Not Yet: My Journey Through Loss and Finding Myself Again

In this raw and deeply personal episode, recorded on May 23, 2025, I share the devastating story of losing my infant son on May 23, 2017. It started as an ordinary night, but when I went to bed, I found a small puddle of blood and discovered my son limp in my ex-husband’s arms. Panic took over as I screamed for my mom to call the police, sat against the wall chanting “not yet,” and followed the ambulance to the hospital, where doctors told me he was gone. I recount the isolating aftermath—paying for my son’s ashes, facing an empty memorial, and burying my grief to care for my other kids. Eight years later, I’m still grappling with guilt, shame, and the loss of my identity as a mother. With raw honesty, I explore how I’m learning to embrace happiness without guilt, honor my son, Infinite, and rediscover who I am. This episode is for anyone navigating loss, offering hope and resilience through shared pain.

Hey, it’s Danielle To You from I’m Talkin to You, I’m Talkin to Me Too! I’m so excited to hear from y’all with our new fan mail! No names needed, just your truth. My stories are heavy with pain but bright with possibility. What episode moved you or changed your view? Tell me how it felt