August 16, 2025 • 29 mins
Offers dramatic narratives that delve into human emotions and experiences, each story crafted to resonate with listeners on a personal level.
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Speaker 1 (00:08):
Kathy and Elliott Lewis on stage. Katty Lewis Elliott Lewis,
two of the most distinguished names in radio, appearing each
week in their own theater, starring in a repertory of
(00:31):
transcribed stories of their own. And you're choosing radio's foremost
players and radio's foremost plays. Drama, comedy, adventure, mystery, melodrama,
Ladies and gentlemen. Mister Elliott Lewis, good evening, May I
(00:51):
present my wife Jack Good Evening. A thief and his
money are soon parted. What is there a misquote? It
should be a fool, But I want to explain something
about tonight's story.
Speaker 2 (01:03):
Which is called Dig the Thief and is about a
man named John Digby played by you.
Speaker 1 (01:09):
And his adventures in the state of New Mexico with
a lovely girl named Cecily played by you.
Speaker 2 (01:15):
The script was written by Morton Sein and David Freakin,
and as a matter of fact, there are several thieves involved.
Speaker 1 (01:22):
I'm not the only one.
Speaker 2 (01:23):
But to find that out, we Dig the Thief.
Speaker 1 (01:41):
Oh oh, oh, oh, well there it is. There's the
town spread out like she is like a little jewel
in the valley. Can I say something atter? Digby, it's allowed.
Speaker 3 (02:00):
All the tona is looking so pretty, full of moon
and all I love a love people sleeping peaceful.
Speaker 1 (02:07):
Ain't gonna last long?
Speaker 2 (02:08):
Is it?
Speaker 1 (02:09):
Long as I've been hanging around the ranch? Mister Digby,
we never had a chivalry like this. Ah you sure something? Well?
Good to have you bored? Did Jamison girl?
Speaker 2 (02:18):
Okay, I'm right here beside you, mister Digby. I'm fine
riding the way you said, posting the way you said.
You know it works out real night.
Speaker 1 (02:25):
Well pass the word back. Get ready, I get ready, get.
Speaker 2 (02:28):
Ready, get ready, you get ready.
Speaker 4 (02:33):
I'll sat, mister Digby, I'll set then all right, let's go,
(02:57):
ah man, you.
Speaker 1 (03:06):
Me uh to me, me.
Speaker 5 (03:23):
Spream and the board all right on him.
Speaker 1 (03:45):
I've hosted there for you. You can get out, go home,
you can get back to the ranch, and you, dig Me,
you can drop dead. What'll I do? I didn't do anything.
You've been chewing local weeks, dig Me? What are they?
You take a bunch of guests from a dude ranch?
You chew up? It's a town of otis. What do
you use blacks? Mister Conell? You to I told you
to take the guests for a moonlight ride. I told
(04:06):
you no hanky panky, dig be he specifically, I told you,
I remember saying it, haggern Card. You were leaning up
against the corral fins, chopping on a straw and covering
up the turb and I told you yet no, Yeah,
now I remember. Uh, mister Cornell, you're fired. Mister Conwell,
when you hired me to take charge of guest relations,
you said I could have a free reign. You impressed
(04:28):
me with the importance of recreating the Old West. I
also old you no hanky panky. Well, that's the kind
of ombre you are not i'd heard. Okay, mister Conel.
Three days I worked for you, fifteen dollars a day,
he means, join me five. Your bar was fifty.
Speaker 6 (04:44):
Well, we'll pay for him. Wiltie Feller, No sure, sure
what you're always.
Speaker 2 (04:49):
So sleepy, mister Southgate. We are taking a collection for
Digby five dollars.
Speaker 1 (04:54):
Oh well, I'll pass the words. We're taking. Oh, here's
five bucks. It was worth it. You happy now, mus Codels,
get out of here, dig Me, get back to the ranch,
get your gear and get.
Speaker 5 (05:16):
As I was walking the speed, some lout radio.
Speaker 1 (05:31):
Hey, Hey, how about a lift. Hey are you.
Speaker 6 (05:35):
A uh hey, hey, you going my way?
Speaker 1 (05:52):
As in the riot? You got your get inna sit
up front of me? A fine? Ah no, what begin
to think this ride would never come? I'm sorry I
was a little late leaving the house, he ended. Uh uh,
(06:15):
ask you a question. Sure what tribe you come from?
Apache left the reservation last year? House tricks can't complain.
What are you doing now?
Speaker 3 (06:26):
You know?
Speaker 1 (06:28):
Yeah, you know, took up a trade at the reservation school,
or how to drive a Cadillac? Got a job? All
the boys are doing that now, all the boys still
wearing the long braids like you. I'll have mister Ramsey's
idea for local color. You know how mister Ramsey is.
Mister Ramsey, Uh how he is? Oh? Well, sure, sure
(06:49):
glad I caught you. Else mister Ramsey would have well,
you know, oh we had your biting butts. Eh, let's
say nh uh you got a cigarette if you like
work too? Yeah? Sure here that's Oh, mister Ramsey's sure
(07:10):
gonna be glad to see you. Just walk right up
there into the house. You're expected. Thanks a lot, cheafie,
(07:32):
get along with thank you, Haldie. Oh Hali, please come in.
Speaker 2 (08:05):
I'm Cicely Ramsey.
Speaker 1 (08:06):
Uh, of course. Uh, how's mister Ramsey?
Speaker 2 (08:09):
Fine, Dad and I just came in from a gallop.
He's tethering the horses.
Speaker 1 (08:13):
Uh, Dad's tethering 'em.
Speaker 2 (08:15):
He never let anyone else do it.
Speaker 1 (08:18):
Well, well, what, well, I hope I'm not interrupting anything.
Speaker 2 (08:23):
Oh no, no, oh.
Speaker 1 (08:26):
What's the matter Why he's staring at me?
Speaker 2 (08:28):
I'm sorry, you're not the type, that's all. Oh, please
don't do that. It scuffs the rug Yuh sorry, No,
you're not the type at all.
Speaker 1 (08:38):
Well, I've had the virus some of who.
Speaker 2 (08:41):
Goes around digging in tombs like you do?
Speaker 1 (08:44):
What? Uh?
Speaker 2 (08:45):
I guess it's silly of me, miss Johnny Wall, but
I expected someone to. Uh Dusty was a pis helman. No,
don't do that the rug.
Speaker 1 (08:56):
No, I'm sorry.
Speaker 2 (08:58):
You're the most bashful archaeologian.
Speaker 1 (09:00):
Oh uh, well, we we don't come up very often.
That's why all the sunlight. Uh whew.
Speaker 2 (09:08):
Must be very interesting work though. Oh my yes, digging
up artifacts.
Speaker 1 (09:14):
Well that's the best part. Uh.
Speaker 2 (09:16):
You and Dennis will get along just fine. Dennis, my
fancy daddy wrote you about him.
Speaker 1 (09:22):
Sure. Oh oh that Dennis yeah, Dennis. I can hardly
wait to meet him. Is he here?
Speaker 2 (09:29):
He's flying in?
Speaker 1 (09:30):
Dennis is flying in?
Speaker 2 (09:32):
Is he as soon as he heard?
Speaker 1 (09:33):
Oh about the pot? Oh, of course he'll.
Speaker 2 (09:37):
Be here the first thing in the morning. You too
will get along.
Speaker 3 (09:41):
Wa.
Speaker 2 (09:41):
Well, he's he's so very interesting like you.
Speaker 1 (09:44):
Oh well, sure that's because he's in archaeology. Sure.
Speaker 2 (09:48):
Oh yeah, he's just a student. He's at Harvard, you know,
majoring in archaeology. But he's having such a difficult time.
You know, this is the second time he's repeating Assyrian
tombs one.
Speaker 1 (09:59):
Well, no wonder, that's the hardest part.
Speaker 2 (10:02):
Oh, royal in here. Look he's here, daddy.
Speaker 1 (10:09):
Well, hello, young man, howdy good, very good, your honeywell,
aren't you.
Speaker 2 (10:17):
I've made arrangements that mister Honeywell take the spare suite
in the west wing.
Speaker 1 (10:20):
Good, very good. Now, uh you run along, Sesaly. Mister
Honeywell and I have a lot to talk about.
Speaker 2 (10:25):
We were having such an interesting conversation. Isn't he the
youngest darkiologist ever? It was such a reputation.
Speaker 1 (10:33):
Yep. Uh, don't do that to the rug. Honeywell. Sorry,
run along, sessily. You'll see mister honeywell, and dinners honeywell, bye,
ma'am whoa honeywell? Let me take a look at you, Yes, sir,
cert indeed, sir, you do. You'll do fine? Now, Uh look,
(10:53):
mister Ramsey, my time's pretty valuable. There's digging to be done.
You'll do? You do fine? Yes, sir? Yes, archaeologists come high,
expensive education supplies, pith helmets and all. I wrote you
in the letter ten percent, didn't I ten percent? Well, yeah,
I just dropped in to day to tell you wasn't enough.
(11:13):
All the way from Chicago, I was passing by anyhow,
on my way to Pultepec, the Inca country. You know. Okay,
make it fifteen percent. Well that's a lot better. Come on,
I'll show it to you this way, I'll bet you. Eh. Well,
(11:33):
what have you got to say? I hardly know? I
thought so stunners, aren't they all? Three? Have you ever
seen better examples of prehistoric Indian pottery in your life? Hardly? Ever?
Those pots are four or five thousand years old, wouldn't
you say? Ooh, give a little, take a little without
a crack? Well, I really build them in those days.
(11:56):
I think we can get ten grand apiece for them. Yeah, uh,
ten grand sounds fair, especially since the ceiling's off. Huh
uh uh? Which one do you like? Who cares? Oh?
That middle one is my favorite? Black buffaloes too. Who's he? Who?
The Indian boy that made him four or five thousand
years ago last Thursday? Now, remember my daughter thinks they're yours.
(12:19):
You shipped him a head. That's the story in case
anyone asks you might if I ask you a question,
mister Ramsey, well, how else you gonna know who's going
to give you ten thousand apiece for last Thursday's pots?
Have you ever heard of Harvard boy Dennis, your daughter's fiance,
loaded boy, and I'm the archaeologist who's gonna tell him
(12:41):
they're worth ten thousand? He worships you? Why that boy
rocks himself to sleep reading or pat pipathies? Pots are phony?
They foods? You didn't they any well? Or flash judgment?
I didn't put the calipers on them or even uh
e phony? Yeah, well, these Harvard boys haven't got your ear.
And Dennis is loaded a four million and he ain't
(13:03):
reel bright. He collects old crocs sill. He's my intended
son in law. I shouldn't speak too harshly. He's a
fine boy, great swimmer, always swims underwater, remarkable, and you're
going to swindle him out of thirty thousand dollars. We
are you and me for twenty percent. I am listen you.
I found out about you. You have You've got a
(13:25):
good reputation, but you haven't got two shovels to rub
to get take it or leave it. I'll take it fine. Well,
what times did it? Sir mister Ramsey? You are listening
(13:47):
to Kathy and Elliott Lewis on stage tonight's play Dig
the Thief in your town, in the next town across
the nation, you will find the Red Cross. But the
Red Cross is above and beyond all boundary lines, for
it is infinite in its scope. In time of hardships, epidemics, floods, fires,
the Red Cross is the symbol and soul of humanity.
(14:07):
You are part of that symbol because it is the
money you contribute that enables the Red Cross to continue
its great work. Answer the call, and humanity will answer
you with gratitude. Hey with Cecily, Hi, Hi, Hi, good
(14:35):
morning morning. What are you doing out here so early?
Speaker 2 (14:38):
Scanning the horizon? Where Hey plays the whole horizons for Dennis.
He's arriving this morning. He flies, you know, oh, his
own plane. He'd be furious if he knew I was
scanning for it. Oh, he doesn't like people have watched
swims a lot underwater.
Speaker 1 (14:53):
You know. Well, things like that you have to respect
with Cecily. Why don't we just take a walk, work
up an appetite for breakfast. Just see the haze on the gorse,
you know. Walk.
Speaker 2 (15:03):
I'd love to, But uh huh, what should we talk about?
Speaker 1 (15:09):
Pick a subject?
Speaker 2 (15:10):
Atioch who Patioch Jans was telling me about the remarkable
work you did there. Most are so fascinating working in
those old excavations.
Speaker 1 (15:20):
Yure, Well, there's no excavation like an old excavation.
Speaker 2 (15:24):
Dennis always says that too.
Speaker 1 (15:26):
Well, he must have read it in one of my pamphlets.
Speaker 2 (15:29):
That was the title of one of your pamples. Don't
you remember it?
Speaker 1 (15:32):
Or of you? Necessily. Let's not talk about old ruins.
Let's talk about you.
Speaker 2 (15:36):
Why I'm really nothing?
Speaker 1 (15:38):
No, no, I I must tell you something that's amazing, and
perhaps you won't believe it, but it's true. When I
dug up the sarcophagus of a wondrous and beautiful Egyptian princess. No, uh,
don't walk, stay here. I I really must tell you
about it all right on her tomb was painted, her
portrait unbelievably beautiful, with a serenity almost got its slightly.
(15:59):
The first time I saw you, I said to myself,
Princess or Cyrus of the Seventh Moon, you are wade.
Speaker 2 (16:07):
What let's take off our moccasins and wade.
Speaker 1 (16:09):
Yeah, that's just what I've been trying to say, necessily,
Let's take off our moccasins and wade. Yeah. I haven't
had a cold foot bath before breakfast since Antiyok, you better.
Speaker 2 (16:22):
Hold my hands to honey, thank you? Yet, this is
this wonderful Dennis ever goes in here with me?
Speaker 1 (16:30):
But you love him anyhow, don't you very much? Why?
Speaker 2 (16:34):
He's sweet, he's charming and and really he's only bashful
when other people are around. When Dennis and I.
Speaker 1 (16:41):
Are a lot, But don't tell me about it.
Speaker 2 (16:43):
He's a very gentle boy. It's all that's daddy.
Speaker 1 (16:47):
Yes, I know here we are, Daddy. What how did
he get you in that street?
Speaker 2 (16:56):
Cecily was my idea?
Speaker 1 (16:57):
Daddy, what's the matter get your shoes on, Honeywell, and
come with me. You want to try this, mister Ramsey,
I was just telling your daughter when I was an abbey.
I heard what I said, get your shoes on. Something's happened,
mister Honeywell. You still haven't told me. What's the matter,
mister Ramsey in here in the library, Oh you know,
(17:27):
allow me to introduce myself. I'm mister Honeywell. Oh no,
you're not well the heck I'm not. I am Honeywell
the archaeologist. Oh no, you're not sure I am. You
just asked mister Ramsey here. Oh no, you're not two
against one. Huh? All right? Who am I? Who are
you eliminate? Honeywell? I'm Honeywell. I asked you a question.
(17:49):
Who are you? Your chauffeur said I was Honeywell. Your
daughter said I was Honeywell. You said I was Honeywell.
Now I'm confused. My chauffer was supposed to pick up
mister Honeywell in front of that dude ranch yesterday. He
picked you up, so we all fought you were Honeywell.
How dare this young man has so Honeywell? Yes, how
dare you assume mister Honeywell's identity. You assumed it for me, Ramsey.
(18:11):
Let's not turn blue over a mistake you made.
Speaker 7 (18:12):
I must say, mister Ramsey, the whole thing is your
Schoffer's fault, just because I arrived at the Dud's ranch
a few hours later.
Speaker 1 (18:19):
Yes, now you what's your real name? Digby? Johnny Digby
and your Honeywell, the dishonest archaeologist. I won't be called dishonest.
Your profession's robbing graves, isn't it? Thirty old babes? Nobody
wants them anyhow? All I can say is you fellows
that got yourselves in a vine here. You are gonna
cheat Dennis out of thirty thousand dollars. Boy mm hmm,
(18:41):
stop at the kitchen and have the cook picture a
real chuck wagon lunch. Then blow a real big vine
and his fifty dollars for your trump. That all right
with you, mister Honeywell. I don't care if I never
see you again, sir, But think what would happen to
your reputation if I went out and spread it around
among your buddies of the shovel You were party to
a fraud that you verified that last Thursday's pots were
(19:05):
old in the relics. How about that? How much the honeyway? Hi?
Speaker 7 (19:09):
Ready must call Hey, Now wait a minute, this young
man is perfectly right, and I listen, Honeyway.
Speaker 1 (19:14):
We had a deal. Those pots in the closet were
supposed to be your pots. Dennis would take your word
for us that they're authentic. Ten thousand dollars apiece. You
can't run out on me, nily, mister Ramsey, really what really?
I must go? Hello, mister Ramsey, Hello, mister Honeywell, name
(19:34):
is Digbie, Johnny Digby. A flat fee a thousand dollars?
Oh listen and now come here to the window. Plane overhead,
get away from the window. Dennis don't like anybody to
watch it. Dennis, don't huh? Where were you saying? Ramsey?
(19:54):
A flat fee one thousand? Last night? You offered me
twenty percent of thirty thousand dollars I offered, doctor Honeywell,
who am I? How are you? Mister Honeywell? Very well,
thank you, I'm just fine. I'll take six thousand dollars.
Please a loud question. I write your check. Please do
make it out to John Digby. Hey you are boy Ramsey. Yes,
(20:23):
you signed Honeywell's name to the check I did. Sounds
like Dennis's plane is coming in for a landing, Ramsey.
I'd hate to disillusion Dennis about his future father in law.
You better write me another check. But you're the biggest
seat from the state of New Mexican. You write the check,
sign your name, than call your chauffeur. I want to
get to the bank and cash this check before I
say hello's to Dennis. As a matter of fact, to
the whole Southwest. Write the check, Ramsey put her there.
(20:53):
I'm so sorry I wasn't able to meet you at
the plane, Dennis, but.
Speaker 3 (20:56):
I had to stop at the bank. Mister Honeywell. Oh yes,
mister honeywey oh yes, geez, you don't mention it.
Speaker 1 (21:06):
Oh I must your last paper, the one on the
Ptolemies of eg Yes, it had a certain style in this.
Speaker 3 (21:12):
The way you just looked at that sand dune in
the middle of the Sahara and then made an X
on the sands and said dig here.
Speaker 1 (21:20):
Oh that was the most everybody messed everybody else. Oh well,
from mister Ramsey.
Speaker 3 (21:28):
My intended father in law dad to be my boy
when he wrote that you would be here expressly.
Speaker 1 (21:35):
To meet me. Oh well, well, what didn't it?
Speaker 3 (21:37):
And when mister Ramsey, my intended father in law yet
to be, of course, when he told me that he
was interceding in my behalf and that the pots could
be bought for only thirty thousand dollars.
Speaker 1 (21:49):
Or Dad to be drives a hard bargain. Of course,
you know I would have paid twice that much, mister Honeywell,
may I see you for a minute before Well, if
Dennis feels the old pots are under priced, we don't
wanna take advantage of for that's no, no, no, no, no,
my pleasure. I know they'll be in good hands.
Speaker 2 (22:08):
We're gonna have a place in New York, and we've
got a spot in the living room for them.
Speaker 1 (22:12):
A niche cicely a nich.
Speaker 2 (22:14):
Oh, Denny's been keeping them from me. I haven't seen
them yet.
Speaker 1 (22:18):
Well, Dennis, I.
Speaker 3 (22:21):
I guess now's as good a time as any.
Speaker 1 (22:22):
Hell, let's take a look Ramsey right uh this way
next door to the sun room, mister Honeywell, and I
need a display. Well, Dennis, my boy, what do you think?
Speaker 2 (22:39):
Oh my, oh, Dennis, they're in love.
Speaker 1 (22:44):
You feel that quality? Dennis? Oh my oh, wait on
my friends at Harvard Cedre. We keep them away from
the hasty pudding boys. And only thirty thousand dollars. I
feel like a thief if you've forgotten your check book. Boy.
Oh no, I brought along a certified check for thirty
thousand dollars, of course, made out to mister Honeywell. Oh good,
(23:07):
here and thank you, thank you so much. You're white. Welcome, Honeywell,
what are you doing?
Speaker 2 (23:16):
Dennis?
Speaker 1 (23:17):
He drew up the check. Oh, it was too good
to be true. Dennis, will pay you any price. These
two kids have got to fiddle their niches. Honeywell, Dennis, Yes, sir,
will you go forty thousand? Yes, sir Honeywell, forty thousand?
Take it or leave it. Cecily, I hate you, Oh
I don't hate you. What do you want, Cecily? I
(23:39):
think you're one of the loveliest young ladies I've ever met.
Speaker 2 (23:41):
How much do you want, mister Honeywell?
Speaker 1 (23:43):
Nothing?
Speaker 2 (23:43):
Oh no, I don't understand you.
Speaker 3 (23:46):
I don't understand him either, cessor all the trouble he
went through digging out these perfect they're yours, a wedding
present from me to you.
Speaker 1 (23:56):
Oh, I can't accept them. Well, of course you can't.
I'm going to be your father or no, And I
say you can't accept them. It's it's impossible, Cecily.
Speaker 2 (24:05):
You're a very sweet man.
Speaker 1 (24:07):
I want you to have them.
Speaker 2 (24:09):
Yeah, i'd like to kiss you. Mister Honeywell, I wish
you would.
Speaker 1 (24:15):
Oh, thank you, bless you both, my children.
Speaker 2 (24:20):
This has been the most touching day of our lives,
hasn't it been?
Speaker 3 (24:23):
Dennis, mister Honeywell, yes, Dennis, you're a very superior man.
Speaker 1 (24:38):
Is I was walking the streets a movie, you know, Hey,
how about a lift? Uh huh? Hop in? Yeah, hey
give me way ahead of Texas? Nice place, Texas.
Speaker 8 (25:00):
I used to think so, but maybe I ain't gonna
like it anymore. Got a couple of hundred acres north Amilla.
Used to be peaceful there, I gonna be peaceful no more.
Speaker 1 (25:08):
Oh what's the matter?
Speaker 8 (25:10):
Wife called me this morning in Albuquerque where I was
selling some hogs.
Speaker 1 (25:14):
Wife says the hog drought back in Texas is running oil.
H Yeah, I know hogs, but I don't know oil.
I know oil. Who are you headed for? Amarilla? Do tell? Hey?
Uh y, you wouldn't consider I might if the deal
was right. Yes, cigarette. If you roll your own only way,
I smoke 'em. Thank you.
Speaker 8 (25:36):
I like a man rolls his own signed honesty.
Speaker 6 (25:41):
We ain't gonna have any.
Speaker 1 (25:42):
Troubles, none at all. Dig The Thief, starring Kathy and
Elliott Lewis in a moment, mister and missus, Lewis won't
tell you about that. Next week's play. Colleges preoccupy two
(26:03):
of our leading programs this weekend on CBS Radio, The
Von Monroe Show will originate in Boston College, with Vaughn
and Company serving up the top tunes of this week.
To mark the occasion, Gangbusters approaches learning from another tangent,
bringing us its true crime case history, The College Caper.
Also Saturday night on most of these same stations, The
Geneaufrey Show brings us its Western drama called The Ruthless Rustler.
(26:26):
And Tarzan Lord of the Jungle introduces us to the
dreaded Lionmen in an episode titled Tarzan and the Arena
of Death. And now once again Kathy and Elliott.
Speaker 2 (26:35):
Lewis, what did you do when you got to Texas?
Speaker 1 (26:44):
Well, maybe in about six months, I'll tell you if
Morton Fine and David Friedkin can be prevailed upon to
continue the adventures of dig the.
Speaker 2 (26:52):
Thief tonight while in New Mexico, John Digby was shrewder
than my father, John McIntyre, my fiance Lee Millar, and
the legitimate archaeologist Hal Gerard.
Speaker 1 (27:03):
While the same mister Digby got fired earlier in the
play by Ken Christie because he shot up a town
with the help of G. G. Pearson, Byron Kine and
Bob Sweeney, who was a writer a few weeks ago.
Speaker 2 (27:13):
Next week, we're going to do a new adaptation of
a story you all know about, but if you're at
all like Elliott and me, don't remember very well. In
its original form.
Speaker 1 (27:22):
It was written by Frank Stockton, and it's called The
Lady or the Tiger.
Speaker 2 (27:27):
We'll be with you next week. Until then, thank you
for listening, and good night, good night.
Speaker 1 (27:46):
Music for Tonight's story was composed by Fred Steiner and
conducted by lud Gluskins. The Kathy and Elliott theme is
by Ray Noble, and the program is transcribed and directed
by mister Lewis. George Wall Streakings, mm HM and Remember
(28:07):
for Music and Song joined bon Row Saturday nights on
the CBS Radio Network
Kathy and Elliott Lewis on stage. Katty Lewis Elliott Lewis,
two of the most distinguished names in radio, appearing each
week in their own theater, starring in a repertory of
(00:31):
transcribed stories of their own. And you're choosing radio's foremost
players and radio's foremost plays. Drama, comedy, adventure, mystery, melodrama,
Ladies and gentlemen. Mister Elliott Lewis, good evening, May I
(00:51):
present my wife Jack Good Evening. A thief and his
money are soon parted. What is there a misquote? It
should be a fool, But I want to explain something
about tonight's story.
Speaker 2 (01:03):
Which is called Dig the Thief and is about a
man named John Digby played by you.
Speaker 1 (01:09):
And his adventures in the state of New Mexico with
a lovely girl named Cecily played by you.
Speaker 2 (01:15):
The script was written by Morton Sein and David Freakin,
and as a matter of fact, there are several thieves involved.
Speaker 1 (01:22):
I'm not the only one.
Speaker 2 (01:23):
But to find that out, we Dig the Thief.
Speaker 1 (01:41):
Oh oh, oh, oh, well there it is. There's the
town spread out like she is like a little jewel
in the valley. Can I say something atter? Digby, it's allowed.
Speaker 3 (02:00):
All the tona is looking so pretty, full of moon
and all I love a love people sleeping peaceful.
Speaker 1 (02:07):
Ain't gonna last long?
Speaker 2 (02:08):
Is it?
Speaker 1 (02:09):
Long as I've been hanging around the ranch? Mister Digby,
we never had a chivalry like this. Ah you sure something? Well?
Good to have you bored? Did Jamison girl?
Speaker 2 (02:18):
Okay, I'm right here beside you, mister Digby. I'm fine
riding the way you said, posting the way you said.
You know it works out real night.
Speaker 1 (02:25):
Well pass the word back. Get ready, I get ready, get.
Speaker 2 (02:28):
Ready, get ready, you get ready.
Speaker 4 (02:33):
I'll sat, mister Digby, I'll set then all right, let's go,
(02:57):
ah man, you.
Speaker 1 (03:06):
Me uh to me, me.
Speaker 5 (03:23):
Spream and the board all right on him.
Speaker 1 (03:45):
I've hosted there for you. You can get out, go home,
you can get back to the ranch, and you, dig Me,
you can drop dead. What'll I do? I didn't do anything.
You've been chewing local weeks, dig Me? What are they?
You take a bunch of guests from a dude ranch?
You chew up? It's a town of otis. What do
you use blacks? Mister Conell? You to I told you
to take the guests for a moonlight ride. I told
(04:06):
you no hanky panky, dig be he specifically, I told you,
I remember saying it, haggern Card. You were leaning up
against the corral fins, chopping on a straw and covering
up the turb and I told you yet no, Yeah,
now I remember. Uh, mister Cornell, you're fired. Mister Conwell,
when you hired me to take charge of guest relations,
you said I could have a free reign. You impressed
(04:28):
me with the importance of recreating the Old West. I
also old you no hanky panky. Well, that's the kind
of ombre you are not i'd heard. Okay, mister Conel.
Three days I worked for you, fifteen dollars a day,
he means, join me five. Your bar was fifty.
Speaker 6 (04:44):
Well, we'll pay for him. Wiltie Feller, No sure, sure
what you're always.
Speaker 2 (04:49):
So sleepy, mister Southgate. We are taking a collection for
Digby five dollars.
Speaker 1 (04:54):
Oh well, I'll pass the words. We're taking. Oh, here's
five bucks. It was worth it. You happy now, mus Codels,
get out of here, dig Me, get back to the ranch,
get your gear and get.
Speaker 5 (05:16):
As I was walking the speed, some lout radio.
Speaker 1 (05:31):
Hey, Hey, how about a lift. Hey are you.
Speaker 6 (05:35):
A uh hey, hey, you going my way?
Speaker 1 (05:52):
As in the riot? You got your get inna sit
up front of me? A fine? Ah no, what begin
to think this ride would never come? I'm sorry I
was a little late leaving the house, he ended. Uh uh,
(06:15):
ask you a question. Sure what tribe you come from?
Apache left the reservation last year? House tricks can't complain.
What are you doing now?
Speaker 3 (06:26):
You know?
Speaker 1 (06:28):
Yeah, you know, took up a trade at the reservation school,
or how to drive a Cadillac? Got a job? All
the boys are doing that now, all the boys still
wearing the long braids like you. I'll have mister Ramsey's
idea for local color. You know how mister Ramsey is.
Mister Ramsey, Uh how he is? Oh? Well, sure, sure
(06:49):
glad I caught you. Else mister Ramsey would have well,
you know, oh we had your biting butts. Eh, let's
say nh uh you got a cigarette if you like
work too? Yeah? Sure here that's Oh, mister Ramsey's sure
(07:10):
gonna be glad to see you. Just walk right up
there into the house. You're expected. Thanks a lot, cheafie,
(07:32):
get along with thank you, Haldie. Oh Hali, please come in.
Speaker 2 (08:05):
I'm Cicely Ramsey.
Speaker 1 (08:06):
Uh, of course. Uh, how's mister Ramsey?
Speaker 2 (08:09):
Fine, Dad and I just came in from a gallop.
He's tethering the horses.
Speaker 1 (08:13):
Uh, Dad's tethering 'em.
Speaker 2 (08:15):
He never let anyone else do it.
Speaker 1 (08:18):
Well, well, what, well, I hope I'm not interrupting anything.
Speaker 2 (08:23):
Oh no, no, oh.
Speaker 1 (08:26):
What's the matter Why he's staring at me?
Speaker 2 (08:28):
I'm sorry, you're not the type, that's all. Oh, please
don't do that. It scuffs the rug Yuh sorry, No,
you're not the type at all.
Speaker 1 (08:38):
Well, I've had the virus some of who.
Speaker 2 (08:41):
Goes around digging in tombs like you do?
Speaker 1 (08:44):
What? Uh?
Speaker 2 (08:45):
I guess it's silly of me, miss Johnny Wall, but
I expected someone to. Uh Dusty was a pis helman. No,
don't do that the rug.
Speaker 1 (08:56):
No, I'm sorry.
Speaker 2 (08:58):
You're the most bashful archaeologian.
Speaker 1 (09:00):
Oh uh, well, we we don't come up very often.
That's why all the sunlight. Uh whew.
Speaker 2 (09:08):
Must be very interesting work though. Oh my yes, digging
up artifacts.
Speaker 1 (09:14):
Well that's the best part. Uh.
Speaker 2 (09:16):
You and Dennis will get along just fine. Dennis, my
fancy daddy wrote you about him.
Speaker 1 (09:22):
Sure. Oh oh that Dennis yeah, Dennis. I can hardly
wait to meet him. Is he here?
Speaker 2 (09:29):
He's flying in?
Speaker 1 (09:30):
Dennis is flying in?
Speaker 2 (09:32):
Is he as soon as he heard?
Speaker 1 (09:33):
Oh about the pot? Oh, of course he'll.
Speaker 2 (09:37):
Be here the first thing in the morning. You too
will get along.
Speaker 3 (09:41):
Wa.
Speaker 2 (09:41):
Well, he's he's so very interesting like you.
Speaker 1 (09:44):
Oh well, sure that's because he's in archaeology. Sure.
Speaker 2 (09:48):
Oh yeah, he's just a student. He's at Harvard, you know,
majoring in archaeology. But he's having such a difficult time.
You know, this is the second time he's repeating Assyrian
tombs one.
Speaker 1 (09:59):
Well, no wonder, that's the hardest part.
Speaker 2 (10:02):
Oh, royal in here. Look he's here, daddy.
Speaker 1 (10:09):
Well, hello, young man, howdy good, very good, your honeywell,
aren't you.
Speaker 2 (10:17):
I've made arrangements that mister Honeywell take the spare suite
in the west wing.
Speaker 1 (10:20):
Good, very good. Now, uh you run along, Sesaly. Mister
Honeywell and I have a lot to talk about.
Speaker 2 (10:25):
We were having such an interesting conversation. Isn't he the
youngest darkiologist ever? It was such a reputation.
Speaker 1 (10:33):
Yep. Uh, don't do that to the rug. Honeywell. Sorry,
run along, sessily. You'll see mister honeywell, and dinners honeywell, bye,
ma'am whoa honeywell? Let me take a look at you, Yes, sir,
cert indeed, sir, you do. You'll do fine? Now, Uh look,
(10:53):
mister Ramsey, my time's pretty valuable. There's digging to be done.
You'll do? You do fine? Yes, sir? Yes, archaeologists come high,
expensive education supplies, pith helmets and all. I wrote you
in the letter ten percent, didn't I ten percent? Well, yeah,
I just dropped in to day to tell you wasn't enough.
(11:13):
All the way from Chicago, I was passing by anyhow,
on my way to Pultepec, the Inca country. You know. Okay,
make it fifteen percent. Well that's a lot better. Come on,
I'll show it to you this way, I'll bet you. Eh. Well,
(11:33):
what have you got to say? I hardly know? I
thought so stunners, aren't they all? Three? Have you ever
seen better examples of prehistoric Indian pottery in your life? Hardly? Ever?
Those pots are four or five thousand years old, wouldn't
you say? Ooh, give a little, take a little without
a crack? Well, I really build them in those days.
(11:56):
I think we can get ten grand apiece for them. Yeah, uh,
ten grand sounds fair, especially since the ceiling's off. Huh
uh uh? Which one do you like? Who cares? Oh?
That middle one is my favorite? Black buffaloes too. Who's he? Who?
The Indian boy that made him four or five thousand
years ago last Thursday? Now, remember my daughter thinks they're yours.
(12:19):
You shipped him a head. That's the story in case
anyone asks you might if I ask you a question,
mister Ramsey, well, how else you gonna know who's going
to give you ten thousand apiece for last Thursday's pots?
Have you ever heard of Harvard boy Dennis, your daughter's fiance,
loaded boy, and I'm the archaeologist who's gonna tell him
(12:41):
they're worth ten thousand? He worships you? Why that boy
rocks himself to sleep reading or pat pipathies? Pots are phony?
They foods? You didn't they any well? Or flash judgment?
I didn't put the calipers on them or even uh
e phony? Yeah, well, these Harvard boys haven't got your ear.
And Dennis is loaded a four million and he ain't
(13:03):
reel bright. He collects old crocs sill. He's my intended
son in law. I shouldn't speak too harshly. He's a
fine boy, great swimmer, always swims underwater, remarkable, and you're
going to swindle him out of thirty thousand dollars. We
are you and me for twenty percent. I am listen you.
I found out about you. You have You've got a
(13:25):
good reputation, but you haven't got two shovels to rub
to get take it or leave it. I'll take it fine. Well,
what times did it? Sir mister Ramsey? You are listening
(13:47):
to Kathy and Elliott Lewis on stage tonight's play Dig
the Thief in your town, in the next town across
the nation, you will find the Red Cross. But the
Red Cross is above and beyond all boundary lines, for
it is infinite in its scope. In time of hardships, epidemics, floods, fires,
the Red Cross is the symbol and soul of humanity.
(14:07):
You are part of that symbol because it is the
money you contribute that enables the Red Cross to continue
its great work. Answer the call, and humanity will answer
you with gratitude. Hey with Cecily, Hi, Hi, Hi, good
(14:35):
morning morning. What are you doing out here so early?
Speaker 2 (14:38):
Scanning the horizon? Where Hey plays the whole horizons for Dennis.
He's arriving this morning. He flies, you know, oh, his
own plane. He'd be furious if he knew I was
scanning for it. Oh, he doesn't like people have watched
swims a lot underwater.
Speaker 1 (14:53):
You know. Well, things like that you have to respect
with Cecily. Why don't we just take a walk, work
up an appetite for breakfast. Just see the haze on the gorse,
you know. Walk.
Speaker 2 (15:03):
I'd love to, But uh huh, what should we talk about?
Speaker 1 (15:09):
Pick a subject?
Speaker 2 (15:10):
Atioch who Patioch Jans was telling me about the remarkable
work you did there. Most are so fascinating working in
those old excavations.
Speaker 1 (15:20):
Yure, Well, there's no excavation like an old excavation.
Speaker 2 (15:24):
Dennis always says that too.
Speaker 1 (15:26):
Well, he must have read it in one of my pamphlets.
Speaker 2 (15:29):
That was the title of one of your pamples. Don't
you remember it?
Speaker 1 (15:32):
Or of you? Necessily. Let's not talk about old ruins.
Let's talk about you.
Speaker 2 (15:36):
Why I'm really nothing?
Speaker 1 (15:38):
No, no, I I must tell you something that's amazing, and
perhaps you won't believe it, but it's true. When I
dug up the sarcophagus of a wondrous and beautiful Egyptian princess. No, uh,
don't walk, stay here. I I really must tell you
about it all right on her tomb was painted, her
portrait unbelievably beautiful, with a serenity almost got its slightly.
(15:59):
The first time I saw you, I said to myself,
Princess or Cyrus of the Seventh Moon, you are wade.
Speaker 2 (16:07):
What let's take off our moccasins and wade.
Speaker 1 (16:09):
Yeah, that's just what I've been trying to say, necessily,
Let's take off our moccasins and wade. Yeah. I haven't
had a cold foot bath before breakfast since Antiyok, you better.
Speaker 2 (16:22):
Hold my hands to honey, thank you? Yet, this is
this wonderful Dennis ever goes in here with me?
Speaker 1 (16:30):
But you love him anyhow, don't you very much? Why?
Speaker 2 (16:34):
He's sweet, he's charming and and really he's only bashful
when other people are around. When Dennis and I.
Speaker 1 (16:41):
Are a lot, But don't tell me about it.
Speaker 2 (16:43):
He's a very gentle boy. It's all that's daddy.
Speaker 1 (16:47):
Yes, I know here we are, Daddy. What how did
he get you in that street?
Speaker 2 (16:56):
Cecily was my idea?
Speaker 1 (16:57):
Daddy, what's the matter get your shoes on, Honeywell, and
come with me. You want to try this, mister Ramsey,
I was just telling your daughter when I was an abbey.
I heard what I said, get your shoes on. Something's happened,
mister Honeywell. You still haven't told me. What's the matter,
mister Ramsey in here in the library, Oh you know,
(17:27):
allow me to introduce myself. I'm mister Honeywell. Oh no,
you're not well the heck I'm not. I am Honeywell
the archaeologist. Oh no, you're not sure I am. You
just asked mister Ramsey here. Oh no, you're not two
against one. Huh? All right? Who am I? Who are
you eliminate? Honeywell? I'm Honeywell. I asked you a question.
(17:49):
Who are you? Your chauffeur said I was Honeywell. Your
daughter said I was Honeywell. You said I was Honeywell.
Now I'm confused. My chauffer was supposed to pick up
mister Honeywell in front of that dude ranch yesterday. He
picked you up, so we all fought you were Honeywell.
How dare this young man has so Honeywell? Yes, how
dare you assume mister Honeywell's identity. You assumed it for me, Ramsey.
(18:11):
Let's not turn blue over a mistake you made.
Speaker 7 (18:12):
I must say, mister Ramsey, the whole thing is your
Schoffer's fault, just because I arrived at the Dud's ranch
a few hours later.
Speaker 1 (18:19):
Yes, now you what's your real name? Digby? Johnny Digby
and your Honeywell, the dishonest archaeologist. I won't be called dishonest.
Your profession's robbing graves, isn't it? Thirty old babes? Nobody
wants them anyhow? All I can say is you fellows
that got yourselves in a vine here. You are gonna
cheat Dennis out of thirty thousand dollars. Boy mm hmm,
(18:41):
stop at the kitchen and have the cook picture a
real chuck wagon lunch. Then blow a real big vine
and his fifty dollars for your trump. That all right
with you, mister Honeywell. I don't care if I never
see you again, sir, But think what would happen to
your reputation if I went out and spread it around
among your buddies of the shovel You were party to
a fraud that you verified that last Thursday's pots were
(19:05):
old in the relics. How about that? How much the honeyway? Hi?
Speaker 7 (19:09):
Ready must call Hey, Now wait a minute, this young
man is perfectly right, and I listen, Honeyway.
Speaker 1 (19:14):
We had a deal. Those pots in the closet were
supposed to be your pots. Dennis would take your word
for us that they're authentic. Ten thousand dollars apiece. You
can't run out on me, nily, mister Ramsey, really what really?
I must go? Hello, mister Ramsey, Hello, mister Honeywell, name
(19:34):
is Digbie, Johnny Digby. A flat fee a thousand dollars?
Oh listen and now come here to the window. Plane overhead,
get away from the window. Dennis don't like anybody to
watch it. Dennis, don't huh? Where were you saying? Ramsey?
(19:54):
A flat fee one thousand? Last night? You offered me
twenty percent of thirty thousand dollars I offered, doctor Honeywell,
who am I? How are you? Mister Honeywell? Very well,
thank you, I'm just fine. I'll take six thousand dollars.
Please a loud question. I write your check. Please do
make it out to John Digby. Hey you are boy Ramsey. Yes,
(20:23):
you signed Honeywell's name to the check I did. Sounds
like Dennis's plane is coming in for a landing, Ramsey.
I'd hate to disillusion Dennis about his future father in law.
You better write me another check. But you're the biggest
seat from the state of New Mexican. You write the check,
sign your name, than call your chauffeur. I want to
get to the bank and cash this check before I
say hello's to Dennis. As a matter of fact, to
the whole Southwest. Write the check, Ramsey put her there.
(20:53):
I'm so sorry I wasn't able to meet you at
the plane, Dennis, but.
Speaker 3 (20:56):
I had to stop at the bank. Mister Honeywell. Oh yes,
mister honeywey oh yes, geez, you don't mention it.
Speaker 1 (21:06):
Oh I must your last paper, the one on the
Ptolemies of eg Yes, it had a certain style in this.
Speaker 3 (21:12):
The way you just looked at that sand dune in
the middle of the Sahara and then made an X
on the sands and said dig here.
Speaker 1 (21:20):
Oh that was the most everybody messed everybody else. Oh well,
from mister Ramsey.
Speaker 3 (21:28):
My intended father in law dad to be my boy
when he wrote that you would be here expressly.
Speaker 1 (21:35):
To meet me. Oh well, well, what didn't it?
Speaker 3 (21:37):
And when mister Ramsey, my intended father in law yet
to be, of course, when he told me that he
was interceding in my behalf and that the pots could
be bought for only thirty thousand dollars.
Speaker 1 (21:49):
Or Dad to be drives a hard bargain. Of course,
you know I would have paid twice that much, mister Honeywell,
may I see you for a minute before Well, if
Dennis feels the old pots are under priced, we don't
wanna take advantage of for that's no, no, no, no, no,
my pleasure. I know they'll be in good hands.
Speaker 2 (22:08):
We're gonna have a place in New York, and we've
got a spot in the living room for them.
Speaker 1 (22:12):
A niche cicely a nich.
Speaker 2 (22:14):
Oh, Denny's been keeping them from me. I haven't seen
them yet.
Speaker 1 (22:18):
Well, Dennis, I.
Speaker 3 (22:21):
I guess now's as good a time as any.
Speaker 1 (22:22):
Hell, let's take a look Ramsey right uh this way
next door to the sun room, mister Honeywell, and I
need a display. Well, Dennis, my boy, what do you think?
Speaker 2 (22:39):
Oh my, oh, Dennis, they're in love.
Speaker 1 (22:44):
You feel that quality? Dennis? Oh my oh, wait on
my friends at Harvard Cedre. We keep them away from
the hasty pudding boys. And only thirty thousand dollars. I
feel like a thief if you've forgotten your check book. Boy.
Oh no, I brought along a certified check for thirty
thousand dollars, of course, made out to mister Honeywell. Oh good,
(23:07):
here and thank you, thank you so much. You're white. Welcome, Honeywell,
what are you doing?
Speaker 2 (23:16):
Dennis?
Speaker 1 (23:17):
He drew up the check. Oh, it was too good
to be true. Dennis, will pay you any price. These
two kids have got to fiddle their niches. Honeywell, Dennis, Yes, sir,
will you go forty thousand? Yes, sir Honeywell, forty thousand?
Take it or leave it. Cecily, I hate you, Oh
I don't hate you. What do you want, Cecily? I
(23:39):
think you're one of the loveliest young ladies I've ever met.
Speaker 2 (23:41):
How much do you want, mister Honeywell?
Speaker 1 (23:43):
Nothing?
Speaker 2 (23:43):
Oh no, I don't understand you.
Speaker 3 (23:46):
I don't understand him either, cessor all the trouble he
went through digging out these perfect they're yours, a wedding
present from me to you.
Speaker 1 (23:56):
Oh, I can't accept them. Well, of course you can't.
I'm going to be your father or no, And I
say you can't accept them. It's it's impossible, Cecily.
Speaker 2 (24:05):
You're a very sweet man.
Speaker 1 (24:07):
I want you to have them.
Speaker 2 (24:09):
Yeah, i'd like to kiss you. Mister Honeywell, I wish
you would.
Speaker 1 (24:15):
Oh, thank you, bless you both, my children.
Speaker 2 (24:20):
This has been the most touching day of our lives,
hasn't it been?
Speaker 3 (24:23):
Dennis, mister Honeywell, yes, Dennis, you're a very superior man.
Speaker 1 (24:38):
Is I was walking the streets a movie, you know, Hey,
how about a lift? Uh huh? Hop in? Yeah, hey
give me way ahead of Texas? Nice place, Texas.
Speaker 8 (25:00):
I used to think so, but maybe I ain't gonna
like it anymore. Got a couple of hundred acres north Amilla.
Used to be peaceful there, I gonna be peaceful no more.
Speaker 1 (25:08):
Oh what's the matter?
Speaker 8 (25:10):
Wife called me this morning in Albuquerque where I was
selling some hogs.
Speaker 1 (25:14):
Wife says the hog drought back in Texas is running oil.
H Yeah, I know hogs, but I don't know oil.
I know oil. Who are you headed for? Amarilla? Do tell? Hey?
Uh y, you wouldn't consider I might if the deal
was right. Yes, cigarette. If you roll your own only way,
I smoke 'em. Thank you.
Speaker 8 (25:36):
I like a man rolls his own signed honesty.
Speaker 6 (25:41):
We ain't gonna have any.
Speaker 1 (25:42):
Troubles, none at all. Dig The Thief, starring Kathy and
Elliott Lewis in a moment, mister and missus, Lewis won't
tell you about that. Next week's play. Colleges preoccupy two
(26:03):
of our leading programs this weekend on CBS Radio, The
Von Monroe Show will originate in Boston College, with Vaughn
and Company serving up the top tunes of this week.
To mark the occasion, Gangbusters approaches learning from another tangent,
bringing us its true crime case history, The College Caper.
Also Saturday night on most of these same stations, The
Geneaufrey Show brings us its Western drama called The Ruthless Rustler.
(26:26):
And Tarzan Lord of the Jungle introduces us to the
dreaded Lionmen in an episode titled Tarzan and the Arena
of Death. And now once again Kathy and Elliott.
Speaker 2 (26:35):
Lewis, what did you do when you got to Texas?
Speaker 1 (26:44):
Well, maybe in about six months, I'll tell you if
Morton Fine and David Friedkin can be prevailed upon to
continue the adventures of dig the.
Speaker 2 (26:52):
Thief tonight while in New Mexico, John Digby was shrewder
than my father, John McIntyre, my fiance Lee Millar, and
the legitimate archaeologist Hal Gerard.
Speaker 1 (27:03):
While the same mister Digby got fired earlier in the
play by Ken Christie because he shot up a town
with the help of G. G. Pearson, Byron Kine and
Bob Sweeney, who was a writer a few weeks ago.
Speaker 2 (27:13):
Next week, we're going to do a new adaptation of
a story you all know about, but if you're at
all like Elliott and me, don't remember very well. In
its original form.
Speaker 1 (27:22):
It was written by Frank Stockton, and it's called The
Lady or the Tiger.
Speaker 2 (27:27):
We'll be with you next week. Until then, thank you
for listening, and good night, good night.
Speaker 1 (27:46):
Music for Tonight's story was composed by Fred Steiner and
conducted by lud Gluskins. The Kathy and Elliott theme is
by Ray Noble, and the program is transcribed and directed
by mister Lewis. George Wall Streakings, mm HM and Remember
(28:07):
for Music and Song joined bon Row Saturday nights on
the CBS Radio Network
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