December 27, 2021 • 9 mins
I challenge you to look into a mirror and say "I am valued, I am worthy".
Make it a habit of telling yourself that and self-talk your way to ultimate success.
Make it a habit of telling yourself that and self-talk your way to ultimate success.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:05):
If you've suffered with fear, doubt, worry, or lack of
confidence in your life, then this podcast is for you.
In Fostering success, Doctor Adam Starks, having risen himself from
the foster care system to the pinnacle of success in life,
shares his blueprint in this podcast and interviews inspiring individuals
from around the world. You'll be touched, moved, and motivated
(00:29):
by Adam and his guests so that you too can
foster your own success and catapult to the pinnacle of
success in any area of your life. Here's your host,
Doctor Adam Starks.
Speaker 2 (00:47):
Welcome to Fostering Success with Doctor Adam Starks. Today we
are talking about one of my favorite topics, self love,
and what that essentially means is that we covered in
the very first episode where I challenged you to look
into a mirror and say I am valued, I am worthy,
(01:11):
not necessarily so much for someone else as for yourself.
Because I can tell you that I believe in you.
I know you can do it. But until you believe
that with your entire being, it doesn't matter what I say,
it doesn't matter what I think, And so we have
(01:32):
to come back to self love to reach our ultimate success.
And I learned this reading a book titled Love by
Leo Buscaglia. And I just want to read a passage
here for you to think about again. This is Love
by Leo Buscaglia. You can pick it up wherever books
(01:54):
are sold, he says. A London psychiatrist, Already Lang, in
his Books of Experience, suggests something very provoking. All right.
He says, what we think is less than what we know.
What we know is less than what we love. What
(02:14):
we love is so much less than what there is.
And to this precise extent, we are much less than
what we are. And Buscaglier goes on to say, knowing this,
we should have a tremendous desire to become. If all
of life is directed toward the process of becoming, of growing,
(02:38):
of seeing, of feeling, of touching, of smelling, there won't
be a boring second. I scream at my students. Think
of what you are and all the fantastic potential of you.
I love that, man, I love that right. When I
think about my potential, when I think about the potential
(03:01):
of community of others of you, Okay, I think first
in terms of self love. And that's a process it's
a process that you have to go through. It wasn't
something that was innate or born into me. I had
to learn that, and it took me so much longer.
A right, It took me, being a man in my
(03:23):
early thirties to learn what that actually meant. And I
could not truly love others until I loved myself. I
could not truly experience gratitude or the gratitude of my
successes until I looked within and realized that I myself
was enough, I was valued. I am a human being
(03:47):
on this vast planet trying to figure it all out,
all right. That's where I was ten eleven years ago, right,
and many of you are in the same boat today.
It doesn't matter. You could be twenty and have it
figured out in sixty and not have it figured out
all right, or vice versa. Right. The human experience is
incredibly complex, and that's why we shouldn't compare ourselves to
(04:11):
one another. Especially you'll highlight reels on social media. Right,
we're all walking this journey a bit differently. You'll hear
that cliche that we're all in the same boat, and
that's just fundamentally untrue. You know, some of us are
in canoes and some of us are in super yachts.
You know everything in between. And so it's really up
(04:32):
to you to determine how valued you are. And once
you recognize that value, everyone else will see your worth
or you will surround yourself with people who see your worth.
And that's where we want to get. And so I
want to build on that first episode. Right, you are valued,
(04:52):
you are valued. I want to build on that. You
are worthy. I want to build on that. And I
hope by this point you've made of the habit of
telling yourself that to the point where you believe it,
because I can believe it all I want, but it
doesn't matter until you do. So I want to give
you some exercises for that. So the first one is,
(05:14):
you want to be mindful, right, be mindful of your emotions.
I used to be my own worst self critic, and
I still i am at times. I Mean, it's a process,
and it may be a lifelong process that I don't
quite master, but the fact that I'm still working on
it is what matters, Okay, And recognizing that shortcoming, that
(05:36):
flaw that keeps me from the focus that I need
to maintain my success. Right, so be mindful of where
you're at in your own mind. So instead of being
self criticizing, saying, oh man, I'm an idiot. Ah, why
didn't I know that? Why didn't I say that? Why
didn't I do that? Say next time, I'm going to
(05:58):
do something different because what I did was inadequate, and
I could have remedied that situation had I been more assertive,
had I been less toxic, or whatever the case may be.
And that's something that you have to determine, and you know,
if we're working together, we could certainly figure that out.
(06:18):
Next is practice good self care, you know, staying up
all times of night, you know, trying to do work
and skipping lunch, skipping breakfast, skipping exercise, or you know,
having healthy, meaningful interactions with our friends. All of that
(06:38):
stuff helps fill your bucket, helps you become and maintain
who you are as a human being. We don't want
to seclude ourselves from what is needed to maintain us.
So you need sleep, you need to eat. Work is
always going to be there or that task is going
(06:59):
to be there, and the human body can only do
so much. So just keep that in mind. Right forgive
yourself as I've stated in several episodes, You're going to
make mistakes from time to time, and that's okay. That
does not mean you're an idiot. That does mean that
you're less than It just means you made a mistake.
(07:22):
You had a misstep, and now it can serve as
a lesson. All right. You have to acknowledge it, you
have to own it, and now that you know better,
do better. Ultimately, that is the best that any of
us can do. And until you recognize that, you're going
to lead a miserable life full of unknowns. But it
(07:43):
doesn't have to be that way. So I encourage you
to forgive yourself and lastly, live Take that chance. You know,
if it's a date with a friend, or you want
to ask someone album on the day, you know because
you have feelings for them, take that chance. Or if
(08:04):
there's an opportunity across the country and you know this
is just that one fleeting opportunity, and you're qualified and
you're confident enough in every other aspect except that leap
of faith. Take the leap. You can do it. I
know you can, but I want you to believe it too.
(08:25):
Until next time, thank you for listening to Fostering Success.
Speaker 1 (08:34):
So that's it for today's episode. Head on over to
iTunes and subscribe to the show. One lucky listener every
single week to post a review in iTunes, we'll win
a chance to win the grand prize drawing for a
private VIP day with doctor Adam Starks himself. Be sure
to head on over to Fostering Success podcast dot com
and pick up a free copy of Adam's Gift and
(08:56):
join us on the next episode.
If you've suffered with fear, doubt, worry, or lack of
confidence in your life, then this podcast is for you.
In Fostering success, Doctor Adam Starks, having risen himself from
the foster care system to the pinnacle of success in life,
shares his blueprint in this podcast and interviews inspiring individuals
from around the world. You'll be touched, moved, and motivated
(00:29):
by Adam and his guests so that you too can
foster your own success and catapult to the pinnacle of
success in any area of your life. Here's your host,
Doctor Adam Starks.
Speaker 2 (00:47):
Welcome to Fostering Success with Doctor Adam Starks. Today we
are talking about one of my favorite topics, self love,
and what that essentially means is that we covered in
the very first episode where I challenged you to look
into a mirror and say I am valued, I am worthy,
(01:11):
not necessarily so much for someone else as for yourself.
Because I can tell you that I believe in you.
I know you can do it. But until you believe
that with your entire being, it doesn't matter what I say,
it doesn't matter what I think, And so we have
(01:32):
to come back to self love to reach our ultimate success.
And I learned this reading a book titled Love by
Leo Buscaglia. And I just want to read a passage
here for you to think about again. This is Love
by Leo Buscaglia. You can pick it up wherever books
(01:54):
are sold, he says. A London psychiatrist, Already Lang, in
his Books of Experience, suggests something very provoking. All right.
He says, what we think is less than what we know.
What we know is less than what we love. What
(02:14):
we love is so much less than what there is.
And to this precise extent, we are much less than
what we are. And Buscaglier goes on to say, knowing this,
we should have a tremendous desire to become. If all
of life is directed toward the process of becoming, of growing,
(02:38):
of seeing, of feeling, of touching, of smelling, there won't
be a boring second. I scream at my students. Think
of what you are and all the fantastic potential of you.
I love that, man, I love that right. When I
think about my potential, when I think about the potential
(03:01):
of community of others of you, Okay, I think first
in terms of self love. And that's a process it's
a process that you have to go through. It wasn't
something that was innate or born into me. I had
to learn that, and it took me so much longer.
A right, It took me, being a man in my
(03:23):
early thirties to learn what that actually meant. And I
could not truly love others until I loved myself. I
could not truly experience gratitude or the gratitude of my
successes until I looked within and realized that I myself
was enough, I was valued. I am a human being
(03:47):
on this vast planet trying to figure it all out,
all right. That's where I was ten eleven years ago, right,
and many of you are in the same boat today.
It doesn't matter. You could be twenty and have it
figured out in sixty and not have it figured out
all right, or vice versa. Right. The human experience is
incredibly complex, and that's why we shouldn't compare ourselves to
(04:11):
one another. Especially you'll highlight reels on social media. Right,
we're all walking this journey a bit differently. You'll hear
that cliche that we're all in the same boat, and
that's just fundamentally untrue. You know, some of us are
in canoes and some of us are in super yachts.
You know everything in between. And so it's really up
(04:32):
to you to determine how valued you are. And once
you recognize that value, everyone else will see your worth
or you will surround yourself with people who see your worth.
And that's where we want to get. And so I
want to build on that first episode. Right, you are valued,
(04:52):
you are valued. I want to build on that. You
are worthy. I want to build on that. And I
hope by this point you've made of the habit of
telling yourself that to the point where you believe it,
because I can believe it all I want, but it
doesn't matter until you do. So I want to give
you some exercises for that. So the first one is,
(05:14):
you want to be mindful, right, be mindful of your emotions.
I used to be my own worst self critic, and
I still i am at times. I Mean, it's a process,
and it may be a lifelong process that I don't
quite master, but the fact that I'm still working on
it is what matters, Okay, And recognizing that shortcoming, that
(05:36):
flaw that keeps me from the focus that I need
to maintain my success. Right, so be mindful of where
you're at in your own mind. So instead of being
self criticizing, saying, oh man, I'm an idiot. Ah, why
didn't I know that? Why didn't I say that? Why
didn't I do that? Say next time, I'm going to
(05:58):
do something different because what I did was inadequate, and
I could have remedied that situation had I been more assertive,
had I been less toxic, or whatever the case may be.
And that's something that you have to determine, and you know,
if we're working together, we could certainly figure that out.
(06:18):
Next is practice good self care, you know, staying up
all times of night, you know, trying to do work
and skipping lunch, skipping breakfast, skipping exercise, or you know,
having healthy, meaningful interactions with our friends. All of that
(06:38):
stuff helps fill your bucket, helps you become and maintain
who you are as a human being. We don't want
to seclude ourselves from what is needed to maintain us.
So you need sleep, you need to eat. Work is
always going to be there or that task is going
(06:59):
to be there, and the human body can only do
so much. So just keep that in mind. Right forgive
yourself as I've stated in several episodes, You're going to
make mistakes from time to time, and that's okay. That
does not mean you're an idiot. That does mean that
you're less than It just means you made a mistake.
(07:22):
You had a misstep, and now it can serve as
a lesson. All right. You have to acknowledge it, you
have to own it, and now that you know better,
do better. Ultimately, that is the best that any of
us can do. And until you recognize that, you're going
to lead a miserable life full of unknowns. But it
(07:43):
doesn't have to be that way. So I encourage you
to forgive yourself and lastly, live Take that chance. You know,
if it's a date with a friend, or you want
to ask someone album on the day, you know because
you have feelings for them, take that chance. Or if
(08:04):
there's an opportunity across the country and you know this
is just that one fleeting opportunity, and you're qualified and
you're confident enough in every other aspect except that leap
of faith. Take the leap. You can do it. I
know you can, but I want you to believe it too.
(08:25):
Until next time, thank you for listening to Fostering Success.
Speaker 1 (08:34):
So that's it for today's episode. Head on over to
iTunes and subscribe to the show. One lucky listener every
single week to post a review in iTunes, we'll win
a chance to win the grand prize drawing for a
private VIP day with doctor Adam Starks himself. Be sure
to head on over to Fostering Success podcast dot com
and pick up a free copy of Adam's Gift and
(08:56):
join us on the next episode.
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