December 20, 2021 • 11 mins
If you haven’t reached your peak potential in life because fear, doubt, or a lack of self-confidence have been holding you back, then this podcast is for you.
Fostering Success will help you discover that you are the VICTOR not the Victim in your life regardless of your circumstances.
Adam Starks, your host, weaves through the trials and tribulations that he’s endured in life, including rising out of the foster care system to reach the pinnacle of success in his chosen field. He has since dedicated his life to helping others overcome their obstacles to achieve their true calling and purpose in life by “fostering” their success. You’ll be listening to the authentic voice of someone who’s actually been there and done what you’re looking to do so you two can reach for AND achieve the pinnacle of success in every area of your life.
Not only will you be inspired and motivated to take the necessary next steps to achieve your definition of success. Adam Starks will teach, train, coach, and , mentor you along the path in each and every inspiring episode.
Fostering Success will help you discover that you are the VICTOR not the Victim in your life regardless of your circumstances.
Adam Starks, your host, weaves through the trials and tribulations that he’s endured in life, including rising out of the foster care system to reach the pinnacle of success in his chosen field. He has since dedicated his life to helping others overcome their obstacles to achieve their true calling and purpose in life by “fostering” their success. You’ll be listening to the authentic voice of someone who’s actually been there and done what you’re looking to do so you two can reach for AND achieve the pinnacle of success in every area of your life.
Not only will you be inspired and motivated to take the necessary next steps to achieve your definition of success. Adam Starks will teach, train, coach, and , mentor you along the path in each and every inspiring episode.
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:05):
If you've suffered with fear, doubt, worry, or lack of
confidence in your life, then this podcast is for you.
In fostering success, Doctor Adam Starks, having risen himself from
the foster care system to the pinnacle of success in life,
shares his blueprint in this podcast and interviews inspiring individuals
from around the world. You'll be touched, moved and motivated
(00:29):
by Adam and his guests so that you too can
foster your own success and catapult to the pinnacle of
success in any area of your life. Here's your host,
doctor Adam Starks.
Speaker 2 (00:47):
Welcome to Fostering Success with doctor Adam Starks. Today we
are talking about recovering from failure. Look, failure is part
of the process. It is inevitable for many of us
who are brave enough or courageous enough to navigate the
(01:11):
uncharted waters of change. If you are seeking to change,
you have to understand that you're not going to have
all of the knowledge. Let's say, for example, all right, parenting. Right,
you're trying to decide whether or not you want to
(01:32):
have a child, and there are literally over ten thousand
parenting books out there. Which one are you going to choose?
From you know which author, which category. There's so many
decisions to make that you ultimately realize that there's no
(01:52):
substitute for experience. Look, they can give you pointers, and
that's just that's just like any profession that you decide
to get into. You can get pointers all over the place,
all over the internet, at your local library, order the
book from Amazon, or bookshop your local bookstore. But there
(02:19):
is ultimately no substitute for experience. And what I mean
by that is you are going to have to have
first hand accounts of what is going on, because if
you are trying to succeed in Massachusetts, that's going to
(02:41):
be different than trying to succeed in North Carolina or Florida,
or West Virginia or Colorado. You get the picture. Wherever
you're at, there are different circumstances at play that are
going to hinder or help you achieved success. One of
(03:06):
my first failures happened when a restaurant that I tried
to start in Winchester, Virginia did not go my way.
And a big reason that didn't go my way is
because I was just simply naive. I was too trusting
of people, but I didn't listen to the right people.
(03:28):
So that was a double double whammy, all right. And
I didn't listen to the advice of my wife, I
didn't listen to the advice of those closest to me,
and I just went it alone, which was a drastic mistake.
And like I said in a previous episode, it is
(03:51):
so important to find your tribe. You're band of supporters,
and that includes people being brave enough to tell you
how you could do things better. Okay, but you have
to be receptive to that, and I was not, and
that ultimately led to my failure. So I tell you
(04:15):
this because now that is a lesson learned. I didn't
know it at the time, and I did not know
the value of that advice at the time, but now
I do, and I'm sharing that knowledge with you. You
have to take other matters into account. You have to
take other people's intuition, because I simply didn't have it
(04:38):
at the time. Like I said, I was getting involved
with people I trusted who ultimately betrayed me and took
advantage of me, and I lost a lot of money
in the process. And I never even got the doors open,
and that was as unfortunate as that was. I was
(04:58):
able to use those lives lessons to finally start my
restaurant here in Phillippy, West Virginia, which was successful for
a while until COVID stuck a dagger in that and
twisted it to make sure it was dead. That being said,
there were so many invaluable lessons there. Once I've actually
(05:21):
got my doors open, and I was able to write
a book on that and started an entirely different business.
So if you go to the Vulture dot com you
will see a book in an app and another podcast
coming out that will talk about the lessons learned from
(05:46):
that venture. And it was a painful process. I'm not
going to sit here and lie to you. It was painful.
It hurt my pride, bruised my ego, and then kick
me while I was down on the ground. It's hurt,
all right, from a monetary standpoint. From an emotional and
(06:08):
mental standpoint, I was absolutely devastated when I experienced those
two failures. However, I was able to turn it into
something positive to one make sure that my family didn't
go through it and make sure others did not have
(06:29):
to suffer what I suffered. So in that suffering, I
was able to see the light, and that's what failure
means to you. So if you're afraid to try again,
that's understandable and that's natural. But what's also natural is
overcoming that defense mechanism. What's also natural is rising to
(06:56):
the occasion, because humans have done that throughout our entire
history and you're no different. You have just as much
potential as anyone else out there, but you have to
get it into your head that it's okay to fail.
(07:17):
As I stated before, failure is not fail It is
meant to be a lesson, and failure can also be
rebranded as a mistake. We make mistakes. No one's perfect here.
And if you think you're going through life perfect perfectly
by maintaining the status quo, congratulations, maybe you are all
(07:41):
right and that's where you're at in life, and that's great.
But if you want more, you're listening to the show,
so obviously you want something more, and you have to
determine what that is, and you have to determine what
is holding you back. And for some of you, it's
the fear of failure, which we covered in that another episode.
But for some of you, you have failed once before
(08:04):
and it hurt and you don't want to do it again.
But you have so much life ahead of you and
so much more to experience. That may not have been
your thing. Okay, maybe you had to quit because you
were out of money, or there was other more pressing circumstances.
(08:30):
What's to say that this next time won't be better?
All right? And again without knowing your situation. I just
want to put these additional thoughts in your thinking process
because you deserve another chance. You deserve to succeed, and
(08:57):
it's okay if you have to try again. It's okay
if you have to pivot. When I went to college
in the early two thousand, I was determined to be
an Olympic athlete. Since I don't have any gold medals
around my neck and I never even made it to
become an Olympic caliber athlete, you will know I had
(09:21):
to pivot onto something else. Thankfully, I had my business
degree to fall on, and I landed in restaurant management
until I figured out what I wanted to do. And
that's many of us. I mean, we work jobs that
we don't necessarily like or desire. I like the everyday
challenge of the industry, but ultimately it wasn't what I
(09:44):
wanted in this life, because it just took eighty to
one hundred hours a week for me to even be
successful in that role, and that was just too much
of a sacrifice, because it was sacrificing my outse. I
found my family and then the other talents that I
(10:04):
wanted to hone in on. And so I tell you
that because I want you to think through your process
and what you're doing right now and why you haven't
made the move to do something else, something better, something
(10:25):
more in line with your state of happiness. And once
we figured that out, then you're ready to take the
real journey. And I look forward to being a part
of that with you. Until next time. Thank you for
(10:45):
listening to Fostering Success.
Speaker 1 (10:51):
So that's it for today's episode. Head on over to
iTunes and subscribe to the show. One lucky listener every
single week the post a review in iTunes, we'll win
a chance to win the grand prize drawing for a
private VIP day with doctor Adam Starks himself. Be sure
to head on over to Fostering Success podcast dot com
and pick up a free copy of Adam's Gift and
(11:14):
join us on the next episode.
If you've suffered with fear, doubt, worry, or lack of
confidence in your life, then this podcast is for you.
In fostering success, Doctor Adam Starks, having risen himself from
the foster care system to the pinnacle of success in life,
shares his blueprint in this podcast and interviews inspiring individuals
from around the world. You'll be touched, moved and motivated
(00:29):
by Adam and his guests so that you too can
foster your own success and catapult to the pinnacle of
success in any area of your life. Here's your host,
doctor Adam Starks.
Speaker 2 (00:47):
Welcome to Fostering Success with doctor Adam Starks. Today we
are talking about recovering from failure. Look, failure is part
of the process. It is inevitable for many of us
who are brave enough or courageous enough to navigate the
(01:11):
uncharted waters of change. If you are seeking to change,
you have to understand that you're not going to have
all of the knowledge. Let's say, for example, all right, parenting. Right,
you're trying to decide whether or not you want to
(01:32):
have a child, and there are literally over ten thousand
parenting books out there. Which one are you going to choose?
From you know which author, which category. There's so many
decisions to make that you ultimately realize that there's no
(01:52):
substitute for experience. Look, they can give you pointers, and
that's just that's just like any profession that you decide
to get into. You can get pointers all over the place,
all over the internet, at your local library, order the
book from Amazon, or bookshop your local bookstore. But there
(02:19):
is ultimately no substitute for experience. And what I mean
by that is you are going to have to have
first hand accounts of what is going on, because if
you are trying to succeed in Massachusetts, that's going to
(02:41):
be different than trying to succeed in North Carolina or Florida,
or West Virginia or Colorado. You get the picture. Wherever
you're at, there are different circumstances at play that are
going to hinder or help you achieved success. One of
(03:06):
my first failures happened when a restaurant that I tried
to start in Winchester, Virginia did not go my way.
And a big reason that didn't go my way is
because I was just simply naive. I was too trusting
of people, but I didn't listen to the right people.
(03:28):
So that was a double double whammy, all right. And
I didn't listen to the advice of my wife, I
didn't listen to the advice of those closest to me,
and I just went it alone, which was a drastic mistake.
And like I said in a previous episode, it is
(03:51):
so important to find your tribe. You're band of supporters,
and that includes people being brave enough to tell you
how you could do things better. Okay, but you have
to be receptive to that, and I was not, and
that ultimately led to my failure. So I tell you
(04:15):
this because now that is a lesson learned. I didn't
know it at the time, and I did not know
the value of that advice at the time, but now
I do, and I'm sharing that knowledge with you. You
have to take other matters into account. You have to
take other people's intuition, because I simply didn't have it
(04:38):
at the time. Like I said, I was getting involved
with people I trusted who ultimately betrayed me and took
advantage of me, and I lost a lot of money
in the process. And I never even got the doors open,
and that was as unfortunate as that was. I was
(04:58):
able to use those lives lessons to finally start my
restaurant here in Phillippy, West Virginia, which was successful for
a while until COVID stuck a dagger in that and
twisted it to make sure it was dead. That being said,
there were so many invaluable lessons there. Once I've actually
(05:21):
got my doors open, and I was able to write
a book on that and started an entirely different business.
So if you go to the Vulture dot com you
will see a book in an app and another podcast
coming out that will talk about the lessons learned from
(05:46):
that venture. And it was a painful process. I'm not
going to sit here and lie to you. It was painful.
It hurt my pride, bruised my ego, and then kick
me while I was down on the ground. It's hurt,
all right, from a monetary standpoint. From an emotional and
(06:08):
mental standpoint, I was absolutely devastated when I experienced those
two failures. However, I was able to turn it into
something positive to one make sure that my family didn't
go through it and make sure others did not have
(06:29):
to suffer what I suffered. So in that suffering, I
was able to see the light, and that's what failure
means to you. So if you're afraid to try again,
that's understandable and that's natural. But what's also natural is
overcoming that defense mechanism. What's also natural is rising to
(06:56):
the occasion, because humans have done that throughout our entire
history and you're no different. You have just as much
potential as anyone else out there, but you have to
get it into your head that it's okay to fail.
(07:17):
As I stated before, failure is not fail It is
meant to be a lesson, and failure can also be
rebranded as a mistake. We make mistakes. No one's perfect here.
And if you think you're going through life perfect perfectly
by maintaining the status quo, congratulations, maybe you are all
(07:41):
right and that's where you're at in life, and that's great.
But if you want more, you're listening to the show,
so obviously you want something more, and you have to
determine what that is, and you have to determine what
is holding you back. And for some of you, it's
the fear of failure, which we covered in that another episode.
But for some of you, you have failed once before
(08:04):
and it hurt and you don't want to do it again.
But you have so much life ahead of you and
so much more to experience. That may not have been
your thing. Okay, maybe you had to quit because you
were out of money, or there was other more pressing circumstances.
(08:30):
What's to say that this next time won't be better?
All right? And again without knowing your situation. I just
want to put these additional thoughts in your thinking process
because you deserve another chance. You deserve to succeed, and
(08:57):
it's okay if you have to try again. It's okay
if you have to pivot. When I went to college
in the early two thousand, I was determined to be
an Olympic athlete. Since I don't have any gold medals
around my neck and I never even made it to
become an Olympic caliber athlete, you will know I had
(09:21):
to pivot onto something else. Thankfully, I had my business
degree to fall on, and I landed in restaurant management
until I figured out what I wanted to do. And
that's many of us. I mean, we work jobs that
we don't necessarily like or desire. I like the everyday
challenge of the industry, but ultimately it wasn't what I
(09:44):
wanted in this life, because it just took eighty to
one hundred hours a week for me to even be
successful in that role, and that was just too much
of a sacrifice, because it was sacrificing my outse. I
found my family and then the other talents that I
(10:04):
wanted to hone in on. And so I tell you
that because I want you to think through your process
and what you're doing right now and why you haven't
made the move to do something else, something better, something
(10:25):
more in line with your state of happiness. And once
we figured that out, then you're ready to take the
real journey. And I look forward to being a part
of that with you. Until next time. Thank you for
(10:45):
listening to Fostering Success.
Speaker 1 (10:51):
So that's it for today's episode. Head on over to
iTunes and subscribe to the show. One lucky listener every
single week the post a review in iTunes, we'll win
a chance to win the grand prize drawing for a
private VIP day with doctor Adam Starks himself. Be sure
to head on over to Fostering Success podcast dot com
and pick up a free copy of Adam's Gift and
(11:14):
join us on the next episode.
Popular Podcasts
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.
My Favorite Murder with Karen Kilgariff and Georgia Hardstark
My Favorite Murder is a true crime comedy podcast hosted by Karen Kilgariff and Georgia Hardstark. Each week, Karen and Georgia share compelling true crimes and hometown stories from friends and listeners. Since MFM launched in January of 2016, Karen and Georgia have shared their lifelong interest in true crime and have covered stories of infamous serial killers like the Night Stalker, mysterious cold cases, captivating cults, incredible survivor stories and important events from history like the Tulsa race massacre of 1921. My Favorite Murder is part of the Exactly Right podcast network that provides a platform for bold, creative voices to bring to life provocative, entertaining and relatable stories for audiences everywhere. The Exactly Right roster of podcasts covers a variety of topics including historic true crime, comedic interviews and news, science, pop culture and more. Podcasts on the network include Buried Bones with Kate Winkler Dawson and Paul Holes, That's Messed Up: An SVU Podcast, This Podcast Will Kill You, Bananas and more.
The Joe Rogan Experience
The official podcast of comedian Joe Rogan.