May 6, 2025 • 48 mins
In this episode of Faith Over Fear: The Christian Pregnancy & Birth Podcast, I’m sharing the full story of my second birth—Daniel’s peaceful home birth—and how it stretched my faith, challenged my need for control, and ultimately led me to experience more joy and surrender than I thought possible.
This pregnancy and birth journey was different from my first. After delivering my daughter unmedicated in a hospital, I found myself being called toward a new kind of birth experience. But that shift came with fear, hesitation, and daily moments of surrender—especially after walking through another miscarriage scare and months of intense early labor symptoms.
Whether you’re considering a home birth, wrestling with “what if” scenarios, or simply needing a fresh reminder that God is with you in your birth story—this episode is full of encouragement for your heart, mind, and spirit.
In this episode, I share:
- 🌸 How we decided to switch from hospital care to planning a home birth
- 🩺 Navigating another miscarriage scare and trusting God’s provision for our pregnancy
- 🎶 How worship music and prayer helped me through labor’s most intense moments
- ✝️ The mindset shifts that helped me surrender fear and embrace faithful preparation
- 👶 Sweet, unexpected moments that made Daniel’s birth even more joyful than I imagined
Scripture Shared:
"When a woman is giving birth, she has sorrow because her hour has come, but when she has delivered the baby, she no longer remembers the anguish, for joy that a human being has been born into the world." – John 16:21 (ESV)
A Prayer for You:
I close this episode by praying over you—especially if you’re carrying fear, uncertainty, or heavy hopes into your pregnancy or birth journey. May you be reminded that God is near, His timing is perfect, and His joy is waiting on the other side of surrender.
Mentioned in this episode:
- ✨ Christian Mama Birth Prep Library: Free birth prep tools, worship playlists & more
- 💛 Work with Me 1:1 – Doula Support & Coaching: Explore birth support and childbirth education for your pregnancy and birth journey
If this episode encouraged you, please subscribe, leave a review, and share it with a friend. Let’s keep choosing faith over fear, one birth story at a time.
Go here for the full blog post, show notes, and all resources mentioned!
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Natalie Portman (00:01):
Welcome to Faith Over Fear, the Christian
Pregnancy and Birth podcast.
I'm Natalie Portman, a wife,mama, birth doula and childbirth
educator.
And I believe God has a betterway for us to experience birth
one without fear, striving, orself-glorification.
If you're ready to stop feelingoverwhelmed and instead trust
(00:23):
the Lord more deeply inpregnancy.
Birth and motherhood.
You're in the right place here.
You'll find inspiring birthstories, biblical encouragement,
and practical wisdom to help youwalk in faith over fear during
this beautiful and challengingseason.
Now let's get started.
(00:46):
Well, hello there and welcome toepisode two where I'll be
sharing the birth story of myson, Daniel.
He's my second born.
And just the growth thathappened from that experience,
preparing for that birth, havinga different birth experience.
I had a hospital birth withEllie and deciding to go with a
(01:07):
home birth with Daniel was ahuge decision.
And one that we were reallyhappy we made, but a lot went
into that also.
It's funny because I became adoula after I had Ellie, and so
going into this birth with theknowledge and the experience
that I had after.
Being a doula for a couple yearsat that point, had some pros and
(01:29):
certainly some cons, whichagain, I'll go into more detail
about.
So with Ellie's pregnancy anddelivery, six weeks after I had
her, I went in for my OB visitand had an IUD put in at that
point.
And I did not have a period whenI had the IUD and so was in the
(01:50):
same boat.
As when we were trying to getpregnant, the first time was I
had no idea when I wasovulating, and so I did the same
thing again.
I used ovulation test strips.
I was checking my basal bodytemperature where you like take
your temperature first thing inthe morning, like before you get
out of bed.
And what's really cool is thisapp that I used had the test
(02:13):
strips and the basal body temp,which was a Bluetooth
temperature.
Monitor and so it would, I wouldtake my temperature and it would
log it inside of the app.
I'll put that Bluetooth monitorthe test strips in the app, in
the show notes so you know whichone I used.
But yeah, it was relativelyinexpensive but just helped us
like figure out when I mighthave a chance to actually
(02:35):
conceiving.
So that was really great to havethat information.
So we started trying for a babyin April of 2023.
We actually were at a weddingand we realized when we were on
that trip, like I was in theairport about to leave and
realized like, oh my goodness,I'm about to ovulate and I
(02:57):
getting pregnant the first time.
Thought, oh, for sure I'm gonnaget pregnant this time.
And so the time came and went.
Whenever I could start testingto see if I was pregnant.
It was not showing up that I waspregnant, and I was like, okay,
I just need to give it a couplemore days.
I just know I'm pregnant.
I was like feeling like I hadconceived.
I just felt some crampiness andthen come to find out I did not
(03:20):
get pregnant that time and I wasreally disappointed because I
just felt like I was doubting mybody that some, maybe something
was wrong.
Or I just felt foolish because Ihad misunderstood some of my
body's cues, thinking maybe Iwas pregnant.
So that was reallydisappointing, and I ended up
(03:41):
the next month, so that wasApril.
So then in May I was like, Ijust need to separate myself for
a bit, thinking about how thisultimately is not in my control,
but I really just wanted toposture my heart to be.
Just ready for whatever timingthe Lord had for us because I
(04:02):
just assumed that oh A plus Bequal CI find out when I'm
ovulating, we have sex, and ofcourse that's gonna mean I, I
get pregnant and I just, Ididn't trust the Lord at that
point and just really wasoperating out of a control and
fear place.
And so that next month we didn'ttry, I wasn't tracking.
(04:24):
I can't remember if I wastracking.
I just think I just needed tostep away from that.
And then come June, I tracked itand realized when that timeframe
would be.
We celebrated Ellie's secondbirthday earlier that month,
June 9th, and then I think itwas like a week or something
later is whenever I wasovulating.
And sure enough come like end ofJune, I found out that I was
(04:47):
pregnant.
And so again, very blessed, verythankful that we were able to
get pregnant on our second try.
Even though there was a couplemonths removed there, but I it
revealed in my heart how much Isay that I trust the Lord say
how I just, I want his will andall the things.
But there was still that controland that fear and that ickiness
(05:11):
in my heart that I really diddeep down feel like I could
control things that are out ofmy control.
So that was a rude awakening,but it did just make that time
when we did find out we werepregnant, just the gratitude and
the thankfulness that it didn'ttake very long for us to get
pregnant again.
And then what's so funny is atthat point, being a doula, I had
(05:34):
already decided who I was goingto reach out to about doula
support, and that's Kaylajourney.
And if you are in theJacksonville area, you probably
have heard of Kayla.
She is an incredible birth doulaand she and I actually later
started a birth doula collectivewhere we work together and
support each other's clients incase something crazy happens
(05:56):
where we have two clients inlabor at the same time or coming
off of a really long birth, andthen another client goes into
labor.
So we back each other up.
We keep in close communicationfor just support and just
getting through being a birthdoula.
It's a really intense role attimes, but having Kayla is such
(06:17):
a blessing.
But yeah, she knew like the dayafter I found out that I was
pregnant, I called her and said,Hey, what are you doing in March
of 2024?
Would you like to be my doula?
And she was of course happy tosay yes to that.
So it's obviously most peopledon't even realize they're
pregnant that early on, letalone hire a doula.
(06:38):
When you have a really gooddoula, you gotta book them
really quickly'cause they fillup fast.
But yeah, so Kayla is my doulaand crazy enough, I had another
miscarriage scare with thispregnancy.
I talked about that with Ellie'sand how we came to realize it
was a subchorionic hematoma.
And we suspect that same thinghappened again with this
(07:01):
pregnancy, although in some waysI, I was more prepared, but in
others, I just couldn't believethat it was happening again and
was like, surely this is amiscarriage.
Like the cramping that I had wasso bad, it was like causing me
to weep.
Like they were so bad.
The cramping and the.
(07:22):
Bleeding I had, I was passingsmall blood clots whenever I was
having that with this pregnancy,and that was terrifying.
Long story short, I had alreadystarted establishing care with a
local OB midwife practice herein Jacksonville called Full
Circle Women's Care.
They are phenomenal and they hadme do blood work to just see
(07:46):
what my levels, like the HCGhormones.
To see what was going on there.
And thankfully things weretrending normally where that
hormone was increasing at alevel that was leaning more
towards a healthy normalpregnancy.
(08:06):
And so that was amazing just toget that reassurance.
But there was still like acouple weeks where we were not
sure entirely what washappening.
But because I had that previousexperience, they were pretty
confident that everything wasokay.
I also went in and had anultrasound to just rule out like
(08:27):
ectopic pregnancy, making surethat the baby was growing
actually inside the uterus andnot in the fallopian tubes.
And so that ultrasound was veryreassuring that everything was
also normal there.
So that was just a scary, bumpystart.
But again, the Lord was justnear to us during that time, and
(08:47):
I really did have such a peaceabout it, even if it meant that
this pregnancy was not gonna beviable.
I really trusted the Lord in hisplan for whatever was happening.
So around the time of theanatomy scan, we had started
talking.
Brian and I had started talkingabout possibly shifting to a
(09:09):
home birth with a home birthmidwife.
And I had resolved at that pointthat I wanted to at least get
through the anatomy scan with myOB midwife practice.
And as long as things were stilllooking normal and healthy at
that point, switch to home birthcare.
(09:32):
So I had the anatomy scan, Ithink right at 20 weeks.
Everything looked good with babyand me.
The only thing that was ofconcern was I had a low lying
placenta, and the problem with alow lying placenta is if it
doesn't resolve where theplacenta moves away from the
cervix, like that opening wherebaby has to come through, then
(09:54):
the only option for delivery isa cesarean.
And thankfully, it's a very highpercentage of.
Placenta that move up and out ofthe way.
And so by the grace of God itdid.
And so that was, that ended upnot being an issue, but it was
definitely on my radar that Ihad to keep in mind as we
(10:16):
factored in the pros and cons ofpotentially going with a home
birth.
And there was just a lot thatwent into that.
I literally made pros and conslist.
I was regularly just like goingto the Lord in prayer about it.
Brian and I had manyconversations about it because
we had to consider the financialcost, the just the logistical
(10:38):
things and just there.
There were just so many factorsat play, but we did ultimately
decide to move forward with ahome birth midwife.
Her name is Rebecca Ray withSweet Grace Midwifery.
She's so precious and we, shehad home visits, so all of my
prenatal visits, I think she hasit a little bit differently now
(10:59):
that she has an office, but shewould come to my home and do the
prenatal visits there, which wasso great having a another child
where I would just have Rebeccacome during her naps, Ellie's
nap time, and it was so greatbecause I didn't have to.
Schedule a separate time to beaway or do anything.
(11:22):
It was just a quiet time in thehouse and Rebecca would come and
take care of me.
So that was really great.
And then I also forgot tomention earlier in the
pregnancy, started having to dovery regular chiropractic
adjustments, like from the verybeginning, like even five weeks
pregnant, which again, like somewomen don't even know they're
(11:42):
pregnant at that point.
But I, having that hypermobilityjust realized how much my body
began just shifting and startingto have a lot of pelvic pain
very early on, and so that wassuch a help Going to the
chiropractor.
(12:02):
My chiropractor, her name isPaige.
Paige is no longer practicing inJacksonville.
She moved to be with family, butshe is Webster certified.
And that Webster technique isspecifically geared towards
adjusting pregnant women, and itwas such a help.
(12:23):
I honestly don't think I couldhave survived without her
regular adjustments.
I think I started out going likeonce or twice a month in the
beginning, and then I startedgoing every other week, and then
I started going weekly, and thenI think at the very end I was
going once or twice a week, butthat was a huge help.
Then leading up to the time thatI actually delivered, like
(12:49):
starting at 35 weeks, that lastmonth, I was already feeling so
much pressure, like it almostfelt like a bowling ball just
sitting between my legs.
And I had Rebecca check me atthat point.
'cause I was just like, what ishappening?
I feel so much pressure already.
So at one of my appointments, Ihad her do a cervical check just
(13:11):
to see what was happeningbecause I was already having a
ton of contractions allthroughout that pregnancy.
I started losing my mucus plugkind of early, was having the
backache, having the nestingurge, and so I was like, I
wonder if this is changing mycervix at all.
And so I did have her check me.
And I was already a little bitdilated and starting to like
(13:34):
ripen and soften, but she wasalso noting that he was already
like very much engaged in mypelvis, which also explained why
I was starting to feel so muchpressure and I was doing all of
the cervical ripening methods,drinking red raspberry leaf tea,
eating dates, doing theacupuncture, eating spicy foods.
Having sex, like all of thosethings.
(13:55):
I was doing those, but becauseDaniel was already engaged in my
pelvis at 35 weeks, I steppedback just a little bit because I
did not want to go into laborearly.
And I forgot to mention this aswell.
If you are doing a home birth,you have to meet certain
criteria.
You have to be considered lowrisk enough to be under the care
(14:15):
of a home birth midwife.
If you or baby becomes high riskat any point in the pregnancy,
like even if it's like the veryend or like the start of labor
or during labor, then you haveto switch back into the care of
an OB or head to the hospital.
And that was a mental block forme because I had a very low
(14:38):
risk, easy pregnancy with Ellie.
For the most part was alsohaving a very straightforward,
low risk pregnancy with Daniel,but because of the amount of
contractions I was havingalready at 30 something weeks
already, him being engaged inthe pelvis.
I worried that at any pointsomething could change and I
(15:01):
would become high risk, or Iwould go into preterm labor.
I even had an instance where Ithought maybe my water had
broken because I was just havingso much vaginal fluid that I
thought, oh my gosh, did mywater break?
And that was a complicatingfactor throughout the pregnancy
that I did not worry about withmy hospital birth with Ellie.
(15:23):
Because I, first of all, again,didn't have the birth experience
that I had with Daniel'spregnancy where I had seen some
moms transfer from home birthsetting to hospital birth due to
high risk factors or otherthings.
And I also kept worrying thatsomething would pop up for me
(15:44):
personally.
That would disqualify me fromhaving the home birth that I was
really dreaming of or just otherjust scary things happening.
And that was something that theLord really had to work through
me and I felt like I had toconstantly, like literally
constantly surrender my plansfor my birth to the Lord.
(16:08):
It was.
Almost a daily exercise that Iwould have to think about.
This sounds negative, but Iwould have to think about, okay,
well what if the worst casescenario happens?
What if I become high risk andneed to find an OB and be under
their care?
Is that gonna be okay?
(16:29):
And I would have to talk myselfdown and just be like, and
Natalie, that would be okay ifthat happened, you would still
be okay.
Would you be sad that you arenot having the home birth you
want?
Absolutely.
And I'm allowed to feel sadabout that or even scarier.
Worst case scenarios.
What if I do end up having thehome birth and we need to
(16:50):
transfer to the hospital at somepoint in the labor?
Is that gonna be okay?
Are you okay with that?
And just trying to think throughworst case scenarios.
Not in a, trying to scare myselfway, but just to push myself
into thinking through my.
Perceived worst case scenariosand thinking it out, and it
(17:12):
still just being okay and havinga plan for that.
If that does end up happening,and that's something that I
would recommend that you do aswell, is just bringing all of
that to the Lord as you'repraying through that, talking
through that with your husband,talking through that with
friends, talking through thatwith your doula if you have a
doula because.
(17:34):
I think so much of birth ismental.
I mentioned this in the firstepisode that so much of birth is
a physical, obviously challengeand journey, but so much of it
is spiritual and mental.
I think we do ourselves adisservice when we don't take
care of our mindset as weprepare for the pregnancy, the
(17:57):
birth, the postpartum time.
When we don't consider thechallenge that's ahead in the
mental aspect, we set ourselvesup for failure, and so I say
hope for the best, plan for thebest.
But you also need to be preparedfor the worst case scenario, and
I think it's a good exercisebecause it does just help you
(18:19):
shake off that lingering anxietyabout things that could happen,
things that might happen,instead of it just always
feeling like it's in thebackground or the back burner of
all of these things that mighthappen that you're just too
afraid to even engage with.
That's my tip there.
So again, going back to thestory, so I stopped doing some
(18:42):
of the cervical ripening methodsjust so that my body could stop
progressing and hopefully staypregnant for another couple
weeks.
So Rebecca was able to care forme.
If I went into labor at 37 weeksand on, if I went into labor
before that 37 week mark, Iwould've needed to go to a
(19:03):
hospital and my baby there.
So I held off for that time.
My due date was March 7th, andon March 1st, Rebecca came over
for my prenatal visit and I hadher check me again, and I was
two centimeters dilated, 75% aface, and baby boy was already
(19:25):
really low.
Zero station.
I asked her to do a membranesweep at that point because
again, I was having so much ofthat warmup contractions, losing
more of the mucus plug, thebackache, all the things, and I
just was like, I want my body tojust finally get over this hump.
The other thing I forgot tomention was I did do
(19:45):
acupuncture, a couple rounds ofacupuncture, I think that week
prior, because once I was 37weeks, I started back up doing
all the things.
So this was like about a weeklater.
Rebecca was doing this check andso I asked her to do a membrane
sweep and at that point she alsowas able to stretch me to four
centimeters.
'cause the cervix was likereally stretchy.
After that membrane sweep, I hadlots of cramping, a little bit
(20:10):
of bleeding, which that's alllike very normal.
I.
I could just tell that theBraxton Hicks that I had been
having started increasing andit, they weren't very regular,
like they were very sporadic,but I could just tell that
things were starting to justincrease in intensity and so
that night I was craving Mexicanfood, so we ordered in some
(20:32):
Mexican and also thought, okay,cool, like spicy food will help
too.
Had my Mexican food.
And ended up like going andtaking an Epsom salt bath
because I was starting to justhave more regular contractions.
They were very mild.
It wasn't like I was needing tobreathe through them or
anything, but I could just tellthat they were picking up.
And so I called my mom and mysisters and I just said, I'm
(20:55):
starting to experience thesecontractions.
I don't know if it's worth youguys coming over at some point,
or maybe even just spending thenight in case I go into labor in
the middle of the night.
Kinda left it up to them, butthey all decided to come over,
which I felt like was a reallyfun excuse for a sleepover.
And so my mom slept in our guestbedroom and my sisters ended up
(21:17):
sleeping out in our living roomon the couch, and so they stayed
the night.
This is embarrassing, but I toldBrian, I was like, okay, we are
having sex tonight because Ijust need this baby to come.
So we had sex, which also helpsstimulate contractions, semen
helps get the cervix to ripenand dilate and all the things.
(21:39):
So we had sex that night.
I think we went to bed around 10ish, which is late for me.
Like I am an old lady and I loveto go to bed like at eight
o'clock or nine o'clock.
I'm so old.
So that was a late night for us.
But we also, like I said, hadfamily staying with us and I was
like out there with my sisterschatting and whatnot.
Finally went to bed around 10o'clock and then around midnight
(22:00):
I woke up and started feelingjust very regular, powerful
contractions.
And I tell my clients all thetime, if you go into labor at
night, which most women do, ifyou go into labor at night, I
want you to try and ignore thosecontractions until you just
simply cannot ignore themanymore.
That's what I told myself.
(22:21):
And so I kept trying to just goback to sleep, lay down, change
positions, do whatever, but theywere definitely coming pretty
regularly and powerfully at thatpoint, I could not sleep.
So I started timing them aroundlike a little bit after
midnight, and they were comingpretty regularly.
So I sent screenshots to Kaylaand I'm like, okay, like I'm a
(22:42):
doula, like I should know this,but do you think I'm in labor?
Like it was very confusing.
And so that was just anotherbenefit of having a doula.
Even though I am a doula wasjust to kinda get that outside
perspective because it's almostlike you can't see the forest
through the trees when it'shappening to you.
Like you're feeling so manysensations that it was just nice
to have somebody definitivelytell me what was happening.
(23:03):
So I sent Kayla thosescreenshots of me timing the
contractions through ContractionTimer app, and she was like,
yeah, I think you're in labor.
And I kept having this recurringfear throughout my pregnancy.
Because I was having so manyBraxton Hicks that my labor was
gonna fly by like really fast.
(23:24):
Then I had a pretty quick,relatively, especially for a
first time mom labor with Ellie,and so I kept telling Kayla and
my birth team, I'm so afraidthat no one will be here when I
had the baby.
And so they all knew that, andthey just kept encouraging me
like, we're okay coming as soonas you think you're in labor,
even if it ends up being alittle bit longer, we're okay
(23:45):
with that.
So that was really sweet ofthem.
So everyone came over.
So like I said, all of thiskinda started at midnight ish.
I think it was like one o'clockor so that I was like, okay,
yeah, everyone kind of startmaking their way over here.
And then by three o'clockeveryone was pretty much here.
My birth team consisted of mymidwife, Rebecca, her assistant.
(24:08):
Kayla and then Kayla and Paigeat the time were working
together.
And Paige is not only achiropractor, she's also a
doula.
So I, I had told Paige, if youwould like to be a part of the
birth, you are more than welcometo come.
So Kayla and Paige were there.
And then I had a birthphotographer, Erin, that was my
birth team.
And then, like I said, I alsohad my mom, my sisters, and
(24:30):
Brian, my husband, and thenEllie was there sleeping.
This is all happening in thenight.
So everyone got there aroundthree and it was just such a
sweet time just before everyonegot there though, because my
sisters were up with me andBrian I think was like getting
ready and stuff.
But my sisters and I were outthere and I'm like sitting on my
birth ball and I'm just like,I'm so happy you guys are here.
(24:53):
It just, it was such a specialtime.
They were helping string up thelights and getting just all of
my comfort measures out and justgetting the room all beautiful.
We put the, or I didn't,'cause Iwas very pregnant, but they
moved the, our dining room tableover near our tv and then we set
up the birth pool where mydining room table normally is,
(25:15):
which is like right in front ofour sliding glass doors.
So we set up, or they set upeverything there and it just
looked so beautiful.
It just, it felt like a party.
Like I just felt like we werehaving like a party in the
middle of the night.
Like it was really fun.
I had just the most amazingbirth team there.
When Rebecca got there, she justchecked on Daniel's heart rate
(25:37):
and all the things, and thenblood pressure, all that, just
medical things.
And then Paige did an adjustmenton me and actually did a round
of acupuncture for me as well.
That was really sweet of her todo that.
And the benefit of doing theacupuncture is it can sometimes
help just speed up the labor,because at that point, once
(25:57):
everyone got there, that fear ofno one being here for the birth
obviously left because everyonewas there.
And so I was like, yeah, let'sdo acupuncture.
Let's do all the things, andmoved through a lot of different
positions, hip squeeze his birthball, leaning over peanut ball,
like just doing all of the tipsand the tricks for just labor
(26:18):
positioning.
And then around five o'clock, sothis was a couple hours after
everyone got here.
I asked Rebecca to check me'cause I was just curious like
where we were at.
I mentioned in the first birthstory with Ellie, how my
contractions were reallymanageable.
Like I would say five or six outof a scale of one to 10.
And I would rate it about thesame with Daniel.
(26:39):
The contractions were like afour or a five, like very
manageable.
So I asked her to check me.
I just wanted to make sure wewere trending in the right
direction because I was havingregular contractions, but
because they were not super,super intense, I just wanted to
double check.
And so she checked me.
I was already seven to eightcentimeters dilated, 80% of
faced, and he was already movingdown.
(27:00):
He was positive one station.
And I did want thosecontractions to pick up.
I just knew that, especiallyafter having this experience
with Ellie, where thecontractions were very
manageable, and so I got to thateight centimeter mark pretty
quickly, but then things juststalled there For a while, I
really wanted to be active andgetting those contractions to
(27:23):
pick up, and I was like, let'sdo a dance party.
So I got on my birth ball.
I put on my wedding dance musicplaylist and just went to town
rocking and rolling on the birthball, doing all that, and that
was a really just a hilarioustime.
If I feel up to it, maybe I'llpost some of the videos of me up
on my birth ball, dancingaround.
(27:45):
But yeah, so that was reallyfun.
Brian made me a cup of coffee'cause at that point it was
getting to be about the time,like I would be up and starting
my day.
I was drinking a cup of coffee.
He brought it to me in a milkmug, which was hilarious.
A friend of ours got that mugfor us when they found out we
were pregnant with Ellie.
So it's just just this sillylittle joke.
But, so I was drinking coffeeand then Ellie wakes up around
(28:09):
seven ish, and so she was uparound seven and just seeing my
sweet baby girl.
I could just tell was like takenaback by everything that was
happening.
There were a ton of people inthe house and she was just like,
what is happening?
So Ellie was very timidly eatingher breakfast and I just looking
at her sweet little face, itjust started hitting me that
(28:32):
this was one of the last momentswhere it was just gonna be me,
Brian, and Ellie, just the threeof us.
And so I got very emotional,started crying, but it wasn't, I
wasn't.
Sad as much as it was just likea sentimental, bittersweet
moment.
Like I said, I was still tryingto get contractions to really
(28:54):
pick up, but they definitelyseemed to just stay that same
intensity.
Oh, another thing I forgot tomention was at one point Kayla
suggested us doing a sidelinerelease, which you may or may
not be familiar with that.
It's a spinning baby'stechnique, but I'm very tall.
I'm five 10.
And we tried to do like asideline release in my bed, but
(29:14):
my leg when it dangled down likewould touch the floor.
And so I was like, okay, wellwhat surface is high enough for
me to be able to get up on that?
My leg won't hit the floor.
And so we ended up putting me onour kitchen island and had the
whole team of people there tomake sure I like didn't fall
off.
But I also have a hilariouspicture of that whole setup.
(29:37):
So yeah, we did that.
Yeah, just no matter what wedid, things were just not really
picking up.
And so I asked Rebecca aroundeight o'clock to check me again
and I told her kind of ahead oftime, if things still look about
the same and I haven'tprogressed much more, I would
like for you to break my waterat that point.
(29:57):
And again, it's repeatinghistory'cause that's what
happened with Ellie.
So sure enough, she checks mearound eight o'clock and we were
still about the same.
And so I said, yeah, go aheadand break my water.
I.
She said I had a really toughbag of water, which I remember
my OB saying the same thingwhenever my water was broken.
With Ellie, they just had a hardtime breaking that amniotic sac
(30:18):
because it was really strong,like really tough.
So she broke my water and Iremember with Ellie that first
time things progressing veryquickly once the water was
broken, and I feared that thissecond time around,'cause I
just.
I wanted things to progress, butat the same time, I just in a
way dreaded that intensity justlike coming on me very quickly.
(30:41):
So I, I sat on the toilet rightafter she broke my water'cause I
wanted some of the amnioticfluid to just get in the toilet.
And I have a squatty potty,which if you don't have a
squatty potty, definitely getone.
So I put my feet up on theSquatty Potty and was just in a
squat, sitting over the toilet,relaxing my pelvic floor.
And thankfully it just, theintensity started slowly
(31:06):
building.
Instead of it just being likenight and day it started slowly
increasing in intensity, butstill got very intense after
that water was broken.
So Brian came into the bathroomat one point,'cause I was like
in there by myself, like moaningand making lots of sounds.
(31:26):
And so he came in there just tocheck on me.
It was just he and I in thatbathroom and he pointed out to
me later, that was the onlypoint in time that we were just
the two of us alone, likebesides me laboring in bed
before everyone else got there.
That was like the only timethroughout the whole experience
that it was just he and I.
So I asked if I could get intothe birth pool at that point,
(31:51):
and they were like, yeah,absolutely.
So I got into the birth pool,was getting a little bit
nauseous, but the water was sohot to me.
Like during transition you tendto get hot.
So I don't know if it wasbecause I was in transition or
that water was just like way toohot, but I got in that and I
felt like I was in like boilingwater.
(32:12):
So they started cooling me downwith a fan and some cool towels
and they even were putting someice in the water just to cool it
down.
But once I got in that water,things definitely picked up.
It was like my body just relaxedin the water.
And I just started going likevery internal, closing my eyes,
vocalizing, moaning, like reallylistening to like the words of
(32:37):
the worship music I was playing.
'cause music is like a really.
Big thing for me, it's likereally helps me get in the zone
and so having the worship musicplaying and just that internal
moaning and even like thatvocalizing where it like just
vibrated my voice box, helpedgive me some sense of control.
It was very comforting.
(32:58):
So I even remember at one pointcrying out to the Lord just
being like, Lord, help me.
This is just so intense.
And it wasn't like a, I don'tthink I can do this or anything
like that.
It was just like, this is sointense.
I need you to meet me herebecause this is too much for me
to just handle on my own.
(33:19):
And then I instinctively gotinto a squat position like I
just needed to move all of asudden.
I grabbed onto the side of thebirth pool in front of me and
started feeling just Danielmoving down the birth canal.
And I posted a video of hisactual birth, but I did not post
(33:40):
the, that video of him like justcoming down where I'm like
yelling.
I'm literally like hollering.
And there's that joke goingaround like for every peaceful
birth video, you're not seeingthe one of the moms screaming.
And so that is absolutelyaccurate.
Like it looks so peaceful, theone that I posted, but like the
one just before it.
I'm like hollering andscreaming.
(34:00):
Yeah, so that was a reallyintense sensation, having him
move down.
And then his head startedemerging and crowning, and then
very slowly you could see hiswhole head under the water.
And then right after his headcame out, I completely lost all
urge to push, my body stoppedcontracting and it just, it
(34:23):
stopped and it made me nervousbecause I.
Have never, I still haven't seenthis.
I have never seen a mom deliverthe head and then wait so long
to deliver the body.
And so at one point I askedRebecca, I was like, is
everything okay?
Do I need to be doing something?
(34:44):
And she's, yeah, he looks great.
Like I think if we wait another30 seconds or so, you'll need to
start pushing again.
And so I just sat there,composed myself, took a sip of
water.
Then Kayla was like, how aboutwe lean you back?
And so she helped me get backinto a reclined position, like
on the side of the pool, there'slike a little step or like a
little seat on inside the birthpool.
(35:06):
So I sat on that and leanedback, and then I did start
feeling that urge to push again.
Then I could, I don't recall ifI was paying attention to this,
maybe I wasn't.
But in the birth video that Ilike have watched since I can
hear the midwife's assistantcounting down the time between
his head being born and the timethat, the body is being born.
(35:29):
And so from start to finish, itwas about two and a half minutes
from his head being born to hisbody being born, which is crazy.
But yeah, so thankfully.
That position change helped.
I was able to feel that urge topush again and oh my goodness,
that final push was so intense.
Like it was like I had to musterup everything in me to get that
(35:54):
final push.
And then I later found out thatDaniel was coming out with his
hand near his head.
It's called a compoundpresentation.
Which also makes it a little bitmore difficult because you're
pushing out more surface area.
So Brian said that Rebeccatucked Daniel's hand back in,
and then it almost looked likean ejection button.
(36:15):
Like he, she pushed his fingersin and then his body just came
out.
And so Brian wanted to catchDaniel when he was born, and so
he was outside of the birthpool, but his arms and hands
were inside the water.
Helped guide Daniel out and thenhelped me bring him up to my
chest.
At one point, I even feltDaniel's little head, but yeah,
(36:37):
Rebecca helped push the fingersin.
Brian helped guide him out and Ihelped Brian guide Daniel out,
put him up on my chest, and veryquickly Daniel let out a good,
strong cry, and it was like thatimmediate.
Shift from the intensity of thatlast push to the pure joy of
(37:01):
having him there, and that painjust completely went away.
It was nothing but joy and itwas so beautiful.
Daniel just was so sweet andcontent.
Like I said, he let out thatgood cry, but then after that he
just was like so quiet and justlike taking it all in.
(37:21):
It was just so beautiful.
And then I mentioned in Ellie'sbirth story how she was born to
this song.
Jesus.
I have my doubts.
Well, funny enough, Daniel'shead was also born to that song.
Jesus, I have my doubts.
Then the song that his like FullBody and Everything was Born to
was a song also by John Foremancalled, thanks Be To God Who
(37:44):
Delivers Me, which could nothave been more perfect.
The Lord just purposefully andperfectly placed that song
because it was truly themeditation in my heart that it
was the Lord that brought methrough that, and so we just
hung out there for some time.
Ellie was there throughout thelabor and everything.
My mom decided to take her for alittle walk around our
(38:07):
neighborhood and probably aminute after they had left the
door, walked out the door,somebody called them and said,
Hey, the baby's almost here.
Maybe the baby's here.
And so my mom and Ellie cameright back.
And so Ellie and my mom missedthe actual birth'cause no one
realized how close I was todelivering.
So Ellie and my mom came backand I think it was like maybe
(38:31):
even a minute after I hadactually given birth to Daniel.
Ellie and Brian were rightthere, and Ellie was just so
fascinated with the fact thather little brother was born.
I also, oh, forgot to mention,throughout the pregnancy, Ellie
and I read a lot of like homebirth preparation books, like
children's books to just prepareher for that time because the
(38:52):
goal was to have her there for.
The labor and the birth.
Of course, if it had, if I hadlabored all through the night, I
wasn't gonna wake her up to beinvolved.
But the chance that I gavebirth, when it was a time that
she was up and awake, I wantedher to be involved.
So we had that just special timeof the four of us.
Now we're just taking it all in.
(39:14):
And Erin, the birthphotographer, she got some
beautiful photos of all of us atthat point.
And then.
Once I got out of the birthpool, I went and laid in my bed
and at that point, like that'swhen Rebecca was gonna help me
deliver the placenta and justcheck to make sure I didn't have
any tearing, all that kind ofstuff.
(39:34):
And that placenta ended up beingsuch a headache.
I was feeling the pressure, likeI wanted the placenta to come
out.
It did not want to come out.
I like got into a squatposition.
I kept doing all these differentposition changes to try to get
the placenta delivered.
It did not want to come out.
Eventually it did, but man, Ihad to really work for that.
(39:56):
It was like I had to dig deepagain and push out the placenta
as if I was delivering a baby.
I even passed a huge blood clot,like it almost looked like the
size of the placenta.
Like all of us were likeconfused when I delivered it.
But yeah, so that was crazy.
We also came to find out that Ihad an extra lobe on my
(40:17):
placenta, which Rebecca thinksbecause it was that extra lobe,
it just had more surface area toconnect to the uterus.
So she suspects that maybe thathad something to do with like it
detaching and it just taking alittle bit more time.
And then I also had an issuewith the placenta and the way my
umbilical cord, or the umbilicalcord and placenta were attached.
(40:39):
Because she could tell when shewas doing like a little bit of
gentle cord traction that itlike was not staying together,
and so she stopped.
She was like, okay, something isup with it.
And so sure enough, whenever shewas inspecting the placenta
after the delivery, she waslike, yeah, the insertion of
that placenta to the umbilicalcord was like a little funky.
And she said if they had foundthat over an ultrasound or
(41:02):
something, I may have beendisqualified from having my home
birth.
So I was very thankful that didnot happen.
Thankfully we didn't have anyissues with it, so that was a
blessing.
But yeah, so I delivered theplacenta.
She did give me a shot ofPitocin.
I was having a good amount ofbleeding, and so I had that shot
of Pitocin in my leg, and then Iwas able to go take a shower in
(41:26):
my shower, which was so nice,but also very draining.
Like I had lost a good amount ofblood and just was like really
exhausted, obviously fromlaboring all night, it was
refreshing but exhausting.
Got back into bed and one of thethings that I had told everyone
was, no matter what time of dayI deliver, I want to have
mimosas and I want to havebrunch food.
(41:48):
'cause that's like my favorite.
And actually there's a video ofme getting out of the birth pool
and in the background you canhear like champagne bottles
popping.
And I was like, whoa.
Sounds like a good time.
People were drinking mimosas andwe had brunch food at one point
in the night.
I think it was like five in themorning.
'cause that's like the earliest,you can order stuff at Panera.
But somebody like ordered PaneraBagels to be delivered at five
(42:09):
or six in the morning.
Brian and Ellie and Daniel andI, we all just snuggled up in
bed and it was such a sweet timeof just gratitude that all of
the things, all of the fears,all of the worries that I had.
None of those things came true.
Of course, the birth did not goexactly how I wanted.
(42:33):
If I, in a perfect world, didn'thave to have my water broken
again or have the difficultywith the placenta being born or
the miscarriage scares, but thepoint of birth is not for it to
go perfectly our way.
And that truly was just how Ifelt.
Just so much gratitude that whatthe Lord had done and the story
that he had written for Daniel'sbirth.
(42:55):
One thing that I really wish Ihad done a better job of
preparing for was the postpartumtime.
For example, one of the reasonswhy I did not wanna do another
hospital birth was I just feltlike after I had her, there were
people constantly like arotating door of people
constantly coming into our room,and it was just a lot I felt.
(43:17):
Like I couldn't rest ever.
All through the day and night,there were people coming in the
room and so I was like, okay,cool.
With this home birth, we don'thave that.
But I also did not think aboutthe fact that we had an older
child that still needed to be onher normal rhythm and routine.
And after everyone had left, Ihad some family come and see us
at our house and meet BabyDaniel and all that.
(43:38):
But then once everyone left itwas like, oh, now we have no
help.
'cause Brian's needing to takecare of Ellie and.
I'm needing to take care ofDaniel and myself and we just,
we did not prepare enough forthat immediate postpartum time
and for those first like coupleweeks and months, I wish so much
(43:59):
that I hadn't put morepreparation into hiring a
postpartum doula or just liningup childcare, having a
babysitter come and just watchEllie, so Brian and I could get
some rest or take care of somestuff.
That is one piece of advice thatI highly recommend, especially
if you have other children.
But yeah, so that was my birthstory with Daniel.
(44:21):
Overall.
It was, like I said, a, just abeautiful experience.
I'd love to leave you with somespiritual encouragement, so I
wanna take you back to thatmoment that I said giving birth
to Daniel.
That last push was so intense,but then there was just so much
joy after that moment.
There's a beautiful verse inJohn.
It's John 1621, and it says,when a woman is giving birth,
(44:45):
she has sorrow because her hourhas come, but when she has
delivered the baby, she nolonger remembers the anguish for
joy that a human being has beenborn into the world.
And oh my goodness, that couldnot be more perfect for what I
experienced it.
It's so true.
We only can sometimes focus onthe pain or the challenge.
(45:08):
I think it's so healthy to alsothink about, yes, those are
things we need to prepare for,but we also need to set our
heart and mind on the joy that'sset before us.
It reminds me too of Jesus andhow he asked the Lord if there's
any other way, let this cup passfor me.
Let this hardship, let thischallenge pass from me.
But.
(45:29):
He considered it joy to go tothe cross because he knew that
it meant that he would gain hischildren.
And that's what my hope andprayer for you is that you would
see that these challenges, thispain, this struggle is not for
nothing, that it truly is for agreater joy and a greater
(45:50):
purpose.
So I'm gonna say a prayer for usand then we will wrap up here.
Father God, I just thank you somuch for this sweet sister that
is listening to this podcast.
I pray that as you are stirringup in, in her heart the plans of
becoming pregnant, her heart'sdesire for her birth, or just
(46:13):
navigating this postpartum time.
Jesus, I pray that you wouldmeet her there, that you would
remind her of the joy that isset before her.
I pray that you would be therewith her as she is struggling
through whatever she is walkingthrough in this current season.
But Lord Jesus, you would justembrace her with your joy, with
(46:36):
your hope, with your peace asshe rests in your plans and
purposes.
It's in Jesus' name I pray.
Amen.
Thank you so much for stickingaround and listening to this
birth story for Daniel.
I pray it was an encouragementto you.
And next episode I will bediving into cervical ripening
(46:57):
methods, and this is somethingthat I've obviously mentioned in
both of my birth stories, so Ithought I would just go into
more detail about.
What were all the cervicalripening methods that I tried,
things that I'd recommend, and Ieven have a handout for you to
look over that as well.
That's it for today on FaithOver Fear, the Christian
(47:18):
Pregnancy and Birth podcast.
I hope today's conversationencouraged your heart and
equipped you to trust God moredeeply in your pregnancy, birth,
and motherhood journey.
Hey, before you go, I want togift you with a freebie.
I've compiled some of my mostpopular resources inside the
Christian mama birth preplibrary.
It includes practical birth prephandouts, such as the labor
(47:42):
positions, cheat sheet, birthpreferences, checklist, and
provider questions guide.
You'll also get exclusivediscounts and even a worship
labor playlist to bring God'speace into your birth space.
To get instant access, simplyvisit faith over fear birth.com
or click the link in the episodeshow notes to sign up.
(48:02):
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Let's keep choosing faith overfear.
(48:23):
Bye-bye for now.
Welcome to Faith Over Fear, the Christian
Pregnancy and Birth podcast.
I'm Natalie Portman, a wife,mama, birth doula and childbirth
educator.
And I believe God has a betterway for us to experience birth
one without fear, striving, orself-glorification.
If you're ready to stop feelingoverwhelmed and instead trust
(00:23):
the Lord more deeply inpregnancy.
Birth and motherhood.
You're in the right place here.
You'll find inspiring birthstories, biblical encouragement,
and practical wisdom to help youwalk in faith over fear during
this beautiful and challengingseason.
Now let's get started.
(00:46):
Well, hello there and welcome toepisode two where I'll be
sharing the birth story of myson, Daniel.
He's my second born.
And just the growth thathappened from that experience,
preparing for that birth, havinga different birth experience.
I had a hospital birth withEllie and deciding to go with a
(01:07):
home birth with Daniel was ahuge decision.
And one that we were reallyhappy we made, but a lot went
into that also.
It's funny because I became adoula after I had Ellie, and so
going into this birth with theknowledge and the experience
that I had after.
Being a doula for a couple yearsat that point, had some pros and
(01:29):
certainly some cons, whichagain, I'll go into more detail
about.
So with Ellie's pregnancy anddelivery, six weeks after I had
her, I went in for my OB visitand had an IUD put in at that
point.
And I did not have a period whenI had the IUD and so was in the
(01:50):
same boat.
As when we were trying to getpregnant, the first time was I
had no idea when I wasovulating, and so I did the same
thing again.
I used ovulation test strips.
I was checking my basal bodytemperature where you like take
your temperature first thing inthe morning, like before you get
out of bed.
And what's really cool is thisapp that I used had the test
(02:13):
strips and the basal body temp,which was a Bluetooth
temperature.
Monitor and so it would, I wouldtake my temperature and it would
log it inside of the app.
I'll put that Bluetooth monitorthe test strips in the app, in
the show notes so you know whichone I used.
But yeah, it was relativelyinexpensive but just helped us
like figure out when I mighthave a chance to actually
(02:35):
conceiving.
So that was really great to havethat information.
So we started trying for a babyin April of 2023.
We actually were at a weddingand we realized when we were on
that trip, like I was in theairport about to leave and
realized like, oh my goodness,I'm about to ovulate and I
(02:57):
getting pregnant the first time.
Thought, oh, for sure I'm gonnaget pregnant this time.
And so the time came and went.
Whenever I could start testingto see if I was pregnant.
It was not showing up that I waspregnant, and I was like, okay,
I just need to give it a couplemore days.
I just know I'm pregnant.
I was like feeling like I hadconceived.
I just felt some crampiness andthen come to find out I did not
(03:20):
get pregnant that time and I wasreally disappointed because I
just felt like I was doubting mybody that some, maybe something
was wrong.
Or I just felt foolish because Ihad misunderstood some of my
body's cues, thinking maybe Iwas pregnant.
So that was reallydisappointing, and I ended up
(03:41):
the next month, so that wasApril.
So then in May I was like, Ijust need to separate myself for
a bit, thinking about how thisultimately is not in my control,
but I really just wanted toposture my heart to be.
Just ready for whatever timingthe Lord had for us because I
(04:02):
just assumed that oh A plus Bequal CI find out when I'm
ovulating, we have sex, and ofcourse that's gonna mean I, I
get pregnant and I just, Ididn't trust the Lord at that
point and just really wasoperating out of a control and
fear place.
And so that next month we didn'ttry, I wasn't tracking.
(04:24):
I can't remember if I wastracking.
I just think I just needed tostep away from that.
And then come June, I tracked itand realized when that timeframe
would be.
We celebrated Ellie's secondbirthday earlier that month,
June 9th, and then I think itwas like a week or something
later is whenever I wasovulating.
And sure enough come like end ofJune, I found out that I was
(04:47):
pregnant.
And so again, very blessed, verythankful that we were able to
get pregnant on our second try.
Even though there was a couplemonths removed there, but I it
revealed in my heart how much Isay that I trust the Lord say
how I just, I want his will andall the things.
But there was still that controland that fear and that ickiness
(05:11):
in my heart that I really diddeep down feel like I could
control things that are out ofmy control.
So that was a rude awakening,but it did just make that time
when we did find out we werepregnant, just the gratitude and
the thankfulness that it didn'ttake very long for us to get
pregnant again.
And then what's so funny is atthat point, being a doula, I had
(05:34):
already decided who I was goingto reach out to about doula
support, and that's Kaylajourney.
And if you are in theJacksonville area, you probably
have heard of Kayla.
She is an incredible birth doulaand she and I actually later
started a birth doula collectivewhere we work together and
support each other's clients incase something crazy happens
(05:56):
where we have two clients inlabor at the same time or coming
off of a really long birth, andthen another client goes into
labor.
So we back each other up.
We keep in close communicationfor just support and just
getting through being a birthdoula.
It's a really intense role attimes, but having Kayla is such
(06:17):
a blessing.
But yeah, she knew like the dayafter I found out that I was
pregnant, I called her and said,Hey, what are you doing in March
of 2024?
Would you like to be my doula?
And she was of course happy tosay yes to that.
So it's obviously most peopledon't even realize they're
pregnant that early on, letalone hire a doula.
(06:38):
When you have a really gooddoula, you gotta book them
really quickly'cause they fillup fast.
But yeah, so Kayla is my doulaand crazy enough, I had another
miscarriage scare with thispregnancy.
I talked about that with Ellie'sand how we came to realize it
was a subchorionic hematoma.
And we suspect that same thinghappened again with this
(07:01):
pregnancy, although in some waysI, I was more prepared, but in
others, I just couldn't believethat it was happening again and
was like, surely this is amiscarriage.
Like the cramping that I had wasso bad, it was like causing me
to weep.
Like they were so bad.
The cramping and the.
(07:22):
Bleeding I had, I was passingsmall blood clots whenever I was
having that with this pregnancy,and that was terrifying.
Long story short, I had alreadystarted establishing care with a
local OB midwife practice herein Jacksonville called Full
Circle Women's Care.
They are phenomenal and they hadme do blood work to just see
(07:46):
what my levels, like the HCGhormones.
To see what was going on there.
And thankfully things weretrending normally where that
hormone was increasing at alevel that was leaning more
towards a healthy normalpregnancy.
(08:06):
And so that was amazing just toget that reassurance.
But there was still like acouple weeks where we were not
sure entirely what washappening.
But because I had that previousexperience, they were pretty
confident that everything wasokay.
I also went in and had anultrasound to just rule out like
(08:27):
ectopic pregnancy, making surethat the baby was growing
actually inside the uterus andnot in the fallopian tubes.
And so that ultrasound was veryreassuring that everything was
also normal there.
So that was just a scary, bumpystart.
But again, the Lord was justnear to us during that time, and
(08:47):
I really did have such a peaceabout it, even if it meant that
this pregnancy was not gonna beviable.
I really trusted the Lord in hisplan for whatever was happening.
So around the time of theanatomy scan, we had started
talking.
Brian and I had started talkingabout possibly shifting to a
(09:09):
home birth with a home birthmidwife.
And I had resolved at that pointthat I wanted to at least get
through the anatomy scan with myOB midwife practice.
And as long as things were stilllooking normal and healthy at
that point, switch to home birthcare.
(09:32):
So I had the anatomy scan, Ithink right at 20 weeks.
Everything looked good with babyand me.
The only thing that was ofconcern was I had a low lying
placenta, and the problem with alow lying placenta is if it
doesn't resolve where theplacenta moves away from the
cervix, like that opening wherebaby has to come through, then
(09:54):
the only option for delivery isa cesarean.
And thankfully, it's a very highpercentage of.
Placenta that move up and out ofthe way.
And so by the grace of God itdid.
And so that was, that ended upnot being an issue, but it was
definitely on my radar that Ihad to keep in mind as we
(10:16):
factored in the pros and cons ofpotentially going with a home
birth.
And there was just a lot thatwent into that.
I literally made pros and conslist.
I was regularly just like goingto the Lord in prayer about it.
Brian and I had manyconversations about it because
we had to consider the financialcost, the just the logistical
(10:38):
things and just there.
There were just so many factorsat play, but we did ultimately
decide to move forward with ahome birth midwife.
Her name is Rebecca Ray withSweet Grace Midwifery.
She's so precious and we, shehad home visits, so all of my
prenatal visits, I think she hasit a little bit differently now
(10:59):
that she has an office, but shewould come to my home and do the
prenatal visits there, which wasso great having a another child
where I would just have Rebeccacome during her naps, Ellie's
nap time, and it was so greatbecause I didn't have to.
Schedule a separate time to beaway or do anything.
(11:22):
It was just a quiet time in thehouse and Rebecca would come and
take care of me.
So that was really great.
And then I also forgot tomention earlier in the
pregnancy, started having to dovery regular chiropractic
adjustments, like from the verybeginning, like even five weeks
pregnant, which again, like somewomen don't even know they're
(11:42):
pregnant at that point.
But I, having that hypermobilityjust realized how much my body
began just shifting and startingto have a lot of pelvic pain
very early on, and so that wassuch a help Going to the
chiropractor.
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My chiropractor, her name isPaige.
Paige is no longer practicing inJacksonville.
She moved to be with family, butshe is Webster certified.
And that Webster technique isspecifically geared towards
adjusting pregnant women, and itwas such a help.
(12:23):
I honestly don't think I couldhave survived without her
regular adjustments.
I think I started out going likeonce or twice a month in the
beginning, and then I startedgoing every other week, and then
I started going weekly, and thenI think at the very end I was
going once or twice a week, butthat was a huge help.
Then leading up to the time thatI actually delivered, like
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starting at 35 weeks, that lastmonth, I was already feeling so
much pressure, like it almostfelt like a bowling ball just
sitting between my legs.
And I had Rebecca check me atthat point.
'cause I was just like, what ishappening?
I feel so much pressure already.
So at one of my appointments, Ihad her do a cervical check just
(13:11):
to see what was happeningbecause I was already having a
ton of contractions allthroughout that pregnancy.
I started losing my mucus plugkind of early, was having the
backache, having the nestingurge, and so I was like, I
wonder if this is changing mycervix at all.
And so I did have her check me.
And I was already a little bitdilated and starting to like
(13:34):
ripen and soften, but she wasalso noting that he was already
like very much engaged in mypelvis, which also explained why
I was starting to feel so muchpressure and I was doing all of
the cervical ripening methods,drinking red raspberry leaf tea,
eating dates, doing theacupuncture, eating spicy foods.
Having sex, like all of thosethings.
(13:55):
I was doing those, but becauseDaniel was already engaged in my
pelvis at 35 weeks, I steppedback just a little bit because I
did not want to go into laborearly.
And I forgot to mention this aswell.
If you are doing a home birth,you have to meet certain
criteria.
You have to be considered lowrisk enough to be under the care
(14:15):
of a home birth midwife.
If you or baby becomes high riskat any point in the pregnancy,
like even if it's like the veryend or like the start of labor
or during labor, then you haveto switch back into the care of
an OB or head to the hospital.
And that was a mental block forme because I had a very low
(14:38):
risk, easy pregnancy with Ellie.
For the most part was alsohaving a very straightforward,
low risk pregnancy with Daniel,but because of the amount of
contractions I was havingalready at 30 something weeks
already, him being engaged inthe pelvis.
I worried that at any pointsomething could change and I
(15:01):
would become high risk, or Iwould go into preterm labor.
I even had an instance where Ithought maybe my water had
broken because I was just havingso much vaginal fluid that I
thought, oh my gosh, did mywater break?
And that was a complicatingfactor throughout the pregnancy
that I did not worry about withmy hospital birth with Ellie.
(15:23):
Because I, first of all, again,didn't have the birth experience
that I had with Daniel'spregnancy where I had seen some
moms transfer from home birthsetting to hospital birth due to
high risk factors or otherthings.
And I also kept worrying thatsomething would pop up for me
(15:44):
personally.
That would disqualify me fromhaving the home birth that I was
really dreaming of or just otherjust scary things happening.
And that was something that theLord really had to work through
me and I felt like I had toconstantly, like literally
constantly surrender my plansfor my birth to the Lord.
(16:08):
It was.
Almost a daily exercise that Iwould have to think about.
This sounds negative, but Iwould have to think about, okay,
well what if the worst casescenario happens?
What if I become high risk andneed to find an OB and be under
their care?
Is that gonna be okay?
(16:29):
And I would have to talk myselfdown and just be like, and
Natalie, that would be okay ifthat happened, you would still
be okay.
Would you be sad that you arenot having the home birth you
want?
Absolutely.
And I'm allowed to feel sadabout that or even scarier.
Worst case scenarios.
What if I do end up having thehome birth and we need to
(16:50):
transfer to the hospital at somepoint in the labor?
Is that gonna be okay?
Are you okay with that?
And just trying to think throughworst case scenarios.
Not in a, trying to scare myselfway, but just to push myself
into thinking through my.
Perceived worst case scenariosand thinking it out, and it
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still just being okay and havinga plan for that.
If that does end up happening,and that's something that I
would recommend that you do aswell, is just bringing all of
that to the Lord as you'repraying through that, talking
through that with your husband,talking through that with
friends, talking through thatwith your doula if you have a
doula because.
(17:34):
I think so much of birth ismental.
I mentioned this in the firstepisode that so much of birth is
a physical, obviously challengeand journey, but so much of it
is spiritual and mental.
I think we do ourselves adisservice when we don't take
care of our mindset as weprepare for the pregnancy, the
(17:57):
birth, the postpartum time.
When we don't consider thechallenge that's ahead in the
mental aspect, we set ourselvesup for failure, and so I say
hope for the best, plan for thebest.
But you also need to be preparedfor the worst case scenario, and
I think it's a good exercisebecause it does just help you
(18:19):
shake off that lingering anxietyabout things that could happen,
things that might happen,instead of it just always
feeling like it's in thebackground or the back burner of
all of these things that mighthappen that you're just too
afraid to even engage with.
That's my tip there.
So again, going back to thestory, so I stopped doing some
(18:42):
of the cervical ripening methodsjust so that my body could stop
progressing and hopefully staypregnant for another couple
weeks.
So Rebecca was able to care forme.
If I went into labor at 37 weeksand on, if I went into labor
before that 37 week mark, Iwould've needed to go to a
(19:03):
hospital and my baby there.
So I held off for that time.
My due date was March 7th, andon March 1st, Rebecca came over
for my prenatal visit and I hadher check me again, and I was
two centimeters dilated, 75% aface, and baby boy was already
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really low.
Zero station.
I asked her to do a membranesweep at that point because
again, I was having so much ofthat warmup contractions, losing
more of the mucus plug, thebackache, all the things, and I
just was like, I want my body tojust finally get over this hump.
The other thing I forgot tomention was I did do
(19:45):
acupuncture, a couple rounds ofacupuncture, I think that week
prior, because once I was 37weeks, I started back up doing
all the things.
So this was like about a weeklater.
Rebecca was doing this check andso I asked her to do a membrane
sweep and at that point she alsowas able to stretch me to four
centimeters.
'cause the cervix was likereally stretchy.
After that membrane sweep, I hadlots of cramping, a little bit
(20:10):
of bleeding, which that's alllike very normal.
I.
I could just tell that theBraxton Hicks that I had been
having started increasing andit, they weren't very regular,
like they were very sporadic,but I could just tell that
things were starting to justincrease in intensity and so
that night I was craving Mexicanfood, so we ordered in some
(20:32):
Mexican and also thought, okay,cool, like spicy food will help
too.
Had my Mexican food.
And ended up like going andtaking an Epsom salt bath
because I was starting to justhave more regular contractions.
They were very mild.
It wasn't like I was needing tobreathe through them or
anything, but I could just tellthat they were picking up.
And so I called my mom and mysisters and I just said, I'm
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starting to experience thesecontractions.
I don't know if it's worth youguys coming over at some point,
or maybe even just spending thenight in case I go into labor in
the middle of the night.
Kinda left it up to them, butthey all decided to come over,
which I felt like was a reallyfun excuse for a sleepover.
And so my mom slept in our guestbedroom and my sisters ended up
(21:17):
sleeping out in our living roomon the couch, and so they stayed
the night.
This is embarrassing, but I toldBrian, I was like, okay, we are
having sex tonight because Ijust need this baby to come.
So we had sex, which also helpsstimulate contractions, semen
helps get the cervix to ripenand dilate and all the things.
(21:39):
So we had sex that night.
I think we went to bed around 10ish, which is late for me.
Like I am an old lady and I loveto go to bed like at eight
o'clock or nine o'clock.
I'm so old.
So that was a late night for us.
But we also, like I said, hadfamily staying with us and I was
like out there with my sisterschatting and whatnot.
Finally went to bed around 10o'clock and then around midnight
(22:00):
I woke up and started feelingjust very regular, powerful
contractions.
And I tell my clients all thetime, if you go into labor at
night, which most women do, ifyou go into labor at night, I
want you to try and ignore thosecontractions until you just
simply cannot ignore themanymore.
That's what I told myself.
(22:21):
And so I kept trying to just goback to sleep, lay down, change
positions, do whatever, but theywere definitely coming pretty
regularly and powerfully at thatpoint, I could not sleep.
So I started timing them aroundlike a little bit after
midnight, and they were comingpretty regularly.
So I sent screenshots to Kaylaand I'm like, okay, like I'm a
(22:42):
doula, like I should know this,but do you think I'm in labor?
Like it was very confusing.
And so that was just anotherbenefit of having a doula.
Even though I am a doula wasjust to kinda get that outside
perspective because it's almostlike you can't see the forest
through the trees when it'shappening to you.
Like you're feeling so manysensations that it was just nice
to have somebody definitivelytell me what was happening.
(23:03):
So I sent Kayla thosescreenshots of me timing the
contractions through ContractionTimer app, and she was like,
yeah, I think you're in labor.
And I kept having this recurringfear throughout my pregnancy.
Because I was having so manyBraxton Hicks that my labor was
gonna fly by like really fast.
(23:24):
Then I had a pretty quick,relatively, especially for a
first time mom labor with Ellie,and so I kept telling Kayla and
my birth team, I'm so afraidthat no one will be here when I
had the baby.
And so they all knew that, andthey just kept encouraging me
like, we're okay coming as soonas you think you're in labor,
even if it ends up being alittle bit longer, we're okay
(23:45):
with that.
So that was really sweet ofthem.
So everyone came over.
So like I said, all of thiskinda started at midnight ish.
I think it was like one o'clockor so that I was like, okay,
yeah, everyone kind of startmaking their way over here.
And then by three o'clockeveryone was pretty much here.
My birth team consisted of mymidwife, Rebecca, her assistant.
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Kayla and then Kayla and Paigeat the time were working
together.
And Paige is not only achiropractor, she's also a
doula.
So I, I had told Paige, if youwould like to be a part of the
birth, you are more than welcometo come.
So Kayla and Paige were there.
And then I had a birthphotographer, Erin, that was my
birth team.
And then, like I said, I alsohad my mom, my sisters, and
(24:30):
Brian, my husband, and thenEllie was there sleeping.
This is all happening in thenight.
So everyone got there aroundthree and it was just such a
sweet time just before everyonegot there though, because my
sisters were up with me andBrian I think was like getting
ready and stuff.
But my sisters and I were outthere and I'm like sitting on my
birth ball and I'm just like,I'm so happy you guys are here.
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It just, it was such a specialtime.
They were helping string up thelights and getting just all of
my comfort measures out and justgetting the room all beautiful.
We put the, or I didn't,'cause Iwas very pregnant, but they
moved the, our dining room tableover near our tv and then we set
up the birth pool where mydining room table normally is,
(25:15):
which is like right in front ofour sliding glass doors.
So we set up, or they set upeverything there and it just
looked so beautiful.
It just, it felt like a party.
Like I just felt like we werehaving like a party in the
middle of the night.
Like it was really fun.
I had just the most amazingbirth team there.
When Rebecca got there, she justchecked on Daniel's heart rate
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and all the things, and thenblood pressure, all that, just
medical things.
And then Paige did an adjustmenton me and actually did a round
of acupuncture for me as well.
That was really sweet of her todo that.
And the benefit of doing theacupuncture is it can sometimes
help just speed up the labor,because at that point, once
(25:57):
everyone got there, that fear ofno one being here for the birth
obviously left because everyonewas there.
And so I was like, yeah, let'sdo acupuncture.
Let's do all the things, andmoved through a lot of different
positions, hip squeeze his birthball, leaning over peanut ball,
like just doing all of the tipsand the tricks for just labor
(26:18):
positioning.
And then around five o'clock, sothis was a couple hours after
everyone got here.
I asked Rebecca to check me'cause I was just curious like
where we were at.
I mentioned in the first birthstory with Ellie, how my
contractions were reallymanageable.
Like I would say five or six outof a scale of one to 10.
And I would rate it about thesame with Daniel.
(26:39):
The contractions were like afour or a five, like very
manageable.
So I asked her to check me.
I just wanted to make sure wewere trending in the right
direction because I was havingregular contractions, but
because they were not super,super intense, I just wanted to
double check.
And so she checked me.
I was already seven to eightcentimeters dilated, 80% of
faced, and he was already movingdown.
(27:00):
He was positive one station.
And I did want thosecontractions to pick up.
I just knew that, especiallyafter having this experience
with Ellie, where thecontractions were very
manageable, and so I got to thateight centimeter mark pretty
quickly, but then things juststalled there For a while, I
really wanted to be active andgetting those contractions to
(27:23):
pick up, and I was like, let'sdo a dance party.
So I got on my birth ball.
I put on my wedding dance musicplaylist and just went to town
rocking and rolling on the birthball, doing all that, and that
was a really just a hilarioustime.
If I feel up to it, maybe I'llpost some of the videos of me up
on my birth ball, dancingaround.
(27:45):
But yeah, so that was reallyfun.
Brian made me a cup of coffee'cause at that point it was
getting to be about the time,like I would be up and starting
my day.
I was drinking a cup of coffee.
He brought it to me in a milkmug, which was hilarious.
A friend of ours got that mugfor us when they found out we
were pregnant with Ellie.
So it's just just this sillylittle joke.
But, so I was drinking coffeeand then Ellie wakes up around
(28:09):
seven ish, and so she was uparound seven and just seeing my
sweet baby girl.
I could just tell was like takenaback by everything that was
happening.
There were a ton of people inthe house and she was just like,
what is happening?
So Ellie was very timidly eatingher breakfast and I just looking
at her sweet little face, itjust started hitting me that
(28:32):
this was one of the last momentswhere it was just gonna be me,
Brian, and Ellie, just the threeof us.
And so I got very emotional,started crying, but it wasn't, I
wasn't.
Sad as much as it was just likea sentimental, bittersweet
moment.
Like I said, I was still tryingto get contractions to really
(28:54):
pick up, but they definitelyseemed to just stay that same
intensity.
Oh, another thing I forgot tomention was at one point Kayla
suggested us doing a sidelinerelease, which you may or may
not be familiar with that.
It's a spinning baby'stechnique, but I'm very tall.
I'm five 10.
And we tried to do like asideline release in my bed, but
(29:14):
my leg when it dangled down likewould touch the floor.
And so I was like, okay, wellwhat surface is high enough for
me to be able to get up on that?
My leg won't hit the floor.
And so we ended up putting me onour kitchen island and had the
whole team of people there tomake sure I like didn't fall
off.
But I also have a hilariouspicture of that whole setup.
(29:37):
So yeah, we did that.
Yeah, just no matter what wedid, things were just not really
picking up.
And so I asked Rebecca aroundeight o'clock to check me again
and I told her kind of ahead oftime, if things still look about
the same and I haven'tprogressed much more, I would
like for you to break my waterat that point.
(29:57):
And again, it's repeatinghistory'cause that's what
happened with Ellie.
So sure enough, she checks mearound eight o'clock and we were
still about the same.
And so I said, yeah, go aheadand break my water.
I.
She said I had a really toughbag of water, which I remember
my OB saying the same thingwhenever my water was broken.
With Ellie, they just had a hardtime breaking that amniotic sac
(30:18):
because it was really strong,like really tough.
So she broke my water and Iremember with Ellie that first
time things progressing veryquickly once the water was
broken, and I feared that thissecond time around,'cause I
just.
I wanted things to progress, butat the same time, I just in a
way dreaded that intensity justlike coming on me very quickly.
(30:41):
So I, I sat on the toilet rightafter she broke my water'cause I
wanted some of the amnioticfluid to just get in the toilet.
And I have a squatty potty,which if you don't have a
squatty potty, definitely getone.
So I put my feet up on theSquatty Potty and was just in a
squat, sitting over the toilet,relaxing my pelvic floor.
And thankfully it just, theintensity started slowly
(31:06):
building.
Instead of it just being likenight and day it started slowly
increasing in intensity, butstill got very intense after
that water was broken.
So Brian came into the bathroomat one point,'cause I was like
in there by myself, like moaningand making lots of sounds.
(31:26):
And so he came in there just tocheck on me.
It was just he and I in thatbathroom and he pointed out to
me later, that was the onlypoint in time that we were just
the two of us alone, likebesides me laboring in bed
before everyone else got there.
That was like the only timethroughout the whole experience
that it was just he and I.
So I asked if I could get intothe birth pool at that point,
(31:51):
and they were like, yeah,absolutely.
So I got into the birth pool,was getting a little bit
nauseous, but the water was sohot to me.
Like during transition you tendto get hot.
So I don't know if it wasbecause I was in transition or
that water was just like way toohot, but I got in that and I
felt like I was in like boilingwater.
(32:12):
So they started cooling me downwith a fan and some cool towels
and they even were putting someice in the water just to cool it
down.
But once I got in that water,things definitely picked up.
It was like my body just relaxedin the water.
And I just started going likevery internal, closing my eyes,
vocalizing, moaning, like reallylistening to like the words of
(32:37):
the worship music I was playing.
'cause music is like a really.
Big thing for me, it's likereally helps me get in the zone
and so having the worship musicplaying and just that internal
moaning and even like thatvocalizing where it like just
vibrated my voice box, helpedgive me some sense of control.
It was very comforting.
(32:58):
So I even remember at one pointcrying out to the Lord just
being like, Lord, help me.
This is just so intense.
And it wasn't like a, I don'tthink I can do this or anything
like that.
It was just like, this is sointense.
I need you to meet me herebecause this is too much for me
to just handle on my own.
(33:19):
And then I instinctively gotinto a squat position like I
just needed to move all of asudden.
I grabbed onto the side of thebirth pool in front of me and
started feeling just Danielmoving down the birth canal.
And I posted a video of hisactual birth, but I did not post
(33:40):
the, that video of him like justcoming down where I'm like
yelling.
I'm literally like hollering.
And there's that joke goingaround like for every peaceful
birth video, you're not seeingthe one of the moms screaming.
And so that is absolutelyaccurate.
Like it looks so peaceful, theone that I posted, but like the
one just before it.
I'm like hollering andscreaming.
(34:00):
Yeah, so that was a reallyintense sensation, having him
move down.
And then his head startedemerging and crowning, and then
very slowly you could see hiswhole head under the water.
And then right after his headcame out, I completely lost all
urge to push, my body stoppedcontracting and it just, it
(34:23):
stopped and it made me nervousbecause I.
Have never, I still haven't seenthis.
I have never seen a mom deliverthe head and then wait so long
to deliver the body.
And so at one point I askedRebecca, I was like, is
everything okay?
Do I need to be doing something?
(34:44):
And she's, yeah, he looks great.
Like I think if we wait another30 seconds or so, you'll need to
start pushing again.
And so I just sat there,composed myself, took a sip of
water.
Then Kayla was like, how aboutwe lean you back?
And so she helped me get backinto a reclined position, like
on the side of the pool, there'slike a little step or like a
little seat on inside the birthpool.
(35:06):
So I sat on that and leanedback, and then I did start
feeling that urge to push again.
Then I could, I don't recall ifI was paying attention to this,
maybe I wasn't.
But in the birth video that Ilike have watched since I can
hear the midwife's assistantcounting down the time between
his head being born and the timethat, the body is being born.
(35:29):
And so from start to finish, itwas about two and a half minutes
from his head being born to hisbody being born, which is crazy.
But yeah, so thankfully.
That position change helped.
I was able to feel that urge topush again and oh my goodness,
that final push was so intense.
Like it was like I had to musterup everything in me to get that
(35:54):
final push.
And then I later found out thatDaniel was coming out with his
hand near his head.
It's called a compoundpresentation.
Which also makes it a little bitmore difficult because you're
pushing out more surface area.
So Brian said that Rebeccatucked Daniel's hand back in,
and then it almost looked likean ejection button.
(36:15):
Like he, she pushed his fingersin and then his body just came
out.
And so Brian wanted to catchDaniel when he was born, and so
he was outside of the birthpool, but his arms and hands
were inside the water.
Helped guide Daniel out and thenhelped me bring him up to my
chest.
At one point, I even feltDaniel's little head, but yeah,
(36:37):
Rebecca helped push the fingersin.
Brian helped guide him out and Ihelped Brian guide Daniel out,
put him up on my chest, and veryquickly Daniel let out a good,
strong cry, and it was like thatimmediate.
Shift from the intensity of thatlast push to the pure joy of
(37:01):
having him there, and that painjust completely went away.
It was nothing but joy and itwas so beautiful.
Daniel just was so sweet andcontent.
Like I said, he let out thatgood cry, but then after that he
just was like so quiet and justlike taking it all in.
(37:21):
It was just so beautiful.
And then I mentioned in Ellie'sbirth story how she was born to
this song.
Jesus.
I have my doubts.
Well, funny enough, Daniel'shead was also born to that song.
Jesus, I have my doubts.
Then the song that his like FullBody and Everything was Born to
was a song also by John Foremancalled, thanks Be To God Who
(37:44):
Delivers Me, which could nothave been more perfect.
The Lord just purposefully andperfectly placed that song
because it was truly themeditation in my heart that it
was the Lord that brought methrough that, and so we just
hung out there for some time.
Ellie was there throughout thelabor and everything.
My mom decided to take her for alittle walk around our
(38:07):
neighborhood and probably aminute after they had left the
door, walked out the door,somebody called them and said,
Hey, the baby's almost here.
Maybe the baby's here.
And so my mom and Ellie cameright back.
And so Ellie and my mom missedthe actual birth'cause no one
realized how close I was todelivering.
So Ellie and my mom came backand I think it was like maybe
(38:31):
even a minute after I hadactually given birth to Daniel.
Ellie and Brian were rightthere, and Ellie was just so
fascinated with the fact thather little brother was born.
I also, oh, forgot to mention,throughout the pregnancy, Ellie
and I read a lot of like homebirth preparation books, like
children's books to just prepareher for that time because the
(38:52):
goal was to have her there for.
The labor and the birth.
Of course, if it had, if I hadlabored all through the night, I
wasn't gonna wake her up to beinvolved.
But the chance that I gavebirth, when it was a time that
she was up and awake, I wantedher to be involved.
So we had that just special timeof the four of us.
Now we're just taking it all in.
(39:14):
And Erin, the birthphotographer, she got some
beautiful photos of all of us atthat point.
And then.
Once I got out of the birthpool, I went and laid in my bed
and at that point, like that'swhen Rebecca was gonna help me
deliver the placenta and justcheck to make sure I didn't have
any tearing, all that kind ofstuff.
(39:34):
And that placenta ended up beingsuch a headache.
I was feeling the pressure, likeI wanted the placenta to come
out.
It did not want to come out.
I like got into a squatposition.
I kept doing all these differentposition changes to try to get
the placenta delivered.
It did not want to come out.
Eventually it did, but man, Ihad to really work for that.
(39:56):
It was like I had to dig deepagain and push out the placenta
as if I was delivering a baby.
I even passed a huge blood clot,like it almost looked like the
size of the placenta.
Like all of us were likeconfused when I delivered it.
But yeah, so that was crazy.
We also came to find out that Ihad an extra lobe on my
(40:17):
placenta, which Rebecca thinksbecause it was that extra lobe,
it just had more surface area toconnect to the uterus.
So she suspects that maybe thathad something to do with like it
detaching and it just taking alittle bit more time.
And then I also had an issuewith the placenta and the way my
umbilical cord, or the umbilicalcord and placenta were attached.
(40:39):
Because she could tell when shewas doing like a little bit of
gentle cord traction that itlike was not staying together,
and so she stopped.
She was like, okay, something isup with it.
And so sure enough, whenever shewas inspecting the placenta
after the delivery, she waslike, yeah, the insertion of
that placenta to the umbilicalcord was like a little funky.
And she said if they had foundthat over an ultrasound or
(41:02):
something, I may have beendisqualified from having my home
birth.
So I was very thankful that didnot happen.
Thankfully we didn't have anyissues with it, so that was a
blessing.
But yeah, so I delivered theplacenta.
She did give me a shot ofPitocin.
I was having a good amount ofbleeding, and so I had that shot
of Pitocin in my leg, and then Iwas able to go take a shower in
(41:26):
my shower, which was so nice,but also very draining.
Like I had lost a good amount ofblood and just was like really
exhausted, obviously fromlaboring all night, it was
refreshing but exhausting.
Got back into bed and one of thethings that I had told everyone
was, no matter what time of dayI deliver, I want to have
mimosas and I want to havebrunch food.
(41:48):
'cause that's like my favorite.
And actually there's a video ofme getting out of the birth pool
and in the background you canhear like champagne bottles
popping.
And I was like, whoa.
Sounds like a good time.
People were drinking mimosas andwe had brunch food at one point
in the night.
I think it was like five in themorning.
'cause that's like the earliest,you can order stuff at Panera.
But somebody like ordered PaneraBagels to be delivered at five
(42:09):
or six in the morning.
Brian and Ellie and Daniel andI, we all just snuggled up in
bed and it was such a sweet timeof just gratitude that all of
the things, all of the fears,all of the worries that I had.
None of those things came true.
Of course, the birth did not goexactly how I wanted.
(42:33):
If I, in a perfect world, didn'thave to have my water broken
again or have the difficultywith the placenta being born or
the miscarriage scares, but thepoint of birth is not for it to
go perfectly our way.
And that truly was just how Ifelt.
Just so much gratitude that whatthe Lord had done and the story
that he had written for Daniel'sbirth.
(42:55):
One thing that I really wish Ihad done a better job of
preparing for was the postpartumtime.
For example, one of the reasonswhy I did not wanna do another
hospital birth was I just feltlike after I had her, there were
people constantly like arotating door of people
constantly coming into our room,and it was just a lot I felt.
(43:17):
Like I couldn't rest ever.
All through the day and night,there were people coming in the
room and so I was like, okay,cool.
With this home birth, we don'thave that.
But I also did not think aboutthe fact that we had an older
child that still needed to be onher normal rhythm and routine.
And after everyone had left, Ihad some family come and see us
at our house and meet BabyDaniel and all that.
(43:38):
But then once everyone left itwas like, oh, now we have no
help.
'cause Brian's needing to takecare of Ellie and.
I'm needing to take care ofDaniel and myself and we just,
we did not prepare enough forthat immediate postpartum time
and for those first like coupleweeks and months, I wish so much
(43:59):
that I hadn't put morepreparation into hiring a
postpartum doula or just liningup childcare, having a
babysitter come and just watchEllie, so Brian and I could get
some rest or take care of somestuff.
That is one piece of advice thatI highly recommend, especially
if you have other children.
But yeah, so that was my birthstory with Daniel.
(44:21):
Overall.
It was, like I said, a, just abeautiful experience.
I'd love to leave you with somespiritual encouragement, so I
wanna take you back to thatmoment that I said giving birth
to Daniel.
That last push was so intense,but then there was just so much
joy after that moment.
There's a beautiful verse inJohn.
It's John 1621, and it says,when a woman is giving birth,
(44:45):
she has sorrow because her hourhas come, but when she has
delivered the baby, she nolonger remembers the anguish for
joy that a human being has beenborn into the world.
And oh my goodness, that couldnot be more perfect for what I
experienced it.
It's so true.
We only can sometimes focus onthe pain or the challenge.
(45:08):
I think it's so healthy to alsothink about, yes, those are
things we need to prepare for,but we also need to set our
heart and mind on the joy that'sset before us.
It reminds me too of Jesus andhow he asked the Lord if there's
any other way, let this cup passfor me.
Let this hardship, let thischallenge pass from me.
But.
(45:29):
He considered it joy to go tothe cross because he knew that
it meant that he would gain hischildren.
And that's what my hope andprayer for you is that you would
see that these challenges, thispain, this struggle is not for
nothing, that it truly is for agreater joy and a greater
(45:50):
purpose.
So I'm gonna say a prayer for usand then we will wrap up here.
Father God, I just thank you somuch for this sweet sister that
is listening to this podcast.
I pray that as you are stirringup in, in her heart the plans of
becoming pregnant, her heart'sdesire for her birth, or just
(46:13):
navigating this postpartum time.
Jesus, I pray that you wouldmeet her there, that you would
remind her of the joy that isset before her.
I pray that you would be therewith her as she is struggling
through whatever she is walkingthrough in this current season.
But Lord Jesus, you would justembrace her with your joy, with
(46:36):
your hope, with your peace asshe rests in your plans and
purposes.
It's in Jesus' name I pray.
Amen.
Thank you so much for stickingaround and listening to this
birth story for Daniel.
I pray it was an encouragementto you.
And next episode I will bediving into cervical ripening
(46:57):
methods, and this is somethingthat I've obviously mentioned in
both of my birth stories, so Ithought I would just go into
more detail about.
What were all the cervicalripening methods that I tried,
things that I'd recommend, and Ieven have a handout for you to
look over that as well.
That's it for today on FaithOver Fear, the Christian
(47:18):
Pregnancy and Birth podcast.
I hope today's conversationencouraged your heart and
equipped you to trust God moredeeply in your pregnancy, birth,
and motherhood journey.
Hey, before you go, I want togift you with a freebie.
I've compiled some of my mostpopular resources inside the
Christian mama birth preplibrary.
It includes practical birth prephandouts, such as the labor
(47:42):
positions, cheat sheet, birthpreferences, checklist, and
provider questions guide.
You'll also get exclusivediscounts and even a worship
labor playlist to bring God'speace into your birth space.
To get instant access, simplyvisit faith over fear birth.com
or click the link in the episodeshow notes to sign up.
(48:02):
You'll receive immediate accessto these valuable resources
created just for you.
If today's episode blessed you,please subscribe.
Leave a review and share it withsome other mamas who could use
this encouragement.
Your support helps more womenfind this podcast and embrace
faith-filled birth andmotherhood.
Let's keep choosing faith overfear.
(48:23):
Bye-bye for now.
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