
So the show must go on.
You must continue, right?
So it's like, if I get triggeredright now, it's like, fuck,
we're recording, we're on.
So maintenance tools is what doyou do in the moment to maintain
yourself through the moment?
So for me, breathwork is myfavorite one.
So I'm a breathwork facilitatorwith Chris and Shani that you're
having on the podcast soon.
Did you have them on or are you

SPEAKER_01 (25:49):
having them on?

SPEAKER_02 (25:49):
Had them on.
So I did my training with themand For me, I love doing a
diaphragm reset.
So you breathe really slow, slowdown your breathing, do box
breathing, push into yourdiaphragm and also reframe the
situation.
So that's what you can do in themoment to get through it.
There's also Tony Robbins, thetriad, change your state for
any, the triad, it's focus,physiology and what's the other

(26:10):
one?
Language.
So what do you tell yourself?
What are you focusing on and howare you moving your body?
So that's the triad and I anchorclicking.
If you notice, I click all thetime.
So I've anchored confidence toclicking.
So those are my two favoritetools to, do maintenance tools.
So in the moment you got to getthrough it.
So, and you know, I never healanything in the moment.
Show must go on.
So get through the storm,whether you're at work or

(26:32):
whether you're at home andyou've treated each other with
your partner.
Welcome to relationships, by theway, that's meant to happen.
Um, I don't focus on healing inthe, in the storm, get through
the storm and then self reflectto find what was revealed, then
process it.
And then, so maintenance toolsget through the moment progress
tools as we identify what wastriggered and revealed to start

(26:52):
with, and then heal through itbecause depending on the tool,
and this is where I've had a bitof a dig at breath work and just
some tools, because if you justkeep doing maintenance tools,
you never do the progress tools.
So, um, and I've done videos onthis and then, just to disclaim
that there's no ultimate martialart only the ultimate martial
artist who knows every martialart and uses the right one at

(27:12):
the right time to get the rightresult so breathwork does work
at the right time and rightplace but if you have a hammer
everything looks like a nail soI've had people who um in the
spiritual circles they do plantmedicine every weekend they do
breath work every weekend it'slike yes for example say you get
triggered and then you breathethrough it and you maintain
yourself you get through itfantastic if you never reflect
to find what got triggered andyou never actually address that

(27:34):
the same thing's going to gettriggered again and that's where
you keep repeating the sameproblems you repeat problems
until you learn the lessonsthat's it's there to teach you
so that's why right tool righttime when you're triggered don't
heal just breathe get throughthe moment have the meeting,
have the phone call, do thething.
Then when you've got some timeand space, reflect and do a
progress tool to remove thelimiting belief, to heal the
trait or wound.
And then that same thing won'ttrigger you again.

(27:56):
And then the next thing will popup and then we heal through
that.
And then that's the journey ofhealing.

SPEAKER_00 (28:02):
Actually, Chris and I did speak about that in the
podcast where people just tryand mindset it straight away
where it's like, okay, first ofall, you're coming from a
dysregulated state.
So regulate nervous systemfirst.
And then that's when the mindsetcomes into play and actually
makes sense of it as wellbecause otherwise the same shit
is going to come up.

SPEAKER_02 (28:18):
Yeah.
And because when you don't seethings the way they are, you see
things the way you are.
If you're in a triggered state,you see hurt, you see fear, you
see anxiety, all those things.
So come back to baseline, comeback to neutral it's like in my
work I do an emotionalregulation piece so I teach in
my Preferred sequence so far formost people, values, purpose,
mission, vision, teach innerwork, the different bodies, the

(28:39):
five bodies to heal through.
I do a regulate emotions andnervous system, which is
everything I just said, breathe,diaphragm reset, and reframe the
situation, and then get intoinner work.
So then when you are doing innerwork, when your emotions do come
up, because that's probablygoing to happen, when you need
to, because there are moments inmy processes where I actually
get people to feel the emotions,because that's part of the
emotional body to get thosesuppressed emotions out of you.

(29:01):
Feel it.
Healing is in the feeling,right?
Yeah.
So feel it, but then when it'stime to then move on to the next
part, let's get back tobaseline, let's keep pushing
forward.
So yeah, right tool, right

SPEAKER_00 (29:09):
place.
Do you think you can ever fullyheal?

SPEAKER_02 (29:13):
No, I don't believe it.
That's my belief.
I'm just yet to see anyone.
The only like...
Caveat, I haven't seen it, butI've heard of it, is like people
that meditate all day, likemonks.
But I would say that-

SPEAKER_00 (29:24):
Who's got time for that?
Seriously.

SPEAKER_02 (29:25):
But that's me.
I would argue that they're notshowing up to life.
That's dissociation.

SPEAKER_00 (29:30):
It's like a void.
It's voiding.
So

SPEAKER_02 (29:31):
if you and me just meditate all day and don't show
up, so to reframe it, if you'resomeone who's living life and
you're showing up on your edge,your edge is like your- comfort
zone on the edge of your comfortzone to get uncomfortable you're
going to have triggers woundsthings come up the more work you
do though they obviously becomemore subtle so like i used to
get super triggered in socialsettings i i have wounds around

(29:51):
anxiety um uh awkwardness umrejection judgment criticism
those used to trigger me a lotso i used to get super triggered
going to social settings to evenlike a podcast like this but
i've done processes on them Sothey don't trigger me anymore.
It's like they just become moresubtle.
Like it's a projection.
It's like how you...
You walk into a room and youdon't like someone for some

(30:12):
reason.
You might not hate them.
It's not like you're going to goattack them.
But it's like you...
You repel to the other side ofthe room.
It's like you go to the gym andthere's just someone at the gym.
You just don't like them.
You're like, I just don't vibewith you.
Okay, what's the trait orbehavior?
The two questions.
What are they doing or who arethey being that you don't like?
One word answer.
There'll be a trait or abehavior.
Are they weird?
Are they creepy?
Are they awkward?

(30:33):
Are they strange?
Are they fake?
Are they hypocritical?
What are they doing or notdoing?
And that is a part of you youhaven't healed yet.
Perception is a projection.
So you're projecting onto them apart of you you haven't worked
on yet.
And that's the mirror where youget to come back to you and work
on

SPEAKER_00 (30:45):
you.
And really, I believe if you canunderstand that particular
concept, that is the gateway toall of this inner work because
everyone that is walking around,what you see in them, you see in
yourself and you just need towork through that.

SPEAKER_02 (31:00):
People say, I don't know where I need to heal next.
Just when do you get triggeredlast?
Who don't you like?
Who wouldn't you want to hangaround with?
Who pisses you off?
Who would you not want to spendtime with right now?
Who would you hate to sit nextto right now?
And I normally start withbecause the reason parents is
because when you're youngeryou're more sensitive so it's
like you come home you're fiveyears old from preschool
whatever year one however oldyou are and you've spent all day

(31:23):
making this little painting andit looks like absolute shit and
you run home and you're like ohmy god mum and dad I've made
this little painting it's sogood and it's like so and
they're like from ages I think Ijust read a parenting book I'm
going to read it for kids laterbut I think zero to three or
five I know zero to seven is theimprint zone but I think zero to
three or five your parents areyou they're gods so there's like
they are everything rethink toyou so say you come home from

(31:45):
school whatever you got yourpainting and you're like oh my
god mom and dad look at this andthey're busy so business
happened career happened carbroke down they're like little
sally i'm busy go away rejectionyou just had a rejection wound
in that moment so when peoplereject you it triggers you so
that comes back to your questionoh i haven't had those big t
traumas it can be little momentslike that that's why i generally
start with parents because yeahum and some people parents get

(32:07):
like oh my god i fucked up mykids no uh and to challenge that
i believe trauma is a gift onceyou heal it once you do a
healing process on any trait orbehavior that's bad you open the
gifts that come along with itand then you stop and all the
things so um yeah i don't knowwhat that question was but

SPEAKER_00 (32:24):
that's where we end up do you think that someone can
fully heal

SPEAKER_02 (32:26):
yeah yeah i don't believe so i just i would love
to meet someone who's nevertriggered who shows up to life

SPEAKER_00 (32:32):
yeah

SPEAKER_02 (32:32):
if if i meet someone like that Well, there's 4,628
traits.
So let's say half of them arebad.
So you'd have to do 2,314processes on that.
I've done like 20 start tofinish processes where I sit
down and do my balancing processor a Demartini process or
holographic process start tofinish.
And I've done that 20 timesstart to finish, which takes

(32:55):
about...
45 minutes to three hours to doa full process.
I've done 20 of those and mostof them with mom, dad,
ex-partners, current partners,myself.
And I do mini processes.
I've got like a mini shortcutprocess that you can do.
I probably had hundreds ofhundreds of those.
So when you get that trigger,here's a shortcut version for
people.
When you get triggered in themoment, like I said, regulate,

(33:16):
get through it, but a reallynice one you can do after you,
like as soon as you have like 30seconds of spare time is like,
Three questions.
What's the trait?
What did this person do or notdo that I don't like?
They rejected me.
They dismissed you in thatexample from before.
Dismissed.
Second question, where have Idone the trait before?
Own the trait.
It's a part of you.
And what we do is we block.
That can be hard for people.

(33:36):
I've never done that bullshit.
You're just hiding it.
That's your strategy.
You're trying to keep it asecret.
So find five references of youdoing the trait.
Third question, what's thebenefit to this person doing the
trait to me right now?
You do that, you'll neutralizeyour mind very quickly and then
you can move on a lot easier.
I do that all the time becauseI'll have those mirror moments
where I judge someone like, oh,what is it?
Or awkward, hypocrite, cringe,whatever the thing is.

(33:59):
I share this funny story.
I drove out of my complex.
It was about a year ago, and Iwas driving.
I'm at a red light, and I get agreen light, and now I'm turning
to turn right.
Someone who's on the other sideof the lights starts to inch
their way forward through a redlight into where I'm driving.
So they're about to hit me.
So I drive through, and I lookover to them like, what the fuck

(34:22):
are you doing?
And this lady's super sour facehas her finger at me out the
window.
And I got triggered a littlebit.
I'm like, what the fuck?
Anyway, so I'm like, what's thetrait?
Anger.
Easy.
Where have I been angry before?
Boom, nailed it out.
What's the benefit of her beingangry to me right now?
She woke me up.
She put a smile on my face.
She made me more conscious.
She helped me be more consciousand more aware of myself.

(34:44):
She helped me heal a little bitmore.
Beautiful.
And then I got to move on withmy day.
I didn't then know, fuck you.
I didn't even toot back orwhatever.
So it's like that reflectionmoment, that mini little process
I just talked through allows youto stay pretty poised throughout
your day so you don't have thesehuge emotional swings.

SPEAKER_00 (34:58):
And I think that that's a really valid point
where when we're in thosemoments, we can externalize it
and we can kind of slip into, Idon't want to say victim
mentality, but in a way it'slike that blame game, right?
Like you could have gone, oh myGod, it's all your fault and
stuff like that.
But it's like, yeah, it'sactually an internal reflection.
So how can you bring it back toyourself and go, well, it's
actually not about them.

(35:18):
It's about me.

SPEAKER_02 (35:19):
Now that triggers you, it reveals what's inside of
you.
So I think it's, I got it from,Joe Dispenza, but his definition
of victim is anything externalaffects you internally.
That is the definition ofvictim.
Something external has affectedme internally.
So that sort of encapsulatesoutside of real fight or flight.

(35:39):
I would put that caveat thereagain.
Outside of real fight or flight.

SPEAKER_00 (35:43):
And this is where I think it's really powerful to
understand what's in yourcontrol, what's out of your
control.
Like comes back to like, youknow, like, you know, tiger or
whatever.
But yeah, what's in yourcontrol?
So I have control of how I reactand how I behave, my thoughts
and everything like that.
So if you're trying toexternalize that to a partner or
a colleague or a friend orsomething like that, it's not
about them, it's about you.

SPEAKER_02 (36:02):
Yeah.
And there's that...
nuance to the boundaries part aswell though so it's again I'm
not saying because some peopletake the work of like okay if
I'm just never triggered I'lljust allow people to walk away
from me never stand up formyself I didn't say that it's
like if you're triggered lookwithin work on you but then also
have standards and boundariesyou have for yourself so it's
like look I love you it's likeit's like say someone say

(36:22):
hypothetically my wife doessomething she just I get home
from this podcast and she juststarts like attacking me and
yelling at me I'll say are youokay what's happened like
regulate what's happened are youtriggered give I always give
grace because you don't knowwhat's happened in the day start
with love start with empathy andthen afterwards if say she just
kept doing i'd say look i loveyou my love and i want to be
with you but i don't appreciatethe way you're treating me if
you continue to do this i'll belooking at moving away or ending

(36:44):
this relationship or thismarriage because that's a
boundary for me but so againjust that caveat with boundaries
and triggers

SPEAKER_00 (36:50):
as well and it's interesting because like you you
have to you're always constantlytelling people how to treat you
and and stuff as well by whatyou accept and so it's about
communicating that as well so iflike that like as you said your
partner like It's over sort ofboundary.
It's up to you to communicatethat.
Otherwise, she'll keep doing it.
And she'll think that you'reaccepting

SPEAKER_02 (37:10):
that.
You get in life what youtolerate.
So I've got this, I've got amodule in my community of
setting healthy boundaries andit's along the lines of, I give
them a script of how to do it.
It's like, hey friend or heyperson, it's like, look, I just
want to let you know in caseyou're not aware because they
might not even be aware that'sthe boundary for you.
Like you said, some people justlike kind of suck it up and
people please and bite thetongue and not speak because

(37:30):
they might be protectingthemselves from rejection or a
wound or something.
So I love that.
I love what you said.

SPEAKER_00 (37:36):
Yeah.
how did you get into this workbecause like I love this work so
much and it's a really passionof mine as well and from my
upbringing and you know all mylife experiences as well how did
you get here

SPEAKER_02 (37:52):
um

SPEAKER_00 (37:53):
there's a pretty big question

SPEAKER_02 (37:54):
yeah there's the practical like what what were
like the sort of checkpointsthroughout my career and journey
I can do that or the sort of Mypurpose was like the...
My core wound...

SPEAKER_00 (38:03):
Yeah, let's talk through your purpose.

SPEAKER_02 (38:05):
My core wound is hurt, rejection and
misunderstood.
So that was...
I got diagnosed with Asperger's,autism, ADHD.
Autism and Asperger's getcategorized under the same
banner these days.
Back then not.
Had a lot of mental, emotional,physical abuse through
upbringing through parents and Ijust struggled a lot with my
nervous system.
I was really dysregulated.
I...

(38:25):
struggle with connecting withpeople.
So relationships andcommunication and learning was
painful.
I was in learning disabledclasses.
My handwriting still fucked thisday.
If you read my handwriting, it'sstill horrible.
I was the last person in mygrade to get a pen license.
If you remember those things.
And so those were all like the,the seeds that were planted.
So those were like, those arethe core wounds that will become
meaningful to me now.
So that's, that's the why part.

(38:46):
So purpose.
So core wounds is hurt,rejected, misunderstood, uh,
Purpose, that's the core one,the expression of that, my
purpose is to heal and raiseconsciousness.
And then the mission, which Ispoke about before.
So that's the reason why I'veended up here.
Whenever you get tears ofinspiration, you're perceiving a
piece of your purpose.

(39:06):
So they're the breadcrumbs theuniverse is leading you.
And second to that, it wouldjust be when you feel inspired,
you feel energized, you feeljust your heart open just a
little bit.
So if you just listen and followwhat inspires you, you're going
to end up doing what you loveand you'll end up doing your
purpose.
It's just most people aren'tconscious of the breadcrumbs.
So doing my purpose process andvalues and all those things

(39:28):
speeds that up.
So it just gives you all thatawareness so you can go execute.
The practical sort of way thatlooked like.
I became an overachiever.
Tried to prove my worth to theworld by overachieving because I
thought I wasn't enough.
Had invalidation wounds.
I wasn't enough wounds and allthose things.
Semi-professional athlete wasthe path I went down.
So it was NRL rugby league forAustralian listeners.

(39:48):
I was contracted with theBrisbane Broncos when I was 13
or 14.
And then I was for two or threeyears and then I transferred to
the Titans and I was contractedwith them from 16 to about 18.
And then...
Then when I was 18, I repeatedyear 12.
My school did a three-yearsenior.
So you do 11 and 12 over threeyears just to spread out the

(40:08):
study because I was good atschool and I was good at sports.
So it was a lot.
I was doing like biology,physics, maths B, OP English.
I did a diploma in fitness plustraining three times a day.
So it was like hectic to keep upwith it all.
And I went to get into– I wantedto be a high school teacher and
a personal trainer.
That was my vision back then.
So it's so crazy how it camefrom there.
Then I wanted to get into thefitness industry, got into that,

(40:29):
and it just– that was like the–floodgates opened because i came
down to plc the gym that youpopped down too many years ago
and i started with workexperience i worked for free for
two and a half years and endedup buying into half of plc
burley that was my first studiouh bought into that when i was
20 and then i was very theuninformed optimist back then so

(40:52):
i was just like yes yes yes yesyes yes everything i opened up a
second one at 21 i remember igot the keys to that on my 21st
birthday opened up a board intoa third one when i was 22 so i
had three gyms at 22 built thatup i had 15 team members we're
doing over a million bucks ayear and that's revenue we're
barely profitable because wewere stupid entrepreneurs back
then um then hit a brokenbreaking point i shared in my

(41:14):
book um just phone call justbroke me into tears i collapsed
on the ground just cryingbecause i didn't know i couldn't
see a way out gave one of mybusinesses away i then went
through covid with two gyms thatwas so much fun so that was
hectic um and then i ended upselling plc burley the that you
came down to.
I sold that back to thefranchise.
The franchise went under andthen I had one studio left and
then I hired myself out of it.

(41:35):
So I was earning two to threegrand a week at the age of 24,
25, for one hour of work.
So I had a lot of freedom, notlike a ton of financial freedom,
but I had a lot of time to dowhat I wanted.
And that led me to just godeeper.
And I was always doing a lot ofself-growth.
So I was doing Tony Robbins,masterminds, courses, books,
programs, mentorships.
I was doing a ton of growth inthat same time period.

(41:56):
And I just got a lot deeper onvision, on values, on purpose.
And I just followed thatinspiration.
I followed those breadcrumbs andled me to where I am now.
And I...
Started coaching full-time inthis fashion for about three
years.
I sold my last studio a year.
It was November, not last year,the year before.

(42:17):
So about a year and two, threemonths ago, I sold my last one.
And I've just been doing thisfull-time and I've spent the
first year trying to figure outmy business model because I've
come from a franchise where theypretty much tell you what to do,
where it's like, I don't know.
there's so many options.
Like what, what type of businessI want to build.
So I started saying like, I'vebeen doing one-on-one coaching.
I don't think I'll ever stopdoing that.
I only take on like two, threeclients at a time.

(42:40):
Um, and i've still to this daystill do those i started selling
i did like a weekend onlineevent i did a 10-week challenge
i did an eight-week challenge umthen i started selling
high-ticket courses and like itwas a five thousand dollar
program and i income shotthrough the roof i was making 50
to 100 grand a month off it butthe completion rate of the
course was very low and i didn'tlike that i could have kept

(43:00):
going and made more money but iwanted the impact of it so i
switched over to school so i umI switched over before Homozy
came into it and then Homozycame into it.
I was like, and I was such aHomozy fan because I was
following him in the gym days.
So I was like part of his likegym crew back in the day, his
Facebook group back in the day.
So I switched over from the highticket one-off course to a

(43:21):
reoccurring school communitywith all my, and it's way more
value for money.
It's so much better.
It's like 50 bucks a monthcompared to$5,000 and you get
better content, reoccurringcontent, more support, so much
better.
And last year I wrote a book,Uh, released that last October,
I think, or November.
And yeah, now I'm stepping intoevents.
So I'm just like piecingtogether, like what's, how do I

(43:43):
want to bring my gifts and myimpact to the world?
Um, some people love onlinecourses.
I love online courses.
Some people love books.
I like books.
Some people love events.
I love events.
So I'm trying to touch.
and help people in all ways thatpeople enjoy it.
Because some people won't doevents.
Some people don't do books.
Some people don't do onlineprograms.
So I want to have like,obviously a business that I
enjoy.
For service-based businesses, Ilove simple, fun, highly

(44:07):
profitable.
So I want to sort of keep thatin mind.
But I want to help people in away that's meaningful to me.
And yeah, events is the nextpiece for me for this year.

SPEAKER_00 (44:15):
What was like the pivotal moment for you of change
that you're like, do you knowwhat?
Something's got to...
Something has to change.

SPEAKER_02 (44:23):
There's always like mini moments as well.
So there's a couple that standout.
That phone call when I brokedown, it kind of forced me to,
literally my business partner,he's like, what do you want to
do?
Because we're trying to sell oneof them.
So one of them, we're trying tosell it.
Had a buyer, took us 12 monthsto get the, yes, he's going to
buy it.
So 12 months of like, and I hadthree studios.

(44:44):
I was living off four hours ofsleep.
financially stressedrelationship on the rocks.
I was in a really shit spot andgot a yes after 12 months.
And then there was a cool enoughperiod of like 14 days on like
day 13, he pulls out and thatwas the phone call.
So that was a big, like, what amI going to do?
And I forced me to look withinand do more work.
A bigger one is when I actuallysold the second studio.
So I sold the second studio PLCBurley back to the franchise.

(45:06):
And I still had the other PLC atthe time, the other franchise
gym at the time.
And the franchise was likestarting to go under.
Like I could see a lot of thecracks of like, it wasn't going
to, I'll be surprised if it madeit through.
And the owner of the franchise,he pretty much gave me a really
great opportunity.
He's like, man, do you want tocome and build this up?
Like I started with him earlydays back when I did the work

(45:27):
experience.
It was with him.
So me and him were like bestmates, built it up.
I was pretty early on andhelped, get a lot of the
foundational stuff in place.
Um, and yeah, he just like gaveme an opportunity.
He's like, man, I want you tocome in and help me build out.
Like I'll give you, there'll beheaps of profit there for you.
You can have shares in this.
Like it was a really goodopportunity.
And it's like, I just spentseven years of like doing this

(45:49):
open three salt, um, gave oneaway, sold another one back to
the franchise.
I got one now and I actually,and I'd already hired myself
out.
So I was already, I'm out.
I've got time to then dowhatever.
And I remember I was just likereally conflicted because I had
the friendship part as wellbecause I had a lot of
friendship wounds I hadn'thealed yet.
So it's like, I wanted to goback, but a part of my
intuition, which is thebreadcrumbs, which is like your

(46:11):
intuition is trying to alwayskeep you on path and balanced
and trying to heal you.
It's like that inner voicethat's whispering to you.
And Yeah, I remember it reallyrocked me.
It's like, I originally said Ikind of want to, but I need some
time.
I actually went and did amushroom trip.
So that was, I hired an MBEB andjust took a weekend away and
just did a trip.
And I remember, and it's likefor people that are into

(46:33):
psychedelics, it's like youdon't need them to get the
answers.
It just kind of amplifies it.
But I was just like, I was inthe trip, like the mushrooms
kicked in.
I was just like, what do I do?
And like within two seconds,it's like, you know what you
want to do.
And it's just, so I said no tothat.
So that was a, that was a bigsort of shifting point.
It was like kind of cutting tieswith that.
It's like, I'm no longer goingback into that.
I'm going to go all in on this.
So that was four ish years ago,three and a half, four years

(46:55):
ago.
Um, so that was a big one.
Um, like I said, shifting mybusiness model was great.
Cause it's like, like when Istarted making 1500 grand a
month, I'm like, this is sick.
This is cool.
Um, then change my businessmodel around cause you have a
big dip and then you come backup.
Um, The book was a huge thing.
I remember I did an exercise,really cool exercise.
Oh, I actually found,ironically, I found the piece of
paper to it like two days agobecause I just cleaned up some

(47:18):
of my office.
I did an exercise with Cody, mymentor at the moment.
And you sit down and he says,you've got six months to live.
What do you do?
and that was it and you justhave to start writing what do
you do and the first sentencewas I finally write the book
I've been talking shit about forfive years so because I tried to
write it tried to I attempted towrite it failed I failed to
write it to be honest like threetimes I remember I had like the

(47:41):
first couple of chapters writtenand I just kept kicking the can
down the road go back tobusiness go back to the gyms
whatever and once you've donethe exercise he says pretty much
these are your values thatyou've been procrastinating on

SPEAKER_01 (47:52):
I was like

SPEAKER_02 (47:53):
fuck you and then that was like January like 5th
that moment I like canned all ofmy big goals and said I'm
writing this book and it's likea joke about like if you want
instant gratification don'twrite a book it's like because
like yeah I'm starting to getlike a return on it now I'm
selling about 15 copies a dayall organically and great
reviews and people are readingthe book then coming to work
with me afterwards and but it'slike that that was over 12

(48:14):
months ago like it's January2025 now and I started that
January 2024 so yeah I spent1500 hours writing that bad boy
just myself plus my editor'stime and copywriters all those
things so yeah Yeah, that was abig shift.
So there's a couple of shiftsthere.

SPEAKER_00 (48:29):
What was your biggest lesson that you learned
while writing your book?

SPEAKER_02 (48:34):
Once that stood out is focus.
I literally, like for the ADHDhumans, I literally would sit
down and I'd throw my phone tothis side of the room just so I
don't touch it.
Because it's like you'd hit ablock, a writer's block, and
first thing, distraction.
First thing, distraction.
First thing, distraction.
So focus.
The biggest thing that I gotthat I see a benefit as is just
refining...

(48:55):
how specific you need to be towrite a book so my coaching
ability got so precise so I'vejust felt like I've told coaches
and people that do like sort ofservice-based businesses write a
book without the intention ofselling it just to get the
distilled thoughts down becauseit's like you'll notice the way
I talk I'll go on tangents comeback to this come back to that
and kind of circle back to thecentral point you can't do that

(49:17):
in a book it's like it's agenius knows how to teach more
with less it's like how do youwho actually said this I forget
the person, but it's like, hewrote this letter and it's like,
I apologize for the length ofthis letter.
If I had more time, it would beshorter.
So how do you get your messageacross with the shortest amount
of words possible?

(49:38):
Which is like the opposite of mytalking style, where I like to
share stories and dance aroundand go on tangents.
So, Just being able to force,forcing yourself to sit down and
like, okay, here's like theimpact I want to have.
Here's the lessons I want toteach, values, purpose, vision,
healing, all those things.
What are the examples?
What are the metaphors?
What are the images?
What are the things that I'mgoing to specifically say to get
these lessons across?

(49:58):
So that was phenomenal.
So I really got that.
I just feel like I upgraded mycoaching ability tenfold by
doing that.
That's probably the biggest one.
It's really good for businessnow because it's such a great
lead magnet.
It's just like, hey, look, I'vebeen doing offers.
If you grab a copy of my book,I'll give you a free trial of my
coaching.
I'll give you this.
So it's a great little leadmagnet.
We're starting to play aroundwith funnels for that now.

(50:19):
Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 (50:21):
And it's a great book.
I've got...
I bought it and also listeningto the audio at the moment.
And it's quite practical aswell.
It's like, oh yeah, I canimplement those.
Okay, I can do the questions.
Because I think we live in aworld where there's so much
information and we can listen tothe podcast, we can read the
books, we can do the courses andall the things.
But it's actually like, how do Iapply that to my life right now

(50:41):
and how do I create the change?

SPEAKER_02 (50:43):
Something I'm huge on is that.
It's the mental masturbation.
It's like, I can...
feel motivated from a millionpodcasts, but I'm like, even in
my, I do it in the book and I doit in my community, in my
programs.
It's like, let's teach it, butnow do it.
Let's teach it.
Let's do it.
So I'm running an event in twoweeks and we're doing the
purpose process.
What is purpose?
You become who you need at yourlowest.
It's your core wound, la, la,la.

(51:04):
Let's do the process right now.
And then I'll do limitingbeliefs, trauma triggers, all
those things.
We're doing a limiting beliefprocess right now.
So I'm very big on that because,yeah, I don't want it.
I wanted to, I wanted the bookto be, for people to obviously
impact.
That was the ultimate goal.
It's like if someone neverworked with me again, never saw
my name again, never didanything else with me again,
that book alone will give themtransformation.

(51:24):
So that was my intention goinginto it.
So thank you for the feedback aswell.

SPEAKER_00 (51:27):
What's three tips that you would give someone
that's listening that they canimplement into their life right
now to change it?

SPEAKER_02 (51:34):
Any just general people in general?
Yeah,

SPEAKER_00 (51:37):
let's just go people in general.
Like they're just going, I'mhappy, I'm content, or, you
know, I just need to change.
Yeah.
Yeah, what's three, top threethings?

SPEAKER_02 (51:46):
Top three, my method, so find who you truly
are.
So who's your authentic self?
And for me, I define that asyour values, your purpose, and
mission and vision.
Become conscious of the thingsthat are limiting you and
self-sabotaging you.
Where do you have resistanceemotionally?
Underneath that resistance,there's something for you to
work on.
And learn the skills.

(52:09):
Learn what is it that youactually need to do and
implement and execute on for youto get those things that you
want.
So learn who you are and what itis that you want.
Become aware of the resistance,the triggers, the projections,
the negative resistance in yourlife and address them and then
actually take action.
Do the best of what you have.
Fix the plane as you fly it.
So take the most amount ofamazing action you can in

(52:32):
perfect action.
Take action, do what you canwith what you've got right now
but then continue to improve theplane or fix the plane by
learning more skills, working onyourself more, Yeah, those would
be my top three.

SPEAKER_00 (52:44):
Do you think there's a difference from someone who is
successful and unsuccessful?
Like if there's particulartraits that, do you think
they're traits that they can belearned or do you think that
they're ingrained in who theyare that makes someone
successful and unsuccessful?

SPEAKER_02 (52:59):
Two parts.
It defines success.
I'll go back to that.
So like if someone's likethey're happy as fuck and
they're living a quality of lifethat they're happy with, they're
successful.
So there's the external, likethe art of fulfillment, science
of achievement, So definewhatever your level of success
is, I would say that.
In terms of the traits to getthere, I believe everything is a

(53:19):
skill.
Personally, I believe, I gotthat from Jack DeLosa.
So I believe everything is askill that everyone can learn.
Some people, it's like greatsalespeople, are they natural
born salespeople or is ittaught?
It's both.
It's like people that arenatural born salespeople are
just doing sales skillsnaturally.

(53:39):
They just happen to do itnaturally where you can then
train someone to do the samething.
So what are those said traits?
I'd say consistency.
I'd say resilience.
They're probably my top twobecause I'm going very homosy
with this.
It's just like no...
Know the highest leverageoutcomes that you can focus on,

(54:00):
which are aligned with yourvalues, your purpose, and what
it is that you do.
You're aware of those resistancethings because if you're not
following those actions andyou're not doing the actions,
you know what to do.
You're just not doing it.
That's something within you toaddress.
But having focus, beingconsistent, having resilience,
and being willing to getuncomfortable, those are
probably a couple of traits thatI would suggest people try it

(54:21):
out.

SPEAKER_00 (54:21):
You've dropped Hormozy a few times in the
podcast.
Is he like one of your biggestinspirations or do you have
other people?

SPEAKER_02 (54:28):
The top three I said, Tony Robbins is where I
started.
So he always has a soft spot forTony Robbins.
My number one mentor, if I hadto pick one, would be Demartini.
So Dr.
John Demartini.
Just the way...
His Demartini method shifted me.
So my balancing process, whichis my trauma process, how we
balance those traits and thoseperceptions on the traits, it's

(54:49):
built upon his Demartini method.

SPEAKER_01 (54:51):
So

SPEAKER_02 (54:52):
I'm a Demartini facilitator.
If you have a hammer, everythinglooks like an L.
So there's limitations withevery process.
But from a mental and emotionalperspective, it's fucking
phenomenal.
I think it's better than NLP.
I think it's better thantherapy, traditional therapy,
talk therapy.
I think it's the best.
process on the planet to healmental limitations judgments

(55:15):
resistance quote trauma but theni build upon it so then i add
like three or four differentmodalities into that process to
create my balancing process so dmartini would be number one it'd
probably be homozy who'dprobably be number two i'd
probably put joe dispenser innumber three yeah i love
learning yeah i love i love umbruce lipton i love i Wayne

(55:36):
Dyer.
Top three self-developmentbooks.
Number one is The BreakthroughExperience by Dr.
John Demartini, BecomingSupernatural by Joe Dispenza,
and Change Your Thoughts, ChangeYour Life by Wayne Dyer.
Obviously, he's passed away now.
But I love learning.
I love transformation andhealing.
That's probably my favoritetopic to learn about.
I love business and that's wherethe Homozy stuff comes into it.
Business for me, I'm not, Iwouldn't say, when people say,

(55:58):
what do I do?
I never say I'm an entrepreneur.
I never say I run businesses.
I say I'm a coach.
So that's why the healing stuffinterests me more.
But business is the vehicle forme to give my coaching to the
world.
So a business essentially allowsyou, so it's like you're a pie
maker.
You love making a pie.
I love, I'm the pie maker.
I'm the technician.
I love doing, the coaching part.
So I'm building a business thatallows is a, my business is a

(56:21):
vehicle to give my pie makingskills or my coaching to the
world.
So that's why I quote need to,or want to learn the business
skills.
It's just so I can help morepeople.
And that's, that's why I doenjoy the homosy stuff.

SPEAKER_00 (56:32):
What do you do?
This is just probably a bit of arandom question.
So I know that you're sopassionate and you're so like in
your coaching.
So what do you do outside ofthat for you to just,

SPEAKER_02 (56:41):
what do you think

SPEAKER_00 (56:42):
I do?
Oh, you said games, didn't you?
Yeah, I

SPEAKER_02 (56:46):
thought you'd pick it up.
Yeah, video games.
I've been getting into CODlately, loving COD.
So I was a big nerd growing

SPEAKER_00 (56:51):
up.
I had no idea of games, so thatgoes straight over here.
Call of

SPEAKER_02 (56:54):
Duty, so shooting game.
So top three, I'm a Pokemon fan.
My brother got me Pokemon Crocs,so sometimes I rock those
around.
My partner got us ouranniversary tomorrow for five
years.
She got me Pokemon undies.
I'm not sure how to think aboutthose.
I've only worn them once.
I like the intention.
I like the thought, but yeah,I'm not sure about those ones.

(57:15):
But yeah, I'm a big nerd deepdown.
So I love games.
I love anime.
So top three games in my careerwould be Pokemon when I was
younger.
Holy, I spent thousands of hourson my Game Boy.
So I love Pokemon.
Mario, just the whole Mariofucking ecosystem.
Love Mario Kart, Mario Party.
Yeah, love Mario.

(57:37):
And then Call of Duty would bein there.
That's the current one.
I kind of go through stages ofgames.
And other games too, like RugbyLeague.
I don't play that anymore.
I've just hit my knee too manytimes over that.
So over the injuries.
But I love table tennis.
Any ball games I love and videogames.
And board games.
So ball as in sporting games.
We've been playing Scattergorieslately.
Have you played that?

(57:57):
So fun.
I need like an affiliate code.
It's so fun.
It's essentially you get a...
You get...
There's like these cards ofdifferent questions or
categories.
Yeah.
And everyone has the same card.
So you've got, I think, on eachis 15 or 12.
It'll be like things you find ona university campus, things that

(58:18):
are loud, things that smell,things where you can buy food
from.
And then you've got a dice andyou roll the dice and it come up
with a letter on the dice.
And you've got three minutes toget an answer for each of the
things.
But if anyone has the sameanswer as you, you don't get a
point for it.
So you're a bit more unique.
So it's like a thinking game,but you've been binging on that
lately.
Monopoly Deal, we love Monopoly.
We play that a lot.

(58:38):
So yeah, I love a good game.
So games would be me.

SPEAKER_00 (58:42):
Have you tried pickleball?

SPEAKER_02 (58:44):
I love tennis and table tennis.
I'm open to it.
I haven't played it yet.
So I think I would love it.
I've played squash before, soI've definitely got the similar
sports.
So I think I would enjoy it.
I just haven't...
Anyone in my circles hasn't doneit.

SPEAKER_00 (58:59):
Well...
We tried it the other night.
Fun.
And yeah, so much fun becauseit's like a real mix of all of
that.
And I love tennis and tabletennis as well.
And I think we're going to getlike a little social group
together.
Oh, fuck yeah.
I'm in.

SPEAKER_02 (59:11):
I'm very competitive

SPEAKER_00 (59:12):
too.
I know it does bring out yourcompetitive streak because like
you play nice and then you'rejust like...
When you

SPEAKER_02 (59:17):
start, when the points are counted, when you're
like, let's play a game, let'skeep score, that's when like
dial in.
So yeah.
So gaming...

SPEAKER_00 (59:25):
Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 (59:26):
Board games, ball games, video games.
That's kind of me outside ofwork.

SPEAKER_00 (59:30):
Yeah, that's awesome.
What question were you hopingthat I would ask today that I
didn't ask?

SPEAKER_02 (59:35):
That's a good question.
You kind of covered it.
I like healing.
I love purpose.
I love business.
So you kind of danced around allof them.
I don't have a specificquestion.
What did I not ask?
I spoke about the book.
You kind of covered all thethings I like talking about,
so...

(59:55):
I don't have anything.
That's awesome.
Good feedback.

SPEAKER_00 (59:57):
Well, thank you so much for your time.
I really appreciate it.
And I know that we could go onso many different like rabbit
holes with all of this stuff.
So I appreciate you kind oftouching on everything.
And yeah, the book, I love it.
So yeah, it's a great book.
So if you want to startsomewhere, that's a good place
to start as well.

SPEAKER_02 (01:00:13):
Thank you.
Pleasure.
I appreciate what you're doing.
I know we've bumped into eachother so many times.
It's inevitable.
And I love that you're on amission to spread more
consciousness, awareness.
And yeah, I look forward toseeing where you go with this
and taking this to the world.

SPEAKER_00 (01:00:25):
Perfect thank you.
Thank you.